Bart King's Blog, page 32

Do you like magic?

I like magic! [image error] I just realized I have two posts in a row of people running into doors. Hmm. What does that say about me? (Don't answer that!)

The cool thing about the future? The doors will almost all open automatically.

*ALMOST* all!

Important!

I really like this photo. (By Nina.)

As an armchair historian, I sniff in disdain at my metal lawn chair colleagues.

"And then the murders began."

So a writer named Marc Laidlaw had an interesting idea:

The first line of almost any story can be improved by making sure the second line is, "And then the murders began."— Marc Laidlaw (@marc_laidlaw) March 3, 2017

Let's try it out! Here's a few beginnings that you might recognize:

“I wonder what Piglet is doing," thought Pooh. And then the murders began.
 —————————One sunny Sunday, the caterpillar was hatched out of a tiny egg. He was very hungry. And then the murders began.
  —————————"Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents," grumbled Jo, lying on the rug. And then the murders began.
  —————————"Where's Papa going with that axe?” said Fern to her mother. And then the murders began.
  —————————Imagine you’re in a dark room. And then the murders began. 

(Okay, I sort of cheated. That last one was from THE DRAKE EQUATION!)

It's slightly windy in Minnesota

What Minnesota was like the last couple days pic.twitter.com/igWiDm2hnt— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) March 9, 2017

Something to think about

Since the sun is also moving, this is a better representation of how the planets revolve around the sun. pic.twitter.com/2GkP4rLSSO— Roberto A. González (@robertoglezcano) March 4, 2017

This is funny!

So someone named lieutenantrizawrote this:

My favorite thing I’ve learned in college is that way back in ancient China there was this poet/philosopher guy who wrote this whole pretentious poem about how enlightened he was, and how “the eight winds cannot move me.”

He was really proud of it so he sent it to his friend who lived across the lake. And then his friend just writes “FART” (in Chinese) on it, and sends it back. And the poet was SO MAD he travels across the lake to chew his friend out and when he gets there his friend says, “Wow. The eight winds cannot move you, but one fart sends you across the lake.”

And then Asterion wrote:

I Googled this because I desperately wanted this to be real, and guess what…it is. The poet’s name was Su Dongpo, and his original poem went like this: 

 稽首天中天， 

毫光照大千， 

八風吹不動， 

端坐紫金蓮  

(Humbly bowed my head below all skies/Minutest lights shine through my deepest bounds/Immovable by strong winds from eight sides/Upon purplish gold lotus I seated straightly by the low mound)

Then his friend wrote “放屁” (fart) on it, and you know the rest.

THE DRAKE EQUATION: Better than French toast!

Via.

"There are farts everywhere, and toots!"

Pick this up at about 15 seconds in!