Golda Poretsky's Blog, page 13
October 22, 2012
How To Deal With Positive(?) Comments About Your Body
by Golda Poretsky, H.H.C.
www.bodylovewellness.com
I’ve been promising to write this post for a while now.
A few months ago, I wrote a post about dealing with negative comments. You gave me some really positive feedback on it, but a number of you raised the question of how to deal with positive or seemingly positive comments.
It’s a great question. How do you deal with stuff like:
“You look great. Did you lose weight?”
“You have a great ass!”
“You look gorgeous today.”
Now, these compliments may seem mostly positive or innocuous, particularly the last one. But so much will depend on this one big factor:
Context! Context is everything, right? By context I mean the relationship between the complimenter and the complimentee, and the complimentee’s current and past body image issues.
When Weight Loss Is Tied To A Compliment
I have a somewhat different take on this than you might expect.
I think people are, in some ways, nearly literally blinded by weight loss culture. So when they read something or someone as beautiful they make an automatic connection between beauty and weight loss. I really don’t blame people for that. I think that most of us who have woken up from weight loss culture have been truly hurt by it (or have great empathy for someone close to us who has been hurt by it), so people who haven’t had that experience often just see our current weight loss culture as normal.
So the question becomes, what do you do in the moment? Depending on the context and your relationship to that person, you can handle the compliment of “You look great. Did you lose weight?” in many ways.
Probably Easiest: Say “thanks!” and move on to other things. It’s really not your job to educate anyone about weight bias nor answer any questions about weight loss.
Use Humor: I’m a big fan of using humor, but I’m usually one of those people who thinks of witty retorts when it’s way too late. If you feel comfortable, you can always say something like, “Thanks! But just so you know, I’m still the same gorgeous fatty I was yesterday!” (If you have some good retorts, let me know!)
Set Boundaries: Say something like, “Thanks for the compliment, but I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t comment on my weight or any perceived weight loss.”
Repeat As Desired
People who give inappropriate comments often fall into two camps: (a) they’re completely unaware that their compliments are inappropriate, backhanded, or just plain weird or (b) they don’t really care if they’re being inappropriate.
These two groups are probably two of the hardest groups to set boundaries with. Seriously.
So it’s going to take some repetition if you really want them to change the way they talk to you. And it may actually be impossible. That’s why I’m a big fan of saying thank you and then thinking about other things. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to set boundaries. It may just take a ton of repetition and a great well of patience.
Just Saying Thank You Is Very Powerful
I’m of the opinion that most compliments are really that — someone notices something lovely about you and wants to let you know that they see it. Receiving real compliments can be a healing practice, especially when you haven’t felt consistently good about yourself and your appearance.
You don’t need confirmation from the outside world that you’re a gorgeous person inside and out, but it’s still nice to get it now and again. So I want to share a special practice for receiving compliments. It’s extremely simple but powerful!
How it works:
Complimenter: “You have a lovely smile!”
You: Pause and give yourself a second to receive the energy of that compliment. Then say, “Thank you.”
Complimenter: “You’re welcome.”
Why it’s lovely:
When you actually receive a compliment, both you and the complimenter feel good. It’s a wonderful exchange of positive energy. When you say, “Thank you” you’re basically saying, “I’m receiving that compliment and agreeing with you.”
The complimenter feels good because they gave you a gift that you received and enjoyed, plus they had the pleasure of being agreed with. And you feel good because you received a gift and had the pleasure of feeling recognized and agreed with (since you already know you have a beautiful smile).
When you don’t feel great about yourself or your body, receiving compliments can be extremely difficult. If you’re in this boat, try this practice and let me know how it goes!
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. Check out her upcoming events below!
Ongoing & Upcoming Events With Golda!In Person
November 2-4th, Zion, Illinois — I’ll be leading three workshops at The Abundia Retreat!
November 14th, New York City — I’ll be reading my story, “The Fat Queen Of Speed Dating”, along with other contributors to Hot & Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion at Bluestockings Book Store. (Info is here.)
Online
This Week Only — Free Web Training On Some Of My Most Unorthodox & Powerful Ways To Heal From Food & Body Image Issues (sign up here!)
November 13th — Will be sharing 5 Simple Tips For A More Relaxed (And Fun) Holiday as part of the Happy HAES Holidays Program (check it out)
“I scheduled a session with Golda because I thought she could really help me explore my body issues and learn to love myself how I am. I anticipated spending some time talking about my current body image and some past experiences that have affected it, as well as my goals for the future. Golda helped me map out what my ideas were for how I would like to see myself and treat my body. It was nice using her methods to imagine my future self-image and get some ideas on how to take small steps toward my goals. Anyone who has dreams of having a positive body image, a healthy relationship with food an…”
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How To Deal With Positive(?) Comments About Your Body
Original image credit: fotomagique / 123RF Stock Photo | Text & additional photoshopping by Golda Poretsky
I’ve been promising to write this post for a while now.A few months ago, I wrote a post about dealing with negative comments. You gave me some really positive feedback on it, but a number of you raised the question of how to deal with positive or seemingly positive comments.
It’s a great question. How do you deal with stuff like:
“You look great. Did you lose weight?”
“You have a great ass!”
“You look gorgeous today.”
Now, these compliments may seem mostly positive or innocuous, particularly the last one. But so much will depend on this one big factor:
Context! Context is everything, right? By context I mean the relationship between the complimenter and the complimentee, and the complimentee’s current and past body image issues.
When Weight Loss Is Tied To A Compliment
I have a somewhat different take on this than you might expect.
I think people are, in some ways, nearly literally blinded by weight loss culture. So when they read something or someone as beautiful they make an automatic connection between beauty and weight loss. I really don’t blame people for that. I think that most of us who have woken up from weight loss culture have been truly hurt by it (or have great empathy for someone close to us who has been hurt by it), so people who haven’t had that experience often just see our current weight loss culture as normal.
So the question becomes, what do you do in the moment? Depending on the context and your relationship to that person, you can handle the compliment of “You look great. Did you lose weight?” in many ways.
Probably Easiest: Say “thanks!” and move on to other things. It’s really not your job to educate anyone about weight bias nor answer any questions about weight loss.
Use Humor: I’m a big fan of using humor, but I’m usually one of those people who thinks of witty retorts when it’s way too late. If you feel comfortable, you can always say something like, “Thanks! But just so you know, I’m still the same gorgeous fatty I was yesterday!” (If you have some good retorts, let me know!)
Set Boundaries: Say something like, “Thanks for the compliment, but I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t comment on my weight or any perceived weight loss.”
Repeat As Desired
People who give inappropriate comments often fall into two camps: (a) they’re completely unaware that their compliments are inappropriate, backhanded, or just plain weird or (b) they don’t really care if they’re being inappropriate.
These two groups are probably two of the hardest groups to set boundaries with. Seriously.
So it’s going to take some repetition if you really want them to change the way they talk to you. And it may actually be impossible. That’s why I’m a big fan of saying thank you and then thinking about other things. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to set boundaries. It may just take a ton of repetition and a great well of patience.
Just Saying Thank You Is Very Powerful
I’m of the opinion that most compliments are really that — someone notices something lovely about you and wants to let you know that they see it. Receiving real compliments can be a healing practice, especially when you haven’t felt consistently good about yourself and your appearance.
Click to tweet: “Receiving real compliments can be a healing body image practice.”
You don’t need confirmation from the outside world that you’re a gorgeous person inside and out, but it’s still nice to get it now and again. So I want to share a special practice for receiving compliments. It’s extremely simple but powerful!
How it works:
Complimenter: “You have a lovely smile!”
You: Pause and give yourself a second to receive the energy of that compliment. Then say, “Thank you.”
Complimenter: “You’re welcome.”
Why it’s lovely:
When you actually receive a compliment, both you and the complimenter feel good. It’s a wonderful exchange of positive energy. When you say, “Thank you” you’re basically saying, “I’m receiving that compliment and agreeing with you.”
The complimenter feels good because they gave you a gift that you received and enjoyed, plus they had the pleasure of being agreed with. And you feel good because you received a gift and had the pleasure of feeling recognized and agreed with (since you already know you have a beautiful smile).
When you don’t feel great about yourself or your body, receiving compliments can be extremely difficult. If you’re in this boat, try this practice and let me know how it goes!
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. Check out her upcoming events below!
Ongoing & Upcoming Events With Golda!
In Person
November 2-4, Zion, Illinois — I’ll be leading three workshops at The Abundia Retreat!
November 14, New York City — I’ll be reading my story, “The Fat Queen Of Speed Dating”, along with other contributors to Hot & Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion at Bluestockings Book Store. (Info is here.)
Online
This Week — Free Web Training On Some Of My Most Unorthodox & Powerful Ways To Heal From Food & Body Image Issues
Starting November 13th — Will be sharing 5 Simple Tips For A More Relaxed (And Fun) Holiday as part of the Happy HAES Holidays Program (info coming soon)
Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:
Name:
Email:
(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)
How To Deal With Positive(?) Comments About Your Body originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 22, 2012.
October 18, 2012
A Love Your Body Day Gift For You!
Hey loves!
Happy Love Your Body Day!
I’m very excited to be celebrating with you . . . just a little late.
In honor of this special day (and my birthday tomorrow!) I have a special gift for you.
xo,
A Love Your Body Day Gift For You! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 18, 2012.
October 15, 2012
Do I Really Have To Give Up The Dream Of Being Thin?
Every once in a while, I get one of those emails that nearly knocks me over.
“I am afraid to give up the dream of being thin. I have good days, where I can accept myself and think I am beautiful, but I can never let go of the dream of being thin, and I am afraid that if I fully commit to your methods, I will be a failure, and that no matter how amazing my life is, everyone will know me for a failure if I stay fat.”
Raise your hand if you know what this woman is talking about! (Yes, my hand is up too.)
The dream of being thin is a collective sort of dream. One that we’re sold and told to believe in from such an early age that even just acknowledging it as a dream (and not a truth) is a huge step.
But what do you do with the dream of being thin when, at least intellectually, you know it’s a dream that isn’t worth dreaming anymore?
Do You Have To Give Up The Dream Of Being Thin?
I’ve worked with lots of clients who told me that even though they think Health At Every Size® makes sense, they still want to lose weight. They want to embrace Health At Every Size® and stop worrying about their weight but they don’t feel ready to fully let the concept of weight loss go.
What I tell them may surprise you.
I say, okay. That’s really okay. You don’t have to let go of the dream of being thin or the desire to be thinner. But for the next few days or weeks or months, or even just for today, I want you to just push it to the side a bit. Just shift it over a few inches and try, as much as possible, to try my suggestions.
As I sometimes tell them, dance with the dream. Let the dream be light. Let the dream of being thin be your momentary dance partner, not your boss.
This slight mindset shift can make a big difference.
Clearing The Dream, Finding True Desire
As dreams go, the dream of being thin is really more of a nightmare. The dream of being thin keeps you trapped in patterns that don’t serve you. When you believe the dream, you fixate on your weight and on food, feel good when you lose weight, feel horrible when you gain it back, and since weight gain means you’re moving farther from the dream, you inevitably look for a new weight loss solution again and again.
What’s the dream of being thin really about?
The dream says that weight loss is the ultimate prerequisite, the ultimate key to unlock all of your desires. Want health? A better job? Hotter sex? Beauty? Confidence? The envy of your peers? You’ve been told over and over again that weight loss is always the answer.
Click to tweet this: “Weight loss is not the key to your dreams. The truth is there is no lock and the door is flimsy.”
What no one ever tells you is that the prerequisite is b.s. You can take the advanced class right now. You don’t need the key to unlock the door, the door is flimsy. In fact there is no door! (I know I’m mixing metaphors here. Bear with me!)
So your task, should you choose to accept it, is to ask yourself two questions:
What is the dream of being thin getting me?
What is it that I really want?
Question #1 is actually quite important. It can be scary to realize, but sometimes you hold on to the dream of being thin because pursuing other desires feels kind of scary. You know how to worry about your weight, worry about food, worry about exercise. If you’re anything like I was, you basically have a PhD in dieting right now. It’s hard to leave the world you know, even one you’re sick of, for the world you don’t know. And loving your body, eating intuitively, experiencing better health while fat, experiencing hot sex while fat, and anything and everything else that you want may seem scarier than what you have.
Once you realize what the dream of being thin is or isn’t getting you, you’re able to make a real decision about whether you want to wake up from it or not.
The second question can be scary too. Asking yourself what you really want is a big freaking deal. So I recommend looking at it from a place of fun rather than a place of “have to.”
If Everyone Else Is Caught Up In The Dream, Am I A Failure For Not Going Along?
I want to address the last point from that email above. Are you a failure if you’re happy with your body and everyone else thinks you’re a failure for not losing weight?
To me, that term “failure” is a huge red flag. I know for myself that when I hear it, the inner critic (my own or my client’s) is working on overdrive.
This is another mindset shift that is required for waking up from the dream of being thin. Are you a failure if you don’t lose weight and keep it off? No, you’re just really, really normal.
To me, feeling great in your body, loving it, adorning it happily, engaging with the world in it, denotes a huge success. In essence, when you give up on the dream of being thin, you have to redefine the meaning of success. If success always meant weight loss, what does it mean when weight loss is off the table? Success then becomes a personal question of your own desires and values, and isn’t that what success should really be anyway?
I would love to know what your experience has been with giving up the dream of being thinn(er). Let me know in the comment section below.
Get my body love tips, and start to see your body in a whole new way!
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Email:
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. She is now enrolling for The Big Beautiful Goddess Academy. Click here for details!
(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)
Do I Really Have To Give Up The Dream Of Being Thin? originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 15, 2012.
October 8, 2012
Is Trolling Really Just Bullying? (Plus 3 Tips For Dealing With Cyberbullying)
By now, you’ve probably seen this truly wonderful video, where Jennifer Livingston, a plus sized anchorperson, eviscerated a cyberbully who told her that she was a bad role model because of her weight. (If you haven’t seen it yet, click here to see the video.)
I don’t know about you, but I found her bravery really compelling.
I also thought that her reframing of internet trolling as bullying was really important.
Nowadays, it seems like nearly everyone has dealt with some form of cyberbullying, and it can really take its toll. Over the years, I’ve gotten hundreds of negative, hateful comments and emails from people who are so fatphobic that they feel compelled to try to silence me.
It can definitely take its toll, but I’ve developed some techniques that I’d like to share with you now.
In the video below, I elaborate on these 3 techniques. But in a nutshell they are (1) You’re Not Alone, (2) Ignore/Delete/Block, and (3) They Don’t Boo Nobodies. To see what I’m talking about, click the video below!
(By the way, this video is a part of the Better Than The Bullies Project. Check it out here and see how you can get involved!)
Have you had to deal with cyberbullying? I’d love to know how you handled it. Be sure to comment below!
Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:
Name:
Email:
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. She is now enrolling for The Big Beautiful Goddess Academy. Click here for details!
(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)
And just in case you want a little inspiration for your facebook wall or office wall:
Is Trolling Really Just Bullying? (Plus 3 Tips For Dealing With Cyberbullying) originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 8, 2012.
October 1, 2012
How To Stop Avoiding Food Shopping
Original image by zurijeta / 123RF Stock Photo. Edited by Golda Poretsky.
Tell me if you relate to this.You’re at home, and you’re hungry. You look in the fridge and there’s not much there — maybe there’s some old takeout containers of dubious age, some fruit that looks like it’s seen better days. Maybe you have the ingredients to make something but it feels too time consuming or just not appealing. Maybe your cabinets are pretty empty too.
So you take care of yourself in the moment and order takeout or drive through or whatever.
I’m not bringing this up to judge you or make you feel bad for your choices. I think everyone does the best they can with the time, money and options that they feel they have.
But I do think that avoiding food shopping, or at least avoiding buying food that’s going to be in your home for at least a few days, is often symptom of dieting, even if you haven’t dieted in years.
Why You Might Be Avoiding Food Shopping
If you’ve ever been on a diet, you know that diets require you to follow a lot of rules. Even if a diet only has one rule like, “don’t eat sugar”, you are going to spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about whether each thing you eat contains sugar, how you can make or find sugar-free alternatives, whether certain sugar-free alternatives are okay and others are not, whether that party that you’re going to later in the month will have things you can eat, and on and on and on.
Often, at the beginning of a diet you purge certain “offending” foods from your home. You toss them or donate them, saying to yourself, “I’ll never eat THAT HORRIBLE, FATTENING THING again!”
You may have found yourself feeling, “good” or “pure” or “moral” for getting rid of those foods. Even if you’re not someone who would normally attribute those words to yourself or anyone else, dieting can induce that kind of thinking.
And by the way, the same things can happen when you apply any sorts of food rules, even if your array of food rules are not called a diet. Detoxes, cleanses, and the like tend to induce the same kinds of thoughts and behaviors.
So what happens days or weeks or months or years later when you’re off the diet? Maybe you’re on a new diet with different rules. Maybe you’ve embraced Health At Every Size® and you just want to listen to your body and let go of diet thinking once and for all.
Unfortunately, those diet rules from 10 weeks or 10 months or 10 years ago are still deeply embedded in your psyche. And so you end up feeling guilty about eating. Even if you have every intent of letting go and leaving those diet rules in the dust, they’re still there, lingering, and making it hard to do things like shop for food.
Click to tweet:
“Avoiding food shopping is often a symptom of a history of dieting.”
When you’re walking down the aisle with your cart or basket, all of those old food rules run through your mind:
“Oh, I can’t buy that. That’s too many calories.”
“I can’t trust myself to buy this. I’ll eat the whole thing in one sitting.”
“I can’t buy this because it’s not organic.”*
Not only do you have these lingering food rules, but, if you’re fat, you may be dealing with people who stare at you or what’s in your cart. This is completely f-ed up and not fair, so I’m going to address that as well.
All of this can lead you to a shopping cart filled with toilet paper and not much else. So I want to share with you three of my top tips for ending food shopping avoidance.
How To Actually Enjoy Food Shopping Again
1) Give Yourself Permission — An important first step in letting go of the diet mentality is to really give yourself permission to eat, buy and make what you want. Buy foods or ingredients for things that you really like. Some of these things may be “fattening” or “caloric” or whatever but giving yourself full permission to eat them will actually begin to even out your eating. Take a little time to ask yourself what you really want and you may find that you’re craving more of a variety of things than you had previously realized. Plus, food shopping will be much, much easier.
2) Do A Little Planning — Getting back into the swing with food shopping can sometimes take a little planning, so make a list of what of you want to get. Start easy — if you haven’t been cooking much lately, try to pick simple, easy to make foods. Include some prepared foods too. And consider starting small, planning for just a few days, or thinking practically about which days you might want to make something at home versus which days you’re going to go out or get takeout or whatever.
3) Have Snappy Answers Available For Judgmental People (Including Your Internal Judge) — Food shopping while fat is often a special kind of torture that thinner folks cannot relate to. It’s easy to feel as if you’re under surveillance and constantly scrutinized for the contents of your cart. Plus, even if no one is looking at you or actively judging you, you have your inner judge telling you that all of your food choices are wrong and bad.
So it’s important to remind yourself that you are a human and therefore need and deserve to eat. No one has the right to tell you what you should be eating nor the right to judge your choices. It’s important to connect with that feeling when you’re food shopping
As one person in my my facebook group shared, “If anyone asks me about my food, I tell them I’m having a party. It may be a party for one, but it’s a party nonetheless.” I think that’s also a great way to think about it. Imagine if you thought about preparing food as a party, a little celebration of you and your loved ones. How amazing might that feel?
Do you struggle with avoiding food shopping? I would love to hear your experience in the comments below.
Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:
Name:
Email:
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. She is now enrolling for The Big Beautiful Goddess Academy. Click here for details!
(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)
*I really understand wanting to buy organic fruits and vegetables and humanely treated animal products. But sometimes, when you’re on a budget, doing that keeps you from buying food. Consider checking out this chart of when to try to buy organic (and when you can skip it) here.
How To Stop Avoiding Food Shopping originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 1, 2012.
September 24, 2012
In Case You Missed It: My Top Ten Takeaways From the HAES® Master Class
Last week, 15 amazing speakers joined me for the Health At Every Size® (HAES®) Master Class.
We talked about everything from the connections between HAES® and yoga, to HAES® as a social justice practice, to the ways that HAES® can help people heal from eating disorders.
So much great stuff came out of this two day event that I just had to share with you my top 10 highlights from these calls. Of course, this is not a comprehensive list. It’s just the tip of the iceberg of pure awesomeness that was the HAES® Master Class. :)
My Top 10 Takeaways From The HAES® Master Class
It’s Okay To Eat What Looks Like An Unbalanced Diet When Transitioning From Dieting
“You might go through food phases, and that’s okay. You may be really into something for like a month and then go off of it and onto something else and that’s fine. Eating an unbalanced diet or what looks like an unbalanced diet can actually work out just fine. In the long run, the mix of the foods you eat is more important than what you eat today.”
– Michelle Allison, Getting Good At Eating
Yoga and HAES® Philosophies Are Connected
“Yoga has a very prominent piece of philosophy within it that is called ahimsa. . . Ahimsa means non-violence, or non-killing or non-harming. . . Ahimsa also means acting with kindness towards ourselves. . . And I see this as a huge correlation with HAES® as well. I really feel that the diet culture that is out there and the weight loss culture that is out there can be extremely harmful as I’m sure most of us who have experienced it know. . . . Whereas HAES® is much more in line with yoga philosophy in terms of being about not harming. Let’s do everything we can to create a healthy body in a gentle and tender and loving and compassionate way.”
– Tiina Veer, HAES® Meets Ahimsa: Applying Yoga Philosophy To Your HAES® Practice And Vice Versa
Research Shows That The Pursuit Of Weight Loss Is Physically And Emotionally Harmful
“What we found is that you don’t need to lose weight to get healthier. We also have a lot of research that shows that the pursuit of weight loss just is harmful. What we see is that it starts people up with this preoccupation with food and weight (this preoccupation could get serious and turn into clinical eating disorders) that people feel like they’re failures, they blame themselves for not being able to get the weight loss that they want, it affects their self esteem, it results in discrimination and stigmatization, we also see that a lot of people end up weight cycling and that there’s a lot of health damage that happens from it, and it distracts people from doing what’s really important.”
– Linda Bacon, The Gift of Food and Weight Preoccupation
What We Know About Fat & Health Is More Rhetoric Than Research
“We have to be aware of the way persuasion is being used to frame our views on fat. . . Making fat about health was an absolutely brilliant rhetorical move. . . Calling obesity a disease, calling fat a disease, made a huge difference in the way people looked at things. It makes it abnormal. It says it must be fixed. It says that we must lose weight at all costs because disease equals death in our minds.”
– Lonie McMichael, Fat Chat: Why The Way We Talk About Fat And Health Matters
How To Respond To The “Fatness Is A Tax & Healthcare Burden” Meme
“Our taxes pay for lots of things that we don’t agree with, and that’s how it goes. . . People cost all kinds of money to society for all kinds of reasons. And people . . . are allowed to do things that don’t prioritize their health, which is why people get to take vacations where they jump out of helicopters wearing skis. . . In our society if you’re thin, typically you can be completely sedentary and eat only fast food and nobody is concerned about you or your cost on society.”
– Ragen Chastain, But But But … Answering HAES® Critics And Questions
Stigmatization Of Fatness Is Dangerous To Our Health
“[Research shows that] stigma causes all sorts of problems with health. It increases systemic inflammation . . . and this has been strongly associated with hypertension, heart disease, type II diabetes, hypercholesterolemia — all the things that we normally associate with obesity are caused by stress which can be caused by stigma.”
– Angela Meadows, Omgdeathfat!!! Or Not. Debunking Obesity “Science” And What Everyone Knows About Weight And Health
Never Say Never When You’re Dealing With Food Sensitivities
“You can honor the reality that certain foods may cause a response in your body that is less than desirable, but to say you should never ever eat that food is completely unrealistic and totally life limiting. . . There will be times that having a specific food will be worth the physical consequences.”
– Amy McIntosh, How HAES® Can Help You Live with Food Sensitivities
Healing From An Eating Disorder Is Not About Stopping A Behavior
“The biggest and most harmful myth about disordered eating is that it’s about food. ‘Just go on a diet, just eat right, just exercise, just stop overeating, just lose weight, just stop throwing up.’ Just stop this or do that is the type of advice that you may have been given . . . So to really heal from disordered eating is to realize that it isn’t about food.”
– Anne Cuthbert, Debunking The Myths About Practicing HAES® When You Have An Eating Disorder
To Increase Mobility, Lessen Frailty Rather Than Fat
“Frailty, which is the reason that mobility issues occur, is the fact that your muscles can no longer carry the weight of your body, and that’s true whether you’re 95 years old and weigh 80 pounds and have muscle atrophy, or it’s true if you weigh 400 pounds and can’t lift your 400 pound body. . . But you would never tell the 80 pound person to lose weight . . . What you would do is give them exercise and help them develop muscles that would carry their weight better. And what a lot of people don’t realize is that that’s the better treatment for mobility issues even when you’re talking about very large people.”
– Pattie Thomas, Practicing HAES® When You’re Living With Disabilities
HAES® Can Have Major Community And Societal Impact
“[Research shows that] if you are treated as a second-class citizen in society your health will suffer for it. . . Being a full social participant [in society] is essential for equal health. . . If we limit Health At Every Size® to just changing health behaviors, I think we do it a great disservice, because I think HAES® activism extends far beyond that. . . With HAES®, because we can bring in social determinants of health, we can encourage people to think critically about our understandings of health.”
– Lucy Aphramor, From Healthcare To Social Justice
By the way, if you’re reading this now and wish you could have been there, it’s not too late!
Click Here To Get All Of The Recordings!
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.
(Listen to this post here, or subscribe on itunes.)
In Case You Missed It: My Top Ten Takeaways From the HAES® Master Class originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on September 24, 2012.
September 17, 2012
Why You Need Be At The HAES® Master Class (It Starts This Thursday!)
I’ve been seriously crazed this week in preparing for the HAES® Master Class and Rosh Hashanah, so I’ve decided to share with you 8 reasons why you seriously need to be at the HAES® Master Class, which starts this Thursday!
8 Reasons To Join Us At The HAES® Master Class
Your Favorite Authors and Bloggers Will Be There — Where else do you get to hear Linda Bacon, Ragen Chastain, The Fat Nutritionist, Marilyn Wann and 12 other truly wonderful speakers all in one place?
Topics That Matter To You — Want to know more about the science of Health At Every Size®? We’ve got you covered. Have food sensitivities and not sure if HAES® is right for you? We’re talking about it. Want to be more fit but feel uncomfortable at the gym? It’s on the agenda. We’ve got so many great topics that more than a few will likely apply to you.
You Don’t Need To Be There Live — I know that for many of you, listening live to an entire 2-day conference online isn’t possible. That’s why downloadable recordings of every single call are included with your ticket. Even if you can’t make it live to any of the calls, purchasing a ticket will ensure that you don’t have to miss out.
Know What To Say To The Haters — Ever have someone look at you like you had 3 heads because you told them you don’t diet? We have a talk that will give you the tools to respond to critics with ease.
Special Bonuses You Won’t Get Elsewhere — As the organizer of this event, I’m privy to some of the wonderful bonuses that speakers have prepared just for this event. You won’t find them any where else!
Get Your Questions Answered — Most of our speakers are including a question and answer session in their talks. This is your chance to ask them your questions!
A Sense Of Community — Practicing HAES® can often be sort of lonely. This class will remind you that you are part of a growing and vibrant community.
I’m Your Host! — If you like my style (and my moves) you’ll like joining me for the HAES® Master Class. Plus, I’m one of the speakers!
Click Here To Get All The Info + Buy Your Ticket!
Why You Need Be At The HAES® Master Class (It Starts This Thursday!) originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on September 17, 2012.
September 9, 2012
Is Worrying About Your Weight Thwarting Your Happiness?
[[This is just the beginning of this post. Visit Body Love Wellness to read the full story and more!]]
September 4, 2012
Announcing The HAES® Master Class– 16 Speakers, 2 Days, All Online!
[[This is just the beginning of this post. Visit Body Love Wellness to read the full story and more!]]
