Maya Hu-Chan's Blog, page 12

The Surprising Ways Gender Bias Holds Women Back

In several recent columns, I have explored what it means for women today to “have it all,” and how it involves balancing the four pillars that make up our lives.

We’ve explored the pillars of self, family, and community. In this column, I’d like to discuss the final pillar: work.

For many women, work satisfaction is crucial to feeling fulfilled. We need to feel like we are challenged, successful, and growing in our careers. But there are many factors that often hold us back.

Gender bias

Much has been written about gender bias toward women in the workplace. In her books “Fresh Insights to END the Glass Ceiling” and “Women Are Creating the Glass Ceiling and Have the Power to End It,” author Nancy Parsons clearly explains the unique challenges that women face, particularly as they seek to move into senior roles. These challenges can be summarized in one sentence: “Perceptions, biases, and stereotypes hold women back while perceptions, biases, and stereotypes catapult men forward.”

In her books, Parsons explores the research that identifies the risk factors that typically show up under stress or when facing adversity or conflict. For young women and female middle managers, the top risk factor is being perceived as a Worrier, someone who is unwilling to make decisions due to fear or criticism. Worriers are thought of as self-doubting, indecisive, and prone to over-analyzing.

Men, on the other hand, when displaying the same “worrier”-style traits, are often perceived as thoughtful, careful, and deliberate decision makers.

Statistically, men’s most common leadership risk factors include being perceived as Egoists, Rule Breakers or Upstagers. But the perceptions of each label again differ for each gender. When a woman is an egoist, she’s considered self-centered. A man who is an egoist is just extremely confident. When a woman is a rulebreaker, she’s thought of as inconsistent. A rule-breaking man, on the other hand, is a change agent. When a woman is perceived as an Upstager, she’s too opinionated. A man, however, is just selling his point of view.

What does this tell us about the challenges women face in fulfilling the “work” pillar of life? It tells us that perception is everything. And that we must learn to manage it.

Managing perceptions

When I work with clients in my executive coaching practice, the first thing I do is help them learn how they are seen by others. People’s perceptions have currency. And they can help or hinder your career.

The story of one of my clients, “Catherine,” is a dramatic example of this. Catherine is a brilliant scientist. She has a PhD from an Ivy League school and has often appeared before Congress to offer expert testimony. However, for several years, she had remained stuck in the same position at her job. In business meetings, her status in the room was often not clear – in fact, she was often asked to bring coffee. After soliciting feedback from peers, one thing became clear: She lacked executive presence.

Peers noted that she was often observed running between meetings, looking rushed and stressed. In meetings, she was quiet and hesitant to insert herself into conversations. When she delivered presentations, they were long-winded, filled with technical jargon and data. Her feedback even included observations about her posture, noting that it was hunched. This all added up to the perception of a lack of confidence and authority.

These were all Catherine’s blind spots. She was not aware that these perceptions about her were so pervasive. And in order to manage our perceptions, we must be aware of our blind spots — and figure out how to change them.

This does not require a complete reengineering of a person’s personality. When working with Catherine, I did not ask her to change who she is. I only asked her to adjust a few of her behaviors.

First, I asked Catherine to schedule meetings for 50 minutes, allowing her an extra ten minutes to get to her next meeting without rushing and giving the appearance of someone who isn’t in control.

Second, Catherine worked on her presentation skills and grew her ability to communicate more concisely. Instead of overwhelming listeners with jargon, she learned how to synthesize key points and deliver them confidently.

Third, she made the effort to contribute in conversations. This was a challenge, as it was out of Catherine’s comfort zone. So, we started with small goals — in every meeting, I asked her to speak at least twice, and not just agree, but share specific thoughts and opinions. After some practice, this became easier and easier.

Lastly, I asked Catherine to simply be aware of her posture. If she noticed herself hunching, she should stand up straight.

I worked with Catherine for six months. Within that time, she made those changes. They completely changed her peers’ and upper management’s perception of her. Soon, she was promoted to vice president.

Of the four pillars of life (work, family, self, community), work is one that women tend to pour much of their time and energy into. It is a shame, then, that forces like gender bias can hinder our efforts to “have it all.” But, we are not helpless. We can be aware of the perceptions others have of us, and how they can feed into gender bias. We can be willing to acknowledge our blind spots, and be open to changing them. If we do this, we can counter those forces, and we can be closer to truly “having it all. “

The post The Surprising Ways Gender Bias Holds Women Back appeared first on Global Leadership Associates.

The Healing Power of Friendships

In my recent discussions of what it means to “have it all,” I’ve explored two pillars of life — self and family. Now I’d like to explore a third pillar, one that is often as neglected as self: community.

A landmark 81-year Harvard study sought the answer to the question, “what keeps us happiest as we go through life?” The results boiled down to one core conclusion: Good relationships keep us happy. Later research shows they also keep us healthy, impacting everything from mental sharpness to longevity.

Your community is the sum of these relationships. And while the makeup of your community may change throughout your life, the importance of having a support system stays the same.

But just as the pillar of “self” requires deliberate nurturing and care, we have to put some work and thought into how we cultivate our community.

Deepen existing relationships and build new ones.

Your community is made up of the people who nurture and support you throughout the stages of your life — and who receive the same kind of support from you. It’s easy to set aside these relationships when work and family take up most of our time and energy, but our emotional and physical well-being demand they be made a priority. Double down on your investment in these relationships.

My mother-in-law once shared an insight on friendship that I have never forgotten. When my children were younger, I commented that I thought it was wonderful she was able to frequently socialize with her friends, and that I wished I had time for that too. Her response surprised me. “When my kids were your kids’ age, I also rarely had time for my friends. That’s just different stages in life. But it’s good to always maintain some connection, even minimal, because once the kids grow older, you can reconnect with people and spend more time with them.”

It’s easy to send a text to check in, or a holiday card to remind someone you cherish your friendship. These actions maintain a connection — and make both parties feel supported and cared for.

Sometimes we grow apart from certain friends. Maybe we no longer share the same values, or the relationship is simply no longer rewarding. It’s OK to let those relationships go, but be open to creating new ones to take their place.

Be deliberate about whom you choose to spend your time with.

Author Tim Ferriss once said, “You are the average of the five people you associate with most.” I keep a note on my desk that reminds me of something else: “You become what you focus on and the people you spend time with.” Fill your community with people who are supportive, positive, and lift your mind and spirit, and stay away from toxic people.

What defines a toxic person? It’s someone who is negative, critical, intentionally brings you down, or approaches friendship as a one-sided, all-take, no-give relationship. This is not to say that friends should not challenge you, but toxic people tend to drain you of energy, rather than reenergize you.

Having people around you who admire and respect you, who support and raise you up, and who encourage you to become your best self plays a huge part in your sense of belonging and connectedness, not just with yourself, but with others and within the world you live.

When thinking of your community, ask yourself: Who do I want to spend time with, and what kind of person do I want to become?

Women supporting women.

Sometimes women view other women as competition. This can fuel hostility, and women wind up being ignored, undermined, and, in some cases, even sabotaged by other women. Instead, we should think of ourselves as one large community. The more women help one another, the more we help ourselves. Acting like a coalition truly does produce results.

An excellent example of this is the approach that the women of the Obama White House took to supporting one another. When President Obama took office, women made up only one-third of the staff. They often found themselves talked over, ignored, or interrupted in meetings. In response, the women banded together to adopt a strategy of “amplification”: When a woman voiced an important contribution in a meeting, another woman repeated it, crediting its author. Another woman would then repeat that woman’s statement, and so on and so forth, until the original message was amplified throughout the room. This ensured the women’s contributions weren’t ignored, and that credit was given to the rightful originator.

We all want the same thing: to feel comfortable with our choices and to feel validated by those around us. So let’s start by validating and support one another.

When the demands of work and family overwhelm, it’s easy to think friendships aren’t a priority. In fact, the opposite is true: It’s then that we need support the most. Take time to nurture your friendships, surround yourself with the right people, and support your fellow women. Then, you’ll have community for a lifetime.

The post The Healing Power of Friendships appeared first on Global Leadership Associates.

What Having Triplets Taught Me About Letting Go

In recent columns, I have explored what it means to “have it all,” and how integrating the four domains of life — self, family, community, and work — can bring us closer to feeling fulfilled.

In this column, I’d like to discuss the domain of family, and the effect of our mindsets, attitudes, and expectations of our roles and our partners’ roles at home.

Making peace

I am the mother of triplets. My work has always involved travel, and people often ask, “Who is taking care of your kids? Your husband must be very understanding.” It’s doubtful that a man would be asked the same question and hear, “Your wife must be very understanding.” These kinds of comments may sound harmless, but they reinforce bias about professional women.

And they have another impact: In my case, the comments used to make me feel guilty. When I was working, I’d feel bad that I wasn’t spending time with the kids. When I was with my kids, I’d feel bad about not working. I wasn’t present and enjoying the moment.

I looked to my mentor for advice. He said, “Maya, make the best choice you can and make peace with it. If things don’t work out, you can always make another choice. You always have choices.”

This means: Drop the guilt trip. For women, guilt management can be just as important as time management. We need to treat ourselves kindly and learn to make peace with our choices, realizing it is up to us to decide what is best given our choices in a given moment.

Rethink the drama triangle

The drama triangle, as defined by Dr. Stephen Karpman, describes the unhealthy relationships that develop when we think of ourselves as victims and others as persecutors or rescuers. Persecutors can be anyone — from society as a whole to your spouse — while rescuers are those who come to your aid, like a best friend who tells you it’s all going to be OK. The triangle can create a cycle of dependency, where the rescuer makes a habit of rescuing and the victim is always helpless and hopeless.

When you make peace with your choices and drop the guilt trip, you turn this dynamic around.

Instead of being a victim, you become a creator. You create your own options and your own future. Those in the persecutor roles become challengers, their actions becoming opportunities to think, reflect, and become stronger. Your rescuers become coaches — instead of doing things for you, they empower you to make the right choices.

Empower men at home

When my kids were smaller, I would spend hours before a work trip cooking, so that my family would have ready-made meals while I was away. As my trips became more frequent, it became impractical for me to do this consistently. A friend asked me, “What do you think would happen if you didn’t cook for them? What would your husband do?” I thought, “Well, that’s a good question. I don’t know. I should find out.”

I asked my wonderful husband, Wayne, if he could manage without the pre-made meals, and he assured me he could. So I embarked on a trip without the usual several hours of cooking.

When I called home, my son, Tyler (who was about 7 or 8 at the time), gave me a detailed report. He whispered, “Mama, Baba ordered pizza yesterday. Mama, the house is very messy!” To make matters worse, I received a call from my son’s teacher, who informed me he had been wearing the same T-shirt for five days … a white T-shirt that was quickly becoming a grey T-shirt.

After a difficult conversation with my husband, I thought about my options. I could go back to the old way, cooking all the food myself, or I could consider that maybe I was the problem. I expected my husband to do everything my way. He was trying his best, and I should give him a chance, keep my mouth shut, and see what happens.

Over time, my husband mastered a few quick, easy, and nutritious dishes he rotated throughout the week — even Tyler’s spy reports were more positive.

If we want to do less at home, and for our partners to do more, we have to let go and empower them to do things their own way. A study found that wives who engage in “gatekeeping” behaviors do five more hours of family work per week than wives who take a more collaborative approach. It’s not an equal division of labor if you spend your time and energy directing him on how to do his part.

Men don’t often ponder the issue of “having it all” because they don’t share the same expectations and pressures that women face — they are not asked who is taking care of their children when they travel. But if we make peace with our choices, rethink the drama triangle, drop the guilt trip, and empower our spouses at home, we get closer to the day when self, family, work, and community are integrated — the definition of “having it all.”

The post What Having Triplets Taught Me About Letting Go appeared first on Global Leadership Associates.

Family, Work, Life: Why You Should Come First

In a recent column, I explored what it means to “have it all.” Life presents us with the challenge, and reward, of an always-evolving definition of “having it all” — especially for women.

I also discussed that we feel most satisfied when we are mindful of how we balance and integrate the four domains of life: self, family, community, and work.

I’d like to explore the area that is often the most neglected, yet is the most crucial: self.

Every time you take a flight, you’re reminded of the instructions to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others in the event of an emergency. Why is that? Because if we literally can’t breathe, we are of no use to anyone else.

Women tend to focus on taking care of others — children, spouses, friends, colleagues — while neglecting themselves. But if we are not at our best, we cannot show up for anyone else.

Here are several things you can do to start making your “self” as important as the other parts of your life.

Prioritize your health. Numerous studies show that people who prioritize their health have more energy and better focus. Although we often try to do it all, we can’t: We need proper nutrition, sleep, and exercise, and the time to recover after long stretches of work.

I find that keeping my body moving is an enjoyable — and rewarding — way to prioritize my health, and many successful leaders feel this way, too.

Several years ago, I had the pleasure of working with Frances Hesselbein, former CEO of the Girl Scouts of America and recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom award. Once, I picked her up from the airport and accompanied her as she checked into her hotel. After check-in, she asked the front desk for two cans of soda. When they asked what kind she’d like, she said it didn’t matter — she would not be drinking the soda, she would be using the cans as hand weights to exercise with in her room. Frances found a way to prioritize her health — and keep moving — in a life filled with work and travel.

Manage your energy. In a recent article, McKinsey partner Gila Vadnai-Tolub writes that the term “work-life balance” implies that one area depletes energy while the other restores. She argues we’re better served by learning how to balance our four types of energy: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

Physical energy defines how we feel in our bodies. If you’re ever working for long periods of time and feel the urge to get up and walk around, that’s your body responding to a need for a boost in physical energy. Make room for physical resets in your daily schedule.

Mental energy is the energy we use to focus, analyze and think. We all have mental tasks that energize or drain us. Being mindful and aware of what these are helps us manage mental energy.

We derive emotional energy from connecting with others. Positive interactions can boost our emotional energy, while negative interactions can drain us.

Finally, we derive spiritual energy from doing things that are meaningful to us. When our work is fulfilling on a deep level, we may feel physically and mentally exhausted, but our reserve of spiritual energy is full.

If you are aware of the elements of your life that fill or deplete your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual energy, you can more easily find balance.

Take control of your smartphone. “Mindfulness” is more than a current-day buzzword — it describes the act of being truly in the moment, free of distraction, judgment, and mental noise, and present with the task or person in front of you. Sadly, one of our greatest tools for productivity is also one of the greatest hindrances to mindfulness: the smartphone.

Studies show that the mere presence of a phone between two people affects the quality and content of their conversation. An interaction that could fulfill your spiritual or emotional energy can end up depleting it.

One of my clients realized her smartphone was extending her workday into unreasonable hours, affecting her time with her family — keeping her from feeling like she was “having it all.” In response, she created three smartphone rules for herself.

One, she turns her phone off at 7 PM and on again at 7 AM. This gives her time to unwind in the evening with her family and time to ease into her day without rushing to check emails. Two, she avoids checking or sending emails to her team after hours and on the weekends. Doing so only perpetuates the cycle of frenzy. Three, she turned off notifications for most apps, lessening the noise that can distract her. With these rules, she allows herself to disconnect, and live in the moment and appreciate the people she is with.

“Self-care” is a term we hear often, but it means more than the occasional manicure or massage. When we truly take care of the “self,” we make ourselves as important as the people and the tasks in our lives — and, in turn, we’re able to be better parents, partners, and leaders.

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Want to Have it All? Don’t Forget an Important Part: Yourself

It’s a question women around the world ask themselves every day: Can I have it all?

Let’s cut to the chase: The answer is “yes,” but women must decide what “all” means to them, and acknowledge that the definition will evolve as their lives evolve, too.

Recently, I delivered a keynote address on this topic for the 2019 Women’s Leadership Summit in Shanghai, China, a gathering of women leaders from China, Korea and Japan.

I asked the women in the audience to draw a pie chart composed of the four major domains of life: self, family, community, and work. I asked them to think about how much of their time and energy is currently allocated to each domain, and portray that on the chart.

I was surprised by the results. Many women placed “self” at 5 percent — some at zero. I then asked the women to imagine an ideal future. If you could visualize the life you want, how would the pie chart look?

Even then, many women only increased “self” incrementally, to 10 or 15 percent. Some, however, increased it significantly, completely changing their charts. It was reassuring to observe the women having this realization in real time: My life can be different and it’s up to me.

Over the next few months, I’d like to explore the topic of “having it all.” I’ll discuss the four major domains of life, how they change throughout our careers and life, and the process of integrating them. I’ll do this through the lens of my own experiences and the experiences of the extraordinary women I have coached throughout my career as an executive coach.

One of these women is Dr. Darlene Solomon.

Darlene has been the CTO of Agilent Technologies since 2006. I was her executive coach 15 years ago and have known her through all stages of her career: scientist; the only female lab director in her company; vice president of R&D; and, today, chief technology officer. Every step of the way, Darlene was able to adapt and integrate her work, family, self and community into her whole life.

I recently asked Darlene if she thought women could have it all. “Yes,” she responded. “We can have it all. But you have to decide what ‘all’ means to you.”

What defines “all” for a single woman at the start of her career is not the same as a woman in middle management with children in school, or an empty nester in the C-suite.

Darlene also shared what she believes can help women integrate the four domains of their life, based on her own experiences.

Prioritize. This helps keep what is truly important in perspective.

“When I came back to work after six weeks maternity leave with my second child, I realized I have to prioritize,” Darlene said.

Compartmentalize your life. Make sure you are single minded on whatever it is you are working on.

“When I am at work, focus on work. When I am at home, focus on the kids. I have to find ways to make the most of each piece of my life,” she said. “Don’t make them compete with each other.”

Take care of yourself. You deserve more than 5 percent. Taking care of yourself is about more than exercising and eating well. It’s about knowing yourself and what you need to feel whole.

“I am an introvert. When I travel and don’t have an evening business commitment, I often order room service so I can have quiet time by myself and recharge my battery,” Darlene said.

Build a support network. From family, to friends, to services you can outsource household work to, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

“I took turns with my husband to pick up the kids from school, asked my Mother who lived just an hour away to help out when I travel,” Darlene said. “I had a supportive boss to work flex hours. I used services available to pick up dry cleaning, clean the house, etc.”

Let go of being perfect. Release any pressure you feel to be a perfectionist.

“If the house is not clean, laundry piling up, dishes are not put away, don’t stress about it,” Darlene said. “Learn to live with imperfection — in the areas which are not your top priority.”

You can have it all. Accept that what defines “all” is everchanging, and you’ll discover that creating a life where family, self, work and community are integrated is not only possible, it’s achievable.

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The Untapped Potential of Feedback

Giving feedback is routine for leaders. But don’t let the everyday nature of feedback fool you — a single moment of giving feedback can have momentous impact, especially if the way it is delivered results in someone losing face.

Consider one of my clients, Mark. Mark manages Joseph, who is one of his top salespeople. Joseph is from the Philippines and Mark is born and raised in the U.S.

On one particular sales call, Joseph was trying to close a large deal with a potential customer. He got ahead of himself in his zeal to close the deal and made a commitment to provide additional services that weren’t normally included. He also hadn’t checked with his service department before making the commitment.

When Mark learned of this, he told Joseph that the company wasn’t prepared or able to provide the additional services he had promised. “In the future, you should check with the service department before offering items outside the normal scope of services.” Mark said.

Upon hearing the feedback, Joseph felt as if his actions jeopardized his future with the company. He submitted his resignation.

Surprised by this reaction, Mark immediately reassured Joseph that he was doing a great job. The feedback was meant to correct a simple miscalculation and was not a personal attack on Joseph’s character. He assured Joseph he appreciates his work and asked him to stay with the company. Joseph accepted.

People in Asian cultures often personalize negative feedback, perceiving it to be an attack on their character. They view feedback as a loss of face. While this reaction is pronounced in Asian cultures, it is a natural human response.

In commenting on neuroscience research for her forthcoming book on competencies for working across cultures, author and intercultural expert Diana Rowland notes that when we feel threatened, whether physically or emotionally, a distress signal from our brains creates an impulse to fight or flee. We become less able to use our prefrontal cortex, which deals with logic, empathy, and regulating social behavior, and instead react aggressively or defensively. We also create a negative memory, which is stronger and lasts longer than a positive one.

Negative feedback can create this kind of reaction, causing someone to lose face, often irreparably. We can avoid this by following a few guidelines for giving feedback:

Use “straight talk.”

When delivering feedback, make sure your message is communicated accurately and clearly, and in a way that makes the other person feel respected. Deliver it in a private, safe environment. Make sure the message is based on facts and expectations are clear.

The Center for Creative Leadership developed an effective approach called SBII: Situation>Behavior>Impact>Intent. First, describe the situation. Then, describe the observable behavior and the impact on you — what you thought and/or felt. Then, inquire about the intention behind the behavior.

For example: “At the staff meeting yesterday, you raised your voice when Sally questioned your financial data. It made me and the team feel uncomfortable about speaking up. What was going through your mind?”

This approach focuses on facts and behaviors. Defensive reactions are minimized, leading to productive conversation, desired outcomes, and no one losing face.

Avoid “blunt talk” and “safe talk.”

Instead of straight talk, most people use either blunt talk or safe talk to deliver feedback. Neither technique works.

With blunt talk, whether it’s the right place and time to deliver feedback isn’t considered. Clarity or accuracy aren’t important. The receiver’s feelings aren’t considered — the giver just needs to get things off their chest.

The impact of blunt talk is that the receiver does not feel respected and likely feels blamed or unappreciated. Walls are put up and the feedback is usually difficult to accept. The receiver becomes so resentful that they don’t make the needed changes.

Safe talk is the opposite, but equally damaging. Instead of being direct, hints are dropped. The message is vague and ambiguous. The manager thinks the feedback was provided, but the receiver is confused about what was said. They may even think everything is fine. While the manager may have thought they were saving face and preserving harmony, they’ve actually created confusion. The result is the same as blunt talk — nothing changes.

To assure feedback is understood and digested, and to preserve the dignity of the receiver, stick to straight talk.

Use positive feedback to “give face.”

Giving face is the opposite of losing face — you build a person’s confidence and, in turn, help them grow. This can be accomplished by giving positive feedback.

In “The Feedback Fallacy” (Harvard Business Review 2019), Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall note that managers often only give feedback after something goes wrong. The instinct is to tell someone what they did wrong and how to fix it. This is remediating, which inhibits learning and does not lead to strong performance.

Buckingham and Goodall encourage managers to stop someone when they’re doing something well and dissect their behavior or actions with them. This puts them into what they call a “rest and digest” state of mind, which helps them understand what strong performance looks and feels like, building confidence — and trust in their manager — in the long term.

Focus on feedforward, not feedback.

Feedforward is the opposite of feedback. Feedback focuses on the past. Feedforward focuses on the future. We can’t change the past, but we can create the future. Feedback can be demotivating, while feedforward is empowering.

It is necessary to deliver feedback, but don’t stop there. To set your employees up for success, take the time to coach them on lessons learned and practical next steps to move things forward.

Feedback is a necessary part of leadership. Use straight talk, give positive as well as negative feedback, give feedforward, and always keep the receiver’s dignity and “face” in mind. It is then that feedback can become one of your most powerful tools.

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These 3 Mindfulness Tactics Can Help Your Company Innovate

Recently, I discussed the first two steps to leading with an innovative mindset: building a learning culture and thinking globally. In this column, I’m exploring the final step: leading mindfully.

Mindfulness is a mental state. It’s defined as connecting to the present moment while, at the same time, acknowledging and accepting without judgment the feelings and thoughts that occur while being in the moment.

This state of mind can apply to leadership, too. A mindful leader gives space for themselves and others to reflect and to listen. They’re conscientious about how they show up as a leader. When a leader is thoughtful, reflective, calm and present, everyone else shows up that way, too.

There are three specific things mindful leaders can do to help foster a company-wide innovative mindset.

1. Create psychological safety. Harvard Business School professor Amy Edmondson defines psychological safety as a group culture in which everyone in the group feels they are safe to take risks. But what does that culture look like?

When Google set out to study its most high-performing teams, they discovered that in these teams, everyone took equal turns speaking. They had “high social sensitivity,” which means they were sensitive to the tone of voice, facial expressions and body language of their colleagues, and used this non-verbal information to really understand how their team members felt.

It’s in this kind of culture that people feel safest to express themselves, flex their creativity, and take the risks that lead to innovation. It takes an exceptionally mindful leader be aware of — and create — the conditions that lead to psychological safety.

2. Employ a cultural broker. By now, most companies are aware that diverse teams deliver better business results. But what many companies don’t know is how to facilitate and manage the conflicting norms, miscommunications, and misguided assumptions that can arise in diverse teams. This is where cultural brokerage comes in.

INSEAD professor Sujin Jang defines cultural brokerage as the act of facilitating interactions across parties from different cultural backgrounds. Someone who acts as a cultural broker acts as a bridge between teammates of different cultures.

There are two types of cultural brokers. The first, cultural insiders, have multicultural experiences that align directly with the cultures represented in their team. For example, in a team with mostly Chinese and American workers, a cultural insider is someone who has firsthand knowledge of both cultures. These cultural brokers can integrate information and ideas from both cultures, proposing ideas and solutions that combine elements of each.

The second type of cultural broker is the cultural outsider. This is someone with experience in two or more cultures not represented in their team. In this American and Chinese team example, a cultural outsider could have experience with, say, French and Malaysian cultures. Even though they don’t directly have knowledge of Chinese and American culture, their “cultural antenna” is sharper than their mono-cultural counterparts. Because of this, they can act as a neutral third party and facilitate the differences in backgrounds.

A mindful leader is aware of the needs of a diverse team. If someone doesn’t emerge as a natural cultural broker, a mindful leader recognizes the need for this role and enlists the help of an external intercultural consultant. When teams can work through cultural differences, they work more effectively and harmoniously — innovation thrives in those conditions.

3. Embrace work-life “integration” Experts have begun to recognize that the ideal of work-life balance is unrealistic — and even undesired, especially among millennial workers who often prefer flexibility, fluidity, and a seamless integration of their personal and professional lives.

These workers might reject a rigid 9-to-5 structure. They might not mind answering emails at 8 pm because they took a two-hour lunch to reconnect with a friend and left the office early for a family event. Work-life blending, harmony, and integration have begun to emerge as new ideals.

A mindful manager embraces this new norm — and they don’t assume identical lifestyles among their diverse team members. They understand their individual needs and support their efforts to find harmony. When workers feel confident they’re meeting the needs of their work and personal lives, they feel secure enough to bring their best selves to work. And that contributes to an innovative mindset.

By creating psychological safety, employing a cultural broker, and embracing work-life integration, a mindful leader helps foster an innovative mindset.

When it comes to your diverse team, how do you lead mindfully?

The post These 3 Mindfulness Tactics Can Help Your Company Innovate appeared first on Global Leadership Associates.

This Is the One Thing You Can Do to Keep Your Best Workers

Research consistently shows that the top reason people leave their jobs isn’t related to compensation, benefits, or even opportunities for career growth: It is that they don’t feel appreciated.

Recently, I’ve been writing about the Asian cultural concept of saving face, and how, when employed authentically, it can strengthen relationships and serve as cultural currency. But giving face can also help create a culture of respect and appreciation, one that can help you retain your best people – and get the best out of them.

Two of my clients have recently had experiences that illustrate how crucial face can be to showing appreciation, building trust, and retaining your best talent.

A shift in perspective

Martha and Beth are colleagues and equal partners working on a strategy project for their company. Martha perceives Beth as not delivering on her end of the work. She feels Beth expects her to do all the work. Martha says Beth holds meetings with others “just to build connections,” but shows no tangible results from the meetings. In all, Martha suspects Beth doesn’t know how to do the strategy work, but doesn’t want to admit it. She says she is saving face for Beth and protecting her credibility.

From Beth’s perspective, Martha is pushy, dominant, and not sensitive to others’ wellbeing. In meetings, Martha asks questions, but her tone is condescending: “What are your priorities? What resources do you have? Can you get it done?” Beth feels like she’s drowning, but Martha is not offering help or guidance – she’s only taking over the work for Beth.

For Beth to feel respected and appreciated, Martha needs to shift her perspective, realizing that a more collaborative approach will lead to a more productive, positive working relationship. Martha’s goal shouldn’t be to win or “be right” – she should realize that she and Beth are working towards the same end goal.

I encouraged Martha to be a thought partner to Beth, to frame the project’s success as their success. Her approach to communication shifted. Instead of asking questions like, “When will you get this done?” she emphasized collaboration, support, and a win/win for all: “What would be your top three priorities for Q2 that will bring a big win for you and your team?” “How can I support you?”

I also encouraged Martha to relate to Beth on a more human level, to show genuine interest in her life outside of work. This shift in communication style resulted in Beth feeling safer, less “underwater,” and appreciated. In these ways, Martha started to truly save face for Beth.

Moving on from a mistake

Carl is a highly successful leadership consultant. Several years ago, Carl worked for a consulting firm that served the private equity industry.The firm was preparing feedback on an organizational audit, which included evaluations on the effectiveness of each member of the executive team. Carl was tasked with compiling the aggregate results.

Unfortunately, when Carl forwarded the information to the client, he provided a spreadsheet rather than a PDF – this allowed more technologically savvy members of the executive team to trace back the feedback to the individuals that provided it, completely exposing them and violating confidentiality agreements.

Carl’s error threatened to jeopardize the entire project and the client’s trust in them as partners. “I remember the feeling like it was yesterday,” he recalls. “I remember walking in the door of my house, saying to myself, ‘I’m going to get fired, I’m going to get fired.'”

Fortunately, the company’s IT team was able to recall the message and destroy the data before it could get into more hands. Carl accepted full accountability. While the company CEO was forgiving, the private equity partner was not. He called Carl’s manager and demanded he be fired. His manager stood up for him, asserting his value on the team.

Carl continued through to the end of the project, but everything had changed. During later face-to-face sessions, the private equity partner would not make eye contact with him.

Carl soon left the firm, and feels the experience left a scar. “My suspicion has always been that sooner or later, the managing director of our firm would have let me go. He’d protected me externally, but he no longer believed in me as a strong A-player,” he says.

The truth is, Carl was an A-player who had simply made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes – it’s how we respond to those mistakes, as managers, that affects a worker’s later performance. Carl’s firm did not help him feel supported. They could not help him save face, and for that reason, they could not retain him.

If we want to retain our best talent and help them do their best work, we must build them up rather than belittle them. We must help them save face and learn from it when mistakes inevitably happen. Because retaining great talent is about more than compensation – it’s about respect, support, and face.

The post This Is the One Thing You Can Do to Keep Your Best Workers appeared first on Global Leadership Associates.

What Steve Jobs’ Approach to Conflict Can Teach You About Leadership

In recent articles, I have explored the Asian concept of “face,” and how, when used authentically, it serves as a social currency in family, friendship and in business.

In this article, I would like to take the discussion of “saving face” one step further with an exploration of more than just what saving face is. I would like to define what saving face is not.

Saving face is the act of helping someone recover after a mistake or misstep, in a way that preserves their dignity in the presence of their colleagues, community or family. When done authentically, with genuine intention and empathy, the act of saving face for someone can strengthen relationships and build trust between parties.

However, often we believe we are saving face, when, in fact, we are practicing behaviors that do more harm than good. It’s for this reason that understanding what face is not is as important as understanding what it is.

Saving face is not:

Conflict avoidance. For many people, conflict is uncomfortable. They feel it is more comfortable to ignore conflict, minimize it, or sweep it under the rug — and they may feel that these actions are just “saving face” for everyone involved.

But, in reality, the effect is the opposite. Not addressing conflict can fuel resentments among team members, as well as resentment toward the leaders who are not addressing the conflict. Ignoring a problem only makes it worse.

Saving face, on the other hand, takes courage. It is a vulnerable, brave act to publicly address an issue when it comes up. Getting issues on the table and working through them constructively fosters a healthy culture. And if you follow the tenets of saving face, which include acting with empathy and authenticity, conflict resolution can actually help build stronger relationships and trust.

To address conflict on-the-spot requires an absence of ego. Steve Jobs, who was well known for embracing a culture of constructive, lively debate at Apple, was once quoted as saying, “I don’t mind being wrong. And I’ll admit that I’m wrong a lot. It doesn’t really matter to me too much. What matters to me is that we do the right thing.” Instead of glossing over a moment of conflict, Jobs preferred to put ego aside and work through it. Even if he “lost,” the team “won.”

Tolerating bad behaviors or poor performance. When conflict avoidance is taken to an extreme, it often manifests as the avoidance of an entire person. Instead of addressing poor performance or bad behaviors head on, managers sometimes ignore or excuse them, often creating ineffective workarounds that add to everyone else’s workloads.

The manager might believe they are “saving face” by working around this person’s misgivings, instead of addressing them directly. But, instead, they are forcing other workers to pick up the slack, increasing the stress and resentment of an entire team.

Safe talk/Lip service. We all know the phrase “beat around the bush,” and the connotation is never positive. People can tell when other people are being inauthentic.

Saving face does not mean you dance around an issue, or drop hints to avoid confrontation and minimize discomfort. At best, the hints are never received. At worst, they result in mixed messages, confusion, frustration and resentment.

Covering up your own mistakes and avoiding accountability. When mistakes happen, take ownership of your actions. Do not point fingers at others. It takes integrity and courage to own up to your own mistakes and take actions to correct them. That’s leadership.

Being blunt or rude. We often praise “straight talk” and “brutal honesty” as desirable qualities in strong leaders, but these are too often expressed as blunt meanness devoid of tact or empathy. As researcher Brene Brown says, “Cruelty is cheap, easy, and rampant.”

Clarity doesn’t have to mean cruelty. It takes more deliberate thought, care and courage to address someone with clarity that is fueled by empathy. Be intentional with your words, always mindful of preserving the dignity of all parties involved — that is saving face.

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