Garret Kramer's Blog, page 3

Inducing Independence

A few mornings ago, while out on my weekly walk in nature, I noticed something interesting yet heartbreaking. A woman was attempting to teach her young son independence.

Her behavior was innocent, but I’ve seen this picture before: Little boy crying and his mother slowly backing away in a noble attempt to impart resilience, mental toughness, or tough love. And as she did, he cried more and more. It harkened me back to my first summer at overnight camp, when, as a mere second grader, I cried myself to sleep for two straight months.

But why? Why would this well-intentioned mother, like my father when I young, put her son through such a forced separation?

The answer is that our culture conditions us to think that inducing independence, at all ages and in all walks of life, is necessary. But I promise you it is not.

In fact, attempting to teach children or anyone independence is among the most perilous of mistakes because, from an absolute perspective, there’s no such thing as independence.

That’s the reason this youngster was vigorously crying. Children don’t see separation. They’re born knowing that we share a Being; that nothing exists apart from experience; that there are no such things as “me” and “not me.” Thus, when programmed to be who they are not (independent or separate), children often spend much of their lives coping—turning to substances, relationships, practices, states of mind, or activities—in a debilitating quest to overcome insecurity and find their way home to the one Being we share. On the contrary, it’s actually the opposite path that spawns the most secure and resilient children and adults. Fortifying that we are not separate is what brings out our best. It’s what allows the true Self to rest peacefully and purposefully as itself.

Remember: Programming someone to be who they can never truly be—a separate entity—is the source of self-doubt and the need to cope. Knowing we’re all images of a single Being, and reinforcing this fundamental fact, is the essence of Love.

Thank you for reading,


Garret

The Research Requirement

Research. We seem to crave it. We seem to require it for validation. In fact, absent of research, we’re taught to turn away from even the most intriguing ideas, concepts, or models.

But here’s the thing regarding research we tend to overlook: Research merely tells us how something seems to work. It does not tell us how something actually works.

To illustrate, research indicating that the act of meditation leads to the state of meditation 85 percent of the time does not prove the efficiency of the act of meditation. It proves the inefficiency of it. Why? Because if the act caused the state, it would happen 100 percent of the time. So, while it seems as if research shows that most of the time the act of meditation causes the state of meditation, it actually shows that it never causes it.

More important, any time you try to prove cause and effect—the aim of research—what you’re essentially doing is corroborating the greatest of cultural misunderstandings: separation, duality, inequality, or the presumption that we are not a single Being. That is, in order for one thing to cause another, there must be separation; there must be two. So, with the best of intentions, many are trying to use research (prove cause and effect) to fix the dreads of humanity (e.g., to end climate change, to cure mental illness, to eliminate conflict). But they’re basically doing the opposite. They’re fortifying the illusion of separation—which is the foundation of the dreads they’re attempting to fix.

To be clear, I’m not saying that research is wrong; it has some proper applications. In sport or in certain aspects of medicine, for instance. But bottom line? It cannot prove what’s real or what’s true. In fact, our culture has been research-driven for as long as anyone can remember. Are we at peace? In love? Free? Why, then, keep looking in a faulty direction?

Research requires a look outside. The word is even derived from the Middle French “recherche,” which means “to go about seeking.” It’s an exploration into the illusory and bottomless world of mind and matter.

Rather, look inside. Explore what cannot be seen. What does not seem real. What cannot be proven. What requires no seeking.

Explore the nature of Consciousness, the true Self, or the one Being we share.

Answers—Peace, Love, and Freedom—found nowhere but there.

Inward and up,


Garret

Silencing Ego

This week, a short but essential post.

Consider these two complementary spiritual edicts, both of which I’ve mentioned before:

1. The only true teacher is stillness.

2. The ego is not an entity; it’s an activity or agency of Consciousness.

Now, a direct question:

When will you learn that any activity (even a so-called productive one such as working hard, serving others, sticking to  process, choosing good thoughts, controlling what you can control, taking personal responsibility, communicating clearly, or building a team culture), strategically taken for the purpose of another activity (such as making money, gaining clients, feeling good, fortifying a relationship, coming together, or winning a championship), is nothing more than an outward step away from Source? And this outward step promotes another outward step and another and another.

Regrettably, what gets overlooked is these outward steps are how the activity of ego sustains itself. The ego having its way. They’re a perpetual wild-goose chase of replacing one activity with another in order to cope with, or distract from, the stress that this very misunderstanding—that the ego is an actual thing that can be obliterated through more activity—is creating in the first place.

On the contrary:

To end this exhausting cycle, you must rob the ego of its fuel supply. This will not be accomplished by distancing yourself from who you are through the type of activities mentioned above. It’s accomplished by going right to the heart of who you are. By turning your attention inward.

That is, since there’s no actual step toward true nature—toward Source, the true Self, or Consciousness—an inward exploration forces the ego out of activity and into quiet; into stillness. Like a cloud dissolving into the sky, the ego then has no choice but to dissolve back from where it came. Now you are home. Answers abound. Actions are instinctive. Energy is conserved. You are free.

You and your partner, family, or team have tried and tried the exhaustive search outward. Isn’t it time to stay put? To be still? To be the most passionate, purposeful, powerful, productive, and loving you? To be who you truly are?

The effortless answer: Yes.

Inward and up,


Garret

 

The Seamless Nature of Experience

Just for a second, if possible, be open to what I’m about to say. Because when it comes to perception, or the nature of experience and its implications in the world of form, this post might surprise you. It might challenge your belief system or what you know to be true. You might even think me nuts. Ready? Here goes:

From a young age, we’re taught that separateness, or clear lines of distinction, represents reality. Perception, that is, consists of separate selves and separate objects. Human beings exist separate from each other; trees exist separate from the rest of nature; clouds exist separate from the sky; all things exist separate from all other things.

But what if the opposite were true?

What if the foundation of perception is a unified and infinite canvas with no distinctions (imagine the photo of a landscape becoming blurry to the point of nothingness)? What if reality is fundamentally indivisible, complete, whole, and abundant? What if separation or duality is no more than a culturally conditioned presumption? What if everyone and every object were actually one?

What a different world it would be.

Oh, I know, it’s nearly impossible to grasp. The intellect and the conditioning to which it’s prone fully overwhelm us. But, still, let’s explore a bit further:

What if, since the human mind cannot grasp the seamless intimacy of experience, it is Consciousness or God that brings all objects into apparent form? What if Consciousness vibrates, contracts, and localizes within its infinite canvas, generating the apparent lines of distinction we see? What if separate objects don’t conceal Consciousness, but essentially reveal it?

Now that would explain, at least to me, why perception appears to be something it’s not. In fact, without this contraction of Consciousness, there’d be no manifestation at all. And as you know, manifestation is glorious; its content—human beings, trees, clouds, and the rest—is magnificent. But manifestation has also come at a heavy cost. The vast majority of us have taken these lines of distinction as genuine. Rather than mere images made of Consciousness, we’ve presumed objects to be important and valuable entities made of matter. We’ve succumbed to the appearance, or illusion, of duality. And thus, isolationism—greed or materialism—is ruling the day.

However, this will only be the case until the day it is not.

In other words, if my suggestion above is accurate (and, to be clear, many have made similar suggestions), indeed what a different world it would be. Separation, division, and all notion of inequality would then be untrue. Nature would remain unscathed. Money, food, and water would be amply distributed. Even more vital, knowing we share a Being—knowing that lines of distinction are illusory; knowing these lines are merely brought into temporary focus for the benefit of manifestation; knowing we’re one—is the sole source of moral behavior. The sole source of what is truly real: peace, harmony, equality, freedom, and love.

Lastly, if you’re so inclined, try on for size this exercise I use with teams, organizations, audiences, and performers:

From where you sit or stand right now, look outward and focus super hard on objects. Find lines of distinction. Divide, separate, judge. Establish duality, materialistic preference, or a hierarchy in your mind.

But then, don’t. Look out and simply see. Just see. Just perceive. Just have an experience. Allow the seamless or indivisible nature of perception to take you where it will. Allow the transparency, and thus intimacy, of all things to completely consume you.

Now, which perspective is real? Which perspective is true? Not sure? You’ll know it, feel it, in the experience. The heart over the head. Undeniably, when we experience an unlimited, amalgamated, or borderless canvas, only Love remains. We cease searching for ourselves, for our identity, in objects, others, or anything from the world of form—as the world of form ceases to exist.

Now we are free.

—

What do you say? Rather than the current objective or materialistic model, perhaps a Consciousness-only model is worth some serious consideration.

Thank you for being open to it. Thank you for considering. Thank you for reading this post.

Garret

Are You Struggling?

Struggling? We all do, however . . .

Before you take the plunge into exploring thought in order to fix or cope with your struggle, consider this question: Is the substance of thought different than the infinite and eternal space in which thought appears and disappears? If yes, take the plunge. If no, rather than explore what appears and disappears (thought), explore what thought is made of. Explore what always stays the same and can never leave you.

Before you take the plunge into exploring feelings to cope with your struggle, consider this question: Is the substance of feelings different than the infinite and eternal space in which feelings appear and disappear? If yes, take the plunge. If no, rather than explore what appears and disappears (feelings), explore what feelings are made of. Explore what always stays the same and can never leave you.

Before you take the plunge into exploring mind, matter, or any object to cope with your struggle, consider this question: Is the substance of objects different than the infinite and eternal space in which objects appear and disappear? If yes, take the plunge. If no, rather than explore what appears and disappears (objects), explore what objects are made of. Explore what always stays the same and can never leave you.

Before you take the plunge into exploring life situations, including relationships, to cope with your struggle, consider this question: Is the substance of situations different than the infinite and eternal space in which they appear and disappear? If yes, take the plunge. If no, rather than explore what appears and disappears (situations), explore what situations are made of. Explore what always stays the same and can never leave you.

Sorry to drone on, but you get the picture.

Why explore what comes and goes within?

Why explore the content rather than its substance?

Why explore what is not essential?

Rather: Explore you. Who are YOU?

Not thought, not feelings, not an object, not a relationship or any situation.

Thought, feelings, objects, and situations appear in Consciousness, are made of Consciousness, and disappear back into Consciousness.

Are you struggling (or even if you’re not)?

Explore the nature of Consciousness—i.e., the true Self or God’s infinite Being.

Because Consciousness is YOU.

Thanks for reading,


Garret

 

 

 

The Case Against Oneness

The other day, a reader asked me the following question:

“Why, Garret, did the early spiritual teachers call the study of true nature Non-duality as opposed to Oneness?”

Cool question. And it turns out there’s a fairly obvious reason, and one that’s not so obvious. Both reasons are informative and important to consider. Let’s start with the obvious.

A noun ending in the suffix “-ness” means the state of being or becoming the original adjective. Happiness, for example, literally means the state of being or becoming happy. Oneness, then, means the state of being or becoming one. And there lies the reason: The true Self (i.e., Consciousness, Love, God’s infinite Being) never exists as two. As such, it can never become one. It’s already one, non-dual, or not two. In other words, who you truly are is infinitely whole. Who you are is all there is. And what is whole or all there is can never become one with, or connect to, something or someone else. Why? Because there is no something or someone else.

Now for the not so obvious (which could be considered a continuation of the first reason).

To the separate or personal self we often think ourselves to be, experience is composed of distinct objects, others, and events. But, as discussed in past articles, the separate self’s point of view is imagined (the separate self is merely an image made of and appearing within the true Self or Consciousness). On the contrary, to the true Self—the only point of view that’s real—there is only itself. To the true Self, there are no actual distinctions. This is why we say, “Consciousness knows only Consciousness,” “Love knows everything and everyone as Love,” and why Jesus said, “I and my father are one.” In short, there’s not a thing called Oneness because the concept of separateness only exists from the point of view of the imaginary separate self. And if separateness is imagined, then Oneness, or two separate things becoming one, is too.

One last thing about the use of the word “Non-duality” over the word “Oneness.” To be fair, neither word is perfect. Both try to capture the essence of experience. Non-duality, though, is simply a better description of the indescribable, breathtaking, and timeless glimpse into the indivisible nature of who we truly are. My simple hope is that this article, this “case against” Oneness, might ease the burden of trying to establish a relationship with, trying to understand the perspective of, or trying to connect to what doesn’t fundamentally exist.

And make a bit more obvious the effortlessness and ease of the one Being we share.

Inward and up,

Garret

Father, Son, and Everyone

As a young man, I marveled that throughout the seemingly thousands of times my father criticized me, he always appeared to be talking about himself. For a good part of my life, I also wondered why.

Now I know: The world we see is a reflection of the limitations inherent in us.

But this is only the case, until it’s not.

Here’s what I mean: Everyone adopts, to a certain degree, the fundamental or culturally conditioned presumption that duality is real—that mind and matter, subject and object, or he or she and everything else are separate or distinct. That experience is divided into what is me (a finite mind and body) and what is not me (everyone and everything else). Yet at some point, be it right now, in a year, twenty years, or when death is near, we sense something different. We no longer feel or recognize ourselves as separate. Thus, to a certain extent, we’re no longer influenced by the belief in a separate self, separate world, separate objects, separate others, or even a separate God.

In other words, when an apparently separate self turns the same knowing through which it knows objects inward, when it takes a real look at itself, limitations vanish and true nature or a shared Consciousness is revealed. Often, this inquiry is prompted through the encouragement, guidance, or mere presence of a teacher, loved one, or friend. And it inspires such questions as: Who am I? Within who do thoughts, feelings, and perceptions appear and disappear? Who is it that’s aware of thoughts, feelings, and perceptions? Can who I am be tarnished by thoughts, feelings, and perceptions?

In fact, it is this self-inquiry that leads to the recognition that we are not a limited mind and body, but rather the immortal container, Consciousness, in which everything takes place. And when this happens, all objects and others are divested of their apparent limitations, too.

And the so-called practical perk of this recognition?

A world seen is still a reflection. But not of separation, isolation, insecurity, and lack (or judgment, criticism, or ridicule)—but of Love. What we see is forever informed by the one Being we share.

This is the reason I present these weekly articles. In a world seemingly divided, my hope is that their presence guides you, me, and my father—at this late and trying stage of his life—inward toward Source’s pathless path. That we’ll wake up to who we truly are: a shared, infinite, and eternal Consciousness. That we’ll see that the separate selves we’re conditioned to be are merely objectifications of the only Self there is. That, ultimately, we’ll know nothing but one. Nothing but Peace. Nothing but Love.

No doubt, we’re ready.

Inward and up,

Garret

 

 

 

 

Free Will and Sydney Banks

Note: Sydney Banks, for those of you who don’t know, is the teacher whose early work inspired much of my teaching, including what you read here each week. The post that follows stems from some confusion around Syd’s work regarding free will, and how I see this important concept. I hope you find it helpful. G

—

As a teacher, I’m not interested in sharing how things appear. I’m interested in exploring and then sharing, to the best of my ability, how things are. I’m not interested in standing pat. I’m interested in a continued exploration and a further stripping away. I’m not interested in evolution. I’m interested in involution, in returning as close to Source as the mind can take me.

And here’s where free will and Syd Banks come in.

My understanding of Syd was that he strongly encouraged further exploration. He taught, and rightly so, from what his felt experience was telling him and where it was taking him. And because self-exploration represents an endless journey inward—as opposed to an outward search into the personal, or into what the activity of ego appears to be capable of or responsible for—my own exploration has naturally taken me away from the concept of personal choice, burden, or free will.

In other words, further exploration has revealed that who we are is Freedom itself. Freedom is at the heart of our very true nature. And thus, since our lives are free, rather than mechanical or deterministic, it’s perfectly normal to feel as though we’re the ones freely making choices. This is not wrong. To the contrary, freedom echoing in our minds is a wonderful expression of what we all hold dear. Where it gets sticky, however, is examining or trying to exercise the concept of free will as opposed to taking a genuine look at who we are, what life is, and where this sense of freedom actually springs from.

Along those lines, I even stumbled upon this little ditty from Syd himself:

“Now, we all have what is called a free will and a free mind (note, he says, ‘what is CALLED a free will and a free mind.’). But there’s a little trick to this free will and free mind because this free will and free mind is what holds you prisoner. It’s what keeps you in hell. It’s what keeps you in ignorance because you have ‘chosen’ to use your own free will in this game of life, this illusion, instead of submitting this so-called ‘free’ will to the will of God. Because the will of God, in actual fact, is the only will that exists.”

Syd was simply reminding us that freedom isn’t personal. It would only be experienced upon a return, a “submitting,” to true nature—or God’s infinite Being.

Finally, as a result of this further exploration, it no longer adds up to me that a thought popping into the mind (thought #1) happens indiscriminately, yet the choice or responsibility of acting on thought #1 (thought #2) is in our control. As Syd taught, it all works the same way. All choices present themselves in the form of a thought popping into the mind. In fact, the notion that we have any power to choose which thought to follow is just another indiscriminate thought.

If you disagree with what you’ve just read, all good. The only thing I’d suggest is this: Do not take my words or the words of Syd or anyone as gospel. Go explore for yourself. What you’re reading here is a current perspective that mustn’t be turned into a belief. Sadly, Syd’s writings, which have been memorialized and held in place, have become a belief.

Again, why not look a little further?

Thank you for reading,

Garret

Where Thoughts Appear

This week, let’s begin with perhaps an unusual question:

Where, or within what, do your thoughts—and while we’re it, your sensations and perceptions—appear?

If you say within the physical or personal you (your mind, gut, or simply your body), fair enough, but how do you know this to be true? Have you ever found a thought in your mind? A sensation in your gut? A perception in your body? No. A body is itself a thought, or a sensation, and a thought cannot appear within another thought.

So, where do thoughts appear?

Hard to answer, isn’t it? Reason being, where thoughts appear has no objective qualities. Thus, it’s impossible for your mind to pinpoint or access it.

But you can consider this:

Where thoughts appear, and disappear too, is by nature devoid of thoughts. Like the blue of the sky is, by nature, devoid of clouds, birds, planes, lightening, or storms—and is in fact immune to these apparent objects—where thoughts appear is immune to any and all thoughts which move through it.

Let’s follow this further with another question:

Why is it important to know that where thoughts, sensations, and perceptions appear is immune to, and cannot be tarnished by, thoughts, sensations, and perceptions?

Simple. All of us have spent the good part of our lives tending to, managing, or trying to change what is meant to come and go in the first place. So much so that we’ve never even considered that where thoughts appear is not a mind or body and, as such, does not share the destiny of a mind or body. In other words, in our focus on cognitive fixes, we’ve completely overlooked that thoughts, sensations, perceptions, objects, and images (minds and bodies included) are transient, while where they appear and disappear is resilient, enduring, or permanent.

So, again, where do thoughts appear?

To answer, let’s give it a name. Thoughts appear within You. Or better yet, Us. Other names we give to the unlimited space are Consciousness, Awareness, the true Self, or God’s infinite Being.

Whatever name you choose, or no name at all, it’s just wonderful to know that where thoughts, or even storms, appear remains unaffected by whatever comes and goes within it.

You are the deep blue sky. You are that space. Whole, pure, unscathed, come what may—forever.

Inward and up,

Garret

Don’t Chase

Ever notice that so-called good things—Love, Peace, Happiness—tend to come to you or fall into your lap, while the chase for them tends to leave you barren, frustrated, and exhausted?

There’s good reason for this. In fact, many years ago, when I was an ice hockey forward (whose role was to score), my father used to leave me notes demonstrating this interesting phenomenon. He’d say, “Now, don’t go crashing into the pile around the net. Go soft to the pile and allow the puck to pop out to you.”

And today, I provide my daughter (a field hockey scorer) with the same type of reminder, sometimes with the following twist:

“Who you are is not the perpetual activity of chasing, seeking, or resisting. Who you are will never yearn to move toward objects and things. Rather, who you are is the eternal state of being tranquil, whole, or still. Objects and things—that which is not tranquil, whole, or still—will move toward and dissolve into you. So, kid, just be you. The game will come to you. The true You.”

And here you have the reason why “good things” can only come to us, we cannot go to them:

The true Self is permanently present; it is absent of lack; it never waivers. It, therefore, cannot chase. On the other hand, acting from insecurity, lack, desperation, or chasing? That’s the work of who you are not: the separate self or ego. The separate self needs objects and things to validate its apparent existence. That’s why it’s drawn toward them. But because the separate self, like objects and things, doesn’t actually exist (it’s who we are not), this is always a foolhardy or dog-chasing-tail type of quest.

Don’t chase. Or, as my father would say, “crash into the pile.” Do the opposite of what you think the urge is telling you. Go soft. My bet is that both the true Self (Love, Peace, and Happiness) and the puck will end up on your stick in no time.

Inward and up,


Garret