Sara Horn's Blog, page 4

Believing in God’s Good When You’re Walking Through the Bad

Just a few months after I’d turned my manuscript in to my editor for How Can I Possibly Forgive, I found myself in the middle of a tough situation. It was a hurtful situation where the circumstances went beyond just a simple mistake. I had nothing to do with the decisions or the outcome, but I was still impacted by the actions of someone else.

I realized I was facing a choice: I could forgive, or not forgive.

Immediately, God brought the scripture to mind that I’ve declared as the verse for my life: “We know that all things work together  for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28).

It was hard to  understand why something so unfair had occurred, but as I thought about those words in Romans, I noticed that instead of immediately thinking about the wrong that had happened – what I could have taken as very personal in those moments – God helped me see through different eyes.

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God helped me see through different eyes.Tweet This

I realized I was thinking more about the sin that had happened against God than this being about me, and in that moment, I saw this situation was a whole lot more about this other person  and their relationship with the Lord.

Choosing to Forgive

So I made the choice. I forgave what had been done, I trusted that out of something bad, God could in fact do something good, and through that process, I ultimately got to see someone close to me enter into a new relationship with God.

I’ve thought about that moment a lot, and I don’t share it with you to say, “Wow, look at me and how I was able to forgive.” Because I know it wasn’t me. If it had been me, I probably would not have forgiven. I might have ended that relationship, that friendship, immediately. But God was doing a work in my heart way before that opportunity for forgiveness ever happened and right when I (and probably that other person) needed it, the Holy Spirit was there, guiding my heart.

Over and over God showed me how many times He’s forgiven me. He’d consistently reinforced to me that He was my foundation, and the one I lean on for strength. So when news came that could have knocked me down, I didn’t completely lose my footing because I wasn’t standing on shaky ground – the ground I was standing on was rock hard because long before that difficult news, I’d realized God was my foundation – and no one and nothing else could match what He brought me.

Because He forgave me, I could forgive this person. Because I’d spent time studying His Word, I knew God was bigger than the big mess in front of me. Because of God’s love for me, I knew I could still continue to show love towards this person, even in the midst of the wrong that had been done.

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I trusted that out of something bad, God could in fact do something good.Tweet This

Situations that come up requiring forgiveness aren’t always easy, simple or pain-free. But you can walk through them with less difficulty when you’re already walking with God.

How’s your relationship with Him today? Does He feel close to you? Or far away? Are you reading His Word daily? Or do you only pick it up in times of desperate need? The latter is okay to do, better to do it then, than never at all – but you’ll react much better in times of crisis if you’re connecting with Him consistently.

The more you do, the more you’ll see His good. And the more you see His good, the easier you’ll believe that His good will prevail.

Even when you’re walking through the bad.

I’m traveling this week (Oct. 8-Oct. 15) – if you’re near Fayetteville, NC  or Newport News, VA,  I’ll be in your area soon! Click here for the details. I’d love to meet you!

 

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How to Stay More Motivated When You Don’t Want To

When I was a kid, we spent a lot of time running around at recess playing some form or version of tag. Remember that game? When you were tagged by your friend, it was your turn to tag someone else. You didn’t get to stay in one spot, picking out who you wanted to be “it” and tagging them when you felt like it – no, you started hustling as fast as you could go until you touched the next lucky person. You moved and you kept moving until you no longer had to… at least you didn’t have to move as fast when someone else had to do the tagging – you just had to be better at dodging.

Today, we don’t think of tagging the same way. Today you can be tagged in a photo or a status on FB and not be required to do anything. You’re included but you’re not necessarily expected to do. You’ve been made aware  – of something beautiful, of something funny, something cute, but you haven’t  been asked to be the next one to run.

These days, we’ve become more observer than doer, more thinker than active, more spectator than participant.

But is this really what God’s called us to?

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Is this really what God’s called us to? Tweet This

When God calls us, He “tags” us. When He marks us with His Son’s blood that spilled for us on the Cross, when He looks down, reaches out to us, and says “you’re mine, you were bought with a price”, does that stipulation include us just sitting?

I don’t think it does.

When we know Christ, we know freedom. That’s something that has to be shared. That’s what must be told. It’s our very best gift we can pass on to someone else – not the kind that’s put in a closet and pulled out only on special occasions.

Paul reminds us in Philippians 3…

“Not that I have already reached the goal or am already fully mature, but I make every effort to take hold of it because I also have been taken hold of by Christ Jesus. Brothers, I do not consider myself to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgeting what is behind and reaching forward to what is ahead, I pursue as my goal the prize promised by God’s heavenly call in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 3:12-14

He says earlier in that chapter that his goal is to know Christ and to know Him well, to focus on understanding the power of His death on the cross and His resurrection.

That should be our goal as well.

Are you running? Or are you just standing? Are you moving? Or are you sitting still?

What if you’ve been tagged and you don’t even know it? You don’t realize it? Or maybe you do know it, but you ignore it? You refuse to run because of fear, or doubt or a belief that someone else would be way better? Way more qualified? Way more organized?

God doesn’t ask for your perfection. He asks for you to take action.

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God doesn’t ask for your perfection. He asks for you to take action. Tweet This

He doesn’t want your excuses. He wants you to make the right choices.

I’ve known many, many women who have felt that nudge from God to do something… only to talk themselves out of it, to refuse to believe it, and they miss not only the blessing God had for them, but also the trust-building.

Getting tagged isn’t just about being touched for a special purpose; it’s about what you do after you’ve been tagged – and how you touch others. Will you encourage someone today? Will you challenge someone? Will you let someone else know they’re not alone?

You’re not just tagged for God’s purposes for you. You’re tagged to be used in God’s purpose for others.

So guess what?

You’re tagged.

Now run. And tag someone else. 

“The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” ~ Proverbs 16:9

What has God tagged you to do? What is He asking you to move for? Share with me in the comments – I’d love to hear from you!

 

STOREWIDE SALE

The post How to Stay More Motivated When You Don’t Want To appeared first on Sara Horn.

What if You’re “It”?

When I was a kid, we spent a lot of time running around at recess playing some form or version of tag. Remember that game? When you were tagged by your friend, it was your turn to tag someone else. You didn’t get to stay in one spot, picking out who you wanted to be “it” and tagging them when you felt like it – no, you started hustling as fast as you could go until you touched the next lucky person. You moved and you kept moving until you no longer had to… at least you didn’t have to move as fast when someone else had to do the tagging – you just had to be better at dodging.

Today, we don’t think of tagging the same way. Today you can be tagged in a photo or a status on FB and not be required to do anything. You’re included but you’re not necessarily expected to do. You’ve been made aware  – of something beautiful, of something funny, something cute, but you haven’t  been asked to be the next one to run.

These days, we’ve become more observer than doer, more thinker than active, more spectator than participant.

But is this really what God’s called us to?

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Is this really what God’s called us to? Tweet This

When God calls us, He “tags” us. When He marks us with His Son’s blood that spilled for us on the Cross, when He looks down, reaches out to us, and says “you’re mine, you were bought with a price”, does that stipulation include us just sitting?

I don’t think it does.

When we know Christ, we know freedom. That’s something that has to be shared. That’s what must be told. It’s our very best gift we can pass on to someone else – not the kind that’s put in a closet and pulled out only on special occasions.

Paul reminds us in Philippians 3…

“Not that I have already reached the goal or am already fully mature, but I make every effort to take hold of it because I also have been taken hold of by Christ Jesus. Brothers, I do not consider myself to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgeting what is behind and reaching forward to what is ahead, I pursue as my goal the prize promised by God’s heavenly call in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 3:12-14

He says earlier in that chapter that his goal is to know Christ and to know Him well, to focus on understanding the power of His death on the cross and His resurrection.

That should be our goal as well.

Are you running? Or are you just standing? Are you moving? Or are you sitting still?

What if you’ve been tagged and you don’t even know it? You don’t realize it? Or maybe you do know it, but you ignore it? You refuse to run because of fear, or doubt or a belief that someone else would be way better? Way more qualified? Way more organized?

God doesn’t ask for your perfection. He asks for you to take action.

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God doesn’t ask for your perfection. He asks for you to take action. Tweet This

He doesn’t want your excuses. He wants you to make the right choices.

I’ve known many, many women who have felt that nudge from God to do something… only to talk themselves out of it, to refuse to believe it, and they miss not only the blessing God had for them, but also the trust-building.

Getting tagged isn’t just about being touched for a special purpose; it’s about what you do after you’ve been tagged – and how you touch others. Will you encourage someone today? Will you challenge someone? Will you let someone else know they’re not alone?

You’re not just tagged for God’s purposes for you. You’re tagged to be used in God’s purpose for others.

So guess what?

You’re tagged.

Now run. And tag someone else. 

“The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” ~ Proverbs 16:9

What has God tagged you to do? What is He asking you to move for? Share with me in the comments – I’d love to hear from you!

 

STOREWIDE SALE

How to Stop the Small Stuff from Hurting Big Time

When you think about someone forgiving someone else… what comes to mind?

Is it the Big Stuff? What seems to be the Unforgiveable?

The woman who chooses to forgive the drunk driver who killed her son who was in the car he hit head on?
The man who can still remember the beatings his father gave him when he was just a little boy, who is now taking care of that same man with tenderness never shown to him?
The newlywed who is madly in love with her new husband but struggles with being intimate because she still has nightmares about the sexual abuse she experienced at the hand of a close “family friend” when she was a pre-teen?
The wife who has a choice to make: does she forgive her husband who has just told her he cheated on her – or does she tell him to leave?

Those things certainly fall in the category of the “Big Stuff” we think about when we think about forgiveness. Those things are HARD. Those things are HUGE. Life-changing. Life-shattering. We see how needed forgiveness is in that person’s life to move on, to move past, to experience better days than before. We also imagine how tough and painful that can be to do.

We don’t always feel the same way about the Little Stuff.

What do we hear others say, and sometimes even say ourselves…?

“Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

“Don’t worry about the little things.”

“Just let it go.”

“Just get over it.”

“Don’t make a big deal out of nothing.”

Small Stuff Still Hurts

Here’s what I’ve learned about Small Stuff, though. Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it. Because how you learn to handle the Small Stuff is what helps prepare you for the Big Stuff – the Big Hurts – the hurts you don’t always see coming.

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Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it.Tweet This

I remember when our son was little and one Saturday morning, he came to us with a splinter in his finger. Being 5 or 6 years old, he didn’t really know the name for it, but he knew one thing – his finger hurt!

As we peered down intently at his hand, squinting to see the tiny little black shard sticking out of his finger tip, we flipped on one light and then another, straining to see what we knew must be there but couldn’t really make out. But it was obvious to Caleb that something was there. And he didn’t like it.

He didn’t like it any better, though, when we had him lay down on our bed and one of us grabbed the tweezers.

That’s when the screaming started. Blood-curdling, at the top of his lungs, hollerin’ that didn’t quit!

If you’d just gone by the noise he was making, you would have thought someone was MURDERING him – not sitting at his side with a pair of tweezers 3 inches from his finger and looking at him wondering if his finger would or wouldn’t fall off if we just left the splinter in there (since we couldn’t get him to sit still long enough for us to get closer!).

I still, eight years later, have no idea what our neighbors must have thought – since we discovered afterwards that ALL of our windows in our bedroom were OPEN.

Awesome.

Absolutely awesome.

Still not sure why Child Protective Services didn’t show up at our door. Maybe our neighbors had also attempted splinter removal on their kids.

Eventually, somehow, by some miracle of God, after tag-teaming like wrestlers in a cage fight, one of us got that stupid splinter out. And as suddenly as our son’s screaming had started, it stopped.

In mid-scream, his mouth still wide open, the sound stopped as soon as the pain did.

I still can see his instant reaction once that splinter was no longer poking him. With tears still lingering in the corners of his eyes, he popped up from that bed with the biggest smile on his face, said “Thanks, Mom!” and hugged me as he ran out the door to go play with his toys. He was free. He was pain-free.

Small Stuff hurts. Don’t try talking yourself into believing that it doesn’t. Those hurtful slights from co-workers. A friend’s obvious lies. Gossip that you’re the center of. A text message accusing you of something you didn’t do. Facebook photos of a party you weren’t invited to… but apparently everyone else was.

3 Ways to Forgive Or Move Past the Small Stuff

So how do we forgive the small stuff? How do we let go of those painful shards when they’re not always easy to see, but they get under our skin anyway?

Give more than you get.

The small slights aren’t nearly as noticeable when we’re focused on doing more for others than whether others are doing more for us.

Focus on your strengths.

Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least. Our confidence wanes. Our insecurities grow. Our armor starts to crack. Little flaming insult-carrying arrows have a greater chance of hitting where it’s soft. Be secure in Christ. Recognize the gifts and talents He’s given you. Recognize the blessings you already have.

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Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least.Tweet This

Offer the benefit of the doubt.

Have you noticed how easy it is to jump to conclusions? Someone ignores us and we think they must hate us. But sometimes what we perceive as a direct attack may be nothing more than someone else distracted. So offer more grace and less grumbling. Smile more than you frown.

And whatever you do… try to avoid those splinters.

 

 

The post How to Stop the Small Stuff from Hurting Big Time appeared first on Sara Horn.

Forgiving the Small Stuff

When you think about someone forgiving someone else… what comes to mind?

Is it the Big Stuff? What seems to be the Unforgiveable?

The woman who chooses to forgive the drunk driver who killed her son who was in the car he hit head on?
The man who can still remember the beatings his father gave him when he was just a little boy, who is now taking care of that same man with tenderness never shown to him?
The newlywed who is madly in love with her new husband but struggles with being intimate because she still has nightmares about the sexual abuse she experienced at the hand of a close “family friend” when she was a pre-teen?
The wife who has a choice to make: does she forgive her husband who has just told her he cheated on her – or does she tell him to leave?

Those things certainly fall in the category of the “Big Stuff” we think about when we think about forgiveness. Those things are HARD. Those things are HUGE. Life-changing. Life-shattering. We see how needed forgiveness is in that person’s life to move on, to move past, to experience better days than before. We also imagine how tough and painful that can be to do.

We don’t always feel the same way about the Little Stuff.

What do we hear others say, and sometimes even say ourselves…?

“Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

“Don’t worry about the little things.”

“Just let it go.”

“Just get over it.”

“Don’t make a big deal out of nothing.”

Small Stuff Still Hurts

Here’s what I’ve learned about Small Stuff, though. Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it. Because how you learn to handle the Small Stuff is what helps prepare you for the Big Stuff – the Big Hurts – the hurts you don’t always see coming.

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Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it.Tweet This

I remember when our son was little and one Saturday morning, he came to us with a splinter in his finger. Being 5 or 6 years old, he didn’t really know the name for it, but he knew one thing – his finger hurt!

As we peered down intently at his hand, squinting to see the tiny little black shard sticking out of his finger tip, we flipped on one light and then another, straining to see what we knew must be there but couldn’t really make out. But it was obvious to Caleb that something was there. And he didn’t like it.

He didn’t like it any better, though, when we had him lay down on our bed and one of us grabbed the tweezers.

That’s when the screaming started. Blood-curdling, at the top of his lungs, hollerin’ that didn’t quit!

If you’d just gone by the noise he was making, you would have thought someone was MURDERING him – not sitting at his side with a pair of tweezers 3 inches from his finger and looking at him wondering if his finger would or wouldn’t fall off if we just left the splinter in there (since we couldn’t get him to sit still long enough for us to get closer!).

I still, eight years later, have no idea what our neighbors must have thought – since we discovered afterwards that ALL of our windows in our bedroom were OPEN.

Awesome.

Absolutely awesome.

Still not sure why Child Protective Services didn’t show up at our door. Maybe our neighbors had also attempted splinter removal on their kids.

Eventually, somehow, by some miracle of God, after tag-teaming like wrestlers in a cage fight, one of us got that stupid splinter out. And as suddenly as our son’s screaming had started, it stopped.

In mid-scream, his mouth still wide open, the sound stopped as soon as the pain did.

I still can see his instant reaction once that splinter was no longer poking him. With tears still lingering in the corners of his eyes, he popped up from that bed with the biggest smile on his face, said “Thanks, Mom!” and hugged me as he ran out the door to go play with his toys. He was free. He was pain-free.

Small Stuff hurts. Don’t try talking yourself into believing that it doesn’t. Those hurtful slights from co-workers. A friend’s obvious lies. Gossip that you’re the center of. A text message accusing you of something you didn’t do. Facebook photos of a party you weren’t invited to… but apparently everyone else was.

3 Ways to Forgive Or Move Past the Small Stuff

So how do we forgive the small stuff? How do we let go of those painful shards when they’re not always easy to see, but they get under our skin anyway?

Give more than you get.

The small slights aren’t nearly as noticeable when we’re focused on doing more for others than whether others are doing more for us.

Focus on your strengths.

Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least. Our confidence wanes. Our insecurities grow. Our armor starts to crack. Little flaming insult-carrying arrows have a greater chance of hitting where it’s soft. Be secure in Christ. Recognize the gifts and talents He’s given you. Recognize the blessings you already have.

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Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least.Tweet This

Offer the benefit of the doubt.

Have you noticed how easy it is to jump to conclusions? Someone ignores us and we think they must hate us. But sometimes what we perceive as a direct attack may be nothing more than someone else distracted. So offer more grace and less grumbling. Smile more than you frown.

And whatever you do… try to avoid those splinters.

 

 

The post Forgiving the Small Stuff appeared first on Sara Horn.

Do You Know How to Forgive the Small Stuff?

When you think about someone forgiving someone else… what comes to mind?

Is it the Big Stuff? What seems to be the Unforgiveable?

The woman who chooses to forgive the drunk driver who killed her son who was in the car he hit head on?
The man who can still remember the beatings his father gave him when he was just a little boy, who is now taking care of that same man with tenderness never shown to him?
The newlywed who is madly in love with her new husband but struggles with being intimate because she still has nightmares about the sexual abuse she experienced at the hand of a close “family friend” when she was a pre-teen?
The wife who has a choice to make: does she forgive her husband who has just told her he cheated on her – or does she tell him to leave?

 

Those things certainly fall in the category of the “Big Stuff” we think about when we think about forgiveness. Those things are HARD. Those things are HUGE. Life-changing. Life-shattering. We see how needed forgiveness is in that person’s life to move on, to move past, to experience better days than before. We also imagine how tough and painful that can be to do.

We don’t always feel the same way about the Little Stuff.

What do we hear others say, and sometimes even say ourselves…?

“Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

“Don’t worry about the little things.”

“Just let it go.”

“Just get over it.”

“Don’t make a big deal out of nothing.”

Small Stuff Still Hurts

Here’s what I’ve learned about Small Stuff, though. Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it. Because how you learn to handle the Small Stuff is what helps prepare you for the Big Stuff – the Big Hurts – the hurts you don’t always see coming.

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Small Stuff does hurt. And Small Stuff gets bigger when we don’t deal with it.Tweet This

I remember when our son was little and one Saturday morning, he came to us with a splinter in his finger. Being 5 or 6 years old, he didn’t really know the name for it, but he knew one thing – his finger hurt!

As we peered down intently at his hand, squinting to see the tiny little black shard sticking out of his finger tip, we flipped on one light and then another, straining to see what we knew must be there but couldn’t really make out. But it was obvious to Caleb that something was there. And he didn’t like it.

He didn’t like it any better, though, when we had him lay down on our bed and one of us grabbed the tweezers.

That’s when the screaming started. Blood-curdling, at the top of his lungs, hollerin’ that didn’t quit!

If you’d just gone by the noise he was making, you would have thought someone was MURDERING him – not sitting at his side with a pair of tweezers 3 inches from his finger and looking at him wondering if his finger would or wouldn’t fall off if we just left the splinter in there (since we couldn’t get him to sit still long enough for us to get closer!).

I still, eight years later, have no idea what our neighbors must have thought – since we discovered afterwards that ALL of our windows in our bedroom were OPEN.

Awesome.

Absolutely awesome.

Still not sure why Child Protective Services didn’t show up at our door. Maybe our neighbors had also attempted splinter removal on their kids.

Eventually, somehow, by some miracle of God, after tag-teaming like wrestlers in a cage fight, one of us got that stupid splinter out. And as suddenly as our son’s screaming had started, it stopped.

In mid-scream, his mouth still wide open, the sound stopped as soon as the pain did.

I still can see his instant reaction once that splinter was no longer poking him. With tears still lingering in the corners of his eyes, he popped up from that bed with the biggest smile on his face, said “Thanks, Mom!” and hugged me as he ran out the door to go play with his toys. He was free. He was pain-free.

Small Stuff hurts. Don’t try talking yourself into believing that it doesn’t. Those hurtful slights from co-workers. A friend’s obvious lies. Gossip that you’re the center of. A text message accusing you of something you didn’t do. Facebook photos of a party you weren’t invited to… but apparently everyone else was.

3 Ways to Forgive Or Move Past the Small Stuff

So how do we forgive the small stuff? How do we let go of those painful shards when they’re not always easy to see, but they get under our skin anyway?

Give more than you get.

The small slights aren’t nearly as noticeable when we’re focused on doing more for others than whether others are doing more for us.

Focus on your strengths.

Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least. Our confidence wanes. Our insecurities grow. Our armor starts to crack. Little flaming insult-carrying arrows have a greater chance of hitting where it’s soft. Be secure in Christ. Recognize the gifts and talents He’s given you. Recognize the blessings you already have.

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Small stuff hurts the most when we think of ourselves the least.Tweet This

Offer the benefit of the doubt.

Have you noticed how easy it is to jump to conclusions? Someone ignores us and we think they must hate us. But sometimes what we perceive as a direct attack may be nothing more than someone else distracted. So offer more grace and less grumbling. Smile more than you frown.

And whatever you do… try to avoid those splinters.

 

Live near Gulfport, MS? I’ll be at the LifeWay Christian Store in Gulfport, Saturday, Oct. 4 from 1 to 3 to sign copies of my new book,  How Can I Possibly Forgive? I’d love to see you! Click here for more information.

Mad at God? 5 Ways to Overcome Your Anger

The following is an edited excerpt from my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret.

We sat in the quiet of the church sanctuary, two chairs pulled together, our knees almost touching, listening to the faint laughter and conversation in the hall behind us as women lined up during the lunch break. Just a little while before, as I was speaking to the group, I saw her tears fall and thought she might need some more time just to talk. Just to be. Just to say out loud whatever was bothering her. Sometimes as a wife and a mom, you don’t always get that opportunity.

She started telling me about her kids. Her son was nine with muscular dystrophy. He was starting to have enough difficulty walking that they knew he probably needed to start using a wheelchair soon. Her daughter, a little younger, had autism. This young mom sat in front of me, looking helpless and tired and worn down and much older than her actual age. As her tears fell and she wiped her nose with a tissue, she assured me over and over how much she loved her kids. But then she took a breath and looked at me, ready to unload what I’m sure was on her heart during that morning’s session.

“I love my kids. But I’m not sure if I love God anymore,” she said. “I don’t understand how he could allow these things to happen to my kids. They’re kids. They’re innocent. Neither one of them will ever have the chance to just be normal. My son may not even grow up to be an adult.” She paused. “What did they do to deserve these lives they’ve been given?” Her lip trembled.

“I’m so mad at him,” she said. “I stopped praying a long time ago, because he didn’t seem to answer anything I asked. Why would God do this? Why would he do this to children? Why would he do this to my husband and me?”

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Why would God do this? Why would he do this to children? Tweet This

Things happen in our lives, hurts and disappointments and tragedies we can’t explain and don’t understand. If you’re not a Christian and you don’t have that relationship with Christ, you might be prone to say God is out to get you. But if you are a Christian and you do know Christ and his love and you strive to follow him and live for him, you may not want to say God is out to get you out loud, but you secretly may still wonder deep down if he is—or at least you question what he’s thinking….

 

5 Ways to Deal With Your Anger Towards God

1. Realize you have a choice.
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Sometimes when we say we’re angry with God, we’re really afraid he can’t do anything about our hurts.Tweet This

No one makes you angry with God. You choose that feeling, and when you allow resentment to separate you from God, to build up a wall of your own making, you choose a form of bitterness over his love. Don’t be bitter. Don’t throw away the goodness of God in your life. Sometimes when we say we’re angry with God, we’re really just afraid he can’t do anything about our hurts. Choose to give your pain to God.

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will no longer exist; grief, crying, and pain will exist no longer, because the previous things have passed away. (Revelation 21:4)

 

2. Look for truth in the situation.

When we’re angry or upset with someone else, there’s often some truth to why we’re upset. But when we’re angry with God, it’s usually because of a lie we’re accepting as truth. Maybe we think if God loved us enough, bad things wouldn’t happen, or if God were really as all-powerful as his Word says, a close family member wouldn’t be so sick or a friend wouldn’t have died. But we can’t hold these kinds of statements up to the Bible, our standard, and see them as accurate.

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God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t hold grudges. What he does is right and good. Tweet This

God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t hold grudges. What he does is right and good. Our incomplete comprehension of who God is sometimes makes it harder for us to understand what he does and why he does it. When you find yourself getting frustrated with God’s action or lack of action, as interpreted by your own observations, pull out Scripture that reminds you of who God truly is. Here are some verses to get you started:

Jeremiah 10:10—He’s the true God, the living God, and the “eternal King.”

Isaiah 45:18—He alone is God, and there is no other.

Hebrews 4:16—We can come to God with confidence and find mercy and grace in him alone.

Isaiah 26:4—We can trust in God forever because he is everlasting.

Jeremiah 23:24—We cannot hide from God.

 

3. Ask questions.

You may have grown up in a family or a church where your faith or even your very salvation was suspect if you ever questioned God. But Job was a man who by God’s own admission had done nothing wrong, and he still experienced great personal problems and questioned God about them. So go ahead—ask the hard questions. Write those questions out in a journal, if it helps. Write out your thoughts to God while you’re there. Let your questions form into prayers, and understand God wants to listen to it all because he shows his love and his grace to his children. Ask him for deeper understanding as well.

4. Reinforce your trust.

At some point, through some circumstance or situation in your life, God showed you he is trustworthy. Think of those times when you trusted him with everything, and he provided what you needed. God doesn’t change. He is the same God who provided for you then, and he will still provide for you now. Psalm 118:8 says, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.” That means it’s better to trust in God than in ourselves too.

5. Pray.

Just as it’s hard to stay mad at someone you keep praying for, it’s hard to stay mad at God when you hold that line of communication open through prayer. Prayer builds our faith, it builds our trust, and it helps keep our perspective where it needs to be.

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God is God. He is sovereign and he is in control. We are not. Tweet This

God is God. He is sovereign and he is in control. We are not. So when we allow ourselves to get mad at God, we’re saying we don’t trust God enough to lead us, to provide for us, to understand our needs. But we know from his Word that he does, and we must take that to heart. We must believe.

 

Is there someone in your life who you’re struggling to forgive? Read my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive: Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret, available NOW wherever books are sold. Or order your signed copy from my online store at sarahorn.com/shop.

 

 

The post Mad at God? 5 Ways to Overcome Your Anger appeared first on Sara Horn.

When You’re Mad at God

The following is an edited excerpt from Sara Horn’s new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret.

We sat in the quiet of the church sanctuary, two chairs pulled together, our knees almost touching, listening to the faint laughter and conversation in the hall behind us as women lined up during the lunch break. Just a little while before, as I was speaking to the group, I saw her tears fall and thought she might need some more time just to talk. Just to be. Just to say out loud whatever was bothering her. Sometimes as a wife and a mom, you don’t always get that opportunity.

She started telling me about her kids. Her son was nine with muscular dystrophy. He was starting to have enough difficulty walking that they knew he probably needed to start using a wheelchair soon. Her daughter, a little younger, had autism. This young mom sat in front of me, looking helpless and tired and worn down and much older than her actual age. As her tears fell and she wiped her nose with a tissue, she assured me over and over how much she loved her kids. But then she took a breath and looked at me, ready to unload what I’m sure was on her heart during that morning’s session.

“I love my kids. But I’m not sure if I love God anymore,” she said. “I don’t understand how he could allow these things to happen to my kids. They’re kids. They’re innocent. Neither one of them will ever have the chance to just be normal. My son may not even grow up to be an adult.” She paused. “What did they do to deserve these lives they’ve been given?” Her lip trembled.

“I’m so mad at him,” she said. “I stopped praying a long time ago, because he didn’t seem to answer anything I asked. Why would God do this? Why would he do this to children? Why would he do this to my husband and me?”

Things happen in our lives, hurts and disappointments and tragedies we can’t explain and don’t understand. If you’re not a Christian and you don’t have that relationship with Christ, you might be prone to say God is out to get you. But if you are a Christian and you do know Christ and his love and you strive to follow him and live for him, you may not want to say God is out to get you out loud, but you secretly may still wonder deep down if he is—or at least you question what he’s thinking….

 

5 Ways to Deal With Your Anger Towards God
1. Realize you have a choice.

No one makes you angry with God. You choose that feeling, and when you allow resentment to separate you from God, to build up a wall of your own making, you choose a form of bitterness over his love. Don’t be bitter. Don’t throw away the goodness of God in your life. Sometimes when we say we’re angry with God, we’re really just afraid he can’t do anything about our hurts. Choose to give your pain to God.

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes.

Death will no longer exist;

grief, crying, and pain will exist no longer,

because the previous things have passed away.

         (Revelation 21:4)

 

2. Look for truth in the situation.

When we’re angry or upset with someone else, there’s often some truth to why we’re upset. But when we’re angry with God, it’s usually because of a lie we’re accepting as truth. Maybe we think if God loved us enough, bad things wouldn’t happen, or if God were really as all-powerful as his Word says, a close family member wouldn’t be so sick or a friend wouldn’t have died. But we can’t hold these kinds of statements up to the Bible, our standard, and see them as accurate.

God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t hold grudges. What he does is right and good. Our incomplete comprehension of who God is sometimes makes it harder for us to understand what he does and why he does it. When you find yourself getting frustrated with God’s action or lack of action, as interpreted by your own observations, pull out Scripture that reminds you of who God truly is. Here are some verses to get you started:

Jeremiah 10:10—He’s the true God, the living God, and the “eternal King.”

Isaiah 45:18—He alone is God, and there is no other.

Hebrews 4:16—We can come to God with confidence and find mercy and grace in him alone.

Isaiah 26:4—We can trust in God forever because he is everlasting.

Jeremiah 23:24—We cannot hide from God.

 

3. Ask questions.

You may have grown up in a family or a church where your faith or even your very salvation was suspect if you ever questioned God. But Job was a man who by God’s own admission had done nothing wrong, and he still experienced great personal problems and questioned God about them. So go ahead—ask the hard questions. Write those questions out in a journal, if it helps. Write out your thoughts to God while you’re there. Let your questions form into prayers, and understand God wants to listen to it all because he shows his love and his grace to his children. Ask him for deeper understanding as well.

4. Reinforce your trust.

At some point, through some circumstance or situation in your life, God showed you he is trustworthy. Think of those times when you trusted him with everything, and he provided what you needed. God doesn’t change. He is the same God who provided for you then, and he will still provide for you now. Psalm 118:8 says, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.” That means it’s better to trust in God than in ourselves too.

5. Pray.

Just as it’s hard to stay mad at someone you keep praying for, it’s hard to stay mad at God when you hold that line of communication open through prayer. Prayer builds our faith, it builds our trust, and it helps keep our perspective where it needs to be.

God is God. He is sovereign and he is in control. We are not. So when we allow ourselves to get mad at God, we’re saying we don’t trust God enough to lead us, to provide for us, to understand our needs. But we know from his Word that he does, and we must take that to heart. We must believe.

 

Is there someone in your life who you’re struggling to forgive? Read my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive: Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret, available NOW wherever books are sold. Or order your signed copy from my online store at sarahorn.com/shop.

 

 

Release Day is Tomorrow!

My new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret, officially releases TOMORROW, and I am so excited to share it with you!

Tonight we will be at LifeWay in Baton Rouge from 6-8 p.m. celebrating, and I hope to share pictures with you here on the blog tomorrow, so be sure to come back and visit so you can see all of the fun! (Or if you can come in person, please do!)

No book is ever published without an enormous amount of help and team effort, and there are many people I’m thankful for, but I do want to give a special word of thanks to my amazing ladies who served on my launch team this year.

We had 65 apply and chose 55. A big thanks to ALL of them for their help and assistance in reading the book and spreading the word! Please check out their blogs in the links provided.

A BIG THANK YOU GOES TO…



Jamie Bazil
Michelle Hieb
Rebecca Ruiz


Adriana Bedwell
Stephanie Higginbotham
Debi Schuhow


Amber Bridges
Pam Horton

(New Direction Life Coaching)
Andrea Sikes

(Sikes Army Wife)


Donna Burkemper
Amanda Johnson

(Faith, Family, Friends & Love)
Katie Jo Soukup


Amanda Burnem
Nicholle Light
Karen St Clair


Angela Caban

(Home Front United)
Rhonda Love

(Rhonda Sites Love)
Penny Swanson


Brooke Cahilly
Holly Massie

(Tim’s Army Wifey)
Lynne Tan


Lashon Campbell

(My Crazy Life as a Navy Wife)
Rebecca Maynard
Erin Vilhauer


Chelsea Carman

(Chelsea’s Daily Coffee)
 Ainsley McMaster
Tina Waldo


Carrie Carson

(A Lovely Little Wardrobe)
Danielle Merryman
Karen Wallace


Jillian Corkins

(All These Crazy Girls)
Krystal Metcalf
Tiffany Whalen

(Growing From the Obstacles)


April Dangerfield
Diane Meyer
Jennifer Wilkinson


Kristina Dignan
Gena Morgan
Jennifer Wolfe


Ashley Dixon
Carlise Myers

(Simply Carlise)
Jennifer Wright


Melissa Esnault
Cate Nichols

(The Write Stuff)



Julie Fogt
Jessa Olson

(The Jessa Olson)



Jennifer Gelert

(Lars and Jennifer)
Christie Pickard

(Christie Pickard)



Sarah Glover

(Cottage and Hen)
Sheryl Plott



Natasha Grimes

(A Life Worth Living for Him)
Pattie Reitz

(Fresh Brewed Writer)



Katie Heine
Brandy Richardson

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When You’re Pressed Out

I recently spent six weeks with some special ladies at my church walking through a first-draft of what I hope will become a Bible study that goes along with my book, My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife. On the last Sunday of our study, I was so encouraged by one friend in particular who shared an amazing testimony of the turn-around she has witnessed in her marriage over the course of the study. She said that it all started to change when she stopped thinking about what SHE wanted, and instead, started thinking about what GOD wanted.

For the first time in almost the entire duration of their marriage – more than a decade – she’s seen what she could only describe as a “complete transformation” in herself and in her husband. Her biggest fear was that she would “lose herself” or become someone she didn’t want to be when she decided she would stop being so concerned about herself and focus, instead, on God and her husband – BUT, she says she has felt the exact opposite! Such a beautiful amazing example of what can happen when we’re willing to let go of our own natural selfish tendencies and ask God to work in our lives instead. I know that’s what I’ve experienced in my life and my marriage, and it is THRILLING when I hear from another wife who has experienced the same thing!

I read a quote from Oswald Chambers a few months ago in my quiet time that said this:

“Jesus did not say—‘he that believeth in Me shall realize the blessing of the fullness of God,’ but—‘he that believeth in Me, out of him shall escape everything he receives.’ Our Lord’s teaching is always anti-self-realization. His purpose is not the development of a man; His purpose is to make a man exactly like Himself, and the characteristic of the Son of God is self-expenditure.” ~ Oswald Chambers

The desire to become more like Christ is not pain-free. The more I want to press in to Him, to follow and become more like Him, the more it feels like I’m being pressed OUT – my self-centered ways, my concerns and worries about me, myself and I, all slowly being pushed out to the sides as Christ takes residence in the center. It’s not always a great feeling.

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The more I press in to Him, to become more like Him, the more it feels like I’m being pressed OUT…Tweet This

I thought about this when I attempted ravioli dough for the first time the other day. Each time as the dough passed through the pasta roller, it got a little closer to the consistency, the state, that was needed to form the best ravioli, to hold that delicate but important filling. After all, it’s the filling that makes the ravioli, right? But here’s the thing – to get to that point, to get to that goal –  the pressing, the process, the REFINING… all of it is necessary. 

Letting God refine and press us out so we can press in to Him is also necessary. It’s necessary for our relationship with Him – and it’s necessary for our relationships with our husbands, our kids, and anyone else God asks us to be a blessing to.

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Our influence on our husbands and children are in direct proportion to the influence God has on us.Tweet This

Our influence on our husbands and children are in direct proportion to the influence God has on us. Do we desire to see change in our families? Then we have to desire for God to make changes in us.

Pray this prayer with me today: Jesus, please help me not give up or walk away or stop in place when the refining feels too much. Help me release what needs to be let go, so there is room in my heart and life for what You want to bring in, and what You want to pour out on others as You use me for Your purpose today. 

 

One thing that keeps us from pressing in is when we’re holding onto bitterness or regret. If you are struggling with this, let me encourage you to order my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive. What distracts our hearts distracts our souls. It’s time we say no to the distraction and say yes to a life of living free from resentment and regret!