Michael Joe Armijo's Blog, page 46

A Jaunt To Vegas

“He could mix in any company, but he always knew who he was.”--Ben Macintyre, AGENT ZIGZAG
My days seem to drag a bit.  I feel like a mouse in a maze at times while various ideas sift in my mind.  I look at want ads and a weekly magazine for potential employment but nothing strikes me at this point. 
Alan is involved with his commercial real estate properties and he always has a story about an employee, a tenant or his business partner.  He makes like so interesting.  I feel connected with the outside world when he comes home.   I like living at Sea Colony, near the beach with him.  The cool foggy misty mornings are special.   It makes me feel like home in Alameda (only I am much closer to the beach and I see plenty of palm trees).  It’s just why I moved to Southern California.   I prefer the sunshine but these misty mornings are perfect for January and February. 
As I am alone working on a painting or taking a break I think of my dad.  He is gone and I realize how much he gave to me.  He could mix with any person.  He knew how to talk to people and was always a likable man.  I feel I have taken that quality.  I don’t like to judge people.  I like to know all peoples.  I may not agree with all of what certain people say but I refrain from disagreement.  It only hurts me inside to be negative.  I’d rather avoid conflict and walk away.  I think my dad would often do the same.  He always played neutral ground with a smile.
Alan and I went to see another movie that we really loved.  It was called SCENES FROM A MALL.  It was a comedy and we actually laughed.   It was starring Bette Midler and Woody Allen.   They played a married couple on their 16th anniversary.   They take a trip to a Beverly Hills mall and it becomes the stage for personal revelations and deceptions.  They made a great team.
Alan and I met on November 20th in 1989, so we consider the 20th of each month our anniversary.  I joked, “Maybe we should go to the mall on November 20th…or even March 20th…and see what words come out.”“Yeah right,” Alan replied.
On March 1st I sent a postcard to mom from the Caesars Palace Hotel in Las Vegas.  Yes, Alan and I took a weekend escape there.   Alan surprised me with tickets to see JOAN RIVERS.  He’s the best.  I wrote the following to mom:
Hi Mom,Did you hear Marlon Brando’s son got away with murder with a sentence of only ten years?  He will be allowed parole release in four to five years.  It is amazing, isn’t it?I made it to Las Vegas and almost won $1200 on KENO but it was a “pretend” game that we had placed.  Wouldn’t you know it!  I still have two days left here.  I will see JOAN RIVERS “Live” here at Caesars Palace tonight.Thinking of You, Always. Love,Michael
March 3rd… I received a menu card from Gloria Romero from her visit to the DANVILLE HOTEL Restaurant and Saloon.   I liked the picture of what looked like a hot chocolate paired with a cup of hot tea with a cinnamon stick.  It seemed like two perfect anecdotes to enjoy on a cold winter day.  Inside the card, Gloria wrote:  “Hi!  I enjoyed a day with the girls.  This was a nice place, a nice postcard menu of drinks.  Thinking of You.  Love, Gloria”
And a day or two later I received another card from Dorothy Rua.  She and I still have an occasional telephone conversation.  Like Alan, she often inspires me once I hang up the phone.  The Black and White photographic image on her card reminded me of SPANKY from the LITTLE RASCALS.  I liked the old mid-century kitchen scene.  And I got the message of SPANKY looking up at a 'pie' that seemed so utterly unattainable.  It's amazing how a photo can relay such a good message.  Dorothy wrote:3-4-91Dear Michael,The think you want are NOT always as out of reach as they initially appear.  You and I both know it’s possible to find a way to get what you want.  You have to be determined.   And above all you must have the talent!  Just remember when you grab hold of that pie (or job)…enjoy it!  It is all going to happen for you.  I just know it!

I enjoyed our talk last week.  Thanks for the movie tips.  You’ve probably returned from your “jaunt to Vegas”.   Was it great fun?  It’s great to have a change of scenery and I bet the shows weren’t bad.  How did you do at the Black Jack tables?  Tell me you won enough to retire on.  Ha-- Was Alan lucky?
It’s been a while since I’ve gone to the TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN to ‘Dream Impossible Dreams’ but here I am today.  I didn’t have anything planned for lunch and you’ve been on my mind, so here I sit, enjoying the rain pouring down, the wind blowing everything in sight and the sky getting darker by the minute.  I love it.  I guess I’m in the mood for stormy weather.  It’s been a while but I am also in the mood to contemplate that unwritten book of mine.  I think part of it is the weather or maybe it is because yesterday I woke from a dream about you!   This time I didn’t jump up and walk four miles (like I did one and a half years ago).  I would have been nuts.  It was raining cats and dogs yesterday morning.  Sometimes life is a real puzzle and I wonder if I will ever get even a portion of it solved.  Maybe the unexplained mystery is what it is all about!
Why am I so into the enjoyment of this stormy weather?   At the same time, thinking about running on a sandy beach with the sun on my back and the wind in my face would be equally nice.  Perhaps the real question is why can’t I have it all?
How are YOU doing?   Are you HAPPY with most of your choices?  They all sound right.  I mean…based on the direction you’ve wanted to go it seems right.  I am sure you’ll have even better choices ahead!  Let me know what possibilities arise, okay?
The PAC TEL Sale went through yesterday and the company is now owned by PAC TEL MERIDIAN (a joint venture between PACIFIC TELESIS and NORTHERN TELECOM).  I am still around at the request of Larry, the Director…for how long I don’t know.  I guess we will all see who remains in the picture. Do you and Alan have any more trips planned?  Or are you just saving your Vegas winnings?I am enjoying my OREO cookies and thinking of you.Love, Dorothy
“I don’t know much about government and economics and all that, and I don’t want to know much, but I do know that the Federal Government to me, to one small citizen, is mostly dreary hallways and waiting around.  The more we have, the longer we wait and the tireder we get.”--Harper Lee, GO SET A WATCHMAN

In Search of the Right Thing

There is nothing the British do not have.  They have the geniuses and we have the nincompoops.--Ben Macintyre, In his true story of Nazi Espionage, Love and Betrayal:AGENT ZIGZAG
Well…my last day at PLATT COLLEGE has come (February 15th) and gone.   I had to do a final “paid” internship.  I was lucky that Alan allowed me to do a design a brochure for his apartment building in Kent, Washington (near Seattle).   It came out rather well and Alan (and his real estate partner, Art) plan to use it.   I am a full-fledged Graphic Artist now; however, they still wanted me to sign on to Computer Graphic School but money is tight and I can’t do it right now.
Now that the INTER/MEDIA Ad Agency in Encino let me go in January I don’t have a stream of income.   I have to wade lightly.  I still have high hopes.  
Alan is so good at motivating me and reminding me that Los Angeles is the road to many opportunities.  I am still in search of the right thing.  I just know I don’t want to get caught up in the corporate world of a major utility company like Pacific Bell or PAC Bell Yellow Pages.   I want something different.
In celebration of my graduation Alan and I went out to dinner at our favorite place: LOUIS XIII for the filet mignon with pepper sauce and frites accompanied with a bottle of Chateauneuf-du-Pape French red.   Afterward we went to see a stunning and scary film called SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.  
Jodie Foster (one that I’ve always loved—even since I was a kid when she was guest starring in the Family Affair) was magnificent.  

The villain, a British actor named Anthony Hopkins was terrifying.  We loved it.   I have always admired the English actor/actress.   They often seem to have that genius edge.   
I always wonder what my life would have been like if I went to Boarding School in England (a what-if fantasy of mine); however, I know I would’ve missed mom and dad.
L.A. life is certainly about ‘the movies’.   There are a lot of people working in the Entertainment Industry…and many who strive to be involved with it.  It’s a cut-throat business though.  I am coming to learn that there are other ways to be happier though.   Real LIFE isn’t necessarily about the movies.   Real LIFE is about living a HAPPY life ‘no matter what’.  Perhaps a I need a 'cold beer' outing to loosen up my mind in order to brainstorm some new ideas.
Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.
-Martin Luther King Jr.

One Of Those Days

Altruistic LOVE is characterized by unconditional kindness toward ALL BEINGS and is apt to be expressed at any time in favor of every being in particular.--Matthieu Ricard, ALTRUISM

I realized I hadn't written mom since February 6th when I wrote:
Dear Mom,
Contrary to what you may believe I miss you and want to see you.  That's why I arranged my trip to the Bay Area in March.  I want you to see my Graphic Arts Portfolio from PLATT COLLEGE.  It should be done by the time I arrive.   Thanks for being there for my thoughts, trouble and worries.
Lots of Love, Michael
I did receive my fair share of VALENTINE CARDS for 1991.  I was touched by receiving three cards from my niece, Ashley.  She even created one on her own with paper and pencil (and drew her own heart).   I loved it. 
One of Ashley’s cards made me laugh.   The cover of the card had the question imprint, “WHAT NEWSPAPER DO COWS READ?”   When you the open the card the answer was THE EVENING MOOS.   The third card depicted a cute puppy with the imprint “You’re Special” and inside the imprinted words were “You know just how to make me feel loved!”  She wrote, “DEAR UNCLE MIKE, LOVE, ASHLEY ARMIJO." Heartwarming.
Reed Campbell (former Pac Bell coworker in San Francisco) sent me a postcard from Macau, Hong Kong.  He wrote:
Feb. 14, 1991Hi Michael,We went to MACAU to pay our taxes…same as when we hit Lake Tahoe-Reno or Las Vegas.  We didn’t win anything but it was very interesting.  MACAU is a village with big buildings and dirty—but Hong Kong is a City, clean and beautiful.   The buildings here are breathtaking.  Las Vegas could take lessons.  Hope you enjoyed your VALENTINE.Best Always, Reed

Dorothy Rua sent a simple card, a Hallmark one with thoughtful words:  “Especially for You: You’re in my thoughts on Valentine’s Day—and in my heart all year.”
Former coworker, Gloria Romero, sent a HOT RED postcard with simple handwritten words: 
Dearest Michael, Hope all is well.   Thinking of you.  A Valentine just for you.  Love, Gloria
And Alan was in a ‘tie’ with my niece, Ashley, as he gave me three Valentine’s also.   One described the meaning of the word LOVE (in the form of a noun):  A widely misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes the eyes to sparkle, the cheeks to glow, the blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker frequently.  Inside was imprinted I LOVE YOU and he added “A LOT!”   Sweetness.

Alan’s other card depicted a young handsome lad in boxer shorts with red hearts on them.   Inside the card, Alan wrote these words:
Dear Michael,Imagine starting Friday, February 22nd it is gym and water diet…within six months—if you help me—and I restrain you we could look a little like this card (or last years).  Love You, ALAN [image error]
His third card was a bit on the funny side.   A goober caricature was about to write at his desk and was thinking, “Dear Valentine, When I’m sad, you make me smile.  When I’m mad, you understand and let me get it out.   When I’m happy, you play with me so we can be happy together. “   
Inside the card was imprinted “I’M GLAD I KNOW YOU…IT’S CHEAPER THAN CONSTANT THERAPY.”   Ha-ha…in his own handwriting, Alan wrote:  Michael, I Love You and wish you all the Valentine wishes you have for yourself.   Good luck in your new career.  Love, ALAN.
And I loved the special Valentine that BIRDA sent me as well.   This was written on the cover of the card: A Shy Valentine Poem to Someone I like.   I sometimes find it rather hard to say I really care and that I like you quite a lot, But I’ve said it now—so there.    Inside the card, Birda wrote in her own words: Michael,I received your CALVIN KLEINS and I love it.  You’re the only one I know who would have such a unique way of showing off your underwear.  
Again, it couldn’t have arrived at a better time.  I was having ONE OF THOSE DAYS!   I came home after a 14 ½ hour day read to scream, but your “undies” put a smile back on to my face.   Thank You, Love Always, BirdaP.S.  Plans didn’t work (I am).  I don’t know when I’ll be able to make it down…hopefully before you move back.  If not…we’ll have to plan on doing down together so I don’t miss those great spots you’ve encountered.  I’m looking forward to it.  Happy Valentine’s Day.  Always, B.B.

I did write mom again on February 17th.  I wrote:
Dear Mom,
Here is the stationery I designed. I did the logo myself and completed the camera ready artwork and mechanical so the printer could print it easily.  The letterhead looks pretty sharp, yes?  Well, I like it.  I am sending you my new business card also.

I was on the telephone with you only an hour ago.  You ordered yourself a medium pizza, remember?  I wish I could have a slice with you.  I do like combination pizza, you know.

This Tuesday is my last day of driving to Eagle Rock, CA for classes...Thank God!  The experience at PLATT COLLEGE Graphic Arts was good though.  I learned a lot and now I have a "book" or "portfolio" (they both mean the same).  I actually did a composition of a bookcover and two compact disc cover designs today.  A comp (or composition) is simply a drawing of what the bookcover or CD would actually look like in terms of colors used, design, etc. 

I was going to write INTER MEDIA Advertising about my W-2 but have decided not to waste a stamp on them.  That was a short-lived career as an Account Manager for Psychiatric Hospitals' National Yellow Page Advertising.  I may jot a few lines to Dorothy Rua in Walnut Creek beferoe I head for the burger joint to meet Alan, Lauren and Carrie for a bite to eat.

I can't wait until St. Patrick's Day weekend to see you.  Time flies when I am with you because we always have such a good time!  
Love Forever,
Michael
P.S.  Oh, Mom, here's the bookcover I colored purple and did not like.  I redid it and changed the title from THE TIME TUNNEL to PSYCHIC VISION using the same illustration (the eye and the tunnel).  Later, Love You, Michael And a very scary movie was just released here on Valentine's Day.  It's being termed as the perfect date movie (yeah, right?).  I am eager to see it once my Graphic Arts classes are over.  This will be very soon.  Alan and I will likely see it next week.   It stars Jodie Foster who I absolutely adore.   The film is called SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.   I cannot wait to see it.  The word here in Los Angeles/Hollywood is that it will keep you feeling queasy and at the edge of your seat.  It sounds like just my cup of tea (or should I say my glass of chianti). 
“A census taker once tried to test me.  I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.”–Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter

I'm The Instigator

Sara:  Roland thinks L.A. is a place for the brain-dead.  He says, if you turned off the sprinklers, it would turn into a desert.  But I think - I don't know, it's not what I expected.  It's a place where they've taken a desert and turned it into their dreams.  I've seen a lot of L.A. and I think it's also a place of secrets:  secret houses, secret lives, and secret pleasures.  And no one is looking to the outside for verification that what they're doing is all right.  So what do you say, Roland?Roland:  I still say it's a place for the brain-dead.--Steve Martin, from the 1991 Film, L.A. STORY
I was so “touched” when I departed the car with mom at Ashley at the Oakland Airport.   Ashley gave me a card to take with me to read while I was on the plane.  It was a homemade card and I came to realize that “homemade” cards are definitely the best.   The time and care it takes to make them is unreal and quite beautiful.  Ashley took the time to draw a bright sun that was shining along with a Southwest Airplane and a couple of clouds.   Inside the card she included a sticker of a pencil (an image to inspire me to write to her from Los Angeles).   Ashley wrote:
Bye-Bye Uncle Mike!!!Bye!
Uncle Mike,Since ”your” going I want to say I LOVE YOU one more time.   AshleyP.S. I “promis” I will write. 
Upon my arrival back to West Hollywood I found a postcard in my mailbox from Barbara Reynolds, making me feel a tad guilty that I didn’t get to see her while in the Bay Area.   Her card reminded me of how CALIFORNIA is the only State ‘to be’…there’s so much here that one needn’t go anywhere else.  It confirmed my choice to always Live-in California.  Why leave?  Barbara wrote: 2, Feb. 91Mike – Thinking for now…but too much happening.What do we do with the cost of sending mail rising?  Things okay really…figuring out those buttons that make me feel weird.  It’s good.  I do know a point of happiness.   I saw “ALICE”, a Woody Allen film last week (A spoiled Manhattan housewife re-evaluates her life after visiting a Chinatown healer, starring Mia Farrow and William Hurt).  Good!Mary Lance’s retro-dinner is on Feb 15th.  I’m going with Beth and Linda Layman, too.  Tres exciting.Should I have told you sooner?  My work hours are now 9:30am-6pm…Tel# 811-0800 between 9-5pm.I hope things are great.
Love, Barbara
And, of course, I was back to my work and school routine; however, I was on countdown mode for Graphic Design classes to end.  I couldn’t wait for my last day.  In my spare time I will soon be able to catch up on movies to see.   Alan and I saw the new Steve Martin comedy called “L.A. STORY”.  We laughed at the scene when he parked his car a block away from his house because no one walks in L.A.   It’s true.  It’s terrible.  I love to walk.  I tend to see more when I walk (that when I bike).   I miss a lot when I drive.  Ugh!
I was in the mood to write Paloma a long letter as she had recently wrote to me.  I had more time on my hands and it's my way of spending time with her; however, the long-distance apart.   I found six cards from my archives to use and also sent her a beautiful photocopy of a Polaroid photo that I had taken of my niece, Leigh E Armijo, while in Alameda a few days ago.

Card 1: Tarzan and Jane
February 6, 1001, 9:00AM,
Hi Paloma,
Thanks for the MADRID, Spain postcard.  How exciting for you to be in SPAIN!  I really liked SPAIN when I visited.  That must be funny seeing cousins from 'way back when'.  I bet you and Alexandre had a good time.

Sorry I have not written more frequently but you know how it is when you get caught up in the every day world.

Here are a few cards I had and I picked out especially for you.  Which one do you like best?

My schooling finally ends on February 15, 1991.  Than I polish-up my portfolio and go on interviews for an internship.  I want an internship in the ENTERTAINMENT field.  I'd like to help design movie posters and/or CD covers for record companies or book covers.

Card 2: Black and White filling up a human with gasoline to 'perk up'
I am also getting my own business card, letterhead and envelopes of which I personally designed myself.  I will send you copies of each when they are ready.  Since I will be designing things I will need more influential design ideas.   So please continue to sen me anything you see that is wild, zany, eye-catching in any magazines (or cards).  Please send them to me.  I won't copy it exactly but I can conform the idea with some changes.  So do keep me in mind.

The French actor, Girard Depardieu (did I get the spelling right?), is getting a lot of recognition in town.  He won a BEST ACTOR Award in a comedy for the Golden Globes last week for his part in the movie, GREEN CARD.  Did you see that movie?


Card 3: Air France
GREEN CARD was pretty good.  It brought back memoreis of "us".  I think mostly because he is a French actor.  He is also in CYRANO DE BERGERAC which is supposed to be a good movie.  I may go to see it.  He is also in a new movie with Robert DeNiro called GUILTY BY SUSPICION.  I keep seeing his face and name all over the place.  Card #2 reminds me that I need to refuel and go bike riding more often.   Card #1 I piced up at an ART show: Tarzan and Jane.  It could have been us from yesteryear.   Card #3 reminds me of me going to see YOU via Air France!  Card #4...well, shouldn't that me me and you coming down the stairs?   Card #5 is definitely your body-likeness.  Card #6 is my body-likeness (no laughing!).  

Card #4:  A Fancy Hotel with a Fancy Staircase
I went to Alameda this past weekend (Feb 2nd, 3rd) to see mom, my brothers, sister in laws and five nieces.  It was short...but sweet.  

How is Jonathan?

I am working on designing my own brochure to promote myself as a Freelance Graphic Artist. Hopefully I will get work on the side in addition to getting hired 'in-house' somewhere.  Time will tell.  I will keep you posed and once I have my actual brochure completed I will send you a cop of that, too.  

My days are more free now that I left that "ugh" job on January 7, 1991...but I've had a chance to create some new artwork that I normally would not have been able to do had I been working.  I did an ink drawing and a fictitious movie psted called ABANDONED IN THE AMAZON.   My brochure will show some of my work, so be prepared to make your honest critique. 

Card #5: Sexy Gal in Lingerie
So, Paloma...do you have any undies like this? Ha-ha.

After I finish this letter to you I may go to the beach in Santa Monica and try bicycling for a while.  I have to be at my class by 6PM.  I am working on a magazine ad for a children's breakfast cereal.  It is due on Friday night. 

Jeez...It is hard to believe I saw you in July 1990 and it is almost a year since then.  Times sure does fly by.  It is amazing how short life can be.  I was answering some fill-in-the-blank psychological questionnaire and one of the questions was:  HOW MANY MORE YEARS TO YOU THINK YOU HAVE TO LIVE?  I thought, well,if I am thirty-one...I have forty or fifty years left and that is NOT very long at all.  I better enjoy life to the fullest.  You should too!   Don't hesitate to do the things you want to do.

Oh...here are two om my nieces, HOLLY and LEIGH (photocopies enclosed).  They are four days apart in age, both born in 1988.

Card #6: A Naked Man, posing (me) Ha-ha

I xeroxed the photos of HOLLY and LEIGH because I was going to attempt an ink drawing of each of them.  I had a couple of extra copies, so I thought you'd like to see them.  Aren't they cute?

I am looking forward to your postcard from the IBIZA area.  I know you're enjoying yourself, considering you traveled from PARIS to CALIFORNIA I know traveling is a favorite past-time for you.  I may go to Las Vegas in a couple of weeks.  I have this "itch" to go to New York again, too.  Maybe I will go in the Springtime.

Oh well...it's about 10AM now and I guess I will escape and go do something productive.  

It looks liked DANCES WITH WOLVES may win BEST PICTURE of the year.  They announce the Academy Award nominees on February 13th.  
Keep laughing...
Love, You, Michael
P.S.  Tell Alexandre I said "HI" and Jonathan, too.  
P.S.  Have you bee in touch with your brother in the USA?

I also received a fun, sexy card from Dorothy Rua.  When I saw the cover of the card I thought, “Uh-oh…does Dorothy have the hots for me…or what?”  Ha-ha   Perhaps I ‘egg her on’ with the cards I send.  I’m the instigator. Dorothy wrote:
2-10-91Dear Michael,As I mentioned on the phone I loved all four of the cards you sent!   And what a wonderful surprise to open my mailbox and discover the bonanza!   The fellow with his shopping card was so appropriate for today’s times.   And the boss with his secretary in the 1950’s convertible reminded me so much of that little card store on Grand Street in The City.  What a great way to work!   Then again, more room in the back seat! Ha!  I can be so bad…
Speaking of bad, you’re really BAD…in your usual fun way, of course.   I mean, when I saw the GUY AND GAL card (unable to perform) I really did say “Holy Shit” out loud in the car.   Like I said, thank goodness I got the mail that day!   The one thing we both know is you wouldn’t have sent it if you thought I wouldn’t enjoy it so much!  Ha!  It’s great.  Plus…the fourth card gave me some insight into your choice of intimate clothing!  Yes, you sent quite a selection and they were all very much enjoyed!  Thanks… I really hope something wonderful develops in the entertainment field for you.  I know it’s where you should be.   As the title of that one book says:  “DO WHAT YOU LOVE, THE MONEY WILL FOLLOW”.  Keep me posted, especially if Alan’s contact develops into something.
Things are really busy at Pac Tel Business Systems and the purchase off the company is scheduled to occur next month.  I don’t know how much longer I’ll be there.   We’ll see.   Things are much the same on the home front.  Nicole is playing soccer on a competitive team this winter so that keeps us busy.   She’s looking forward to the school Valentine dance this week.   Jean-Paul begins Little League practice next month for the new season.   Wasn’t I just writing you about how happy I was to see last season ending?   I’ve learned he also has his first “crush” on a girl at school!  
This can’t be happening!  I don’t feel old enough to have kids old enough to be attracted to the opposite sex!  Oh well, it’s all in the attitude, or so I keep saying.
I did have an opportunity to join friends for a few drinks after work on Friday.  We had a fun time.  How I could use more Rest and Relaxation!  How I would love to visit with MJA sometime in his life.Like this card?  Make ME feel GREAT.  I mean, really FINE.  Hope you like it, too.Happy Valentine’s Day! Love, Dorothy
Alan knows some fellow who owns a Promotional Movie Poster company.   In fact, Alan and his partner, Art, almost bought the company.   Alan’s trying to connect me with the company to see if I can get some sort of Graphic Artist position there; however, he may be selling the company.  So, who knows?  It could simply be a dead end.   Something is better than nothing though.On a more pleasurable note…Alan and I made it out to see another movie.  
This one was a suspenseful-thriller called SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY.   There was a scene that looked like a cool house in Malibu.  I was sure that Alan and I had walked-by it during one of our shoreline beach strolls over there.   The movie starred JULIA ROBERTS as a young woman who fakes her own death in an attempt to escape her nightmarish marriage, but discovers it is impossible to elude her controlling husband.   
It was good edge-of-your-seat action movie.  We loved it.
“I can't live without you.  And I won't let you live without me.”--as heard while watching the 1991 film, SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY

Just Another One of Life's Flaws

“Try the SPARKLY EYES technique.”-Jon Ronson, THE MEN WHO STARE AT GOATS
…just when one thinks that all of the best greeting cards have been sent and received I happen to find a miraculous one in my mailbox.   This time it was from Birda (a close-up image of a bicyclist pounding the metal to the pedal).   It makes me want to ride…ride like the wind.  Birda wrote about how we are often hit with ‘just another one of life’s flaws’.   And that’s when we both realize we need to ride our bikes to release those anxieties.   Birda wrote the following:
Jan. 29, 1991
Michael,
How are things going?   Things here are OK, I guess.  If I could either get the truck or the T.A. to run right it would be better.   Not having a car that can get me out of Alameda is driving me crazy.  I was going to get a new car but I have decided since my job is getting real slow and our contract is up in June it looks like there’s going to be a strike and then it wouldn’t be wise right now.  Oh well…it’s just another one of life’s flaws.  Just when you think you’ve got it beat it knocks you down again…but we shake it off and LIFE goes on.

I am still planning on a February trip to L.A.   So far it’s planned for February 11th.  Jan, my friend in L.A., is going to be up here on the 8th, 9th and 10th.   We are either going to fly back or drive down on the 11th and hopefully I’ll be able to stay until the 17th.  But (there’s always a ‘but’) if I can work I have to work to save for the lay0off and the possible strike.   So things are UP IN THE AIR until the last minute—as usual.  I never did like plans.  They have a way of letting you down.For the last month I’ve been working so much that it’s insane.  I’ve been to Phoenix, Arizona, Los Angeles (didn’t stay long), Fresno, Marysville, Woodland, Auburn, Roseville, Redding, Chico, Yreka, Eureka, Ukiah, Shingle Springs, etc.   That’s about 2000 miles a week.   And now I’ve been on-call for two days.  It’s nice having a 7-day weekend.  I’ve been riding my bike mostly while still having time for the domestic chores again.
I hope everything is going well with school.  Graduation next month!   I’ll bet you’re ready.  School is fun for a while but it doesn’t make much money and makes for very long days!   So I better let you go study.  Take care and if all goes well I will see you soon.Love Always, Birda
A couple of days later I received a brief, strange handwritten note from Mario in Miami.   I guess it was meant to make me chuckle as I’m sure he is NOT planning to do such a thing.   If he did it would be ‘just another one of life’s flaws’.   He wrote:
January 31, 1991Miami, FLHi Stranger,I am thinking to shave my head and move to IRAQ.What’s up with you?  Write and let me know…Your Friend,Mario I was looking forward to my 3-day weekend escape to Alameda for the nights of February 2nd, 3rd, and 4th.   There was no real time to see other friends.  I just wanted to be with mom and see immediately family.  It was more of a rest for me from school/work anyhow.  
I would’ve liked to meet Birda on the bike path but my bike is Los Angeles now.  As Birda would say, “It’s just another one of life’s flaws”.   It would be nice to ride on these familiar Alameda pathways again.
I brought my Polaroid camera along.  I wore my cool new black boots, too.

I arrived on Saturday morning.  Mom was on the phone with Grandma and I set my camera for a photo of me with her.   I meant to write the topic of what mom and Grandma were talking about but mom kept repeating “Mmmm huh”, so I didn’t hear what Grandma was gossiping about. 
We went to visit John at his townhouse on Cook Lane.  He was alone with the girls while Sherri was at work.   John had an evening shift. 

I couldn’t get over how big Ally was already.  Time flies when one is away.
Mom and I relaxed at home after dinner.   Her doll collection seemed to have grown but mom insisted that she hadn’t bought any others.“Do you ever talk to your dolls, mom?”  I asked. Mom just laughed.   I took that to mean that she doesn’t.  “Well, I know you did when you were a little girl with that special porcelain one that you had during your early Cerrillos, New Mexico days.”
February 3, 1991, Sunday
The following day mom and I went for breakfast at OLE’S WAFFLE SHOP on Park Street.   We stopped in on John and Sherri again but it seemed like a drab day of relaxation for them.  I managed to get a new Polaroid shot of Ally who seemed very much in discovery mode.   I nabbed a Polaroid of Ashley, too.   She had just finished a good cry.  I suppose she didn’t get what she wanted.   It happens to all of us.  It’s just another one of LIFE’s flaws.
John and Sherri and the girls were going to come over to mom’s house later.   Once we were back at mom’s house we soon received the pleasant arrival of Tony, Helen and their girls (Lauren and Leigh).  It was time for more photo opportunities.  I managed to get a good group photo.

Leigh was in tired mode.   I can’t win them all.   It’s just another one of life’s flaws.Soon, John and Sherri arrived with the girls (Ashley, Holly and Ally).   I snapped some more pictures.  It was fun and I was starting to feel sad that I had to leave tomorrow night. 
February 4, 1991
“I need another photo with you, mom.  How about we take it inside the indoor patio?”She agreed and laughed when I wanted to include the girls’ Pee Wee Herman doll that I bought for them.   
Mom drove me to Oakland Airport later that night.   It was short, but sweet.   I know I’ll return soon.  Leaving is sad sometimes but it’s just another one of life’s flaws.  Ha-ha.
At least I have something new to look forward to…Alan and I plan to go to see a new comedy coming out next weekend called “L.A. STORY”, starring Steve Martin (known for his Saturday Night Live fame).    My forward vision always has something else ahead of me.   It’s important to always have something new, exciting to expect.  Life’s too short.  Enjoy it.  Don’t limit it.
“Your vision never extended past the backyard.”
--as heard watching the Woody Allen 2009 film, WHATEVER WORKS

I Need A Hideaway

The Chinese believed it was beneficial to live on a mountain overlooking water, for it is there that lives THE DRAGON, and both DRAGON and WATER mean wealth.--Paul Huljich,BETRAYAL of Love and Freedom, a novel
Alan lives near the water and he is born in the Year of the Dragon.  This must be a good thing.  I do love the sea air.  I feel a cleansing when I run by the shoreline.
Dorothy sent a card that I truly loved that depicted a bit of the sea.  She knew I would love this card.  There was a waiter, looking out at the sea from some posh resort known as the REID’s HOTEL on the island of Madeira, Portugal where Winston Churchill was known to retreat and hideaway.   I need a hideaway.   Dorothy wrote:
1-22-1991Hi Michael! There’s no question about the picture on this card.  This card has the name MICHAEL J ARMIJO written all over it!   The palm trees, ocean and the contemporary gentleman looking out beyond the horizon for the answers to his future.   The second I saw this you came to mind.  It even looks like this guy keeps up with his aerobics!I was surprised when you told me you’d quit your job but now I fully understand after hearing the circumstances.  It’s amazing how few ‘professional’ people there are out there, isn’t it?  Some things are truly impossible to tolerate.  You sounded so much better, more relaxed during the last time we spoke.   The change will probably do you a world of good.  And as I said, your class studies may lead you to the place you want to be!
I ran into Tonee Owens the other day.  Every time I talk to her she has MORE ugly stories to tell about the SRC (SMART Resource Center) and it is all management related.   It doesn’t sound like their union has done much for them.  Laura (Barbie) is still floating around as one of the jokes of the office with her side kick (Ron Quinn).   They have some silly nickname for him, too.  Remember “Bill”, the red-headed trainer?  Well, he blew into town one day and stopped by the SRC to say hit to all.  I’m making myself sick just writing this stuff, so I’ll move on…
Did you get a chance to lunch with Laverne?  I hope all is well with her.
The latest news at PacTel Business Services is that Northern Telecom may be buying them (PTBS) in the springtime and a lot of people will probably be laid off.  The positive side is that everyone has at least been given a warning.
I’m already looking forward to the longer Spring/Summer days.  I know it’s only January but I feel like I work all day just to go home to eat and sleep.  I’ve been working late evening hours and I haven’t been exercising so I guess that’s part of my problem.   I also need to make more time somehow for fun time out with friends!  Where’s that BALANCE I’m always talking about?  Have you found your BALANCE in your life?  And have you been motivated to paint lately?  Have you seen much of your friend, Alan, these days?  Let me know what that horse feels when you get to Malibu!  I hope to hear from you.Love, Dorothy And the next day I received another letter (this time handwritten) from another former coworker from San Francisco.   She has frizzy hair and reminds me a bit of the Rosanna Danna character that Gilda Radner developed so well on SNL-Saturday Night Live.  Her name is Bobbie Renbarger.  I recalled that Barbara Reynolds (another coworker) had given her my address.   Bobbie wrote:
January 23, 1991Dear Michael,A HAPPY NEW YEAR to you, although with this crazy war I wonder just how good a year it will be!
It’s certainly started off with a bang…if you’ll excuse the pun!
I’ve been thinking of you and decided I just HAVE to write!  I wonder how you like living in Southern California and I wonder who you are working for…?  Who are you living with?  …if you are happy…if you visit the beautiful San Francisco on occasions…and if we’ll ever meet up again.It’s been a long time!

I heard you finally left PACIFIC BELL.  I assume and hope for greener pastures!
I’ve been out of the office for the past seven months driving a company car all around Contra Costa, training customers on the use of the CENTREX and COMMSTAR II.   For the first time with Ma Bell I actually love what I am doing.  I’m sure it’s because of the freedom and the challenge!Anyway, please write me or call.  I’d love to hear from you. Love, BobbieBobbie Renbarger206 NoeSan Francisco, CA 94114415-864-2526 I wasn’t one for wasting time.  I immediately called her.   We had such a great phone call.  I updated her on where I was working (along with my Graphic Art classes).   She has no idea if/when she’ll ever be in Los Angeles.   We shared some good lunches and breaks when we worked together.   We had a lot in common.  One of the main commonalities was our hatred of our jobs at the time, so I’m happy she is content now.   Who knows when we will see or speak again though?   The conversation was great but it was like a dead end in-a-way.   It helped the both of us to share our latest goals though.  
It’s an insightful, inspiring way to focus on being happy by focusing on exercise, helping others, being grateful, having small goals (that lead to big goals) and sharing your triumphs.--Shawn Achor, THE ORANGE FROG

LOVE TO DESIGN

“…IF someone loves you for what you can do then it’s flattering, but why do you love them?   IF someone loves you for who you are then they have to know you, which means you have to know them.”--Ann Patchett, BEL CANTO On Sunday night, January 16th, Alan and I went out to see an action-packed dramatic film called NOT WITHOUT MY DAUGHTER, starring Sally Field and Alfred Molina.   It was based on a true story of an American woman (Betty Mahmoody) escaping with her daughter from her abusive husband in the country of IRAN.   It was suspenseful and intense.   Wow! I said, “That’s our kind of movie.”Alan agreed.
I spent the rest of the night ‘venting’ to Alan about how much I hate my new job as an Account Manager at INTER/MEDIA.   Alan had already sensed my distress.   It’s not what I imagined it would be like to work at an Advertising Agency.   The concept of taking care of Psychiatric Hospitals regular and bold advertised listings in National Yellow Pages all over the country is not exactly the most charming of jobs.   I’m doing what I can to ‘make do’.   “Time will tell,” I said as I often do.
The week moved swiftly by.  I actually managed to do some extra credit work for my Graphic Arts class.  I created a MOVIE POSTER.  I would love to design MOVIE POSTERS.  I’m good at it. Many moves that I make are a matter-of-fact design decision.   What I choose to wear on a given day is based on my love to design (myself).

January 19, 1991...
I was in the mood to write to Paloma.  I selected four of my self-made cards and started writing.  I told her I quit my job at INTER-MEDIA Ad Agency but I was shocked that they actually fired me at the end of 1990 (December 31st).  They needed to streamline for the new year and I got 'the ax'.  Oh well, it was just as well.  It was a family business and I didn't like it much.  I just reported to work and did my job.  Alan has encouraged me. I didn't feel a need to tell Paloma that I was fired...it reeked of negativity and I want to be positive as I move forward.

Card 1-CANNES:

Dear Paloma, Sorry I haven't written lately but school, work and holidays got in my way.  I just quit my job back on January 7th and being unemployed feels good right now.
I am still taking my Graphic Arts classes.  I really like creating new things.  I recently designed a poster for a concert.

Card 2-A RENOIR-looking painting
I also completed a newsletter design.

It looks like a WAR is in the air.  That Sadaam Hussein in IRAQ is a lunatic.  HE needs to be shaken-up somehow.

I'm trying to get back into the "fitness" scen now that I am off during the days.  You thought I wouldn't really like that last card you sent--boring--no way.  I loved it!  It was like a painting with vases, pitcher and bowl on a table.  It was a very unique "still life".

Card 3- A Rainbow in the Sky
How are Jonathan, Alexandre and Balaruc?

How was your trip to PARIS?

A new TV show started here called DARK SHADOWS.  It's a remake from a soap-opera I loved to watch while I was growing up as a kid. It's about vampires and witches.  I really like it.

I've heard that Linda Evans, Joan Collins and John Forsythe have agreed to reunite for a special 4-hour mini-series finale to the DYNASTY story.

I have to be at Graphic Arts school in a couple of hours.  It was beautiful today.  It was hard to be totally free knowing i have to be at class at 4:30pm.

Card 4- An Indoor Swimming Pool
I am going to fly home to Alameda on February 2nd and stay through February 4th for the weekend.  It is only $40.00 round trip.  That's the BEST special they've ever had from L.A. to S.F.

I hope all is well with you.   Forgive me for not writing but I've been working on my ART projects and have been in a 'desire to sleep' stage.  Thinking of You, Love, Michael


“Not everybody reads poetry or listens to music, but every single person in the world gets up in the morning and puts on something, and whether you like it or not, that’s a statement about who you are.”--Adrian Anthony Gill, British columnist/author, b. June 28, 1954, as read in the GODS AND KINGS book by Dana Thomas

Pooped Out

“Gardens have always had a special place in Persia throughout our history.  In fact, the word "paradise" is a Persian word.  It's hard to believe, isn't it, that the idea of paradise will always be intimately connected with Iran.  Whenever I think of what's happening to my country, I try to remember its gardens."--Actor Roshan Seth as HOUSSEIN in the 1991 film,NOT WITHOUT MY DAUGHTER
There’s a new Jean-Claude Van Damme movie out called LIONHEART.   I want to see it with Alan but I’m not sure time will allow for it with my busy schedule.   I recalled reading that Jean-Claude likes to do the Santa Monica steps.  He has a very fit body and I aspire to be as fit as he shows to be. 
I did persuade Alan to do the Santa Monica steps with me recently.  It’s the beginning of the year and everyone is on their fitness kick of New Year resolution goals.  I didn’t see Jean-Claude at the steps but I can feel the benefit from doing them (especially on the butt).   We did the concrete and the wooden steps repeatedly until we were “pooped out”.   It felt good.  It’s an exhilarating feeling to be “pooped out”.
I saw a photo clip of Jean-Claude from the LIONHEART film.   If I don’t get to see the film—at least I was inspired by the photo clip.  He was born in 1960 and is a year younger than me.   PHOTO:  Jean-Claude Van Damme, DAMN!
I wish I could do my Chippendales Aerobics tape more, too.  I feel like I am seated too much at work (at INTER MEDIA in Encino) and at PLATT COLLEGE-Graphic Art school.  There just aren’t enough hours in the day sometimes.   We all have to prioritize our time for what is most important.  When school is over next month I can breathe easier.
I received a cool Black and White card from Dorothy Rua of a couple making out in a car.  It was a cute scene.   Dorothy wrote:1-9-91Hi Michael, This is not the card I originally planned to send you today but I can’t find the other one, so what the heck—why not start the NEW YEAR with a bang (no pun intended). Ha!How is life treating you these days?  Are you still enjoying evening classes?  No matter how much you like it you must be looking forward to the free time next month.  I know I’ve said it befoe but I just don’t know how you’ve managed to keep up with that schedule!  Well, it’s all part of your future (near future, I hope) plans, so it all must be worth it.
Are you able to enjoy any social life?  You know what they say about all work and no play.  Make sure you work some “balance” into that busy life of yours…   Look who’s talking?  The person who assured herself that she would make sure 1991 brought (brings) balance to hers!   It’s still early though.  I still plan to find a way to enjoy more of what life has to offer.
Speaking of enjoyment…did you ever get to MALIBU for the horseback ride you talked about on the phone?   I was hoping I could cheer you up, then you started talking about horseback riding and I got depressed!  Ha-ha!  It’s only because I wanted to go, too!  It’s so easy to make you (me) feel!  Galloping with the wind blowing through your hair!  About hair…just how long are you going to let yours grow?  I’ve always liked your hair.  Does it look much different?  Yeah, just MORE to like, right?  Ha…send me a picture before you cut it.  I’m curious.
I’m still hanging around PAC TEL; however, I have set up a better relationship.  I told them I was becoming an Independent Contractor.  I would bill them direct for my services.  Larry, the Director, said if it would make me happy it was fine with him.  I have a strong feeling this company will be sold soon (maybe next month).   I may not be there much longer but I plan to collect as much money as I can while I am there!   Why do I always run out of space for all I want to say?  I really miss your wonderful cards and you, of course.   Find some time to write, okay?  Love, Dorothy
Question:  “What memory do you believe you left with the women, with most of them?”Answer:  “Why, without a doubt, a feeling of not having had quite enough.”--COLETTE,
THE PURE AND THE IMPURE

Back To The Old Grind

I find the great contrast between your two occupations positive; the more diverse the life of the mind, the better the chances are that your inspiration will be protected, the inspiration which cannot be predicted, that which is motivated from within.--R.M. Rilke to Elisabeth Ephrussi (in a handwritten letter)from THE HARE WITH THE AMBER EYES by Edmund de Waal
I am feeling “swamped” with my Account Manager job at INTER/MEDIA in Encino.  I am back to the old grind. I am working in ‘the valley’ as they call it.  I do find that working in this area is different from the Westside of Los Angeles.  I feel detached.   Then I drive five days a week to the Eagle Rock area of Pasadena to Pasadena for Graphic Design School at PLATT COLLEGE.   The Graphic Design classes will be over in February.   This will be a welcome relief.   Then what?   It’s not like I will suddenly become CREATIVE DIRECTOR at INTER/MEDIA.   That job is filled and it doesn’t seem like something I want for myself now.  I can’t even see myself as a Graphic Artist doing jobs for clients that I don’t really want to do.  
Alan was nice enough to offer me a job to design a brochure for his Apartment Building in Seattle.   This will be incorporated with my last class assignment.  I’m looking forward to doing that project.  I am required to find an outside 'paying' Graphic Arts-related job.  I'm lucky that Alan has allowed me to do this.
I have no time to write letters like I used to do.  I wish I did.  It allows me to reconnect and evaluate my current happenings. 
I wish I had time to get a haircut; however, it’s a good time to test the waters to see how long I can get my hair to grow.  I’ve always wanted long, long hair—but never seem to reach that point.   The hot summers entice me to cut all of my hair off.  My hair grows so fast. 
My six year old niece, Ashley, sent me a postcard to thank me for the Christmas gifts I sent to her and her sisters (Holly and Ally).   That was a super sweet find in my mailbox.   She sent a postcard of Emerald Bay in Lake Tahoe.  I assume she went there for a weekend with her parents recently.
During my drives to work and school I listen to NEWS via the radio in the morning.  In the evening I find myself listening to music.   The songs that seem to be playing a lot right now are by MADONNA (Justify My Love), JANET JACKSON (Love Will Never Do Without You) and SURFACE (The First Time).   I think I really like the MADONNA one the most.  I like the beginning about kissing in Paris and holding hands in Rome.   The lyrics:
I wanna kiss you in ParisI wanna hold your hand in RomeI wanna run naked in a rainstormMake love in a train cross-countryYou put this in me, so now what, so now what?Wanting, needing, waitingFor you to justify my love
Hoping, prayingFor you to justify my loveI want to know you, not like thatI don't wanna be your motherI don't wanna be your sister eitherI just wanna be your loverI wanna be your baby, kiss me, that's right, kiss meWanting, needing, waitingFor you to justify my love Yearning, burningFor you to justify my loveWhat are you gonna do? What are you gonna do?Talk to me, tell me your dreams, am I in them?Tell me your fears, are you scared?Tell me your stories, I'm not afraid of who you are, we can flyPoor is the man whose pleasures dependOn the permission of anotherLove me, that's right, love meI wanna be your baby, yeahWanting, needing, waitingFor you to justify my love

I'm open and readyFor you to justify my loveTo justify my loveWanting, to justifyWaiting, to justify my lovePraying, to justifyTo justify my loveI'm open, to justify my love
Look at yourself in the mirror and ask what drives you.--Jim Rogers
A GIFT TO MY CHILDREN:  A Father’s Lessons for Life and Investing

C'est La Vie

“You still have your fingers on the strings, even now.”-Al Pacino as Michael Corleone in THE GODFATHER Part III
Mom said the girls loved the Christmas gifts I sent.  I was happy to know that.   “What are you doing?” Mom asked me on Christmas Day during our phone call.“Well, my friend, Alan, and I are going to see the new GODFATHER Part III movie.  It should be good.”“Oh, I want to see that, too.”
And so…Alan and I saw the film.   There were so many good lines.   Alan liked it when Al Pacino (or Michael Corleone) said:  “Never hate your enemies.  It affects your judgment.”I was neither here nor there about that line.  I usually try to extinguish my enemies out of my life (whenever possible).   Why would I need such negativity?
I kind of liked another line by Al Pacino (or Michael Corleone) when he said:  “Never let anyone know what you’re thinking.”   After all, some things should always be left unsaid, right?
There was another scene when one of the characters named Vincent referred to Michael Corleone as “UNCLE MIKE”.   I liked that as I could identify.  I am “UNCLE MIKE”.   Overall, the film was inspiring and a good end of the trilogy.   Who knows?  Perhaps they’ll figure out a sub-plot for THE GODFATHER Part 4 one day. 
The holiday period allows for more lull time, so Alan and I ended up seeing another film a day or two later.   This time it was a romantic comedy that we really liked called GREEN CARD.   It starred a famous French actor named Gerard Depardieu and that wonderful actress I like named Andie MacDowell.   
The film made me think of Paloma, of course.   We had that period of ‘let’s get married’.   When I laid it on her to JUST DO IT and go to Las Vegas she shunned the idea.   It was only after she went back to France and her VISA had expired that she asked, “Were you serious?”

There was a line in the film when Andie MacDowell said to Gerard, “We don't have to like each other. We just have to get married.”I thought about how Paloma and I really did actually LIKE EACH OTHER.   I always wonder what would have happened if she had just said, “YES” the first time I asked her to marry me.   I guess we can change our lives from just one choice.   
Oh well…C’est la vie(That’s life).
And so now…a new year begins soon:  1991.   What will LIFE bring?  What choices will I make?
People have defining moments, I suppose, especially when they’re children.-Markus Zusak, THE BOOK THIEF