M.J. Blehart's Blog, page 26

Sometimes You Truly Need a Change of Perspective

Your point of view – no matter how broad you think it – is restrictive.Photo by Elastic Rat on Unsplash

I pride myself on my ability to regularly see all sides of a given argument.

Even if I vehemently disagree with the other side – I can still see it. My side, their side, and sometimes even the absolute between or apart from both is evident.

However, it’s come to my attention that, even if I can see more than one side to a given argument, my perspective might still be skewed.

This is a very sobering realization. After all this time writing about how perspective is unique to everyone, and no two perceptions of reality are alike – I still found myself called out for my own skewed perspective on something deeply personal.

And that, of course, is why it’s skewed. My personal reality is from only my perspective. And if I hold it too tightly – when inevitable change occurs – I find myself either holding nothing or attempting to hold sand slipping through my fingers.

No two realities are alike

Albert Einstein said,

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

To me, what that means is that how I perceive reality is different from how you perceive it. The illusion of reality is variable due to you and I coming from different places, having different experiences, education, and the like.

There is a collective consciousness that just about everyone accepts to a greater or lesser degree. And even here, the illusion of reality varies.

Mostly, people agree that the sky is blue, grass is green, ice is cold, fire is hot, and so on. But there are variations even here. Colorblind people, for example, might differentiate the colors differently or not at all, and how you feel hot versus too hot might be different from how I feel them.

The point is that Einstein was correct. Reality is a very persistent illusion.

Despite living in the collective consciousness illusion of reality – all of us together – perception of it varies. But no matter how much it varies between you and me, each of us has only one perspective.

Thus, even if I can see both sides of a given argument or both sides of the extremes, I still have only one perspective I perceive them through.

When you fail to recognize your skewed perspective – you might need a change of perspective.

How does a change or perspective come about?

There are lots of ways to gain a change of perspective.

One way is by reading something that opens your eyes. Another is by conversation with someone that might show you their perspective in opposition or variation to yours. This can also just randomly occur via a new experience similar or dissimilar to something you think you know.

However, a change in perspective is a choice. Just because you read or hear something that opens your eyes and your mind to a new perspective – change won’t happen unless you act upon it. Choose to change or no change will occur.

Some people just hope things will happen that will wake them up if they are unaware. But the reality is that this is a choice. You can’t actively, consciously change if you don’t decide and choose to.

Furthermore, you can’t have a change of perspective when you’re not even aware of your own.

Photo by Giorgio Trovato on UnsplashConscious awareness of subconscious concepts

It’s unbelievably easy to think your perspective is the truth. That you know what you know – and so do others. This gets especially insidious over time.

But guess what? The things you know and have always known are subject to change. It’s inevitable.

I fell down this rabbit hole. For years, now, I’ve held a certain belief about someone with absolute surety. I thought I saw another perspective to them, but the truth is that my viewpoint had massively narrowed. Thus, I was seeing from a limited notion from a snapshot in time.

A conversation with a friend opened my eyes and my mind to this. My perspective and perception of the person and certain situations was skewed. The truth was that I lost perspective – and believed the path narrow and singular.

I am now aware of my viewpoint in a way I wasn’t. And I am a little embarrassed that I neglected my own practices and fell victim to closed-mindedness and subconscious notions not in and of the now.

Now that I have active conscious awareness – mindfulness – of my perspective, I can recognize it, acknowledge it, and change it.

The choice to do so is on me. And the decision if it’s worthwhile or not is mine as well.

Change of perspective for growth

I could have resisted the change of perspective I was shown. It was an idea, the viewpoint of another, that I could have rejected. I could have just stuck with what I knew, rejected the new angle, and continued as I did before.

Ah, but that was not serving me. My perspective was creating bitterness, anger, and resentment that isn’t serving me. This mindset of mine is making stress and negativity in my life that do me no good. So why hold onto it?

Sometimes you truly need a change of perspective. For me, this is one of those times. By choosing to change my viewpoint, I’m releasing unnecessary and self-harming negativity. I’m freeing my mind, my heart, and my soul to grow, evolve, and be better than I am now.

Does it seem like I’m overselling this? Perhaps. But when I accepted this new perspective, the change to my own lightened me. It was as if a weight that I had no idea I was carrying was dropped.

My perspective related to my personal illusion of reality was taking away good from my life experience. Since I can see that now, I am free to change my view and release unnecessary negativity.

There will need to be an ongoing, active choice in my change of perspective. It took time to build, so it will also take time to remove and replace. But to grow and be the best me that I can be, this change of perspective is utterly worthwhile.

Have you had an experience where choosing a change of perspective improved your life experience?

This is the six-hundred and second (602) exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – applying mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info then click the sign-up button to the right and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

The post Sometimes You Truly Need a Change of Perspective appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Recognizing Positivity in Impermanence

Change is inevitable, and impermanence is reality.Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

The one and only constant in the Universe is change.

Change can, will, and does occur all the time. No two moments are the same. Alike, maybe, but the same? No. That’s how frequently change occurs.

You might not believe it. But because people tend to resist, combat, and overall won’t accept change and the reality of it – tons of conflict on many levels is the result.

A great deal of this is based on ignoring or denying the reality of change and impermanence.

You might not be familiar with impermanence – but it’s a useful notion to know.

For example – Buddhism embraces impermanence.

Impermanence is defined by dictionary.com as:

Noun
the fact or quality of being temporary or short-lived.

Why is it good to recognize and embrace impermanence? Think of it this way – if the Universe is nearly 14 billion years old, the Earth is 4.5 billion years old, and the average human lifespan is 80 years – human life is distinctly impermanent.

During the span of your life, people, places, things, experiences, and everything else you can imagine will come and go. Good, bad, or otherwise – nothing lasts forever.

Embracing this truth can be empowering and massively positive because it opens you to handling when things go badly.

Everyone has bad days

Nobody at all has good days all the time. It’s simply not possible.

Everyone will lose jobs, have relationships end, lose loved ones, get hurt physically and/or mentally, stub their toe on something, and have other negative, unwanted, undesirable happenings and experiences.

Some of these seem bigger and more impactful than others. And they will be. That’s partially due to attachment and comfort zones.

Attachment is when you are unable and/or unwilling to let go of something. It might be seemingly small – like a favorite mug. Or feel more important – like a loved one. If the mug is broken or the loved one dies, attachment will cause any pain and suffering from the loss to be especially impactful.

Likewise – comfort zones are places of extreme familiarity and the impression of stability that might not truly be comfortable. It could be a home, a job you find to be meh but don’t hate, or an amazing or abusive relationship. It’s familiar, known, and thus a comfort zone because outcomes and experiences with it are predictable and seemingly stable.

Until they’re not.

When a comfort zone or an attachment becomes associated with a connection to people, places, and/or things – troubles and bad experiences with them related to the inevitability of change – increase the bad, the pain, and the negative.

You can’t avoid bad days, negative experiences, or pain. But you can lessen them to one degree or another.

Recognizing impermanence

Everything and everyone you know changes. It’s a constant, a given, a universal fact.

However, the speed of change is hugely variable.

Some change is glacially slow. Personalities tend to fall under this. Someone once kind and generous can slowly and unexpectedly change to selfish and miserly. Chances are, something has changed for them that’s evoked this – and you just missed the signs along the way, so it seemed incredibly slow.

Some change is abrupt and instantaneous. A car accident injuring you, winning big in a casino, an explosion, a crush unexpectedly kissing you. One minute, things are this way, and then KA-POW – now they’re another way. Good, bad, indifferent – change happened and was unmistakable.

Slow or fast, change can, will, and does occur. All the time. Thus, nothing in your life – nothing you know, feel, believe, or value – is unchangeable.

That’s impermanence. And recognizing impermanence opens you to more easily roll with the punches in the face of change and its inevitability.

Why? Because since impermanence recognizes that everything everywhere changes – you empower yourself to be better able to work with and through change.

This is not a cure-all for negativity and bad happenings. No such thing exists. But when you recognize impermanence – you’re more capable of an easier recovery and moving forward when change throws you off.

Photo by Edward Howell on UnsplashWhy is this a positive?

The simple reason is that impermanence means the bad, negative, unpleasant things that happen will pass.

Today might be a bad day. But it WILL change. Tomorrow is new, different, and has the potential to be something better.

Even a string of negative happenings are not permanent. They can and will change. That’s why impermanence is positive. Because though negative experiences are unavoidable – they will pass. Change will alter them.

Recognizing the positivity in impermanence strengthens you. It empowers you to actively reduce attachments and comfort zones and embrace change more. Can’t avoid it, can’t undo it – but you can decide how to resist it, roll with it, or change it again.

That’s why recognizing impermanence is a positive. And that can go a long way towards empowering you to have, do, and be all that you can. And you’re worthy and deserving of that.

Recognizing the positivity in impermanence isn’t hard

It’s all about working with mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, and intentions to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that change is inevitable, and that it can, will, and does occur – you begin to see impermanence in all aspects of life. Knowing that nothing you know is permanent, you can seek and find change, as well as recognize that a bad day or experience today will change and be different tomorrow.

This empowers you – and in turn, your empowerment can empower others around you.

Taking an approach to positivity and negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts life in a way to open more dialogue. With a broader dialogue, you can explore and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

The better aware you’re of yourself in the now, the more you can do to choose and decide how your life experiences will be. When that empowers you, it can spread to those around you to their empowerment.

Don’t you think that’s a worthwhile endeavor to explore and share?

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the four hundred-and-ninety-first entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button to the right and receive a free eBook.

The post Recognizing Positivity in Impermanence appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

It Goes Well Until It Feels Like It Stops Going Well

Everyone experiences this and has choices for what to do with it.Photo by NEOM on Unsplash

Things have, despite a lot of craziness outside of my control, been going well of late. I’ve been in therapy again and getting a lot out of it, feeling good about who I am and where I’m going, and it’s all been feeling like it’s steadily improving.

Today, I hit a wall.

To be fair, there were some extenuating circumstances. Yesterday morning I stepped on the scale for the first time in a while – and disliked what it showed me. We had an awkward, uncomfortable family get-together. My wife had to immediately go away for work. I got home late after driving through some wicked nasty weather – which means I both went to bed and got up late. Fencing practice last night was both great and not great.

Despite getting some very necessary housework done this morning – I find myself feeling stuck, stalled, irritable, and out of sorts.

Hence why I’m saying it goes well until it feels like it stops going well.

Every day is unique in its own, various ways. There are always going to be good and bad days. While today isn’t a bad day, per se – it’s obviously not good, either.

Hence – what can I do about this to shift how it’s going?

Recognition, acceptance, and forgiving

The first step is to recognize that I’m feeling off. What’s more, I must recognize what form feeling off is taking.

Physical, mental, emotional, spiritual? All the above? Some combination of more than one of these? Step one is to recognize this.

After recognition comes the hard part. Acceptance.

It is especially hard to accept feeling this way. Particularly when it’s been going well and feels – all of a sudden – like it’s not.

But resisting how I’m feeling disempowers me. Why? Because if I resist the feelings I’m having – I disassociate myself from them. That doesn’t exactly help me to do anything with these feelings, since disconnecting or disassociating from them doesn’t address them.

Recognition and acceptance do, however. And that’s empowering.

Then comes the biggest challenge of this. Forgiving myself.

When it’s been going well and that stops, I tend to get annoyed with myself about this. What the hell? I thought things were going well. So – how did I muck this up?

I didn’t. It just happens. But one of my known issues is that I tend to get down on myself – and blame myself – when things cease going well.

Recognizing this – I must actively, mindfully work on forgiving myself. I didn’t screw up or do something wrong – it just is. That’s how the universe works – recognize, acknowledge, forgive.

And now – apply mindfulness to move on.

Mindfulness when it’s going well or not-so-well

Applied mindfulness is active conscious awareness.

Conscious awareness is being aware – here and now – of who, what, why, how, and where you are. It’s the employment of your conscious mind, which is your mindset/headspace/psyche self.

This can, however, become passive. Think of it like driving a long distance. You’re aware of the road, the cars around you, the music on the radio, and anyone else in the car with you – but not actively. Not unless you’re singing along to the radio, braking because traffic is slowing down, or conversing with your passengers.

Active conscious awareness comes about through mindfulness. Mindfulness is the act of inquiry to ascertain – in the present, right now – what you’re thinking, what and how you’re feeling, what your intentions are, and what you are or aren’t doing.

That is how you know your conscious thoughts and feelings. This in turn helps you recognize when the ego or subconscious are doing too much of the driving.

The ego and the subconscious

The subconscious is where your beliefs, values, and habits live. It tends to be deeply rooted, and because it’s tied to habit it frequently manifests as rote and routine.

Allowing yourself to live on autopilot – by rote, routine, and habit – can overtake your conscious awareness, leaving you feeling like you haven’t control of your life. When it stops going well, sometimes you don’t realize that’s how you’re feeling – until you’re living more subconsciously.

The ego, as I view it, is a construct created by the conscious mind from its understanding and knowledge of the subconscious mind at some point in the past (recent or distant). Ego, as such, is an artifice that’s sort of a snapshot from a then that’s not now.

Ego is how you project yourself to the world – but also reflect back to yourself. It’s who you think and feel you are, in the now – ish. Because the trouble is –ego is not a product of the now.

Hence why the ego tends to resist and cause you to blame yourself when it feels like it stops going well. Then, the ego hopes, you’ll return to the familiar and comfortable.

This is a reflection of how – when it feels like it’s stopped going well – this tends to connect to mindfulness, conscious reality creation, and Pathwalking to choose your own life’s adventures.

Photo by Lewis Roberts on UnsplashGoing well or going poorly always comes down to choices

Life is a constant, unending stream of choices.

This, FYI, ties directly to the truth that the one and only constant in the Universe is change. That also drives the need and desire for choice.

Some choices are tiny and seemingly mundane. Others, of course, are huge and potentially massively consequential.

Either way – choices are a constant, frequent, regular occurrence. From getting out of bed or hitting snooze; to what, when, and where to eat lunch; to asking someone out or applying for that loan – choices are constant and come in every size, shape, color, and any other variable you can imagine.

Sometimes all the choices can become overwhelming. When that happens, resorting to rote, routine, and habit can be temporarily comforting.

When you spend too much time subconsciously living, however – you become discontented.

That’s part of how I can tell that it goes well until it feels like it stops going well. Making more choices feels like more work than I desire to do. I just want to coast and not have to give it all so much thought.

That, too, is a choice. And while I can take a break and be passive for a time – I must remain mindful of this, lest I become complacent and ultimately find that I lose my path.

Everyone experiences this. Nobody has it perfect, let alone seemingly perfect all the time. Frustration happens, outside forces fuck with us, and things don’t go how we intend.

Then, it feels like it stops going well.

Remembering this, I must be kinder and more compassionate towards myself – and actively mindful to get past this episode and get back on track. Even if that means finding a new track.

Then, finally, there’s this:

It always goes

The sun rises and sets. People are born, grow to be adults, and eventually die. Trees develop buds in the spring, green leaves in the summer, and colorful leaves in the autumn – which fall away to nothing in winter. This is all inevitable. And it’s the truth of the universe that it’s always in action.

Because change can be deeply uncertain, it frightens people. What’s more, in a society built on artificial egoic constructs, change frequently becomes the “other” and the enemy. Rather than recognize and accept that it always goes and keeps going – some want to go back.

That, however, is impossible. You can’t undo, redo, or change what has come and gone. You can only be present here and now – and use that to make choices and decisions for what you do in the present to build the future.

Sometimes, it feels as if it stops going. But the truth is that it’s always going. You might choose to pause – but it’s only ever a pause. You can’t and don’t stop for as long as you live.

Some rue and lament that. But I see it as open, endless, likely limitless potential and possibility.

There are endless new paths available – when I choose to find and/or create them.

That’s where I need to place my focus and attention. Especially when it goes well until it feels like it stops going well. Because it doesn’t stop – it feels that way, but it’s only a pause, and it’s all about my impression of it.

Mindfulness empowers me to choose, here and now, what comes next.

You are similarly empowered by mindfulness.

What do you do when it goes well until it feels like it stops going well?

This is the six-hundred and first (601) exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – using mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info then click the sign-up button to the right and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

The post It Goes Well Until It Feels Like It Stops Going Well appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Why Does Where You Put Your Focus Matter?

If you focus on what you can’t control, you cede your power.Photo by Nicolás Flor on Unsplash

Between world news, politics, celebrity gossip, and everything else that the news media and social media tend to share and spread – it’s easy to get caught up in the bullshit.

And I do mean bullshit. I’m not saying it’s not good to have a general idea of what is happening in the world at large – but when that’s your primary focus, you shouldn’t be surprised when it has all your time and attention.

Then – because this is the case – you find you have less control over your life than you desire, and/or you feel like you’ve little to no control.

The primary issue is this – what you focus the most on is what you give your attention to. That means that if you focus on people, places, and/or things outside of yourself, you lose focus on yourself.

That leads to discontent, uncertainty, and the secession of your power and empowerment to the ethers.

And that means that rather than be mindful of and consciously aware of – and able to control – your life experience, you’ll likely find distress, discontent, and uncertainty.

When you focus on your needs, desires, and life happenings – you empower yourself to be more in control of it all.

Control begins with active conscious awareness

Active conscious awareness is mindfulness. This is the act of being present, here and now, and aware of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions.

When you focus on your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions, you can see if they suit you – or not. And if not – you now have the power to change or alter them.

That’s empowerment. Focus on yourself, and you empower yourself.

However, this probably leads to this question: Isn’t this selfish?

NO. Why not? Because self-care and self-awareness are not selfish.

People around you might indeed see your actions as being self-centered and selfish as such. That’s because when you sacrifice less, set boundaries, and put your health/wellness/wellbeing first, to anyone who feels entitled to be put first in your life, your actions will be seen as selfish.

If you are neglecting your children, pets, and responsibilities that you took on along the way in the name of self-care, that might be selfish. How can you tell? Malice of forethought.

In other words – you fully intend hurt and harm to another. You act in a way that is unkind, uncompassionate, and unempathetic. If it’s something you’d be upset by if someone did it to you intentionally – that’s genuine selfishness.

You cannot control the thoughts and feelings of anyone else.  Remember that kindness, compassion, and empathy cost you nothing.

Focusing on your self-care gives you control of your life experience.

Focus within versus without

There are indeed lots of things in the world at large that can help you grow. Numerous books, movies, webinars, and blogs across the internet can teach you virtually anything at all.

Likewise, if you want to know the latest celebrity gossip, which politicians are manipulating the system for their own gain, and which businesses are screwing over whole communities – that’s all out there, too. And it is clamoring for your attention.

Why? Because someone likely is making money off where you put your attention.

This isn’t a cynical viewpoint I’m expressing. It’s the truth. Lots of your information sources – even good and healthy ones – are aiming to sell you something.

Focus on what’s outside of you – the people, places, and things you have little to no control over – and you lose sight of yourself.

When you focus within, however, you empower yourself. That’s because when you focus within, you get clarity of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions.

Guess what you have 100% control of in this life? Your thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions.

Focusing within empowers you to take control of these and align them to best suit your life.

Photo by Norbert Braun on UnsplashWhy does this matter?

In a culture where the idea of being “woke” has been weaponized to suggest that such awareness is bad should tell you everything about why this matters. Because the people “in power” – knowing that the truth is that it’s utterly bullshit and fake – don’t want “woke” people. “Woke” people are awake, aware, and empowered.

If you put your focus and attention on all the distractions – you’re easily disempowered. That leaves you open to manipulation from without, constant longing that will never be satisfied, and increased disconnect and disempowerment of your self.

When you turn your focus inwards, you gain clarity of your true needs, desires, likes, dislikes, and so on. That clarity informs you if you are content, discontent, satisfied, dissatisfied, and everything in between.

Then, focus within empowers you to change what you need/desire to change. It might be much smaller than you realize – but focusing without doesn’t let you find it easily.

Focus within, on the other hand, and you are more empowered.

This takes regular work, and active conscious awareness via mindfulness. But when you do it – you gain true control of your life experience.

When you are better balanced, more centered, and more self-assured – that can and will inspire the people around you. Then, you can help them turn their focus within – and become empowered.

Empowerment is limitless. Everyone has the right to it, and almost all lack, scarcity, and insufficiency you encounter is artificial and intentionally disempowering.

The good you desire for your life isn’t the same that I desire for mine. Focus within and you see that both of us are worthy and deserving of having it. Neither lacks or loses when the other gains and wins.

That’s why, ultimately, where you focus matters.

Recognizing where you put your focus isn’t hard

It’s all about working with mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, and intentions to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that putting your focus within rather than without gives you more insight and power to control your life experience, you can see why where you put your focus matters. Knowing that putting your focus on what’s without tends to be distracting and disempowering, you can choose where to put your focus to do you the most good.

This empowers you – and in turn, your empowerment can empower others around you.

Taking an approach to positivity and negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts life in a way to open more dialogue. With a broader dialogue, you can explore and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

The better aware you’re of yourself in the now, the more you can do to choose and decide how your life experiences will be. When that empowers you, it can spread to those around you to their empowerment.

Don’t you think that’s a worthwhile endeavor to explore and share?

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the four hundred-and-ninetieth entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button to the right and receive a free eBook.

The post Why Does Where You Put Your Focus Matter? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

I Didn’t Know I Could Do Something for 600 Weeks and Counting

But here we are. Welcome to Pathwalking 600.Photo by Kostiantyn Li on Unsplash

Just before New Year’s Eve at the end of 2011, I decided that rather than make a flabby, easily ignored, or disregarded resolution – instead, I’d take a New Year’s Action.

That action would be to blog at least once a week, every week.

Pathwalking was born. My life philosophy would be placed on Wednesdays, and I would write a new article and post it every week.

That was now just over 11.5 years ago. Today, this article is the 600th culmination of my New Year’s Action taken so long ago.

I didn’t know I’d be capable of doing something for 600 weeks and counting. What’s more – this is not the only article I write during the week, nor has it been for a long time now.

Did my action meet the goal desired? Met and exceeded, yes.

Actions speak loudest

One reason a New Year’s Action seemed much more powerful than a mere resolution was because of the implication of action.

To act is to do something.

It’s easy to conjure up an idea. And resolving to do something falls along this line. When you resolve to act – you’re basically telling the universe you intend to do something.

Intent, however, isn’t action. Intent is a notion, an idea, a concept maybe. But that’s all it is. When you resolve to eat better or go to the gym – that’s not the same as eating better and going to the gym.

I didn’t just resolve to start blogging weekly. I acted on it. The decision was made beyond resolve and straight to action.

What’s the difference? Doing. I think this is where most New Year’s Resolutions fail. Because the intent isn’t the same as outright action.

Actions speak louder than words. I brokered no other option – do or do not, blogging would happen once a week.

By making this an action that I took, I opened the way to increase it further.

At one point, I was writing as many as 6 blogs a week. Now, it’s 4 a week, plus a podcast.

But there was a deeper goal. Making myself act on something. A goal that I desired to see through.

Do something, do something more

For 600 weeks I’ve been exploring this philosophy of life. This has led to a deeper study of conscious reality creation, manifestation, and using active conscious awareness – mindfulness – to direct and, when possible, control my life experience.

Then, I share this to show the potential and possibilities this holds for not just me, but anyone.

There is no One True Way, no singular path for all. But the choices and decisions that go into active Pathwalking have been something I’ve shared for over 11.5 years and counting.

This inspired me to do even more writing. Along the way, I started posting about Positivity every Monday. That’s been ongoing for 489 weeks – a hair over 9.4 years.

The intent of my New Year’s Action over 600 weeks ago had been to do something more with my writing. I had a blog website – but my posts to it were sporadic. It was time to post more frequently.

Pathwalking and Positivity were joined by other posts along the way. To keep my author website fresh, I post a blog about the ongoing creative process there once a week. As I was exploring how to reconcile being both a fiction and nonfiction writer, for a time I was posting a series called Crossing the Bridges.

When I started cross-posting everything to Medium, I eventually found myself writing 5-6 total posts a week. But that wasn’t sustainable, so now there’s just a health and wellness post weekly, bringing my total to 4 posts a week.

When I started out to do something, that led me to do something more.

Photo by Eugene Zhyvchik on UnsplashThe topic evolves

I’ve considered when enough might be enough. Are 600 weeks more than enough articles on this topic?

No. Because the topic is ongoing, broad, and constantly redefined. Recognizing that change is the one and only concept in the entire universe, the methodology of Pathwalking is constantly evolving and changing, too.

I debated if I should repost the first Pathwalk. But it’s rough, unformatted (I knew nothing about SEO and other important readability-increasing necessities), and a bit tentative. However, if you’re curious, it can be found here.

In the 11.5 years I’ve shared this idea, I’ve learned a lot. I’ve strived to apply Pathwalking to my life since I first conceived of this – and largely have. Imperfect though it may be – no practice is perfect, let’s be honest – the effort was and remains well worth it.

Sometimes producing a new post weekly isn’t easy. I worry that I’m repeating myself (and after 600 articles, likely I am to a degree). But writing is like breathing to me, and I love how this continues to intrigue me as it – and I – evolve.

I didn’t know that I could do something for 600 weeks and counting, consistently. But I have. And if I can do this, and it changes and evolves, what else am I capable of?

Do something repeatedly to form a habit

Habits are repetitive actions at their heart.

Nothing becomes habitual without repetition. Good or bad, the actions you do can form habits when you do something again and again.

Writing about Pathwalking is a habit. And a good one, I think. I choose to do something intentionally. Something that meant a lot to me. And it’s grown way beyond anywhere I thought that it might.

Many people form habits unintentionally. That’s where a lot of bad habits come from.

Often, the best way to replace a bad habit is with a new, good habit.

Setting myself the schedule of posts on given days has made them habitual. That’s part of why, even after 600 weeks of this, next week you’ll be reading Pathwalking 601. A habit I intentionally created and used to build more and better, similar writing habits.

Doing isn’t always easy. The best way to begin anything at all is to simply do it.

It’s amazing how easy it is to forget this simple truth. And when you do – you’ll wonder why nothing happened. All the plans were there, the ideas laid out – but did you remember to do, to act, and act repeatedly?

My writing habit – a good habit, I believe – has grown and evolved as much as this singular topic. Maybe I’m deluded, but I believe I’m not bad at this – and writing is the primary means for how I answer my calling to be a storyteller.

However long during this 600-week journey joined me – thanks for being part of me doing something that means a lot to me. I appreciate you for reading this and hope it’s useful and helpful to you, too.

Thank you.

Have you decided to do something that lasted a long time and took on a life of its own?

This is the six-hundredth (600th) exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – using mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info then click the sign-up button to the right and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

The post I Didn’t Know I Could Do Something for 600 Weeks and Counting appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Major Positivity Comes From Recognizing When You Need to Change

But as always, it’s a choice of approach and direction for you to make.Photo by Luca Nicoletti on Unsplash

The other day, I came to a stark realization. I needed to actively change.

This was a matter of looking at all the ways my life has changed since the pandemic – and frankly, all the ways that it hasn’t changed.

As I looked at the elements that are my life as it currently is, I saw with stark clarity how I haven’t chosen to change.

Because this is the level of change where I am wholly in control. This is a shift in how I approach certain things in my life, and whether I actively work on this or passively float along – and then start wondering why I feel like I’m stuck.

The answer is simple, but the questions to reach it are not.

Bluntly – I’ve formed a comfort zone, a place of stability, where and how I like my life to sit. Or rather, where and how I liked my life sitting a couple of years ago.

I knew it shifted, and I appreciate the changes that have occurred. What I failed to notice, however, are the ways that I haven’t changed in the process.

Let me explain what I’m writing about here.

Passive recognition and acceptance

I know for certain that COVID-19 changed the world. At least, it changed a whole lot of elements of my personal perception of the world.

The fantastic gig I had at the start of the pandemic ended because the pandemic ended the company. But I took advantage of the lockdown, and working from home. I wrote, edited, had edited, and published 3 novels in 2020 and 6 novels in 2021. During my 2020/2021 writing experience, I shifted from writing as a pantser to writing as a planner. That helped me produce more work with more focus at a faster pace.

Despite not publishing more work in 2022, I have multiple finished books awaiting edits and covers. MY creative process has changed.

While I actively recognized and worked with the above changes, others occurred in my life that were passive. The lockdown, social distancing, masking, and not having gatherings of groups altered friendships. The pandemic kept us apart physically, but that led to mental and emotional distance as well.

For a whole year, no fencing practice. When we returned, we had to be masked and maintain distance for months. This took a psychological toll that has yet to be fully reconciled.

But on a personal level, I had become so comfortable in my friendships and how they worked – that I missed that they changed. They changed without me.

This is neither good nor bad. It’s just the truth. And it’s taken me quite a long time to recognize and acknowledge it and what it is.

Recognizing when you need to change

Pre-pandemic, I had friends who were like family to me. Many were people I trusted a lot, several were close confidants that I could share anything and everything with.

Through no fault, no mistakes, and no determinable thing – those friendships changed. That’s because we all changed – and those changes made us different enough that the once-close friendships shifted.

This weekend, there was a 50th birthday party for a once close friend of this nature. I was invited, but it didn’t feel right for me to attend – so I didn’t. That friendship, however, changed about a decade or so ago.

The more recent shift, however, only just dawned on me. Like, days ago, only just dawned on me.

Knowing I had a weekend with my wife away, and no event to go to, I pondered – who should I hang out with?

And it occurred to me that apart from my wife, those close friends and confidants are no more.

Change happens. It’s the only constant in the universe. I am in no way blaming anyone or anything for this. And to anyone reading this who I consider a friend – you know I mean no disrespect, but you aren’t a close confidant of that nature.

But the major realization I’ve had is this – I have not let go of that comfort zone. What does that mean? It means I need to change. The illusion of the old friends who are like family, and the close confidants, needs to give way to the true reality that is my life.

Photo by Ethan Sykes on UnsplashThis is not a negative

I know that this might read as negative. But it’s not. I’m not lamenting a loss, blaming anyone or anything, or seeking sympathy. I’m sharing that I’m recognizing that while the reality of my life has changed – I need to change with it.

Ergo, if I would like new friends who are like family and new close confidants – other than my wife – I need to change and make that happen.

Here I am, a 50-year-old adult, recognizing and acknowledging that I could use some new friends.

I don’t need new friends to replace my current friends. This is more specific – I need new friends who are confidants, who will kick my ass and then listen to me whine about it after. But then, with equal empathy, they’ll cheer me on and offer support.

Could I make confidants out of existing friends? Maybe. But this also comes with another element of where and how I need to change.

Specifically – I need more connections who are creatives striving as I am to make a living from creating. Not to put too fine a point on it – but I need to make some new friends, and confidants, who are also writers/storytellers like me.

This is majorly positive

My therapist has been helping me to shift the way I see certain things in my life. What’s more, she helps me find greater clarity when it comes to my desire to live more authentically.

This ties into the reading and studying I’ve done to be more actively consciously aware – i.e., mindful – and take the driver’s seat for my life experiences.

When I came to this realization, that the comfort zone of my friendships has changed – I felt elated. This didn’t create longing, sadness, or any negative emotion. I didn’t feel bad when I realized the nature of the friendships I have aren’t like older, but no longer close friendships. Instead, I felt free.

It was a relief to recognize and acknowledge this. The world changed, and the people I walk it with changed, too. The confusion caused by this false comfort zone has lifted. And that’s tremendous, empowering positivity for me.

I suppose I could have chosen to see this as negative. But I can’t. This recognition takes previously unrecognized and unacknowledged pressure off my psyche – and I’m excited to step forward and embrace and work with my need to change.

This choice tends to be the same for everyone when faced with it. The direction and approach you take – positive or negative – belongs wholly to you, every time.

All that remains now is for me to act upon this understanding.

Recognizing when you need to change isn’t hard

It’s all about working with mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, and intentions to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that things around you have changed – and you haven’t – whatever the reason, you open the way for yourself to make choices and decisions for how to proceed. Knowing that positivity or negativity is a direction and approach you can choose, it’s up to you to employ active conscious awareness – mindfulness – and work with your need to change. Or not.

This empowers you – and in turn, your empowerment can empower others around you.

Taking an approach to positivity and negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts matters in a way to open more dialogue. In that form, you can explore and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

Lastly, the better aware you are of yourself in the now, the more you can do to choose and decide how your life experiences will be. When that empowers you, it can also open those around you to their empowerment.

To me, that’s a worthwhile endeavor to explore and share.

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the four hundred-and-eighty-ninth entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button to the right and receive a free eBook.

The post Major Positivity Comes From Recognizing When You Need to Change appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Combatting What Steven Pressfield Calls Resistance

Resistance is a force that presents itself as multiple obstacles on a given path.Photo by Andrea De Santis on Unsplash

One of the most poignant books I’ve read (listened to) is Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art. In it, the author goes through the pitfalls of the creative process – and the ongoing battle to produce your work. I relisten to this book at least once a year, and I cannot recommend it highly enough.

The main issue is what he calls “Resistance”. Resistance is a force that stands against your work to be your best self. It frequently manifests as procrastination, excuses, indecision, and anything and everything that keeps you from doing your work.

Pressfield talks about this in the face of artistic creativity, entrepreneurship, or any other effort to pursue what Paulo Coelho calls your “personal legend.” It’s that certain something you feel in your bones, in the depths of your soul, that is your calling.

But can you/will you pursue it?

To quote Pressfield directly,

“Resistance will tell you anything to keep you from doing your work. … If you take Resistance at its word, you deserve everything you get. Resistance is always lying and always full of shit.”

Having just finished listening to the book once more, I took away something that should have been obvious to me before – but wasn’t.

Resistance is why I don’t always get my 1500 words of fiction written every day.

More than that, Resistance is where my self-sabotage comes from.

I feel like this is where I’m face-palming and going, “D’oh! Why didn’t I see it before?”

This has altered my perspective in a generative way.

Make ready for combat

I’ve been practicing medieval fencing for over 30 years. Thus, combat – one-on-one and group/melee – is a familiar concept for me.

Personifying my procrastination, self-sabotage, and obstacles as Resistance creates an opponent I can face. It’s no longer the nameless, faceless whatthefuck I’ve been looking at all these years. Resistance is a force to be reckoned with.

Combat with Resistance is not one battle only. It’s a war, as Pressfield says, and requires you to take both a strategic and tactical mindset to combat it in the many forms it will present.

Once more, to quote Pressfield,

“We can never eliminate Resistance. It will never go away. But we can outsmart it, and we can enlist allies that are as powerful as it is.”

Like other struggles with mental health – and this is one, to be sure – it’s a constant, ongoing process. The enemy – Resistance – will present different forces at different times. But if you’re ready for combat – you’re more prepared for the fight to come.

Personifying my battles as Resistance has empowered me. Why? Because instead of a thing with no name that gets in my way – I can identify it. If I can identify it – now I can see it more clearly and fight it appropriately.

By making ready for combat, I’m taking a new stance. It’s a lot harder to be a victim of circumstance when you recognize what’s happening and open yourself to facing it.

Resistance named disempowers it

While it makes me very sad that JK Rowling has proven to be a TERF, her Harry Potter books are amazing on many levels. And from them, I have an example to share.

Dumbledore always names Voldemort. Why? Because naming him disempowers him. “He who should not be named” is a very empowering, fear-evoking statement. But name him, and the implied fear can’t be. Dumbledore even goes one step further to disempower the villain – using his given name over his chosen name.

I’ve been seeking something that’s been in my way, interfering with elements of who, what, where, how, and why I desire to be – for a while. In the process of trying to name it, I found the impression of an unnamed emotion manifested as unworthiness, shame, resentment, and discontent.

I hoped to find maybe a German word to cover this. But I didn’t. Yet, on closer examination, I can name it.

It’s Resistance.

The first step in beating Resistance is to disempower it. That requires taking action against Resistance.

To quote The War of Art,

“Nothing else matters except sitting down every day and trying.”

It’s easy to procrastinate, allow fear of success and failure, and other manifestations of Resistance to keep me from writing my fiction. When it’s an unnamed, unknown enemy I’m facing – it’s been empowered to get in my way.

But calling it Resistance shapes and solidifies it before me. Tricky bugger, hiding in the shadows of my mind. There you are.

Let’s dance, shall we?

Photo by Zachary Kadolph on UnsplashBe who you know you are

Resistance is a product of the ego. The ego, as I envision it, is a construct between your subconscious and conscious self that you project to the world at large – but also reflect back to yourself.

The ego was created during a time when you were consciously aware and tapped into your subconscious self. From that connection, you formed the construct of the self you perceive based on the values and beliefs that you held whenever that connection was bridged.

Often, the ego gets formed around beliefs and values that change and cease to be who, what, where, how, and why you are, now. During mindfulness practices – and active conscious awareness – you can see this for what it is.

Thus, you can see if you are being who you truly are.

Again, from The War of Art,

“Our job in this life is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it.”

Resistance, based on your egoic construct, likes you just the way you are. But if you’re not being who you are, then that’s what you’re facing to change.

To be who you are requires fighting Resistance. You’ve done it before – even if you didn’t call it this. As such – you can do it again.

Punch Resistance in the face

One of the most recognizable elements of Resistance is fear.

Again, from The War of Art,

“Resistance is experienced as fear; the degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance.”

The most important thing to remember here, however, is that fear never truly goes away. You can keep it at bay, you can lessen it, you can even send it away for a time. But it will always be there.

Why? Because fear is hard-wired into humanity. However, what once protected you and me from danger like predators in the wild has evolved – but not in a way that helps us. Instead, fear has evolved from mostly tangibles to intangibles.

Rather than protecting you by causing you to escape certain death from a beast intent on preying on you, fear tends to protect you from potential suffering – that might not ever occur.

Because it’s hardwired into the human genome, we will always have fear. And it’s not always obvious the cause or precise why of the fear you experience. But when you personify it as Resistance – you can more easily prepare for combat and take it on.

One last quote from The War of Art,

“Fear doesn’t go away. The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day.”

When you see fear, procrastination, and other intangibles as Resistance – you see your opponent clearly. Now, you become empowered to combat this opponent – and take your life in all directions you desire it to go.

Remember – you’re worthy and deserving of being who you know you can/should be/are. Resistance might win the occasional fight – but the war can be won by you.

Do you recognize Resistance and how combatting it empowers you?

PS – Thank you, Steven Pressfield, for your amazing work.

This is the five hundred and ninety-ninth exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – using mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.

Please take a moment to subscribe to my mailing list. Fill in the info then click the sign-up button to the right and receive your free eBook. Thank you!

The post Combatting What Steven Pressfield Calls Resistance appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Find The Good In Yourself First

You are a good, worthy, and deserving person.Photo by Tran Mau Tri Tam ✪ on Unsplash

The world appears – on many levels – to be going truly mad.

Every week, writing about positivity, I always manage to find something to write about. But that doesn’t mean it’s not especially challenging. Looking at the outside picture of the world at present is deeply frustrating, distressing, and too close a look can be depressing.

Despite my attempts to spend less time on social media – a serious harbinger of negativity – I still get swept up by it. Before I know it, an innocent glance at FB to see what my friends are doing winds up as a trip down a rabbit hole of unfortunate happenings, bad players, and lots of other negatives.

It’s so easy to get overwhelmed. And it begs the question – how do you find the good in a world presented as terrible and negative as ours all too often seems to be?

After a little soul-searching, I have an answer:

Find the good in yourself, first.

From the depths to the surface

Let’s clear something up right off the bat. You are, at your core, a good person.

The only way that this is untrue is if you willfully, knowingly do things to hurt or harm others. If you have Intent, malice of forethought, and full realization that what you’re doing is hurtful or harmful to others in unkind, uncompassionate, unempathetic ways.

We all make mistakes that will hurt people. Setting boundaries, changing relationships, jealousies, and other human nature factors that impact the thoughts and feelings of others will occur throughout your life. Remember – you have NO control at all over how anyone else thinks, feels, intends, or acts.

That cleared, you are a good person. Like everyone else, you desire to live a life that’s interesting, worthwhile, content, joyful, and comfortable. Welcome to the human race.

Many people get thoroughly caught up in the minutiae of everyday life, rote, routine, and habit. It’s easy to lose sight of being a good person because you question your humanity overall.

How do you know you’re a good person, at your core? Because you don’t actively desire to cause hurt or harm to others. You are striving to do good things overall and do no harm.

Am I naïve for believing that most people are good? No. When I look at all the people that I know personally any every level – friends, family, acquaintances, coworkers, everyone I encounter virtually or physically one-on-one – every one of them, at their core, is a good person.

Sure, lots of them have flaws. There are a few that I think are semi-intentionally selfish on occasion. But all of them are, deep down, good people.

Imperfect. Occasional fuck-ups. Sometimes foolish. But when all is said and done – good people.

I suspect your experience is much the same.

People don’t put the good on display often enough

Have you ever noticed how the loudest voice in a given room tends to be the one with the most questionable intent?

You know who has ill intent and is a bad person because they announce it. They make it damned clear they care only about themselves, their power, their agenda, and so on.

It’s often disguised as being for the good of the masses – but the moment their actions hurt or harm others, create artificial lack and scarcity to disempower, and start labeling “us” versus “them” in one form or another – they self-identify.

Unfortunately, they sucker people who are otherwise good, in. Promises of fixing often non-existent or overblown problems get them followers and supporters. That might include people you know – family or friends taken in by the bullshit – and that hurts. Because they largely don’t see it for what it is.

Good people, by and large, just are. It’s not on display, and you’re not selling something. You’re largely just looking to live decently. You probably don’t want to see anyone else get hurt or harmed, too.

Because good is not as frequently, obviously, or loudly displayed – it’s harder to see and find. Social media algorithms and news and information outlets prefer negativity, titillation, and controversy over sharing good. That’s what sells – and they’re all about making a profit.

Thus, the best place to find the good is in yourself, first and foremost.

Photo by John Fornander on UnsplashThings to look at and for

Where do you find the good in yourself?

Start with how you treat other people. Do you hold doors for strangers? Will you help a friend in need by listening to them and their problems? Do you call family to say hi? Are you concerned about the wellbeing of marginalized people unlike yourself? Do you act with compassion, kindness, and empathy towards others?

What about how you treat objects, things, and animals? Do you pet consenting dogs and cats? Throw out trash in bins rather than wherever? Signal turns? Do you respect privacy? Are you acting to keep your things in good repair? Do you appreciate nature and things like sunlight, moonlight, birdsong, and the like?

Probing deeper, even if you know an awful person that you’d not feel bad about watching get torn apart limb from limb by angry squirrels – do you intend hurt or harm to anyone? I’m going to hazard a guess that in truth, you want them to see the better and change – not hurt them. Apart from in the abstract, you genuinely don’t desire hurt, harm, or bad for anyone.

The good in yourself is abundant. And that’s a reflection of the truth that you and I live in an abundant Universe. There is more than enough good to go around. Everyone deserves care, kindness, compassion, empathy, and love. Your true desire is along that line.

You are a good, worthy, and deserving person. When you recognize and acknowledge this – and find the good in yourself – you become empowered to do more good for the good of the whole world.

And at the very least – you open yourself to more potential and possibilities to improve your life experience. More than enough good to go around.

Finding the good in yourself isn’t hard

It’s all about working with mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, and intentions to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that you have good intentions, and don’t actively, or knowingly seek to hurt or harm others, you can seek and find the good in yourself in its many forms. Knowing that the good in you is abundant and has many sources, you can seek and find it, bring it from your depths to the surface, and employ it to get through the muck of the outside world and put yourself in a better place mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically.

This empowers you – and in turn, your empowerment can empower others around you.

Taking an approach to positivity and negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts matters in a way to open more dialogue. In that form, you can explore and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

Lastly, the better aware you are of yourself in the now, the more you can do to choose and decide how your life experiences will be. When that empowers you, it can also open those around you to their empowerment.

To me, that’s a worthwhile endeavor to explore and share.

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the four hundred-and-eighty-eighth entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

Please take a moment to sign up for my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button to the right and receive a free eBook.

The post Find The Good In Yourself First appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Please Stop Being Complacent With Your Life

Complacency leads to losing awareness and control.Photo by Olli Kilpi on Unsplash

Despite numerous messages to the contrary, you control your life.

What does complacent mean? In this context, it’s losing touch with/awareness of yourself, due to a sense of comfort and satisfaction that everything is as it should be.

And maybe it is. For a while. But inevitably, it won’t be. Comfort zones cease being comfortable and familiar. That sense of satisfaction stops feeling satisfying because of tangibles, intangibles, or both.

Why? Because of the only constant in the Universe. Change.

Change is inevitable. It can, will, and does occur. Some you can control and direct. But a lot of it you have no control over at all.

Certain groups and individuals love to weaponize that lack of control for their selfish desires. They do so by placing blame on one group or another for why your life sucks and suggesting that suppressing that group – while supporting their goals – is best for you and your life.

Outside influences can impact your inner world. They can cause you to be complacent with your life – because they convince you It’s not yours to control. They suggest instead that if you let them have control, they’ll take care of you.

When you’re 11, and unable to live without the boundaries and guidance of your parents/guardians, that’s one thing. Once you’re an adult – you are empowered and capable of choosing what’s best for you and your life.

The choice of not being complacent, however, feels like it comes with strings attached to it.

The utterly arbitrary “norms” of society and culture

About 40 years ago, you were rather massively limited in how wide an audience you could reach in one shot.

Even through mediums like TV and radio, you had a range that was generally regional, and maybe national at best. Even then, it was only during very specific windows of time – like advertisements or newscasts.

Then the internet came into being. Now you have a resource for instantaneous reach globally to any given audience.

This has led to the creation of a whole new class of demagogues, talking heads, and opinionated “experts” with a platform to tell you how it is. And because fact-checking – and often science – have been increasingly disregarded or discredited, a new “normal” is created.

What’s more, these people “in power” try to sell you and me on the value of remaining complacent. This is how it’s always been, and you should accept it for what it is. Look closer, though, and the lie in that idea is obvious and blatant.

This is not a digression. I’m bringing this up because when you and I become complacent with the outside picture of the world we’re presented – that leads to complacency in our lives and choices we do and don’t make.

What that means is that you and I allow our control to be relaxed in the name of complacency. And maybe sometimes that’s okay. But inevitably, it won’t be.

What does being complacent with your life mean?

I know a lot of people who spend a lot of time unhappy.

They’re in unsatisfying relationships, uncomfortable jobs, unideal living situations, and/or finding it hard to feel truly satisfied with their life.

Yet they’re complacent because they believe that they have all that’s available, or all that they deserve, or that they should accept what they have and not ask for more.

The arbitrary “norms” of society and culture can be demanding. And if you accept them as the truth – then you open the door to complacency in your life.

This can also occur when you don’t live by the “norms” of culture and society. Accepting that you will earn less doing your work and always be on the outside looking in – for example – is a form of complacency in your life, too.

So, what does being complacent with your life mean? It means you’ve allowed yourself to live by rote, routine, and or habit. Ergo, you’re not working to be actively consciously aware – and thus, mindful.

When this happens, it’s easy to allow yourself to be satisfied with “good enough”, “how it should be”, and the like. Your complacency with your life means you accept all limits and limitations, that you deserve less than him or her, and other factors that keep you disempowered.

That’s what complacency in your life is all about. Not taking the empowerment that’s yours – no matter who you are. It’s accepting that you’re unworthy or undeserving of it.

Photo by Jordan Seott on UnsplashTake “woke” as an ultimate example of disempowerment

All offense to those who think otherwise – but how can you possibly see the idea of being “woke” – conscious, aware, and awake – as bad?

Seriously – if the opposite is being complacent, complicit, and a sheeple – which it is – then woke is naught but good.

Do you know why they try to paint “woke” as a negative? Because being “woke” means being empowered. And when you’re empowered, you don’t want to be asleep. That leads to these demagogues losing the control they think they have – or that they want to have.

You’re also told that we live in a world of lack, scarcity, and insufficiency. The “woke” crowd will take away what’s yours.

Explain how inclusivity takes anything from anyone? You can’t because it doesn’t. Every way that you’re told “woke” people are out to take away the limited resources is a lie. Largely because the lack, scarcity, and insufficiency you’re presented are untrue.

When you’re complacent in your life, you will be more inclined to buy into lies and deception of this nature. But this is the big picture. Let’s zoom back into you and your life.

Your life and being complacent in it

Nobody is here to merely exist. Humans are not like the rest of the animal kingdom.

You – and every other human on the planet – are capable of abstract, creative, and unique thoughts. You are a complex being of multiple thoughts, emotions, and intentions. And you’re capable of constant learning and evolving.

To be fair, you need to do things to make money to have all the basic necessities in life. You won’t be handed a home, food, clothing, or anything else – work is necessary to have and acquire them.

But if the way you live now is a constant struggle, a source of discontent, and otherwise lacking – you’ve likely allowed yourself to be complacent in your life.

When you live largely by rote, routine, and/or habit, this will occur. You’re more likely to buy into messages of lack, scarcity, insufficiency, the way “it’s supposed to be”, and the like.

Mindfulness – active, conscious awareness – is the way to move past this. By asking yourself, here and now, what you’re thinking, what and how you’re feeling, what you intend, and the why of your actions – you become actively, consciously aware.

That will tell you if you are living life – or letting life live you.

You are worthy and deserving of experiencing a life that brings you more joy than not, makes you desire to explore potential and possibilities, and more. That gives you control over what you can control – your inner mindset/headspace/psyche self. And from there, you can move past complacency and try, do, have, and be more.

Not for anyone else. Not for the approval of others. For you, and your good. You are ultimately worthy and deserving.

Do you find yourself being complacent in your life – and discontent as such?

This is the five hundred and ninety-eighth exploration of my Pathwalking philosophy. These weekly essays are my ideas for – and experiences with – using mindfulness and positivity to walk along a chosen path of life to consciously create reality.

I share this journey as part of my desire to make a difference in this world and empower as many people as I can with conscious reality creation.

Thank you for joining me. Feel free to re-post and share this.

The first year of Pathwalking, including expanded ideas, is available here. Check out Amazon for my published fiction and nonfiction works.

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The post Please Stop Being Complacent With Your Life appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.

Give Up, Push Through, Or Find Another Way?

No matter the obstacles, you always have a choice.Photo by William Krause on Unsplash

Life is seldom simple. Very rarely do you get to go from point ‘A’ to point ‘B’ smoothly and obstacle free. And every time you come across challenges and obstacles in your life, you can give up, push through, or try another way.

That doesn’t always feel true. There are plenty of times when it feels like you’re stuck, trapped, and without recourse.

The trouble is, you always have choices – but they’re not always welcome, good, or desirable choices. When choosing between the lesser of two evils, a bad or worse situation, or degrees of loss – it feels like there’s no true choice being made.

Why is that? I think sometimes it comes from messages that choices should always have grandiose impact and effect.

But no matter what the situation is, when you choose, you decide on change.

Yet even when what you’re choosing between is poor and less-than-desirable, you’re still empowered when you choose.

That’s because not choosing always disempowers you.

What is empowerment?

It’s too easy to take the meaning of being empowered as being given power by another.

Power given to you by anyone who is not you is artificial. Sure, there’s a degree of power to being a parent, a guardian, a boss, a teacher, and the like. But that’s not about power as much as it is about authority. And they aren’t the same.

Authority is chain-of-command, accountability in groups, and mentors sharing wisdom with associates, students, and the like. It’s not true power – though many will claim power as authorities.

True power, however, belongs to individuals. You ultimately choose your life experiences. Similarly, when you come across obstacles, you decide if you give up, push through, or find another way to deal with them.

Making those choices is taking the power that is yours into yourself. And that is what empowerment is.

Empowerment is claiming your power to live your life on your terms. It’s never a one-time matter. You are constantly given situations where you decide to be empowered or allow artificial powers and/or authorities to disempower you.

Anytime you choose – big or small, amazing or less-than-desirable – you empower yourself.

Leaving it to random chance disempowers you

You can’t count on getting lucky when you allow random happenstance to decide your fate.

Yes, you might get lucky and by not choosing, still manage an amazing outcome. But while it could feel like a win – it can also ring hollow because you lucked into it.

When you are not choosing for yourself – you’re not empowering yourself. On any level whatsoever where you do or don’t choose.

By not choosing, you cede your power to random chance, circumstance, or perhaps fate. But when you decide not to decide or choose not to choose – you are disempowered.

Choice is like any other muscle in your body. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. Hence, the more you actively choose – the more choices you find you can make.

That’s why, no matter the obstacles, you always have a choice.

Photo by Elena Mozhvilo on UnsplashGive up, push through, find another way?

I believe that every choice presents these options. No matter what the choice might be – these three options always exist.

Giving up is a choice. It’s not the same as deciding not to decide. It’s a conscious, active choice not to offer resistance, put up a fight, or push against an obstacle.

There is no right or wrong here. Despite the notion of “Never give up, never surrender” – sometimes it’s best to give up. But you alone will know when and why that’s the case – nobody but you is in your head, heart, or soul, to make this decision.

Pushing through can be fraught with challenges. Sometimes it feels too hard, too frustrating, and too difficult. There are times when pushing feels like the only choice – because you are not willing to give up and you have a goal that the given obstacle won’t get in the way of.

Pushing through is a choice, which may or may not get you where it is you desire to go. But choosing is what matters here for your empowerment.

Finding another way is the other option. What that is and might be you won’t know until you face the obstacle you’ve reached.

Maybe you can go over it/under it/around it rather than through it. Perhaps the given obstacle is a message to change what you are doing. Possibly, some way you didn’t expect may open up for you to choose.

The truth is – there’s always a choice to be made. And if the immediate options of give up and push through feel wrong – then you can choose to find another way.

Right, wrong, and other constructs

When it comes to choices, it often feels like there’s a right choice and a wrong choice. Good versus evil. Strong versus weak. And the like.

When you place these in universal moral fabrics – it’s easy to lose sight of what matters most when it comes to choices. But the constructs of the given extremes aren’t so important when all is said and done.

What’s important is what the choices mean to and for you, to and for your empowerment.

That doesn’t give you carte blanche to be an asshole, intentionally cause others to be hurt or harmed, or any other selfish, self-righteous position. What it does is empower you to look at the given choice and see how it works for you.

That does not mean you can or should ignore the impact on others your choice might have. Take elections, for example. When you knowingly vote for someone intent on hurting others for their agenda or false power – you must take that into consideration. And given that you sure as hell wouldn’t want to be harmed in the way that person is causing harm – I hope you’ll choose mindfully and wisely. But I digress.

When you choose for yourself – and someone not you feels hurt because of it – that’s not the same as the above. That’s because your choice was made without intent to cause hurt. You can’t control how anyone else feels. And sometimes what you need to do, and the choices you need to make and the empowerment that comes of them, are too important to avoid for the sake of someone else.

Choice, even in the face of obstacles, empowers you. When you’re empowered, you can help empower others. When more people are empowered – things improve for everyone.

Giving up, pushing through, and finding another way with choice isn’t hard

It’s all about working with mindfulness of your thoughts, feelings, and intentions to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that you always have choices – even when they, frankly, suck – you can decide how your life will play out. Knowing that any choice is better than no choice at all, you can use active conscious awareness – mindfulness – to decide what choices to make, and thus strengthen your ability to choose (just like building strength in any other muscle).

This empowers you – and in turn, your empowerment can empower others around you.

Taking an approach to positivity and negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts matters in a way to open more dialogue. In that form, you can explore and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

Lastly, the better aware you are of yourself in the now, the more you can do to choose and decide how your life experiences will be. When that empowers you, it can also open those around you to their empowerment.

To me, that’s a worthwhile endeavor to explore and share.

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the four hundred-and-eighty-seventh entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, re-blog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published works – both fiction and non-fiction.

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The post Give Up, Push Through, Or Find Another Way? appeared first on The Ramblings of the Titanium Don.