R.J. Blain's Blog, page 48

2020/2021 Schedule Updates. It is Wednesday, the 15th of Mapray, the Year of Grave Humor. (If you’re really confused about the month, it’s April.)

Dear humans,

Grave Humor lurks on the horizon. The female checked on the preorders for it today. We are officially at the if the release week goes exceptionally well, there is a chance the book might make it to USA Today stage of the game. As such, she is putting together an ad campaign for the book. Honestly, shes not expecting much, but shes going to try. There is something to be said about trying.

If you dont try, you automatically fail. So, she is going to try.

If you spot the book on...

We made a small oops with our PO Box. Zip Code is 95015.

Were sorry, humans.

Finger training had us use our home zip code rather than the PO Boxs zip code. Here is the correct address:

RJ Blain / Pen & Page Publishing
PO Box 2663
Cupertino, CA 95015

We have put ourselves in the corner and fixed the post. Thank you for the nice comment telling us we screwed the pooch!

A Letter From the Author: Want one?

Dear humans,

Those who use facebook (and follow the page) already know the female Has Opinions on the USPS, its status as an essential service, and so on. The female has decided that she is taking action.

She bought stamps, and she will use these stamps to mail letters and cards to fans in June of 2020. In fact, she bought almost $400 in stamps for this purpose.

If everyone buys even a single roll of the $11 stamps from the USPS, We the People will succeed where our government has failed.

...

April 11, 2020: Bonds sale ends tomorrow, some stuff about print editions. Newsish stuff.

Dear humans,

We meant to do this yesterday, but life happened. The female became busy picking a fight with Grave Humor, and the allergies struck again, this time bringing a rash. The rash has mostly cleared up after taking allergy medications. Keyword: mostly.

Please enjoy this picture of me taking a nap with my sister. On my sister. I do enjoy my naps.

We meant to do a lengthy Q&A yesterday and today but the female has a great deal she must do, so were going to do this quick and dirty...

State of the Blain Address: Let’s talk about Scheduling, Humans! (It’s a Thursday, for those of you who need a reminder. Like the female.)

Dear humans,

As most of you are aware, the female has a somewhat meticulous approach to how she handles her scheduling. She needs to write certain books to survive: see Magical Romantic Comedies (with a body count.) Readers buy what they want to read, and that is her top selling series.

The Royal States series is quickly catching up, which is a fantastic thing. It gives the female variety, all of her eggs arent in one basket, and she really loves the Royal States series. Really loves it....

April 7, 2020: It’s Tuesday, there are some fun, games, and giveaways inside, Bonds is on sale for $0.99.

Dear humans. We can has a tired.

Its a big tired.

The Royal States series is being rebranded, and Im so thrilled to show you the covers so far. Here they are!

A Guiding Light and Huntress are up next, and the female will be able to begin earnest work on Runaway, as shell have the cover for that by the end of the month. The Agents of the Royal States series will also be put into the general lineup.

The first book will be titled The Vampire of Montana.

Bonds is now on sale for $0.99 and can be...

April 6, 2020: For those trapped in the stay-at-home time warp, it’s Monday.

Be fabulous like this peacock. Monday need not be rainy and dreary! (In other news, Monday is rainy and dreary. The females knee is majorly ouchy, and we wont talk about her case of tennis elbow.

Life hurts right now. Itll be better later after the Motrin kicks in.

The female is in the final stages of proofreading The Run Around. Hooray! For a rare change, the print editions might be ready at the same time as the digital version. We shall see! I mean, you may have difficulties ordering...

April 3, 2020: The female made a pie. Didn’t die. It was originally frozen. Please judge her.

Last week, the male really, really, really wanted to order a CostCo ham dinner, so badly that the female asked a friend to buy it for them and ship it using her CostCo card. The male and female dont have a CostCo card at current.

Their apartment is too small for bulk anything. The ham dinner came with a pie. The female ate the pie for dinner last night. She is happy.

The male didnt want pie.

Judge the entire human portion of the Blain household, please.

In other news, the male made the female...

April 2, 2020: Book Talk, Life talk, the female is a little sick. Poor female.

Dear Humans,

The female has been playing a daily game. Its fun. We call it Allergies or Plague.

Symptoms of allergies: Coughing, sore throat, sinus issues, aching, sometimes fever when theyre reaaaalllyyy bad, and so on.

Symptoms of plague: see above.

Not all people with all allergies express allergies in the same way. The female just happens to mimic someone with COVID very well. According to Apples new COVID-19 app, she probably has the plague, and she should go see a doctor.

Note: She...

April 1, 2020: No pranks, only book news. (We’re tired today, humans.)

Dear humans,

One of my favorite hobbies includes climbing onto the females desk and trying to steal things. I do this approximately two or three times a month, after giving sufficient time to lower her defenses.

How annoying I am about it is directly related to how hungry I am when I stage my assault of her professional life.

We are supposed to be recommending a book today, but were really tired, and our brain keeps going bwuh? bwuh? What are books? Why we book?

The female is proofreading...