Mark A. Rayner's Blog: Mark A. Rayner's Goodreads Blog, page 25

A romance for the ages

It began simply. He was out on his morning rampage when he crashed through the front gates of SeaWorld. She was doing the 10 am show, trying to keep her spirits up while simultaneously pleasing her human masters and keeping … Continue reading →

Ask General Kang: Um, is it time to panic?

You humans still have primitive brains, so I will try to be understanding about this need of yours to panic. One of your wisest humans wrote a book, upon the cover of which was the phrase “DON’T PANIC”. This is … Continue reading →

Yes, time travellers are idiots

Besides, killing Hitler is such a 1st year in the time-travel academy thing to do. Alltop is a great way to kill time.

With Great Fez Comes Great Responsibility

Long before Giuseppe Del Balso invented cross-dimensional rift surfing, full-frontal time travel, or the pleasures of Zoot, he had many adventures, riding through the Italian countryside on his iron Dobbin. Though invented to teach children how to ride a horse, … Continue reading →

Snacking Cake Revenge

Muffy and Cuddles were pretty sure they had the math right, but they had a lingering worry that the explosion might ignite the Earth’s atmosphere. On the other hand, the cat was certainly never going to bother them again. No … Continue reading →

Greetings from Bonodminton

Research scientists from GruntWerx 3000 (The Caring Company) were thrilled to finally track down the source of the mysterious transmissions the Corporate Imperium has been receiving for centuries, proving once and for all the existence of non-human non-robotic sources of … Continue reading →

Food for thought

Work has kept me away from my latest long fiction project for a while, and this quote keeps floating around my head. (That, and some kind of growling sound…) Alltop only growls when it’s happy. That cool background photo is … Continue reading →

The singularity can take so many forms!

Alltop has been ordered to destroy all humor aggregators.

Ask General Kang: How should I pick an eyebrow shape?

Generally speaking, there is an eyebrow shape that works with every type of face. If you are an über-chimp with a large cranial ridge, for example, then a properly shaped eyebrow can make or break your face. (I’m speaking metaphorically, … Continue reading →

Why’s Wally?

“I looked up at the mass of signs and stars in the night sky and laid myself open for the first time to the benign indifference of the world.” ― Albert Camus, The Stranger The shirt lay on his bed. … Continue reading →