Bart King's Blog, page 33

Atherton is TROUBLE

Atherton is a quiet, wealthy city in California... but its residents still fall prey to crimes! Please enjoy these selections from the Atherton police blotter:

A woman told police someone rang her doorbell but when she called out to ask who it was, no one answered. Police responded and determined the visitor had delivered a package.  

A man was reported to be sitting down and talking to himself. Police made contact and confirmed he was using a cellphone.  

A resident worried that a noisy hawk in a tree was in distress. When authorities arrived, the hawk was quiet and enjoying dinner.  

Four or five juveniles were reported to be running around at Selby Lane School and involved in “horseplay” on a summer afternoon.  

A person sitting in a vehicle outside a residence was waiting for a friend who lives there.  

A pedestrian was reported after midnight wearing black pants and a white dress shirt.  

A man was reported to be lying on the ground, possibly writing.  

A person seen walking at midday for two days in a row was contacted and determined to be using lunch breaks to get some exercise.  

Loud birds were reported. Police responded and settled the situation.  

A resident called police to report that someone had tipped over his recycling containers.  

A family reported being followed by a duck who resides on Tuscaloosa Avenue.  

A resident reported a large light in the sky. It was the moon.

REJECTED SLOGANS FOR THIS FOODTRUCK NEAR MY HOUSE:

— Stick a chicken up yo nose 

— Shove a fish in yo ear 

— Surgically implant a pork in yo pancreas

I HAVE GIFS!!!!

The following gif is tricky, because one gentleman is making rude gestures, but then gets what he deserves. What do you think? Inappropriate? Let me know if you think so, and I'll yoink it! [image error]
[image error]

This is pretty awesome.

Hey kids, math and reading are fun!

SO FUN

Sup?

Via.

Hey, this carrot is ready to bust a move!

Just drop the beet. (Thanks, yblaze!)

Dear Little Kid:

Nice shot!

IMPORTANT: Our neighbors keep a Scrabble message bowl in their front yard.

Nominee: "Mother of the Year" award!

Thought my mom was sending me a care package... but instead she sent me a box of trash i was supposed to take out. pic.twitter.com/UetdT5UoVP— Connor Cox (@thedeal_5) January 30, 2017