Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 106

My Worth is Not Attached to What I Do

You work from sunup to sundown, afraid to stop, afraid to lose your worth in the eyes of others. But more important, you are afraid that the moment you stop doing, you will lose the worth and value you have placed on yourself. It is this, do- more -better- faster approach to living that leads to physical, mental, emotional and spiritual imbalance - Iyanla

Balance!

I have heard about this term "Work-Life Balance"
The term became popular because we became a society that work more than anything else, we put work above it all because we believed it allowed us to live better lives. A bit of wrong sided logic.
I have learnt that without balance, the scales are tipped, and usually not in your favour.
I have also learnt that when one is doing something with purpose and intention the balance is automatically built in.
Consider this, if you love yourself and is moving on purpose, you will make it your business to rest, you will be having fun and you will be grateful for the little things, you will make it your business to have fun, to rest, to play, to exercise, to be.
It is built it
As opposed to when the work is just to survive and pay the bills and more importantly to prove your worth to others
If you are working to prove your worth to others, to pay for the things you believe will signify that you have "made it" and your worth is tied to what you do, what you earn and who you know, there can never ever be balance
You will continue to search for that validation and worth from work
Balance does not require you to do anything better or faster than anyone else, it does not require you to compare your life to others
It requires that you make aconscious effort to be,to do, to rest, to work, to play and be present in those moments while you are doing it.
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Thank you For the Reminder

Wherever you go, go with all your heart. ConfuciusThis morning I had the opportunity to speak to the students at the San Juan South Secondary School's Career and Achievement Day. I must admit, speaking with teenagers terrify me, they are honest to the point of brutality, they don't pretend if they are not feeling you or getting the message
I always take the opportunity to speak to them because it pushes me over my comfort zone, I know right there and then when I have to raise my game even more than when I show up with what I think is a game changing message!
This morning did not disappoint, the energy in the room was high, they were there with me all the way guiding me to raise the game and be present in the moment. I truly learnt today how to feel comfortable with discomfort. and as soon as I surrendered to that feeling, we bacame one, the thing flowed so much, I was lauging and smiling and hollering, totally lost in the moment as opposed to me wondering if the audience was feeling me, if my face was greasy or my clothes were still in the right spot (I move around so much that things tend to move!)

Thank you San Juan South Secondary for the opportunity to share lessons on the Journey and the reminder to my own self to show up real
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Being True to Yourself is Not Easy

Being true to yourself is not always easy. For fear of not being accepted, we tailor our personality, mince our words, and carve our opinions to fit in. It takes courage to be real… and it takes stamina because if you want the best out of life, it will demand the best of you time and time again. Danielle La Porte



Sunday I had the extreme pleasure of hosting the young ladies from the NiNa Programme at the house for their birthday party
Quite a few of them have their birthday in October so it has turn into an annual event, last year we were kind enough to be given a place to use, this year the ladies decided upon a photoshoot as their birthday present.
The absolute joy for the simple things is what gets me everytime
The cake was a big deal
The ice cream was a big deal
The photos were a big deal
The KFC after was a big deal
The people who came for the lime was a big deal
A total reminder to me that it is always the simple things that count
It is always the love, It is always the love, it is always the love
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Push the Boundaries

We are inspired by people who go beyond the norm and push the boundaries of possibility. Mediocrity, on the other hand, does not inspire. Nor does it lead to greatness. Success, however you define it, will elude you unless you are willing to push the limits you have placed on yourself and that others have placed on you.”

Have you ever sat down and defined what success means for you? Not the TV version, or your parent's version, or the society's version.
Your own version of success, that you sat and thought about, that involves big dreams and being frightened at its possibilities?
If you haven't ask yourself why
Have you ever sat down and thought about staying where you are just because it is comfortable? That it allows you to pay your bills and eat?
Is it a given that you do this until "better can be done" because you have responsibilities?
If you have, ask yourself - how am I feeling?
Your feelings are the guide
If you are denying your feelings, your life will reflect the truth of what is inside
If you are feeling a sense of joy and content, your life reflects this in your attitude, in your manner, in your approach, trust me, you absolutely cannot fake it. What is inside is reflected outside
If you are feeling frustrated and angry about where you at in life it will reflect in your life
You will also have unexplained aches and pains and ailments
Your life tells you everything
And the transformation is a process, however for a process to begin one must well.....begin! One must decide!
What I have learnt is defining my own version of what success is may not be in line with what others have for me, and I have to be okay with that
I have learnt that success is not a one size fits all
it involves courage and discipline and feeling all the feelings, because they are indeed guides
I have learnt that the process may not have the same timeline as I do! and most importantly, do not ever judge the process

Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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In the End, What Matters Most to You?

“In the end these things matter most: How well did you love? How fully did you live? How deeply did you let go?” – Jack Kornfield, Buddha’s Little Instruction Book



Yesterday I attended a funeral, I did not know him very well, we crossed paths at secondary school where he taught, he went on to influence so many of my friends and became an icon in our local musical landscape. Even though I was a poor student in his music class, he always from that day whenever I saw him, smiled said hello and asked how was I doing. Everyone who spoke if him yesterday spoke of his humility, his smile and his attitude of love. He left teaching the school to go on to follow his dreams, a bold move as declared by everyone! How many of us are willing to take the risks to step out and be bold with our hopes and dreams? He did it and although it was tough he was able t influence so so many lives
I truly admired his courage and discipline
What I learned yesterday is to go for it, do it with love, do it with a smile, be authentic and your life will make a difference to someone!
Thank you Professor
May you Fly in Peace
Peace


Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Divine Timing

All things come in due season - Iyanla Vanzant

Rushing anything is a complete waste of time and effort, I truly believe in Divine Timing. And, like nature we are also subject to some of its laws. Have you ever seen the sun rush to set or to rise?
I also truly believe that our blessings have our names on it, aka, what is for you is for you! We can chose whether or not we want to go and claim it by doing the work and having the faith.
We trip ourselves up wanting things when we want it, when we want it and all indications show that it is not yet the time nor is it the thing that really is for you.
We basically force it, we force it because we want to look good and be good!
When it does not happen the way we believe it ought to happen we get depressed, angry, despondent and wonder if something is wrong with us!
Divine timing - it works.
You cannot force it, you cannot force anything, it will not last.
What is for you, you will have once, you put the work in and have faith.
and many times letting go is also part of this Divine Timing Journey.

I have learnt not to force anything, I have been working on a book tour to St Lucia all year, there have been lots of work put in, today I decided to pospone it
Forcing it is not an option
In divine timing I will go and if I don't then St Lucia ain't for the I& I!
If I do go, come out and share lessons on the Journey
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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If You Want it, Be It

You cannot have love if your heart is closed
You cannot have money if you are afraid of it
You cannot have freedom if you are unwilling to make choices
You cannot have peace if you think it means giving up something essential to your survival - One Day My Soul Just Opened Up

What you are running from you are running to
I love the line in the Course in Miracles that says whatever is lacking in a situation is because you have been unwilling to give it
If you want love, be willing to give love
If you want peace, be willing to be peace
And you can extend it to other things, the book you want to read, why not write it, the song you want to sing why not sing it?
The dress you want to wear, why not create it?

So many times our default is reasons, rationale, justification and excuses about why not!
You want to do something, you mention it but disclaim
I have no money right now
I have no friends to go with me
I have no
I cannot
It does not make sense
Talking yourself right out of the very thing you say you want to do
Why say it when you really believe it is untainable or that you will make no moves towards it?
Such a waste of words, time and effort
I have learnt that words can determine actions and beliefs so to keep them all in alignment
And when the self doubt comes, I brush up on the self talk to ensure that they get back into alignment
It takes work
It takes truth
It takes courage
It takes willingness
Are you willing
Peace

Trying is a Dark Word

Trying is a dark, dark word -  you are either do or you don't - Carolyn Myss

I pay particular attention to when I use the word try. (I think I may have mentioned before that a few have called me the "try police")
I pay attention to when I use the word because most times I use it when I am either in fear or in denial.
For example when someone asks me - Are you doing so and so? When I respond with I am trying, it usually means that I am giving it a half-assed effort and to stop the conversation I say I'm trying to show them and to justify in my mind that I am actually doing something. I really ain't doing shit but it sounds so good to say I am trying.
It also takes some pressure off of me - if I am trying and it's not working maybe I ought to stop?

I also say I am trying when I am unsure. If I am in doubt about whether I can do or complete a task.
I say I am trying to do it.

Words to me are alive, once the words are breathed into life it becomes a part of my Universe, it is so unconscious for us to say certain things without giving a second thought to it, then we wonder why certain things are happening in our lives. Granted there are many things we have absolutely no control over, nature, death, other people's behaviour and response. The things we do have a hand in, why not make it a conscious decision minus fear, guilt, rationales and justifications?
If we don't want to forgive someone yet say it - rather than "I'm trying!"
If we are not ready to eat properly and exercise say it
If we are not ready to leave a job, a relationship, a situation say it
If we are scared to start that business, say it, and wait until you are ready
When we admit it, when we are honest about it then we make room for a shift.
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Book Tour Lessons Part 2

 Nothing can bring complete contentment except the knowledge that "I am surrounded by Your Love, forever still, forever gentle and forever safe" (1:7). Today, will I pursue yet another illusion? Or will I use my time wisely, and choose Heaven and the peace of God? ACIM


The past week has been quite a whirlwind! From Barbados to Grande Riviere to Unit Trust Corporation. Through the sleep, the planes, the hotels, the mini buses, the book signings, the talks I made little time for getting still, reflecting and sharing lessons on the Journey. The next few days are also full to the brim however I made the conscious decision today to checkn in with my lovely peeps.

The book tour to Barbados was fun, I resolved to
1. To accept what is, then decide
2. To accept support without a fight or excuses
3. To make decisions and feel comfortable with it even if it was hard
4. To have fun
5. To not fret about money or the seeming lack of
6. To be present
7. To go with the flow

And let me tell you, this approach really supported me
we were running late for our radio interview as we misjudged the time it would take on public transport, I said ok self- accept what is and decide
we reached after 9am but they were not yet ready for us- perfect timing

the bookstore did not do one bit of marketing - we stepped up and ran through the store giving people an idea who we was - thank you to Denyssa for suggesting that and following through
we asked for a mic system and did an unscheduled reading at the store
go with the flow

the room was not set up or ready for us when we arrived for the last talk- we set it up, said nothing and just got on with it

Things can never ever be perfect no matter how we try to control it
Disappointment comes when we want to control all the outcomes, it also comes when the intention is not pure and when we not ready
Everything else is us wanting to play God!
And we just can't
Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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Abridged Book Tour Chronicles

Some noble paths can be discovered without getting lost - Erol Ozan


Howdy my fellow journey people!
It's been a while, the book tour became a bit of a whirlwind since the last time I touched base
I just wanted to check in really quickly to say, I had a blast, I learnt quite a few lessons and promise to share them with you soon!
Until then, stay tuned
stay cool
stay real
Peace
Akosua