M.J. Blehart's Blog, page 55

Can or Can’t Both Belong to You

Your belief in whether you can or can’t do a thing will dictate the outcome.

You are capable of just about anything you can think of.

I know that seems improbable. But it’s still the truth.

Henry Ford famously said,

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”

The truth of that statement tends to get lost on people.

If you think you can’t do something – you’re right.

If you think you can do something – you’re right.

That may seem uber-simplistic. But it IS that simple.

Human beings have a madness for over-complicating things. This is evident both with the big-picture and on a personal level.

Simple: Wear a mask to lessen the output of germs when you breathe to lessen the spread of COVID-19 (among other things).

Complicated: Mask-wearing is a form of tyranny. I read somewhere online how masks make you breathe in too much CO2. I read somewhere that masks are pointless and don’t do much of anything for anyone.

These two statements coexist right now. The simple statement is one of fact. The complicated statement is not. Yet rather than believe the simple statement – people cling to the much more complicated one.

Why? Because over the years, skepticism has devolved into cynicism, which has become embedded in the collective consciousness. With the rise of instantaneous communications, fact, and counterfact interact so closely that telling one from the other is exhausting.

Too many unreliable narrators are loud and convincing – despite having no basis in reality.

The skepticism and cynicism of the collective consciousness make the pursuit of personal goals a lot more complicated than it needs to be.

Focusing outwards and inwards

Too many people focus outwards. You turn to this resource, look to that demagogue, seek another’s idea, and means to get from where you are to where you prefer to be.

What’s more, many of these outward matters are quick fixes. Instant gratification. Take the pill, drink the shake, listen to the self-help recording.

That’s not to say there isn’t SOME value in all of these. But they do neglect the true starting point of any change.

You.

Everything you desire begins within. If you want to be healthier, smarter, faster, or what-have-you – it starts within. The idea and goal evolved inside YOUR head.

The resolve to make a change is internal.

Every smoker I know who has quit for good quit cold turkey. No drug or nicotine gum made them quit. Everyone I know who has turned to a prescription, vaping, or nicotine gum has failed at quitting.

Why? Because they turned outside for something that must come from within. A decision. You choose to quit smoking. End of story.

I need to take off some weight. I know there are diet programs and pills available to help me with this. However, unless I make very specific choices to change my diet and exercise habits – nothing will happen.

Can or can’t is on me. The choice is mine. And the place where I can find any answer is within.

While numerous resources exist outside of myself to help me – the action must come from within. Reliance on the external is uncertain. That’s because you have ZERO control over external matters.

Can or can’t is in your control

To be fair, there are things some people are incapable of doing. For example, I’d love to be able to do a standing backflip. That’s not happening.

If I REALLY wanted to, however, there is training I could undergo to make that possible – but it takes focus, intent, and deep desire.

This is true of everything in life. But for a lot of people, they don’t entirely know what they desire. They have a vague idea of what they want – but no clarity.

That’s why it’s easy to overcomplicate simple matters. Because modern society and the collective consciousness tells you “can’t” way more often than “can.”

The negative gets way more attention than the positive. This can’t be done. That can’t be right. Nobody can do that. You can’t expect it to be so easy. These are too frequently responses to thoughts, ideas, and goals individuals express.

Often this comes from someone “looking out for you,” “in your best interest,” or intent on “keeping it real.” It can’t be done as far as I can see so don’t try and fail.

Of course, if you don’t attempt something – you’re guaranteed failure. If I never publish a single work I write – then I definitely will never become a best-selling author.

The choice tends to be much simpler than we make it. But because society has become more and more skeptical and cynical, the analysis goes almost too far. You look at the idea, turn it over a few times, look at it again, see the good AND the bad, analyze all of that – over and over – and then act.

Or not.

You can or can’t. That decision and choice belong to you.

Positivity versus negativity

Can is a positive statement. Can’t is negative.

True, can or can’t are sometimes interchangeable, depending on how you use them. You can see no possible way to do something is negative. You can’t not make this choice is positive. But that’s just language being its overcomplicated self.

The concepts are simple. Can is a statement of possibility and potential. Can’t is a statement of impossibility and lack.

This is an internal matter. What you believe – can or can’t – is. All the power to choose what that means lies inside of you.

Due to overcomplicating matters – plus skepticism and cynicism – the relative ease of choosing can or can’t becomes overwrought. Just because you think you can do something doesn’t mean there isn’t a ton of evidence that you can’t. But you have a choice as to how you look at and approach it.

Finally, there is an important matter to not be ignored. Sometimes you can’t do something. That’s not negative – it’s just a matter of reality.

I can’t be an astronaut. That’s because I have taken no paths in life that would get me there. Also, I don’t want to be an astronaut.

You can do virtually anything you set your mind to. But be mindful. If you have tried over and over and over again – with the same result or lack therein – reconsider. Not that you are unable to do what you’re trying. But maybe you need to take a different approach. Or maybe figure out if you truly desire what you are pursuing.

It’s easy to convince yourself you desire something you don’t. What you can and can’t do get tied into that. So, it’s not that you can’t change – maybe, in truth, you don’t want to.

Choosing can or can’t isn’t hard

It does require mindfulness of your beliefs, thoughts, feelings, actions, and intent.

Knowing that you have a choice – and can decide what you do and do not desire – you can also see that can or can’t are based within you. When you recognize this truth, you’ll make clearer choices and decisions for where you desire your life to go – and that ultimately empowers you.

When you feel empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that can spread to people around you. This can create a feedback loop of awareness and positivity.

You can build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That can be the impetus to improve numerous aspects of your life for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of the current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of immense positivity. That positivity can generate even more good energies – and that, like you, is always worthwhile.

This is the three-hundred and forty-seventh entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all of my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive a free eBook.

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The post Can or Can’t Both Belong to You appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

The Normal Has Not Always Been Normal

The normal of today is less than 75 years old.

Why does this matter? Because too many people expect and react poorly to what is normal and not normal. Way, way too much unnecessary conflict is a product of this.

The current average American lifespan is a shade more than 78 years. In everybody’s life, they will have unique experiences. What you will experience along the way is different from what I’ll experience.

When it comes to the world stage, during our lifetime we will see anywhere from 10-20 United States Presidents, the economy will rise and fall continuously, and other world governments will be reshaped again and again.

I believe that since after WWII, we settled into the current normal. While that normal used be more favorable to the common person, since the 1980s it’s been tilted towards the ultra-wealthy.

After WWII, the taxation of the rich created a national infrastructure second to none, and the nation prospered. We established a nice, level normal where you could gain and grow – for the most part.

Yes, there was a tremendous amount of other social inequality that needed to be repaired. It would take several more decades to start creating more equality for blacks, women, LGBTQA, other people of color, and so on.

No, the process is NOT complete in this area – but we’ve come a long way since the 1950s.

Because we live in a fear-based society – which got seriously bolstered by the Cold War – change frightens people. Despite it being inevitable and constant, rejecting change – especially something that defies the normal – leads to conflict.

The collective consciousness and the normal

While your consciousness is unique to you, it still contributes to the collective consciousness.

The collective consciousness works on many different levels. Small groups, such as friends and family; to larger groups like towns and cities; on to still larger groups, like religions and nationalities. This is how we get the regional attitude differences across the United States. The people of the Midwest are different from the Northeast who are different from the Deep South and so on.

When you have an overarching expectation of normal based on a specific ideal – meeting it is automatically challenging. If, for example, the normal is working a 9-5 job, being married, and having 2 kids and a dog – I’m in defiance of that.

This idea of normal is still what many people cling to. Yet, realistically, that’s not normal for very many people at all. Of all my friends, I can think of maybe one couple living that life. A few others are close, but not living that precise variation on normal.

When change is afeared and we cling to a false normal, the collective consciousness experiences an upheaval. That is why Trump’s followers cling to the utter lie he has projected for himself. It matches the false narrative they want desperately to believe.

While there are numerous viewpoints even among the collective consciousness, two are dominant right now. The first seeks to hold onto a reality that has never truly existed – but is the expected normal. The second seeks to make progress towards a fairer, more equal society where people care more about each other than themselves.

When you know you are breaking away from the normal, you know there is going to be conflict. That can come on multiple levels, too.

The not-so-fine line between self-care and selfishness

Caring for yourself – and I am not writing about massages, spa treatments, or cosmetic surgery – is about taking care of yourself. When all is said and done self-care is about treating yourself with kindness, compassion, and even affection.

Ultimately, self-care is not selfish. Why? Because when you are kind to yourself, compassionate towards yourself, you tend to share that with others. You may become more open, and more attuned to how other people are feeling. Since being kind and compassionate to yourself is how you wish to be treated by others – you turn that outside of yourself and treat others in that way.

Taking a break, turning off your phone, avoiding conflict with someone, eating a good meal, taking a hot bath, and similar acts are self-care. They are not selfish.

Selfishness is doing something for yourself at the cost of others. Demanding a haircut in the middle of a global pandemic lockdown is selfish because you don’t care about the potential impact on others. Not wearing a mask is selfish because you don’t care if you make someone else sick.

An act that ignores the wellbeing of others is selfish. When a big business pays executives millions in bonuses – but pays their employees minimum wage – that’s selfishness.

Self-care is care. Care of the self tends to foment care of and for others. Self-care gives.

Selfish is uncaring. Taking for you without any regard to or for others. Selfish takes.

The expected normal of our society is selfish because it ignores giving and focuses on taking.

Many bad examples

Too many of our so-called leaders today are prime examples of the selfishness of the normal.

Trump, McConnell, and most of their cohorts care for only their personal power. They tell their followers they are all for them – distracting them from the robberies they themselves are committing. They create a false “us” versus “them” to drive their points home. The selfish entitlement they create and project is an example of rampant, uncontrolled selfishness.

How many megachurches offer false salvation and preach a selfish prosperity gospel? I am not a Christian, but I have read and studied enough to know that vast swaths of what is done and said in the name of Christ would have offended the man. He preached tolerance, love, caring, and selflessness. Some very selfish preachers are making obscene money while their parishioners barely make ends meet.

Profit is the money you make over and above operating expenses. When that money is in the billions of dollars – how do you justify demanding tax cuts as anything but selfish? That money – which could be reinvested in the employees or used to improve operations – tends to line the pockets of a select few. Yet time and again we see the uber-wealthy take and take while giving nothing back.

The false narrative of the normal explains that they are entitled to that. Take for yourself and who cares what happens to anyone else?

The bad examples are not the majority

The above-mentioned bad examples are the minority. They just have the resources to be super-loud. Further, they raise the volume to try and drown-out everyone else.

The big picture is messy. Presently, it is made up of more fear and uncertainty than most of us have ever experienced before. But this is a moment in time when all is said and done. It will pass – and you get to decide what that looks like for you.

I gave up trying to live in the expected normal a long time ago. Because I made that choice, I have had a more difficult time fitting into the big-picture of this society. Yet I believe in my path, and I care as much about you as I do about myself.

Today’s normal wasn’t the normal a hundred years ago. The normal of 100 years ago wasn’t the normal from 100 years before that. Change is constant – but our technology has accelerated aspects of it. The gradual change of 50 years ago is instantaneous today.

That, however, leaves some people behind. Some people work to help them get caught up. But some exploit their feeling of being left behind for their own gain.

Normal today will not be normal tomorrow

The normal will change. It always does. You get to choose for yourself how that will impact you. That means you can decide to care for yourself and care for others with whatever you do. You can be one of the good examples for those around you.

You get to choose what normal looks like for you. It may be – in part – a reflection of the normal of the collective consciousness. But it might be something utterly different. That’s okay – because this normal will not be the normal forever.

Be mindful not just of your thoughts, feelings, and actions – but of how you impact others around you. Self-care tends to start inwards but then project outwards. When that becomes part of your normal, you can help make it part of the normal for those around you, too.

Consciousness creates reality. I know what I would rather see for myself, the people I care about, and the world at large. That’s part of why I share my notions on these matters here.

The projected “new normal” of this time can and will pass. You and I have the power to speed that along for something better on the other side.

We are capable of so much more potential and possibility than the normal would expect. Exploring this is not selfish when you consider the impact of what you do on other people.

What do you want to do to experience that sort of new normal for yourself?

This is the four-hundred and fifty-seventh exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Additionally, I desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is availablehere. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

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The post The Normal Has Not Always Been Normal appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Are You Alive Today?

If you are reading this, you are alive. That’s huge – and a matter of tremendous positivity.

With the loss of one of the great champions of justice, many of my friends are feeling hopeless.

Let’s be honest – things are beyond distressing for just about everyone right now. The uncertainty is at levels I know I’ve never felt before. Even if you’ve had personal uncertainty, the general, collective uncertainty today is palpable.

We are still dealing with COVID-19 (and the steady 35,000+ new cases a day). There is a super-ugly election between a candidate that stirs little excitement – but offers hope – and another who stokes inappropriate fires – and lies constantly. Breonna Taylor’s murderers are still free. An utter hypocrite is responsible for the actions and inactions of the Senate.

That doesn’t even touch on anything happening outside of the United States.

All of this just makes the future nothing but uncertain. Nobody knows what is coming and nobody can predict accurately a damned thing. That stirs fear, hopelessness, anger, depression, and other negative emotions like they exist all by themselves today.

Except that they don’t. There are always choices available. You can always decide on things that will impact your life experience.

Are you live today? If so, you can choose for yourself how that looks.

Being mindful of the moment

Please take a second to answer these questions:

What are you thinking?How do you feel?What are you feeling?What is your plan for the day?

Please pause and answer these aloud. Hell, write them down right now, if you can.

In the moment you answer these questions you are mindful. To answer these questions, you become conscious of your headspace/mindset/psyche. That is awareness.

You’re alive – which means you are capable of being mindful of where you are, who you are, how you are, and what you are doing. If you dislike the answers to any of the above questions – you can change them.

What you think, how you feel, what you feel, and actions you choose to take belong to you. You have the control to make choices for how your life is.

Taking in all the negative energy from the collective consciousness is disheartening. It’s hard not to feel the uncertainty, fear, and anger. Subconsciously, you absorb all of it without any filters.

This is why taking a moment to be aware and mindful is so valuable. It opens you to the filters you need to choose your thoughts and feelings – rather than be bombarded and overwhelmed by the collectives’.

Mindfulness of the moment shows your true headspace. That allows you to recognize where you are – and what options are available to you.

Being alive is all about possibility

I know you may be in a bad position. Perhaps you are unemployed and struggling to make ends meet. Maybe you have a job- but it is crushing your soul. You might have kids risking COVID-19 exposure at school. Maybe you are unsure how to work your job and remote learning for your kids at the same time. You might be feeling down and distressed.

That’s a part of life. There are struggles, challenges, and bad days. You may be utterly unsure of how to get from here to there – whatever that means to you. It may seem hopeless, useless, and utterly not worth it.

I get that. I’ve been there – so I understand completely. There are days I am enraged by all this madness. Also, there are days I feel hopeless.

However, through it all, I know that just being alive, here and now, is amazing. Maybe today sucks, perhaps tomorrow looks no better. But that doesn’t mean there is not possibility nor potential for change.

That’s where being mindful in this moment can help. Unless you are in immediate dire straits, you have possibility. There are options. You can choose differently.

While there is a very limited number of things you can do for the big-picture issues – your life is wholly your own. Hence, you can decide to choose for your life ways and means to make it what you desire it to be.

If you are alive – and I’m going to assume you are if you’re reading this – the potential is yours. The possibilities are virtually infinite.

Look within, not without

In our quick-fix instant-gratification society, we tend to look outside ourselves for things.

All advertising is trying to sell this to you. Buy the car and be more attractive to the opposite sex. Drink the wine to show off how classy you are. Wear the outfit to show how intelligent you are. Consume, damn you!

Hence, we frequently look outside of ourselves for validation, acceptance, and affirmation of our character. Thus, where we fit inside the big-picture and collective consciousness matters more than it should.

We are, each of us, individuals. Nobody but you is in your head, just as I’m the only one in mine. Every single person has their own unique perception of reality, as such.

Our individual realities come together in groups of varying sizes to form the collective consciousness. The inner bits together are still internal – despite external “appearances.”

All the power that appears to be without begins within. The collective is nothing but a gathering of all those together.

That’s why, by and large, power is an illusion. It’s either been projected or drawn-in by those who hold it.

That power comes from you. Your thoughts, feelings, and actions, likewise, come from you, too. That’s why looking within shows you more potential and possibility than you may readily realize.

You are alive. That means that you are capable of choices if you are not in a good place right now. Every little bit counts – so make the choices in the moment that can shift you out of the negative.

We have resources and tools unlike any time in history before. If you are alive today you have endless potential. When you feel negative – take that to heart, be mindful, and make new choices and decisions for change – because you can.

Being alive seems hard sometimes

But via thought, feeling, and action – the possibilities are endless

Knowing that you are alive, and you contribute to the collective consciousness – you can choose your thoughts, feelings, and actions for yourself. When you realize that power comes from within, not from without, you can see how there is virtually endless potential and possibility. That ultimately empowers you.

When you feel empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that can spread to people around you. This can create a feedback loop of awareness and positivity.

You can build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That can be the impetus to improve numerous aspects of your life for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of the current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of immense positivity. That positivity can generate even more good energies – and that, like you, is always worthwhile.

This is the three-hundred and forty-sixth entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all of my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive a free eBook.

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.Name *FirstLastEmail *WebsiteSubmit

The post Are You Alive Today? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Who Cares About What Path You’re On?

You care. Still, others who care can be a mirror reflecting something you need to see.

I have no idea what path anyone else in this world is on.

Sometimes it’s obvious. More often, it is not. Yet even when your path is apparent to me – I haven’t any idea what it is.

That’s because I cannot get inside your head. Of course, conversely, you can’t get into mine, either.

So, who cares? That doesn’t really matter – to a point. And that’s because what matters is that you care about your path.

Your path belongs to you and you alone. Whatever that might be, nobody else can choose it nor walk it for you.

Even if you let someone else suggest your path, you still make the choice to take it. Or not.

One of the biggest challenges with any path you choose is other people. Everyone will react in their own way to anything you do. Some approve, some don’t.

Lots of people will opine on your choices. Some of their opinions will be good and useful. Of course, many won’t.

What matters most is that you be true to you. Your path belongs to you and nobody else.

Why does it matter who cares?

Because most of us need validation. Or at least, we desire to make good impressions. Even when you do something specifically for yourself, you want approval.

This tends to be fine when you choose something conventional. Any standard 9-5 job with a future, something with room for advancement. The standard Jewish Mother Approved careers – doctor, lawyer, business mogul. All of these paths are “normal” and easily approved of.

When you choose an unconventional path – there will be more criticism. People will tell you (usually under the guise of “for your own good”) their thoughts.

Did you consider the lack of earning potential with that choice? Have you thought about how you lose everything if you fail? Do you realize how few succeed in that business?

I am all too aware of this myself. Though I know every time I hear this that it’s well-intentioned, it still feels less so.

I have an underlying fear of abandonment. If I succeed or fail, I’m afraid people will not want to be associated with me.

Logically, I know that friends and friendships change. Change is the only constant in the universe, after all. Also, the people I am presently closest to will likely only leave me if I become abusive. Or cruel. Or if I start intentionally hurting others and being a dick.

That’s where it does matter who cares. If you cannot see that in your quest to walk a given path you’re being a dick – those who care about you can help.

It is possible to unintentionally turn into an asshole in pursuit of a goal.

Don’t just ignore the comments and warnings people share. Examine them, reflect on them – and choose to take them in or release them.

Intent should be considered

When you have chosen a given path – or not – intent is important.

The choices you make belong to you and you alone. But in the pursuit of a given path your intent matters. That’s because if you strive to do good and be a good person – you may still cause hurt.

Nobody is perfect. Everyone screws up. What you choose to do – or not do – is about you. However, you have no control over the reactions of others.

You think, feel, and act for you and you alone. There is nobody else in your head. Nobody but you can be mindful of you. This is a good thing when you give it some consideration. Nobody desires to be the puppet of another.

Yet when you allow your subconscious mind to do the driving – you may let someone else drive. The ideas, the emotions you are employing unconsciously might be built off of false impressions. That’s how cults form, FYI.

But I digress. Good intentions are imperfect. This is because you have no control over the impression you make on another or their reactions. If another feels that you are being an ass – and you are not intentionally being an ass – you may be unable to appease them.

Know your intent. But don’t be surprised is someone who cares – and feels slighted – comments unexpectedly. Knowing your intent will show you if you should take their commentary to heart. Or it will show you if you should release it.

The fine line between selfish and self-aware

The pandemic has exposed a great many entitled people. Their privilege, their self-righteousness, and outright selfishness have come under the spotlight.

Wearing a mask is poo-pooed by some as weakness and being a puppet. But most of us see wearing a mask as a necessary inconvenience to protect other people.

Still, it is disheartening to see so many people showing their selfish colors like the plumage of a peacock.

Overall, the difference between selfish and self-aware lies in intent. But there is more to it than that. You need to also consider other people in the choices you make. Everything you do, great or small, impacts the world around you.

Not to the degree of, say, Trump and his blatant science-denial. But when you decide to not socially distance or wear a mask in a store – you show your entitlement. You make it clear your intent is all about you.

A very small number of people live at the upper levels of government and big-business leadership. Yet we frequently put them on pedestals or use them as examples. Unfortunately, present entitlements and privilege are a lot louder than reason and logic – and many of them are bad examples.

You have the power to look at what you are doing and decide if you are acting selfishly. One way to do so is to analyze how it would make you feel were someone else acting as you are acted in the same manner towards you.

Some of the acts of self-care are selfish. But intent matters here. Not talking a call, taking a day off work, or canceling an appointment for your mental health is not the same as refusing to wear a mask in a store.

The line was thin before COVID-19. It’s much more so, now.

Mindfulness, who cares, and why it matters

The practice of mindfulness is a quintessential part of the philosophy of Pathwalking. If you are not mindful, you’re not aware. You’re not conscious of your thoughts, feeling, and actions if you’re not mindful – let alone any intent.

Who cares? In this case, you care. Still, others who care can be a mirror reflecting something you need to see. Unless you are a narcissist or a sociopath, you likely desire to do good. Good for yourself tends to be beneficial to other people, too.

Yes, people will criticize, comment, and potentially frustrate you. It matters because they can be mirrors reflecting what you are doing. If that reflection angers, upsets or scares you – maybe you should reconsider your path.

If that reflection is as you expect it to be, however – you need to choose to ignore what you receive. Or you need to choose to say “thank you” but not act. Maybe just acknowledge and move on. There are many choices, and your relationship to and with the person(s) commenting impacts them.

Who cares what path you are on? You care. And that’s who matters when it comes to who cares. Nobody else can live life for you. Still, others who care can be a mirror reflecting something you need to see. You don’t live in a vacuum.

Recognize your intent. Be mindful of your conscious self. Strive to do good and forgive yourself if you screw it up from time to time. Recognize who cares and how the mirror they hold up to you matters in the moment.

How do you show your caring when commenting on the paths of others?

This is the four-hundred and fifty-sixth trek through my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Additionally, I desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.Name *FirstLastEmail *NameSubmit

The post Who Cares About What Path You’re On? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Is Optimism Inappropriate Now?

Optimism is never misplaced or inappropriate. But it needs to be in the context of reality.

Optimism in the world today seems like a Pollyanna, rose-colored glasses, unrealistic attitude.

In the United States, we are still in the middle of an out-of-control pandemic; an utterly disheartening and frustrating election; a government that cares way more about the money than the people; out-of-control, militarized police forces murdering indiscriminately – and getting away with it; a President obsessed with dictators and hoping to become one himself; and a whole host of other insanity.

It feels very doom-and-gloom. Further, it feels a lot like optimism in the face of it is ridiculous.

Except that it’s not.

There are three facts to take into consideration as to why optimism is not ever inappropriate.

1. We live in a fear-based society

One of the reasons we’re all hyper-aware of the above issues is because this is a fear-based society in which we live. Fox News is all about hyping the fears of their viewers and making them MORE afraid. To a different and less-intentional degree, the rest of the media also hypes fear – because fear sells.

How often is the news – whatever form you consume it in – negative? This war, that disease, this horrid leader, that criminal, and on and on. It stokes the fires and makes people reactionary.

Business is often modeled this way. My wife, for example, spends 2/3 of her day putting out fires. This is largely due to poor planning and quick sales without forethought – and insufficient staff – dealing with unhappy customers. Everything is a crisis. And if you don’t meet the crisis head-on – jobs will be lost, people will be fired – or at least that’s what the fear is.

Fear sells and then is used to disempower.

One of the best ways to combat this – besides reason – is optimism. A little optimism in the face of all the fear is a light in a dark room.

The form of optimism I am writing about I’ll explain further ahead. But a fear-based society easily gives way to pessimism. And the best weapon against pessimism is optimism.

2. Consciousness creates reality

I know a lot of people disbelieve in this. Also, the whole notion gets abused and misrepresented in many ways. That, however, doesn’t make it any less true.

Consciousness creates reality. If you go into things expecting them to be shit – they will be. When you approach something expecting failure – you have set that up.

A long time ago, I drove with my sister to her first college. It was across the country from home. Before reaching the state her school was in, she was already talking about how she expected it to suck.

Spoiler alert – it did. After a semester at that college, she departed it.

If all the doom-and-gloom of the world gets into your head, it’s easy to feel pessimistic. Then your consciousness is inclined to create an undesirable reality. Hey, if you want to continue along this destructive path – who am I tell you otherwise?

Nobody wants to see it all burn. Okay, almost nobody. But knowing that consciousness creates reality, a little optimism opens you to better creation.

3. You have more power than you realize

One of the reasons this is a fear-based society is because of those “in power.” It may be fictional, but the Tarkin Doctrine from Star Wars sure as hell looks like modern government and business practices.

“Fear will keep the local systems in line.”

In government, that’s how they maintain power. Follow me or the “other” you fear will ruin your life. Of course, the irony is that those who say that are the ones actively doing things that are ruining your life. They distract while taking away your way of life for their own gain.

When it comes to business, that’s how they control workers. Toe the line or get demoted. Or have your pay get docked. Never mind that, toe the line or we fire you. And then you lose your health benefits. I know multiple people only doing their jobs because not working means they can’t maintain their lives.

So-called leaders squash optimism and use fear to maintain their power. And fear means you are frequently reacting – which makes being proactive difficult at best.

All these things are intended to disempower you. Why? Because if you feel disempowered you won’t consciously create a different reality.

Hence why optimism is never inappropriate. Because if you give in to pessimism and fear – then they win. The world burns and we wind up in one of those awful dystopian realities common to sci-fi books and films.

I don’t know about you – but living in a dystopia isn’t appealing to me.

When you are mindful and employ optimism – even in small doses – it helps give us options to move away from undesirable possibilities.

Realistic optimism

Isn’t that a contradiction in terms? No, not at all.

Take the Black Lives Matter (BLM) movement. If you believe the false statements around it, they are seeking to foment anarchy. Defunding the police makes us into a lawless society. All they want is to destroy for their gain.

But that’s not their message at all. They want the police held accountable. Breonna Taylor’s killers – because that’s what they are – still walk free. Almost weekly, a new story of an unarmed black person being shot – while armed white people walk around freely – hits the news.

What BLM is after is a positive change. Defunded police forces are not made toothless – they’re remade to serve and protect as was the original intent. It makes them into community servants rather than enforcers.

The whole notion of BLM is optimistic. They believe that the current situation can be made better.

Along this line, I am seeing a lot of advertisements for the coming presidential election. And this is a perfect example of optimism versus fear.

Biden’s messages are optimistic – we can work together and beat this pandemic. We can work together to make the economy work for us.

The messages from Trump? They will destroy your way of life. All they care about is anarchy and they will make everything worse. Be afraid, damn you.

I know which message I would rather partake of. The builder, not the destroyer.

If you fall for the pessimistic view of the world – you are adding that to the collective consciousness of the community. That does nobody any good, does it?

Realistic optimism is based entirely in reality. Take what is and change it to what can be. That is realistic optimism.

Is optimism inappropriate now?

Never. Optimism opens you to see potential and possibility in the world.

A little optimism is the difference between seeing a world on fire – and holding a fire extinguisher. When you have optimism, that can lead to more positivity. And the world needs more positivity.

I know it seems like this is misplaced. Yes, I know it can be a tough row to hoe. But believe me, optimism is not only never inappropriate, but helpful. Being more optimistic opens you to conscious reality creation and controlling inevitable change.

No, this is not a quick fix. But that’s because there is NEVER a quick fix. A little optimism is a little positivity. And every bit counts.

Finally – how do you want this to come out? Consider that before you poo-poo or otherwise dismiss realistic optimism.

Being optimistic isn’t hard, but it does require thought, feeling, and action.

Knowing that optimism can help direct change away from bad and towards good, does it make sense to ignore it? When you have optimism, you give yourself the ability to take a better approach to seeing a world of possibility and potential – rather than hopelessness and lack. That ultimately empowers you.

When you feel empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that can spread to people around you. This can create a feedback loop of awareness and positivity.

You can build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That can be the impetus to improve numerous aspects of your life for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of the current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of immense positivity. That positivity can generate even more good energies – and that, like you, is always worthwhile.

This is the three-hundred and forty-fifth entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all of my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

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The post Is Optimism Inappropriate Now? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

I’m More Lost than I Appear

Yes, there are plans afoot and paths I am on – but that doesn’t mean I am not lost, too.

How are you feeling?

I ask friends and loved ones this question frequently – but I do not ask this of myself nearly enough. Yet it is one of the quintessential questions of mindfulness.

What I am thinking, what, and how I am feeling are the most tangible elements of mindfulness – next to the intent behind my actions.

To be aware and conscious of what is happening within my mindset/headspace/psyche, certain questions are akin to opening doors and windows:

What am I thinking about?How am I feeling?What am I feeling?Why am I doing this, that, or the other thing?Where am I versus where do I desire to be?

Each of these question – especially when asked aloud – make me mindful.

Still, even when I ask them and get answers to them – that doesn’t mean I am not somewhat at a loss.

How am I lost?

Despite all that I do to walk my own path in life and live how I most desire to live, I still enjoy patterns.

Most people that I know have habitual patterns for their life. Some things take them out of that pattern from time to time, but overall, it drives them.

I do the same thing. Most days I get out of bed, make coffee, play a mindless game via Facebook, check email – write and/or post a blog. Go for a walk. Take a shower. Get dressed, spend the day writing, editing, working on a website – and/or – spend time at the office for the freelance gig. Dinner. TV. More online time, possibly writing, hopefully reading before bed. Rinse and repeat tomorrow.

Within my habitual pattern, I spend way too much time scrolling through Facebook, chatting on Messenger, checking and rechecking email, and feeling like I am not doing what I should be doing.

And what exactly should I be doing? That’s the question. And that is how I am lost.

I am writing and editing full-time. Yet it is still not paying my bills as well as I’d like it to be. To make it work for me better, I need to increase book sales and get more readers for my articles on Medium.

Over the past few weeks, since my freelance gig began its shift, I’ve been working on this. Yet I am not finding answers any different from most of what I am already doing.

Yes, I should redo my mailing list – but other than that? I am feeling lost. I really don’t know what I should do next.

Evaluating the path

It is probably a good idea to evaluate if this path that I am on is where I desire to be.

Do I still love writing? Yes. Does writing still make me happy? Yes. Am I writing enough? Maybe, but maybe not.

Underway right now is an edit of my 3rd fantasy novel, and I should be getting my standalone fantasy novel I intend to publish in December back from the editor any day now. Book 2 of my sci-fi series, The Void Incursion, is nearly ready for its November 9th release. I need to edit the 3rd book in the series and get it off to the editor for it’s May 2021 release – and I have been writing what will become book 4.

I write at least one blog article 5-6 days a week. And I am playing with a new story idea for another sci-fi series – planning my plot quite differently from my usual approach.

Yes, this still excites me. So how come I am feeling lost?

What expectations am I meeting?

I frequently write about not allowing outside influences to set expectations for you. Whose life is it anyway?

Still, it’s hard not to seek out meeting certain expectations. Money needs to be earned to have food, clothing, and shelter. Then you need items that are essentials, but to a lesser degree – mobile phones, computers and tablets, cars, and that kind of thing.

And let’s face it – I am well aware my privilege is showing with this statement – but it’s also REALLY nice to have non-essentials like art, collectibles, and various toys you could live without but would prefer not to.

When you are walking a non-standard path – particularly one not known to earn money easily – it’s easy to feel lost. Why? Because you are in uncharted territory.

Sure, others have blazed a similar trail – but not yours. Ergo, getting lost along the way is an inevitability.

I am not Neil Gaiman, Paulo Coelho, or Jen Sincero – but there was a time when each of them wasn’t someone blazing a similar trail that they admired, I have no doubt. If they can do it – why can’t I?

Yes, I need to contribute to my household. My wife expects me to earn my share to cover our expenses. That’s an expectation I desire to live up to because she is my partner.

The expectations of some friends and family desiring that I follow a more conventional path, however, isn’t mine to be met. Why? Because they are not me just as I am not them.

Does a conventional, 9-5 office job work for you? More power to you! That concept, however, really doesn’t work for me.

Though I choose my path, since it is full of unknowns – it’s no wonder I get lost at times.

Lost today is found tomorrow

If you are feeling lost along the way – you are not alone.

Everyone experiences this on one level or another. That’s just part of being human.

If you always know where you are going and what you are doing – does that stimulate growth and change? Nope. Even people who play it safe and take few to no risks will still get lost sometimes.

The important takeaway here is to recognize when you are feeling lost – and try to work out why. For example – why am I feeling lost? Because I am unsure how to proceed with promoting my books and getting more reads for my articles online.

How do I get found? I presume I need to do more research and explore further resources to take the next steps. Or – I need to find a mentor (preferably one I feel understands what I need and helps me achieve that – without breaking the bank in the process.)

The point is that lost today can be found tomorrow. It’s a choice – because if you don’t explore why and how you are lost you won’t easily find your way through.

Granted, you can make no choices or decisions – but odds are, you will remain lost as such.

Presently, with the collective consciousness facing so much uncertainty, dis-ease, fear, and a lack of knowing – feeling lost is all-too-common. There are so many factors in the air presently that it’s easy to get lost among them.

Yes, there are plans afoot and paths I am on – but that doesn’t mean I am not lost, too. Yet I am working on getting out of this feeling of being lost. Now that I recognize why and how – finding a way through is entirely up to me.

Are you feeling lost? If so, why – and how will you proceed?

This is the four-hundred and fifty-fifth trek through my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. Additionally, I desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is availablehere. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.Name *FirstLastEmail *WebsiteSubmit

The post I’m More Lost than I Appear appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

What Will You Learn Today?

Why is recognizing what you can and will learn today important?

There is always something new to be learned.

Recognizing this can make a huge difference in your life. When you think there is nothing you can do; if the world seems to be only negative; if you find you are at a loss – there is a chance to learn something new today.

What this means is that if you are stuck, displeased, distressed, frustrated, or otherwise not where you want to be there is something to learn today that can help you change.

Change is the only constant in the Universe. So why not learn how to make change work for you rather than against you?

No matter what is going on there is something you can learn. Hell, even when you don’t intend it you still tend to be learning.

Life is one big lesson

Nobody lives in a vacuum. To one degree or another everyone interacts with other people.

Some choose direct interactions. Conversations, meet-ups, and similar person-to-person (or persons) gatherings. Other people experience more indirect or passive interactions. Reading the news, memes, and posts on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, and even reading books.

These interactions – direct or indirect – offer learning opportunities. That might be something very minor and seemingly insignificant – or – it might be major and life-changing. Chances are, though, it will probably fall somewhere between these extremes.

What kinds of things do you learn?

Some of the things you learn from people are personal. How they are thinking and feeling, what they are doing, changes in their relationships, and so on. Other things you learn today may be more indirect. Another take on politics, philosophy, how to do things, and so on.

Frequently, what you learn is super-passive. You may not even recognize that you have learned something. But you have – and you do – every single day.

If I am watching a chef cook on the Food Network, I may learn a new technique, or how to make a barbecue rub, or why a fish spatula is amazing. Talking to you, I might learn how I desire for a relationship I have to be like yours or unlike yours. Reading posts on Facebook I may learn it’s a seriously toxic environment.

All of these are different types of lessons. But each is something that I can learn today that I didn’t know before.

No, none of these are necessarily earth-shattering or life-changing. But that doesn’t make them lesser. Each of thee lessons can lead to something a lot more important.

Mindfulness is something you learn today only

Mindfulness – awareness of your conscious mind in the here-and-now – is a TODAY matter. When you are mindful you are being present in the moment with your thoughts, feelings, and actions.

In a world where the collective consciousness tends to be as far from mindful as possible – mindfulness is an important lesson. Why? Because it gives you control over your subconscious.

That, in turn, allows you to make better choices – and rather than learn indirectly helps you better learn directly. Or, frankly, replace the word “learn” with “live.” Still a very accurate assessment.

When you are more mindful – ergo, more aware- you are can better see what you are learning today. When you have a better idea of what you are learning you can decide if these lessons add value to your life or not.

Remember, not everything that you learn is good. Further, some of the things that you learn are hurtful, harmful, and majorly negative. That, however, doesn’t mean they don’t serve you in some way or another. But what it does mean is that there is an insight to be had.

When you work with mindfulness you open yourself to choosing more actively what to learn today.

Learning to build positivity

Choosing to see the negative in the world is a choice. And right now, it’s a VERY easy choice. Between the pandemic, elections, social injustice, and inequality – negativity is everywhere. Soaking that up like a sponge is almost a consequence of everyone’s daily life experience.

However, what you learn today can help you change that.

I read a lot of self-help, inspirational, mindfulness, conscious reality creation, and similar self-improvement and life-lesson books and blogs. These offer me an opportunity to learn something that can help me live my life in the manner I most desire to.

Then I go and write this to share with you. I like to share what I learn because then I might have the opportunity to help YOU learn something new to make your life better.

All in all, this is a chance to learn today something to build more positivity in the world. For example, when you learn that mindfulness helps you make more informed choices about what you are thinking, what and how you are feeling, and the intention behind your actions – you can choose positive options over negative ones.

Recognizing that you are learning something new all the time is immensely positive. Why? Because that means that no matter what you are up against or what you are facing, there is something you can learn to impact that.

You can change where you are at, as well as where you are going.

Which brings me ‘round to the ultimate truth.

Change is the only constant in the Universe

Like it or not, change happens. When change comes you get to decide what to do with it.

Accept itResist it by throwing a tantrum and being upset about itResist it with an alternativeTake what control over it you can and work with itSeek another means to make another change

I have no doubt you might be able to think of other options – but these are some of the most basic and Universal.

However, that which you learn today can impact your reaction to change. It can make you see if you are being reactive or proactive.

The important takeaway here is to remember that you ALWAYS have choices and options available to you. That means there is something you can learn today to be more positive or find more positivity in the direction you take for your life.

You have so much more power than you realize. Maybe, what you learn today, is this truth – that you HAVE all this power and can take more charge over how you experience life.

Recognizing the power of what you learn today isn’t hard

But it does require thought, feeling, and action.

Knowing that you can choose to recognize that you are constantly learning things great and small, you can be more mindful of these things and seek more active (rather than passive) learning experiences. When you practice mindful learning and seek to learn more positive things and experience greater potential and possibility – that ultimately empowers you.

When you feel empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that can spread to people around you. This can create a feedback loop of awareness and positivity.

You can build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That can be the impetus to improve numerous aspects of your life for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of the current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of immense positivity. That positivity can generate even more good energies – and that, like you, is always worthwhile.

This is the three-hundred and forty-fourth entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all of my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive a free eBook.

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.Name *FirstLastEmail *WebsiteSubmit

The post What Will You Learn Today? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Want Guaranteed Failure? Don’t Even Try

For a lot of my life, I was so afraid of failing that I didn’t do anything. Hence, I had a guaranteed failure.

I would reach a crossroads and just stand there, indecisive. There, right in front of me, were multiple choices. Yet I could not decide which – if any – to choose.

I’d have an idea for something I desired to do – but indecision paralysis set in. Nothing was done, and I did not leave the crossroads.

The thing that this would teach me over the years was how to develop a guaranteed failure. When you don’t try you’ve automatically failed.

When college wound down, I stood at a pretty vast crossroads. There were several choices before me.

Where do I go? Return to the Midwest, stay out East, go somewhere new and unfamiliar?Do I pursue something in my degree field, theatre?Should I take any job in professional radio I can get, no matter where that lands me?Go back to school for a grad degree and/or teaching certificate?

Initially, I decided not to decide. I stayed in my college town another year, found a couple of jobs along the way and a place to live. But it was soon obvious I had to move on.

I very nearly moved to Chicago because it would be different, and I had family there. But a job interview (for a job I REALLY wanted but didn’t get) told me I much preferred to stay out east.

Thus, I relocated to northern New Jersey – but still without making any choices about employment options.

This got me no real success – and I didn’t try all that hard to figure it out, either.

Why try anything when it might hurt?

That was my unspoken notion in the back of my head for many years. I didn’t try anything where I might risk failure. Hence, I guaranteed my failure instead.

Over the next decade-plus, I bounced from job to job, home to home, relationship to relationship. Every time I came to a crossroads I hesitated. Try this? Should I try that? If I try this instead of that – or that instead of this – what if I choose wrong and fail? Then what?

Rather than make a solid decision I made no real attempt at landing somewhere to my liking – and continued to enjoy my guaranteed failure.

The funny part is, I thought that I was staving off feeling awful for getting it wrong by not making a real choice. This, of course, couldn’t be further from the truth. By choosing not to decide I automatically failed because I never even tried.

Again and again, I questioned my purpose, what I desired to do, who I desired to be, and why did I keep getting it utterly wrong? I was convinced that it would hurt so much to fail at it that I kept making no choice.

Ironically, I lived almost constantly with the pain of failure. The fear of it was so much worse than how it felt that I let that fear dictate my inaction.

Do or do not? Nope, not even gonna try. Can’t get it wrong if I don’t try.

But then there is the much more important other side to this coin. You cannot get it right if you don’t try, either.

Failure can be a success, too

During this period in my life, I got hit by a car crossing a street. The year of physical recovery was followed by another couple of years of mental, emotional, and psychological recovery.

I learned the hard way that life can be short and full of the unexpected. One minute you have all these plans and ideas – and then suddenly you wake up unsure how you got there and broken to boot.

More than one person has asked me – “if you could redo it, would you have avoided getting hit by the car?” Honestly – no. Because that incident changed my entire approach to life.

Though at first, my impatience paid off in how quickly mind mindset helped the doctors, therapists, and other caretakers heal my body, it prolonged my mental health healing. While I didn’t apply it often, I did learn patience through this situation.

After that accident, I began to become more philosophical about my life. You only get one shot to experience all the amazing possibilities of this world in this body. If you choose not to have those experiences you might miss out on some awesome stuff.

Yeah, you might get hurt along the way. Bones and hearts get broken. But the end result of life will be the same no matter who you are or what you do. In the end, you die and leave this body behind.

I realized that when my end comes, I would rather celebrate the chances I took and the experiences I had than to regret what I didn’t go after.

Even failure, I realized, can be success. Because there is always something to be learned from every experience, good, bad, or otherwise.

There are no real guarantees in life

To be perfectly fair, some people will choose not to choose and still win. We all know people who have things handed to them with no effort, succeed with no action, and always come out on top no matter how much the odds were against them.

Even when making no choice and creating thus a guaranteed failure situation, it was still possible to succeed. But that was not by choice – if it happened at all it was by chance.

Life is not just meant to be lived by chance.

You know who you are – I am not picking on you, but I am illustrating my example from your life. Let’s say you have an opportunity to apply for a new job. Yes, the process of taking the time to get your resume set, clean up your cover letter, and do all the steps to apply for the job can be daunting. You may go through all that effort and then fail to get the job.

Or you might go through all that effort and land your dream job.

Want a guaranteed failure? Don’t apply. Let your fear of failure overcome your desire to move on.

The choice belongs to you

No matter where you desire to go or what you want to do – you have a choice. Deciding not to decide for fear of failure is a choice – but know it is a choice for guaranteed failure.

Trust me – fear of failure if far worse than the experience. Take a chance. Even a failure can be a success because you never know what it might teach you.

Nest time you find that you are at a crossroads in your life: Will you act and make a choice – even if you might fail?

This is the four-hundred and fifty-fourth journey into my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along the path of life to consciously create reality. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. I further desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info and click the submit button below and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.Name *FirstLastEmail *PhoneSubmit

The post Want Guaranteed Failure? Don’t Even Try appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

What Control Do You Have?

The control you have is real and powerful – but you alone can choose to take it.

The human mind is so powerful that science and medicine still only barely understand its capacity.

What’s more, your mind is not just the central processing unit (CPU) of your physical body. It is where you reside in the form by which you most identify.

Thoughts and feelings are to your intangible self as water is to the tangible. Water makes up more than 70% of planet Earth, and around 60% of your body – thoughts and feelings make up probably 75% of your intangible self. The rest? Memory, psyche, the subconscious. But that 25% runs really, really deep.

This has been one of the most devastating years for virtually everyone. A global pandemic that the United States, at least, has let run amok – not to mention a widening political and frankly moral divide amid some of the ugliest politics ever. What’s more, this is impacting people on every imaginable level – from news you have no control over to your personal life.

COVID-19 took 3 people from my life thus far. Many of my friends are coping with children not being able to safely return to school – and still working full-time. Teacher friends of mine are trying to determine how to teach without being exposed, too. Chaos is dominant because the upper echelons of leadership are incapable of leading.

I know nobody who hasn’t been impacted by this insane situation. It is frustrating, uncertain, and scary. And it leads to complicated, difficult to answer questions. What can you do? How and when will this end? Ultimately – what control do you have?

Accepting some unpleasant truths

I can’t sugar-coat this, so I am going to make it plain. The world pre-COVID-19 is no more. It is the end of the world as we know it – and few people feel fine.

Change ALWAYS happens – but seldom this drastically, unexpectedly, and irreversibly. That, in turn, is causing other issues to come to light in a way that further complicates peoples’ lives. For example – the protests ongoing in the face of clearly racist policies. Why else is a heavily armed white kid allowed to WALK RIGHT PAST cops while unarmed black people tend to be shot? This is why Black Lives Matter is a hugely important movement.

Because this change has been so powerful – we are seeing some very negative reactions to it. And, since it serves them and their pals, the Trump administration is working on widening all the divides rather than bridging them as real leadership should. The impact then echoes and resonates with our personal lives.

When you go out and see people ignoring mask-wearing orders and social distance; when a friend or family member you thought was reasonable shares one of the ludicrous conspiracy theories; if someone you care about does something racist, sexist, or otherwise ugly – it hits home.

This brings me to the second, far larger, and unpleasant truth: You can’t alter anyone else. You have no power to change how someone thinks, feels, or acts – no matter how much you love them. If they are convinced that their opinion is right – you cannot change it.

This breaks apart families, destroys friendships, and amid a forever-changed life – that is even more devastating.

However – once you recognize these unpleasant truths – and others like them – you gain the ability to move past them.

What control do you have?

When all is said and done – you control YOUR life.

On the surface, for many people, this seems like bullshit. There are bills to pay, obligations to be met, children and family to care for, and other matters that can’t be ignored. Your job won’t work itself – or if you have no job one won’t just find you along the way.

Be that as it may, you still can control your life. But if you have been living subconsciously – allowing patterns and routines to carry you along – this is going to take some effort.

What does that even mean? Let’s face it – the vast majority of people exist. They don’t truly live – at least, not often. They exist.

The collective consciousness of our society is not designed to support the individual. This is ironic because there are all sorts of messages that prop-up the individual over all else. But the truth is that individuality tends to cause derision.

It is a wonder we’re not more schizophrenic as a society. In America, for example, vast swaths of advertising sell sex. Eat this, drink this, wear that – you increase your sex appeal. BUT – then the almost ancient Puritanical values come up and sex is forbidden, taboo, and guilt-causing.

America has NO problem with excessive violence – but nudity? OH MY GOD COVER THOSE BITS! The pearl-clutching publicly is almost surreal. Especially when, behind closed doors, the BDSM toys are employed.

My point is that expressing yourself as an individual is expected to only occur behind those closed doors. Publicly, you need to meet-up with how the collective consciousness expects you to.

Hence, most people just exist – but now and then they go behind the closed door and take control of their life.

But why should truly living life be so limited?

Empower yourself with choices and decisions

Every single day of your life you have the power to make choices and decisions. No two days are ever alike. Similar – but never the same.

You can choose to take control of your life. The decision to live versus to exist is up to you.

Even in the framework of expectations you can work with this.

Why bother? Because I believe that nearly all the conflicts we experience are due to not taking control of thoughts and feelings – and acting unintentionally as such. Literally, thoughtless acts impinge upon our interactions.

Think before you speak or type. Feel how what you are doing, saying, or posting will make people feel. Consider if you are generating positivity or negativity with what you are doing.

That’s all it takes to assume control. Being mindful of your thoughts and feelings – conscious and aware of them here-and-now – puts you in control. That allows you to make choices and decisions that can direct your life – even with all the other craziness going on.

When you are in control you are accountable – and that puts the onus on you in a way that is empowering. It’s ironic how so many find accountability to be disempowering – but it’s not. Placing blame – almost a national pastime – is utterly disempowering.

Which is why you see so much of it. The more those “in power” disempower everyone else – the more they believe they have control. But the truth is that they don’t. Why? Because only you are in your head, thinking thoughts and feeling feelings.

The control you have is real and powerful – but you alone can choose to take it. Practicing mindfulness opens you to conscious reality creation. But more than that – it lets you assume control over whether you live life – or simply exist.

Taking control isn’t hard – but it does require thought, feeling, and action

Knowing that you can choose to be in control over your thoughts and feelings, you can decide to make use of that. When you practice mindfulness to make use of that control, you are also choosing to live rather than just exist – and that ultimately empowers you.

When you feel empowered, your mindfulness increases, you become more aware overall, and that can spread to people around you. This can create a feedback loop of awareness and positivity.

You can build more positive feelings and discover further reasons to feel positivity and gratitude. That can be the impetus to improve numerous aspects of your life for the better, help overcome the overwhelming negativity of the current situation, and generate yet more positivity and gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude is an attitude of immense positivity. That positivity can generate even more good energies – and that, like you, is always worthwhile.

This is the three-hundred and forty-third entry of my Positivity series. It is my hope these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

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New Path – or – An Old Path Anew?

Am I embarking on a new path or just living the definition of insanity?

This quote is attributed to Albert Einstein:

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Whether or not Einstein did in fact say this, the point is valid. How else can you explain trying the same thing again and again – with little to no change – and expecting the result to change?

This is not the notion of seeking the difference between variables in an experiment to get data. This is making a choice that you know has failed before – but expecting it not to fail this time. The results will only change if you have learned from past mistakes and don’t do the same thing again.

This is where I am currently. Both working to do some new things while striving to avoid my past mistakes – hopefully having learned from them – to get different results.

What have I been doing?

In March of 2019 I lost the part-time job I really liked and THOUGHT I was good at. Rather than lament this loss, I chose this time to push to advance my dream of writing full time.

And so, I did. Daily I post to Medium, maintain posts to my websites, while also working on publishing more books in addition to what I already have. In fact, since April 2019 I have published 3 books – with 2 more coming before the end of the year.

Yet still, writing full-time – while awesome and exciting – wasn’t paying the bills. No matter what angles I have taken and even with a growing audience, I have not hit the numbers necessary to earn a decent salary via Medium. Sure, all my books have had some sales, but not even enough to cover what I have invested in editing, marketing, sales attempts, and cover art.

Writing is in my blood. This is my love. I continue to work at improving my craft while looking for new and better marketing avenues.

Because of changes in what I do, I think I have staved off the definition of insanity as above.

But, since bills need to be paid – I went job hunting at the end of 2019. This led to an unexpected opportunity. That turned into a perfect job.

I received great pay. As a freelancer, I set my own hours. Opportunities came up to work and earn more – and I learned to better navigate WordPress, hone my content writing skills, and learned lots about an industry that previously was an ironic notion in my life.

As summer comes to a close, this job is changing – and may be no more. Bummer.

What do I do now?

The work I am doing to – and doing differently in many respects – to earn me money as a writer is going to take some time. Also, I still need to work out better marketing to get more readers to my books.

I keep writing articles because that’s a part of who I am and what I love to do. Still believe I can break that barrier and be a top earner at Medium.

I have, over the past year, become much more consistent in my meditation practice. Though I may miss a day or two here and there – overall I am meditating daily.

I started using a timer to make this more standard.

It began with 10 minutes a day. Then, after a couple of months, 12 minutes. Another month or so, and 15 minutes. Then 18 minutes.

Now, I meditate for 20 minutes a day. And I love what it does for my energy, my psyche, and my overall being.

During meditation, the other day an idea – a really complete idea – popped into my head. It was clear and detailed – and I took it as a message from the Universe not to be ignored.

It is, unfortunately, a slightly new path to take. But at the same time – it’s an old path I tried before.

Hence, the question – am I embarking on a new path or just living the definition of insanity?

My new path – again

First, key facts about who I am. Yes, I recognize that I have some privilege in even having the option to consider this – but maybe that’s all the more reason to.

Corporate America and I don’t mix. My previous attempts at working in a standard office structure, 9-5 cubical farm situation haven’t gone great. I have made the mistake – when the boss asked for input for improvements – of giving that input. My experience, for the record, was that such a request was bullshit and not truly desired.

I’ve done much better in small business settings. Little companies and I – where I get to wear multiple hats – mesh better. Still not perfect, and I get frustrated by idiotic policies and nonsensical structural elements – but it’s more tolerable.

Freelancing – such as I have been doing this year – is PERFECT for me. Enough hours to make a good salary while still pursuing my real love. I managed to make it work once – maybe I can do so again?

What it boils down to is that I am best off as my own boss. Thus, as a full-time writer, I focus on my Brand and that is my business. I get to be the boss.

Years ago, I tried to start my own business. I had this broad, rather vague idea for what to do – but because it was unfocused, I just couldn’t get it together. I built the website, got a business bank account, a phone, and haphazardly (and, frankly, half-assedly) started it up. But it went nowhere fast and I closed it down with even less fanfare than I opened it with.

The new path that I am pondering now is another business. But this time – I have a narrower focus, more direction, and a more easily marketable idea.

Is this new path really where I desire to go?

That’s the big, nagging, elephantine question in the room.

As my current situation winds down and changes, I can’t help but believe that this new idea – and its arrival in my mind so complete during meditation – is worth exploring.

My vision for this venture is not grandiose or with an eye towards legacy. It’s a way to do something I know I have talent at – and make real money doing it.

Recently, I read Derek Sivers’ Anything You Want – 40 Lessons for a New Kind of Entrepreneur. He started a business that he had intended to keep small and intimate – which instead grew organically into a beast.  

Like the venture Mr. Sivers discusses in his book, my business idea is not a legacy-maker. It’s the idea of taking a new path which I already have been on – but of my own making. Make use of a specific skill I have to help others with their ventures – while still having the time and inclination to continue writing.

And of course – this venture includes writing as a part of it.

I am still questioning if this is a good idea – or defining insanity. But I know where I went wrong last time – and if I can find the line between overly-ambitious and unwilling to sell – but apply the necessary ambition and sales skills to generate business – this has potential.

The Universe presented this to me while I was meditating. It was a clear vision, down to the business name. The timing is too perfect to be a coincidence. I am already starting to look down this new path. Tentatively, I am beginning to walk it and see if I am really embarking on a new path – or just living the definition of insanity.

Thanks for coming along with me. So what about you? Are you treading any new paths that may or may not be old paths?

This is the four-hundred and fifty-third journey into my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are ideas for – and my personal experiences with – mindfulness and walking along the path of life to consciously create reality. I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world along the way. I further desire to empower myself and my readers with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-blog and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. My additional writing, both fiction and non-fiction, are available here.

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