Ksenia Anske's Blog, page 29

I will be learning how to plot

Illustration by Eleanor Taylor

Two big things have happened this week that have signified to me a beginning of a new era. For me. A step-up in my writing process. An ascendance onto a new level (sounds grand, eh?).You know, like if you imagined climbing a mountain that had a series of staircases carved into it, each staircase ending in a big plat platform that you have to traverse to get to the next staircase. So when you start out, you think only about the steps, but when you get to the e...

The curse of being different

Illustration by Henn Kim

The more I read, the more I meet with other writers and talk, the more I realize that what I write is so different from what I see written around me today, that it makes me want to weep from terrible loneliness. I'd like to relate to someone, anyone, talk the same language, but my writing process is so strange (rewriting each draft from scratch every time, anyone?),my reading tastes so bizarre (Russian novels but in English, books written by writers long dead, absu...

Why I write, or the revolution of love

Illustration by Sveta Dorosheva

I was always told to ignore my emotions, to shove them down, to think about the emotions of others, to make sure the other people were happy before me. Partly it was the Soviet rearing of the loyal citizens devoted to the state as the state always came first, partly the grooming of a female to fulfill a servile role in her future patriarchal family, and partly it was the upbringing of my parents and the other parental figures in my life who themselves were e...

What else can I do to get better?

Illustration by Sara Herranz

I'm in some kind of a rut these last few days. Maybe I've made a leap with Janna? Somehow crossed over to a higher level of writing? Or maybe it's just wishful thinking,an illusion. Or maybe the idea of sandwiching drafts from two different novels was a big fat mistake...whatever the reason, I can't shake off the feeling of dismay and disappointment and disgust when I got done reading the third draft of TUBE. When I was writing it, I was so excited about the wh...

TUBE is TYUBIK now, and here is the first chapter

Image source

The scariest thing to do in writing is trusting your story, or so I'm learning. TUBE started out as a joke of sorts. I didn't really intend to write a book about a train, but then I applied for the Amtrak Residency, and I thought, "Why not? Easy-peasy. I can do it. I won't win it anyway." But then I I did win, and dammit, I had to deliver. Well, I did. I wrote something-something about an American train, and something-something about Bolshoi ballerinas, and something-something...

Why take a long break between drafts

Illustration by Lee Kyutae

I started reading Draft 3 of TUBE yesterday, in preparation for Draft 4, and I was astounded by how easy it was to see where the story was trying too hard and where I was trying too hard, and to make mental notes on cutting out those bits without mercy (I no longer write on Post-it notes like I used to, I don't follow them anyway).

I finished writing Draft 3 on March 21st. Today is June 28th, so about three months have passed. That's a significant break compared t...

I've been called a dangerous idealist

Illustration by Michela Picchi

In the light (darkness?) of what just happened in the UK, and of what's happening in America with the whole election circus, and of what's happened a long time ago in Russia beginning with Lenin, hell, even before that, and of what continues to happen now under Putin,whenever I try to understand the global politics charade and voice what I think, my opinion proves highly unpopular. The "dangerous idealist" epithet at least has the word "dangerous" in it. Some...

12 books to read if you liked Irkadura

"What books have you read like Irkadura? I really loved it." — Katherine

Dear Katherine, I'm ecstatic that you loved it!Irkadura is not an easy book to love. People either love it to death, or can't read it at all.I have already sent you a list via email, but then I thought, "Wait a minute. This is a great list to share with my readers." So here you go, darlings.The books below are not exactly like Irkadura, and many have made a powerful impact on the world literature unlike Irkadura, which h...

Saw the most embarrassing dream...

Illustration by Luke Pearson

I was appointed a defense attorney (me? a defense attorney??) to a young gay man who has been somehow unjustly convicted of something and it had something to do with him being gay. I assured him that we will win, that those homophobic sons of bitches will remember this case as the one where they get their faces rubbed in shit (I was pleasantly pissed in the dream, and so of course lots of expletives), and then I needed to go pee (of course), and when I left for...

The freedom of doing NOTHING

Illustration by Elise Gravel

It just now is hitting me that no matter how much stuff I do every day, there is always more stuff to do. I keep waiting for the day when there won't be any more stuff, when I can relax and do nothing, but the nasty thing just has this propensity to multiply like some kind of an alien virus, slowly and completely, enveloping me in this goo of "You better do it all, or else." Damn it.

I'm supposed to be taking three weeks off between drafts. Ha! You think I did...