Chris Maley's Blog, page 14

2020. Covid-19 killed almost 350,000 Americans. But the stock market did great!

My country is evil. This past year proved it. Remember this anti-masking incident? Ahh, memory lane. Everything—from the t-shirt to the perturbedness to the fact that the dude lived in Florida—seemed so perfectly…American. In that ’80s T&A flick Porky’s kind of way. The American Right’s passive-aggressiveness is nothing new. They’ve been in a snit for […]

American Right-wingers seem to have gotten their armbands in a twist.

Do authoritarians want civil war…or do they want to dial 911? “When it gets down to having to use violence, then you are playing the system’s game. The establishment will irritate you – pull your beard, flick your face – to make you fight. Because once they’ve got you violent, then they know how to […]

The Petting Zoo Bourgeoisie went to the polls.

Over 70 million Americans voted to re-elect Donald Trump. The MAGA-hatted aren’t as destitute as they pretend to be. Hey world, it’s me again. It’s the author of Fearkiller and The Revolutionizer Stories, those books you’ve never heard of. I am just shooting the rest of Planet Earth a quick hello from Denver, Colorado. You […]

Hey, he made the crazy-trains run on time.

The more Donald Trump and #MAGA refuse to admit that he lost the 2020 Election, the more insane they look. I used to wonder what it would be like to live in an America where the president happens to be a combination of Benito Mussolini, the FyreFestival guy, and Charles Manson. Now I know. It’s […]

Silly people! Those bros aren’t sociopaths. They’re just carefree.

The rich white bros and the bros who fetishize the rich white bros want the masses to die for the stock market. Lookit LBJ go. Sixty-odd years ago, the 36th President of the United States slung some truth about a mentality that still thrives today. Little did Lyndon know back then: even during a pandemic, […]

Hitlerian hilarity: the years 2016 to 2020.

Donald Trump and his gang of spiteful, stink-eyed MAGAs do nazi why all votes should be counted. C’mon, election workers…count those votes! Donald is weird, ain’t he? Trashing the electoral system the way that he does. Hitlerian hilarity is Don’s thing. Hitlerian hilarity—take the fact that Don has the authority to launch the nukes: He’s […]

Anti-Semitic Tightwads.

Neo-Nazi whiteboys pinch pennies more than the worst of their Jewish stereotypes. This is not a long post, but it riffs off of my series, Bros: America’s new Jews. II. III. IV. V. I’m writing this as America still counts the votes after the 2020 Election. And the bolshevik-esque chickenhawks of the American kakistocracy, the […]

S.A.L.A.F.A.: Second Amendment Lovers Against the First Amendment.

My country has a gun-loving, billionaire-fetishizing, white-skinned, chickenhawk, terrorist problem. Vote #MAGA out. This post isn’t going to be long, but before I begin, I need to say: PLEASE VOTE. PLLLLLLLLEEEEEEAAAASSSSEEEE. Thank you for listening to my TED Talk. The chart above is seriously fucked up, isn’t it? America contains 5% of the world’s population […]

#fakecivilwar

Attention, world: my country has issues. Issues that have been ignored for too long. Hey there, world. You know those people from my country who travel to your country and visit the nearest McDonald’s and order Big Macs and then rant about how the Big Macs don’t taste as good in your country as the […]

Micro-aggression gone masculine.

Bootlicking chickenhawks are itchin’ to dial 911…oops, excuse me…to start a “civil war.” You know those fellas who refer to themselves as “alpha males”? Guess what? They’re not alpha males.  The self-described sheepdogs are full of sheepdogshit when they boast about what sheepdogs they are.  Then there’s the non-military guys who sprinkle their vocabulary with military […]