Roxanne Roberts's Blog, page 2

Are you waiting for the perfect time?

There are a lot of things I just don't start at times, reason being? Well, I'm waiting for the perfect time, I'm waiting for all of the obstacles in my way to be cleared, and I'm waiting until I can come up with no more objections........

You know the end of that story right? Yep...those things...they don't ever get done.

Someone told me once that I would need several life times in order to do all of the things I want to get done and to pursue all of the things I am interested in...perhaps that's true...but I think I have found the key to getting it all done in this life time with plenty of time to think up other things to do on the way....

You want to know what it is?

I no longer wait.

There IS no such thing as the "perfect time" other than right now!  So, there is no waiting, I don't wait for all the obstacles to be removed, for the path to be clear, for the problems to be solved and all of the pros and cons discussed...not me. I dive in head first, I follow my path, my heart, my impulses and my team and just go, go, go while the impulse has a hold of me. I create, I make, I do, i decide and I just keep on going until the job is done.

While doing this, running headlong, most of the things I saw as obstacles before i began...well they turned out just to be excuses, because when I got to them, most of them were no longer there.

Often, if we feel like we need to wait for the perfect time, it means that our "brain" is trying to keep us locked in our comfort zone, because it thinks it's safer...it might be, but without jumping in, there is no great gain either.

So don't wait, leap in, follow the impulse, walk your path...no, scratch that, RUN, and have a magical journey.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

You're allowed to have bad days

One of the things I have remembered recently is to allow myself to feel how I feel no matter how that may be.

Choosing a path of love and forgiveness in all things has it's "moments"; moments where it's lonely, moments where it's frustrating, moments where playing by the rules (the rules of our own personal integrity and therefore our own making) is difficult and seems unjust, moments where it seems to be a disadvantage or weakness for a moment or two....oh yes...it can be all of these things, just as any other path can be.

What I reminded myself of today, was that having one of these moments does not mean I am failing at, or lacking in anything. It means I am human, and that while I share the very nature and love of the divine, I am also subject to these moments that seem to have no understanding and no purpose. At these times, I choose to just let the feelings run their course. Sometimes this means phoning a friend, or sharing those thoughts and moments (although I do try to be cautious about sharing these moments who love and support me and are happy just to hear me out) or to ask for help in passing through these moments.

I seek solace often in the company of nature, whether through the soothing energy of the sea, the majestic patience of old forest trees, or the young and energetic comfort of my veggie garden, nature is a magnificent healer, and a lovely place to convalesce so to speak.

I think it is important to step away from judging myself when I have a "moment" like this, to not feel I am failing or taking a step backwards or in any other way view this experience as a negative thing. It just is...it is just me in this moment. I also see no point in trying to suppress or hide these moments from myself either (although naturally I attempt to ensure others aren't impacted).

I guess what I am attempting to say is that it is REALLY OK to have a bad day...even a few in a row if need be *wry smile* sometimes, walking away from these moments I come to a fuller understanding of who I am, what may be troubling me, and the direction I would like to choose to avoid another moment like this that is the same...at this point, having this moment becomes a gift, another skill to add to my healing tool kit.

Give yourself permission to feel in whatever way you feel. It's not wrong, or right, it just is ...

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Persistance

One of the key factors I recognised on my unplanned "sabbatical" has been the power in persistence.

Not one of the people seen as achieving all of their worldly goals and reaching for the starts has got there on the first go...really. If there has been someone, I am completely unaware of them *smile*

Putting my intentions forward, safeguarding my dreams, making plans and taking steps is WONDERFUL,  but it all comes to nought if I am willing to give it all up at the first sign of difficulty.

As an early example in my life; I became pregnant with my first son at the age of 19, unwed, having only just begun my university studies, in an extremely devout catholic family...not a great place to find myself *wry grin* I was told I had, "ruined my life" by multiple people (not all my family members, I thought I should clarify) and that there was no use in planning for a future......

Hmmmm..... nope, that option is not for me thanks.

So, things were a LOT different from the plan I had formed and the dreams I envisaged for myself. Things that were easy became a little harder at times, but I simply would NOT relinquish my goal.

Sure, I made some adjustments, took a slightly different road, had some different choices and forks in the road than I may have had if things were different...but this did not change my end goal...and so, I persevered. No matter how hard, no matter how tired, no matter how broke, or how disaffected I felt, I just kept putting one foot in front of the other until I got there six long years later...and ooohhhh, the satisfaction!

With perseverance, I had two amazing things instead of the originally planned one; I had my degrees for the career I am passionate about...but more importantly, I had with me a gorgeous, beautiful, amazing child!!! Wooohoooo, two for the price of one *laugh*

Bottom line is, if the goal you set in your purpose, if it is what you truly want with your whole heart...then persevere, because if you are willing to give up when the going gets a little rough, well then, perhaps the goal was not what you really, really desire??? If it is, then keep taking those steps, don't give up, because the next step may be the one that leads you to the end zone.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxox

Universal life purpose

While we all have a goal we set, a life purpose which we are urged to fulfil and makes our heart leap with joy, I also believe there is a universal life purpose, one that we all share so to speak.

Our common life purpose then is to bring out the best in others. Let me take a moment to note though, that this cannot be achieved through criticism, nor through judgement.

Simply, we are all charged with inspiring each other.

We can do this in oh so many (non intrusive) ways.


Use positive and loving words when speaking to, about, or thinking of others.
See the light being and the love in all people regardless of their actions.
Forgive easily.
Love unconditionally.
Inspire others to be happy by perusing your own divine happiness, this sends out amazing rays of healing energy.

We are all of one spirit in the end, and we're all in this together. There are so many ways in which we can bring about joy, gratefulness, happiness and to generally lift up the energy levels of others, that once you get started, you can never think of stopping.

It's a pay it forward kind of thing, living your own blessings, respecting yourself and your boundaries, committing to happiness, forgiveness and a life that comes from a place of love means we shine our light on the world and inspire others to do the same with their choices...the results are magnificent.


With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Notice your awesomeness...

You know, at least fifty times a day you do something amazingly awesome! It's true, really it is. Unfortunately, most of the time, the awesome moments are overshadowed by something else, there is a minor disaster (the glass of milk slopped over the side, the toast landed on the floor buttered side down, etc) and suddenly, your awesomeness flees out of your mind in a flurry of self recrimination....

You know what, notice your awesomeness, notice the moments where the toast fell, you caught it, landed it back on the plate while doing a complicated dance step to avoid the cat winding its way around your ankles. Take heed when you went to step out into traffic, and suddenly stopped BEFORE a car came screaming around a courner. Take a bow when you managed to smile gracefully and with genuine love when someone was rude to you....

I mean...holy cow...YOU ARE AWESOME...

Just thought you should know.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxxo

To harm or to heal...

There are some emotions in our spectrum that definitely belong only to us; to humans that is, and they can be quite harmful. Anger, hate, distrust, fear and blame...just to name a few. While all of us at times, will experience this full range of emotive responses, our ability to mitigate them as soon as possible is to our own benefit.

Just recently, I experienced a "moment" a point in time that was a bit of a struggle and through the actions of another, I felt pain, disappointment and a whole gambit of non-useful emotions. .. bleh...not nice at all. All of a sudden, I was unable to sleep properly, the scenarios just kept going around and around in my head, I felt righteous, angry, and was laying a whole heap of blame at the feet of the other being involved.

Not helpful in the least.

While there is no doubt that the actions of another person precipitated these moments, it could also be said that I in turn, fed the experience by feeding fuel on the fire so to speak.

It was during the midst of this experience that I was given to understand a little more about guilt and blame and what an insidious set they can be. I consciously let go of blame, I chose to relay the events without blaming anyone (including myself for allowing the situation to develop) and to release the need to find someone at fault. Now, I'm not saying this was an easy skill to master, but it can be done.

In trying to find someone else to blame, it is possible I was trying to relinquish my own responsibility or to lessen the blow, in actual fact, what I was doing was creating a pool of anger and resentment around me, and building a wall between myself and others in order to protect myself from being hurt in the same way again...sheesh...also not helpful.

I looked at the situation from a more detached point of view, then, I repeated over and over again the statement, "No one is to blame, this situation just is as it is." Even when I was telling a close friend about the situation, I said these words again, each time reinforcing the belief that this is true.

In releasing the need to lay blame, I released the need to judge and to be angry. In so doing, I found it so much easier to move on without adding to my hurt.

In short, by adding no blame I could forgive, and so heal and move on.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Seriously exciting and energising stuff

Firstly, let me offer my apologies for my prolonged and unexpected absence. There are moments in time for writing, moments in time for growing, for listening, for changing, for thinking for feeling etc. I write these posts from my heart, as I am guided to do. I never intended for there to be such a long absence between postings, but hey...you gotta do what you've gotta do...and what I had to do was to grow... *smile*

So many different things have been happening over the last month or so, chapters closing, doors opening, a new story burgeoning (seriously exciting) and growth for me as a person.

I have taken a lot of time on my own to delve into the direction I wish to take and to feel my way through some obstacles.

I have discovered many secrets to being a better me, and have also learnt some more about healing myself of hurts both past and present.

Don't worry, I will most certainly be sharing these things with you over time...trust me, it's too much all at once *laugh*

The one thing I focused a lot of energy on and spent a great deal of time in contemplating and talking to the team about was/is the direction I am currently taking. I set my intentions for the year we have burst into all of a sudden, and am walking that path already.

It was quite a simple process really, although at the time it seemed magnificent and huge *wry grin* as I suppose all things just recently remembered seem to be. 

I sat myself down in a quiet spot with pen and paper and wrote my way through the year that had been; the heartaches, the trying times, the lack of understandings, the joy, the sorrows, the uplifting and the moments that seemed to drop out from underneath me. I wrote and wrote and wrote. Page upon page of the year that was poured forth. In short (sort of *wry grin*) I sat down and wrote myself a letter about the journey travelled. I couldn't help but feel uplifted by the number of pages pouring out of me. The fact that some of those pages detailed some not so pleasant moments was/is irrelevant ..I thought to myself, "Just look at how much I experienced!"

I set that letter aside, no need to read it further, I lived it after all. Having put aside the moments that I had already walked through, I looked to the moments to come and set my heart on a mission. The journey? Who am I....

On small pieces of paper, I wrote actions that the me I wish to be would take, for example, "Choose to forgive even though no apology was offered," and "love unconditionally and without stopping to discover if the other is worthy." and other such things. This is the person I AM, I told myself. This jar of papers are my self guide, in moments when the way doesn't seem as clear as it does now, I will be reading those pieces of paper to remind myself and put me back on the path.

I then decorated a second jar titled "2013". While I would love to take the credit for this one, I didn't come up with the idea *smile* it came from a Facebook message. This jar started with nothing in it, however, as a beautiful, wonderful, magical experience happens to me throughout the year, I will be writing it on a piece of paper and popping it into that jar. As the year progresses, the jar will continue to fill and then this New Year's Eve, I will open the jar and relive all the magic of 2013 and rejoice...great place to end and to begin.

Three small things that I could accomplish with relatively small amount of effort that have acted to propel me into 2013 with freshness, rejuvenation and hope....FANTASTIC way to begin.

A lot of stuff happening on the work front too (my real work that is...the work of being a light bringer *laugh*) and a lot of exciting things to follow here *does a happy dance, clapping her hands and singing a tune* 

I would love to hear the events that have bought you into this new moment...feel free to share.

With extreme amounts of love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxox

P.S. If you feel like a dose of unconditional love right now...feel free to pop in on the new facebook page run by myself and an amazingly angelic fellow light bringer called "Love Bubbles" https://www.facebook.com/pages/Love-B...

Walk past the human moments

So many times misunderstandings and arguments have come up in my life because I couldn't (or more likely wouldn't) walk past the human moments.

By human moments, I mean when someone is acting (in my perception) selfishly, ignorantly, said something I have taken personally or out of context, me reading my personal baggage into a completely innocent statement, arrogance and rudeness etc. 

When faced by one of these circumstances, it is at times rather difficult for me not to act as a riled cat with my tail all fluffed up, hissing and spitting and generally carrying on. (There's a nice visual for you)

A lot of times, I have acted, in what I saw, as "self-defence" immediately going on the attack and taking no prisoners ..the down side to having a solid vocabulary and the willingness to use it, is that in these moments, so much damage can be done that there is no room for understanding and forgiveness later when the mistake has been realised.

*sigh*

In later years, as I have walked further down my path and come to a deeper understanding of the concept that we are all of the same source, all beautiful and divine in our own way, and all possess the right of choice and non-judgement, I have managed to cage the cat somewhat *laugh* Still, she is sometimes there beneath the surface.

Now, I practise what I call "walking past the human moments." (Notice I said "practise")  I choose silence in the face of all of the scenarios I described above, even when it is REALLY obvious to me that someone is trying to get under my skin or being deliberately and wantonly rude or ignorant. In the moment of silence, I look for the light being that is all of us in essence. I look past the humanness of the actions, and really attempt to see the person who has affronted me. With that moment, I am usually able to discover part of the reason/reasons for the persons behaviour, I am able to remind myself that I should remember that all of us are fighting one battle or another and it is not fair or right to judge when I don't know the story. In short, by giving silence, I give myself a moment to step away from judgement and to embrace forgiveness and understanding rather than judgement...then, the "need" to retaliate is passed by.

I want to say also, that I used to see this as a weakness, not retaliating when others are rude or offensive. I used to think I had not stood up for myself or put myself forward....what I know now, is that I accept responsibility for only one persons actions...my own.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Smiling when your heart hurts the most

This is one of those arts that I have perfected over the long-term, smiling and "putting on a good face" so that no-one even suspects I am hurting at any given time. Walking through the world with no one aware of what is going on inside my head. While this has been, for me, a survival skill, it has changed over recent years into something more positive. I am thankful, therefore, for all the times I used this tool to help me hide, because it has taught me to use it for a far better purpose now.

I look at the world sometimes, and I shake my head, my heart hurts, I feel complete bewilderment and sometimes anger. A world where little ones are not always safe in their classrooms, where cruelty happens to people and our animal friends daily, where slavery still exists and so many starve and are without help when they need it. 

In times like this, while my heart is hurting and I just want to weep, I find smiling, finding something to be happy and grateful for, is the first step to healing. I am not just talking about being brave or putting a good face on it. I am talking about genuine joy and gratitude even for the smallest thing. This kind of love sends out an energy. I cannot give those little ones back their lives, nor can I provide food and freedom and basic rights to the MANY who lack for them. What I can do, and it is no small thing, is I can send my love to the world, I can be grateful and joyful and allow that loving and positive energy to infect others, and still more others. I can ask forgiveness for those who I perceive need it, and I can send love and comfort across the globe in empathy.

I don't find that ranting and raving without action a healing and helpful thing, not for me, not anymore.

Sending love into the world tonight
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Regaining serenity

I hope that by now, having read a few of these posts, it has become apparent to you, beautiful beings, that while I may listen, have faith, believe  and walk a path of love and forgiveness as best I know how...I am also, undeniably human into the bargain *smile.

There have been so many times when I have "lost" my connection with the divine (in other words, too preoccupied with what's going on and buying into the negative to listen) and when these moments come upon me, I feel as lost as though I didn't know there were angels guiding my every step. *sigh* 

At least now, I can remember in those moments, that the team is still there, will ALWAYS be there, that no matter how lonely, I am never alone. 

All the platitudes in the world don't help though in a moment of helplessness, of heart aching loneliness or of extreme grief and pain.  Yep...I have these moments too...human remember *smile*

Connecting with nature has always been one of the things that has helped me to ease the ache, or to regain some semblance of balance within my soul. Even before I realised that my heart and the divine, were constantly giving me the information I needed to walk the path I choose and to be happy, I sought out nature when I felt particularly aggrieved  Sitting by the beach, watching the waves continue their endless march in and out, sitting in a garden under a tree, walking through a particularly old, and nurturing part of rain forest, or just sitting outside on the grass...all of these things have helped me immeasurably, and many others besides.

Regardless of what creed you believe  or whether you think there are a divine team of beings guiding your steps or a conscious universe acting in accordance of your intentions, nature can have a healing impact when you feel lost and dishevelled and a little afraid.

Try it out when you are hurting. Go and sit in the garden and let your thoughts roam and wander where they will. Sit silently, or talk, or sob, or whatever takes your heart in the moment. Look at your surroundings or sit as though seeing through the environment. None of this matters. Just being surrounded by nature has the ability to heal; to restore some sense of calm and serenity.

For me, I always take pen and paper with me when I seeks out nature's healing comfort. Inevitably, as I sit and feel the hurt drain from me, and a calm peace sooth me, I start to hear my heart again, and when my heart is whispering to me, I make sure I am taking notes.

With love and light
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo