Golda Poretsky's Blog, page 9

How Can I Love My Body When It Continues To Betray Me?

Last week, I received an email that I think will resonate with you. Here’s what it said:

“How can I love my body when it continues to betray me? First I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in 1990. In 2003 I found a protocol to reverse it (which works) and I thought my troubles were over. Then in 2006 I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. This after dealing with underlying depression since 12 years old. I am on anti-depressants, medicine for all the previous listed, plus allergy meds, asthma meds, and I have Herpes which I’ve had since 86. I have to take meds daily for it because my immune system is so compromised that my body will have break-out after break-out without the meds. So I repeat how can I love my body?”

I don’t know about you, but in reading this email, I really felt this woman’s pain.

I felt her despair and her overwhelm.

Of course, I can’t really know what it’s like to be her, but I know I’ve been in similar shoes. And I know I’ve asked myself this same question many times.

So let’s look at some practical steps that you can take if you feel like your body is betraying you.

Your Body Is Actually Doing A Great Job

This may be really, really hard to hear, but your body is actually doing a great job.

There may be some people who won the genetic lottery and have very little stress and therefore don’t get sick much or have chronic problems. But most people that I encounter have some sort of chronic problem or physical difficulty, if not multiple ones.

Your body is doing the best it can to keep you alive and healthy. Your heart is pumping, your lungs are taking in oxygen, your immune system is doing the best it can to fight diseases.

Your body is really trying. It’s not a bad body. Maybe it’s got more issues than you’d like it to have, but it’s not doing anything to you on purpose. It may feel as though it’s betraying you, but it hasn’t, and it can’t. It’s hardwired to do the best it can.

Thinking that your body is betraying you can actually be harmful. Think about it–if you feel betrayed by your body, then you feel like you’re at odds with your body. Instead of feeling like you and your body are one (which is true), you feel like you’re in conflict, which increases your stress levels, and is not helpful to you/your body at all.

Shift The Focus

Once you let go of the belief that your body is betraying you, you can start to feel love for your body.

Writer Wayne Dyer often says that “you are more than what bothers you.” Similarly, your body is more than what bother you about it.

Start by loving the things about your body that don’t bother you. You can love your body for keeping you alive, for doing its best, etc. If you feel like you have a little more energy than yesterday, allow yourself to feel love for your body for this increased energy. Feel love for small changes, moments that feel good, etc.

You might then start to send love to organs that are having some difficulty. You can send love to your pancreas, your sinuses, etc. The simplest way to do this is to say it aloud or think it. Say, “I love my pancreas” and imagine a loving energy surrounding it and bolstering it.

If this feels like an impossible task, keep reminding yourself that you’ve been NOT loving your body for a long time and it hasn’t been helpful. Keep reminding yourself that this is an experiment, one that you’ve been longing for for a long time.

Slowly become accustomed to how it feels to love parts of your body. Over time, this will become your default way of thinking about your body.

Click to tweet: “Your body is more than what bothers you about it.”

Allow For Possibility

Our letter writer noted something that shouldn’t be glossed over.

She writes, “In 2003 I found a protocol to reverse it (which works) . . .”

So a problem she was dealing with for 13 years actually had a solution that she was able to find. After 13 years of dealing with fibromyalgia she found something that reversed it and it actually worked.

If we were in a session together, I might ask her about the circumstances of her finding this protocol. What was her thinking at the time? How had she heard about this protocol that actually worked? Why was she open to trying it after 13 years of dealing with a chronic problem?

I could be wrong, but I bet one of the underlying mindset shifts that allowed her to find this protocol was that she allowed for the possibility that there was an answer. She allowed for the possibility that she could support her body in healing itself.

This is a key mindset shift for feeling differently about your body. You must allow for the fact that your experience and knowledge thus far are not the totality of experience and knowledge on the subject of your ailments. You must allow for the fact that your body has healing capacities that may not have been triggered yet. When you allow for possibility, you open up space in your experience, space that you can emotionally inhabit outside of your pain and ailments.

I’m not saying that loving your body is the absolute cure for anything, but I do think it helps open you up to possibilities and makes it easier to treat your body well.

Did this post resonate with you? Let me know what you think by commenting below.

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Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)

REMINDER: Today is your absolutely LAST DAY to submit a picture for the “Embrace Body Love Campaign.” Click here for details!

How Can I Love My Body When It Continues To Betray Me? originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on April 1, 2013.

Taking A Little Break This Week, But In The Meantime . . .

Hey loves,

I’ve decided to give myself a little break this Easter/Passover week, but I’ll be back next week with a blog post that I know will resonate with you.

In the meantime, The Embrace Body Love Campaign is in full swing! If you haven’t sent your photo in yet, please do. All of the details are here: http://www.bodylovewellness.com/2013/03/18/be-a-part-of-the-i-embrace-body-love-campaign-and-my-upcoming-tedx-talk/

You can see the latest additions to the Embrace Body Love Campaign in the slides below.

You can also catch ALL of the AWESOME submissions on Facebook here or Pinterest here.

Embrace Body Love Campaign [see the SlideDeck]

See you next week!

xo,

Golda

Taking A Little Break This Week, But In The Meantime . . . originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 27, 2013.

Be A Part Of The “I Embrace Body Love” Campaign And My Upcoming TEDx Talk!

I still feel sad when I think about all of the years I spent hating my body. I still cringe when I think about some of the things I did to try to change my body, and all of the ways in which I acted against my own self interest when I believed my body was unlovable.

One of the many reasons why I’ve been doing this work for the last five years is that I want to spare others that pain. I want their journey to loving their bodies to be quicker and easier than it was for me.

A few months ago, I was asked to speak about Health At Every Size and body love at this TEDx event. As part of my preparation, I’ve been watching other people’s TED talks, looking at what seems to work about their talks and what doesn’t.

My contribution to the campaign. As you can see, it doesn’t have to be fancy. :)

One of the things that struck me is that I’m going to this event trying to represent a piece of a much bigger movement.

This work that we’re doing together is, obviously, so much bigger than me, and so much bigger than the community of bloggers, researchers and writers. It’s really about people, like many of you reading this post, who are just trying to live their lives as free as possible from weight oppression and the diet paradigm. It’s about people who want to wear a swimsuit to the pool and have a great time with their family. It’s about people who want feel confident enough in their body to ask for a raise, or a date, or a boundary they need respected.

In short, it’s about you. So I want you to be a part of my TEDx talk.

All you need to do is submit a picture of yourself holding a sign that says, “I embrace Body Love because ____________” and fill in the blank for yourself!

Your picture may be featured on a slide during my TEDx talk. I also hope to feature all of the entries on my site sometime after the event.

Details And Submission Guidelines

WHAT TO DO NEXT: Submit a picture of yourself holding a sign that says, “I embrace Body Love because ____________” and fill in the blank for yourself.

Make sure to use the words “I embrace Body Love” to keep the campaign consistent.
Submit your photo by emailing me here. Your subject line should read “PHOTO SUBMISSION.”
Note in the email where you live (city/town, state, country).
Please attach as large a photo as possible.

DEADLINE: All photos are due by April 1, 2013 at midnight Eastern.

WHO CAN SUBMIT: Anyone who embraces the concept of Body Love. And by the way, that can mean that you’re still working on loving your body. I also want this to be as inclusive as possible, and I’m looking for people of all sizes, ages, ethnicities, gender identities, sexual identities, religious affiliations, etc. Everyone is welcome.

Click To Tweet: “I’m joining @bodylovewellnes’s #embracebodylove campaign!”

TERMS AND CONDITIONS:

1) Only submit photos for which you own the rights.

2) By submitting your photo, you are granting Golda Poretsky and Body Love Wellness a license to use the photo as part of her/their TEDx talk, subsequent talks, blog posts and otherwise on her web site and social media.

3) Golda Poretsky and Body Love Wellness reserve the right to use and not use any of the photo submissions at her/their discretion.

4) By submitting your photo, you agree to these terms and conditions.

One Last Note

I know you may have read this post and thought something like, “I’m sure plenty of people will submit their photos, so what’s one more?” I know that I think things like that sometimes myself.

But your photo is important.

Your photo might be the one that resonates with that young woman watching the talk from her college dorm room who decides to finally eat for the first time that day, or that person contemplating gastric bypass to get rid of their fat, or that little kid contemplating suicide because of the bullying they’re experiencing about their weight. And all it takes from you is a handwritten (or typed) sign and a few snaps with your phone.

Your voice is meaningful and important. Don’t skip this one. Click here to submit your photo.

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)

Be A Part Of The “I Embrace Body Love” Campaign And My Upcoming TEDx Talk! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 18, 2013.

The Body Positive Dating Master Class Isn’t Just For Daters Anymore!

Hi there!

As you may remember, last month I gathered together some really awesome people for The Body Positive Dating Master Class.

The response I got from participants was amazing. But a number of you got in touch with me today you weren’t interested in dating, but would love to hear from our sex experts.

You wanted some fabulous, fat positive advice on how to spice up your sex life with your partners and yourself!

Well, I listened. And I created the “Just Sexperts” package for you folks.

Here’s what you get (click their names to hear more about each speaker):

Virgie Tovar’s 10 Things About Sex You Always Wanted to Know But Were Afraid to Ask (Virgie offers her secrets of anatomy, vibrators, dirty talk, flirtation, orgasms, porn, relaxation and tips on pleasing male-bodied partners.)
Sheri Winston’s Abundant Woman, Abundantly Sexy (Acclaimed sexuality teacher Sheri Winston shows you how you can be a “woman of abundance” who is abundantly comfortable with her sexuality. She’ll also share tips on how to become your own erotic virtuoso (and how that sexual confidence and your erotic ease will attract others).)
Hanne Blank’s The Biggest Sex Organ Is The Brain: Opening Your Mind To Better Sexual Options (Hanne Blank helps you think bigger and better about your sex life — about your body image and body issues in sexual relationships, figuring out what you want and telling your partners about it, letting go of sexual shame, creating opportunities for size-positive sex-positive play, and more.)

These wonderful and empowering talks will have an instant impact on your sex life.

Click here to check out the “Just The Sexperts” option for yourself!

xo,

The Body Positive Dating Master Class Isn’t Just For Daters Anymore! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 12, 2013.

The Deep Spiritual Practice Of Not Giving A Sh*t

Over the years, I’ve written many articles on things like dealing with your negative comments about your body, letting go of comparing yourself to others, handling haters, and so forth. These are some of my most popular articles.

And I know why that is.

You’ve been taught, over and over again, that people’s opinions of you matter.

You’ve been taught that if someone thinks you’re too fat, or too loud, or too smart, or too dumb, or too whatever, or not enough whatever, that they get to have a say in how you feel about yourself.

So I’d like to introduce you to the deep spiritual practice of

Not Giving A Shit.

You may be thinking I’m joking when I say not giving a shit is one of my main spiritual practices, but I’m not.

I got an email a few days ago from a fat massage therapist who wanted to get into health coaching but was worried that people wouldn’t take her seriously as a health coach because she was fat. I introduced her to my deep, spiritual practice.

I had the same concerns when I started coaching. In reality, I’m sure there are people who don’t want to work with me because I’m fat. But there are also tons of people who want to work with me because I’m fat, or my fat is a non-issue.

Learning to not give a shit about the people who don’t want to work with me because I’m fat was key. And if other practitioners see my fat as an issue, I truly, on a deep level, do not give a shit.

If you notice that you’re holding yourself back from doing something you want to do because of other people’s opinions, it’s time to get on board with this spiritual practice.

8,000 Years, At Least, Of Not Giving A Shit

Of course, the deep spiritual practice of not giving a shit has some serious, ancient origins. As Lao Tzu said in the Tao Te Ching approximately 8,000 years ago — “care about people’s approval and you will be their prisoner.”

In other words, if you give too much of a shit, other people get to control your choices.

I may not always use the words “not giving a shit,” and maybe growing up in New York has made me more comfortable and happy with curse words than most people.

But to me, there’s a power in saying, “I don’t give a shit” that I don’t feel when I say, “I don’t care” or “I’m releasing all attachment to so-and-so’s opinion of me.” When I say I don’t give a shit, there’s a power, a forcefulness, and a rebellious quality that I love.

Want to start giving less of a shit? Read on.

Click to tweet: “I embrace the spiritual practice of not giving a shit.”

Starting Your Own Not Giving A Shit Practice

1) Just Say It — Literally say, “I don’t give a shit” more often. Someone thinks you’re too fat to do XYZ? Say, “I don’t give a shit.” Someone won’t acknowledge your feelings about something. Say, “I don’t give a shit.” Someone doesn’t like that you’re saying you don’t give a shit? You can guess what I think.

2) The Energy Bounce — When someone confronts you with a negative judgment or opinion about you, take a moment to picture, imagine, or feel that energy just bouncing right off of you. If it’s an internal judgment that you’re having about yourself, imagine that judgment flowing right out of your body.

3) Feel Love And Gratitude For Those That Support You — Put attention on the people in your life who do support, love, and approve of you. Feel daily gratitude that those people are in your life. As you start to feel more loving and positive about yourself, even just a little bit, give yourself some gratitude for that change.

One Last Note

This spiritual practice isn’t about not loving other people or not caring about their thoughts and feelings. It’s simply about letting go of their judgments and opinions of you.

The question always comes down to, “How much am I going to let someone else’s opinion of me control how I feel about myself and what I do?”

If you want their opinions to have less power over you, you must start to give less of a shit.

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)

In the immortal words of The Dude, “That’s just like, your opinion, man.”

The Deep Spiritual Practice Of Not Giving A Sh*t originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 11, 2013.

Eshakti Review + Promo Code (Plus, A Little Body Image Reminder)

As you folks know, I am not a fashion blogger. So I thought it was kind of neat when Eshakti got in touch with me and asked if I’d like to review an item and get a special promo code for my readers!

Eshakti has a lot of cool stuff, and everything’s so customizable that you can make stuff work for you. I ended up choosing this dress for multiple reasons. It looked comfy (yay for cotton) and it had a lot of the elements that I tend to gravitate toward, like the deep V, empire waist and cute details like ruching. I didn’t modify it all that much, except that I asked for a 3/4 sleeve length.

I got it the other day and I totally love it. I’ve already worn it a bunch of times and I’m contemplating my next eshakti purchase.

If you’d like to check out what eshakti has to offer, go to http://www.eshakti.com and use the code BDYLVEWELL! It’s valid through March 20, 2013.

And if you’d like some support with changing up your wardrobe for a better body image, check out this post!

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

Two notes:

– I received this item for free, but the opinions expressed are my own.

– Please direct all questions about using the code, ordering etc. to eshakti’s wonderful customer service department.

Eshakti Review + Promo Code (Plus, A Little Body Image Reminder) originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 4, 2013.

Being in a Romantic Relationship When You Don’t Feel Lovable

Image credit: creatista / 123RF Stock Photo

You’ve probably heard that old adage more than once, “You can’t love someone until you love yourself!”

Or, as RuPaul says, “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love somebody else?”

Well, if you’re reading this post, you may be proving the adage wrong. In fact, in some ways, when you don’t feel lovable it can actually feel much easier to love somebody else than yourself.

Feeling unlovable isn’t always about body image, so this topic is a little broader than the topics we usually cover here. But I wanted to address it because it’s a topic that comes up often with clients and in the letters I get from readers.

I’ve Been There

Back when I was struggling with negative body image, I had some troubling and complicated feelings about my own lovableness and my “right” to be in a relationship.

I made a lot of choices from this place of feeling unlovable, like putting up with things that I would now characterize as emotional abuse. Feeling unlovable put me in a place of deep scarcity — if I was unlovable, and someone loved me or was interested in me, I should then do everything I can to keep that person, right?

To make things really complicated, I often dated guys who felt unlovable as well. One guy I dated had an online affair with someone else for nearly a year while we were dating. When I found out about it, his excuse was that he felt unlovable and was convinced that I was going to break up with him, so he was hedging his bets by having an online thing with someone else.

Whether what he said was true or not, you can see how just feeling unlovable can negatively affect your relationships.

Lovable ≠ Perfect

Somewhere in your life you got the message that whatever flaws you may have (real or perceived) are impediments to being loved. You may have been told this outright, or internalized societal or familial beliefs.

Thoughts of your unworthiness probably take the form of “I’m too _____” or “I’m not ______ enough.” For example, you may think you’re too fat, too thin, too bossy, too intelligent, too emotional, etc. to be lovable. Or you may have thoughts like, “I’m not attractive enough, smart enough, funny enough, giving enough,” etc.

The thought that you’re too much or not enough will always keep you feeling stuck. And, as I like to say, it sells a lot of product, because we’re always trying to fix these flaws.

We both know that the truth is everyone is flawed. I mean, everyone. So why should your particular flaws keep you from feeling worthy of love?

You’re right. They shouldn’t.

Start Feeling More Lovable

I could try to give you a whole bunch of workarounds for how to deal with being in a relationship while continuing to feel unlovable, but I don’t think that’s the answer.

Ultimately, being happy in a relationship is nearly impossible if you feel unlovable. From what I’ve seen with clients, you’ll either ignore your needs and act from a place of keeping your partner happy rather than yourself, or push your partner away in order to confirm your belief that you’re unlovable. So I want to share a few steps that can help you begin to believe that you are, indeed, lovable.

All of these techniques have made a HUGE difference in my life, so I hope you’ll try at least one.

1) Feel (All Of) The Love — From now on, all the love you receive counts as a sign that you’re lovable. Your partner says they love you — it counts. Your sister tells you she loves you — it counts. Your friend tells you how much fun she has spending time with you –it’s love, and it counts. You get praised at work, the bagel store person give you an extra blueberry bagel on the house — that’s love. It counts.

Keep a journal and note all the times that people express how much they adore you, how happy they are that they’re in your life, etc. Let the list grow.

2) Trust The Love You Receive — This goes along with step #1, but it’s time to trust people when they say they love you or otherwise express their love. If you’re in a relationship and your partner says they love you, take it at face value. Believe it and let yourself feel it.

People like to be agreed with and acknowledged. If someone says they love you, and you say, “No, you don’t,” it doesn’t feel very good for either of you. It’s time to start believing what people express to you. If you have a hard time trusting what your partner is saying, you may want to take a deeper look into (a) whether your partner is actually trustworthy or not and/or (b) whether you have trust issues stemming from past relationships that you may need to resolve.

3) Practice Loving Yourself — Loving yourself can take many forms. You might decide to talk or think lovingly about yourself throughout the day. (You can use phrases like, “I am wonderful” and “I am loveable.”) You could do nice things for yourself, like buy yourself flowers, wear your favorite clothes, give yourself a foot massage, etc.

These sorts of self care practices send a signal to yourself that you are loved and cared for. The more you experience that love from yourself and for yourself, the more you’ll be able to feel it in your relationships.

Don’t forget to sign up for my Free Preview Of The Rewrite Your Body Image Workshop! Sign up for free at http://www.bodylovewellness.com/freeclass.

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)

Being in a Romantic Relationship When You Don’t Feel Lovable originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 4, 2013.

Free Preview Of The Rewrite Your Body Image Workshop!

Do you struggle with getting dressed in the morning? Do you hate to look at pictures of yourself? Do you find yourself stressing out about social events because of how you look?

This may feel really normal to you, but it doesn’t have to be your normal.

Take a moment to imagine yourself feeling great about your body. How would you feel about your day? How would you connect with people?

You don’t need to change your body to feel gorgeous, attractive, and thrilled to be you. You just have to heal the thoughts that are keeping you stuck.

In this 60-minute teleclass, Golda Poretsky, H.H.C. (founder of Body Love Wellness and leading authority on Health At Every Size) will guide you through proven techniques designed to heal negative body image. This is a preview of her upcoming 4-week workshop, Rewrite Your Body Image.

You’ll walk away from this body love centered call with Golda’s surprisingly powerful, yet simple techniques for feeling more comfortable and at home in your body.

Whether you have serious negative body image concerns or just one too many “bad body days”, you’ll get at least 3 BIG insights into how connecting with the divine feminine can heal your relationship with food and your body for good!


Note: Everyone who registers will receive a link to listen to the recording of the class, so you should still register if you can’t make it live!

Just enter your info in the boxes below, and you’ll receive the complete call details via email.

Yes, Golda, please sign me up for this exciting FREE 60-Minute Preview Of The Rewrite Your Body Image Workshop on Wednesday, March 6th at 8PM Eastern/5PM Pacific.
Send me the details at my email address below.

Name:

Email:

Please note, upon registration, you will also receive a complimentary subscription to the Body Love Wellness Newsletter. We will not share, rent or sell your information to any other organization.

Please check your spam folder if you don’t receive a confirmation email.

Free Preview Of The Rewrite Your Body Image Workshop! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on March 1, 2013.

Are You Addicted To Food Or Addicted To Dieting?

Every week, I hear from people who feel like they’re addicted to food.

When you feel like you’re addicted to food, you can’t stop thinking about what you’re going to eat, what you just ate, what you might eat later. You rarely crave the nutrient dense stuff, but rather find yourself thinking about desserts or fast food or just highly processed comfort foods.

You feel anxious, overwhelmed, and desperate for the food you feel addicted to.

When I chat with these folks, every single one of them is on a diet, trying to be on a diet, or, rarely, just decided to stop dieting.

(Seriously, if you know of a “food addict” who’s never dieted, let me know!)

So why might this be? Might there be a connection between dieting and food addiction?

And moreover, might we be dealing with diet addiction instead?

The Real Deal On Food Addiction

So let’s think about addiction to food from a different perspective. What if food addiction is the symptom, and not the problem itself?

Let’s think about what it’s like to be a dieter for a moment. What do you focus on when you’re a dieter? Generally, when you’re on a diet, you’re really focused on food — how much or how little you should eat, what you should or shouldn’t eat, how many calories/points/fat grams etc. are in the food, how the food you eat is affecting your weight. This is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of the things that you might be thinking about all day long.

Just as an example, think about one of your favorite foods that you might not have been able to eat when you dieted. Rate your current craving for that food on a scale of 1 to 10.

Now, repeat to yourself twenty times, “I cannot eat [fill in the blank with that food].” Try to make that thought of “I cannot eat ____” as real as possible for yourself.

Okay, great. Now, take a moment to check in again with how much you’re craving that food on a scale from 1 to 10.

It’s likely that your craving for that food has increased dramatically right now!

This little exercise is an example of what goes on in your head, all day, every day, when you diet. Even if nothing is strictly forbidden on your diet, usually there is enough calorie control or other types of control that would make it impossible for you to eat certain calorie dense foods all the time.

Your reaction to that might be, “It’s good that I can’t eat “bad” stuff all the time! That’s why I’m on a diet.”

But what we’re illustrating here is that when you diet, you actually make it worse for yourself. You make certain foods ultra-desirable and ultra-forbidden, which is painful and can make you feel addicted to “bad” food.

A recent study with rats found that rats who were fed standard rat chow five days a week and high-sugar, chocolaty rat chow two days a week (meant to parallel the restrict/binge cycle of dieters) resulted in some interesting behavior and biochemical responses from the rats. These rats began to only desire the high-sugar stuff, and exhibited a level of anxiety and disinterest in the standard stuff. It appeared that the restriction/diet phase increased their anxiety and led them to overindulge in the “forbidden” food.

Click to tweet: “Food addiction is diet addiction in disguise.”

Is Dieting The Real Addiction?

Let’s take a look at some of the general symptoms of substance abuse addiction and see if they work in a dieting context. These symptoms are tolerance, withdrawal symptoms, focusing activities around the addiction, difficulty limiting the behavior, and preoccupation with the addiction.

1) Tolerance – Generally, as time passes, someone who is addicted to a substance needs more and more of it. Similarly, dieters often become more and more restrictive as time goes on. This makes sense because as weight loss slows down, the high one gets from weight loss and getting approval for weight loss starts to diminish, so the dieter has to become more restrictive and “good” on their diets to get the high.

2) Withdrawal Symptoms — When dieters go off their diets momentarily, they often feel really bad. They have tremendous anxiety about what they should eat and what they have eaten. They often eat their forbidden foods, which makes them feel bad, sometimes physically but often mentally. They beat themselves up for eating “bad” food, feel like they’ve sinned, etc. Because going off the diet can feel so terrible, they have a strong desire to return to dieting and feel “good” again.

3) Activities Become Focused Around The Addiction — Like other addicts, dieters avoid situations where they won’t be able to “use.” Similarly, dieters might avoid parties where the food will be too tempting, and they’re often unable to modify their plans when they fall outside of their rigid food and exercise regimens.

4) Difficulty Limiting Or Controlling The Behavior — I often work with clients who are completely and totally sick of dieting. They’ve read all about Health At Every Size, they know that diets don’t work, and yet, they find the idea of going back to Weight Watchers or trying a new diet overwhelmingly appealing, especially when they’re having a difficult time. This makes sense, since diets hold so much promise, and the high of approval that folks receive from weight loss is so strong. It takes guts and work to remind yourself that dieting is not the answer, even when something within you (and so many outside of you) are telling you that it is.

5) Preoccupation With The Addiction — I won’t belabor this point, but if you’ve ever been a dieter or even hung out with one, you know how preoccupied they are with their diets. They focus on and talk about what they can and can’t eat, what they ate, what they’re going to eat, and so on.

What To Do If You’re Addicted To Dieting

If you’re ready to be done with dieting, it’s important to get support from someone who’s not going to recommend another diet (or a lifestyle plan disguised as a diet) and you are really in the right place. I recommend checking out my Stop Dieting 101 resources, and if you want more support, you might like this home study program or private coaching with me. But the key is to recognize that food is not the problem and another diet is not the answer.

Do you think dieting is addictive? Let me know you’re thoughts in the comments section below!

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Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

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Are You Addicted To Food Or Addicted To Dieting? originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on February 25, 2013.

Rewrite Your Body Image!

Hello my dear!

I’m writing this short post to let you know about a new, online workshop that I’m offering.

It’s called Rewrite Your Body Image and I think you’ll love it.

This is a 4 week, low commitment but high impact workshop where you get to explore and heal from your body image issues using two powerful techniques — creative visualization and writing.

If you love to write (even just in your journal), you will love this course.

Don’t delay, because space is limited and I’m offering some awesome early bird bonuses that you don’t want to miss.

Check it out here: http://www.bodylovewellness.com/rewrite!

xo,

Golda

Rewrite Your Body Image! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on February 21, 2013.