Mark A. Rayner's Blog: Mark A. Rayner's Goodreads Blog, page 153

Blogger dies of exposure

LONDON, ON (The Skwib) — Yesterday the writer of the popular blog, Prawned! was found draped across his keyboard, unconscious.

Patrick Jones, aka Dedred S., was pronounced dead at the scene by the medical examiner.

Jones was known as an insightful and amusing commentator on the gaming and shrimping industries, and appeared as a regular commentator on many television and radio programs. He was also quoted extensively in Shrimper’s Times, the magazine of the shrimping industry.

Sorrowful family a

Greetings from Bonodminton

Research scientists from NaziWorks 3000 (The Caring Company) were thrilled to finally track down the source of the mysterious transmissions they had been receiving for centuries, proving once and for all the existence of non-human non-robotic sources of intelligence in the multi-verse.

Unfortunately, the creatures of Bonodminton have fixated on an unlikely “sport” outlawed by the Corporate Imperium twelve centuries ago for being extremely suggestive and silly.

The creatures will be eliminated as s

Goths of Summer

I love this video of Mark Aaron James singing his summertime ode to self-expression, black rubber & piercing. In addition to being a gentle and pointed satire, it is a lovely tune. Great lyrics:

I know you’ve got show the world you’ve got the deepest pain,

But now the PVC is chafing where it meets the chain,

Goths of summer, it’s a hard, hard world…

Click here to view the embedded video.

You can find it here if the embed thingy doesn’t work.

HT to Q and Goths in Hot Weather for leading me to this

Giganto-Schism

The Giganto-Schism occurred sometime just after the establishment of the Trans-Vatican and the first RoboPope, Clagnor The Irrefutably Lethal. (This was dawning of the Genetic Fruit-Topping Wars). While the people of St. Tropezia were still somewhat bemused by the dire calamities promised by the Trans-Catholic Church, they found themselves drawn irresistibly to the gigantic women of their saucy little planet, and formed the Giganto Creed.

In particular, they loved Our Lady of the Massive Legs an

Forty-Seven Signs of the Apocalypse (#39)

From the Book of Libations

And in this time, there shall be a service created by the forces of darkness and it shall be unearthly and virtual, and the Unbelievers will call it Ebay. And unto the Heathen in the Land of Sinim, there shall be knock-off services, the shadow of a shadow.

Lo! The Sinim will be plagued with False Prophets, and the worst of these shall be Zhou. And he shall harvest the Saliva of the Virgins of Sinim. Abomination will be compounded by the Evils of Commerce. And Zhou w

Cliché 2.0

Oh great. It wasn’t bad enough that every hack headline writer forced to slap a four-word précis on an article they didn’t understand has been using this bromide to bludgeon creativity into a senseless mess for years, now some kind of institution that claims to have expertise about language has elevated this linguistic turd by declaring it the one-millionth word in the English language.

If you have to be convinced of the dubiousness of this “institution’s” claims of expertise, you might want to

Zoological Wonders from Planet Earth

The French Harpy once roamed free in the pre-Euclidian Dynamic Structure Era, somewhat before the ascendancy of today’s Hyper-Clones, but well after the Genetic Fruit-Topping Wars.

When we say, “roamed”, we really mean “flew”, because as you can see from this French Harpy we meticulously reconstructed from a fragment of DNA, the Frarpy — as it was known colloquially — had rudimentary legs that was incapable of doing much more than gripping tree branches and wallets. Even from a flying perspectiv

Bringing Good Things to Life

Neil was a tiny and polite human employed by the General Entropy division of NaziWorks 3000 (The Caring Company), where he was an accomplished lamp.

For the most part, he was just happy not to be eaten by the large CEOs that roamed most of his planet, but his current supervisor had found him a choice placement.

Tina was the daughter of a mid-to-large Hyper-Clone outfitted with the devastating Clone 12000, and COO of a Regional Infection division within NaziWorks. Her father’s frequent explosive d