Joshua Becker's Blog, page 64

99 Clutter-Free Gift Ideas

The numbers are a retailer’s dream, but a consumer’s nightmare. The average American will spend $1,250 this holiday season on gifts, travel, and entertainment.

These numbers might be acceptable if the gifts we were buying and the
possessions we were accumulating were actually increasing the happiness
in our lives. But that’s not the case.

Over half of us will receive unwanted gifts this year—a staggering $16 billion wasted on unwanted gifts! Eighteen percent of gifts are never used by the person who receives them and 4 percent are immediately thrown into the trash!

The reality is that our homes are already overcrowded with clutter. In fact, the average American home has 300,000 items inside it. The thought of adding more layers of stuff on top of it? It’s all too much.

What then can we give that won’t add to the clutter problem?

99 Clutter-Free Gift Ideas:



Experiences



Bowling TicketsCarriage RideCity TourComedy ClubCommunity TheaterConcert TicketsDinner Gift CardCharitable DonationEscape RoomFacialFamily VacationHorseback RidingIndoor Rock ClimbingLaser TagManicure/PedicureMassageMini GolfMovie PassOrchestraOvernight CampRound of GolfShooting RangeSki LiftSpa DaySporting EventTheater TicketsTrampoline ParkTravel VoucherWater ParkZoo / Aquarium



Memberships



AAAAmazon PrimeArt MuseumAudibleChildren’s MuseumCommunity PoolDisney+Dollar Shave ClubFarm ShareHello FreshNational ParksNetflixScience MuseumSimplify MagazineState ParksTheme ParkToy LibraryYMCA



Time



BabysitterCar
WashDate
Night OutFamily
Portrait SessionGas
CardHouse
CleanerOil
ChangeParent/Child
DatePersonal
ChefPet
SittingPrepped
MealsProfessional
OrganizerShovelingSunday
BrunchYard
Service



Classes



BakingCake DecoratingCodingCookingDanceForeign LanguageHome BrewingImprovKarateMagicMaster ClassMusicPainting/ArtPhotographyPrivate CoachScuba DivingSportsSwimmingTennisVoiceYoga



Consumables



Baked GoodsChocolatesCoffee BeansCoffee Gift CardDessertsFlowersFruit BasketLocal FoodsMeat/CheesesOlive OilSnack BoxTacosTeaVideo Game Gift CardWine

Why You Don’t Need More Time for Self-Care

Note: This is a guest post from Randi Kay of Naturally Randi Kay.

In a world where time seems more precious than gold and making to-do lists are now on our to-do list, it can feel like every second of our spare time is called for.

In this scenario, the idea of making time for ourselves can feel overwhelming, or even selfish.

But what if there was a better way? What if this whole ‘self-care’ thing was not just another task on your to-do list? What if it was a part of how you operated? Or better yet, what if your self-care actually made you feel like you had even more time?

The term “self-care” has been commandeered by the wellness industry as of late and is often defined by activities ranging from lighting a candle to luxurious spa days. With this mentality, it can be hard to fathom “self-care” as a part of your everyday life. But the good news is that true self-care is more a way of life than something you include on your to-do list.

I define self-care as the act of tuning into your true needs and then acting accordingly. By this, I mean a) you take a moment to check in, b) listen to that wise part of yourself, c) and then act on what you hear.

That may look like items on your to-do list, such as getting a massage, going to therapy, or having a solid morning ritual. But the real magic happens when you bring self-care into your everyday life. And a great way to do this is to make tweaks to your current activities, or self-care power ups, as I like to call them.

Here are some examples of what it could look like:

Let’s start with taking a look at how you start your day. What
are you listening to when you get ready in the morning? Is it some heavy news
story or could it be some music that lifts you up?

How you start your day sets the stage for how the rest of the day will go. So why not jazz up your getting ready routine with things that bring you joy? Save the news and other information consumption for later in the day.

If you have a morning commute, this is a great time for a gratitude practice. Thinking or saying aloud what you are grateful for can put you in a wonderful mindset for taking on your workday or other commitments. There’s a lot of power in leading with gratitude.

Once you get going for the day, the next thing to consider is how
you are going about your daily tasks. If you are sitting at a desk for hours at
a time, take a look at how you are holding yourself. If you are hunched over
and your head is jutting forward, adjust your posture to a more neutral
position and get up and move around regularly. This little tweak alone can save
your body from a lot of aches and pains.

In any task you do, notice how you are breathing. Turn your shallow chest breathing into deep belly breaths. This not only takes tension away from your neck and shoulders, but calms the nervous system and keeps the abdomen healthy. You are breathing anyway, why not make it therapeutic?

Moving to the end of the day, it’s common to want to relax and
veg out with your favorite TV show. If this is something you choose to do, I
recommend powering-up with some gentle stretching while you watch to make sure
your body processes the stress of the day properly. This not only helps you
stretch for longer periods of time, but it also nurtures your body’s needs.

Again, these are just some common examples, but the number of tweaks you can make are endless.

If you are having a hard time knowing what to do, a helpful exercise is something I like to call “This for That.” Think how you can sub out an unhealthy choice for a healthier one. More water and a quick walk in the afternoon instead of another cup of coffee. A mindful breathing break instead of a social media break. Or getting up and talking to your coworkers instead of sending an email.

You really don’t need more time for self-care. You just need to swap something out for it. And these power-ups can make all of the difference. Most of our body pain and life stressors were created by small and simple habits overtime. So the best way to heal them is by small and simple habits.

There’s a popular quote floating around the internet that states, “We are what we repeatedly do.” And while the internet can’t decide on who actually said it, no one’s debating its truth. Why not make sure what we repeatedly do serves us?

And remember, it’s not always about what you do, it’s how you are doing it. Changing how you do something can make that task less draining and less stressful, giving you more energy to do more meaningful things.

Imagine if you weren’t so maxed out by the end of the day. It would feel like you had more time and energy to play with your kids, gather with friends, or do other acts of self-care that you enjoy.

Embrace the small and simple. Let your daily habits serve you. And trust that you have all of the time in the world to be happy and healthy.

***

Randi Kay is a Holistic Health Practitioner based out of Fargo, North Dakota. Along with her local healing practice, Randi produces the Simple Self Care podcast and offers mentoring and online courses at Naturally Randi Kay.

—

If you would like to read more about Self-Care, our newest issue of Simplify Magazine dives deep into the topic, featuring exerts from all over the world. Find the issue here.

Encouraging Simplicity. Weekend Reads.

Never underestimate the importance of removing stuff you don’t need.

Encouragement provides us with motivation to persevere. It invites us
to dream dreams of significance for our lives. And it begs us to work
diligently with optimism and promise.

Overcoming the pull of consumerism is a difficult challenge
regardless of our stage in life. Simplicity requires encouragement. To
that end, I hope you will find motivation in these articles below.

Each post was intentionally chosen to inspire simplicity in your life. For maximum effect, find a quiet moment this weekend and enjoy them with a fresh cup of coffee or tea.

I’m Done with Stuff | No Sidebar by Heather Aardema. I’ve found a path I’m passionate about and in the process I’ve lost my desire for massive quantities of mass-produced stuff.

The Ultimate Productivity Hack is Saying No | James Clear by James Clear. No is a decision. Yes is a responsibility.

‘The Best Thing You Can Do Is Not Buy More Stuff,’ Says ‘Secondhand’ Expert | NPR by Terry Gross. Your average thrift store in the United States only sells about one-third of the stuff that ends up on its shelves. The rest of the stuff ends up somewhere else.

The Way of Less | Zen Habits by Leo Babauta. The modern world is one of more, more and still more. What would it be like to declutter our lives and live with less?

Everything You Don’t Need for a Perfect Holiday | YouTube

How to Restore Gift-Giving Sanity

According to the National Retail Federation, the average shopper in America will spend $1,047.83 during the winter holiday season (mainly Christmas) on gifts and other seasonal items.

Keep in mind, this is not the only time of year we receive gifts. Most of us receive several presents for our birthdays as well. Not to mention, all the other gift-giving occasions throughout the year: Valentine’s Day, Easter, Mother’s and Father’s Days, wedding anniversaries, baby showers, housewarming, graduation, recovery from sickness or surgery, thank-you’s, baptism, confirmation, other special occasions, and sometimes “just because.”

That’s a lot of stuff coming into our homes from well-meaning friends and family. Multiply those occasions by the number of people in your family and you’ve got a formula for a whole lot of stuff entering your home!

Now, I think gift giving can be a beautiful thing. And I would never want to hurt anybody’s feelings, if it could be helped. But if you’re determined to avoid over-accumulation of physical possessions in your home, then you’re going to have to manage both sides of the gift-giving traffic in your home.

Here are a few ideas:

1. Tell your friends you don’t need a gift.

If you let them know you’d rather get together in person, that’s better than getting yet another decorative candle or coffee mug you don’t need. Change the gift-giving expectation.

2. Request quality over quantity.

If requesting no gifts is going to be a tough sell with some people in your life, encourage them to purchase quality over quantity. This is especially helpful when influencing gifts given to your children. Two $25 gifts are usually less clutter than five $10 gifts.  

3. Ask for consumables instead of non-consumables and experiences instead of material goods.

A fruit basket, a gift certificate to a restaurant, movie passes, a bouquet of flowers, show tickets—these are great gifts that don’t burden your home with new possessions.

4. Suggest donations to charities on your behalf.

It feels great to know that the money that could have gone toward a new sweater you don’t need instead went to a school scholarship that changed the life of a child.

5. Let people know what you actually need.

Even after minimizing, you may have some genuine need for new items in your home, such as a coffeemaker to replace the one that died last week. Let people know ahead of time what your real needs are; be specific. Gift lists can be particularly helpful for out-of-town family members, especially when ever-growing and changing kids are involved.

6. Purge guilt free.

As the value of the gifts you receive begin to reveal themselves, eliminate the unwanted ones without feeling guilty about it. You’ve expressed your appreciation for the sentiment—you’re not obligated to hold on to the object forever. Nobody wants to burden you with a gift.

This Giving Tuesday, Be A Hero For Hope

Over the last few days, there has been a big focus on buying—spending money trying to get (allegedly) the best deals. The days following Thanksgiving, including Black Friday and Cyber Monday, are some of the busiest shopping days of the year.

I always find it ironic that we give thanks for what we have on Thanksgiving, and then immediately turn around and purchase more items we most likely don’t need.

Thankfully, after Black Friday and Cyber Monday comes Giving Tuesday. Today, people across the globe are celebrating and practicing generosity, and we have the opportunity to give something priceless.

This Giving Tuesday, you can provide the love of a family for orphaned children around the world!

The
Hope Effect

This month marks the four-year anniversary of The Hope Effect—the nonprofit organization I launched in November 2015 with incredible support from the Becoming Minimalist community. The Hope Effect’s mission is to change the way the world cares for orphans.

In developing nations, orphans are often raised in institutional care, which can have damaging effects on children. When children are raised in institutions, they don’t receive enough personal interaction within a loving environment. As a result, development is stunted and learning abilities are delayed or lost.

The research on this has been known for decades. Yet there are very few nonprofit organizations trying to solve the problem.

Without a doubt, there is a better way. Children belong in families.

That’s why The Hope Effect is working to pioneer and expand family-based orphan care around the world. After four years of existence, because of your support, we are currently working in several locations in both Mexico and Honduras.

Our model of care mimics the family structure, with two parents and no more than 6-8 children in a household. This allows children to receive more individual attention while growing up in a stable, family environment.

Under this type of loving care, children flourish and thrive. And children like Ricardo*, a young boy in Chihuahua, Mexico, are able to heal and learn what it means to be part of a family.

Ricardo’s
Story

Ricardo was abandoned at a hospital by his 16-year-old mother immediately after he was born. Without a family—without even a name—he was assigned to the child protective services in Chihuahua. For the next several months, Ricardo was cared for in an orphanage.

As a newborn in an institution, Ricardo’s physical, emotional, and cognitive development were severely delayed by the lack of connection with a family. He began forgetting when and how to cry because crying got him nowhere—there was simply no parent available to comfort him. He didn’t know how to express pain or joy, because nobody reacted to his emotions.

Thankfully, Ricardo’s life was changed through The Hope Effect’s work in Chihuahua. When he was ten months old, he was welcomed into a home and began receiving family-style care. Ricardo was loved and cared for like never before, and the healing process began.

He bonded with the family and started reacting to their love and attention. For the first time, Ricardo was gaining ground with his physical and emotional development.

But that’s not where the story ends! Ricardo remained with
that family for the next 18 months, and he transformed into a loving, active,
and funny little boy. Recently, Ricardo found his adoptive family and was able
to bond and connect with them immediately. He recently joined his forever
family and is excited about his new life!

Ricardo’s story would have been very different without the
loving family-style care that got him out of the orphanage and into a family. And
there are countless children like Ricardo in Chihuahua still in need of a
family.

These children need heroes. They need someone to step in and change the way the world cares for orphans.

Be
a Hero For Hope on Giving Tuesday

If you want to make a difference in the lives of children
like Ricardo, we invite you to join us today in celebrating Giving Tuesday. You
can be a Hero For Hope and help more orphans and vulnerable children find
loving families.

If you partner with us today, your donation will go toward changing more lives in Chihuahua. You will be a hero to the many children in that city who are longing for the love of a family.

And in honor of Giving Tuesday, one of The Hope Effect’s generous supporters has offered to match every donation made today… up to $25,000! That means your gift—and your impact—will be doubled today. If we reach the entire match amount, our project in Chihuahua will be fully funded for an entire year and many more Ricardo’s will be cared for in a family environment.

There are two quick, easy, and secure ways to give:

Online. Visit our Giving Tuesday donation site . (Available for U.S. and all international donors).Text. Text hopeeffect (make sure it’s all one word) to 444-999 and follow the instructions. (Currently available for residents of U.S. or Canada only).

The Hope Effect is a 501(c)(3) organization, so your donation is tax-deductible within the U.S. If you have additional questions about The Hope Effect, send us an email. We are passionate about our mission and we’d love to chat with anyone who would like to learn more.

Thank you so much for supporting The Hope Effect’s mission over the last four years. I can’t believe all that it has become. In fact, I will be traveling to Mexico this coming Saturday for a Christmas party with orphaned children in San Luis Rió Colorado, Mexico and can’t wait to see them again.

You truly are a hero to so many children around the world. You are changing lives, and together, we are changing the way the world cares for orphans. I hope you will join us today.

*Name has been changed to protect the privacy of the child.

You Are More Than a Consumer

If you watch the news, you begin to see, in our society, how people are often considered as mere consumers. Many of our success metrics are based on consumerism: Consumer Spending, Consumer Confidence, Consumer Price Index, Retail Sales, Manufacturing, etc.

If you turn on social media, you begin to see the same thing—especially today on Black Friday. For the past month, we have been treated to a never-ending onslaught of commercials and advertisements promising this store’s Black Friday sale is the best. Or the item on sale at that business is the one that will result in the most smiling faces on Christmas morning.

If you open your mailbox (digital or physical), again you are told that you are a consumer first and foremost. You are offered credit cards and mortgage approvals and coupons and junk mail fliers from countless local and not-so-local businesses.

Even around our own dinner tables, we treat each other as consumers. At Thanksgiving, the conversation quickly moves from gratitude to shopping: What item will you be purchasing on Black Friday this year? What are you hoping to get for Christmas? What are you buying for your daughter? Do you know what so-and-so just bought? What is the hot new toy this holiday season?

But I want to remind you today:

You are more than a consumer.

Consumerism does not need to define your life. You are so much more than that:

You are a human being who is designed for significance and meaning. Maybe you desire adventure and travel… or maybe you prefer a quiet evening at home. You will search for joy in different places, but you are designed to discover it.

You are a husband or wife faithful and committed to your partner, doing your best to create a loving, safe family and home.

You are a mother or father involved in your child’s life, wanting only the best for them. Or maybe you are a grandparent enjoying this season of life more than you ever thought possible.

You are a creative who desires to paint, write, knit, sculpt, or invent. When you do, you spread joy to those around you.

You are passionate about your work. Maybe you are a schoolteacher, a janitor, a banker, a dentist, or a policeman. In any regard, you use your talents and passions to serve others every day.

You are involved in nonprofit work. You are passionate about orphaned children, education, the environment, your faith, or animals in need. You volunteer, you give, and you make the world a better place because of it.

You are a trusted friend. People share their lives with you… and you with them. You are the first phone call when someone is in need and the first to show up when an emergency has occurred.

You are a college student trying to make sense of your next step in the world. You are learning as much as you can right now about the world around you so you can make the biggest difference in it going forward.

You are a vital part of your community. You help at your daughter’s school, you volunteer at your church, you coach your son’s baseball team, or you help organize your neighborhood picnic every Spring.

In every imaginable way, you are more than a consumer!

Over the next several weeks, marketers (and even society) will try to convince you to become a consumer once again. They know you are more than that, but they will return to all the old messaging yet again.

Want to be a loved mother this Christmas? Buy this toy!

Want to be a great husband this year? Buy this gift!

Want to be grandmother of the year? You can get the greatest
number of toys at our store!

Want to be a good friend? Buy this pre-packaged gift set!

Want the perfect Christmas morning? Make sure you spend enough money to achieve it!

Want to find true joy? It’s on sale here… and 50% off today!

Don’t fall into their trappings and false truths. You are so much more than a consumer. That is not how your life will be measured.

You are flesh and blood and soul and heart. Your greatest desires and dreams will never be found at a department store.

You don’t need more physical possessions to be the best you
that you can possibly be. In fact, you probably need less.

To be the best dad, wife, friend, grandmother, community member… human being… that you can possibly be, remember that you were designed for greater pursuits than consumerism. And then have the courage to craft a life around those pursuits—regardless of how society seeks to define you.

How to Save $1,047 This Black Friday

The average American will spend $1,047.83 this holiday season. And Black Friday (the busiest shopping day of the year) is the official beginning of the spending.

In fact, over 160 million shoppers will buy something over the five-day holiday weekend. But the entire premise of Black Friday is based on the foundation of selling us things we don’t need.

If you don’t need an item on Thursday… why would you need it on Friday?

Or… what makes Black Friday any different than last Friday? If you didn’t need an item in your life last week, why would it be suddenly needed this week?

And yet many of us will succumb to the cultural expectation of shopping on Black Friday spending over $1,000 this weekend unnecessarily buying things we don’t need, adding to the collection of unneeded items already cluttering up our closets, drawers, basements, and garages.

Look around your home, you already have everything you need. If you really did need something, you already went to the store and bought it—well before a special Friday randomly placed after a holiday in November.

Your family already has everything it needs.

The things we buy on Black Friday are, almost by definition, things we don’t need. Only in America do we wait in line and push past others to buy items one day after giving thanks for everything we already have.

All those Black Friday ads you keep seeing—they are only there to convince you to buy something you don’t need.

And that’s exactly how they do it. Every advertisement, at its core, seeks to convince you that you will be happier if you buy whatever they’re selling. They stir up discontent and work to convince us that our lives will be happier, more convenient, more luxurious, or more impressive if we buy what they are selling.

The goal of advertising is to change our minds about what we need. As a result, what seemed entirely unnecessary last year has become this year’s must-have product.

But if it wasn’t needed last year, it isn’t needed this year.

How do we save our hard-earned money during Black Friday? We turn off the noise.

We turn off the messaging that is directly designed to convince us to buy things we don’t need.

This holiday season, rather than entertaining all the offers that will arrive in your email inbox, unsubscribe from as many retailer emails as you possibly can.

And see how much you save—not just financially, but in your humanity.

At the bottom of every email you receive this week announcing the biggest and best Black Friday sales, you will find a small sentence (usually in the fine print) that says, “To unsubscribe, click here.”

Go ahead, click unsubscribe. And turn off the noise.

At first, the project will seem unwinnable. But trust me, it is a battle you can win—and will be happier when you do.

At first, you might be clicking dozens and dozens of “unsubscribe” buttons every day. But slowly, the number of advertisements you receive in your inbox will get less and less. You may click 50 emails the first day… 40 emails the second day… 30 emails the third day… but you will be surprised how quickly they begin to subside.

When they do, you will discover a new level of peace and contentment in your life. You will discover a new approach to the holiday season.

Rather than being constantly bombarded with pictures of all the things you don’t have, you will be reminded of all the blessings you do have.

Thanksgiving will no longer become a day to map out your shopping path for Black Friday. Thanksgiving will become a day to give thanks for your blessings. Besides, if you are not content today, there is nothing you can buy this weekend to change that.

As you unsubscribe from the constant barrage of emails telling you that you don’t have enough, you will feel less manipulated. You will feel more like a human and less like a consumer.

And you’ll save $1,047 in the process.

Inspiring Simplicity. Weekend Reads.

F ill your life with stories to tell, not stuff to show.

The simplicity/minimalism movement is a beautiful community. And I enjoy any opportunity to promote writing that encourages people to live more by owning less.

So fix yourself a nice warm cup of coffee or tea. Find a quiet moment this weekend. And enjoy some encouraging words to inspire more simplicity in your life today.

‘Anything you want, take it’: A downsizing party after 45 years in the same house | Washington Post by Petula Dvorak. The idea came to the Mulhausers as they contemplated the enormous task of moving decades’ worth of stuff.

9 Minimalist Bloggers Answer the Question, “What’s the Hardest Part About Minimalism?” | Abundant Life with Less by Rachelle Crawford. What is the hardest thing you’ve had to do on your minimalism journey?

You’re spending your free time wrong — here’s what to do to be happier and more successful | CNBC by Cory Stieg. Seven things to think about when deciding which types of experiences to invest your time and energy in.

The Minimalist Mindset Strategy Guide | No Sidebar by Caitie Wiersma. “Momentum begets momentum, and the best way to start is to start.”

7 Pieces of Financial Advice That Changed My Life Forever | Joshua Becker on YouTube

Keeping Up with the “Joneses”

Rather than trying to “keep up with the Joneses,” try to “keep up with the person you want to be.”

It is, almost certainly, different than the life the Joneses are living.

Society has an interesting affect on us. Too often, it calls us to conform. Think of the changing styles and how quickly the masses adopt them.

We follow the new fashions. We watch the same shows and movies and read the same books. We buy the same automobile styles. We conform to modern styles of furniture, countertops, decorations, and even appliances.

“Keeping up with the Joneses” is, by its very nature, a pursuit of conformity. We want what they have, or buy what others are talking about, or click-to-ship the same product everyone else is buying on Black Friday.

But one of the rarely mentioned side effects of conforming to the life that others are living (what we buy, how we spend our time, and what we desire to have) is the complete and total loss of individuality.

But deep down, do we even want those things? Do we even want to change our clothing styles? Or buy the new car… or boat… or bigger house in the gated community?

Or would we much prefer our own life and our own choices? Wouldn’t we much prefer to pursue our own values? Because almost certainly your values are different than the Joneses!

When we take control of our life and begin pursuing the life we want to live, we discover the best way to overcome envy and jealousy of others is to live a life consistent with our values. 

When our time and money are spent on things we consider important, we find an inner peace and calm that allows us to experience sufficiency, regardless of how much others have (or how they spend it). When our resources are spent on pursuits that bring us fulfillment, we find fulfillment.

Will others have more? Absolutely. But when we are doing the best we can with the resources we have, it results in the confidence and peace that the Joneses have probably been chasing all along.

Live your life ignoring conformity. Pursue those things that bring you fulfillment and significance and meaning.

Rather than trying to “keep up with the Joneses,” try to “keep up with the person you want to be.”

You certainly won’t get there trying to live the Joneses’ life.

How to Make This Season the Best Season of Your Life

Our lives are a progression of seasons.

Some seasons of life are long: elementary school, parenting young children, grand-parenting, or caring for a spouse as they near the end of life. Other seasons of life may be short (life change can happen in the blink of an eye).

Regardless of their length or how a particular change in
season came about, as Eleanor Roosevelt once wrote, “Every age is an undiscovered
country.” Each season brings unique joys and challenges.

Many people have been asked, “What is the best season of
life?” And the answers vary: some loved their college years… or when their
children were young… or when their children left the house… or when they
retired.

When I consider the many varied answers to the same question, I am reminded that there is a unique joy to be found in every season of life. Every season holds potential and opportunity and adventure.

And every season contains the potential to be the one we enjoy the most. It is up to each individual to choose. Why not this one?

There is a present joy in our current season and there is no reason it cannot be the most enjoyable one. But how do we accomplish that?

Here is how we make this season of life our best season:

1. Accept the change in culture happening around you.

The only constant in life is change. As the seasons of our life change, so does culture. And it is always helpful to make the best use of those changes.

If we continually long for the “old days” when we used to be
able to ________, or the world was more ______, or young people didn’t
_________, we’ll never experience the joy of the present moment!

When I was younger, I had dinner with a successful real
estate agent easily in his 60’s (maybe even older). He made a passing reference
to a social media site and something he had seen while on it.

“Wait,” I responded, “you’re on that social media platform?”

“Oh yes,” he said, “I try to stay current and educated on
all the new advancements in social media.”

I made a decision that day that I would work to be the same type of person when I got older. I don’t want to become the old man who constantly complains about the state of the world. I’d much rather be the old man who understands the world and sees the benefits of it (and possibly the drawbacks). Certainly, as a parent of teenagers, it is wise for me to know the current iterations of social media and so I am familiar with all of them.

Given the option of staying current with the changes in the world or being left behind, I’ll choose staying current every time.

2. Recognize the change happening inside you.

As the seasons of our life change, there are more changes happening than just the world around us. There are also changes happening inside of us.

Our bodies change, our worldviews change, our wisdom grows (hopefully), and our abilities increase or decrease. Sometimes we are growing in our abilities and skills and sometimes they are being taken from us.

Recognizing those changes, accepting that they are occurring,
and adjusting our lives because of them are essential to fully enjoying our
present life.

As we enter later seasons of life, we lose physical abilities,
but have certainly gained experience. And of course people develop at different
times and learn to overcome obstacles at different points, but the longer we
live, the more we have learned and overcome.

When we are in younger seasons of life, what we lack in
experience, we are often able to make up for with energy, passion, and drive to
succeed. Our minds are also less made up and we are more open to new ideas. Change
happens around us, but also inside us.

The more we recognize and accept the changes taking place in
our bodies, the more likely we are to make the most of the current season.

3. Do not be defined by past mistakes.

Sometimes the mistakes that mark our past are the result of our own foolish choices. But sometimes they are the result of someone else committing harm to us.

Either way, allowing mistakes in the past to negatively define
your present is a mindset that must be overcome.

If the mistakes of your past are your own doing, remember
that you cannot change those decisions. They have been made and the harm cannot
be undone. But you can redeem the past by learning from it! The past can become
your servant if you learn life lessons from it that make you a better person in
the future.

If the mistakes in your past are from the doing of somebody else, I am sorry that happened. People can be cruel. But that person does not need to harm your present as well. I don’t know what it means for you to turn that harm into good, but it usually contains leveraging your pain to help others.

I have a friend who was reluctantly drawn into divorce by a
spouse who could not overcome PTSD. She could have become bitter and angry, but
she did not. Quite the opposite in fact. She currently volunteers assisting
people with PTSD repair their lives. Rather than allowing her pain to
negatively affect her today, she has turned it around for good and is making
the most of her current season in life—even if it is one she would not have
chosen for herself.

4. Identify the joys in your current season.

Oh, to look around and recognize the simple joys that surround us each day! Is there a more blessed discipline in life?

Every day, joys surround us. And the more we stop to recognize them, the more we appreciate them and the day in front of us.

That is one of the reasons gratitude is such an important
discipline. The more we practice it (in the good times and the bad), the more
we experience joy and meaning and fulfillment.

Identify the unique joys of your present season:

The opportunity to focus undivided attention on your education.The excitement of a young marriage.The precious first smile of your newborn daughter.The maturing son as he becomes a young man in front of your eyes.The opportunity to serve or give or travel that your empty nest now offers you.Or even the final few months with your loving spouse as death draws ever closer.

5. Honor your past, but don’t overburden your present
with it.

My past has made me the person I am and I never want to forget it or the people who have made me. I am thankful for my past in every imaginable way, I’m just not moving in that direction.

I do not honor my past by allowing it to burden my present. In fact, I most honor my past by living my best in the present. This can be seen most vividly in the physical possessions we carry from one season to another.

I encourage people to live more by owning less. When we remove the burden of unneeded physical possessions, we uncover time, money, energy, and opportunity to pursue greater passions.

Inevitably, during my conversations with people, I will be
asked about possessions from a past season of life. “What do I do with my
grandparents’ __________?” “My spouse passed away, how do I handle his
____________?” or “My children are now grown, but I can’t seem to part with
their old __________?”

On each occasion, I gently remind the person that their present obligation is to live their best life today. In fact, we honor our past relationships most by making the most of our present opportunities.

If I were to pass away, I’d sure love my wife to keep
something that reminds her of me, but I would never want to burden her future
seasons with my old things! In fact, I’d be upset if I found out she was
holding on to my old things out of a feeling of obligation. I hope she would
look fondly on her season of life being married to me, but she has entered a
new one. And I’d want her to live her best life today, not carry unneeded possessions
(or burdens) forward.

6. See trials as opportunity to grow.

Every season of life contains special and unique joys. But there is no perfect world, there is no perfect person, and there is no perfect season of life. Every season contains unique obstacles and trials.

It is easier said than done, but when we see the trials in
life as opportunities to grow, even trials can be welcomed (or at least, better
understood).

I would wish no trial on any person, nor would I ever wish
them upon myself. But the reality remains that success is a terrible teacher.
We grow most when faced with obstacles, hurdles, and trials of every kind.

There is no doubt your present season is requiring you to confront new challenges, but that doesn’t mean you cannot also enjoy this period—even working to make it the best one of your life no matter the trial you are currently facing.

7. Give what you can to younger generations.

There are very few obligations that I believe apply to every person alive. But it seems to me, one such obligation is to pass on to younger generations the lessons we have learned in life. Some lessons we learned with great difficulty, some came easy to us, but each are valuable to those who will come after us. This is the only way society moves forward.

If you want to make the most of your current season of life,
consider what talents, abilities, and wisdom you have collected that can be
passed on to younger generations.

Be present in your child’s life. Mentor a young ambitious worker in your career field. Get involved in your community or church or local school. There are even nonprofit organizations dedicated specifically to help you mentor those who need it most.

Give to others in some way. That is the best way to make the
most of life… and it’s the best way to enjoy each season of life along the way.

Each new season of life is an adventure. And every adventure
is meant to be enjoyed. You might as well enjoy this current one the most.