Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 55
May 11, 2024
May 11, 2024: The Crime Binge Continues – Alright, let’s get this over with!
Grace (2021 – ) Season 1
Drama following Brighton-based Detective Superintendent Roy Grace, a hard-working police officer who has given his life to the job.
My thoughts: Cheesy and contrived with a ridiculous medium angle.
2.5/5
Blood (2018 – 2020) Season 1
Cat Hogan returns to West Meath upon her mother’s sudden death–she had an accident at home and died (or was it an accident?). Blood is about old secrets, older betrayals, mind games, and the lies family tell each other.
My thoughts: Lethargic family thriller whose mystery hinges on some suspect character choices.
3/5
The Gulf (2019 – 2021) Season 1
A detective’s personal and professional life start to unravel when she is involved in a fatal car accident and begins to lose her memory.
My thoughts: Convenient amnesia, suspect policing, and an unlikable character make this one a pass.
2.5/5
Rosemary & Thyme (2003 – 2006) Season 1
Set amongst the stunning gardens of Europe, Rosemary Boxer and Laura Thyme, two professional gardeners, find themselves drawn into solving mysterious crimes.
My thoughts: A little too twee in tone and a little too pedestrian in its mysteries. Also, how many estate murders can these gardeners possibly stumble upon?
3/5
Hidden Assets (2021 – ) Season 1
When evidence from a raid links a small-time drug dealer to a series of bombings in Belgium, Irish detective Emer Berry heads to Antwerp, where she’s confronted by Christian de Jong of the anti-terrorism squad. Together, they begin to untangle an international conspiracy involving drugs, terrorism, and corrupt business and political leaders.
My thoughts: Just another in a long line of “Looks like Islamist terrorists but it’s really right-wing extremists” programming. See yesterday’s blog entry: Generate your own AI script using one of the following super-fresh plot prompts!
The post May 11, 2024: The Crime Binge Continues – Alright, let’s get this over with! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 10, 2024
Generate your own A.I. crime show script using one of the flollowing super-fresh plot prompts!
A male detective investigates the death/disappearance of his daughter.
Detectives race against time to avert a dark web slave auction sale/murder.
Those responsible for the terror threat turn out to be…far-right terrorists!
A wife exacts revenge on the criminals who killed her criminal husband
A detective and a serial killer team up to solve a baffling case. Sparks fly!
A super old guy teams up with a super young gal to solve a case that would be better handled by someone far more competent.
Strange occurrences in a remote community suggest supernatural forces at play. But in the end, turns out it’s not supernatural forces at all. Or is it?!
Contribute your own super-fresh prompts in the comments!
Kicking off the Stargate’s Greatest Villain Tournament. Cast your vote!
https://twitter.com/BaronDestructo/status/1789024867867619704
The post Generate your own A.I. crime show script using one of the flollowing super-fresh plot prompts! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 9, 2024
May 9, 2024: Recent Yes/No’s – Best and Worst!
Mochikie? Yes/Nohttps://t.co/RIEZYcJFz8
— Joseph Mallozzi
(@BaronDestructo) April 18, 2024
Hojicha Donuts? Yes/No
Mister Donut ready to make hojicha dreams come true in latest collab with Kyoto tea merchant https://t.co/Uj3P6HMUtl via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Mountain Dew Baja Fiery Mango Doritos? Yes/No
Thanks(?) to @Thogar for the tip.https://t.co/Rd9AAdkllD
— Joseph Mallozzi
Pancake Pie? Yes/No
McDonald’s Japan releases a pancake pie for new retro kissaten coffeeshop series https://t.co/Q6f0OM5E9l via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Starbucks Spicy Lemonade? Yes/No
Starbucks Launches Spicy Lemonade Refreshers https://t.co/hksRNAeAoV pic.twitter.com/yFotem3NNA
— Joseph Mallozzi
Pretzel Roast Beef Burger? Yes/No
Wendy’s releases a Pretzel Roast Beef Burger aimed at foreign tourists in Japan https://t.co/xMCXUbcY10 via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
French Fries Bread? Yes/No
French Fries Bread in Tokyo’s Shibuya becomes a hit on social media https://t.co/iABPK6b1dp via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Tequila Seltzer? Yes/Nohttps://t.co/Qc5ynHr4cU
— Joseph Mallozzi
Motto Frappuccino? Yes/No
Starbucks Japan adds a Motto Frappuccino to the menu for a limited time https://t.co/snl9I63lYE via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Massive Matcha Parfait? Yes/No
Japan’s massive matcha parfait weighs 6 kilos, contains hidden surprises for anyone who eats it https://t.co/rF8iDPrqwp via @RocketNews24En
— Joseph Mallozzi
Best: Massive Matcha Parfait
Worst: Tequila Seltzer
The post May 9, 2024: Recent Yes/No’s – Best and Worst! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 8, 2024
May 8, 2024: Amazing Covers!
A few that caught my eye this week…
Daredevil: Black Armor – cover art by Paulo Siqueira
Doctor Strange #15 – cover art by Alex Ross
Fantastic Four #20 – cover art by Alex Ross
Fantastic Four #20 – cover art by Rod Reis
Web of Spider-Man #1 – cover art by Ryan Brown
Essential Judge Anderson: Satan – cover art by Arthur Ranson
The Valiants #1 – cover art by Nico Di Mattia
Batman #147 – cover art by Kendrick Kunkka Lim
Birds of Prey #9 – cover art by Christian Ward
Poison Ivy #22 – cover art by R. Kikuo Johnson
So, which were YOUR favorites?
The post May 8, 2024: Amazing Covers! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 7, 2024
May 7, 2024: The Crime Binge continues!
Defending Jacob (2020)
The limited drama series is a gripping, character-driven thriller based on the 2012 New York Times best selling novel of the same name by William Landay. An assistant DA’s world is shattered when his beloved son gets charged with murder.
My thoughts: Gets off to a good start, then gets bogged down by the standard cliched (“Someone has sprinted MURDERER on their garage door!”, “The friendly wannabe-confidante turns out to be a sneaky reporter!”). The ending is unsatisfying and strays from the novel, further alienating fans of the books.
2.5/5
Queens of Mystery (2019 – ) Season 2
Three crime-writing sisters and their 28-year old niece use their extensive knowledge of crime to solve whodunit style murders in the picturesque English village of Wildemarsh.
My thoughts: I didn’t realize they had replaced the lead until the third episode. Anyway, the characters are charming enough but the mysteries too insubstantial to warrant me checking out a third season.
3/5
Father & Son (2009)
Ex Manchester gangland boss Michael O’Connor, who is now happily settled in rural Ireland, is forced to go back to Manchester when his son Sean is found guilty of the murder of a gang member.
My thoughts: Dougray Scott delivers a stellar performance in this lightly plotted drama
3/5
Agatha Raisin (2014 – ) Season 1
The Cotswolds-based PR guru turned amateur sleuth returns for a series of comedic murder-mysteries based on the books by M.C. Beaton.
My thoughts: Overall, a little too silly and law enforcement a little too dumb for my taste.
3/5
Banshee (2013 – 2016) Season 1
An ex-con assumes the identity of a murdered sheriff in the small town of Banshee, Pennsylvania, where he has some unfinished business.
My thoughts: Anthony Starr is great but the bad guys felt T.V. Light and the sex scenes gratuitous and kinda silly. Ultimately, cable shows tend to date themselves a lot quicker than streaming shows.
3.5/5
The post May 7, 2024: The Crime Binge continues! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 6, 2024
May 6, 2024: This and That!
To be honest, the new Canadian Army icon looks like a pixelated beaver taking a shit. pic.twitter.com/YmzC5gQV04
— Joseph Mallozzi
Can't believe they put out this limited edition Klaus Schwab action figure. https://t.co/MhPDgKFDED pic.twitter.com/JIowcV2HMi
— Joseph Mallozzi
Working on a sci-fi script about an insidious government that sabotages its own economy, intentionally triggering a hyper-inflationary death spiral so that it can usher in a digital currency to control its citizens. What should I call it?
— Joseph Mallozzi
Tonight is the Met Gala! Can’t wait to see all of the incredible fashion, but I think it’ll be tough to beat last year…
Kay Perry has arrived at the #MetGala pic.twitter.com/iznpi18G26
— Joseph Mallozzi
Bradley Cooper leaving the parking lot at the #MetGala pic.twitter.com/kYScepvk8M
— Joseph Mallozzi
Nicole Kidman in beautiful Studio Ghibli-inspired outfit lining up to use the bathroom at the #MetGala pic.twitter.com/SvsOeW3tZ9
— Joseph Mallozzi
Anne Hathaway waiting for the valet to validate her parking ticket #MetGala pic.twitter.com/RzaHxoia2b
— Joseph Mallozzi
The post May 6, 2024: This and That! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 5, 2024
May 5, 2024: Sharky (and Suji!) Sunday!
Some awesome Sharky artwork from @major_bacon on Instagram:
Play date with Bubbie!
Savoring his snack…
Negotiating the hallway –
Today would have been Suji’s 19th birthday. A few memories of our old irascible gal –
The post May 5, 2024: Sharky (and Suji!) Sunday! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 4, 2024
May 4, 2024: Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons!
How many do you remember?
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: The Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers pic.twitter.com/keoHJmB7PB
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: M.A.S.K.
M.A.S.K. ("Mobile Armored Strike Kommand") operate transforming armored vehicles in their ongoing battle against the criminal organization V.E.N.O.M. (Vicious Evil Network of Mayhem). Also, everyone wears masks. pic.twitter.com/1BQ9ertMfh
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Silverhawks
Cyborg heroes the Silverhawks battle the evil Mon-Star, intergalactic crime boss and his gang. pic.twitter.com/TYkCbzrziY
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Centurions
Max Ray, Jake Rockwell, and Ace McCloud use their exo-frames and assault weapons to thwart Doc Terror and his cyborg companion Hacker. The theme song is, uh, not so catchy. pic.twitter.com/aNK395U2nT
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light
Following a massive EMP that wipes out planetary technology, two factions – the Spectral Knight and the Darkling Lords – vie for magical totems in a competition organized by the wizard Merklynn. pic.twitter.com/ixgMX3Ltys
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Ulysses 31
Captain Ulysses and the crew of the Odyssey are cursed by the Gods of Olympus to travel the universe until they find the Kingdom of Heaven. pic.twitter.com/mVAizlfbmg
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Challenge of the GoBots
On the techno-planet Gobotron, Leader-1 and the Guardians battle the evil Cy-Kill and his Renegades pic.twitter.com/9sFnH7eF2x
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Moby Dick and the Mighty Mightor
Teenage caveman Tor (not to be confused with Thor) wields a magic club that, once raised to the heavens, transforms him into a superhero. Like, uh, the Mighty Thor. pic.twitter.com/tMfc5JWaaV
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Blackstar
Astronaut John Blackstar and his allies battle the tyrannical Overlord on a primitive world in this animated series with an opening theme that could best be described as a salute to the 1978 Superman film. pic.twitter.com/Zw75CB1wzx
— Joseph Mallozzi
Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons: Thundarr the Barbarian
Thundarr travels a post-apocalyptic Earth with his allies Ookla the Mok and Princess Ariel, battling the forces of evil with his fabulous sun sword. pic.twitter.com/qqNp4t33Eo
— Joseph Mallozzi
The post May 4, 2024: Forgotten Saturday Morning Cartoons! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 3, 2024
May 3, 2024: This and That!
I need these!
To add to my gargantuan supervillain collection gathering dust in our guest room.
The appointed experts of the current crackerjack administration…
This is terrifying.
This is the Chair of the Council of Economic Advisers, the agency providing the President with economic advice on domestic and international economic policy.
Has no idea WTF he is talking about.
Credit to @DylanLeClair_ pic.twitter.com/iaDhiNy2K7
— The Wolf Of All Streets (@scottmelker) May 3, 2024
Question “Whats on the ‘dark side’ of the moon?”
Answer “We don’t know”
— Brian Roemmele (@BrianRoemmele) April 23, 2024
Meanwhile…
"……the day she was put down was the day she massacred livestock that were part of our neighbors, attacked me, got some school kids hooked on crystal meth, and posted a bunch of pro-Putin tweets so I had to make the hard decision…" https://t.co/EBlZOIsfed
— Joseph Mallozzi
I worked with a line producer who swore by raw onion sandwiches – washed down with a glass of buttermilk. https://t.co/cuCuRT2THe
— Joseph Mallozzi
Which makes me flashback to this undefeated writer’s room sandwich –
Gif me a fantastic ending pic.twitter.com/0YUWnAAsWO
— Joseph Mallozzi
And don’t say The Sopranos. Them’s fighting words.
Perhaps more disappointingly, fewer than 2% mentioned hippo insemination.
"Only 32 of the Top Movies in the Last Decade Say Climate Change Exists — Study" https://t.co/wFZ3kXCG1Z via @IndieWire
— Joseph Mallozzi
The post May 3, 2024: This and That! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
May 2, 2024
May 2, 2024: The Crime Binge continues with five more crime drama bullet reviews!
Killer Soup (2024 – ) Season 1
Swathi dreams of owning a restaurant. But when murder derails her plan, she and her lover take an outrageous step – to replace him with her husband.
My thoughts: Just too damn silly to take seriously.
2/5
Hijack (2023 – )
A plane from Dubai to London is hijacked over a 7-hour flight, while authorities on the ground scramble for answers.
My thoughts: Not even Idris Elba can save this terminally dumb thriller that continuously defies logic over the course of its much-too-long 8 episode span.
2.5/5
The Boat Story (2023)
Two hard-up strangers stumble across a haul of cocaine on a shipwrecked boat. After agreeing to sell it and split the cash, they become entangled with police, masked hitmen and a sharp-suited gangster known as ‘The Tailor’.
My thoughts: Riddled with plot holes, this presumed dark comedy also misfires on a tonal level. A highly unpleasant watch.
2/5
Criminal Record (2024)
Follows two brilliant detectives in a tug of war over a historic murder conviction and the quest to find common ground in a polarized Britain.
My thoughts: Perfectly fine from a production standpoint but, ultimately, just another in the long line of too-long corrupt cop procedurals.
3/5
Elite (2018 – 2024) Season 4
A stern principal and three new students begin at Las Encinas. Omar and Samuel must prove themselves academically while their friends try to help.
My thoughts: I’ve always admired this show’s ability to deliver the sex and soap along with a compelling mystery, but with the cast changes, this season feels like a pale shadow of its former fresher installments.
The post May 2, 2024: The Crime Binge continues with five more crime drama bullet reviews! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.
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