Lisa Niver's Blog: We Said Go Travel, page 20

Brave-ish wins Literary Titan Gold Book Award

Brave-ish is a WINNER of the Literary Titan Gold Book Award

The Literary Titan Book Award honors authors who turn complex topics into engaging narratives, enriching our understanding with top-quality writing and research.

Literary Titan Gold Book Award ��� Nonfiction: The Literary Titan Book Award recognizes outstanding nonfiction books that demonstrate exceptional quality in writing, research, and presentation. This award is dedicated to authors who excel in creating informative, enlightening, and engaging works that offer valuable insights. Recipients of this award are commended for their ability to transform complex topics into accessible and compelling narratives that captivate readers and enhance our understanding.

Celebrating excellence in #nonfiction! The Literary Titan Book Award honors #authors who turn complex topics into engaging narratives, enriching our understanding with top-quality #writing and research. #BookLovers #WritingCommunityhttps://t.co/627Cxwuiih pic.twitter.com/iFWPTGGDsa

— Literary Titan (@LiteraryTitan) April 5, 2024

AWARDS for BRAVE-ish

2024 Literary Titan Non-fiction Gold Book Award
2023 Zibby Awards Runner-up: Best Book for The Strong Woman
2023 HEARTEN Book Awards Finalist for Inspiring & Uplifting Non-Fiction
2023 WINNER: Goody Business Book Awards: Memoir/Self-Help
Featured in Conde Nast Traveler Women Who Travel Book Club: 10 New Books We Can’t Wait to Read this Fall
As seen in Forbes Best New NonFiction

Thank you to Literary Titan for this marvelous 5 star review of my memoir!

Brave-ish by Lisa Niver is an engaging memoir that masterfully interweaves the challenging dynamics of a marriage at a crossroads with vivid accounts of solo travel and self-exploration. The narrative transports readers from the lively streets of Thailand to Fiji���s serene landscapes and into the opulent heart of Monaco, all while offering an introspective look at Niver���s personal journey.

In Brave-ish, Lisa Niver emerges as a relatable figure, akin to a close friend who has weathered significant challenges yet maintains a sense of humor. Her candor in discussing the emotional aftermath of her marriage and the subsequent steps toward recovery is both striking and inspiring. The memoir goes beyond the excitement of adventures like shark diving and car racing in Vegas, framing these experiences as pivotal moments in Niver���s path to healing. While the memoir at times delves deeply into the emotional aspects of her life, potentially overshadowing the more light-hearted, travel-centric narratives, it is precisely this vulnerability that lends authenticity to her story. The book skillfully blends reflective thought with the excitement of global exploration. Niver doesn���t just pass through destinations; she fully immerses herself in them, extracting meaningful insights from each experience, whether confronting fears or embracing different cultures. She is the approachable protagonist of her own story, exemplifying that true bravery often lies in perseverance.

Brave-ish is an invitation to confront the unfamiliar, to discover resilience in openness. Lisa Niver���s memoir is not only a revealing journey into her own experiences but also a reflective look at the adventurous spirit that resides within us all. It appeals to anyone drawn to the unknown and serves as a poignant reminder that often, the most significant adventures are those that take place within ourselves.

When a womans marriage falls aprart she makes a choice try 50 new things before turning 50. Brave-ish is an engaging #memoir that interweaves the challenging dynamics of a #marriage at a crossroads with vivid accounts of solo #travel and self-exploration. https://t.co/rETnzyHQEP pic.twitter.com/jzuMRFu5up

— Literary Titan (@LiteraryTitan) March 8, 2024

Click here for more about BRAVE-ish and Lisa Niver

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Although Lisa Niver has traveled in far-off locales from Vanuatu to Nepal and received numerous accolades for both her writing and her top ranked website, what people don���t realize is that this began from the wreckage of a rotten romance.

Newlywed Niver was on the adventure of a lifetime. She had quit her job, rented out her condo, and was traveling around Asia. To the outside world, Niver was a woman living out her dreams of exploring ancient ruins in Cambodia and seeing orangutans in Borneo. In private, she was keeping a dark secret. But, when she found herself lying on a sidewalk in Thailand, looking up at the sky in severe pain, she knew things had to change. At age forty-seven, Niver found the courage to set course on a new life.

Feeling like a failure, pushing fifty, and moving home to her parents��� house to start again from scratch, Niver started taking one tiny ���brave-ish��� step at a time to take her life far away from the old one and into the adventurous world of travel writing. These small hurdles led to the challenge of trying fifty new things before turning fifty. From diving into shipwrecks, swimming with sharks, bobsledding at 3 Gs, to indulging in wild escapades, Niver found herself traversing the world on a journey of reinvention, personal growth, and discovering what it actually means to be ���brave.���

While Brave-ish chronicles Niver���s inspiring expeditions to distant corners of the world including Myanmar, Cuba, Morocco, Kenya and Mongolia this is more than a travelogue. Niver���s story is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the power of perseverance. Brave-ish inspires readers to dream big, take risks, and embrace the unknown to create a life filled with wonder and excitement, even when courage seems elusive.

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Shabbat Prayer for Our College Students and Ourselves

Shabbat Shalom. I have always loved to participate at Stephen Wise Temple. Since Oct 7, for 210 days, I have been praying for the hostages, for our people and for peace. Thank you to Rabbi Yoshi and Cantor Emma for their leadership and these prayers:

Shabbat Prayer for Our College Students, Faculty, and Staff

by Rabbi Yoshi Zweiback, Senior Rabbi at Stephen Wise Temple

A Prayer for Our College Students, Faculty, and Staff

God, Shomer Yisrael (Protector of Israel), in this time of chaos when so many members of our Jewish community are feeling afraid, isolated, vulnerable and targeted, we humbly ask for Your mercy, guidance, and help. Keep our students, faculty, and staff safe in body and spirit on college campuses near and far. Protect us from vitriol, bigotry, ignorance, hate, and violence.

God, Source of Wisdom and Understanding, make our institutions of higher learning places where we can engage without fear in Machlokot L���shem Shamayim (disagreements for the sake of heaven). When we argue with others, with members of Am Yisrael, or even with You, help us always to choose our words with care and kindness.

Grace us with empathy and humility so that we might stand up proudly for what we believe in without vilifying or dehumanizing those with whom we disagree, recognizing always that You created our fellow students, colleagues, and neighbors B���Tzelem Elohim (in Your image) as well.

May we have the patience necessary to embody the value of Dan L���Khaf Zechut, judging one another favorably, in every interaction and encounter, even the difficult ones.

May we have the power to control our passions so that our anger, hurt, and disappointment will never erupt into hate-speech or violence.

No matter how challenging, implant within us the strength and resilience to always speak out for what is right and to advocate for what is just.

And God, please shine Your countenance upon us so that we may know Your most precious blessing: the gift of wholeness and peace, the gift of Shalom.

Over the past few weeks, our community shared multiple occasions when our children led us in prayer. Singing has always been my main pathway to prayer, but listening to our learned children skillfully lead us in worship has become equally as connective for me. From the beautiful Passover performance by our third graders (including an unparalleled Israeli rendition of ���Am Yisrael Chai���) to hearing our elementary students and teens teach and chant Torah at our Passover morning service, to the extraordinary leading of the Four Questions at our community Second Night Seder, the youth of our Wise community are skilled in song. It is an absolute privilege and joy to listen to them lead our community in prayer and to learn from them.

Why WE need Prayer

From Cantor Emma Lutz, Senior Cantor, Stephen Wise Temple

I don���t for one minute take for granted the benefit of being able to connect to prayer. These past almost seven months have been a living nightmare of war, and fear can certainly cause us to close our hearts to prayer and other pathways of connection. But I have to tell you that nothing in the world makes me feel more hope than praying with our community. When we lift our voices in song together, we create a network of strength, joy, and meaning together. Whether praying in person on our campus or connecting to our worship from home, I hope that you experience that same powerful connection.

I love this alternative prayer from our siddur, Mishkan T���filah, that we use on Shabbat and festivals. I pray that you will also find inspiration from these words and that you will make an effort to join us in worship and song as soon and as often as you can.

I begin with a prayer of gratitude for all that is holy in my life.
God needs no words, no English or Hebrew, no semantics or services.
But I need them.
Through prayer, I can sense my inner strength, my inner purpose,
My inner joy, my capacity to love.
As I reach upward in prayer, I sense these qualities in my Creator.
To love God is to love each other, to work to make our lives better.
To love God is to love the world God created and to work to perfect it.
To love God is to love reams of peace and joy that illumine all of us,��
And to bring that vision to life. Amen.

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Dreamy Delights: Westin Unveils Next-Gen Heavenly Bed for Ultimate Rest & Rejuvenation

Photos: Westin Hotels & Resorts

Building upon its legacy of delivering deep, restorative sleep for guests, Westin Hotels & Resorts proudly announces the launch of its next generation Heavenly�� Bed. As a travel expert who cherishes the importance of a good night’s sleep, I couldn’t be more thrilled about this exciting development. Having personally experienced the unparalleled comfort of the Heavenly Bed during my stays at Westin properties, including the Westin New Orleans where I stayed when I was a speaker at the 2023 DEMA Dive Show and the Westin O’Hare when I was a speaker for the 2024 Chicago Travel and Adventure Show, I’ve often dreamed of bringing that heavenly sleep experience to my own home.

Recognizing the pivotal role of quality sleep in overall wellness, Westin has long championed the importance of restorative rest for travelers. Today, more than ever, individuals prioritize a rejuvenating night’s sleep as an integral part of their travel experience. This shift has fueled a surge in demand for enhanced sleep solutions, with the sleep sector projected to surpass $400 billion by 2028. It’s no wonder that the Heavenly Bed has garnered such a devoted fanbase over the years.

Brian Povinelli, Senior Vice President and Global Head of Marketing and Brand at Marriott International, reflects on Westin’s commitment to excellence: “Our legacy Heavenly Bed stands as a testament to our dedication to providing unparalleled comfort for guests worldwide. In a world that often glorifies busyness, Westin recognizes that quality sleep is fundamental to overall well-being. With the introduction of our next generation Heavenly Bed, we aim to surpass the expectations of our loyal guests and set a new benchmark for comfort.“

Westin’s meticulous development process for the next generation Heavenly Bed involved extensive product testing, consumer feedback sessions, and research into evolving sleep technologies. The result is a top-of-the-line product boasting a modernized design and an unwavering commitment to enhancing the Westin Sleep Well experience. From the innovative silver fiber weave to the temperature-regulating gel-infused memory foam, every aspect of the mattress is designed to optimize sleep quality.

In addition to its superior comfort, the next generation Heavenly Bed showcases a contemporary aesthetic, reflecting Westin’s design ethos. Updates such as the inclusion of a charcoal blanket and full-frame piping on pillowcases evoke a warm, residential ambiance, while the removal of the bed skirt and bolster pillow underscores a more modern sleep experience.

But Westin’s commitment to guest well-being doesn’t end there. Through partnerships with Strava and the Westin Store, travelers like myself can now bring the Heavenly Bed experience home. As someone who values quality sleep as much as I do, I’m excited about the opportunity to win my own Heavenly Bed and bedding.

Beyond its exceptional sleep offerings, Westin continues to lead the industry in holistic wellness programming through its Six Pillars of Well-Being. Whether you enjoy the Westin Eat Well Menu like me or you chose to explore a new city with a WestinWORKOUT Route, there are so many ways Westin is ready to support traveler’s well-being.

With the launch of the next generation Heavenly Bed, Westin reaffirms its commitment to providing guests with transformative experiences that nurture the body, mind, and spirit. I wish you a truly restful and rejuvenating stay at Westin Hotels & Resorts like I have enjoyed.

Move Well to Sleep Well with Strava: Seize the opportunity to secure a next generation Heavenly Bed of your own as part of the brand���s exclusive hospitality partnership with Strava, the leading digital community for active people. The challenge, which runs from May 1-31, 2024, invites all U.S.-based Strava users and Marriott Bonvoy members to complete 600 minutes of activity throughout the month in order to be entered for the chance to win the grand prize of a next generation Westin Heavenly Bed. Westin will be giving away ten beds, worth over$20,000, making this the largest-ever giveaway in a Strava challenge. As the newest iteration of the acclaimed RunWESTIN�� program, the brand partnership invites active travelers to test out the new digital WestinWORKOUT�� Routes with a complimentary 90-day subscription to the Strava service, available to both new and existing Strava users.

Sleep Well at Home with the Westin Store Sweepstakes: The next generation Heavenly Bed and bedding is now available for purchase through the Westin Store, which includes the mattress, linens, signature blanket, firm and soft pillows, duvet cover and insert. To celebrate its arrival, Westin Store is hosting a sweepstakes where you can enter for the chance to win your choice of the Heavenly Bed or a two-night stay at a Westin hotel. The sweepstakes is live now through July 31, 2024.

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Spring Speaking and Skiing: Niver’s April News 2024

April News 2024 with Lisa Niver & We Said Go Travel:

Thank you so much for all of your support for my writing, my website, my memoir, my videos! My book, Brave-ish, has been winning awards and I have had the chance to speak at so many events in the last six months. I am planning more!! Please invite me to speak in your city, bookstore, business about my 50 DARES before 50 and how you can take SMALL STEPS which lead to BIG CHANGES!

You can find my book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Simon & Schuster, Post Hill Press, Target, Walmart, BookShop, BAM! and wherever you get your audiobooks! People always ask me where is it best to buy my book. I recommend you go into or call your favorite local book store and ask them to order it for you and pick it up IN THE STORE! You never know what other treasures you will find. Any bookstore can order my book because my publisher is Post Hill Press and it is distributed by Simon and Schuster. My friend in New Zealand just ordered my book to her local store! Brave-ish is available all over the globe!

Happy birthday to my Mom Our family celebrated together under the shimmering lights and fountains of Las Vegas. Here���s to another year of treasured memories, laughter, and love with the woman who means the world to us. https://youtube.com/shorts/t5W25zbgDIQ

In this season of Spring and Passover, I continue to hope and pray for the hostages to return to Israel. As we said, “Let My People GO!” at our seder, I wait for it to be true. I hope that all of our college students will feel safe on campus and that there will be peace in our world. https://www.instagram.com/p/C6FPL1tPMTn/

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Have you seen me on TV talking about “Becoming Brave and Fearless Over 50” —click here or watch below for many different TV segments about my BOOK! It was my honor to speak in Salt Lake City at the Women in Travel Summit. Our panel was called: JOURNEYS OF THE SOUL: NAVIGATING THE PATH TO A BOOK DEAL. I loved being in Utah this season for the conference and I went skiing in Utah at Park City Mountain and Deer Valley several times this season. I also signed my book at the Park City Library AND went to visit at Artworks PC where my ceramic art used to be on display and for sale on Main Street. Several of my 50 DARES BEFORE 50 in my book happened in Park City! (https://www.instagram.com/p/C5v2cNbu400)

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Learn more about my events: click here and my articles here THANK YOU for watching my podcast! It has now been seen and heard in 44 countries on 6 continents!

USA   India Canada   Ireland Puerto Rico   UK    Italy   Australia  Philippines Singapore   New Zealand Portugal Saudi Arabia Switzerland Hong Kong    Mexico   Japan  Fiji Seychelles France Latvia   Netherlands   Kenya   UAE Cambodia Israel Guatemala Germany Uruguay Bangladesh Spain Panama Thailand Uganda    Greece   South Africa  Costa Rica  Bosnia and Herzegovina   Sri LankaRomania Pakistan Ghana  Slovenia Cayman Islands

WATCH my podcast, “MAKE YOUR OWN MAP: Are YOU ready to be BRAVE?” on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music, YouTube Podcast,  Google Podcasts, Audacy, Audible, Anchor, Pandora & iHeart Radio

WHERE CAN YOU FIND MY TRAVEL VIDEOS?

Here is the link to��my video channel on��YouTube where I have over TWO MILLION views on YouTube! (now at: 2,120,000).

Thank you for your support! Are you one of my 4,270 subscribers? I hope you will join me and subscribe! For more We Said Go Travel articles, TV segments, videos and social media: CLICK HERE

Find me on social media with over 150,000 followers. Please follow  on TikTok: @LisaNiver, Twitter at @LisaNiver, Instagram @LisaNiver and on Facebook, Pinterest, YouTube, and at LisaNiver.com.

My Podcast: “Make Your Own Map!”

Fortune Cookie SAID:

“As the seasons change, let the blooming flowers inspire your soul to blossom. Embrace the beauty of spring and let it awaken new beginnings within you.”

Do you love audiobooks? My memoir, Brave-ish, is available! AND!!! I am the narrator! Did you know that authors have to audition to narrate their books?!!?

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BRAVE-ish on ReachTV Where Next!

Thank you to WHERE NEXT? with Kelly Blanco on ReachTV for inviting me to talk about my favorite trips and my award-winning memoir, Brave-ish: One Breakup, Six Continents and Feeling Fearless After Fifty.Kelly and Lisa discussed her 50 DARES BEFORE 50 after her divorce featured in her award-winning memoir.

CHALLENGES INCLUDE:
Skiing with a skier who is blind at Park City Mountain with the National Ability Center. Learn more in my article for The Sierra Club and of course in my BOOK!

For my 50th challenge I went sky diving! Lisa and Kelly talked about HULA HOOPING around the world including in Kenya in Vanuatu MOST SUPRISING LOCATION: MONGOLIA FAVORITE DESTINATION: Underwater SCUBA DIVING!Kelly Blanco said: “Lisa Niver–one of the most inspirational and popular travel influencers on the planet!” –watch the whole segment: CLICK HERE!

Lisa Niver has been featured on ReachTV, the largest in-airport TV network in the United States, to discuss travel and hula hooping on WHERE NEXT with Kelly Blanco. Niver was has also a judge for the 2023 Business Traveler Awards. Niver has also shared on Instagram that hula hoops are a travel hack for staying fit on the go.

ReachTV: “Who says hula hoops are just for kids? @lisaniver proves they���re the ultimate travel hack for staying fit on the go! Don���t miss out on her incredible travel tips and more on our show #WhereNext, exclusively on #reachtv in airports worldwide.”

Did you know I travel with a hula-hoop? Learn more from REACH TV:

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Get your copy of BRAVE-ish: click here and learn more about the paperback, digital and audiobook.

2024 Literary Titan Non-fiction Gold Book Award
2023 Zibby Awards Runner-up: Best Book for The Strong Woman
2023 HEARTEN Book Awards Finalist for Inspiring & Uplifting Non-Fiction
2023 WINNER: Goody Business Book Awards: Memoir/Self-Help
Featured in Conde Nast Traveler Women Who Travel Book Club: 10 New Books We Can’t Wait to Read this Fall
As seen in��Forbes��Best New NonFiction

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Passover 2024: The Four Difficulties

Today is Shabbat HaGadol which marks that the Passover seder is soon to start. Rabbi Yoshi shares about the four questions in the seder which is actually called the four difficulties. Every year at this time we are reminded that our people were once slaves. This year, I will continue to pray for the release of all the hostages, “Let My People Go,” and for peace and safety in Israel, on college campus, at home and everywhere in the world. I truly wish that Next Year we will all be in Jerusalem together.

Four Difficulties for This Year���s Seder

BY RABBI YOSHI ZWEIBACK, Stephen Wise Temple

Our tradition interestingly calls this part of the seder the ���Four Difficulties��� (�������� �������������� – Arba HaKushiyot), not the ���Four Questions.��� It���s really just one question, ���How is this night different from all others��� with various challenges (difficulties) pointed out, i.e., ���On other nights we eat both leavened and unleavened products. Tonight, only unleavened.��� This year, the questions���and difficulties���seem even heavier. In this moment of collective pain and sorrow, I want to suggest four ���difficulties��� that are particularly resonant in 5784/2024.

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WATCH: Columbia student @edenyadegar spoke at a Congressional hearing investigating antisemitism at her university, embodying courage and tenacity even as she and her fellow Jewish students increasingly face anti-Jewish bigotry on campus.

Today is 196 days since our captives were taken from us. Over six months into this terrible war, we continue to mourn those murdered on October 7 and the hundreds of fallen soldiers who have made the ultimate sacrifice since then. We sympathize with the more than 100,000 Israelis who are still internal refugees. We are still shaken from the trauma of this past Shabbat afternoon when we waited in fear to see how Iran���s unprecedented attack on Israel would unfold. Each day, we hear another story of how our children are being forced to confront virulent antisemitism and anti-Israel rhetoric on their college and high-school campuses. We are tired. We are in pain. How do we not give in to despair? How do we hold on to hope?

After a few initial days of solidarity and sympathy, it seems that the world has forgotten why we are even fighting this war. But for Hamas, the cease fire that existed on October 6 would still be in place, and the suffering that has been inflicted on our people (as well as their own) would not have occurred. We feel at times isolated, an embodiment of the text from the Book of Numbers that describes our ancestors as: ���a people that dwells apart, not reckoned among the nations.��� At such a moment, how do we acknowledge these feelings without forgetting that we have real friends, true allies who have stood with us through hard times and who will, God willing, be there for us in the future? 

The struggle we are engaged in is no sprint, it���s a marathon. If history is a predictor of what will unfold going forward, we will need the strength, courage, and resilience to stand up for ourselves in the face of antisemitism for many generations to come. In the face of double-standards, demonization, and delegitimization, we will need to defend Israel continually. Recently, Franklin Foer argued in��The Atlantic��that the ���Jewish vacation from history��� is over.��In such a time, where can we find the��koach (������������ – ���energy, strength���)��to continue to build Jewish community and embrace our glorious, 3000- year-old heritage? How will we nurture the resilience we need in the face of real enemies who seek our harm to stand up for our inalienable rights as Jews and human beings to liberty, autonomy, happiness, security, and life?

I don���t know about you, but in addition to sadness and pain, I have felt a great deal of anger well up inside of me over these past six months. When I hear story after story of the victims of October 7, those who survived the trauma, and those whose lives have been upended as a result, I sometimes feel rage. In our traditional Haggadah, we ask that God ���pour out wrath��� on those who seek our harm. It���s an understandable response to thousands of years of antisemitism that has resulted in pogroms, massacres, and even Holocaust. But I fear that anger and hatred will ultimately consume us and distort the essence of who we are as Jews, a people described by our tradition as ���compassionate ones, the descendents of compassionate ones (�������������������� ������������ ��������������������).��� Our essential nature is to be loving, good-hearted people. There are times for anger and wrath but our default must be love, empathy, and compassion. How do we remain a loving, kind-hearted people in the face of the very real hatred that is directed towards us?

Let���s just acknowledge that these four difficulties are a lot. Like most of you, I would guess, I���d rather just return to the traditional ���Four Questions.��� They are easier: why do we eat matzah and maror, why do we dip our foods not just once but twice, and why do we recline while eating? The difficulties above are much harder, more nuanced and more painful.

But sometimes, often really, history acts on us and we have no choice but to respond.

The kushiyot (questions) of October 7 and its aftermath cannot be ignored. They are, tragically, part of a pattern of challenges going back at least until the time of the Pharaoh who knew not Joseph. And perhaps that���s part of the way we manage all of these new/old difficulties. As we sit at our Passover tables and retell the story, we remind ourselves of the many experiences of redemption, liberation, and joy that have been scattered throughout the moments of oppression, trauma, and pain.

We have crossed through narrow spaces before and made it to the Promised Land. We have experienced deliverance in our own lifetimes: 1948, 1967, and perhaps even this past Saturday evening. No matter the difficulties: �������� ������ �������������� ���������������������� (od lo avda tikvateinu) ��� we have not yet (nor must we ever) lose our hope.

May this festival of our freedom be one that inspires in us and all Israel strength, resilience, determination, compassion, love, and tikvah.

Shabbat shalom and Chag Sameach, Rabbi Yoshi

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The Zoe Report: My Post-Divorce Wardrobe Helped Me Channel My Inner Child

Thank you The Zoe Report! What an honor to have my article, ���My Post-Divorce Wardrobe Helped Me Heal My Inner Child,��� go live during OSCARS weekend! Thank you Angela Melero for the incredible opportunity and superb edits.

My Post-Divorce Wardrobe Helped Me Channel My Inner Child

There have been many points in my life in which I have had to begin again. Even though I have changed careers and cities multiple times with success, this time I felt broken and unsure about the next steps. After 18 months of��adventure, an odyssey across Asia that was meant to be a shared dream with my husband of five years unraveled into a nightmare ��� and divorce.

My partner and I were both lifelong travelers: I had previously worked for Club Med and Princess Cruises and he had been in the Peace Corps. After meeting online, we spent a year backpacking together and came home engaged and ready to put down roots. Despite a beautiful wedding and promises to cherish and respect, we found ourselves fighting frequently. I thought that if we were back on the road, things would get better. Sadly, even amidst a beautiful exotic landscape in Thailand, he was still constantly angry and all of that aggravation was focused on me. That is, until I left abruptly, calling an end to my epic trip and��marriage.

At 47 years old, feeling adrift in a sea of hopelessness, I realized I had to return to the United States alone. The key components to my old life in California had been dismantled before departure ��� I had quit my job as a teacher at an elementary school in Los Angeles, sold my car, and handed my condo keys to a new tenant.

I literally had to start from scratch ��� in more ways than one.

Upon returning to California, I was in a state of shock and reeling from the breakup. After wearing the same few T-shirts from my backpack for months, I thought I would leap at the opportunity to reimagine my existing wardrobe and find fresh ways to wear the pieces that had served me for years. But when I tried to get dressed to go out, I felt frozen. I was not sure what to wear or if anything even looked good on me anymore. After hearing so many times from my ex that I looked ugly, fat, and old, choosing clothes felt impossible as I was insecure from the constant criticism. While some things fit me properly, in my mind nothing looked good on me. I hated anything that reminded me of him and his critiques. I felt stuck somewhere in the space between my old constantly-criticized self and my undiscovered single one.

However, I managed to get two new jobs upon my return: writing for USA Today and teaching at Nickelodeon. These new gigs meant I needed a new car��� and something to wear to work. But the latter meant I would have to unlearn some dressing habits and behaviors I had developed in my toxic marriage.

You see, after I got married I stopped wearing short skirts or overly revealing tops. At first, it had seemed like a small thing to comply with my husband���s preferences as a way to tone down his jealousy. However, as time went on, his controlling nature expanded beyond my wardrobe to everything from my hair and weight to even the friends I spent time with. He also hated when I bought anything new because he claimed that money should be saved for our next trip. Splurging on the occasional going-out dress or trendy pair of jeans was just not a luxury I partook in. And while regret can certainly consume you in times like this, I knew it was a futile thing. I can���t change the past or the decisions I made in my marriage. I needed to focus on my future and make different choices ��� starting with my clothes.

In my quest for reinvention, I recall a conversation I had with a fellow teacher, Sarah, before I left for my trip. I just loved her clothes. My uniform for school was typically casual��streetwear��from an athletic store while she often opted for breezy long skirts and vibrant tops in fun color palettes that felt so fresh and youthful, but also professional enough for the classroom. I learned that much of her clothes actually came from Limited Too, a popular clothing retailer for tween girls (that has since shuttered). While this may seem like an odd sartorial choice for an adult woman, I was intrigued to see if I could channel the same youthful energy, without a controlling partner to hold me back. I journeyed to Justice, a similar yet more current version of Limited Too, dragging my friend, Amy, into the mall to help me shop. When she first discovered my shopping mission, she looked at me aghast and said, ���Are you kidding me? I buy clothes for my 8-year-old niece in here!���

Luckily, she humored me while I combed through the racks and skimmed through the fun bright clothes with sparkles. When we first arrived, the rainbow of colors seemed overtly overwhelming and childish, but I refused to be deterred. I gravitated toward items with hearts and messages of love and joy. You see, my pre-divorce wardrobe was void of such color and exuberance, but I was ready to let carefree dressing re-enter the chat, even if it meant starting my journey at a tween store. Yes, I was concerned about what people would say about my kiddy clothes but there was also a defiant voice telling me I needed to stop giving other people real estate in my head. If I liked how I looked and felt comfortable and joyful in my skin, that needed to be enough.

Similar to the shopping sprees of my youth, this unconventional errand was a giggly good time. The clothes were playful and while I knew my ex would have said they were ridiculous, he no longer had a vote. My inner kid was finally smiling again ��� big, authentic smiles. Changing my clothing was a way to impress upon myself and others that I was fully in control again.

At the end of it all, I settled on a shirt with a butterfly emblem on it, as it reminded me of a symbol I had loved since I was a child. Caterpillars crawl on branches but after metamorphosis, they can fly ��� I like that. When I went to check out, the woman at the register asked me, ���How old is your daughter?��� I replied, ���These are for me!��� She seemed a bit flustered that I was in a tween store shopping for myself at my advanced age, but quickly recovered and said, ���Enjoy your new clothes.��� In the end, I bought an armful of items and my face hurt from smiling so much.

���Changing my clothing was a way to impress upon myself and others that I was fully in control again.���

This experience reminded me that life doesn���t need to be so serious ��� it can have more ease and joy. Fast-forward 10 years later and I still have a goofy, impish sequin T-shirt collection, but I also have a more grown-up closet full of jewel-toned V-neck designer dresses that show off my hourglass figure without shame or insecurity.

I���ve also since written a memoir,��Brave-ish: One Breakup, Six Continents and Feeling Fearless After Fifty, and for speaking engagements promoting the book, I find myself reaching for sleek pantsuits that feel both of-the-moment and timeless. For formal events and the occasional red carpet (my��podcast��was recently honored at the National Arts and Entertainment Journalism Awards in Los Angeles), I love a dramatic floor-length gown ��� especially one with a high slit ��� and glittery heels for an old Hollywood glamour moment.

I no longer needed to concern myself with anyone���s disapproval. I feel comfortable in my skin and clothes again. I know what looks good on me and I let go of my worries and the repercussions of someone else���s whims.

While the imbalance in my relationship had made me question my choices, I found my way again. I took the time to rediscover what I liked and started over to save myself. My road has been unconventional and sometimes so are my shopping choices. But they���re mine all the same.

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After Lisa Niver���s divorce, she went through a full style transformation: ���When I tried to get dressed to go out, I felt frozen. After hearing so many times from my ex that I looked ugly, fat, and old, choosing clothes felt impossible as I was insecure from the constant criticism.��� �����@lisaniver��details her experience building a post-divorce wardrobe, and how a shopping spree at Justice led to rediscovering her independence. ���

On The Zoe Report Facebook:

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BRAVE-ish: Best Book for the Strong Woman Zibby Awards 2023

Thank you to Zibby Owens, Zibby Media, Zibby’s Bookshop and the Zibby Awards! I am so honored that my memoir, Brave-ish: One Breakup, Six Continents and Feeling Fearless After 50, is a finalist for their “BEST BOOK FOR THE STRONG WOMAN” for 2023! Learn more about my book on my site, LisaNiver.com, and at Simon & Schuster

I was honored that Zibby interviewed me for the nineteenth season of her podcast, Moms Don’t Have Time To Read, about my memoir, Brave-ish.

Zibby for joined me on my podcast, Make Your Own Map, to talk about her book!

Zibby’s Bookshop hosted a live event for my book with Chris Palmeri from Bloomberg!

THANK YOU TO THE ZIBBY-VERSE!

You can read my book as a paperback, digital e-book or listen to the audiobook –and YES! I am the narrator! Remember small steps lead to BIG changes!

2023 Zibby Awards Runner-up: Best Book for The Strong Woman
2023 HEARTEN Book Awards Finalist for Inspiring & Uplifting Non-Fiction
2023 WINNER: Goody Business Book Awards: Memoir/Self-Help
Featured in Conde Nast Traveler Women Who Travel Book Club: 10 New Books We Can’t Wait to Read this Fall
As seen in��Forbes��Best New NonFiction

CLICK HERE FOR TO PURCHASE

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Brave-ish on Arizona Family TV

I loved being interviewed on Arizona Family TV. Thank you to Jaime Cerreta for inviting me on her show for a segment called: “Becoming Brave and Fearless Over 50” to talk about my memoir and doing 50 DARES before 50 after my divorce.

Jaime Cerreta, 3pm 3TV News Anchor KTVK 3TV/KPHO CBS5, interviewed me about becoming brave and my memoir, Brave-ish: One Breakup, Six Continents and Feeling Fearless After Fifty on Feb 15, 2024.

What did we talk about? WATCH HERE and see below for more details: Taking small risks can build big confidences! Try a class like salsa dancing or a different flavor of ice cream.

I was so scared at a dude ranch in Tucson and took beginner’s class TWICE! How to go from CITY SLICKER to COW GIRL!

Go kayaking in the Galapagos–this was one of my bucket list dreams and it came true after my 50 Dares!

DARE #50: Sky Diving in San Diego It is okay to START OVER! It is hard to try again when you feel stuck—you can give yourself a chance and you can have HELP! Check out my memoir for more ideas!

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