Dave Barry's Blog, page 199

LEAVE IT TO PROFESSIONALS

Doctors Really Don't Want You Shaving Your Butt

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

TOTALLY PROPORTIONAL

Woman attempts to set Tiberias city hall on fire over parking ticket

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

WE'VE BEEN SERVED MEATBALLS THAT OLD

Meatball from long-extinct mammoth created by food firm

(Thanks to Barry Nester, Jay Brandes, Doug Ogg, Ralph, Nelson from Michigan and Stan)

HOW BIG IS THAT IN GIRAFFES?

A ���bum splitting��� Viking poo measuring 20cm long and 5cm wide remains the largest turd on record.

(Thanks to Annette, Jerome Stemnock and Ralph)

THIS JUST IN

Japanese Penis Festival shrine distances itself from penis mascot

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker and Ralph)

Another version: Japanese penis festival says fake phallic mascot is making things really hard

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

IN THAT CASE, SIR...

Florida Man Arrested For Going 100 MPH, Claims He Needed To Go To Taco Bell

(Thanks to Ralph)

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hello, I���m working on a mental health and wellness campaign

'SO HOW WAS YOUR COMMUTE?'

Dramatic moment Kia Soul is launched 10 feet into the air after a loose wheel plows into it on LA freeway

(Thanks to Al Barkafski, who says "Kia Soul is the first flying car!")

FINALLY

MR ROGERS��� ���WON���T YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR?��� TO THE TUNE OF ���HOUSE OF THE RISING SUN���

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

FOR POSTERITY, DUDE

This Bay Area startup is preserving the world���s best pot strains

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)