Michelle Hauck's Blog, page 124
November 19, 2013
REVIEWERS NEEDED FOR KINDAR'S CURE
I'm not big on asking for help for myself. It's so much easier to help others. But ... it's time to pull up my big girl pants and get serious.
I'm looking for some reviews of my YA fantasy story, Kindar's Cure. It's got murder, mayhem, magic and a motivated but ill princess. If you've already read it, please consider leaving a review.
If you'd like one of the free ebook copies in exchange for an honest review, leave a comment with a way to get in touch with you. Also tell me what type of file you'd like epub or mobi. There are a limited number, but I'll try to get one to everybody.
If you haven't got an ereader but are on Goodreads, check out the sidebar for the giveaway of the paperback version that's happening through November 30th.
Kindar's Cure is published by Divertir Publishing.
Princess Kindar of Anost dreams of playing the hero and succeeding to her mother’s throne. But dreams are for fools. Reality involves two healthy sisters and a wasting disease of suffocating cough that’s killing her by inches. When her elder sister is murdered, the blame falls on Kindar, putting her head on the chopping block.
No one who survives eighteen years of choke lung lacks determination. A novice wizard, Maladonis Bin, approaches with a vision—a cure in a barren land of volcanic fumes. As choices go, a charming bootlicker that trips over his own feet isn’t the best option, but beggars can’t be choosers. Kindar escapes with Mal and several longtime attendants only to have her eyes opened that her country faces dark times.
Her mother’s decision to close the prosperous mines spurs poverty and joblessness, inciting rebellion and opening Anost to foreign invasion. As Mal urges her toward a cure that will prove his visions, suddenly, an ally turns traitor, delivering Kindar to a rebel army, who have their own plans for a sickly princess.
With the killer poised to strike again, the rebels bearing down, and the country falling apart, she must weigh her personal hunt for a cure against saving her people.
I'm looking for some reviews of my YA fantasy story, Kindar's Cure. It's got murder, mayhem, magic and a motivated but ill princess. If you've already read it, please consider leaving a review.
If you'd like one of the free ebook copies in exchange for an honest review, leave a comment with a way to get in touch with you. Also tell me what type of file you'd like epub or mobi. There are a limited number, but I'll try to get one to everybody.
If you haven't got an ereader but are on Goodreads, check out the sidebar for the giveaway of the paperback version that's happening through November 30th.
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Kindar's Cure is published by Divertir Publishing.
Princess Kindar of Anost dreams of playing the hero and succeeding to her mother’s throne. But dreams are for fools. Reality involves two healthy sisters and a wasting disease of suffocating cough that’s killing her by inches. When her elder sister is murdered, the blame falls on Kindar, putting her head on the chopping block.
No one who survives eighteen years of choke lung lacks determination. A novice wizard, Maladonis Bin, approaches with a vision—a cure in a barren land of volcanic fumes. As choices go, a charming bootlicker that trips over his own feet isn’t the best option, but beggars can’t be choosers. Kindar escapes with Mal and several longtime attendants only to have her eyes opened that her country faces dark times.
Her mother’s decision to close the prosperous mines spurs poverty and joblessness, inciting rebellion and opening Anost to foreign invasion. As Mal urges her toward a cure that will prove his visions, suddenly, an ally turns traitor, delivering Kindar to a rebel army, who have their own plans for a sickly princess.
With the killer poised to strike again, the rebels bearing down, and the country falling apart, she must weigh her personal hunt for a cure against saving her people.
Query Questions with Bree Ogden
Writers have copious amounts of imagination. It's what makes their stories so fantastic. But there's a darker side to so much out of the box thinking. When a writer is in the query trenches, their worries go into overdrive. They start pulling out their hair and imagine every possible disaster.
Here to relieve some of that endless worrying is a new series of posts called Query Questions. I'll ask the questions which prey on every writer's mind, and hopefully take some of the pain out of querying. These are questions that I've seen tossed around on twitter and writing sites like Agent Query Connect. They are the type of questions that you need answers for the real expert--agents!
This week's interview is with Bree Ogden of D4EO. Bree represents categories from picture books to YA, NA and adult. For more on Bree, including her wishlist, check out her bio here.
Is there a better or worse time of year to query?No, it's all the same for me. Well. I guess that's not completely accurate. There are times that are way more hectic in my career, but there is no way of knowing when those times will hit. If I knew when I was going to be buried in work, I could give you a solid answer, but we never know. So query whenever! Queries will always be tended to, no matter how busy I am. It might just take a little longer.
Does one typo or misplaced comma shoot down the entire query?No. But two or three might. So many people reading this interview have probably heard this quite often: literary agents get so many queries, we start to get insanely picky about which queries we read all the way to the end. One mistake won't kill it, but a two...three... that starts the querier on a path to the trash bin.
Do you look at sample pages without fail or only if the query is strong?If I have no interest in the query, I don't even glance at the sample pages. If the query is strong, I will glance over them to see if the writing holds a candle to the plot idea, if so, I'm always too eager to request the manuscript to actually read the sample pages. I want to see the whole thing ASAP!
Do you have an assistant or intern go through your queries first or do you check all of them?I've had many slush interns in the past but I make sure that all queries are looked over by both myself and my interns. They simply weed out the ones that are absolutely not my tastes. I recently handed over the best intern known to man, Maria Vicente, to become a literary agent herself (at P.S. Literary). And after her, I've decided to go intern-less for a bit... for personal reasons. Nothing scandalous. I just want complete autonomy over my slush. For now. Not sure how long it will last. :)
If the manuscript has a prologue, do you want it included with the sample pages?People ask me this a lot and I never know how to respond. Yes? Honestly, I look at the sample pages to get a sense of the writing. You can't determine anything about the plot from five sample pages. So prologue or not, I just want to see how you write.
Some agencies mention querying only one agent at a time and some say query only one agent period. How often do you pass a query along to a fellow agent who might be more interested?Are you referring to agents within the same agency? Never query more than one agent in the same agency at the same time. Perhaps you can query more than one agent at the same agency after one has passed on your manuscript or query, but always use full disclosure and check submission guidelines before you do so.
If you are referring to agents in general--agents from all different agencies--never send out one query at a time. That's preposterous. It would take you eons to find an agent if you were only querying one at a time. Query wide.
But something makes me think you are referring to agents within the same agency. A lot of agencies have the policy, "A pass from one of us is a pass for the agency." D4EO doesn't strictly go by that rule, we will send things to each other if we think it's a better fit for them, but it's rare. Because honestly, if a project is good, you're going to want to represent it yourself.
Do you prefer a little personalized chit-chat in a query letter, or would you rather hear about the manuscript?A little is fine. it's nice to know that they are not just sending out mass queries to mass amounts of agents without even knowing who they are sending to. It's also nice to know a little about thee writer as a person. I've had people write things like, "I'm a fellow journalist with a penchant for all things dark so I thought you'd be perfect to query with my new manuscript." That lets me know they did their research while simultaneously giving me a glimpse into their life.
But don't go overboard. One to two personal sentences is about all you should give. We are mostly interested in the manuscript. And somewhat going along with this, do not try to friend an agent on Facebook or tweet them incessantly right before you query them (or during, or after). It's very see-through and a bit of a turn off.
Most agents have said they don’t care whether the word count/genre sentence comes first or last. But is it a red flag if one component is not included?As long as it is in the query, we are golden. I tend to prefer the genre/age group first, before I get into the meat of the query. Word count can be plugged in wherever.
Writers hear a lot about limiting the number of named characters in a query. Do you feel keeping named characters to a certain number makes for a clearer query?Absolutely. Think of a query as the back copy of a book. Too many characters, too many plot lines, too many things for the agent to try and comprehend... it's, as you can guess, too much. One or two main characters should be highlighted in the query. More than three starts to muddle the plot and I, personally, lose interest.
Should writers sweat the title of their book (and character names) or is that something that is often changed by publishers?Don't sweat it. It's often changed. Well the title at least. A title/character name won't make or break an agent's decision. But be aware of books that have recently been released with the same title. I was queried with a book called THE LINE, which is the exact title of a book I had just sold. Again, not a deal breaker, but I did think it was funny.
How many queries do you receive in a week? How many requests might you make out of those?Honestly, no idea... anywhere between 100-200? And I request about 2-3 a week, on a good week...
Many agents say they don't care if writers are active online. Could a twitter account or blog presence by a writer tip the scales in getting a request or offer? And do you require writers you sign to start one?No I don't require it. It's nice, in my opinion, to have a social media presence. But I would never force that on someone. The only reason I appreciate it in writers who are querying me is because we like to stalk you just like you stalk us. If I am super interested in a query, I want to know all about the writer. The internet helps out with that. ;)
Some writers have asked about including links to their blogs or manuscript-related artwork. I’m sure it’s not appropriate to add those links in a query, but are links in an email signature offensive?I don't find links to be a bad thing in any part of the query OR the signature. Attachments are not welcome (unless specifically asked for) but links to artwork, blogs, websites, or portfolios are totally fine!
If a writer makes changes to their manuscript due to feedback should they resend the query or only if material was requested?This greatly varies from agent to agent. So I can only answer for myself. If I haven't requested your manuscript (or passed on it), I don't like getting a second query UNLESS it has had a massive overhaul. Like MASSIVE. Because that could really change my mind. If I have your full manuscript and you have made some major changes, yes, I need to know. But it's really important to be completely sure of your manuscript before you send it out. Having to retract queries or manuscripts makes you look unprofessional and unsure of your work.
What bio should an author with no publishing credits include?Their name, where they are from, their education, a few personal interests... that's all fine. We LOVE debut authors so we don't expect huge CVs with every query.
What does ‘just not right mean for me’ mean to you?Uhm... Haha. It means exactly what it says. :)
If I say something is not right for me, it's just not something I want to represent because, well, it's just not right for me. Either I don't like the concept or I know there are a million other agents out there that could do a better job with it. What themes are you sick of seeing?Orphaned, hard-assed teen has the key to saving humanity hidden within. I get it a few times a week.
Do you consider yourself a hands-on, editorial type of agent?Yes, absolutely.
What three things are at the top of your submission wish list?If you follow me on twitter, you already know these. I am dying for a horror manuscript with extreme body modification along the lines of the horror film AMERICAN MARY. I would love a LARPing-gone-wrong story along the lines of the film KNIGHTS OF BADASSDOM, a perfect mix of horror and humor. And I am always looking for that perfect slasher horror YA novel... FRIDAY THE 13TH in YA novel form.
What are some of your favorite movies or books to give us an idea of your tastes? Movies: American Mary, Cabin in the Woods, Perfect Sense, Jeux d'enfants, Brick, The Loved Ones, Memento. Books: Wuthering Heights, Frankenstein, The Monstumologist series, anything by Chuck Palahniuk, Irvine Welsh, Chuck Wendig, Chuck Klosterman, Nick Hornby, HP Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe, Edward Gorey, Katie McGarry, Ransom Riggs. The list could go on forever.
----------------------------------------------------------
Bree Ogden joined D4EO in November 2011, after having been an associate literary agent at Martin Literary Management for nearly 2 years representing children’s, YA, and graphic novels.Bree graduated with her BA in Philosophy from Southern Virginia University where she served as editor-in-chief of the University’s newsmagazine. She was awarded Most Valuable Player and Editor of the Year, as well as SVU’s Pioneer Award, an honor the University awards to two students each year. She then received her MA in Journalism with an emphasis in editing and expository writing at Northeastern University where she worked on both the New England Press Association Bulletin, and also served as the features editor of the premier campus music magazine, Tastemakers Magazine.Bree has spent many years working as a freelance journalist and currently co-operates the macabre children’s magazine
Underneath the Juniper Tree
where she serves as Editorial Director. Bree is also an instructor and columnist for the Web site LitReactor.com where she teaches Intro to Comic Book & Graphic Novel Writing. Bree is also a judge for the Ghastly Awards–Honoring Excellence in Horror Comics and writes about comics for her favorite horror Web site, BloodyDisgusting.com.
Here to relieve some of that endless worrying is a new series of posts called Query Questions. I'll ask the questions which prey on every writer's mind, and hopefully take some of the pain out of querying. These are questions that I've seen tossed around on twitter and writing sites like Agent Query Connect. They are the type of questions that you need answers for the real expert--agents!
This week's interview is with Bree Ogden of D4EO. Bree represents categories from picture books to YA, NA and adult. For more on Bree, including her wishlist, check out her bio here.
Is there a better or worse time of year to query?No, it's all the same for me. Well. I guess that's not completely accurate. There are times that are way more hectic in my career, but there is no way of knowing when those times will hit. If I knew when I was going to be buried in work, I could give you a solid answer, but we never know. So query whenever! Queries will always be tended to, no matter how busy I am. It might just take a little longer.
Does one typo or misplaced comma shoot down the entire query?No. But two or three might. So many people reading this interview have probably heard this quite often: literary agents get so many queries, we start to get insanely picky about which queries we read all the way to the end. One mistake won't kill it, but a two...three... that starts the querier on a path to the trash bin.
Do you look at sample pages without fail or only if the query is strong?If I have no interest in the query, I don't even glance at the sample pages. If the query is strong, I will glance over them to see if the writing holds a candle to the plot idea, if so, I'm always too eager to request the manuscript to actually read the sample pages. I want to see the whole thing ASAP!
Do you have an assistant or intern go through your queries first or do you check all of them?I've had many slush interns in the past but I make sure that all queries are looked over by both myself and my interns. They simply weed out the ones that are absolutely not my tastes. I recently handed over the best intern known to man, Maria Vicente, to become a literary agent herself (at P.S. Literary). And after her, I've decided to go intern-less for a bit... for personal reasons. Nothing scandalous. I just want complete autonomy over my slush. For now. Not sure how long it will last. :)
If the manuscript has a prologue, do you want it included with the sample pages?People ask me this a lot and I never know how to respond. Yes? Honestly, I look at the sample pages to get a sense of the writing. You can't determine anything about the plot from five sample pages. So prologue or not, I just want to see how you write.
Some agencies mention querying only one agent at a time and some say query only one agent period. How often do you pass a query along to a fellow agent who might be more interested?Are you referring to agents within the same agency? Never query more than one agent in the same agency at the same time. Perhaps you can query more than one agent at the same agency after one has passed on your manuscript or query, but always use full disclosure and check submission guidelines before you do so.
If you are referring to agents in general--agents from all different agencies--never send out one query at a time. That's preposterous. It would take you eons to find an agent if you were only querying one at a time. Query wide.
But something makes me think you are referring to agents within the same agency. A lot of agencies have the policy, "A pass from one of us is a pass for the agency." D4EO doesn't strictly go by that rule, we will send things to each other if we think it's a better fit for them, but it's rare. Because honestly, if a project is good, you're going to want to represent it yourself.
Do you prefer a little personalized chit-chat in a query letter, or would you rather hear about the manuscript?A little is fine. it's nice to know that they are not just sending out mass queries to mass amounts of agents without even knowing who they are sending to. It's also nice to know a little about thee writer as a person. I've had people write things like, "I'm a fellow journalist with a penchant for all things dark so I thought you'd be perfect to query with my new manuscript." That lets me know they did their research while simultaneously giving me a glimpse into their life.
But don't go overboard. One to two personal sentences is about all you should give. We are mostly interested in the manuscript. And somewhat going along with this, do not try to friend an agent on Facebook or tweet them incessantly right before you query them (or during, or after). It's very see-through and a bit of a turn off.
Most agents have said they don’t care whether the word count/genre sentence comes first or last. But is it a red flag if one component is not included?As long as it is in the query, we are golden. I tend to prefer the genre/age group first, before I get into the meat of the query. Word count can be plugged in wherever.
Writers hear a lot about limiting the number of named characters in a query. Do you feel keeping named characters to a certain number makes for a clearer query?Absolutely. Think of a query as the back copy of a book. Too many characters, too many plot lines, too many things for the agent to try and comprehend... it's, as you can guess, too much. One or two main characters should be highlighted in the query. More than three starts to muddle the plot and I, personally, lose interest.
Should writers sweat the title of their book (and character names) or is that something that is often changed by publishers?Don't sweat it. It's often changed. Well the title at least. A title/character name won't make or break an agent's decision. But be aware of books that have recently been released with the same title. I was queried with a book called THE LINE, which is the exact title of a book I had just sold. Again, not a deal breaker, but I did think it was funny.
How many queries do you receive in a week? How many requests might you make out of those?Honestly, no idea... anywhere between 100-200? And I request about 2-3 a week, on a good week...
Many agents say they don't care if writers are active online. Could a twitter account or blog presence by a writer tip the scales in getting a request or offer? And do you require writers you sign to start one?No I don't require it. It's nice, in my opinion, to have a social media presence. But I would never force that on someone. The only reason I appreciate it in writers who are querying me is because we like to stalk you just like you stalk us. If I am super interested in a query, I want to know all about the writer. The internet helps out with that. ;)
Some writers have asked about including links to their blogs or manuscript-related artwork. I’m sure it’s not appropriate to add those links in a query, but are links in an email signature offensive?I don't find links to be a bad thing in any part of the query OR the signature. Attachments are not welcome (unless specifically asked for) but links to artwork, blogs, websites, or portfolios are totally fine!
If a writer makes changes to their manuscript due to feedback should they resend the query or only if material was requested?This greatly varies from agent to agent. So I can only answer for myself. If I haven't requested your manuscript (or passed on it), I don't like getting a second query UNLESS it has had a massive overhaul. Like MASSIVE. Because that could really change my mind. If I have your full manuscript and you have made some major changes, yes, I need to know. But it's really important to be completely sure of your manuscript before you send it out. Having to retract queries or manuscripts makes you look unprofessional and unsure of your work.
What bio should an author with no publishing credits include?Their name, where they are from, their education, a few personal interests... that's all fine. We LOVE debut authors so we don't expect huge CVs with every query.
What does ‘just not right mean for me’ mean to you?Uhm... Haha. It means exactly what it says. :)
If I say something is not right for me, it's just not something I want to represent because, well, it's just not right for me. Either I don't like the concept or I know there are a million other agents out there that could do a better job with it. What themes are you sick of seeing?Orphaned, hard-assed teen has the key to saving humanity hidden within. I get it a few times a week.
Do you consider yourself a hands-on, editorial type of agent?Yes, absolutely.
What three things are at the top of your submission wish list?If you follow me on twitter, you already know these. I am dying for a horror manuscript with extreme body modification along the lines of the horror film AMERICAN MARY. I would love a LARPing-gone-wrong story along the lines of the film KNIGHTS OF BADASSDOM, a perfect mix of horror and humor. And I am always looking for that perfect slasher horror YA novel... FRIDAY THE 13TH in YA novel form.
What are some of your favorite movies or books to give us an idea of your tastes? Movies: American Mary, Cabin in the Woods, Perfect Sense, Jeux d'enfants, Brick, The Loved Ones, Memento. Books: Wuthering Heights, Frankenstein, The Monstumologist series, anything by Chuck Palahniuk, Irvine Welsh, Chuck Wendig, Chuck Klosterman, Nick Hornby, HP Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe, Edward Gorey, Katie McGarry, Ransom Riggs. The list could go on forever.
----------------------------------------------------------
Bree Ogden joined D4EO in November 2011, after having been an associate literary agent at Martin Literary Management for nearly 2 years representing children’s, YA, and graphic novels.Bree graduated with her BA in Philosophy from Southern Virginia University where she served as editor-in-chief of the University’s newsmagazine. She was awarded Most Valuable Player and Editor of the Year, as well as SVU’s Pioneer Award, an honor the University awards to two students each year. She then received her MA in Journalism with an emphasis in editing and expository writing at Northeastern University where she worked on both the New England Press Association Bulletin, and also served as the features editor of the premier campus music magazine, Tastemakers Magazine.Bree has spent many years working as a freelance journalist and currently co-operates the macabre children’s magazine
Underneath the Juniper Tree
where she serves as Editorial Director. Bree is also an instructor and columnist for the Web site LitReactor.com where she teaches Intro to Comic Book & Graphic Novel Writing. Bree is also a judge for the Ghastly Awards–Honoring Excellence in Horror Comics and writes about comics for her favorite horror Web site, BloodyDisgusting.com.
November 18, 2013
Fall Query Extravaganza 11
I'll be doing a limited number of query critiques this fall.
Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Kelsey Friedman is killed each time she turns 18.
She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins, but one of the assassins can’t be born if Kelsey dies. A paradox is created and time loops—the first eighteen years of her life repeat over and over again. Her only warning is déjà vu. Until a man named James contacts her.
Claiming to be from the future, James explains the time loop to Kelsey and says he has been sent to save her and resolve the paradox. Despite her many doubts, Kelsey cooperates with James and they work to draw the assassins into a trap. But everything goes terribly wrong when it becomes clear to Kelsey that James is hiding something from her: His real mission.
WHEN TIME ENDS is a 73,000 word YA science-fiction thriller.
My thoughts:
Kelsey Friedman is killed each time she turns 18. First thoughts: This puts more questions into my head. Why use 'is killed' instead of dies? 'Each time' is interesting. I'd spell out 18-eighteen. On my second pass, I think getting something about this being a time story into the hook would be a good thing. A paradox has Kelsey Friedman doomed to be killed each time she turns eighteen.
She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins, but one of the assassins can’t be born if Kelsey dies. I want a little more information on the second part of this sentence. Why can't he be born? Maybe be more specific. She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins. Only Future Kelsey is supposed to cure one of the assassin's mother of cancer, or he won't be born. A paradox is created and time loops—the first eighteen years of her life repeat over and over again. Her only warning is déjà vu (expand just a little? Her only warning is the tingle of deja vu?). Until a man named James contacts her. All subjective, but this has me really curious. I'm eager to see more.
Claiming to be from the future, James explains the time loop to Kelsey and says he has been sent to save her and resolve the paradox (This sentence falls a little flat. Some of it I think can be left unsaid. It would be understood by the reader. I'd like a little more of their personality in this paragraph. But can she believe a dashing/crazy stranger, claiming to be visiting the past to save her life?) Despite her many doubts, Kelsey cooperates(Is there a way for more voice to show Kelsey's personality? Trusting her instincts, Kelsey rolls the dice, working with James to draw the assassins into a trap. with James(comma) and they work to draw the assassins into a trap. But everything goes terribly wrong when it's crystal clear becomes clear to Kelsey that James is hiding something from her: (a dash instead?) His real mission. Not the traditional sinker summing up the stakes sentence, but I like it. I think it works. Other opinions?
WHEN TIME ENDS is a 73,000 word YA science-fiction thriller. Good word count. Everything here you need.
Call it subjective, but I'm a sucker for this time story. I found it enticing. It's sort of refreshing that you don't use the traditional this has to happen OR this bad thing will occur. What does everyone else think?
Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Kelsey Friedman is killed each time she turns 18.
She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins, but one of the assassins can’t be born if Kelsey dies. A paradox is created and time loops—the first eighteen years of her life repeat over and over again. Her only warning is déjà vu. Until a man named James contacts her.
Claiming to be from the future, James explains the time loop to Kelsey and says he has been sent to save her and resolve the paradox. Despite her many doubts, Kelsey cooperates with James and they work to draw the assassins into a trap. But everything goes terribly wrong when it becomes clear to Kelsey that James is hiding something from her: His real mission.
WHEN TIME ENDS is a 73,000 word YA science-fiction thriller.
My thoughts:
Kelsey Friedman is killed each time she turns 18. First thoughts: This puts more questions into my head. Why use 'is killed' instead of dies? 'Each time' is interesting. I'd spell out 18-eighteen. On my second pass, I think getting something about this being a time story into the hook would be a good thing. A paradox has Kelsey Friedman doomed to be killed each time she turns eighteen.
She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins, but one of the assassins can’t be born if Kelsey dies. I want a little more information on the second part of this sentence. Why can't he be born? Maybe be more specific. She is shot during her birthday party by two assassins. Only Future Kelsey is supposed to cure one of the assassin's mother of cancer, or he won't be born. A paradox is created and time loops—the first eighteen years of her life repeat over and over again. Her only warning is déjà vu (expand just a little? Her only warning is the tingle of deja vu?). Until a man named James contacts her. All subjective, but this has me really curious. I'm eager to see more.
Claiming to be from the future, James explains the time loop to Kelsey and says he has been sent to save her and resolve the paradox (This sentence falls a little flat. Some of it I think can be left unsaid. It would be understood by the reader. I'd like a little more of their personality in this paragraph. But can she believe a dashing/crazy stranger, claiming to be visiting the past to save her life?) Despite her many doubts, Kelsey cooperates(Is there a way for more voice to show Kelsey's personality? Trusting her instincts, Kelsey rolls the dice, working with James to draw the assassins into a trap. with James(comma) and they work to draw the assassins into a trap. But everything goes terribly wrong when it's crystal clear becomes clear to Kelsey that James is hiding something from her: (a dash instead?) His real mission. Not the traditional sinker summing up the stakes sentence, but I like it. I think it works. Other opinions?
WHEN TIME ENDS is a 73,000 word YA science-fiction thriller. Good word count. Everything here you need.
Call it subjective, but I'm a sucker for this time story. I found it enticing. It's sort of refreshing that you don't use the traditional this has to happen OR this bad thing will occur. What does everyone else think?
November 15, 2013
Valuable Links: Check and double check
Scams abound everywhere, even in publishing. You can never be too careful. Most of these are pretty well known websites, but here are some places where you can check out agents and publishers or get more information on what a scam looks like.
Preditors and Editors- a listing of agents and publishers with ratings on who to trust. Agent Query- if an agent is listed here, they are probably safe. Gives details on genre, guidelines.Query Tracker - ditto. gives details on genre, guidelines.Absolute write forums- discussions of agents and publishers done by writers. More likely to have rumors than guaranteed facts, but still great information.Writer's Beware Blog- info on who to avoid.SFWA Writer's Beware- lots of info on what to avoid and dubious things to look out for.
Got another place you trust for information? Share it in the comments.
Preditors and Editors- a listing of agents and publishers with ratings on who to trust. Agent Query- if an agent is listed here, they are probably safe. Gives details on genre, guidelines.Query Tracker - ditto. gives details on genre, guidelines.Absolute write forums- discussions of agents and publishers done by writers. More likely to have rumors than guaranteed facts, but still great information.Writer's Beware Blog- info on who to avoid.SFWA Writer's Beware- lots of info on what to avoid and dubious things to look out for.
Got another place you trust for information? Share it in the comments.
November 14, 2013
Fall Query Extravaganza 10
I'll be doing a limited number of query critiques this fall.
Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Dear ,
Meet Callie. She’s eighteen, quirky, fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes.
Nine months of college down the drain, and all Callie has to show for it is her freshman thirty. But alas, life still has other crap plans for her. With a set of upcoming nuptials from hell on the horizon, for her she–devil, sister Anna, Callie is put on a strict regimen of do this do that, while relentlessly trying to avoid her once skinny–skater–boy, turned sex–god, ex best friend, Ky.
Meet Ky. He's a waste, a mechanic and a country music singer, minus the lyrics. A boy turned man with a proverbial skateboard still hung around his neck from high school days gone bad. Ky's lost, and he’d be the first to admit it. But the moment Calla Lily returns home––with cemented penis in hand––he realizes she’s exactly the muse he’s been missing.
But what do you do when life isn’t giving you what you demand of it? Well, you steal its running shoes, grab the girl of your four year long dreams, and take what’s been meant for you all along.
Well, that’s Ky’s theory anyway.It's just too bad Callie can't stop running away long enough to realize what she needs, is him.
At 99, 694 words, Finding Her Way Back is my new adult, contemporary romance novel. Finding Her Way Back may appeal to readers who love a little bit of angst, adore second chance romances, and admire the not so perfect heroine, who has zero qualms about telling people what she thinks of them.
I'm currently seeking representation for Finding Her Way back, and am hoping that you would be willing to take a chance on my fun-loving, hilarious characters. Per your submission guidelines I have pasted my synopsis and first five pages onto this email.
Finding Her Way Back is my fifth completed novel. Three of which are currently published through a small house entitled Sunshine Press. I am an active member of my local RWA in Moline Illinois, and a member of the Midwest Writing Center in Davenport Iowa.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
With my crazy comments:
Dear , Colon for a business letter.
Meet Callie. She’s eighteen, quirky, fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes. I'm not crazy about the introduction. It's totally a subjective call, but I'd go with something like: Eighteen-year-old Callie fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes. (Hoping you explain the tennis shoe thing farther down the query. If not consider putting an adjective before tennis shoes to help explain. ugly tennis shoes or required tennis shoes)
Nine months of college down the drain, and all Callie has to show for it is her freshman thirty. But alas, life still has other crap plans for her. Great voice is why I picked this for Nightmare on Query Street. With a set of upcoming nuptials from hell on the horizon, for her she–devil, sister Anna, Callie is put on a strict regimen of do this do that, while relentlessly trying to avoid her once skinny–skater–boy, turned sex–god, ex best friend, Ky. This sentence is a mouthful. Maybe slim it down by breaking it up. With her she-devil sister Anna's nuptials from hell on the horizon, Callie is put on a strict regiment of do this and go here. Being a bridesmaid/slave makes it hard to dodge her once skinny-skater best friend, turned sex god, Ky.
Meet Ky. Again subjective, but don't love the introduction. He's a waste (maybe cut this one and let the reader deduce it), a mechanic and a country music singer, minus the lyrics. A boy turned man with a proverbial skateboard still hung around his neck from wasted high school days gone bad. Ky's lost, and he’d be the first to admit it. But the moment Calla Lily returns home––with cemented penis (Eh? Not sure what this means. It's possible I'm too old to get the reference. :-)) in hand––he realizes she’s exactly the muse he’s been missing.
But what do you do when life isn’t giving you what you demand of it? Well, you steal its running shoes, grab the girl of your four year long (maybe hyphen? Any English majors out there? four-year-long) dreams, and take what’s been meant for you all along.
Well, that’s Ky’s theory anyway.It's just too bad Callie can't stop running away long enough to realize what she needs, (maybe a dash) is him.
At 99, 694 words (round to 100K or cut enough words to call it 99K), Finding Her Way Back (all capitals) is my new adult, contemporary romance novel. Finding Her Way Back It may appeal to readers who love a little bit of angst, adore second chance romances, and admire the not so perfect (hyphenate not-so-perfect) heroine, who has zero qualms about telling people what she thinks of them. (I'm on the fence about the last sentence. Your query letter should demonstrate these qualities to the reader so you don't have to list them. What is usually seen here is a comparable current book title.)
I'm currently seeking representation for Finding Her Way back, and am hoping that you would be willing to take a chance on my fun-loving, hilarious characters. Per your submission guidelines I have pasted my synopsis and first five pages onto this email. I'd probably cut all this but the last sentence, which can fit up above. You don't want to come across as a cheerleader for your own story. Plus, you're reaching dangerous territory of telling more about the story here then you do in the paragraphs about the book. It's like you're not sure the earlier paragraphs are good enough. Give yourself credit for a strong query.
Finding Her Way Back is my fifth completed novel. Three of which are currently published through a small house entitled Sunshine Press. I am an active member of my local RWA in Moline, Illinois, and a member of the Midwest Writing Center in Davenport Iowa.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
This query already is fantastic--with tons of voice! I like how quirky details tell me something about the characters. Getting the details in there are so important. The stakes aren't huge, but for a romance they seem to fit. These characters make me want to know more about them. I'd say the query does it's job of enticing.
This story has actually got an offer from a great publisher, proving it is a strong query! Congrats!
Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Dear ,
Meet Callie. She’s eighteen, quirky, fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes.
Nine months of college down the drain, and all Callie has to show for it is her freshman thirty. But alas, life still has other crap plans for her. With a set of upcoming nuptials from hell on the horizon, for her she–devil, sister Anna, Callie is put on a strict regimen of do this do that, while relentlessly trying to avoid her once skinny–skater–boy, turned sex–god, ex best friend, Ky.
Meet Ky. He's a waste, a mechanic and a country music singer, minus the lyrics. A boy turned man with a proverbial skateboard still hung around his neck from high school days gone bad. Ky's lost, and he’d be the first to admit it. But the moment Calla Lily returns home––with cemented penis in hand––he realizes she’s exactly the muse he’s been missing.
But what do you do when life isn’t giving you what you demand of it? Well, you steal its running shoes, grab the girl of your four year long dreams, and take what’s been meant for you all along.
Well, that’s Ky’s theory anyway.It's just too bad Callie can't stop running away long enough to realize what she needs, is him.
At 99, 694 words, Finding Her Way Back is my new adult, contemporary romance novel. Finding Her Way Back may appeal to readers who love a little bit of angst, adore second chance romances, and admire the not so perfect heroine, who has zero qualms about telling people what she thinks of them.
I'm currently seeking representation for Finding Her Way back, and am hoping that you would be willing to take a chance on my fun-loving, hilarious characters. Per your submission guidelines I have pasted my synopsis and first five pages onto this email.
Finding Her Way Back is my fifth completed novel. Three of which are currently published through a small house entitled Sunshine Press. I am an active member of my local RWA in Moline Illinois, and a member of the Midwest Writing Center in Davenport Iowa.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
With my crazy comments:
Dear , Colon for a business letter.
Meet Callie. She’s eighteen, quirky, fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes. I'm not crazy about the introduction. It's totally a subjective call, but I'd go with something like: Eighteen-year-old Callie fears high heels and commitments. She also has a serious love/hate relationship with her tennis shoes. (Hoping you explain the tennis shoe thing farther down the query. If not consider putting an adjective before tennis shoes to help explain. ugly tennis shoes or required tennis shoes)
Nine months of college down the drain, and all Callie has to show for it is her freshman thirty. But alas, life still has other crap plans for her. Great voice is why I picked this for Nightmare on Query Street. With a set of upcoming nuptials from hell on the horizon, for her she–devil, sister Anna, Callie is put on a strict regimen of do this do that, while relentlessly trying to avoid her once skinny–skater–boy, turned sex–god, ex best friend, Ky. This sentence is a mouthful. Maybe slim it down by breaking it up. With her she-devil sister Anna's nuptials from hell on the horizon, Callie is put on a strict regiment of do this and go here. Being a bridesmaid/slave makes it hard to dodge her once skinny-skater best friend, turned sex god, Ky.
Meet Ky. Again subjective, but don't love the introduction. He's a waste (maybe cut this one and let the reader deduce it), a mechanic and a country music singer, minus the lyrics. A boy turned man with a proverbial skateboard still hung around his neck from wasted high school days gone bad. Ky's lost, and he’d be the first to admit it. But the moment Calla Lily returns home––with cemented penis (Eh? Not sure what this means. It's possible I'm too old to get the reference. :-)) in hand––he realizes she’s exactly the muse he’s been missing.
But what do you do when life isn’t giving you what you demand of it? Well, you steal its running shoes, grab the girl of your four year long (maybe hyphen? Any English majors out there? four-year-long) dreams, and take what’s been meant for you all along.
Well, that’s Ky’s theory anyway.It's just too bad Callie can't stop running away long enough to realize what she needs, (maybe a dash) is him.
At 99, 694 words (round to 100K or cut enough words to call it 99K), Finding Her Way Back (all capitals) is my new adult, contemporary romance novel. Finding Her Way Back It may appeal to readers who love a little bit of angst, adore second chance romances, and admire the not so perfect (hyphenate not-so-perfect) heroine, who has zero qualms about telling people what she thinks of them. (I'm on the fence about the last sentence. Your query letter should demonstrate these qualities to the reader so you don't have to list them. What is usually seen here is a comparable current book title.)
I'm currently seeking representation for Finding Her Way back, and am hoping that you would be willing to take a chance on my fun-loving, hilarious characters. Per your submission guidelines I have pasted my synopsis and first five pages onto this email. I'd probably cut all this but the last sentence, which can fit up above. You don't want to come across as a cheerleader for your own story. Plus, you're reaching dangerous territory of telling more about the story here then you do in the paragraphs about the book. It's like you're not sure the earlier paragraphs are good enough. Give yourself credit for a strong query.
Finding Her Way Back is my fifth completed novel. Three of which are currently published through a small house entitled Sunshine Press. I am an active member of my local RWA in Moline, Illinois, and a member of the Midwest Writing Center in Davenport Iowa.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
This query already is fantastic--with tons of voice! I like how quirky details tell me something about the characters. Getting the details in there are so important. The stakes aren't huge, but for a romance they seem to fit. These characters make me want to know more about them. I'd say the query does it's job of enticing.
This story has actually got an offer from a great publisher, proving it is a strong query! Congrats!
November 13, 2013
Kindar's Cure is in Bookstores + New Contest
Sort of. Kindar is in one bookstore! A friend got copies into the store where she works, Indy Reads Books, in Indianapolis! I really appreciate her efforts. Friends are the best!
Look, I'm right next to Suzanne Collins and Catching Fire. How cool is that!
Aren't contests the best! When my blog hits 99K page views I'll load a rafflecopter. Leave a way to contact you and you could win a query + first chapter critique when the blog reaches 100K! Just be a blog and twitter follower.
Look, I'm right next to Suzanne Collins and Catching Fire. How cool is that!
Aren't contests the best! When my blog hits 99K page views I'll load a rafflecopter. Leave a way to contact you and you could win a query + first chapter critique when the blog reaches 100K! Just be a blog and twitter follower.
November 12, 2013
Query Questions with Beth Miller
Writers have copious amounts of imagination. It's what makes their stories so fantastic. But there's a darker side to so much out of the box thinking. When a writer is in the query trenches, their worries go into overdrive. They start pulling out their hair and imagine every possible disaster.
Here to relieve some of that endless worrying is a new series of posts called Query Questions. I'll ask the questions which prey on every writer's mind, and hopefully take some of the pain out of querying. These are questions that I've seen tossed around on twitter and writing sites like Agent Query Connect. They are the type of questions that you need answers for the real expert--agents!
A warm welcome to Beth Miller a junior agent with Writer's House! Here's a perfect opportunity to meet a new agent who is actively looking for clients. If you'd rather send an email query than a snail mail to Beth, follow these directions: They can query bmiller@writershouse.com, with the first 10 pages and a synopsis pasted in to an email. No attachments, please!
Is there a better or worse time of year to query? BM: I would maybe avoid querying just before (or just after) the Christmas-New Year’s break, just because we’re either trying to clear our desks before the holiday, or swamped with emails just after the holiday, but otherwise, not really.
Does one typo or misplaced comma shoot down the entire query?BM: Not really in the manuscript pages—a typo is a typo, but I would definitely proofread the heck out of your query and maybe get someone else to give it a look—it probably won’t shoot down the whole thing, but it is your first chance to impress an agent, and if you have a mistake or two, it may send the impression that you didn’t put the time in to do it right.
Do you look at sample pages without fail or only if the query is strong?BM: only if the query speaks to me, generally.
Do you have an assistant or intern go through your queries first or do you check all of them?BM: I look at them, but I may enlist an intern to help me go through requested pages.
If the manuscript has a prologue, do you want it included with the sample pages?BM: Yes. But if you don’t think the prologue would impress me enough to include it, then maybe it doesn’t belong in your manuscript, so think about that, too!
Some agencies mention querying only one agent at a time and some say query only one agent period. How often do you pass a query along to a fellow agent who might be more interested?BM: You should definitely query only one agent per agency at a time. Imagine how awkward it would be for multiple agents at the same company to want to represent you. And check the agency’s guidelines—often, a pass from one is not a pass from all, but that may not always be the case. And if I get a query that I think might appeal to a colleague, I will usually forward it to that colleague. But that doesn’t mean that if I pass, you can’t try someone else here.
Do you prefer a little personalized chit-chat in a query letter, or would you rather hear about the manuscript?BM: I’m not a fan of chit-chat. A query should be one page long, and should include a paragraph or two about the book, including word count and genre, and maybe a comp title and why you’re querying me (ex: you saw an interview, you met me at a conference, you were referred by someone, your work is similar to a project I represent, etc.), and then a brief bio of yourself, including any publishing credentials or relevant info (ex: you have a degree in medieval history and your book is set in that time period). That’s it, really. Even if it’s an email query, paste it into a word doc first to see how long it is. If it’s longer than a page, trim it. Chit chat takes up space in which you should be describing your book.
Most agents have said they don’t care whether the word count/genre sentence comes first or last. But is it a red flag if one component is not included? BM: It really should be there somewhere, whether it’s the first line or toward the end. We need to know this info.
Writers hear a lot about limiting the number of named characters in a query. Do you feel keeping named characters to a certain number makes for a clearer query?BM: Definitely keep the named characters to a minimum in the query. Your book description in a query should be similar to the cover/jacket copy of a book. Those are generally 1-2 paragraphs, and focus on the main character/s and major plot arc.
Should writers sweat the title of their book (and character names) or is that something that is often changed by publishers? BM: You should take the time to come up with a suitable title and character names. Often, a publisher (or agent) will change a title, but you still want to put in the effort. If I get a query for a manuscript, and it says something about it being untitled, that would make me think twice.
How many queries do you receive in a week? How many requests might you make out of those?BM: It really varies, but between 25 and 40, I’d say, on an average. And whether I request materials really depends on whether the queries intrigue me—I may ask for materials on ten of them, or none at all.
Many agents say they don't care if writers are active online. Could a twitter account or blog presence by a writer tip the scales in getting a request or offer? And do you require writers you sign to start one?BM: I don’t necessarily require it, but I do think an online presence can be helpful, and will almost certainly be necessary if you get a publishing contract.
Some writers have asked about including links to their blogs or manuscript-related artwork. I’m sure it’s not appropriate to add those links in a query, but are links in an email signature offensive?BM: I would maybe not put them in an email signature, and maybe include them in the query if they’re relevant. But keep in mind that sometimes an external link might trigger a spam filter, so your email might get stuck.
If a writer makes changes to their manuscript due to feedback should they resend the query or only if material was requested?BM: If I’ve requested pages and have turned you down, you can feel free to re-query me if you’ve significantly revised, and I may ask to see it again if I liked the premise and writing before. If I just passed on the query, then it means it didn’t speak to me, and in that case, no, I wouldn’t re-query with that project.
What bio should an author with no publishing credits include?BM: If you have no publishing credentials, you may just include a line or two about yourself, like “I live in a suburb of San Francisco with my husband and kids.” But I wouldn’t strain to come up with something. You can just simply say this is your first novel and leave it at that.
What does ‘just not right mean for me’ mean to you?BM: Exactly that. The query just doesn’t sound like something I’d be interested in. It’s impossible to quantify it; it’s just a matter of taste.
What themes are you sick of seeing?BM: I’m a little tired of paranormal and dystopian YA, especially as the market is glutted with these and it’s really hard to break in. Paranormal romance is also really hard right now.
Do you consider yourself a hands-on, editorial type of agent?BM: Yes. I will often do revisions with a client before I submit his/her project, especially if he/she is a debut author. I want to make sure that our best efforts go out to the publishers.
What’s the strangest/funniest thing you’ve seen in a query?BM: In my first week or two on the job, someone queried some creepy clown story and included an 8x10 glossy color photo of an evil clown. Terrifying. One guy queried saying that it would help him get girls if he got an agent. There are others, but it’s late in the day and I can’t think of them. Listen, don’t be a creeper in your query, and don’t send stuff with it, okay?
What are some of your favorite movies or books to give us an idea of your tastes? BM: Movies: The Lord of the Rings, How to Train Your Dragon, Thor, The Avengers, The Last of the Mohicans. Books: Anne Bishop’s Black Jewels series, Juliet Marillier’s Sevenwaters series, Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander, The Giver, the Shatter Me series by Tahereh Mafi, Suzanne Brockmann’s Troubleshooters series, the Harry Potter series, and I could go on and on…
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Beth Miller has worked with Robin Rue at Writers House since 2007. As Robin’s assistant, she has the pleasure of working with many talented and bestselling authors in a variety of genres. As a Junior Agent, she is building her list, working primarily with authors of romance, women’s fiction, and young adult.
Beth has a Bachelor’s degree in Biology and a Master’s degree in Literature. In her other life, she was a DNA sequencing technician at Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory on Long Island. She much prefers books to E. coli, and enjoys scuba diving and road trips in her spare time. She also has a fascination for all things Scottish (including, but not limited to, men in kilts).
Here to relieve some of that endless worrying is a new series of posts called Query Questions. I'll ask the questions which prey on every writer's mind, and hopefully take some of the pain out of querying. These are questions that I've seen tossed around on twitter and writing sites like Agent Query Connect. They are the type of questions that you need answers for the real expert--agents!
A warm welcome to Beth Miller a junior agent with Writer's House! Here's a perfect opportunity to meet a new agent who is actively looking for clients. If you'd rather send an email query than a snail mail to Beth, follow these directions: They can query bmiller@writershouse.com, with the first 10 pages and a synopsis pasted in to an email. No attachments, please!
Is there a better or worse time of year to query? BM: I would maybe avoid querying just before (or just after) the Christmas-New Year’s break, just because we’re either trying to clear our desks before the holiday, or swamped with emails just after the holiday, but otherwise, not really.
Does one typo or misplaced comma shoot down the entire query?BM: Not really in the manuscript pages—a typo is a typo, but I would definitely proofread the heck out of your query and maybe get someone else to give it a look—it probably won’t shoot down the whole thing, but it is your first chance to impress an agent, and if you have a mistake or two, it may send the impression that you didn’t put the time in to do it right.
Do you look at sample pages without fail or only if the query is strong?BM: only if the query speaks to me, generally.
Do you have an assistant or intern go through your queries first or do you check all of them?BM: I look at them, but I may enlist an intern to help me go through requested pages.
If the manuscript has a prologue, do you want it included with the sample pages?BM: Yes. But if you don’t think the prologue would impress me enough to include it, then maybe it doesn’t belong in your manuscript, so think about that, too!
Some agencies mention querying only one agent at a time and some say query only one agent period. How often do you pass a query along to a fellow agent who might be more interested?BM: You should definitely query only one agent per agency at a time. Imagine how awkward it would be for multiple agents at the same company to want to represent you. And check the agency’s guidelines—often, a pass from one is not a pass from all, but that may not always be the case. And if I get a query that I think might appeal to a colleague, I will usually forward it to that colleague. But that doesn’t mean that if I pass, you can’t try someone else here.
Do you prefer a little personalized chit-chat in a query letter, or would you rather hear about the manuscript?BM: I’m not a fan of chit-chat. A query should be one page long, and should include a paragraph or two about the book, including word count and genre, and maybe a comp title and why you’re querying me (ex: you saw an interview, you met me at a conference, you were referred by someone, your work is similar to a project I represent, etc.), and then a brief bio of yourself, including any publishing credentials or relevant info (ex: you have a degree in medieval history and your book is set in that time period). That’s it, really. Even if it’s an email query, paste it into a word doc first to see how long it is. If it’s longer than a page, trim it. Chit chat takes up space in which you should be describing your book.
Most agents have said they don’t care whether the word count/genre sentence comes first or last. But is it a red flag if one component is not included? BM: It really should be there somewhere, whether it’s the first line or toward the end. We need to know this info.
Writers hear a lot about limiting the number of named characters in a query. Do you feel keeping named characters to a certain number makes for a clearer query?BM: Definitely keep the named characters to a minimum in the query. Your book description in a query should be similar to the cover/jacket copy of a book. Those are generally 1-2 paragraphs, and focus on the main character/s and major plot arc.
Should writers sweat the title of their book (and character names) or is that something that is often changed by publishers? BM: You should take the time to come up with a suitable title and character names. Often, a publisher (or agent) will change a title, but you still want to put in the effort. If I get a query for a manuscript, and it says something about it being untitled, that would make me think twice.
How many queries do you receive in a week? How many requests might you make out of those?BM: It really varies, but between 25 and 40, I’d say, on an average. And whether I request materials really depends on whether the queries intrigue me—I may ask for materials on ten of them, or none at all.
Many agents say they don't care if writers are active online. Could a twitter account or blog presence by a writer tip the scales in getting a request or offer? And do you require writers you sign to start one?BM: I don’t necessarily require it, but I do think an online presence can be helpful, and will almost certainly be necessary if you get a publishing contract.
Some writers have asked about including links to their blogs or manuscript-related artwork. I’m sure it’s not appropriate to add those links in a query, but are links in an email signature offensive?BM: I would maybe not put them in an email signature, and maybe include them in the query if they’re relevant. But keep in mind that sometimes an external link might trigger a spam filter, so your email might get stuck.
If a writer makes changes to their manuscript due to feedback should they resend the query or only if material was requested?BM: If I’ve requested pages and have turned you down, you can feel free to re-query me if you’ve significantly revised, and I may ask to see it again if I liked the premise and writing before. If I just passed on the query, then it means it didn’t speak to me, and in that case, no, I wouldn’t re-query with that project.
What bio should an author with no publishing credits include?BM: If you have no publishing credentials, you may just include a line or two about yourself, like “I live in a suburb of San Francisco with my husband and kids.” But I wouldn’t strain to come up with something. You can just simply say this is your first novel and leave it at that.
What does ‘just not right mean for me’ mean to you?BM: Exactly that. The query just doesn’t sound like something I’d be interested in. It’s impossible to quantify it; it’s just a matter of taste.
What themes are you sick of seeing?BM: I’m a little tired of paranormal and dystopian YA, especially as the market is glutted with these and it’s really hard to break in. Paranormal romance is also really hard right now.
Do you consider yourself a hands-on, editorial type of agent?BM: Yes. I will often do revisions with a client before I submit his/her project, especially if he/she is a debut author. I want to make sure that our best efforts go out to the publishers.
What’s the strangest/funniest thing you’ve seen in a query?BM: In my first week or two on the job, someone queried some creepy clown story and included an 8x10 glossy color photo of an evil clown. Terrifying. One guy queried saying that it would help him get girls if he got an agent. There are others, but it’s late in the day and I can’t think of them. Listen, don’t be a creeper in your query, and don’t send stuff with it, okay?
What are some of your favorite movies or books to give us an idea of your tastes? BM: Movies: The Lord of the Rings, How to Train Your Dragon, Thor, The Avengers, The Last of the Mohicans. Books: Anne Bishop’s Black Jewels series, Juliet Marillier’s Sevenwaters series, Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander, The Giver, the Shatter Me series by Tahereh Mafi, Suzanne Brockmann’s Troubleshooters series, the Harry Potter series, and I could go on and on…
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Beth Miller has worked with Robin Rue at Writers House since 2007. As Robin’s assistant, she has the pleasure of working with many talented and bestselling authors in a variety of genres. As a Junior Agent, she is building her list, working primarily with authors of romance, women’s fiction, and young adult.
Beth has a Bachelor’s degree in Biology and a Master’s degree in Literature. In her other life, she was a DNA sequencing technician at Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory on Long Island. She much prefers books to E. coli, and enjoys scuba diving and road trips in her spare time. She also has a fascination for all things Scottish (including, but not limited to, men in kilts).
November 11, 2013
Fall Query Extravaganza 9
I'll be doing a limited number of query critiques this fall.
Once again my query queue is full. Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Coby married a guy who should be dead. Coby knows firsthand the toll mental illness takes on families: his husband has battled mental illness for years. Even when his husband’s depression and anxiety are under control, there are still days when it all gets to be too much.Coby's pretty sure he's prepared for just about anything life can throw at him. After all, he and his husband have been through all kinds of hell. If Coby's marriage can survive his husband's drug problems and mental illness, it can survive anything. But it might not survive the worst of their bad days. When his husband's mental illness takes a turn for the worst everything comes into question.Two weeks on psych is just the beginning of the hell Coby and his husband will go through. Weeks of fighting and gallons of tears come to a head in a violent confrontation that leave both questioning their sanity and just how much "until death do us part" really meant.RESCUE ME is LGBT commercial fiction complete at _____ words with series potential. I have most recently been accepted into the Elephant’s Book Press Winter Anthology with my short story ANGUISH. Thank you for your time and consideration.
With my crazy comments:This query came with no greeting. I'm sure you know what that should look like. Other than that, the first thing I noticed was that the 1st three paragraphs all start with the same word. Not sure if that was done on purpose by the author, but it might also stick out to agents as a little odd.Coby married a guy who should be dead. My first LGBT critique. Nice short hook, I suspect agents would read on. Coby knows firsthand the toll mental illness takes on families: his husband has battled mental illness for years. Hmm. As I said before, I'm not a big fan of colons in queries. Subjective thing so feel free to ignore. Also the hook made me think this is a recent love affair, but this sentence made me question that assumption. And this turn is also unexpected. I figured crime or some other violent reason for being dead. Even when his husband’s depression and anxiety are under control, there are still days when it all gets to be Simpler and shorter to use 'is' here. You don't want to be wordy. too much.Coby's pretty sure he's prepared for just about anything life can throw at him. Generic. Generic is dull. A specific something/detail would be more interesting. After all, he and his husband have been through all kinds of hell. Again generic or cliche. If Coby's marriage can survive his husband's drug problems and mental illness, it can survive anything. But it might not survive the worst of their bad days. When his husband's mental illness takes a turn for the worst everything comes into question. Except for the drug usage, this paragraph pretty much just restates what we've already learned. There are no specific details to drive this forward. I'm looking for new information. How do they handle it? What direction does his husband's bad days take?Two weeks on psych is just the beginning of the hell Coby and his husband will go through. (Here we have a specific detail, but it feels like the query is stuck. We're not moving beyond what was said in the second paragraph. Why is his husband having these problems? How does Coby feel about it? What were they like together as a couple before all this happened?) Weeks of fighting and gallons of tears come to a head in a violent confrontation that leave both questioning their sanity and just how much "until death do us part" really meant. I'd like the stakes to be more specific. This seems a little weak. It could be because I normally avoid books with 'gallons of tears.' Others weigh in on this sinker line. Does it work for you? RESCUE ME is LGBT commercial fiction complete at _____ words with series potential. (I'm wondering if series mileage is possible from a marriage/mental illness story. Wouldn't those problems be resolved by the end of the story? I'm guessing the book isn't finished yet, thus the lack of word count.) I have most recently been accepted into the Elephant’s Book Press Winter Anthology with my short story ANGUISH. Thank you for your time and consideration. Solid standard ending and nice bio.
I'm thinking this query is only skimming the surface of the story. You need to dig deeper and give us more. Make us care about them as people. Show us what they were like as a couple before the husband spiraled into his problems. Then lead us down the road of what happens to them. How does Coby feel about it? This query should almost be in Coby's POV. Maybe try writing one from his prospective, then change it to the more distant query POV.
Also I recommend using the husband's name. There are no places or other people to confuse. It's safe to use two names for this query.
Once again my query queue is full. Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Coby married a guy who should be dead. Coby knows firsthand the toll mental illness takes on families: his husband has battled mental illness for years. Even when his husband’s depression and anxiety are under control, there are still days when it all gets to be too much.Coby's pretty sure he's prepared for just about anything life can throw at him. After all, he and his husband have been through all kinds of hell. If Coby's marriage can survive his husband's drug problems and mental illness, it can survive anything. But it might not survive the worst of their bad days. When his husband's mental illness takes a turn for the worst everything comes into question.Two weeks on psych is just the beginning of the hell Coby and his husband will go through. Weeks of fighting and gallons of tears come to a head in a violent confrontation that leave both questioning their sanity and just how much "until death do us part" really meant.RESCUE ME is LGBT commercial fiction complete at _____ words with series potential. I have most recently been accepted into the Elephant’s Book Press Winter Anthology with my short story ANGUISH. Thank you for your time and consideration.
With my crazy comments:This query came with no greeting. I'm sure you know what that should look like. Other than that, the first thing I noticed was that the 1st three paragraphs all start with the same word. Not sure if that was done on purpose by the author, but it might also stick out to agents as a little odd.Coby married a guy who should be dead. My first LGBT critique. Nice short hook, I suspect agents would read on. Coby knows firsthand the toll mental illness takes on families: his husband has battled mental illness for years. Hmm. As I said before, I'm not a big fan of colons in queries. Subjective thing so feel free to ignore. Also the hook made me think this is a recent love affair, but this sentence made me question that assumption. And this turn is also unexpected. I figured crime or some other violent reason for being dead. Even when his husband’s depression and anxiety are under control, there are still days when it all gets to be Simpler and shorter to use 'is' here. You don't want to be wordy. too much.Coby's pretty sure he's prepared for just about anything life can throw at him. Generic. Generic is dull. A specific something/detail would be more interesting. After all, he and his husband have been through all kinds of hell. Again generic or cliche. If Coby's marriage can survive his husband's drug problems and mental illness, it can survive anything. But it might not survive the worst of their bad days. When his husband's mental illness takes a turn for the worst everything comes into question. Except for the drug usage, this paragraph pretty much just restates what we've already learned. There are no specific details to drive this forward. I'm looking for new information. How do they handle it? What direction does his husband's bad days take?Two weeks on psych is just the beginning of the hell Coby and his husband will go through. (Here we have a specific detail, but it feels like the query is stuck. We're not moving beyond what was said in the second paragraph. Why is his husband having these problems? How does Coby feel about it? What were they like together as a couple before all this happened?) Weeks of fighting and gallons of tears come to a head in a violent confrontation that leave both questioning their sanity and just how much "until death do us part" really meant. I'd like the stakes to be more specific. This seems a little weak. It could be because I normally avoid books with 'gallons of tears.' Others weigh in on this sinker line. Does it work for you? RESCUE ME is LGBT commercial fiction complete at _____ words with series potential. (I'm wondering if series mileage is possible from a marriage/mental illness story. Wouldn't those problems be resolved by the end of the story? I'm guessing the book isn't finished yet, thus the lack of word count.) I have most recently been accepted into the Elephant’s Book Press Winter Anthology with my short story ANGUISH. Thank you for your time and consideration. Solid standard ending and nice bio.
I'm thinking this query is only skimming the surface of the story. You need to dig deeper and give us more. Make us care about them as people. Show us what they were like as a couple before the husband spiraled into his problems. Then lead us down the road of what happens to them. How does Coby feel about it? This query should almost be in Coby's POV. Maybe try writing one from his prospective, then change it to the more distant query POV.
Also I recommend using the husband's name. There are no places or other people to confuse. It's safe to use two names for this query.
November 8, 2013
A VERY SPECIAL INTERVIEW WITH MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
You all know I live and breath fantasy, write it and read it. But I'm pretty particular about what I read. So when I say I've become a fan of this author, it's because his books are on my shelf of favorites. That's not a compliment I give lightly.
I'm overjoyed to have Michael J. Sullivan here to discuss his books and teach us something about his remarkable journey from small press to self-published to traditional published, all with the same series of books. He's the author of the Riyria Revelations, the Riyria Chronicles, and Hollow World series as well as some short stories.
I, and I’m sure many others, find it inspiring that you were first published with a small press, then moved to being self-published, and then got your tradition publishing deal, all with the same books, the Riyria Revelations. Can you share a little about that journey and to what do you attribute the success?
The full credit goes to my wife, who has been the architect of “the business side” of my writing. I think it illustrates a kind of persistent determination that is so important in publishing. Robin is the type of person that doesn’t let obstacle stop her. She’ll find a way to go over, dig under, or break through any wall in her path.
Decades earlier, I had tried and failed at the whole publishing game, and when I picked up the pen again it was only on the condition that I wouldn’t seek publication. But Robin was convinced that the books needed to get “out there,” so she took it upon herself to do exactly that. She sent out hundreds of query letters, persevered through the rejections, and eventually landed an agent. At the time, we thought we were on our way. A year later we still had no offers, so she moved her concentration from the big-six to the smaller independent companies. My first contract was with AMI, a small press out of Minnesota. When they fell on hard times, and couldn’t raise the money for the print run on the second book, she jumped into self-publishing. As the series neared its completion, and sales were starting to pick up, she thought it might be worth submitting to New York again, and she was right. Our agent sent the book to 17 publishers (all whom had seen the same project many years before and rejected it). Half of them expressed immediate interest, and Orbit made a really attractive pre-emptive bid…and the rest, as they say, is history.
What would you say was the hardest step along that journey? Getting your first break? Deciding to self-publish? Deciding to switch to tradition publishing? Getting an agent or something else?
Is “all of the above” too much of a copout? Seriously, though, the publishing business is rarely easy no matter which route you take. I compare publishing much like hiking in the Blue Ridge Mountains. You climb, struggling all the way, and just as you reach the crest, you look out to see row after row of other peaks extending out to the horizon. There is always a new challenge to overcome.
Having done the full gamut, I’d say that each path has its own challenges, and I wouldn’t classify one route has harder or easier than the other. I will say that getting that very first independent person who says “I like this,” is a monumental step. And it, more than any others, makes you think, “I just might be able to make this thing work, and I’m not totally delusional about my writing ability.”
One thing you would change of your writing journey, if you had a magic lamp/time machine?
Honestly, I wouldn’t change a thing about my publishing path. I think doing it the way I have has given me great perspective, which is especially important given all the flux in the publishing business right now. I’m more agile than most, because I’ve done it all and can pick and choose from a wide range of possibilities for each project. My latest novel (Hollow World – releasing in April) is a true hybrid. I sold the audio rights to one publisher, the print rights to another, but I’ve kept the ebook rights. For most authors, they just keep publishing in whatever way they started out with, and I think that they could benefit from a little more diversity.
On the writing end, I wouldn’t have taken my ten-year hiatus. At my writing pace, that could have meant another 20 – 25 books. As I get older, I realize that many of my stories will die with me, as I won’t have enough years left to write them all. At the time I quit, it seemed to make perfect sense; I had written twelve books over the course of a decade and got nowhere. To me it was all just a waste of time, but now I know it was actually laying the foundation for my second go at publishing.
You mention in the acknowledgements of The Crown Tower (recently released) giving up writing for ten years. What drove you to get back to the work of creating worlds and people?
Ha, I promise I didn’t peak ahead. It’s interesting this question follows on the heels of my regret about quitting. It was probably the confluence of a few things. · I had grown bored of the profession I had been doing (I ran my own advertising agency), and boredom has always been a catalyst for my creative endeavors.· My dyslexic daughter was having problems reading, and I wanted to give her a book to ignite a love of reading. The best way to do that was to write something myself.· Writing had always been my life’s goal, even when I was a child, and I had reached an age where if I didn’t start then, I would never do it.· For that decade when I was going “cold turkey,” the stories just kept coming to me, and they were piling up. I felt the best way to exorcise them out of my brain was to transfer the ideas to paper.
· The realization that writing and publishing don’t have to be married together. I could write books just for me, my daughter, my wife, and a few friends and the satisfaction would come from the doing…not any form of external validation.
Like George Lucas, you’ve taken your Riyria Revelations series and gone to prequels with The Crown Tower and The Rose and the Thorn . On the one hand you really know the characters well, but what is the hard part of writing prequels to a well-known series?
Well, unlike Lucas, it wasn’t planned that way. I had never intended to write any more about Royce and Hadrian other than the six books of The Riyria Revelations. But my readers, and more importantly my wife, were having major withdrawals, which made me think about writing more. Since the series was so carefully planned and executed I thought “tacking on” would be the wrong thing to do. So instead, I went to the other end of the timeline.
I think there were two difficulties. One is that there were pillars, foundations that can’t be messed with, so I’m more boxed in. The other is that my readers already know a lot, and so I have to push the envelope to grab and keep their interest. My approach was to expand on things only lightly mentioned in Revelations. Whenever I write, I employ the iceberg approach to both character and world building. Writing Chronicles allowed me to open my trunk and tell more about people and events, which only I knew about. Things like Gwen and Hildfred’s history and the circumstances that put Gwen in the right place at a very critical time.
You seem to be a people person. I see you on twitter and Goodreads. You’re very active in your own marketing and promotion. As someone who successfully self-published would you share some tips on what were your most successful promotional tools, besides writing captivating characters and engaging plotlines?
I attribute my early success to two main sources: Bloggers (who are amazingly hard working people that create works of love with little, or no, monetary reward) and Goodreads which is an amazing community of readers.
For bloggers, it’s important to treat them with the upmost respect. That means everything from doing your research before approaching them, providing them things to make their jobs easier (cover pictures, author bio, book blurbs, buy links, contact information), etc. Also you have to realize that they have a lot of people competing for their attention so you need to “pitch” your book in a way that really gets them excited. Don’t just jot of an email saying, “I wrote this book, do you want to read it?” Instead, create a “mini ad” that has a catchy headline, the book’s cover, some quotes from readers or other reviewers, and some compelling “back of the book” summarization. Again respect their time, so be short and sweet, but present your book professionally and you’ll have a better chance of being pushed to the top of their very high TBR pile.
For goodreads, and any venue where readers gather, it’s important to be a member of the community first and only bring up your books where appropriate and only if the rules allow. Some groups have designated folders for promotional activities; others forbid you mentioning your book at all. So know what you can or cannot do. If you violate the rules, the wrath will be swift and harsh. But if you participate in the discussion and are a “genuine” person, then people will take the initiative to checkout your books on their own. You don’t have to say, “buy my book” that never goes over well, but if you are engaging (and most importantly helpful) then you’ll get sales without ever saying those three words that put so many people off.
What’s the most important thing you can give a first-time reader to turn them into fans for life?
I think the first chapter of the first book of The Riyria Revelations (Theft of Swords) does a really good job at showing my style and voice. It actually reads like a self-contained short story about two guys who are being robbed in the middle of nowhere. Not only do they escape harm, but they also give the robbers pointers for future attempts. It shows the dynamic between Royce and Hadrian, and if people read that chapter and like it, it’s a pretty good bet they’ll like the rest of my writing.
Along the same lines, I also created a short story, The Viscount and the Witch which is free on all the major sites (for some reason I can’t get it free on B&N where it is $0.99, but I’ll always send free copies to people who email me). Like the start of Theft of Swords it is a short, easy to read introduction to my main characters and overall style of writing.
What do you find most fascinating about writing an epic series with multiply volumes like Riyria Revelations?
Without doubt it is the ability to weave threads and plant Easter eggs so that there are actually two stories for the reader. Each book has its own tale to tell, where there is a main conflict which is resolved fully, but there is also an over arching story and each book provides various clues, or red herrings that people can start to piece together.
Here’s an example. In the first book of Revelations, the main characters find themselves in a prison where a spell (experienced through constantly played music) dredges up a person’s worst memory, forcing them to relive it perpetually. For Hadrian, it’s killing a tiger while a crowd shouts “Gillanti.” Readers aren’t suppose to know what this means, but some will note it as important. Sure enough, several novels later (in the second book of Rise of Empire) they learn the whole story behind that memory and why it’s so painful.
Because I write the entire series before submitting them for publication (a technique I don’t recommend for new writers), I’m able to go back into earlier books and add threads when a really good idea comes up in later books.
This is something a lot of writers have heard over and over from agents: I just didn’t connect. There’s no question that your main characters are full-fleshed out. What do you think makes a main character relatable, and how do you add depth to them?
I cheat. Having a duo, rather than a single protagonist, helps me out immensely. Some will gravitate toward Royce, others Hadrian. I also get to show two sides of the same coin. Both characters wrestle with the regrets of their earlier lives, but their experiences produced different results.
For Hadrian, it makes him desire to be a hero rather than a parasitic thief for hire. He’s the more affable of the two, who is willing to lend a helping hand, as a way of paying pence for years of squandering his skills. Royce, on the other hand, was hardened by his tough upbringing. Distrustful, cynical, and much more concerned with self-preservation, he builds walls which isolate him from any chance of love or redemption. But both affect each other and while Royce is teaching Hadrian to stop being so naïve, Hadrian is earning Royce’s trust which gives him a way to break out of the prison of his own making. I think people want to be one or the other, or just have them as friends and share in their adventures.
For those that don’t have duos, my best advice is to write characters that you personally like and would enjoy spending time with. My books don’t follow the current trend in fantasy, of reprehensible characters in oppressive worlds. My characters may not win every fight, and there is death and heartbreak along the way, but I do have a dash of optimism that people enjoy when reading as a form of escapist entertainment.
There are dire words floating around about the market for fantasy. Agents proclaim no editor wants it, at least in YA. What are your predictions regarding the fantasy market?
I’ve never been “market driven” which probably explains why I failed in the early days. My mantra has been “write books I want to read,” and ultimately I’ve made that work for me. But it’s much easier to live by those words once you’ve “make it.”
I do think we have a lot of diversity right now, and there is still room for more. The truth is that no one knows what will sell, and traditional publishing has more failures than successes. The statistics I’ve seen is something like one book in five produces a profit and has to subsidize the other four that fail. You can’t really try to “time the market” as whatever you are writing now is years from release in the slow moving traditional system. To complicate matters, publishers operate with a “pack-like mentality.” There was a time with paranormal urban fantasy was hot, but once a certain sub-genre is deemed “oversaturated” they reject everything in that vein. In many ways they perpetuate the system.
The good news is there are now two sets of gatekeepers: traditional (that may lock out certain types at certain times) and self-publishing, where the readers will decide a book’s fate. So in many ways you have to “get it out there” and let the readers decide.
While you can rarely judge what will be hot, there is something that never goes out of style, and that is a good story well told. The will always be room for an engaging story with characters the readers become emotionally attached to.
I’m a firm admirer of using humor in stories. So many main characters are all with the drama and never with the quip. Your main characters never let go of their fun side. What made you decide to go in this direction with them?
I’ve made no secret that I write books that I want to read, and to me a book filled with dire people in even direr situations isn’t as entertaining as one that makes me smile or laugh. I think sometimes writers feel that adding humor brings their books down a peg, but I don’t think books that lack it are any more complex, realistic, or engaging. In fact, when it comes to realism, I think it hurts the story to omit it. We crack jokes in real life all the time, even when times are tough…or especially when they are tough. It’s a coping mechanism. As a writer we all want to touch a reader with our stories, and to me that means shedding a tear or laughing out loud. If I can do both on the same page it’s doubly sweet.
I was going to ask who your favorite character is, but that’s like asking which is your favorite child. So I’ll ask what genre is nearest your heart. You do write in a wide variety of them.
It’s funny because everyone thinks of me as a “fantasy writer” because that’s the first thing that got published, but I do write in just about every genre that exists. I wrote twelve novels during my first ten years when I was originally writing to publish. That includes: fantasy, science fiction, thrillers, mysteries, literary, coming of age, young adult, you name it. The only ones I’ve not dabbled in are romance, erotica, and westerns.
Fantasy is my first love, what got me interested in the written word. Prior to reading The Hobbit it was like pulling teeth to get me to finish a book. After it, I read extensively and writing became my favorite pastime. It will probably always have a sentimental spot in my heart because of that, but I do hope to be able to release books in a wide range of styles.
Do you rely on critique groups to go over your writing or did you hire an editor when you were starting out?
I think every author needs independent feedback. My first and most trusted source is Robin, who is great at finding plot holes, and has a really good eye for pacing and character motivation. She’s made immeasurable contributions to my work, long before anyone else sees it. I do also utilize beta testers and my critique group (shout out to the Arlington Writers Meetup). Beta testers read the full manuscript, of course, but my critique group generally only gets the first chapter. I also have a number of writer friends whose opinions I trust, and they are early readers as well.
As to editors, Avempartha was my first self-published book (actually book #2 of the series) and it had gone through the entire production cycle with AMI, so it was already professionally edited when the rights reverted. The same was true for Book #1 which eventually reverted once the print run sold out. Because both of those books were edited by AMI, we only needed to do a bit of proof reading. For book #3 (Nyphron Rising) and #4 (the Emerald Storm) we did hire freelance copy editors. Book #5 (Wintertide) was edited by Robin and a fulltime intern we had at the time, and Book #6 (Percepliquis) was edited by Orbit. Then, of course,the whole series was re-edited by Orbit once they bought it.
No interview with a writer would be complete without asking are you a pantser or plotter?
If people watched me write a book, they’d probably say plotter, because I start out with an outline and pretty much have the entire framework laid out before I sit down to start. That being said, I would actually answer that I’m both. There is no way for me to anticipate where the story will lead once actual writing begins. So I’m all for deviating from that original outline.
To me it’s like taking a trip. I know what highways I’ll take, what towns I’ll stop in for food or to sleep. But I might find a particularly interesting town and wind up staying a few days even though I had originally planned to just pass through. The side trip might even put me on the road to a different destination, but it is a “known” place. I don’t wander aimlessly, and so when I drive out of town I know where I’m now heading to.
Just for fun, silliest mistake you ever found in your own writing?
I’m famous for homophone errors, and sometimes I don’t even understand that a word that I’ve always used is actually spelled two different ways. This deficiency has made for some pretty embarrassing mistakes. The funniest of recent memory is from Hollow World. In it I have a character, who after seeing a brutal murder ended up “balling on a couch” rather than my intended “bawling on a couch”). Too very different acts ;-). It’s even more ironic considering the character in question is from the future where genetic engineering has removed gender and everyone is basically the equivalent of Ken dolls. When my wife got to that part of the book, she just had to come upstairs to teach me there are two versions of that word.
I’m going all fan girl here. Hadrian or Royce from your Riyria books with you on a deserted island?
There is no contest, definitely Hadrian. Did I mention he was the more affable of the two? Royce would immediately leave, finding some out of the way place where he could live out his days in solitude. Picking him would pretty much be equivalent to being alone, but with the added danger that he would kill me if supplies were scarce.With Hadrian, we would talk, work together to build some kind of shelter, and basically make the best of a bad situation. He would divide rations fairly even though he could pummel me easily. I’d never have to worry about watching my back as he could be trusted at all times.
To learn more:Blogs: Riyria | Hollow World | The First EmpireContact: email | twitter | facebook | goodreads | redditOnline sites: Wikipedia | Amazon | B&N | ibookstore
I'm overjoyed to have Michael J. Sullivan here to discuss his books and teach us something about his remarkable journey from small press to self-published to traditional published, all with the same series of books. He's the author of the Riyria Revelations, the Riyria Chronicles, and Hollow World series as well as some short stories.
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I, and I’m sure many others, find it inspiring that you were first published with a small press, then moved to being self-published, and then got your tradition publishing deal, all with the same books, the Riyria Revelations. Can you share a little about that journey and to what do you attribute the success?
The full credit goes to my wife, who has been the architect of “the business side” of my writing. I think it illustrates a kind of persistent determination that is so important in publishing. Robin is the type of person that doesn’t let obstacle stop her. She’ll find a way to go over, dig under, or break through any wall in her path.
Decades earlier, I had tried and failed at the whole publishing game, and when I picked up the pen again it was only on the condition that I wouldn’t seek publication. But Robin was convinced that the books needed to get “out there,” so she took it upon herself to do exactly that. She sent out hundreds of query letters, persevered through the rejections, and eventually landed an agent. At the time, we thought we were on our way. A year later we still had no offers, so she moved her concentration from the big-six to the smaller independent companies. My first contract was with AMI, a small press out of Minnesota. When they fell on hard times, and couldn’t raise the money for the print run on the second book, she jumped into self-publishing. As the series neared its completion, and sales were starting to pick up, she thought it might be worth submitting to New York again, and she was right. Our agent sent the book to 17 publishers (all whom had seen the same project many years before and rejected it). Half of them expressed immediate interest, and Orbit made a really attractive pre-emptive bid…and the rest, as they say, is history.
What would you say was the hardest step along that journey? Getting your first break? Deciding to self-publish? Deciding to switch to tradition publishing? Getting an agent or something else?
Is “all of the above” too much of a copout? Seriously, though, the publishing business is rarely easy no matter which route you take. I compare publishing much like hiking in the Blue Ridge Mountains. You climb, struggling all the way, and just as you reach the crest, you look out to see row after row of other peaks extending out to the horizon. There is always a new challenge to overcome.
Having done the full gamut, I’d say that each path has its own challenges, and I wouldn’t classify one route has harder or easier than the other. I will say that getting that very first independent person who says “I like this,” is a monumental step. And it, more than any others, makes you think, “I just might be able to make this thing work, and I’m not totally delusional about my writing ability.”
One thing you would change of your writing journey, if you had a magic lamp/time machine?
Honestly, I wouldn’t change a thing about my publishing path. I think doing it the way I have has given me great perspective, which is especially important given all the flux in the publishing business right now. I’m more agile than most, because I’ve done it all and can pick and choose from a wide range of possibilities for each project. My latest novel (Hollow World – releasing in April) is a true hybrid. I sold the audio rights to one publisher, the print rights to another, but I’ve kept the ebook rights. For most authors, they just keep publishing in whatever way they started out with, and I think that they could benefit from a little more diversity.
On the writing end, I wouldn’t have taken my ten-year hiatus. At my writing pace, that could have meant another 20 – 25 books. As I get older, I realize that many of my stories will die with me, as I won’t have enough years left to write them all. At the time I quit, it seemed to make perfect sense; I had written twelve books over the course of a decade and got nowhere. To me it was all just a waste of time, but now I know it was actually laying the foundation for my second go at publishing.
You mention in the acknowledgements of The Crown Tower (recently released) giving up writing for ten years. What drove you to get back to the work of creating worlds and people?
Ha, I promise I didn’t peak ahead. It’s interesting this question follows on the heels of my regret about quitting. It was probably the confluence of a few things. · I had grown bored of the profession I had been doing (I ran my own advertising agency), and boredom has always been a catalyst for my creative endeavors.· My dyslexic daughter was having problems reading, and I wanted to give her a book to ignite a love of reading. The best way to do that was to write something myself.· Writing had always been my life’s goal, even when I was a child, and I had reached an age where if I didn’t start then, I would never do it.· For that decade when I was going “cold turkey,” the stories just kept coming to me, and they were piling up. I felt the best way to exorcise them out of my brain was to transfer the ideas to paper.
· The realization that writing and publishing don’t have to be married together. I could write books just for me, my daughter, my wife, and a few friends and the satisfaction would come from the doing…not any form of external validation.
Like George Lucas, you’ve taken your Riyria Revelations series and gone to prequels with The Crown Tower and The Rose and the Thorn . On the one hand you really know the characters well, but what is the hard part of writing prequels to a well-known series?
Well, unlike Lucas, it wasn’t planned that way. I had never intended to write any more about Royce and Hadrian other than the six books of The Riyria Revelations. But my readers, and more importantly my wife, were having major withdrawals, which made me think about writing more. Since the series was so carefully planned and executed I thought “tacking on” would be the wrong thing to do. So instead, I went to the other end of the timeline.
I think there were two difficulties. One is that there were pillars, foundations that can’t be messed with, so I’m more boxed in. The other is that my readers already know a lot, and so I have to push the envelope to grab and keep their interest. My approach was to expand on things only lightly mentioned in Revelations. Whenever I write, I employ the iceberg approach to both character and world building. Writing Chronicles allowed me to open my trunk and tell more about people and events, which only I knew about. Things like Gwen and Hildfred’s history and the circumstances that put Gwen in the right place at a very critical time.
You seem to be a people person. I see you on twitter and Goodreads. You’re very active in your own marketing and promotion. As someone who successfully self-published would you share some tips on what were your most successful promotional tools, besides writing captivating characters and engaging plotlines?
I attribute my early success to two main sources: Bloggers (who are amazingly hard working people that create works of love with little, or no, monetary reward) and Goodreads which is an amazing community of readers.
For bloggers, it’s important to treat them with the upmost respect. That means everything from doing your research before approaching them, providing them things to make their jobs easier (cover pictures, author bio, book blurbs, buy links, contact information), etc. Also you have to realize that they have a lot of people competing for their attention so you need to “pitch” your book in a way that really gets them excited. Don’t just jot of an email saying, “I wrote this book, do you want to read it?” Instead, create a “mini ad” that has a catchy headline, the book’s cover, some quotes from readers or other reviewers, and some compelling “back of the book” summarization. Again respect their time, so be short and sweet, but present your book professionally and you’ll have a better chance of being pushed to the top of their very high TBR pile.
For goodreads, and any venue where readers gather, it’s important to be a member of the community first and only bring up your books where appropriate and only if the rules allow. Some groups have designated folders for promotional activities; others forbid you mentioning your book at all. So know what you can or cannot do. If you violate the rules, the wrath will be swift and harsh. But if you participate in the discussion and are a “genuine” person, then people will take the initiative to checkout your books on their own. You don’t have to say, “buy my book” that never goes over well, but if you are engaging (and most importantly helpful) then you’ll get sales without ever saying those three words that put so many people off.
What’s the most important thing you can give a first-time reader to turn them into fans for life?
I think the first chapter of the first book of The Riyria Revelations (Theft of Swords) does a really good job at showing my style and voice. It actually reads like a self-contained short story about two guys who are being robbed in the middle of nowhere. Not only do they escape harm, but they also give the robbers pointers for future attempts. It shows the dynamic between Royce and Hadrian, and if people read that chapter and like it, it’s a pretty good bet they’ll like the rest of my writing.
Along the same lines, I also created a short story, The Viscount and the Witch which is free on all the major sites (for some reason I can’t get it free on B&N where it is $0.99, but I’ll always send free copies to people who email me). Like the start of Theft of Swords it is a short, easy to read introduction to my main characters and overall style of writing.
What do you find most fascinating about writing an epic series with multiply volumes like Riyria Revelations?
Without doubt it is the ability to weave threads and plant Easter eggs so that there are actually two stories for the reader. Each book has its own tale to tell, where there is a main conflict which is resolved fully, but there is also an over arching story and each book provides various clues, or red herrings that people can start to piece together.
Here’s an example. In the first book of Revelations, the main characters find themselves in a prison where a spell (experienced through constantly played music) dredges up a person’s worst memory, forcing them to relive it perpetually. For Hadrian, it’s killing a tiger while a crowd shouts “Gillanti.” Readers aren’t suppose to know what this means, but some will note it as important. Sure enough, several novels later (in the second book of Rise of Empire) they learn the whole story behind that memory and why it’s so painful.
Because I write the entire series before submitting them for publication (a technique I don’t recommend for new writers), I’m able to go back into earlier books and add threads when a really good idea comes up in later books.
This is something a lot of writers have heard over and over from agents: I just didn’t connect. There’s no question that your main characters are full-fleshed out. What do you think makes a main character relatable, and how do you add depth to them?
I cheat. Having a duo, rather than a single protagonist, helps me out immensely. Some will gravitate toward Royce, others Hadrian. I also get to show two sides of the same coin. Both characters wrestle with the regrets of their earlier lives, but their experiences produced different results.
For Hadrian, it makes him desire to be a hero rather than a parasitic thief for hire. He’s the more affable of the two, who is willing to lend a helping hand, as a way of paying pence for years of squandering his skills. Royce, on the other hand, was hardened by his tough upbringing. Distrustful, cynical, and much more concerned with self-preservation, he builds walls which isolate him from any chance of love or redemption. But both affect each other and while Royce is teaching Hadrian to stop being so naïve, Hadrian is earning Royce’s trust which gives him a way to break out of the prison of his own making. I think people want to be one or the other, or just have them as friends and share in their adventures.
For those that don’t have duos, my best advice is to write characters that you personally like and would enjoy spending time with. My books don’t follow the current trend in fantasy, of reprehensible characters in oppressive worlds. My characters may not win every fight, and there is death and heartbreak along the way, but I do have a dash of optimism that people enjoy when reading as a form of escapist entertainment.
There are dire words floating around about the market for fantasy. Agents proclaim no editor wants it, at least in YA. What are your predictions regarding the fantasy market?
I’ve never been “market driven” which probably explains why I failed in the early days. My mantra has been “write books I want to read,” and ultimately I’ve made that work for me. But it’s much easier to live by those words once you’ve “make it.”
I do think we have a lot of diversity right now, and there is still room for more. The truth is that no one knows what will sell, and traditional publishing has more failures than successes. The statistics I’ve seen is something like one book in five produces a profit and has to subsidize the other four that fail. You can’t really try to “time the market” as whatever you are writing now is years from release in the slow moving traditional system. To complicate matters, publishers operate with a “pack-like mentality.” There was a time with paranormal urban fantasy was hot, but once a certain sub-genre is deemed “oversaturated” they reject everything in that vein. In many ways they perpetuate the system.
The good news is there are now two sets of gatekeepers: traditional (that may lock out certain types at certain times) and self-publishing, where the readers will decide a book’s fate. So in many ways you have to “get it out there” and let the readers decide.
While you can rarely judge what will be hot, there is something that never goes out of style, and that is a good story well told. The will always be room for an engaging story with characters the readers become emotionally attached to.
I’m a firm admirer of using humor in stories. So many main characters are all with the drama and never with the quip. Your main characters never let go of their fun side. What made you decide to go in this direction with them?
I’ve made no secret that I write books that I want to read, and to me a book filled with dire people in even direr situations isn’t as entertaining as one that makes me smile or laugh. I think sometimes writers feel that adding humor brings their books down a peg, but I don’t think books that lack it are any more complex, realistic, or engaging. In fact, when it comes to realism, I think it hurts the story to omit it. We crack jokes in real life all the time, even when times are tough…or especially when they are tough. It’s a coping mechanism. As a writer we all want to touch a reader with our stories, and to me that means shedding a tear or laughing out loud. If I can do both on the same page it’s doubly sweet.
I was going to ask who your favorite character is, but that’s like asking which is your favorite child. So I’ll ask what genre is nearest your heart. You do write in a wide variety of them.
It’s funny because everyone thinks of me as a “fantasy writer” because that’s the first thing that got published, but I do write in just about every genre that exists. I wrote twelve novels during my first ten years when I was originally writing to publish. That includes: fantasy, science fiction, thrillers, mysteries, literary, coming of age, young adult, you name it. The only ones I’ve not dabbled in are romance, erotica, and westerns.
Fantasy is my first love, what got me interested in the written word. Prior to reading The Hobbit it was like pulling teeth to get me to finish a book. After it, I read extensively and writing became my favorite pastime. It will probably always have a sentimental spot in my heart because of that, but I do hope to be able to release books in a wide range of styles.
Do you rely on critique groups to go over your writing or did you hire an editor when you were starting out?
I think every author needs independent feedback. My first and most trusted source is Robin, who is great at finding plot holes, and has a really good eye for pacing and character motivation. She’s made immeasurable contributions to my work, long before anyone else sees it. I do also utilize beta testers and my critique group (shout out to the Arlington Writers Meetup). Beta testers read the full manuscript, of course, but my critique group generally only gets the first chapter. I also have a number of writer friends whose opinions I trust, and they are early readers as well.
As to editors, Avempartha was my first self-published book (actually book #2 of the series) and it had gone through the entire production cycle with AMI, so it was already professionally edited when the rights reverted. The same was true for Book #1 which eventually reverted once the print run sold out. Because both of those books were edited by AMI, we only needed to do a bit of proof reading. For book #3 (Nyphron Rising) and #4 (the Emerald Storm) we did hire freelance copy editors. Book #5 (Wintertide) was edited by Robin and a fulltime intern we had at the time, and Book #6 (Percepliquis) was edited by Orbit. Then, of course,the whole series was re-edited by Orbit once they bought it.
No interview with a writer would be complete without asking are you a pantser or plotter?
If people watched me write a book, they’d probably say plotter, because I start out with an outline and pretty much have the entire framework laid out before I sit down to start. That being said, I would actually answer that I’m both. There is no way for me to anticipate where the story will lead once actual writing begins. So I’m all for deviating from that original outline.
To me it’s like taking a trip. I know what highways I’ll take, what towns I’ll stop in for food or to sleep. But I might find a particularly interesting town and wind up staying a few days even though I had originally planned to just pass through. The side trip might even put me on the road to a different destination, but it is a “known” place. I don’t wander aimlessly, and so when I drive out of town I know where I’m now heading to.
Just for fun, silliest mistake you ever found in your own writing?
I’m famous for homophone errors, and sometimes I don’t even understand that a word that I’ve always used is actually spelled two different ways. This deficiency has made for some pretty embarrassing mistakes. The funniest of recent memory is from Hollow World. In it I have a character, who after seeing a brutal murder ended up “balling on a couch” rather than my intended “bawling on a couch”). Too very different acts ;-). It’s even more ironic considering the character in question is from the future where genetic engineering has removed gender and everyone is basically the equivalent of Ken dolls. When my wife got to that part of the book, she just had to come upstairs to teach me there are two versions of that word.
I’m going all fan girl here. Hadrian or Royce from your Riyria books with you on a deserted island?
There is no contest, definitely Hadrian. Did I mention he was the more affable of the two? Royce would immediately leave, finding some out of the way place where he could live out his days in solitude. Picking him would pretty much be equivalent to being alone, but with the added danger that he would kill me if supplies were scarce.With Hadrian, we would talk, work together to build some kind of shelter, and basically make the best of a bad situation. He would divide rations fairly even though he could pummel me easily. I’d never have to worry about watching my back as he could be trusted at all times.
To learn more:Blogs: Riyria | Hollow World | The First EmpireContact: email | twitter | facebook | goodreads | redditOnline sites: Wikipedia | Amazon | B&N | ibookstore
November 7, 2013
Fall Query Extravaganza 8
I'll be doing a limited number of query critiques this fall.
If you want your query showcased let me know on twitter. Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Dear Agent,
EMPIRE, NEVADA is the story of fifteen-year-old Paul Simpkins, a chubby teen with low self-esteem, whose world begins to unravel when the hometown he’s fiercely devoted to is closed by the mining company which owns and operates it.
Paul’s relationship with his parents is fractured because he believes his father, a lawyer who works for the company that owns Empire, should have done more to prevent the town’s closure. Without his close-knit group of friends to lean on, Paul begins to withdraw from the world around him.
When Paul moves to Reno with his family, he finds himself unable to cope with big-city life. Being friendless would be bad enough, but it gets even worse when Paul’s nemesis from Empire, Donnie Watson, ends up moving to Reno and attending the same school. The only solution Paul sees is to flee. He decides to get his friends from Empire and return home, but they find Empire a husk of what it once was. With no hope of making Empire his home again, Paul has to find a way to break out of his shell, or risk being a loner forever.
This story is partially based off of real events. Empire was a real town that was closed in 2011. It is a YA book that runs about 71,000 words and is somewhat similar in tone to Stephen King’s short story, ‘The Body.’
I am a middle school teacher that worked as both a bookseller and journalist. I have worked closely with editors before, and am very amenable to criticism and requests for edits/rewrites.
Thanks you for your time. I have included the first ten pages and look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
With my comments:
Dear Agent, Colon! Not comma.
EMPIRE, NEVADA is the story of fifteen-year-old Paul Simpkins, a chubby teen with low self-esteem, whose world begins to unravel when the hometown he’s fiercely devoted to is closed by the mining company which owns and operates it. A bit of in-your-face telling here. Consider the difference: Fifteen-year-old Paul can handle being overweight and unable to look people in the eye, but his world unravels when the mining company closes and takes his hometown with it. Never heard of a company actually owning a town before. Interesting. Is Empire the name of the town and/or the company?
Paul’s relationship with his parents is fractured because he believes his father, a lawyer who works for the company that owns Empire, should have done more to prevent the town’s closure. Paul blames his father, an employee of the mine. Without his close-knit group of friends to lean on (You need to explain why they aren't around.) When his friends are forced to move so their parent can find jobs, Paul begins to withdraws from the world around him. (Like Yoda says, there is no 'begins,' there is only do or don't do.)
When Paul moves to Reno with his family (Oops, looks like it is the other way around. Get in that he moves above instead.), he finds himself unable to cope with big-city life. Being friendless would be is bad enough, but it gets even worse when then Paul’s nemesis from Empire, Donnie Watson, ends up moving to Reno and attending the same school. The only solution Paul sees is to flee. He decides to gets his friends from Empire and returns home, but they find Empire a husk of what it once was. understood With no hope of making Empire his home again, Paul has to find a way to break out of his shell, or risk being a loner forever. I'd like a little more about the threat the bully poses and his father here in the stakes.
This story is partially based off of real events. Empire was a real town that was closed in 2011. Not sure if you can keep the name the same if it is a real place. A question for the historical fiction writers. It is a YA book that runs about 71,000 words and is somewhat similar in tone to Stephen King’s short story, ‘The Body.’ EMPIRE, NEVADA is a YA historical fiction complete at 71,000 words and is similar in tone to Stephen King's short story, THE BODY.
I am a middle school teacher that worked as both a bookseller and journalist. I have worked closely with editors before, and am very amenable to criticism and requests for edits/rewrites. I'd probably cut the last part of this sentence and instead add where you worked with editors. What newspaper?
Thanks you for your time. I have included the first ten pages and look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely, Could be cut.
A little bit of rephrasing to make this more active and I think this will be great. Also don't forget to decide on a genre and include it in your query.
If you want your query showcased let me know on twitter. Participants must comment on as many queries as they can to pay it forward. All query critiques are subjective. And rabbits don't come out of my hat, but I'll do my best. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Buy one and I'll throw in a set of free steak knives, just pay separate shipping and handling fees.
As sent to me:
Dear Agent,
EMPIRE, NEVADA is the story of fifteen-year-old Paul Simpkins, a chubby teen with low self-esteem, whose world begins to unravel when the hometown he’s fiercely devoted to is closed by the mining company which owns and operates it.
Paul’s relationship with his parents is fractured because he believes his father, a lawyer who works for the company that owns Empire, should have done more to prevent the town’s closure. Without his close-knit group of friends to lean on, Paul begins to withdraw from the world around him.
When Paul moves to Reno with his family, he finds himself unable to cope with big-city life. Being friendless would be bad enough, but it gets even worse when Paul’s nemesis from Empire, Donnie Watson, ends up moving to Reno and attending the same school. The only solution Paul sees is to flee. He decides to get his friends from Empire and return home, but they find Empire a husk of what it once was. With no hope of making Empire his home again, Paul has to find a way to break out of his shell, or risk being a loner forever.
This story is partially based off of real events. Empire was a real town that was closed in 2011. It is a YA book that runs about 71,000 words and is somewhat similar in tone to Stephen King’s short story, ‘The Body.’
I am a middle school teacher that worked as both a bookseller and journalist. I have worked closely with editors before, and am very amenable to criticism and requests for edits/rewrites.
Thanks you for your time. I have included the first ten pages and look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
With my comments:
Dear Agent, Colon! Not comma.
EMPIRE, NEVADA is the story of fifteen-year-old Paul Simpkins, a chubby teen with low self-esteem, whose world begins to unravel when the hometown he’s fiercely devoted to is closed by the mining company which owns and operates it. A bit of in-your-face telling here. Consider the difference: Fifteen-year-old Paul can handle being overweight and unable to look people in the eye, but his world unravels when the mining company closes and takes his hometown with it. Never heard of a company actually owning a town before. Interesting. Is Empire the name of the town and/or the company?
Paul’s relationship with his parents is fractured because he believes his father, a lawyer who works for the company that owns Empire, should have done more to prevent the town’s closure. Paul blames his father, an employee of the mine. Without his close-knit group of friends to lean on (You need to explain why they aren't around.) When his friends are forced to move so their parent can find jobs, Paul begins to withdraws from the world around him. (Like Yoda says, there is no 'begins,' there is only do or don't do.)
When Paul moves to Reno with his family (Oops, looks like it is the other way around. Get in that he moves above instead.), he finds himself unable to cope with big-city life. Being friendless would be is bad enough, but it gets even worse when then Paul’s nemesis from Empire, Donnie Watson, ends up moving to Reno and attending the same school. The only solution Paul sees is to flee. He decides to gets his friends from Empire and returns home, but they find Empire a husk of what it once was. understood With no hope of making Empire his home again, Paul has to find a way to break out of his shell, or risk being a loner forever. I'd like a little more about the threat the bully poses and his father here in the stakes.
This story is partially based off of real events. Empire was a real town that was closed in 2011. Not sure if you can keep the name the same if it is a real place. A question for the historical fiction writers. It is a YA book that runs about 71,000 words and is somewhat similar in tone to Stephen King’s short story, ‘The Body.’ EMPIRE, NEVADA is a YA historical fiction complete at 71,000 words and is similar in tone to Stephen King's short story, THE BODY.
I am a middle school teacher that worked as both a bookseller and journalist. I have worked closely with editors before, and am very amenable to criticism and requests for edits/rewrites. I'd probably cut the last part of this sentence and instead add where you worked with editors. What newspaper?
Thanks you for your time. I have included the first ten pages and look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely, Could be cut.
A little bit of rephrasing to make this more active and I think this will be great. Also don't forget to decide on a genre and include it in your query.
