Golda Poretsky's Blog, page 5

Support Body Love Wellness Just By Shopping At Amazon!

Hi there!

Did you know that you can support Body Love Wellness just by shopping at Amazon.com?

When you shop by clicking an Amazon link on our site, we receive 4-6% of the purchase price of your order, at no cost to you!

We can then use that cash to buy better podcasting and video equipment, programs that make our site sing, and so much more.

Here’s how!

Just CLICK THIS LINK (http://tinyurl.com/BLWAmazon). Then shop all you want. That’s it!

Easy peasy!  And again, there is no additional cost to you to do this, but you get to support Body Love Wellness with your purchases.

Thanks for checking this out.  Happy shopping and thanks in advance!

xo,

Support Body Love Wellness Just By Shopping At Amazon! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on December 15, 2013.

Ladies, Apparently You Need A Bra That Tells You You’re Overeating

Hey! Have you heard about that new “smart bra” that Microsoft is developing?

The bra contains removable sensors that measure heart and skin activity and can let you know when your stress levels are increasing.

Okay. I’m game. I guess that could be helpful in some situations. Maybe it could help you note how stressed you are overall, or help you notice what seems to trigger a stress response. Is that, perhaps, why this bra is being developed?

Uh, well, no. According to their research paper, the bra is being developed as a “just-in-time intervention to support behavioral modification in emotional eating.” According to the study, emotional eaters need help because of “the combination of lifestyle, hedonic, emotional, or habitual over-eating that leads to obesity.”

Now I get it. I need sensors in my bra BECAUSE OBESITY. (Even though the reality is that “obese” people eat no more than thinner people, but why let reality get in the way of fixating on fauxbesity?)

Does This Bra Make My Boobs Look Sexist?

I honestly think this is could be a great piece of technology. But, since it’s designed to help women monitor their stress levels, OF COURSE, the focus has to be on food and weight.

Just the idea that women need a bra like this fosters the typical, diet-industry view of women. We all know the typical diet-industry female archetype who is desperate to lose weight, desperate to control her eating, unaware of her own needs and emotions, fearful that she has no willpower, and, somehow, always close enough to a refrigerator that may tempt her to fall into a bingey abyss.

So, of course, she needs sensors in her bra to let her know when she’s stressed and remind her not to go to the fridge. Because women are just mindless grazers who need to have their emotions “brasplained” to them? Or because shame works so well? Or because telling someone not to do something all day long makes them want to do it . . . less? None of this makes sense to me.

(Also, just as a sidenote, I think most women would take off their bra if they wanted to comfortably binge at home. But hey, they can’t think of everything.)

Reinforcing The Disconnect

I acknowledge that women often feel disconnected from their bodies. In many ways, the weight-loss industry creates and reinforces this disconnect by telling women to actively ignore their bodies’ signals (e.g. hunger cues and responses to exercise) and focus on weight loss goals that have nothing to do with the reality of their actual bodies.

In my coaching practice, I help women pay attention to their bodies again. And it’s often much easier for them than they expect. It just takes a little time, and practice, and a willingness to trust their bodies.

Do we really need our bras to tell us when we’re stressed out? And furthermore, is the answer always not to eat?

Stick a fork in my electronics-laden bra. I’m done.

What do you think of this bra? Let me know in the comments section below!

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

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Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

Ladies, Apparently You Need A Bra That Tells You You’re Overeating originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on December 10, 2013.

The Non-Dieter’s Holiday Survival Guide (Redux!)

(If this post sounds familiar, it is! I’m bringing back a slightly modified post from last year.)

It seems that every year around this time, I get gazillions of emails from folks who are nervous about the holidays.

Explaining to your family that you don’t want to know the number of calories in pecan pie, that you’re not interested in that new diet book that worked for your nephew’s former roommate, and that, yes, you have put on a little weight, and it’s totally OKAY, may not be your idea of a fun holiday.

The Non-Dieter’s
Holiday Survival Guide
(click each tip for more details)


Breathe, Deeply & Often
Set Boundaries
Enjoy Your Food
Follow The Fun
It’s Not You

By the way, I’m offering some extra support this year with a great e-course. Click here to check it out!

I’m a veteran of those aerobics classes where the teacher constantly tells you, “Don’t forget to breathe!” I remember finding that advice kind of annoying and yet strangely helpful when a deep breath was really what I needed.

How It Works: As you probably know, taking a breath that’s a little deeper than normal is an important way to reduce anxiety and relax your body. It also helps you to enjoy your food.

Pro Tip: Instead of taking a really deep, 100% full type of breath (which can actually be a little stressful to your body if you’re not used to it), take a 75% full breath. Just try to fill up your lungs about three-quarters of the way, hold it for a few seconds, and breathe out. Do this whenever you think of it, and especially if you’re feeling anxious. This will relax your body and allow you to engage with the 4 other tips.

This one is so important but often so hard to do. For a more in depth post on how to set boundaries, check this out, but I want to give you my handy formula for setting boundaries right here:

1) Acknowledge The Other Person, Their Feelings & Positive Motives

2) Make Your Request Clearly

How It Works: Let’s say you have an aunt who always comments on your weight, and you’d really like her to stop. Here’s how you can use this formula to set a boundary:

“Aunt Ethel, I know you comment on my weight because you think it’s helpful, but it’s not, and I need you to stop doing that.”

Pro Tip: You may need to repeat yourself a lot when setting this boundary, and it’s possible that Aunt Ethel is never going to get it. However, by setting the boundary, you get the benefit of standing up for yourself and acknowledging what you need, which is quite empowering.

Click to tweet this: “Get the Non-Dieter’s Holiday Survival Guide from @bodylovewellnes!”

Enjoying food can actually be quite difficult during the holidays, even if you love holiday food. If you’re feeling stressed and anxious, it’s likely that your body is in fight or flight mode. This means that the blood is in your arms and legs, rather than the core of your body where you need it to digest and assimilate your food.

How It Works: So it’s especially important during this time of year to focus, as best you can, on actually enjoying your food. As much as possible, take time to breathe, go a little slower, and engage all of your senses. One of the nicest things about this time of year is the special food that we don’t normally eat, so take time to really enjoy it.

Pro Tip: If you start to feel your inner critic going on and on about how you shouldn’t be eating this or that, take a moment to think, “I approve of my food choices.” Use this as an affirmation that will calm your mind and allow it to get on board with the fact that you are enjoying your food.

Sometimes the holidays can feel really demanding. You may have endless shopping lists, way too much food to prepare, or social situations that require seeing people you usually avoid. So I think it’s important to find the fun where you can.

How It Works: Finding the fun in not so fun situations is an art and it takes practice, but if you look for it, you can catch it and amplify it. Turn on some music and make cooking into a dance party. Tell jokes, laugh, move your body whenever possible. The moment you start feeling stuck is the moment it’s time to change things up and follow the fun.

Pro Tip: Ever been to a party or get-together where it seems like the most fun is happening in the kitchen? Sometimes volunteering to help (or asking others to help you) is actually the most fun. If you can make neatening up, doing the dishes, cooking etc. more of a group activity, it can change the energy of it, make it feel less overwhelming, and give you something to talk about other than so-and-so’s latest diet.

Being around people you love who diet can make you feel positively nuts, so it’s important to remind yourself that choosing not to diet is actually a sound choice.

How It Works: It’s hard enough to operate in a world where facts about fat and health and the reality of diet marketing is an unfamiliar subject. So it’s important to have some backup. Call a non-dieting friend when you get a moment alone. Look at body positive pinterest boards. Bring my book with you so you can remind yourself that going to your Mom’s OA meeting over the weekend is not the answer.

Pro Tip: You don’t have to convince anyone that you’re right. Doing so will just leave you frustrated.

Need more support this holiday?

Check out the HAES® For The Holidays E-course here.

We’re starting in just 2 days!

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight.

The Non-Dieter’s Holiday Survival Guide (Redux!) originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on November 25, 2013.

New E-Course: HAES® For The Holidays!

Did you ever notice that the holidays can bring up a lot of . . . stuff?

Being with family can mean being scrutinized about your weight, your food choices, and even bigger life choices.

Whether you come from a family of constant dieters or one where cleaning your plate is the best way to show love, navigating your way through the holiday season can feel more pressured and stressful than anything else.

Wouldn’t it be fabulous to have more fun this holiday? Wouldn’t it be lovely to have the tools you need so that you can have a really joyous holiday season?

If so, I think you should check out my new, super-affordable e-course, HAES® For The Holidays! I’ve specifically designed an e-course to give you the body positive, loving support you deserve. All of the content is designed to align with Health At Every Size® (HAES®) practices.

We get started next week, so don’t delay!

For full details, click here!

Happy HAES® Holidays!

New E-Course: HAES® For The Holidays! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on November 19, 2013.

Get Your Shadows On A Tightrope Blog Carnival Links Here!

In honor of the 30th anniversary of the groundbreaking book, Shadows On A Tightrope, some of the biggest names in fat positivity are writing blog posts about their experiences with the book.

Rather than write my own, I’ve decided to be a hub for these posts. I’ll be updating throughout the day, so check back here to join the carnival! By the way, these are in no particular order!

“Out Of The Shadows” by Ragen Chastain
“Changing How You Think About Your Body for Good” by Kimberly Dark
“Parallel Lives” by Lara Frater
“Shadow on a Tightrope: the book that made me fat” by Charlotte Cooper
“Up Hill Both Ways: 30th Anniversary of Shadow on a Tightrope” by Jeanette DePatie
“The Vision Has Never Changed” by Rochelle Rice
“Shadow On A Tightrope Turns 30” by Peggy Elam
“Fat People Of The World, Unite!” by Jassie Stokes
“Nothing About Us Without Us” by Pattie Thomas
“Shadow on a Tightrope” by April Lashbrook

More to come! Check back here throughout the day!

Get Your Shadows On A Tightrope Blog Carnival Links Here! originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on November 8, 2013.

Ask Golda! One Important Key To Healthy Eating That People Usually Forget

When you stop restricting and start letting go of food rules, it can be hard to navigate how to eat healthfully.

I have lots of things to say about this, but I wanted to share with you a really important key to healthy eating that most people forget. Check it out in this week’s edition of Ask Golda!

For more support with this topic, check out my home study course, How To Heal From Emotional Eating here.

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

Ask Golda! One Important Key To Healthy Eating That People Usually Forget originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on November 4, 2013.

5 “Diet Rules” That I Break All The Time

It’s been nearly 6 years since I stopped dieting.

Prior to that, I had dieted on and off (mostly on) for 24 years. I did everything from Atkins to Weight Watchers to Overeaters’ Anonymous to doctor-prescribed low calorie diets and everything in between.

So it was challenging to imagine not dieting and to figure out how to eat without lots of rules.

When I really think about it, I just have a few rules now. And they’re not even really rules, more like guidelines or things to consider. My only rules are that I like to try to get a good amount of fruits and vegetables every day, and I try to avoid aspartame, sucralose/splenda, high fructose corn syrup (but, see below) and hydrogenated oils. That’s really it.

My only other rules are that I like to eat what actually tastes good to me and that I try to respect when my body feels full. These last two happen naturally at this point so I don’t actually have to think about them or really require them as rules.

People often ask me what I eat, and I try to steer them away from it because I don’t think what I eat is all that important. I’m not a diet guru and I will never say, “Eat like me and your problems will be solved!”

But I was thinking today that I do break my old diet rules all the time without even thinking about it. (And, after the typical diet regain happened, it hasn’t affected my weight, nor, more importantly, health indicators like cholesterol and triglycerides.) I even break “intuitive eating rules” all the time without any deleterious effects. So I wanted to share some of these with you so that you can see that breaking these rules is no big deal!

1. I Eat Full Fat Everything

After a lifetime of coffee with skim milk and low-fat grilled cheese sandwiches, it was a revelation to finally eat full fat food!

My first experience of it was while I was on the Atkins diet, but it was less sanctioned by my later diets, like Weight Watchers.

At first I would feel a little guilty about it, but then I realized that the whole low fat/ no fat thing is really just a scam that preys on people’s faulty knowledge of biology; i.e., the idea that when you eat fat it becomes fat on your body.

Full fat foods are amazing. Fat in food is the stuff that keeps you feeling satisfied. Your brain needs fat. You need fat! And it’s freaking delicious. Not only that, full fat food is often less chemicalized, because it doesn’t need the fillers and binders that low fat foods need in order to be edible.

I put heavy cream in my coffee, I eat full fat Greek yogurt. My eggs ALWAYS include the yolks. And I will never go back.

2. I Eat In Front Of The TV

One of my specialties is helping folks move from diet-based eating to intuitive eating. One of the biggest no-no’s in the intuitive eating world is eating in front of the TV. And yet, I do it all the time.

Why do I do it? Because I like to do it. I find it relaxing. I’ve noticed that watching the news or political shows while eating stresses me out, so I don’t do it. But I’m happy to watch my favorite comedy shows while eating.

I’ve found that I can eat and watch TV without eating past the point of comfort. I’m able to be aware of my body and my fullness levels while still watching TV.

When clients come to me beating themselves up about eating in front of the TV, they’re usually relieved to hear that I do that myself! Also, I’ve found that when you stop beating yourself up for doing it, you can actually notice whether you enjoy it or not, and notice your body’s signals while watching.

3. Sometimes I Eat In My Car

This is another HUGE no-no in the intuitive eating community, but I do it sometimes.

Every once in a while I have a meeting or appointment to get to and I realize that I don’t have much time to eat.

I’ve found that if I get a croissant from the bakery and eat that in the car on the way somewhere, it’s not too messy (just brush-off-able crumbs) and it can satisfy me for a few hours. (I have no doubt that the butter (See #1) is what’s really keeping me satisfied.)

Of course, eating in the car is not ideal. I’m not really paying attention. I’m just eating something so that I don’t feel too hungry later. And in that way, my Car Croissant(TM) is, to me, self care. I’m recognizing that I’m hungry and need to eat something and not making a big deal about. It satisfies me so that I can think about other things.

4. When I Actually Have Soda, It’s Regular Soda

After years of drinking liters upon liters of diet soda, I stopped drinking soda altogether about 12 years ago.

It was really hard to kick the habit, but the result was wonderful. I realized that the aspartame in soda really doesn’t work for me. After a month of not drinking diet soda, my brain felt clearer. I actually felt like my memory improved significantly and I felt better physically.

Nowadays I don’t drink much soda, but when I do, I have just regular old soda.

Sometimes I’ll get one of those fancy cane sugar ones, but mostly I’ll just get a coke or a ginger ale or whatever.

I know that I said that one of my remaining guidelines was avoiding high fructose corn syrup, and that is true. But every once in a while I have something with it and move on with my life. I don’t worry about it or beat myself up for it. I just enjoy the taste of whatever it is, satisfy that craving, and then think about other things.

5. One Last Diet Rule That I Break Every Time I Eat

In reality, I break a gazillion old diet rules every time I eat. I used to have so many that it was impossible to eat anything without breaking some sort of rule.

But the big rule that I break all the time, every time I eat, is that I eat whatever I eat without feeling guilty.

In fact, I never feel guilty about food anymore. I just eat. And then I stop. And later I eat again.

I don’t suffer the endless existential crisis of “Should I eat this? Is this okay on my diet? How many calories have I eaten today? I want this but I shouldn’t eat this!!!”

I’ve had six guilt-free years of enjoying food and not thinking about it very much and I will never go back to my old diet rules.

What are your old diet rules that you break all the time? Are you thinking about getting off diets but don’t quite know how? I hope you’ll comment below!

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

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Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

5 “Diet Rules” That I Break All The Time originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 22, 2013.

Dear Michelle Obama — Please Don’t Appear On The Biggest Loser Again

Jillian Michaels yelling at a TBL contestant

The word on the street is that First Lady Michelle Obama will be appearing yet again on the yelling at fat people show The Biggest Loser this November.

Ostensibly, she’s going on the show to remind people to drink more water. Fine. Whatever. But the effect of this choice is to give her stamp of approval to a show that abuses and demeans people for entertainment.

A large group of mental health professionals, eating disorder specialists and activists (including me) have teamed up to ask Ms. Obama to not appear on The Biggest Loser, and we’d like you to be part of this effort!

Here’s what you can do:

Sign This Petition
Pin And Share These Memes

Tweet To Ms. Obama ↓

Click here to tweet: “@FLOTUS please do not promote #stigma & dangerous weight loss methods by appearing on @biggestlosernbc.”

(This tweet includes a link to my interview with a Biggest Loser finalist, which you can choose to include in your tweet or not.)

For more information, check out some of my articles on the problems with the Biggest Loser:


Interview with Kai Hibbard, Season 3 Finalist. Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
My #stopbiggestloser article on the problems with including children in the show is here.

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

Dear Michelle Obama — Please Don’t Appear On The Biggest Loser Again originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 17, 2013.

Dealing With Unintentional Weight Loss In A Body Loving Way

So you’ve adopted Health At Every Size and/or body acceptance. You’re feeling good about your body. You’re more comfortable in your skin.

You don’t mind having your picture taken anymore. You’re experimenting with clothes and no longer feel you have to wear only black.

You no longer see food as good or bad. You no longer hate yourself for eating a cupcake or feel virtuous for eating celery.

And then, out of nowhere, your pants feel a little loose. Your bra could use some extra hooks to make it tighter. Your leggings don’t feel so clingy anymore. Read my big caveat here.

Losing this weight can feel very weird because your only context for weight loss is from your dieting/ disordered eating past. Losing weight reminds you of those days of calorie counting, over-exercising, stressing out about your weight.

Unexpected weight loss can trigger you into old, diety thinking. You might start thinking, “If I’m losing weight without restricting, what might happen if I just cut out dessert?! I might really start losing weight then!” or “If I just exercised a little more I could get skinny!”

Thinking this way can feel really scary and dangerous. After all the work you’ve done to heal your relationship with food and your body, these old thoughts can feel like a big setback and a sign that you’re sliding into your old food-obsessed, body-hating ways.

But it doesn’t have to mean any of that. So here are a few tips for dealing with unintentional weight loss.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up For Being Triggered

I often say that the first rule of The Body Love Club is to not beat yourself up for anything. (It’s like the exact opposite of Fight Club.)

So you lost a few pounds and you got triggered. You started thinking about inducing more weight loss, how skinny you could get, etc.

Given that you probably thought that way for decades in the past, is it any wonder that you might feel those feelings again?

The unfortunate fact is that in our society, being thinner comes with lots of perks (or privilege). You experience less stigma, it’s easier to find clothes, people give you more compliments and on and on. It’s hard to not feel like you want more and more of that. Even if you now love your bigger body, it’s hard to let go of the desire for more and more of the societal benefits of being thinner.

So if you start to notice these feelings, just allow yourself to feel them. You don’t have to act on them. You don’t have to stop them. Just notice that they’re there, and give yourself a break.

Triggers Are Part Of (Not A Deviation From) Your Body Love Journey

I think we often want our journeys to be clear and linear, but they rarely are.

I have yet to meet a client who went straight from the Point A of body hatred to the Point B of body love without wandering off the path at least once.

Feeling triggered and having setbacks are actually part of this process. For those of you who like visuals, rather than imagining a straight path, imagine a wheel rolling down a path. If you’re at one spot on the wheel, there will be times when you feel like you’re making great leaps forward, and other times when you feel like you’re going backward, even though you’re still rolling down the path.

Click to tweet: “Feeling triggered and having setbacks are a normal part of your body acceptance journey.”

These moments when you feel like you’re going backward are actually wonderful. They’re reminders of how far you’ve come (remember when you used to have these obsessive thoughts without any context for another way of thinking?) and reminders that you may have some more challenges to work through (how can you work to love your body right now)?

Whatever you do, don’t stress yourself out about slipping into old habits. You are in a new place now. You can experience these feelings without diving back into old habits. You already broke up with dieting and disordered eating. You just have to remind yourself of why.

Go Back To Your Body Loving Techniques

Last but not least, it’s time to dive back into body loving techniques that served you in the first place.

Think back to the tools you used in the past that had helped you become more body accepting. (For some ideas, click here.) Did you say positive things in the mirror, look at body positive blogs, tell your inner critic to shut the hell up?

Go back to the tools you used that had a big impact and use them again. As much as you can, wear clothes that fit and that you feel good in. Use affirmations like, “I love my body at any size!” when you start to feel like you’re fixating on weight loss.

And don’t forget to sign up for my mailing list (below) for more body love tips!

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

CAVEAT: Health At Every Size, body acceptance, and intuitive eating affect different people in different ways, and weight loss should never be the goal (for a gazillion reasons). Please don’t think you’re “doing it wrong” if you don’t lose weight. This article is just meant to help you handle weight loss (if you’re experiencing it) in a less triggering way. Click here to read the rest of the article.

Dealing With Unintentional Weight Loss In A Body Loving Way originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 16, 2013.

Ask Golda! How To Find The Beauty In Fat

Do you find it hard to find the beauty in fat (your own or someone else’s). Watch this video for some help on letting go of internalized negative beliefs about fat! You can use the techniques I mention to start finding fat (and your own body in general) more appealing.

For more support with this topic, check out my Body Love 101 page.

Get great body love tips and more when you subscribe:

Name:

Email:

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

Ask Golda! How To Find The Beauty In Fat originally appeared on Body Love Wellness (http://www.bodylovewellness.com) on October 2, 2013.