E.J. Divitt's Blog, page 9

Free Today

"I'm Engaged! Now What?" is free for about another 24 hours at amazon.com. Wedding planning: What to do? This is the guide to get you through.

http://www.amazon.com/Im-Engaged-Now-...

33% off Thurs, Fri and Sat only: Things Every Goddess Should Know

Things Every Goddess Should Know . . . And We Are All Goddesses is on sale for the next 3 days (7/28, 7/29 and 7/30) for 67% off on ebook at Amazon. 

Update:  TEGSK is on sale for 33% off 7/31, 8/1 and 8/2 on ebook at Amazon. It goes back to full price on 8/3. (Amazon only gives us a limited number of sales and this is my last one. )

http://amzn.com/B00HJEAWLM

This is you chance to own it for less then the cost of a cup of coffee.  

Have you ever read Greek mythology? Athena, Artemis and Aphrodite were just some of the goddesses. They were incredibly powerful, beautiful and often petty and mistake prone. They were still goddesses.

I have long believed that being a woman means we have the potential to be a force of nature. You are beautiful. You are strong in ways that most men do not even understand. You are a goddess in training.

Full of advice and hints covering a variety of topics including self improvement, love, money, relationships and many more. Because being a goddess is not about being perfect . . .

Order now in ebook and start reading instantly or in paperback and use the Kindle Match Book to get a free copy of the ebook while you wait for the paperback.

67% off Mon, Tues and Wed only: Things Every Goddess Should Know

Things Every Goddess Should Know . . . And We Are All Goddesses is on sale for the next 3 days (7/28, 7/29 and 7/30) for 67% off on ebook at Amazon. 

http://amzn.com/B00HJEAWLM

This is you chance to own it for less then the cost of a cup of coffee.  

Have you ever read Greek mythology? Athena, Artemis and Aphrodite were just some of the goddesses. They were incredibly powerful, beautiful and often petty and mistake prone. They were still goddesses.

I have long believed that being a woman means we have the potential to be a force of nature. You are beautiful. You are strong in ways that most men do not even understand. You are a goddess in training.

Full of advice and hints covering a variety of topics including self improvement, love, money, relationships and many more. Because being a goddess is not about being perfect . . .

Order now in ebook and start reading instantly or in paperback and use the Kindle Match Book to get a free copy of the ebook while you wait for the paperback.

Only 99 Cents For 3 More Days

Things Every Goddess Should Know . . . And We Are All Goddesses is on sale for the next 3 days  for only 99 cents on ebook at Amazon. 

http://amzn.com/B00HJEAWLM

This is you chance to own it for less then the cost of a cup of coffee.  

Have you ever read Greek mythology? Athena, Artemis and Aphrodite were just some of the goddesses. They were incredibly powerful, beautiful and often petty and mistake prone. They were still goddesses.

I have long believed that being a woman means we have the potential to be a force of nature. You are beautiful. You are strong in ways that most men do not even understand. You are a goddess in training.

Full of advice and hints covering a variety of topics including self improvement, love, money, relationships and many more. Because being a goddess is not about being perfect . . .

Order now in ebook and start reading instantly or in paperback and use the Kindle Match Book to get a free copy of the ebook while you wait for the paperback.

5 More Youtube Videos Worth Seeing

Teaser for upcoming Nightwing Series.

This is a fan made miniseries that is going straight to Youtube. Filming has finished and they are working on the special effects. I love Nightwing as a character and I love the passion and effort that went into making this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvvvEK_6_fk


Two Cellos play Smooth Criminal

Two very enthusiastic cellists demonstrate what happens when you let go and have a little fun with your playing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mx0xCI1jaUM


Shots of Awe  "Love is the Greatest Pain"

This is a very short video; only 2 or 3 minutes. It has beautiful imagery and in the end makes me a little sad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYwrkzNtlgI

Pandas Learning How To Use A Slide

What else is there to say? Adorable pandas learning the joy of using the slide.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=863000880396701

Epic Rap Battles of History  (Newton vs Nye)

If Sir Isaac Newton and Bill Nye the Science Guy met and used rap to decide who was the better scientist. I would recommend checking out other rap battles as well such as Key and Peele's Ghandi vs Martin Luther King Jr.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yis7GzlXNM

10 Things I Wish I Knew Sooner

I didn't have to stay. When I was younger, I felt trapped in a mess that I did not make. I know now that I did not have to stay. I deserved better.

I should trust my gut/intuition/sixth sense. My gut said to go but I rationalized it away. I often find myself fighting my first initial instinct. I should trust myself more.

I am not responsible for the actions of others; even those close to me.   People often expected me to apologize for the actions of a relative. I would feel guilty and apologize but now that I am older I realize that I was not responsible. People should not have tried to make me be responsible for her.

I don't have to live to the expectations of others. My mother wanted me to be a lawyer. I wanted to be an writer. I ended up in insurance. It is only a couple of years ago that I started considering doing what I wanted to do.

Too much worrying is bad for my health and my heart.  Worry keeps you up nights. It causes ulcers and ruins your mood. It is unhealthy and generally unproductive as the things I worry about rarely come to pass. 

Fear of the unknown is fear of nothing. I have failed to try things. Failed to go places. Failed to change because of what might happen.  What about what I might miss?

Someone will love me for me and someone will hate me for no reason. I have met people who hated me on sight and people who loved me on sight. The important people--the ones that mattered--that ultimately shaped me and supported me, were the ones who got to know me and liked me for what I am.

Equal is not the same as fair.  My mother had many children and she kept things simple by giving us the same bed time; the same rules. This was not fair. We were different ages; we were different people.  I have seen this repeated through out my life in other places; other reasons. I do not try so hard to be equal. I try to be fair.

People die. This is something I knew in abstract but it is completely different when someone you love dies. It cuts into you and leaves a hole. I do not want to look back and wonder if someone knew I loved them. It is better to make sure they know. On a practical note, it is better to plan as well--life insurance, a will, etc. Who will take your kids?

Time does not heal all wounds fully; some leave scars.  I will never get over the death of my sisters. I will forever think of my father. But time does mute the edges. The hole shrinks. It never closes completely but the edges don't cut so badly. I can think of good memories and smile. Some times I still cry though.  Wounds fade. Scars remain.

My Top 5 Favorite Youtube Videos

Because in life it is important to have fun and be informed, here are some of my favorite Youtube videos.

1) Literal Music Video-- Total Eclipse of the Heart
What if music videos told us what was actually going on?  I love this one because it embraces the randomness of music videos and runs with it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsgWUq0fdKk

2) Brian Williams from NBC Nightly News raps "Baby Got Back"

I can't help but think the people at the Late Show have too much time on their hands but I love what they did with it. The pasted together clips from NBC Nightly News until Brian Williams is rapping.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wpd2VaFt5iY

3) Solar Freakin Roadways

What if the roads we travelled on were also our source of energy? I love the idea of roads that we don't have to plow. Roads that make energy.  And the announcer gets so excited that it is fun to watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlTA3rnpgzU

4) My Body Belongs To Me

A video for kids to help warn them about sexual abuse. I do not love this one the way I love the other videos but I love that some one made it and I hope it is helping kids.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-5mdt9YN6I

5) Dumb Ways To Day

This is a train safety video but it makes me laugh. I had no idea that cute little cartoon characters could find so many dumb ways to die.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJNR2EpS0jw

Remembering To Remember And To Forget

Today is the anniversary of my sister's death. It's funny but some years the day passes and I do not even realize it and other years, it seems like this big shadow looming over me.

For what ever reason, this year is harder than last year. I have no idea why. I can not point to any one thing that makes her be in my mind. She just is.

Losing some one you love is one of the hardest things you have to face as a human being. It is one of the great defining moments; an unforgettable road mark on the map of my life.  When I am trying to remember when an event occurred, I often think, "Well, it was before J died but after L . . ." or some version of it.

Time dulls the edges; makes it easier to remember with a smile and less with tears but the tears are never completely gone.

When she first died, I would forget sometimes. I would hear a song and think I should play it for her or see a movie trailer and think I should take her to it.  Then I would remember and it was like getting a sudden punch in the gut.

I like remembering her though. I like telling stories of antics from younger years like the time she was a toddler and climbed to the top of the Christmas tree sending it crashing down to the living room floor. Ornaments every where; presents that had to be re wrapped.  Or the time I saw My Big Fat Greek Wedding and it was so funny that I went back the next weekend just so she could see it.

When Star Wars was re-released in theaters, we went and saw all 3 together. Those memories make me smile. 

The ones of her lying in a hospital bed half out of it, fading away, do not.

I need to remember to remember the good memories and I need to remember to forget the bad because I would not trade the time I had with her on this Earth even to avoid the pain.

Cows With Names Give More Milk

Lessons for Managers from Those They Manage
Remember your employees names. We are vital parts of your company’s every day function. You literally could not run without us. The building needs to be cleaned, the reports need to be typed, the customers need to be helped and the shelves need to be stocked. More importantly, we are human beings who need to be recognized. There could be no upper management without the service staff.The customer is Not always right. No one is always right—not the customer, not the manager and not the staff.Support your employees. Do not automatically assume they are in the wrong. Find out what is going on before you come down on someone. And think about your employees—if a customer says someone was swearing at them and you have never heard this person use a swear word in 10 years take that into account. Did they really start yelling, "F***  You", when the worst they ever say is crap?If you have to break up a disagreement or assuage a customer, don’t assume the person yelling is the one who is right. Some people yell because they are frustrated and legitimately right and some people yell because they are lying and trying to distract you. Some people default to yelling without even realizing they are doing it.Employee morale is always going to be an issue you need to work on. Improving it or keeping it up; it is an ongoing battle. Morale can be vastly improved by a kind word. I once worked for a boss that every time I said good night, he said, “Good night. Thank you.” I will always remember him and that feeling of appreciation went a long way towards keeping me going when a lot of other things were bad there.Every one has a bad day now and then; be willing to overlook the small things if they don’t matter. Understand when they do. An employee should respect your authority. If you tell her that her outfit is not appropriate, she should never wear it again. If she does, sit her down and find out what is going on. Then send her home to change and count it as her sick time. If it happens again, send them home with no pay or write them up.Never yell at your employees. And absolutely never yell in front of any one else. It is demoralizing.A happy employee will always provide better service than a sullen one.You owe your employees something and I don’t mean money. Having said that you do owe them money as well so always pay your employees on schedule.Have a way to keep track of time off and make sure you don’t over or under schedule. It is OK to expect them to find coverage for their shift if they ask for time off at the last minute but if they ask for the time off in advance then it is your responsibility to find the proper coverage.Take the time to learn the basics about your employees. You don’t need to know the name of every one they have ever dated but you should know if they are married or have kids (Just do not ask in the interview).A study of milk producing cows showed that overwhelmingly cows with names give more milk. The cows that received personal attention were the ones that produced the best. We aren't cows and do not want to be treated as though we were, but there is still something to be learned here.Its all about recognition respect and attention REFERENCE: "Exploring Stock Managers' Perceptions of the Human-Animal Relationship on Dairy Farms and an Association with Milk Production," Catherine Bertenshaw [Douglas] and Peter Rowlinson,

Why Can't I Put My Elbows On The Table?

Have you ever wondered where an etiquette rule came from or why we bother to have it? Etiquette customs evolve from real life issues at the time. 

The habit of clinking glasses came from a time when people used sturdy pewter mugs. When drinking with a stranger or an enemy, you would all crash your mugs hard into each other and deliberately send a spray of drink splashing all over each others mugs.  This was a precaution against being poisoned as the poison could end up being distributed back into the villain's own mug.

The reason you are not supposed to put your elbows on the table is that people often ate in large groups sitting cramped together on long wooden benches at long wooden tables. No one had enough room as it was, so putting your elbows on the table just made things even more cramped. It meant you were inconsiderate and selfish if you did.

I'm sure you know that the knife goes on the right side of the placing setting. Do you know that the blade should be facing the plate? This goes back again to where people were often crammed together with strangers. You would face the knife away from the other person in order to avoid some one getting accidentally cut. It was considered a sign of aggression if you let your blade face them. Remember this was back before the advent of such things as dull butter knives.

Fancy napkin rings where invented not to beautify a table but rather to reduce laundry. Family members would reuse the same cloth napkin at multiple meals and the napkin rings helped identify who had used that napkin prior.

I remember as a child asking my father why he always walked on the outside of the sidewalk nearest the street while keeping my mother on the inside. He told me that it went back to when he was a teenager. The male walked on the outside to protect the female from being splashed from the road. It was also a way to tell the other men that this woman was under your protection or with you. When I asked him what you did when you had two women with you, he winked at me and said, "Well then you put the one you don't want on the outside and see if some other fellow wants to come take her off your hands."