Sara Horn's Blog, page 5

When Life Doesn’t Fit Your Plan

I stood in line waiting for my zone to be called so I could make my way onto the plane. The gate area was crowded, filled with people jostling, doing that nudge, step, nudge, I’m-not- really-trying-to-move-in-front-of-you-but-yes-I-really-am  kind of dance.

Still feeling the effects of full days and late nights from the conference I’d just left, I looked forward to going home. I was tired, a good tired, but I could feel my body’s silent alarm blinking the way my phone does when it hasn’t been charged in awhile… this girl’s battery had just about 10% juice left.

The line slowly moved forward single file, inching its way towards the spot where one gate attendant stood, scanning boarding passes, and where I noticed a woman step out of line. She was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, her hair in a touseled pony tail and in one hand she held a big purse, more like a large tote that was filled to overflowing, and in the other a carry-on piece of luggage with wheels. In front of her stood a short little blonde-haired girl, probably no more than two.

The woman walked a few steps away from the line with a loud sigh. Offering a half-hearted yank, she jerked the carryon up and attempted to set it inside the metal box sitting at her feet, which displayed a sign that read “does your bag fit?”

The bag perched on top of the metal box, like an oversized lid. Clearly, it did not.

I couldn’t see the gate attendant through the crowd of people but I could see the woman, and in one frustrated motion she pulled her luggage back to her side and sank straight down on the ground beside it, as her little girl looked at her with a confused expression on her face.

I could not see that dear lady’s face in that moment, but I could feel that mom’s exhaustion and “I give up” attitude from where I stood. I could feel her helplessness and hopelessness in those few tense seconds because I’ve also been in those “can anything else go wrong?” moments too. Haven’t you?

Really. Can anything else go wrong?

You plan on your luggage fitting the required space, but then someone tells you it doesn’t and it’s the final “no” in a long day of “no’s” that is just the no that wrecks you.

You dream of how your child will blossom and succeed in school and instead she struggles and limps her way through and you find yourself limping too.

You love and rely on your husband and never expect he will disappoint and hurt you in a way you never saw coming – until it happens and you’re wondering where your plan went wrong.

You have the job you’ve always wanted until corporate layoffs happen, and suddenly you don’t.

You have the life you’ve always wanted, a stay-at-home mama who loves volunteering at your kid’s school and your church, until your husband gets severely ill with a chronic disease and suddenly you’re working a job you don’t particularly like and serving as a caregiver about 30 years sooner than you were expecting.

Here’s what I’m learning, though, about the things that seem to go sideways and happen beyond our control. Our circumstances may not fit our plans, but God’s plan always includes our circumstances.

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Our circumstances may not fit our plans, but God’s plan always includes our circumstances.Tweet This

Romans 8:28 offers this reminder:

“We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.”

Notice this verse doesn’t say that we know all GOOD things work together… no, it says ALL things work together – even the moments we wish never were.

Because let’s be honest, sweet friends, most of us like to be in control. And if we’re in control, why would we choose the difficult over the easy? Who wants the hurtful if we can have the happy? Who wants cauliflower when we can have chocolate?

Here’s what I do know.

When we let go of trying to control everything, we are much more willing to hold on to God – sometimes for dear life! And that’s exactly where He wants us.

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When we let go of trying to control everything, we are much more willing to hold on to GodTweet This
5 Reasons to Stop Trying To Control Everything

He doesn’t want us on our own – He wants us for His own. Because when we commit our lives to Christ, our lives are no longer about us. It’s all about Him. (Galatians 2:19-20)


We can trust Him when He takes us down roads we do not recognize. (Proverbs 3:5)


We can trust Him even in the midst of things going wrong. (Psalm 91:1-16)


We can trust that He is in the details of our lives – from the mundane of getting a grocery list together to the hyper importance of changing jobs or moving from Point A to Point B. (Jeremiah 17:7-8)


We can trust God when we take a breath, reset, and choose to take that next step – by listening to His voice instead of our own. (Romans 15:13)

Yes, it’s true our circumstances may not always fit our plans – but we can know God’s plan always includes our circumstances. Let’s focus less on controlling what we can’t, and be more intentional in following where He leads.

Your Turn: Where do you struggle with controlling something yourself, or letting God take control? Share your thoughts in the comments. 

 

Do you struggle with trying to stay strong and in control – and you’re more likely to lose it when you’re not? My book, GOD Strong, may encourage you to depend on God’s strength through the hard stuff of life. Though it’s written primarily with a military wife audience in mind, women of all walks of life will benefit from the scriptural truth. Purchase your copy here. 

Pre-Order How Can I Possibly Forgive before October 1st and receive 3 bonus gifts!

 

3 Myths That Make it Harder to Forgive

The following is an excerpt from the book,  How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret , available in stores October 1st.

Forgiveness isn’t easy, is it?

I haven’t found it to be in my life, and I’m assuming since you’re reading this, you probably haven’t either. But maybe you didn’t pick this [book] up for you. Maybe you saw this title and thought of someone close to you who struggles with some things. Maybe it’s things you’ve done, or that other people in your family or circle of friends have done, and she’s moody or shows her hurt feelings or gets offended easily, and you’ve thought more than once, “Oh, my goodness, she just needs to get over it!”

We’re tempted to say that, especially when we can’t see the harm that’s been done or the hurt in someone else’s heart. But while all of us need to “get over” something so we can get on with living, it isn’t as easy as flipping a switch, which sometimes that phrase implies.

Maybe we’ve even given this speech to ourselves: I just need to get over her hurtful comment. Or I just need to get over what he did last week and stop thinking about it. The answer to moving on from a hurtful situation isn’t burying the problem or the hurt, but that’s what most of us are tempted to do. As you’ve read, you may even have thought of shortcuts you can take when it comes to this whole forgiveness thing. Do you really need to try and have that conversation? Can’t you just accept or right things that are wrong in your own heart and move on?

Maybe. Maybe not. So let’s talk about some of the myths we fall for when it comes to forgiveness. Which ones have you tried before?

Myth: Forgiveness Should Be Easy

When we need it, forgiveness seems like it should be an easy thing to do. But it’s a whole lot harder when we’re asked to give it. When you forgive, you’re letting something go, and most people’s tendency, our natural inclination as we’ve discussed, is to hold on.

I want to forgive. I want to have no record of wrongs for anyone in my life. I don’t want to wake up with hurt, and I don’t want to look back with regrets. I want a clean heart, a pure heart, a heart that operates from honest motives with no hidden agendas, and I want people around me to do the same.

“Can’t we all just get along?” someone once asked, at the height of a raging conflict.

But we don’t all get along, at least not all the time. None of us have always gotten along. Just look at poor Adam and Eve—their first argument came about because of a piece of fruit, when Eve made a decision that cost them not just the beautiful home where they were living, but altered their relationship with God and with each other. I wonder how that conversation went, as they spent their first night outside their beloved garden, now forbidden to them, sitting on opposite ends of a log, trying to stay warm by a tiny fire that Adam took forever to make, which might have gone quicker had Eve just brought the right twigs and tree limbs to begin with. (Just sayin’.)

In the book of Numbers, the Israelites got tired of the manna God sent them daily. There were only so many ways you could cook up manna, and some of the Israelites had apparently seen their fill. I’m sure there were some meat-and-potato kind of men in the camp who were over the whole manna quiche and manna crepes and manna bread their wives were coming up with. They wanted something they could really put between their teeth.

When you read this in Numbers 11, you can almost see the humor (dark or not) in it. The Israelites whine and complain and fuss and fume because they’ve had it up to their portable George Foreman grills with the manna, and God gets very angry. Then we’re told that Moses also gets angry and (maybe not thinking so clearly) takes his frustration out on God—“Why have You brought such trouble on Your servant? Why are You angry with me, and why do You burden me with all these people? Did I conceive all those people? Did I give them birth… ?” (11:11-12, emphasis mine). There was a whole lot of not getting along happening right there.

Our human nature leaves us emotional. Impulsive. We’re quick to judgment and slow to consideration for others. That’s why we have to be taught to share when we’re little. Why we have to teach our kids over and over again, to say thank you and please and not to ask for things that aren’t theirs.

But when we invite Christ into our lives, we are not left with just our human nature, and we don’t have to be how we were. We can remember the words we read in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look, new things have come.”

So forgiveness isn’t easy for us, but it is possible with God. And when we rely on him to help us forgive someone of their wrongs, we can anticipate the newness he will do in our own lives. When you let go of something in your heart, you make room for something brand-new.

Myth: Forgiveness Is Optional

When we buy into this myth that we don’t have to forgive, we’re wearing the same attitude as that of one wife who was sitting in a marriage counselor’s office.

“Do you love your husband?” the counselor asked her.

“Love him?” she said, a little incredulously. “Love him? Of course, I love him!” Then she looked over at her husband. “I just don’t like him!”

When we tell ourselves we’ll just get over our hurt or irritation or frustration with someone, without forgiving that person, without saying, “I’m letting that hurt go, and I forgive what they did, and that hurt is no longer part of my thinking or part of my feelings,” aren’t we just putting a bandage over a scratch without adding anything to prevent it from getting infected? Sometimes scratches can heal by themselves, but they can also get worse. Sometimes they can hurt longer than they might have if we’d just added the antibacterial ointment to begin with. Sometimes, they leave scars.

So many scriptures point to forgiveness as the best choice in life, and many more don’t actually mention the word forgiveness, but they stress the importance of not leaving hard feelings on the table.

And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ (Ephesians 4:32).
Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive (Colossians 3:12-13).
“And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you your wrongdoing” (Mark 11:25).

God wants peace for our lives, and love in our hearts for him and for others, and how can we do that if we hold on to grudges or refuse to let hurts go and we don’t forgive?

Forgiveness isn’t optional. God makes it very clear in his Word that if we want his forgiveness when we mess up, we have to offer the same to others.

Myth: Forgiveness Doesn’t Cost Anything

I think a lot of us go into wanting to forgive someone, or hoping to get over a situation or a hurtful circumstance, thinking it shouldn’t be that hard to forgive. In our heads and our hearts, if we know Jesus, we know what he did for us; we know we’re forgiven, so we should forgive others. So we get up each and every morning with the intention of forgiving that person who hurt us or who keeps saying those mean things to us. But by the end of the day, when we finally lay our heads on our pillows, looking back at how the day went, we didn’t do anything that looks like forgiveness, and we may have just let the feelings get worse.

I think this happens because we don’t recognize that forgiveness does cost something. Or maybe we do realize it—and that’s why we don’t forgive easily, because we’re not willing to pay the price.

Forgiving your husband for emotional or physical betrayal is costly. Forgiving a relative or a parent of sexual or physical or emotional abuse costs something. Forgiving a coworker who blamed you for their mistake, with serious consequences, can cost you. Forgiving people who abandoned you during your divorce or during your rehab or during treatment for your disease comes with a price. The cost is costly. The cost is part of you.

First, forgiveness costs you your claim for justice. Your right to restitution. Repayment. Compensation, emotional or otherwise. When you forgive, you’re saying that person doesn’t owe you. Anything.

Second, forgiveness costs you part of yourself. When I think about forgiveness, I think of the sacrifice involved. You’re giving up your claim for justice; you’re also giving up the need to be right. Like a soldier who selflessly throws himself on a live grenade for his fellow troops, absorbing the impact of the blast so they don’t have to, that’s what happens when we forgive. We absorb what’s been done, we fold ourselves over the wrong, we cover over the hurt, but we don’t do it on our own and we don’t hold on to it ourselves. We release it to God, and he takes it, along with all the wrongs that we ourselves are responsible for.

So, yes, forgiveness costs. But what we receive in place of what’s given far outweighs the price.

 

Want to know what other myths we buy into when we’re talking about forgiveness? Read How Can I Possibly Forgive: Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret , available Oct. 1 wherever books are sold. Or order your signed copy from my online store at sarahorn.com/shop.

Announcing Some Fun In-Store Locations & Events

I’m excited to announce that in October, I’m doing a mini book tour at a few specific LifeWay Christian Store locations! I would LOVE to see you! Please take a moment to look at the list of store locations, dates and times where I will be, and if you’re willing, download the materials and help us promote each event by sharing with your friends! These things are a whole lot more fun when a bunch of girlfriends get together!

 

 

 

 

September 30, 2014

BOOK RELEASE PARTY

6 to 8 p.m.

LifeWay Christian Store

Baton Rouge, LA

5915 Bluebonnet Blvd.

(near Mall of Louisiana)

Poster   |    Fliers

October 4, 2014

BOOKSIGNING

1 p.m. to 3 p.m.

LifeWay Christian Store

Gulfport, MS

15128 Crossroads Pkwy.

(Crossroads Shopping Center)

Poster  |  Fliers

October 9, 2014

BOOKSIGNING

6 p.m. to 8 p.m.

LifeWay Christian Store

Fayetteville, NC

1728 Skibo Road

(Cross Creek Shopping Plaza)

Poster  |   Fliers

October 14, 2014

BOOKSIGNING

11 a.m. – 1 p.m.

LifeWay Christian Store

Newport News, VA

12551 Jefferson Ave.

(Jefferson Commons Shopping Center)

Poster | Fliers

5 Ways to Forgive Yourself

Sometimes the person we have the most trouble forgiving is ourselves. We can’t forget the mistake we made that cost us a relationship or hurt or disappointed someone we loved. We struggle with what we did or didn’t do, and we hold back from doing anything because we don’t want to repeat what happened before. We can’t change the past. But we can change what we do moving forward. The first step is to forgive.

1. Write a letter to God.

Tell him everything you’re struggling with and why you’re finding it hard to forgive yourself. Then read these scriptures and tell God why you know he’s already forgiven you: 1 John 1:9; Isaiah 43:25; 2 Chronicles 7:14; and Proverbs 28:13.

Pray and ask God to help you forgive yourself. You may find it helpful to tear up or burn the letter after you’ve prayed. As you see the letter vanish, understand that God has also forgiven and removed your sin. You can freely forgive yourself because there’s nothing left to hold on to.

2. Focus on what’s good in your life.

We often let the negative far outweigh everything else that’s wonderful. When in a state of unforgiveness, it’s easy to see everything with a gloomy cast or tint to it. But there are blessings in your life right now that God wants you to see and remember. What about your kids? What about your spouse? What about the work you do or the volunteering or ministry you’re part of in your church or community? What about the friends who have stood by you, especially during the hard times?

Make a list of those blessings or a list of what you’re grateful for, and read that list daily so you can start seeing the good that’s in your life and not just the bad. Ask God to help you see his little blessings each day and make a choice to look intentionally for them and be grateful.

3. Let go a little bit each day.

Just as forgiving someone else can be a process and not happen immediately, the same can be said when it’s about forgiving yourself. Give yourself time—but don’t stop being intentional. Each day ask God to heal your heart a little more, and each day allow yourself less and less time to focus on what went wrong.

4. Believe today is a new day, full of promise and of hope.

We have hope because of the promise Christ fulfilled for us. Think about the day after his crucifixion and what that must have been like for the people who loved and followed him. But what about the next day? When Jesus came out of that tomb, he brought with him hope for the world. We can hope for nothing greater than a relationship and eternity with him. Everything else pales in comparison. We have hope because of Christ. We have second chances because of the gift of God’s Son to us all.

5. Focus on growing into the person God wants you to become.

We hear often that God loves us just the way we are, and I believe that’s true. He loves us and asks us to come to him, just as we are. Broken, banged up, or bruised. But I don’t believe he wants us to stay exactly how we start. That’s because all of us are born sinners (Romans 3:23) in need of a relationship with God, who saves us and who loves us and who wants us to become more like him.

Peter ends his second letter with these words: “Therefore, dear friends, since you know this in advance, be on your guard, so that you are not led away by the error of lawless people and fall from your own stability. But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 3:17-18a, emphasis mine). Learning to forgive—others as well as ourselves—brings us that much closer to him.

 

Have you struggled with forgiving yourself or someone else? Let me invite you to read my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive: Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret, available Oct. 1 wherever books are sold. Or pre-order your signed copy from my online store at sarahorn.com/shop. What distracts our hearts distracts our souls. Say no to distraction.

Food-Day Friday: Copy-cat Chick-fil-a Chicken Cheddar Biscuit

I’ve decided that as often as I can, I’m going to use Fridays to share fun recipes I’ve tried out on my family.  I did the one that I’m sharing with you today, with my guys a couple of weeks ago, and since the founder of Chick-fil-a passed away this week, maybe the timing is more than right, maybe it’s fitting too.

About a month ago, I ran across this recipe for recreating Chick-fil-a chicken sandwiches. Now, if you don’t live near a Chick-fil-a, you may not appreciate this nor really care. And that is OK. But we live at least 30 minutes away from the closest one and so we don’t just get the craving for a chicken sandwich on Sundays and have to tell ourselves no – it happens a lot more often than that.

(SIDE NOTE: We did live in an apartment complex in South Carolina several years ago that was located RIGHT BEHIND a Chick-fil-a, and we made good use of the location, let me assure you – a two-minute walk for chicken biscuits on Saturday mornings, and peach milkshakes during the summer. Yes ma’am!)

I saw the recipe for the chicken – but then I also saw this crazy idea going around on Facebook about combining Chick-fil-a chicken with the Red Lobster Garlic Butter and Cheese biscuits – and oh my goodness, I was suddenly not thinking just dinner, but that this could quickly turn into a family adventure!

So that’s what we did one Friday night. We got into the kitchen and cooked ourselves a Chick-fil-a and Red Lobster tribute! And can I just say – I will always look at pickle juice with a healthy respect and love from now on!

FIRST, THE CHICKEN.

As I mentioned earlier, I used this recipe as my base – but did not follow it exactly; the biggest change I made was that I used more chicken then two pieces. But also, considering we were using Red Lobster Garlic Biscuits for our bread, I probably didn’t have to fix as much as I did.

After soaking the chicken in pickle juice (Dill is what we used) for a good portion of the afternoon, I beat them with a rolling pin to get them good and flat (though when I got ready to fry them in a pan on the stove later, I regretted not making a point to cut off excess fat – so do that before you marinate them).

Then I dredged them up in the dry ingredients  (flour, sugar, garlic salt, celery salt, basil, paprika, salt and pepper) after dipping the chicken in a mixture of beaten egg and milk.

I got my pan started by pouring the peanut oil in and turning the heat up to medium – yes, I decided if we were going to do this, we were going to do this right, and I went with the recommended peanut oil – aka, sell your plasma to afford this oil. I think my grocery store had it for $14? What was I thinking, you ask? These better be some really fine and completely like the chick-fil-a chicken I’m thinking about! That’s what I was thinking.

In went my chicken, and I cooked each one 3 to 4 minutes on each side, though I confess not all of them turned out like this golden little guy at the bottom of the picture to the right. The oil got hotter the longer I cooked – so keep that in mind so you don’t have dark brown chicken instead of the golden kind you’re looking for.

(Though I have to confess – we were all snacking so much as each piece of chicken was cooked and put on the cutting board to rest – we didn’t really notice the darker spots. Pickle juice, people. Who would have thought?)

By the way – pay no attention to that chocolate chip cookie that’s sitting at the stove along with that piece of chicken – sometimes we eat dessert first. I won’t judge you if you don’t judge me.

Here’s the golden brown to not so golden… just keepin’ it real y’all – but still real tasty!!

 

NOW FOR THE NOT-QUITE WAFFLE FRIES

So as we were working on chicken, we were also working on potatoes – er, fries. Because really, what’s a chick-fil-a sandwich without waffle fries to go with them?

There was only one problem though – I did not have a waffle fry cutter. I did however have a salad shooter with a potato chip attachment.

If you squint just so… they kinda look like waffle fries. Can’t see it? You must not be squinting right.

I followed this recipe – I liked the recommendation for double frying – and they didn’t turn out half bad, though if they’d been cut thicker like waffle fries, I think the result would have been much better. But we had Polynesian dipping sauce, so it was all good.

POLYNESIAN SAUCE

YES, I did. I did say Polynesian dipping sauce. Copycat Polynesian sauce. Because as far as I’m concerned, Polynesian sauce is like the butter in Peanut Butter and Jelly – you can’t have chick-fil-a chicken and waffle, er potato-chip fries, without it.

Finally, it was time to make the Red Lobster Garlic Biscuits. We don’t get the kit often, but sometimes when we go to Sam’s, I’ll pick one up because it has three packages in one box. My husband took on the duties for this part of the meal.

So once these were done, we quickly realized that we were going to have to cut the chicken pieces (what was left that we hadn’t been eating while we fixed everything else) so they would fit on the garlic cheddar biscuits. But we weren’t going to let a little thing like that stop us!

This was a lot of fun, and VERY DEE-LICIOUS, as you can judge from the smiles on the faces of my guys. Ignoring the fact that I think we dirtied just about every pan and bowl and knife I had in my kitchen, it was one fun night! Let me clarify that – it was one very tasty night!

 

 

Plan your own family copycat night in – I’d love to hear about it!

13 years after 9/11, a note to my 13-year-old son

Dear Caleb,

This morning you came into our kitchen and gave me a hug, your arms easily reaching over my shoulders now that you’re a good 4 inches taller than I am. As you sat down for breakfast at the counter, you mentioned some of the pictures your friends were posting on Instagram about 9/11 and how it was really sad all of those people died.

Suddenly, I wasn’t in our kitchen anymore, but sitting in our small apartment in Jackson, TN, thirteen years ago, holding you as I watched the news coverage, waiting for your dad to get home from work so we could just.be.together.

That had been the longest day. It had been a beautiful day, weather wise. No one getting up that morning would have guessed the ugly dark pain that would envelop our country in just a matter of hours. I was the news director for a Christian university, and I remember our graphic designer coming into work, asking “did you hear a plane flew into the World Trade Center?” She’d just been there, visiting New York, a few weeks before.

The few televisions we had sprinkled through the offices were turned on, and I remember the quiet, and the stillness, as we stood, some sitting, hands to faces, hands over mouths, taking in what was happening as the second plane hit the second tower. As we and the rest of the country started realizing the reality of the situation, as word came of another plane flying into the Pentagon, another plane crashing in a field somewhere in Pennsylvania, my phone started ringing, and it rang all day from students and professors helping students who had family in New York and wanted to get in touch with them but couldn’t.

Remember. Never forget.

 

I sat in front of the television that night, holding you, then just six months old, wondering what kind of world you would grow up in.

Because that’s the day everything changed.

That’s the day we watched thousands of people die, we watched fire fighters and paramedics and police rush to help only to die themselves when the towers fell, that’s the day we watched hospital staff helplessly standing outside their ERs ready to assist survivors and no survivors came. That’s the day we began seeing families on the news holding up pictures of their loved ones, plastering them on buildings, asking, begging, for anyone that might know where they were and praying they weren’t actually in the towers when they fell.

But you don’t know that day. Not really. Only from what you’ve been told by us, and from what you’ve learned at school. From pictures you’ve seen and stories you’ve read.

I realized something else this morning, though. You and your 13-year-old friends who were also born that year, in 2001, you don’t know what the day before 9/11 was like either.

You don’t know what it was ever like to walk into the airport and through security without a ticket just to go watch the planes take off and land, or say goodbye to a family member or friend, or say hello to someone arriving.

You don’t know what it was ever like when we didn’t have to get practically undressed to walk through an airport scanner that sees you practically naked anyway, or what it was like to carry your normal size shampoo bottles and toothpaste in your carry-on and not think twice about it.

You don’t really know what patriotism used to look like here in our country, when freedom in America was truly celebrated instead of sometimes debated. You were just a baby and can’t remember the outpour of emotion from so many Americans in those days following 9/11. How people returned to church who hadn’t darkened the door in a while. How people turned to each other, and helped each other, and cared more about each other. These days we’re not as anxious to reach out and help a stranger as maybe we used to be.

You don’t know what it was ever like to play outside for hours at a time or run around the neighborhood. These days, you complain because you never see kids outside when I do try to get you to move away from the xbox. And I wonder if some of that has to do with the fear that settled in many a new parent’s heart that day they watched the planes hit the towers – that you can do everything you can to protect your child, protect your family, protect yourself – and still, there’s an uncertainty that someone may try to hurt you or them anyway. So parents have held on even tighter, and when you and your friends played outside, we sat outside watching, and when you tried to be adventurous, we weren’t always so encouraging. We were more cautious and careful. And maybe as a result, you’re more cautious and careful. And there are days I feel sad about that.

You don’t know what it’s like for our country to not be at war, for service members to be home and not deploying, for military families who weren’t saying goodbye on a regular basis and separated from each other more often than they were together.

You don’t know the difference between military reservists and National Guard service members and active duty members – because their jobs look a whole lot more the same today than they did 13 years ago.

 

You do know that your dad has deployed 3 times in the last six years, 10 months at a time. You experienced kindergarten to first grade, the challenges of fourth grade to fifth in a different state and a new school, and you spent last year navigating the challenges of 7th grade with just your crazy mom to help you manage the beginning of puberty. You turned 13 while your dad was still away on his last deployment to Afghanistan. You were no longer a little boy when he came home just a month or so later, and you could almost look him eye to eye thanks to the growth spurt you had while he was gone.

 

Homecoming 2007

 

 

 

Homecoming 2011

 

Homecoming 2014

 

You don’t know this, but I think about that lost time sometimes and can’t help but wonder how the last six years might have looked if the towers hadn’t fell that day and you’d grown up with both parents around all the time to hassle you. I think about the families who lost their loved ones that day, and I think about the military families who have since said goodbye to more than 7500 loved ones since we went to war in Afghanistan and then Iraq. I think about the marriages of military that haven’t survived, of the family breakups, all unspoken casualties of war.

You don’t know about all of the loss that happened that day the towers fell, or what we’ve lost since. But you do know some of what’s been gained, even if you don’t realize it.

You know our family doesn’t take each other for granted. Ever.

 

 

You know what it means to serve for the good of all, and that even in the struggle and hurt of not having your dad home when you wanted him, that there is something right and good and important about being willing to stand for something important when not everyone else will.

You know that despite the challenges you hear about on the news and the discussions you hear your dad and I having when we’re concerned or we’re frustrated or we’re unhappy with how things seem to be, that the freedoms we have here in America are still worth being proud of, and still worth fighting for.

You know what it means to have a personal relationship with Christ – and for that, I’m so grateful.

You know, or at least I hope you’re learning at 13 years old, that no matter how out of control life can seem sometimes, that God is always in control, and He is who we put our trust in.

You know, or at least we’re trying to teach you, that even when towers fall, whether the physical kind, or the towers in our own lives that represent hopes or dreams or plans that turn into disappointments and hurts when something unexpected doesn’t go our way, you know that God is still there, and we can still put our trust in Him.

It was hard this morning not to get emotional when I thought about all of the loss that’s happened. But it’s also easy to get emotional thinking about all that God has provided. I pray you’ll keep seeing His provision each day as you get older, as you grow emotionally and spiritually, as you listen and learn to trust in Him more and more.

 

So, maybe now you know why I teared up over cereal as I talked to you about that day 13 years ago. Why I hugged you a little longer before we got in the car to go to school. Why I made you hug your dad this morning instead of your usual “bye dad” wave as you headed out the door.

Remembering the moments of 13 years ago make me appreciate the moments we have today even more.

Let’s not waste any.

3 Ways to Stop Taking Everything So Personally

Do you ever notice how easy it is sometimes to get offended? A co-worker makes a comment that goes beyond just funny sarcasm, or a friend at church seems to be deliberately trying to avoid you. Maybe there’s one extended family member who knows just what to say to make you feel like crawling under a rock – every single time you’re together.

So how do we deal with hurtful cuts or painful slights when others decide to “bless” us with them? What choices do we have that don’t involve locking ourselves inside our homes and never talking to anyone again just so we don’t run the risk of getting our feelings hurt? Read on for an excerpt from my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Our Hearts from Resentment and Regret, for three things you can STOP doing today that will also help STOP those hurts – or at least help you START moving past them.

 

We have to stop taking things so personally.

When we develop the patience for other people, we can also develop the skill to overlook what they do to offend us. Being offended by others is not a new problem. The author of Ecclesiastes says it pretty plainly: “Don’t pay attention to everything people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you, for you know that many times you yourself have cursed others” (Ecclesiastes 7:21-22). I think his point is worth applying here. Other people are going to say hurtful things, and we should know, because we’ve said them ourselves.

So how do we overlook the hurts? This isn’t the same as going to the store and avoiding the candy aisle. Saying we can overlook when someone does something to upset us, and actually succeeding, well, it’s a lot easier to say than do, isn’t it?

I mentioned earlier that I’ve struggled with some of my own hurts this week as I’ve worked on this chapter. It’s always so like God to put my feet to the fire with what I’m writing and what he’s teaching me. Earlier today, I was struggling so much with my self-perceived hurts that I had to take a break and go for a walk in the sunshine. As I walked around my neighborhood, thinking about the nagging frustration that keeps darkening my spirit (and in turn coming out in my attitude with my family and others), I asked God to help me understand why I just can’t seem to let this particular hurt go. Why can’t I just move on, start fresh, and be renewed in him?

Why can’t I just move on, start fresh, and be renewed in him?

He put three thoughts in my heart that I believe you can benefit from as well. If you are struggling to let hurts go, or to overlook a specific offense from someone else, I hope these practical steps will help.

1. Stop putting words of value to your hurt.

Every time you talk about what’s bothering you or who is hurting you, what they’re doing to you, you give that hurt power over your heart and your life, and you crank up the white noise to full volume. You give the enemy more room to do more damage.

When you talk about it with your best friend over the phone or sob over it with your husband or tell your entire Bible study group over and over the wrong that’s been done to you, you aren’t moving on. You aren’t letting it go.

Let me make this clear, though. I’m not saying you should never talk about your hurt; what I am saying is when we continually talk about our hurt without looking for resolution and closure, when we dwell on the hurt and the pain it’s caused, and we don’t give that hurt to the Lord and leave it with him, we don’t move on. We don’t let go. It becomes impossible to overlook the offense that’s been done to us.

So talk with your spouse or a trusted friend or family member about your hurt, and then resolve to leave it with God. Pray over it, asking him to remove it from your life and trust that he already has. Pray for the person who’s responsible for the hurt. God will use your prayer to not only make a difference in that person’s life but in your heart as well.

 

2. Stop giving more credit to the hurt than it deserves.

We can let hurts take over our lives, and there is no reason for it. People do this sometimes in a job when they lose an account or they fail to close a deal or they’re short in sales numbers or income for the month. Maybe someone says something, someone close to them, and they’re hurt and believe that what’s been said is true. Instead of taking a breath, acknowledging the mistake, and moving on, they wallow in the mistake, they stagger around with the hurt, and it just follows them. They can’t seem to recover.

We already know God is bigger than any hurt, and he controls our future. So stop letting the hurt control your life, and instead, give your life back to God. Ask him to remove the hurt and help you find ways to move forward. Focus on what he wants you to know, what he wants to show you.

3. Stop allowing room in your heart for the hurt.

Fill that space with the knowledge and the love of Christ instead. If you have tried everything you can to resolve an issue between you and someone else, and they’ve refused your attempts, they won’t apologize or acknowledge the hurt, do what Matthew 18:17 says—“let him be like an unbeliever and a tax collector to you.” Do you really think much about the tax man? Maybe once a year? Apply the same principle here to the person who hurt you.

Holding on to hurts never hurts the person responsible for hurting us; we’re the ones who are affected. Even as I write that, though, I realize that sometimes other people are impacted. Our families, our children, or others who love us and want the best for us—those relationships can be influenced when we hold on to a hurt. Because we cling to the pain we once felt, we let that pain impact everything else. How many families have been affected because a hurt that occurred generations ago has been passed down from grandmother to mother to daughter to granddaughter? What difference would that family have experienced if the hurt had just been let go in the generation where it happened?

When we can’t let go of our hurts, we miss one very important fact: this life isn’t about us. My life is not my own when I commit it to Christ.

If you are a Christian, if you desire to follow Christ in your everyday, run-of-the-mill, eat-your-cornflakes-for-breakfast-and-fluff-your-pillow-before-you-head-to-bed life, the life you live today and every day is not your life to hold on to. Your life belongs to God, and he already holds it firmly in his hands. So that means your successes belong to God. That also means your hurts belong to him as well. As Paul so eloquently states in 1 Corinthians 7:23, we’ve been “bought at a price; do not become slaves of men.” That’s exactly what we do, though, when we don’t let go of our hurts. We hand over the freedom we know through Christ to someone else who doesn’t deserve it.

 

 

Sometimes I think we hold on to hurts because we’re walking around in this emotional fog just trying to find someone who will understand our hurt. All we want is someone to acknowledge it, to make it right, to tell us it’s OK and that things will get better. I think that’s why we talk about our hurts so much, and we throw them out there in our conversations with friends or family or the cashier at the grocery store or anyone who will listen because we just want someone to understand.

Dear sweet friend, you already have someone who understands.

Jesus understands, and those are not empty words. Jesus experienced hurts. He doesn’t tell us to overlook or move on or let go of anything he hasn’t already had to face in his own experience as fully God and fully man.

Think about it. He was loved, but he was also despised. There were crowds who loved him and wanted to hang on every word he said, and there were crowds who wanted to stone him and ultimately kill him. There were hateful things said about him, and even those most intimate to him, the disciples he loved and handpicked to be his closest friends, let him down or questioned his motives or wondered what he was thinking. Even those from his hometown, the folks he grew up around, who knew him and his mama and Joseph and the rest of the family, didn’t always see him the way God saw him, the way God knew him, who he was and what he was about.

So does Jesus know our hurts? Absolutely. Is he listening, ready to understand? Yes, in a heartbeat. His heart is big enough for all our hurts.

 

Encouraged or challenged by what you’ve read? Order How Can I Possibly Forgive: Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret after October 1, anywhere books are sold. Want a signed copy? Order now from sarahorn.com/shop.

 

What’s God Asking That You’re Avoiding?

We ended our discussion last Wednesday night at church with this question, which is still on my mind this morning, probably because it relates to another book I just finished, The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst.

“What divinely given responsibilities are you neglecting because you’re too busy controlling responsibilities God hasn’t called you to?”

When we focus on what God hasn’t given us to focus on – we not only exhaust ourselves carrying burdens and tasks we weren’t intended to carry – we MISS doing and living out what God actually has called us to do! (And then we wonder why we feel so empty or without purpose.)

I’m sharing this with myself as much as I’m sharing this with you – you may know exactly what He’s asking you to do – and it’s HARD. It’s not something easy. It may feel like it will take YEARS to accomplish. And you avoid it like you avoid cleaning the toilet (because seriously, there is nothing exciting about scrubbing pee stains off porcelain. And all the mamas of boys, from toddler to teen, say “Amen!”)

You see so many other things around you and in front of you that you can do, and you can do well! And yet – God’s not calling you to those things. He’s called you to THIS. He’s called you to this role, this purpose, this job, this mission, this task, this project… that you don’t feel equipped for, you don’t feel smart enough for, you don’t see any support for, you might not even feel the INTEREST or ENTHUSIASM for this thing because the fear and the uncertainty you’re feeling is ten times greater – but as hard as you try, you just can’t follow Taylor Swift’s advice and  “shake it off.” (Which, by the way, is a very catchy tune. That some of you probably now have in your head. You’re welcome.)

You can’t shake it off or let it go because you know it’s not your idea. It’s God’s idea for you. And God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t pick out people by accident. His timing is never wrong.

Sure,  people have tried to run from God’s plans for their lives. Jonah tried. He had the lovely experience of sitting in the rotting smelly hot noxious gut of a whale for a few days.

Moses tried. He whined and complained so much about being forced to speak that God said yes to his request to bring his brother Aaron along (the same guy who later gave in to the people’s demands to make an idol out of all their gold jewelry. He might have communicated better than Moses but he certainly wasn’t any smarter).

The Israelites tried taking matters into their own hands once or twice (or hundreds). They too experienced things you don’t put under a list of your greatest accomplishments – like wandering in a desert for 40 years or seeing your cities and nation completely disassembled and destroyed because of your severe disobedience.

No, you may not wake up tomorrow and see your house torn down as you’re hauled off to Babylon with the rest of your family – but you may miss out on some pretty incredible opportunities for blessing and for growth. Because here’s a secret: we don’t grow in our understanding of God when life’s a breeze. We grow when life throws in a few groans along the way. We stretch when we let God stretch us. We become more like Him when we let go of more of ourselves.

So what are you avoiding? What are you trying to convince yourself and God too that you’re not capable of doing? And if you’re not, why does God keep putting it on your heart to do?

The hard truth for a lot of us to accept is that it’s not about whether YOU can do it. It’s about what God will do THROUGH you. And quite frankly – if it’s not you, He’ll use someone else because God’s plans and purpose always prevail.

God doesn’t ask for people who are perfect. He asks for people who are available. He asks for people who are willing.

Need help getting started? Here are three things to think about as you move from avoiding to accepting what God’s put on your heart to do.

1. Start with one thing

Sometimes we stop before we even start because we see ALL of the things we have to do to accomplish our goal – and it is AlL overwhelming. So start with one thing. Maybe it’s making a phone call to someone who can give you some godly wisdom. Maybe it’s making one decision – a date for when you’ll accomplish what you’re working on, or an email inviting others to come join you and hear the idea God’s put on your heart. Maybe it’s finally going to the store and getting the material to make whatever it is you need to make – and no, not for a mass-produced assembly line of goods – but a few items that you’ll get started with.

Start with one thing.

2. Realize it’s not about you

When we accept Christ, it’s no longer about US. It’s about HIM. And He’s out to change the world. In our SS class we teach at church, this past Sunday my husband gave a great illustration of what Paul was trying to teach the church in Phillipi about having joy in the midst of struggle. You can have joy when you’re following JOY – in this case, a simple little formula. First Jesus, followed by Others and then Yourself. (That spells J-O-Y for us acronym-challenged peeps.)

Christ is our priority, and serving others should be our next priority. This is biblical – in Mark 12:29-31, Jesus says the greatest commandment is to love God with everything you have, and the second greatest is to love your neighbor as yourself. Not yourself and then your neighbor.

When you say no to what God’s asking you to do, you may also be saying no to making a difference in someone else’s life.

3. Declare your great Dependence

Notice I didn’t say independence. When you’re following God’s lead, there is no place you want to be except clinging and depending on Him. This is what obedience looks like. This is what trust looks like. This is what faith looks like. Acknowledging you cannot do what you’ve been asked to do on your own. And that’s ok – that’s exactly what God wants to hear, because that means all of the credit doesn’t go to your intelligence, or your great talent, but on HIS mercy and HIS grace and HIS amazing, miraculous ways.

So declare your dependence on God – and honor Him through your obedience.

Then watch for His provision.

What do you think? Is obeying God hard? What makes it so hard to do – when was the last time you obeyed God, even when you weren’t too sure, or not too thrilled about doing so?

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That’s Why They Call It Faith

Where in the world did summer go?

And what happened to my beach time (that I never actually got)? Did anyone else blink and think those two brief months of sunny reprieve from homework wars and carpool running ended way too soon?  If life for you is like mine, your kids are starting back to school if they haven’t already, and your family’s pace has taken on Nascar qualities as classes and Bible studies and activities at church get going and all of the fall school and after-school activites and team practices are now updated on the almost-already full calendar. I’m tired just writing that.

A few weeks ago I started a study of Proverbs 31 with a group of precious ladies from my church. You may have read my book, My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife. I’ve had a lot of requests to write a Bible study with it, so if you’ve been one of those, you may be happy to know that I’m working on it! This group, as I’ve told them, are my guinea pigs – and it’s been fun to walk through this passage of scripture with different eyes than I might have had back when I was living out and writing about my experiment with “Martha 31.”

I love the ladies in our class because while there may be differences among us – some are older and have been married a long time (our “most seasoned” wife has celebrated 48 years with her hubby!) and some are starting out (a newlywed who just got married in May). Some women would say their marriages aren’t in a great season right now while others feel pretty good about where their relationships are. Some work a job outside the home, some stay more than busy working the jobs they have at home. Some have younger children, some have kids who’ve already left the nest and have families of their own. There’s a lot of differences.

But there are also similarities. We want to be better than we are as wives and moms… as WOMEN. We crave a closer relationship with God.  We wish we felt more confident in what we’re doing. We wish we didn’t always feel so much like failures (even when no one else is insinuating that we are). We wish we didn’t always feel so tired.

Any heads nodding out there? Been there, ever?

Running on Empty?

There are just days where you feel weary. Maybe you did all you could to help get your family off to a great start this week – and NOTHING has gone the way you wanted it too – and NO ONE has even seemed to notice what you HAVE actually done. Maybe you’ve been running and doing so much for others, that you’ve had no time for yourself – not even a few minutes to spend with God. You feel a little like when you’re driving and you notice the gas gauge is screaming Empty – and your GPS tells you there is no gas station… um, anywhere.

So. Tired. So. Empty. So. WORN. OUT.

I don’t know about you, but the longer I go feeling physically and emotionally tired, the easier it is to add a spiritual weariness to that list too. Maybe you start wondering – is God really there? Does He see what I’m dealing with right now? Does He know how I’m feeling? And if yes, why doesn’t He do something about it?

“Because of the LORD’s faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness! I say: The LORD is my portion, therefore I will put my hope in Him.” ~ Lamentations 3:22-24

This is probably the most well-known and most quoted few verses we find in the book of Lamentations. It’s a beautiful reminder of how God is faithful.  I’ve thought about these words when I’ve seen a pretty sunrise or sunset, or I’ve had a weary day and I’m about to lay my head on the pillow and I whisper a silent prayer of hope that tomorrow will be a whole lot better. But sometimes these words are easier to read than maybe believe, especially when we’re having trouble thinking we will even MAKE IT to another morning. I wonder if this passage has been quoted so much, that we don’t always think about what these verses are actually saying.

Recently, though, I read these verses again as I was reading through the book of Lamentations, following what I’d read in Jeremiah, and it’s taken on new meaning for me, maybe some new perspective.

Reading through the Major and Minor Prophets of the Old Testament is NOT easy reading, by the way. There’s a whole lot more WOEs happening in these pages than WOOHs – right? Calls for repentance, warnings of God’s judgement, pleas for God’s people to FINALLY listen and heed. We’re not talking about the Israelites escaping Egypt and making their way to the Promised Land, or David defeating the giant Goliath, or   one of the other exciting stories we read as we see God give victories to His people.

Not Recommended Reading for Bedtime

No, victory doesn’t exist in the pages of Jeremiah and Lamentations. Grief does. Desolation and destruction. Heartache and heartbreak. Misery and loneliness as God’s people live out the consequences of their sin.

Just for a little background - as king after king both in Judah and Israel refused to follow God’s commands, eventually God let go. Eventually He turned away. In Jeremiah 52:3, we read that “Because of the LORD’s anger, it came to the point in Jerusalem and Judah that He finally banished them from His presence.”

It wasn’t long after that when Babylon started their attack. For almost two years, Jerusalem was under siege, and by the time the dust settled, there was nothing left. Thousands were taken captive, the temple built by Solomon now just rubble. Those who were left were left with nothing. No food, no help, not a whole lot of hope.

Can you feel the desperation?

Where’s the help when you need it?

Flipping back over to Lamentations, we read that the dead were lying out in the streets (2:21), children were starving because there was nothing to eat (2:19) and parents were EATING their babies. Can you imagine the horror of a mother being faced with that choice? There was no Salvation Army or Red Cross showing up before things got too bad.The situation was horrible. Desperate, hard, life or death choices, moment by moment.

Jeremiah, God’s prophet, the man who had tried following what God asked of him since he was young, despite his reservations and sometimes outright objections – he also had to live through that. He had to watch the suffering, and no doubt, suffered along with the others. He felt the desperation. He struggled through the famine, and the stress and the seemingly endless days of “will this ever get better?” He hurt to the point where he could say “I have forgotten what happiness is” (Lam 3:17).

But look at what Jeremiah goes on to say… despite remembering and living through “affliction, homelessness, wormwood (another word for bitterness or grief), and poison” (Lam 3:19), and fighting depression… he uses the word YET.

“YET I call this to mind, and THEREFORE I have hope:” (emphasis added)

Hold up a second – wait just a minute – things may be REALLY bad – but I know there is something better…

“BECAUSE of the LORD’s FAITHFUL LOVE we DO NOT PERISH, for His MERCIES never end. They are NEW every morning; GREAT is Your FAITHFULNESS!” (emphasis added)

How could Jeremiah talk about God’s faithful love in circumstances like the ones he and the rest of his people were living in? How could he think about God’s mercies at a time like that? God’s faithfulness??

How are you able to think about God’s faithfulness when you’re walking through something heartbreaking? A death of a child? A death of a marriage? A financial crisis? A health scare? A relationship challenged by betrayal? Is God faithful? Even at times like these?

Why is Jeremiah able to see God’s faithfulness even in famine and living conditions that could only be described as futile?

Because of what he says in 3:24 – “I say, the LORD is my PORTION, therefore I WILL PUT my HOPE in Him.” (Emphasis added).

I am not starving. I am not homeless. I have a roof over my head and a pantry full of food. Jeremiah was living in a time where he didn’t have a roof over his head, and there were no portions of food – limited or otherwise – being shared or given. There were no portions of anything. YET (love that word) – Jeremiah knew and saw that God was his portion. God was what he needed. God was faithful and would meet his needs. Not his wants – not his desires for his idea of comfort and wishes for more – but his needs.

Jeremiah recognized God’s faithfulness because he realized he was still alive. Because where there is life, there is hope. And when we see God, we can see hope.

There have been seasons in my life, even recently, where I’ve had to walk through unexpected and hard circumstances where I feel a bit like Jeremiah, overwhelmed with an ache in my heart and a struggle in my soul and I’m left crying out to God, wondering if the relief or the solution or the happier days will ever come.

You may be there too.

Can I share with you friend, how I am getting through it?

I remember that God is faithful. And even when He allows struggles and hurts to happen in our lives, He has a plan and a purpose for those struggles. For those hurts. No, it doesn’t always make sense to us. No, it’s not even always something we can eventually see the “brighter side” of. But, I have seen enough of God’s goodness and good in my life to know He is faithful even in the ugly parts of my life. Even in the struggles. Even in the hard.

And that’s why they call it faith.

I will trust what His Word says. I will “call this to mind” and “therefore have hope”: “The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him.” (Lam 3:25)

I may not be able to see God like I see my husband or my son when we sit across from each other at breakfast, I may not be able to pick up the phone and hear His audible voice on the other end like I do when I talk to one of my best friends – but I know He’s with me. I know He hasn’t abandoned me. I know what He’s done in my life and what He continues to do. I’m grateful for what He gives me, and I’m grateful for any moment where He is willing to use me. I look at Jeremiah’s story and I see a man who struggled with the circumstances and situations he was facing. But I also see a man determined to stand upright and look to God for his strength. That’s my prayer as well.

People aren’t interested in how you respond when life is good. They want to know how you respond when life isn’t.

Want to go deeper in your faith? If you’re a military wife, I invite you to read my book GOD Strong: A Military Wife’s Spiritual Survival Guide. And for everyone, let me invite you to pre-order my new book that releases in October, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret. Both books are available for purchase in my online store or anywhere books are sold.

Need to grow stronger in your marriage? Subscribe to my blog and you’ll receive a free copy of my devotional, 3o Days to Love HIS Way. 

Join the Launch Team for How Can I Possibly Forgive

It’s almost time!

In less than 5 short weeks, my new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? Rescuing Your Heart from Resentment and Regret, releases, and I’m excited to share with you what I’ve learned about this hard but important topic.

One thing I can tell you with confidence – what distracts our hearts, distracts our souls and the hurts and resentments that happen from hard situations or relationships with friends or family can be the very walls preventing us from fully experiencing the kind of relationship God wants with us.

Maybe you’ve been there too – or you have friends or loved ones in your life who’ve let bitterness consume them and you know that if they could just let go of that hurt, they would be completely different people.

Forgiveness ISN’T easy. But it IS possible, and it’s possible when we realize how much God has forgiven when it comes to us.

Join the Team

If you love to read, if you love talking about books with your friends, and if you agree that forgiveness is a topic more of us need to think about and look to God to help us with – then I need your help! We are looking for a select number of ENTHUSIASTIC, FACEBOOK and PINTEREST-CRAZY, GOD-LOVING and MAMA-BLOGGING WOMEN who want to help spread the word about the new book. But we’re only taking applications until Thursday, Sept. 4.

So here’s what I need you to do: read through the info below, fill out, and submit the form. Then COMMENT on my Facebook Wall or tag me on Twitter with this message – “I’ve signed up to join the Launch Team for Sara Horn’s new book, How Can I Possibly Forgive? #howcanIforgive“ – and you’ll be entered automatically to win a free signed copy of the book when it releases- whether you’re chosen for the team or not!

What You Receive as a Launch Team Member

A free, electronic review copy of the book in advance of the October 1 publication date
A 2-min exclusive welcome video from me in your inbox
Exclusive access to myself and other team members in a private Facebook group
A special 30-minute google hangout session with me prior to the book launch
A special thank you with a link to your blog or website on my blog
A personalized, signed copy of How Can I Possibly Forgive
20 beautiful quoteables from the book to share on your blog and social media (like the one below!)



Launch Team Member Requirements

Write a brief book review on Amazon and other e-tailer sites the week of October 1
Share the quoteable graphics on designated days (and other days too!) and help spread the word about the book during the week of October 1
Help brainstorm ideas with other launch team members on other ways to help build awareness and excitement for the book’s release

That’s it! Ready to be part of an exciting few weeks! Fill out the form below. My team and I can’t wait to hear from you!

Your Contact Information





First Name
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First



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Your Blog/Website








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Mali
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Sudan
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Sweden
Switzerland
Syria
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Tonga
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Uganda
Ukraine
United Arab Emirates
United Kingdom
United States
Uruguay
Uzbekistan
Vanuatu
Vatican City
Venezuela
Vietnam
Yemen
Zambia
Zimbabwe






Which of Sara's books have you read? (Check all that apply)


A Greater Freedom (with Oliver North)
GOD Strong: A Military Wife's Spiritual Survival Guide
Tour of Duty: Preparing Our Hearts for Deployment
My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife
My So-Called Life as a Submissive Wife
None of the above





Have you served on one of Sara's previous launch teams?


Yes
No





What's your favorite book that Sara's written and why?










Your Social Media Networks


Select the social media accounts you CURRENTLY use. Include web addresses/usernames when possible.


I use the following social media accounts:
*

Facebook
GoodReads
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LinkedIn
Pinterest
Twitter
Tumblr
YouTube





If you own a public Facebook page (NOT a personal profile), list address here:








Are you the moderator or member of any private Facebook groups/online forums you would share the book with? List here.









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Pinterest address/username:








Twitter address/username:








Tumblr address/username:








YouTube.com address/channel









Share the Love


Do you belong to a church or other local organization (example: MOPS) with an active women's ministry or Bible study group? Share their contact information here, and we will send them a free copy of How Can I Possibly Forgive (while supplies last) with an opportunity to purchase books for their group at a significant discount.


Name of Church/Organization









Contact Name and Title









Mailing Address









Address Line 2









City









State





AL
AK
AR
AZ
CA
CO
CT
DE
DC
FL
GA
HI
ID
IL
IN
IA
KS
KY
LA
ME
MH
MD
MA
MI
MN
MS
MO
MT
NE
NV
NH
NJ
NM
NY
NC
ND
OH
OK
OR
PA
RI
SC
SD
TN
TX
UT
VT
VA
WA
WV
WI
WY






Postal Code









Country





Afghanistan
Albania
Algeria
American Samoa
Andorra
Angola
Anguilla
Antarctica
Antigua and Barbuda
Argentina
Armenia
Aruba
Australia
Austria
Azerbaijan
Bahamas
Bahrain
Bangladesh
Barbados
Belarus
Belgium
Belize
Benin
Bermuda
Bhutan
Bolivia
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Botswana
Bouvet Island
Brazil
British Indian Ocean Territory
Brunei
Bulgaria
Burkina Faso
Burundi
Cambodia
Cameroon
Canada
Cape Verde
Cayman Islands
Central African Republic
Chad
Chile
China
Christmas Island
Cocos (Keeling) Islands
Colombia
Comoros
Congo
Cook Islands
Costa Rica
Côte d'Ivoire
Croatia (Hrvatska)
Cuba
Cyprus
Czech Republic
Congo (DRC)
Denmark
Djibouti
Dominica
Dominican Republic
East Timor
Ecuador
Egypt
El Salvador
Equatorial Guinea
Eritrea
Estonia
Ethiopia
Falkland Islands (Islas Malvinas)
Faroe Islands
Fiji Islands
Finland
France
French Guiana
French Polynesia
French Southern and Antarctic Lands
Gabon
Gambia
Georgia
Germany
Ghana
Gibraltar
Greece
Greenland
Grenada
Guadeloupe
Guam
Guatemala
Guinea
Guinea-Bissau
Guyana
Haiti
Honduras
Hong Kong SAR
Hungary
Iceland
India
Indonesia
Iran
Iraq
Ireland
Israel
Italy
Jamaica
Japan
Jordan
Kazakhstan
Kenya
Kiribati
Korea
Kuwait
Kyrgyzstan
Laos
Latvia
Lebanon
Lesotho
Liberia
Libya
Liechtenstein
Lithuania
Luxembourg
Macao SAR
Macedonia, Former Yugoslav Republic of
Madagascar
Malawi
Malaysia
Maldives
Mali
Malta
Marshall Islands
Martinique
Mauritania
Mauritius
Mayotte
Mexico
Micronesia
Moldova
Monaco
Mongolia
Montserrat
Morocco
Mozambique
Myanmar
Namibia
Nauru
Nepal
Netherlands
New Zealand
Nicaragua
Niger
Nigeria
Norway
Oman
Pakistan
Palau
Palestine
Panama
Papua New Guinea
Paraguay
Peru
Philippines
Poland
Portugal
Puerto Rico
Qatar
Romania
Russia
Rwanda
Saint Kitts and Nevis
Saint Lucia
Saint Vincent and the Grenadines
Samoa
San Marino
Sao Tome and Principe
Saudi Arabia
Senegal
Serbia and Montenegro
Seychelles
Sierra Leone
Singapore
Slovakia
Slovenia
Solomon Islands
Somalia
South Africa
Spain
Sri Lanka
Sudan
Suriname
Swaziland
Sweden
Switzerland
Syria
Taiwan
Tajikistan
Tanzania
Thailand
Togo
Tonga
Trinidad and Tobago
Tunisia
Turkey
Turkmenistan
Tuvalu
Uganda
Ukraine
United Arab Emirates
United Kingdom
United States
Uruguay
Uzbekistan
Vanuatu
Vatican City
Venezuela
Vietnam
Yemen
Zambia
Zimbabwe