Roxy Mews's Blog, page 5
February 2, 2019
Weird Writer Ways
If you google search "Writer Quirks" you'll have reading material for days. We could go over the usual stereotypes of writers who are obsessed with coffee and wine and the oxford comma. Most of us are. There have been a few buddies of mine that don't fit the mold. I worry about them sometimes.But I've learned that those of us who spend some time sitting at a keyboard and typing out our stories, all have something we HAVE to do. There is a little quirky bit in all of us that sets us apart from the masses.
I've known people who do elaborate plot boards, or people who need a specific set of pens and post-its for notes.
At first I tried to hide my quirks or just plain had to because I didn't have an office before last year. Since I've set up my own space and had some time to settle in, I've noticed a few things about myself, and thought I'd share.
My Top Five Weird Writing Ways...
1. I write better with over the ear headphones on. Nope. No idea why. Even if there's nothing playing in them, the act of putting the world-hushing cups over my ears gets me writing more quickly than I would have otherwise. I put them on before I started writing this blog.
2. I need post-its and a pen. Always. If I'm cooking away on a scene and don't want to stop, but a thought entered my brain about an upcoming event, major life task I should have already handled, bill I should pay, etc...I HAVE to write it down. So I scribble a note and slap it on the wall in front of me. It's on paper so it's out of my head and I can continue where I was. If I didn't have that paper, I would have had to stop the flow coming from my fingers and lose the magic. I don't always write on those sheets of paper, but I do have to have them. Otherwise I worry about not having them as I'm writing. (There's a reason I titled this list "weird")
3. A pen any color other than red to use for edits. Maybe it's the vicious ways those teachers used to mark up my first stories in middle school with red, or the blast of red that comes on a computer screen with the track changes file from the editors. I don't know. But I can't make edits to my paper copy with red. I usually use purple or green. I can't stand marking up paper with red. I'm pretty sure I changed my own Track Changes colors to reflect this too. I like making a manuscript better and ripping it to shreds. I just want it to bleed purple.
4. A dog and a cat bed around me. Hubby calls me Snow White. Wherever I am, the pets have to be, and if I don't have a space for them to perch, or snuggle, they chose me. My dog has a bed by my feet, and my cat has a small ottoman he can perch on. He's too high and mighty to stay on the floor. I don't know if this is a writer quirk or an animal one, but it's something I have to have cleared off if I plan to get any work done.5. Noise. I need noise. I've only recently started writing in an office and I found out really quick that writing without some kind of background noise was HELL. My mind wandered. I bounce back and forth between a well-curated Pandora channel, and my favorite Ambient Mixer room, the Hogwarts Library. If I'm going in for longer stints I can rock with the Pandora station that had driving beats to keep me going, but if I need to zero in and focus, it's going to be my ASMR-style background noise.
Are you a writer? What are your weirdly wonderful ways that you keep the words flowing? I'd love to hear about them.
~Roxy
February 1, 2019
BiG Beautiful Recommendation
If you go back a couple days in my blog, I was having a kindle-throwing time trying to read a book about a heroine who lost a hundred pounds and had no loose skin (eye roll), but despite being an "independent woman" was going mean girls and running high school mentality schemes.
Needless to say, seeing a woman portrayed that way, and the insinuation that she couldn't possibly get the guy as a bigger girl pissed me the FUCK off. Could also have been a dig to see the author quote the size I currently am as "disgustingly big", but hey...knowing the author thinks I'm disgusting is neither here nor there.
But I'm not grumpy about it. *Ahem*
So I took to twitter and was gifted with a recommendation for the book I'm currently pimping to you all. I asked for a plus-sized heroine who was happy just as she fucking was.
Enter a rec for Kylie Scott. I heard the series was called "Dive Bar" and shit...this MidWest gal was sold. I bought " Dirty " and it was on my kindle in seconds.
I didn't read the blurb. (The rec came from a trusted source. Thanks Karen Greco!) I didn't look up the cover, but I had heard Kylie Scott's name bounced around the interwebs. I think she popped up on my Amazon recommededs from time to time, before they were all paid spots.
I opened the book and could not put it down. The book starts with an incredibly low point for the heroine, and drops you into a scene that has our gal scaling a fence to get away from her groom-to-be's awful family. She meets a former rockstar, who is also going through his own shit. But they both tackle their demons with some smartass lines, a few punches and a great big dose of fantastically written sex scenes.
This heroine isn't a skinny bitch, she's got curves and bumps, but when she'd drunk on studmuffin sexy, she can't help but throw caution to the wind and jump his bones. This doesn't end with her losing the weight and "feeling better". This ends with her loving food, embracing her hero's love of her stellar rack, and a lot of happy sappy love.
I haven't had a "read till the end" book in a while. I needed this, and I needed this heroine. Thank you, Kylie!
~Roxy
Needless to say, seeing a woman portrayed that way, and the insinuation that she couldn't possibly get the guy as a bigger girl pissed me the FUCK off. Could also have been a dig to see the author quote the size I currently am as "disgustingly big", but hey...knowing the author thinks I'm disgusting is neither here nor there.
But I'm not grumpy about it. *Ahem*So I took to twitter and was gifted with a recommendation for the book I'm currently pimping to you all. I asked for a plus-sized heroine who was happy just as she fucking was.
Enter a rec for Kylie Scott. I heard the series was called "Dive Bar" and shit...this MidWest gal was sold. I bought " Dirty " and it was on my kindle in seconds.
I didn't read the blurb. (The rec came from a trusted source. Thanks Karen Greco!) I didn't look up the cover, but I had heard Kylie Scott's name bounced around the interwebs. I think she popped up on my Amazon recommededs from time to time, before they were all paid spots.
I opened the book and could not put it down. The book starts with an incredibly low point for the heroine, and drops you into a scene that has our gal scaling a fence to get away from her groom-to-be's awful family. She meets a former rockstar, who is also going through his own shit. But they both tackle their demons with some smartass lines, a few punches and a great big dose of fantastically written sex scenes.
This heroine isn't a skinny bitch, she's got curves and bumps, but when she'd drunk on studmuffin sexy, she can't help but throw caution to the wind and jump his bones. This doesn't end with her losing the weight and "feeling better". This ends with her loving food, embracing her hero's love of her stellar rack, and a lot of happy sappy love.
I haven't had a "read till the end" book in a while. I needed this, and I needed this heroine. Thank you, Kylie!
Do you have any big beautiful heroines you just love? Or big beautiful heroes? I love to read about characters of all shapes and sizes. I would say I'd jump on the rec's right away, but after getting a taste of Kylie Scott's humor, her writing style, and her characters? Shit...I'm about to binge a bitch's backlist. I highly suggest you do the same!Guys. I am now a @KylieScottbooks fan and have to start binging her backlist. If you're looking for a plus sized heroine, whose story isn't about her weight and her HEA doesn't involve a diet...I could not put down "Dirty" (Dive Bar Series Book 1).
— Roxy Mews (@RoxyMews) February 1, 2019
~Roxy
January 31, 2019
The Stages Of Getting Sick
We are an empty kleenex box deep into this year's cold and flu season. I don't know about you, but I try my damnedest to avoid any germs that might be headed my way.
I work in retail. So I am in close contact with germs on the regular. Do you even know how gross, and cootie-covered money is? Ew.So I am super conscious about germs at work. I would say *knocking on all the wood* that I haven't picked up any serious viruses from my evil day job.
The problem lies in the fact that I don't live alone. I have a large family that I have to interact with, eat with, and one I sleep next to every night. Well...that last one...he's the main culprit. My hubby doesn't know how to keep his damn germs to himself. And when I do get sick, it's usually thanks to some nasty bug he's brought into the house and shared with me.
Because of that, I have identified the five stages of getting sick. Want to hear them? Keep reading. And since I started this blog by talking about work, all my gifs today are from one of my favorite shows about retail...Superstore. Enjoy.
STAGE 1 : Noticing Patient Zero
When I see a virus take down someone close to me, I make a serious mental note. When I catch someone sneeze more than twice in an hour when they aren't dusting or cooking with an excessive amount of pepper, they go on my "Don't touch them without using sanitizer afterward" list.
STAGE 2 : Creating a Buffer
I pull back from hugs, or at least try not to breathe heavily around said sick individual. Like I said, it's usually hubby, so I try to be kind while putting at least 3 feet of space between us at all times.
STAGE 3 : Immune System Power Up
I binge on all the high vitamin C foods. Right now I still have leftovers of all the bell peppers, strawberries, and oranges. I also buy some of the high immunity booster fizzies to add to a glass of water in the morning, and these effing deliciousRicola Herbal Immunity gummies. These suckers have blocked a few colds from taking over my life, and I swear by them.STAGE 4 : The Tickle You Never Wanted
It could be a scratchy throat, or a particularly chesty cough, or even a burn in your sinuses that lets you know you've started the roll down the hill toward sick. I usually feel it in the back of my throat at first, but the sinuses are usually right behind. And when I notice those symptoms, I start to prepare, because I'm about to get taken over by the germs I fought to avoid. And when you are employed in a "Fire at Will" state, there are no sick days.
At this point, I buy any cold and flu drugs I'm out of, make sure I have extra tissues, and grab at least two freezer-to-oven meal options. I'm about to get sick.Which brings us to the final stage...
STAGE 5: Acceptance
At this point...I'm sick. There's no fighting it. There's no preventing anything. It's here, and I'm miserable. I go through my stash of freezer meals, drink tons of coffee and Tazo Butterscotch Blondie tea to counteract all the cold medicine I'm currently on. Because I don't get to take days off...especially during a polar vortex when every one is home and making tons of noise while using every dish in the house.
Thank goodness I remembered beer. Because a little buzz to help me sleep is welcome when I'm up sneezing every two hours.Has the dreaded cold brought your To Do's to a stop yet this year? Any tips on aiding in a quick recovery? I'd love to hear all about it, in between sneezing fits.
~Roxy
I work in retail. So I am in close contact with germs on the regular. Do you even know how gross, and cootie-covered money is? Ew.So I am super conscious about germs at work. I would say *knocking on all the wood* that I haven't picked up any serious viruses from my evil day job.
The problem lies in the fact that I don't live alone. I have a large family that I have to interact with, eat with, and one I sleep next to every night. Well...that last one...he's the main culprit. My hubby doesn't know how to keep his damn germs to himself. And when I do get sick, it's usually thanks to some nasty bug he's brought into the house and shared with me.
Because of that, I have identified the five stages of getting sick. Want to hear them? Keep reading. And since I started this blog by talking about work, all my gifs today are from one of my favorite shows about retail...Superstore. Enjoy.
STAGE 1 : Noticing Patient Zero
When I see a virus take down someone close to me, I make a serious mental note. When I catch someone sneeze more than twice in an hour when they aren't dusting or cooking with an excessive amount of pepper, they go on my "Don't touch them without using sanitizer afterward" list.
STAGE 2 : Creating a BufferI pull back from hugs, or at least try not to breathe heavily around said sick individual. Like I said, it's usually hubby, so I try to be kind while putting at least 3 feet of space between us at all times.
STAGE 3 : Immune System Power Up
I binge on all the high vitamin C foods. Right now I still have leftovers of all the bell peppers, strawberries, and oranges. I also buy some of the high immunity booster fizzies to add to a glass of water in the morning, and these effing deliciousRicola Herbal Immunity gummies. These suckers have blocked a few colds from taking over my life, and I swear by them.STAGE 4 : The Tickle You Never Wanted
It could be a scratchy throat, or a particularly chesty cough, or even a burn in your sinuses that lets you know you've started the roll down the hill toward sick. I usually feel it in the back of my throat at first, but the sinuses are usually right behind. And when I notice those symptoms, I start to prepare, because I'm about to get taken over by the germs I fought to avoid. And when you are employed in a "Fire at Will" state, there are no sick days.
At this point, I buy any cold and flu drugs I'm out of, make sure I have extra tissues, and grab at least two freezer-to-oven meal options. I'm about to get sick.Which brings us to the final stage...
STAGE 5: Acceptance
At this point...I'm sick. There's no fighting it. There's no preventing anything. It's here, and I'm miserable. I go through my stash of freezer meals, drink tons of coffee and Tazo Butterscotch Blondie tea to counteract all the cold medicine I'm currently on. Because I don't get to take days off...especially during a polar vortex when every one is home and making tons of noise while using every dish in the house.
Thank goodness I remembered beer. Because a little buzz to help me sleep is welcome when I'm up sneezing every two hours.Has the dreaded cold brought your To Do's to a stop yet this year? Any tips on aiding in a quick recovery? I'd love to hear all about it, in between sneezing fits.
~Roxy
January 30, 2019
Weight Loss Does Not Equal HEA
Fair warning, y'all. Your girl is sick as hell. Hubby gave me his man cold, and of course I still have to do all the things I'd normally do, I just have to do them with kleenex nearby and hopped up on cold medicine.
Maybe that's why my current read hit me as hard as it did.
I'm not naming and shaming, because I've seen this trope a few times and it makes me grumpy every time I see it. I usually try and avoid said trope, but I stumbled onto this one because I got caught up on the recommendation and didn't do my own research. It's my own damn fault. Even so, I want to talk about it.
The trope I'm talking about is the one where an overweight heroine misses out on the guy because she's "fat, insecure, and unhappy", only to have a massive weight loss, and hit him back up to show how hot and successful she is now, rubbing it in his face. Variations on this include the heroine not knowing she's going to bump into her ex/crush/fantasy guy from her past, or heroine finding out she's forced to work with said hero from her past.
Of course, since I read romance almost exclusively in my fiction TBR, this means the heroine is about to embark on a romance with the dude who couldn't be bothered with her when she was heavy.
Obviously, as a big gal myself, this irks me.
I'm honestly happier and more confident in myself now than I was when I was eighty pounds lighter. Yes. Honestly. I dress how I want, and I don't put on things I don't like to please others. That could also have to do with my age. The point is...my happiness is not, and has never been tied to my weight. It has to do with my thoughts. It has to do with how much time I spend working on myself and my personal goals.
Years ago, eighty pounds lighter, two months after a miscarriage, I had a male doctor look at my weight and tell me "I'm sure you're working on losing weight. You obviously can't be happy with where you're at."
At one of the lowest points of my life, and one of my lowest weights, the doctor told me, in front of his student colleague, that I wasn't good enough.
I'm not telling you this to evoke pity. He was an old man, and I'm sure he's retired now, if not dead. Either way, I'm confident he won't be doing that shit to other women anymore. I'm telling you this to let you know, that no matter what your body looks like, or how much you weigh, there will always be someone out there who thinks you're not good enough.
FUCK. THEM.
There is no need to prove anything to people, because you and your body have nothing to do with how awful they are. And showing up to "rub it in their face" won't make you feel better if you lose weight. Now...I'm not saying losing weight won't make you feel better. Sometimes it does. If you want to get healthier for yourself, and to be able to do more things that your weight might be holding you back from, do it. But do it for you. This idea that losing weight will make someone love you is fucking atrocious.
Which is exactly why I loathe seeing it romanticized in fiction.
I have no issue with reading books about women who are thin. I have no issues with reading books about female athletes. I'll never be in either of those camps, but beauty comes in a lot of forms. Not just curvy ones. And I think they should all be represented and celebrated. If every heroine was the same, it would be boring.
What I take serious issue with, is a heroine who is stunted in her maturity level by such a degree, that she has to lose weight to "get the guy" she wants. What I take issue with is a woman who has to gain her self worth from a scale and male attention.
If any other authors stumble on here, this probably isn't about you specifically. But if you find something I'm saying here offends you, feel free to evaluate that on your own time. If the shoe fits, feel free to strap it on and get mad at me.
But I want to make a couple of points.
1. Extreme weight loss comes with side effects. If your heroine looses over a hundred pounds, she's not going to have tight and toned skin. She's going to have loose skin requiring surgery at the most, and tons of stretch marks at the very least. If she's perfect from head to toe after a dropping a ton of weight, this tells me you're a skinny woman trying to jump on the band wagon and you've never known anyone who is overweight. Educate yourself.
2. Losing weight is not Prozac. Dropping weight does not make you happy. It might give a confidence boost, but not always. The world vilifies fat people, and jumping on the train of the pretty people will make some feel better. But without showing your heroine's growth in other areas, you are equating skinny with happy, and it's just not true.
3. Not all women get fat, but we all go through changes. Very few people who have long term relationships look like they did when their relationship started. Having a hero not want a heroine when she was fat, but falling for her when she's thin, shows me as a reader that the moment she loses her looks, he'll be out the door. And I'm not down for an asshole getting the prize.
Before I get people coming for me, I'm not telling anyone what to write. People hate my books, and they are entitled to their opinion. But I have experience as an overweight woman, and what those people experience. Seeing the bullshit I deal with on the regular misrepresented to such a degree pisses me off.
So if you want to write a curvy heroine and you've never been friends with someone who has extra junk in the trunk, maybe...I don't know...talk to us. And if you're one of those bitches who sits in a corner cackling with her buds discussing how a plus sized woman shouldn't wear certain things...just stick to writing people who you find beauty in. Because when you write a heroine you'd go mean girls on in real life, it shows.
Below is a little song that's been making the rounds. And I feel like it's a good time to blast it in my kitchen today while I pick a different book to read. Do you have any favorite books that handle weight loss well? I'd love to have a good book cued up after my dance party.
~Roxy
Maybe that's why my current read hit me as hard as it did.
I'm not naming and shaming, because I've seen this trope a few times and it makes me grumpy every time I see it. I usually try and avoid said trope, but I stumbled onto this one because I got caught up on the recommendation and didn't do my own research. It's my own damn fault. Even so, I want to talk about it.
The trope I'm talking about is the one where an overweight heroine misses out on the guy because she's "fat, insecure, and unhappy", only to have a massive weight loss, and hit him back up to show how hot and successful she is now, rubbing it in his face. Variations on this include the heroine not knowing she's going to bump into her ex/crush/fantasy guy from her past, or heroine finding out she's forced to work with said hero from her past.
Of course, since I read romance almost exclusively in my fiction TBR, this means the heroine is about to embark on a romance with the dude who couldn't be bothered with her when she was heavy.
Obviously, as a big gal myself, this irks me.
I'm honestly happier and more confident in myself now than I was when I was eighty pounds lighter. Yes. Honestly. I dress how I want, and I don't put on things I don't like to please others. That could also have to do with my age. The point is...my happiness is not, and has never been tied to my weight. It has to do with my thoughts. It has to do with how much time I spend working on myself and my personal goals.
Years ago, eighty pounds lighter, two months after a miscarriage, I had a male doctor look at my weight and tell me "I'm sure you're working on losing weight. You obviously can't be happy with where you're at."
At one of the lowest points of my life, and one of my lowest weights, the doctor told me, in front of his student colleague, that I wasn't good enough.
I'm not telling you this to evoke pity. He was an old man, and I'm sure he's retired now, if not dead. Either way, I'm confident he won't be doing that shit to other women anymore. I'm telling you this to let you know, that no matter what your body looks like, or how much you weigh, there will always be someone out there who thinks you're not good enough.
FUCK. THEM.
There is no need to prove anything to people, because you and your body have nothing to do with how awful they are. And showing up to "rub it in their face" won't make you feel better if you lose weight. Now...I'm not saying losing weight won't make you feel better. Sometimes it does. If you want to get healthier for yourself, and to be able to do more things that your weight might be holding you back from, do it. But do it for you. This idea that losing weight will make someone love you is fucking atrocious.
Which is exactly why I loathe seeing it romanticized in fiction.
I have no issue with reading books about women who are thin. I have no issues with reading books about female athletes. I'll never be in either of those camps, but beauty comes in a lot of forms. Not just curvy ones. And I think they should all be represented and celebrated. If every heroine was the same, it would be boring.
What I take serious issue with, is a heroine who is stunted in her maturity level by such a degree, that she has to lose weight to "get the guy" she wants. What I take issue with is a woman who has to gain her self worth from a scale and male attention.
If any other authors stumble on here, this probably isn't about you specifically. But if you find something I'm saying here offends you, feel free to evaluate that on your own time. If the shoe fits, feel free to strap it on and get mad at me.
But I want to make a couple of points.
1. Extreme weight loss comes with side effects. If your heroine looses over a hundred pounds, she's not going to have tight and toned skin. She's going to have loose skin requiring surgery at the most, and tons of stretch marks at the very least. If she's perfect from head to toe after a dropping a ton of weight, this tells me you're a skinny woman trying to jump on the band wagon and you've never known anyone who is overweight. Educate yourself.
2. Losing weight is not Prozac. Dropping weight does not make you happy. It might give a confidence boost, but not always. The world vilifies fat people, and jumping on the train of the pretty people will make some feel better. But without showing your heroine's growth in other areas, you are equating skinny with happy, and it's just not true.
3. Not all women get fat, but we all go through changes. Very few people who have long term relationships look like they did when their relationship started. Having a hero not want a heroine when she was fat, but falling for her when she's thin, shows me as a reader that the moment she loses her looks, he'll be out the door. And I'm not down for an asshole getting the prize.
Before I get people coming for me, I'm not telling anyone what to write. People hate my books, and they are entitled to their opinion. But I have experience as an overweight woman, and what those people experience. Seeing the bullshit I deal with on the regular misrepresented to such a degree pisses me off.
So if you want to write a curvy heroine and you've never been friends with someone who has extra junk in the trunk, maybe...I don't know...talk to us. And if you're one of those bitches who sits in a corner cackling with her buds discussing how a plus sized woman shouldn't wear certain things...just stick to writing people who you find beauty in. Because when you write a heroine you'd go mean girls on in real life, it shows.
Below is a little song that's been making the rounds. And I feel like it's a good time to blast it in my kitchen today while I pick a different book to read. Do you have any favorite books that handle weight loss well? I'd love to have a good book cued up after my dance party.
~Roxy
January 29, 2019
I love vacations I can take from my couch
It's no secret that I'm a bit of a hermit. Getting me to leave my house is not an easy task. If I have a day off, spending it with a good book is one of my favorite things.
But I do have family and friends who love to travel. And while I like to think I'd enjoy going with them, what I really like is to hear about their travels.
Which is why I'm stoked my friendJayne Rylon has released videos about her recent adventures! She even put out a book today " Roaming with the Rylons " and I'm stoked to hear in detail all about her travels.
But since I've been crazy busy today, I was even more excited when her videos highlighting some of her adventures went live and popped up in my subscription feed.
So if you actually like to leave your house and travel, or if you're like me and enjoy checking out different parts of the world from the comfort of your pajamas while reclining on your couch, this will be something very entertaining.
Are you a travel buff? Or are you a couch surfer who would rather play an epic video game while food is delivered to your door? I'd love to hear about it...after I watch the next video.
~Roxy
But I do have family and friends who love to travel. And while I like to think I'd enjoy going with them, what I really like is to hear about their travels.
Which is why I'm stoked my friendJayne Rylon has released videos about her recent adventures! She even put out a book today " Roaming with the Rylons " and I'm stoked to hear in detail all about her travels.
But since I've been crazy busy today, I was even more excited when her videos highlighting some of her adventures went live and popped up in my subscription feed.
So if you actually like to leave your house and travel, or if you're like me and enjoy checking out different parts of the world from the comfort of your pajamas while reclining on your couch, this will be something very entertaining.
Are you a travel buff? Or are you a couch surfer who would rather play an epic video game while food is delivered to your door? I'd love to hear about it...after I watch the next video.
~Roxy
January 28, 2019
A video to annoy the techie in your life
We have had an Amazon Echo in our house for a few years now. And occasionally I like to watch videos to learn more about it. Here's the thing...I can't watch them without earbuds because my Echo picks up on the command words and has a fit.
Every once in a while I like to be a shithead and play videos like this in friends' houses who I know have these tech pieces. Many people who love gadgets have more than one platform. So you have to tailor your videos based on platform.
If you want a go-to video to loop and annoy your buddies. Here's a winner with Apple, Google, and Amazon all making the rounds.
Hey...April Fool's Day is just around the corner. We need to be prepared. So if you need a good prank, put this video on your phone at low volume right next to the prankee's virtual assistant of choice, and let the good times roll.
Bring an accomplice to take video of your prank victim's annoyance. And if you do try this and succeed please share the results. I'd love to see it.
~Roxy
Every once in a while I like to be a shithead and play videos like this in friends' houses who I know have these tech pieces. Many people who love gadgets have more than one platform. So you have to tailor your videos based on platform.
If you want a go-to video to loop and annoy your buddies. Here's a winner with Apple, Google, and Amazon all making the rounds.
Hey...April Fool's Day is just around the corner. We need to be prepared. So if you need a good prank, put this video on your phone at low volume right next to the prankee's virtual assistant of choice, and let the good times roll.
Bring an accomplice to take video of your prank victim's annoyance. And if you do try this and succeed please share the results. I'd love to see it.
~Roxy
January 27, 2019
Yoga in the morning
With my goal to have my Miracle Mornings take place every day this year, I'm all about mixing things up and keeping them fresh. I wanted to get some cardio in, and since I don't have any exercise equipment and hate going into the outside world, I decided my first "Exercise" in my SAVERS would be walking up and down the stairs.
I was doing okay with this and slowly increasing my time in thirty second bursts. But my knees started to hurt. I have a job where I do some serious lifting up and down a ladder and am on my feet for 8-12 hours at a time. After a couple weeks of stair climbing and working, I found myself shaking on the ladder at work because my knees hurt. (Yes, I'm fat and need the exercise, but I don't want to fall off the ladder no matter how tempting the thought of staying home on workman's comp is.)
So I'm mixing it up. I started doing a little yoga in the morning. On days when I work, I don't have anymore than an hour to do my whole miracle morning, so I needed a 5 minute exercise. I started out with just a few sun salutations, but I had to think about the steps because I'm out of practice.
Thank goodness for YouTube, y'all. I found a couple of easy stretch yoga videos that are only five minutes long. I do this right after my meditation practice and I'm already noticing a difference in my body. My feet don't hurt as much first thing in the morning, and my posture is improving as I get my blog work done.
Here is my favorite sequence from YouTube. And it really is just five minutes!Between this and the other aspects I've put into place with my Miracle Morning and my #Roxys7DayChallenge I start my day with a sense of calm energy that I haven't had in a long time.
Do you practice yoga? I used to have some serious skill, but I need to work my way back up there. If you have any videos or apps you love to complement your own practice, I'd love to hear about them. I'm always looking for ways to mix things up. Or at least keep it fresh so I don't stop. I'm only 27 days into my goal of 365 in a row. I'll need to bank a few good ideas.
~Roxy
I was doing okay with this and slowly increasing my time in thirty second bursts. But my knees started to hurt. I have a job where I do some serious lifting up and down a ladder and am on my feet for 8-12 hours at a time. After a couple weeks of stair climbing and working, I found myself shaking on the ladder at work because my knees hurt. (Yes, I'm fat and need the exercise, but I don't want to fall off the ladder no matter how tempting the thought of staying home on workman's comp is.)
So I'm mixing it up. I started doing a little yoga in the morning. On days when I work, I don't have anymore than an hour to do my whole miracle morning, so I needed a 5 minute exercise. I started out with just a few sun salutations, but I had to think about the steps because I'm out of practice.
Thank goodness for YouTube, y'all. I found a couple of easy stretch yoga videos that are only five minutes long. I do this right after my meditation practice and I'm already noticing a difference in my body. My feet don't hurt as much first thing in the morning, and my posture is improving as I get my blog work done.
Here is my favorite sequence from YouTube. And it really is just five minutes!Between this and the other aspects I've put into place with my Miracle Morning and my #Roxys7DayChallenge I start my day with a sense of calm energy that I haven't had in a long time.
Do you practice yoga? I used to have some serious skill, but I need to work my way back up there. If you have any videos or apps you love to complement your own practice, I'd love to hear about them. I'm always looking for ways to mix things up. Or at least keep it fresh so I don't stop. I'm only 27 days into my goal of 365 in a row. I'll need to bank a few good ideas.
~Roxy
January 26, 2019
New social media makes me feel old
Nothing makes me feel like I'm out of touch more than attempting to use a new to me social media. Well...maybe listening to a current hits radio station, but I'll stay in my 90's music bubble and dance while telling people to get off my lawn with that one.Y'all know I'm addicted to YouTube. Like, it's a problem level addicted some days. And many of the channels I frequent have "Reddits". I started noticing that many of their favorite memes and posts come from this website and realized it's something I might be interested in checking out. Having recently conquered Discord with the help of a teenager to explain it to me, I was confident I should be able to tackle this site too.
This morning I decided it was time to sign up.
First impression? It looks like old-school Twitter and Buzzfeed had a baby. And frankly, I loved old-school Twitter more than the new fangled "Nothing is ever in chronological order any more" Twitter.
I clicked the sign up button and we're off!
I signed up as Roxy. Frankly, I always sign up as my author name. A good friend let her pseudonym website lapse when she was taking a break and had a fruit loop level stalker take it over and start posting as a creepy shrine blog. (Note to self: Check that all my domains are renewed.) And I've seen many author buddies have to take on numbers or underscores because their name is already taken. So I used RoxyMews as my login. Although the suggested username of "ConfidentPickle9" was REALLY tempting.
The first thing it takes me to is a list of sub reddits to "subscribe" to and suggests at least 5. Okay. Sounds reasonable.
r/books - Well, obviously I have to sign up for that one.
r/DIY - I bought a fixer upper house. This could be useful. Also, I'm broke as a promise to keep in touch with an ex, so DIY is good.
r/gadgets - All the yes!
r/lifehacks - Please let some of this be making fun of Troom Troom.
I'm scrolling along and then I realize there were some they auto signed me up for. How the hell did a Hot Wheels subreddit get on there? That's what I get for shopping online for Christmas presents.
Once I unchecked all the weird ones, I noticed that I ended up with a lot of makeup and beauty guru suggestions. Either I watch too many of those YouTube videos or the site is using my camera and commenting on the fact that I need a shower and some serious concealer. Back to scrolling.
r/funny - The only suggested one that I kept.
r/NatureIsFuckingLit - F-bombs and pretty pics? YES.
I ignore the whole Art section because I have a serious complex about how inept I am at this aspect of creativity.
r/ThriftStoreHauls - Yaaaahhhhhhhs
I ended up signing up for 11 subs total. Then of course it declared my Captcha was not valid. I guess I didn't click it hard enough? Or maybe I am a robot. Plot twist!
After cycling back through and blessing the fact that I took notes for this blog which meant I had most of the subreddits I wanted written down, I finally was finished signing up! I did it!First post on my feed...a promoted one. Seriously? They ARE everywhere aren't they?
Second thing I notice is I have "1 Karma". WTF is that? Hopefully it's good karma. I can't handle bad karma right now. Turns out you get more karma points when you post, or when shit you post is upvoted. (whatever that is)
I'll be staying with the 1 karma for a while. I always lurk for a significant amount of time before I post in any new group or on any platform. Mainly because I have seen far too many people crash and burn due to blazing in and spamming shit everyone knows is a big No No.
The subs are easy to click through and sort, and NGL, I spent a good thirty minutes on r/ThriftStoreHauls. That shit is my jam!
In the end, I'm signed up. We'll see if it's a time suck or if I have a way to kill a few minutes that aren't consumed with FB drama when I'm in need of phone scrolling in public places. Are you on Reddit? Are there any subreddits I need to know about? I'd love to hear about them!
~Roxy
January 25, 2019
ROBOSEX: More than Boning and Bolts
I've been tagged in lots of post shares of articles revolving around everything from mechanical men and their bionic penises to killer female AI sex dolls. For anyone who traveled to my site for my ventures into Miracle Mornings or my planner challenges, you might be arching an eyebrow at my mentions.Here's the thing. I don't think sex is bad, and I think there is a lot of questioning we need to do about labels in general. I love playing with both in the books I write. While I do write about robots getting it on in Virgin on Human and Interlocking Hearts, anyone who has read my books will see the themes aren't about how many buttons you need to press to get your man's dick to vibrate.
In Virgin on Human I wanted to explore a character that got to experience sex without the guilt the society I grew up in gave me. Trust me...I went to Catholic School. I minored in guilt.
I wanted to show a character who could enjoy everything about her body and how it felt as she began to explore it. The story isn't long, but I wanted to focus only on her sexual awakening. And making her a robot seemed like a great way to accomplish the inquisitive nature and innocence while still realizing this was someone who had enough experience in the world to go after what she wanted.
I chat about a lot of this on the podcast I did with Karen Greco when the book first came out in its first life as Coral-600. That was the title while I was still at Samhain Publishing. (I was episode 6 of the Atomic Words podcast.) Our chat got deep about erotic romance as a genre in general. If you haven't listened to it, I have to say, it's a great way to spend an hour.
The second book, Interlocking Hearts, went further into how the government was blocking who could get married, and outlawing relationships at a contractual level between couples who weren't the norm. In my book it was "humans" and "robots" getting together, but it doesn't take a genius to make the connection between the scenarios in my book and the fight for same sex marriage that was being fought around that time in the United States.
One of the beautiful things about writing for me is finding a way to express the emotions at the heart of issues I'm passionate about. My first book revolved around the immediate punch to the gut I got from realizing my now-husband was the man I wanted forever. The story came to life around that.
Sometimes authors are just out to make a fun book, but as you read material from certain people, you find core characteristics that they can't help but put into their stories. Some write about people they admire, some share stories that touched them, and some want to celebrate life with pure laughter or sexual tension.
I think it's an incredible thing to read something someone put out into the world. Because no matter how hard we try to cover up with fancy plot and character development arcs, in the end, every author ends up butt naked on the page showing you a bit of their own truth.
After reading Mary Hughes and Sophie Oak, I knew instinctively that both women were beautiful souls. And I actually connected with both of them in person, only to realize how right I was.
What authors have you read that showed you something beautiful through an unexpected story? I'd love to hear about it. My TBR always needs fed. Keep reading below for a short excerpt from Virgin on Human .
~Roxy
VIRGIN ON HUMANExcerpt from Book 1 of The DMA Files
All of my preparation went out the window when Quinn entered the kitchen as I cleaned up the remaining dishes.
“Quinn, you missed dinner. Should I prepare something for you? The chefs have left, but I am programmed with basic culinary skills.” I put the dish back into the soapy water and dried my hands on the dish towel I had slung over my shoulder.
“Are you really going out with Paisley to get laid tonight?” He asked me with his hands on his hips. His manner was very confrontational.
“That does not answer my question about the food.”
“I want an answer to my question first.” He folded his arms over his chest. His forearms flexed and I admired the musculature under his skin. I wondered if any of his arms were mechanics.
“I was planning on dancing more. I was not planning on lying down.”
He exhaled and dropped his arms. “Then yes, I would love a sandwich.”
I prepared him a sandwich and removed some of the fennel salad to put on his plate as well. I waited for him to make noises of contentment around his meal before I continued the conversation. “I will, however, have sex should the opportunity arise. I find myself anticipating the opportunity to have another orgasm.”
Quinn began choking. He had inhaled his sandwich. That was no way to process nutrients. I walked behind him and slapped him on the back to break up any large particles in his airway. He sputtered and made noises, but drank the water I put in front of him and seemed to recover nicely.
I would have given him the Heimlich maneuver, but I found myself wanting to touch him in other places and it would not have been easy to keep my hands in the proper position.
“Coral, you can’t go pick up men and have sex with them.”
“I will do my best to give them an orgasm as well. I want to make sure the experience is satisfactory for all parties involved.” I went back to the dishes. Quinn should have been satisfied now that I had explained I would not be seeking only my pleasure.
He wasn’t.
“That’s not what I am getting at.” He got up and stood right behind me. My skin felt warmer even without him touching me. Was there some kind of strange reaction that our systems had with each other?
I pulled the drain as I set the last clean dish in the drying rack and turned towards the man behind me. I was going to explain that this was not negotiable. I was going to explain that just because I was mechanics didn’t mean I couldn’t give and receive this kind of pleasure.
I had all of the words in queue to be processed through my vocal chords. Then Quinn gripped me by my upper arms and leaned in to kiss me. His lips pressed against mine. His body pushed mine up against the sink behind us.
I’d never been more uncomfortable in my maid’s uniform. I wanted all of it off. Quinn couldn’t touch my pussy with my stockings and underwear on. He needed to touch my pussy. I felt myself getting wet at the thought of him touching me like he did last night. I pressed my hips against his. That’s when I knew there were mechanics in both his arms, because he held me tight.
His tongue slipped against my lips. I opened my mouth to ask him why he was licking me on my face when he could have been licking my pussy again. Instead of my argument my tongue was busy wrapping and sliding around Quinn’s. This felt good too.
I lifted my hands to his chest and gripped his shirt to pull him closer. When he realized I was not going to push him away he released my arms and wrapped his strong limbs around me. One hand rose to grip the French twist in my hair and move my head where he wanted while he kissed me. The other hand went lower and gripped my ass. He pressed my body harder against his. I liked that.
His erection pressed against my stomach and I wanted to have sex even more. If my pleasure receptors were firing off this much data at the touch of his penis on my belly… through all these layers of clothes…I wanted to have sex. Immediately.
January 24, 2019
A night out in my early twenties Vs. A night out in my late thirties
I went out for a rare visit into the outside world past six pm. There were a couple of stark differences I noticed now that I am pushing forty.
Early 20's Me:
I'm not heading out until at least ten pm. I need to pre-party and save some cash to buy some Steak N' Shake so I can sober up before coming home. Late 30's Me:
Yikes. I have to work the next day. Can we go out for an early dinner and just have drinks while we're there? I'll have a drink, but I'd better eat something with it so I don't get drunk.Early 20's Me:
Let's plan this out. If we start out with four shots of cheap tequila, we can maintain the buzz with whatever's on sale.Late 30's Me:
They don't have my favorite beer on tap? I guess I'll buy the top shelf cocktail and sip on that instead.Early 20's Me:
They better have a band or an awesome DJ. And if we don't have to scream, it's not loud enough!Late 30's Me:
Live music? We need to make sure we're gone before it starts otherwise we won't be able to hear a thing!Early 20's Me:
What's the theme for the party? We need to shop for costumes. I've got a few things I can use, but I can't be shown up again. Can you believe we were the only ones without our hair crimped at the 80's party?Late 30's Me:
Nope. I'm not spending all that money because someone wants cute Instagram pics. They're lucky I'm showering. If they didn't want me to show up as I am, then they wouldn't have invited me.And last but not least....Early 20's Me:
Hell yeah, I'll have one more!Late 30's Me:
It's past my bedtime.
You could say I'm feeling old, but in reality, I'm just enjoying different aspects of the night life. You know...the ones in my jammies watching videos with a glass of wine in my hand.
My time out with my friends is more precious, and frankly, I want to remember it. Company and catching up beats a buzz and a hangover for me now. And while I enjoy seeing the sparkle in hubby's eyes when I look nice, I'm not going to put on a goofy costume or wear a themed outfit for someone else's Pinterest-Perfect party.
I'm pretty awesome as I am, and I'd rather hang at the bar with a beer shooting the shit for a few hours than pounding shots and avoiding being groped on a dance floor.
Have you noticed a difference in your nights out as you've gotten older? Or am I just reaching the "get off my lawn" level a little early? I'd love to hear about it.
~Roxy
Early 20's Me:
I'm not heading out until at least ten pm. I need to pre-party and save some cash to buy some Steak N' Shake so I can sober up before coming home. Late 30's Me:
Yikes. I have to work the next day. Can we go out for an early dinner and just have drinks while we're there? I'll have a drink, but I'd better eat something with it so I don't get drunk.Early 20's Me:
Let's plan this out. If we start out with four shots of cheap tequila, we can maintain the buzz with whatever's on sale.Late 30's Me:
They don't have my favorite beer on tap? I guess I'll buy the top shelf cocktail and sip on that instead.Early 20's Me:
They better have a band or an awesome DJ. And if we don't have to scream, it's not loud enough!Late 30's Me:
Live music? We need to make sure we're gone before it starts otherwise we won't be able to hear a thing!Early 20's Me:
What's the theme for the party? We need to shop for costumes. I've got a few things I can use, but I can't be shown up again. Can you believe we were the only ones without our hair crimped at the 80's party?Late 30's Me:
Nope. I'm not spending all that money because someone wants cute Instagram pics. They're lucky I'm showering. If they didn't want me to show up as I am, then they wouldn't have invited me.And last but not least....Early 20's Me:
Hell yeah, I'll have one more!Late 30's Me:
It's past my bedtime.
You could say I'm feeling old, but in reality, I'm just enjoying different aspects of the night life. You know...the ones in my jammies watching videos with a glass of wine in my hand.
My time out with my friends is more precious, and frankly, I want to remember it. Company and catching up beats a buzz and a hangover for me now. And while I enjoy seeing the sparkle in hubby's eyes when I look nice, I'm not going to put on a goofy costume or wear a themed outfit for someone else's Pinterest-Perfect party.
I'm pretty awesome as I am, and I'd rather hang at the bar with a beer shooting the shit for a few hours than pounding shots and avoiding being groped on a dance floor.
Have you noticed a difference in your nights out as you've gotten older? Or am I just reaching the "get off my lawn" level a little early? I'd love to hear about it.
~Roxy
