Will Bowen's Blog, page 93
July 17, 2014
What are you looking for?
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As you seek so shall you find. So often we are looking for negative things and not realizing that we are actually drawing them into our lives.
We get to make choices as to what we want to experience and we will experience what we look for. What are you looking for?
July 16, 2014
Eliminate Your Word
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Are you doing things because you “should”?
Are you not doing something because you “can’t”?
Words define our lives. Change the words you use and improve your life.
I’m on Day 2 today, headed to Portland, Oregon to speak to the Oregon Healthcare Financial Management Association, about Complaint Free Organizations.
What day are you on? I can see August 7 just over the horizon.
July 15, 2014
The Missing Link Between Forgiveness and Success
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Jealousy holds people back. It keeps them from fully achieving because they are resentful of other people. In resenting other people’s success they repel their own.
A simple process of forgiveness releases jealousy and opens the doors to abundant living.
Back to Day 1!
I’m back on Day 1 for the 20th time…. Let me say that again, “I’M BACK ON DAY 1 FOR THE 20TH TIME!”
The real challenge behind the Complaint Free challenge–going 21 consecutive days without complaining, is that it’s H-A-R-D. It’s tough to first, realize how much you complain, second, observe yourself helplessly as you continue despite your intention to stop and then, finally, stop complaining. Remember, I have successfully completed this challenge already. And now, 8 years later it has still taking me nearly 5 months–and I’m not there yet.
So, if you’re struggling— struggle. But, stay with it. The only people who don’t succeed are the ones who give up.
I still believe I’ll complete this by August 7, 2014.
How about you?
If you’ve given up in the past, give it another shot!
July 14, 2014
Day 2!
I am now on Day 2 going 21 days in a row without complaining. How about you?
Today marks one month since I had my shoulder surgery. According to my doc and physical therapist, I’m coming along very well. However, I still don’t sleep very long–30 minutes to a few hours at a time, before pain JOLTS me awake.
Again, this is “normal.” But it means that I haven’t had anything close to a full night’s sleep in a month. I feel sort of fuzzy all the time.
It amazes me to hear how many people live this way–not getting enough sleep. Regardless of your schedule, getting 8 hours is vital. No hobby, post, tweet, program or activity is more important.
When we don’t get enough sleep, it’s much easier to complain. And most people are sleep-deprived.
June 18, 2014
Day 8 – Speaking to Toastmasters!
OK, not my best picture but I’m standing in front of City Hall, Kansas City, MO. I spoke there today at a local Toastmasters group. For the first time in my 20 years of professional speaking, someone asked me to speak on this art form I so dearly love.
Here are the highlights from my speech:
“WHAT’S THE #1 FEAR SHARED BY ALL HUMAN BEINGS? Most people say, ‘Public Speaking—people fear it more than dying!’ But, that’s not true—I speak to thousands of people each year and I’M WAY MORE AFRAID OF DYING. In fact, I LOVE speaking.”
“No, the #1 FEAR PEOPLE HAVE IS BEING EMBARASSED. A speaker who has mastered the basics is confident, at ease, even eager. Master these 5 Basics of Public Speaking as remembered by the acronym S.P.E.A.K.
*S* STAND LIKE OWN THE SPACE—IF you don’t feel like you belong in front of the crowd then no one else will, either.
EXTERNALLY: Practice with one or two people and then more until you feel like you are deserving of the attention you are receiving.
INTERNALLY: Most speakers ask themselves the wrong question. The whole time they are speaking they are thinking, “How am I doing.” THIS IS THE WRONG
QUESTION. They should be looking into everyone’s eyes and thinking, “Are you with me.”
*P* PACING IS…(wait for it)…EVERYTHING—Force yourself to pause during your speech and take a breath from time to time. Most speakers ramble on afraid that they will lose their audience if they pause. This makes them MORE LIKELY to lose people.
Taking a two to five second pause from time to time let’s some people CATCH UP and other people WAKE UP. Those people who are hanging on your every word will appreciate the respite to marinate in your wisdom. Those who have drifted off into their own thoughts will wonder, ‘Why’s it so quiet all of a sudden?’ and they’ll return their focus to you.
*E* ENHANCE YOUR ATTENTION AND WARMTH—Ask yourself, what’s the most desirable characteristic for a public speaker? Answer: Charisma.
In “The Charisma Myth” Olivia Fox Cubane gives us the formula.
CHARISMA = POWER + ATTENTION + WARMTH
If you are standing in front of people as the speaker, you already have power! Now, look people in the eye (attention) and, when appropriate, give a genuine smile (warmth). This will automatically make you charismatic.
*A* ARMS—“What do I do with my hands when I’m speaking?” is a question that throws many newbie speakers into a tailspin.
Here’s a simple and practical suggestion. Go to your local CVS, Walgreens or other store and buy 2 inexpensive slings like one would wear after shoulder surgery. Put both your arms in slings and practice your speech moving your hands as you do. This will give you a nice, comfortable and appropriate range of motion until the you become more confident.
*K* KINDNESS—People won’t always remember what you say, but they will remember how you made them feel. Whether it be a speech to ten thousand people or a passing one-to-one chat, do your best to make sure that what you say is the high point of their day. And you do this by being kind.
So, that’s my tips for speakers. If you know anyone who is developing their speaking skills, feel free to share this.
Day 7
I’m on Day 7 going 21-consecutive without complaining.
My goal date for completing the challenge is August 7, 2014. What day are you on?
Steven Hawking notes that the UNIVERSE CONTINUES TO EXPAND because space, itself, is a vast storehouse of “negative energy.” Space is not empty, it is a huge storage battery for negative energy and so, rather than just being an empty hole into which the universe expands, THE NEGATIVE ENERGY OF SPACE ACTUALLY PULLS THE UNIVERSE TO EXPAND.
Everyday, we are surrounded by negative energy in the form of people and situations. If we fight or resent them, we don’t grow. However, if we accept what is happening, realize that this negative energy is PULLING US TO EXPAND, we open ourselves to growth, change and happiness.
Be grateful for negative energy—it’s what causes you to expand.
June 13, 2014
There is no shame in Day 1!
There is no shame in day 1!I don’t know about you but everything that is important to me has taken time. It took me over a year to fly solo in a plane, it took me 18 months to get in shape after I decided to do so, whenever I write a book it can take a year or more.Why, then, do we have the mistaken belief that we should be able to change ourselves overnight? Eddie Cantor said, “It takes 20 years to make an overnight success.” The only people who fail at the 21-day Complaint Free challenge are the ones who give up.
Last night I caught myself speaking sarcastically. So, I’m back on day 1– which is a great place to be. If you’re doing the Complaint Free challenge, don’t give up before the miracle happens.
— feeling Complaint Free.
June 11, 2014
I made it to day 17!
Hooray! I’ve made it to Day 17—a new personal best! My goal is to go 21 consecutive days without complaining by August 7, 2014.
I woke up this morning with a quote in my mind from “The Lazyman’s Guide to Enlightenment” by Thaddeus Golas, “One of the necessary laws for our relations as equal beings is this: What you say, goes—but only for you and those who agree with you.”
Unfortunately, most of us think EVERYONE must agree with us! There is a bit of insecurity–driven Control Freak in everyone but when we began to realize how very little control we have actually over other people, we begin to relax and focus our efforts on the ONLY person we can control – – US!
The less try we try to control others, the less we have to complain about.
June 10, 2014
Day 16!
Wow, I am on Day 16 going 21 consecutive days without complaining. This is my third time on Day16. Thus far, it’s the highest number of consecutive days I have accomplished.
Whenever we reach a milestone in our lives it’s good to celebrate—it is also important to be cautious.
In his fantastic book “The Big Leap,” Gay Hendricks talks about what he calls “upper-limiting.” People seem to experience and enjoy life to the level of happiness that they allow themselves. When things go really well, there is actually a temptation for us to screw things up so that we then settle back to where we feel we belong.
Knowing this, I intend to be hyper vigilant.
Have you ever caught yourself upper-limiting? Possibly doing very well on a diet, exercise, or not complaining program and then blowing it?
