Tremayne Moore's Blog, page 10
September 24, 2014
The Lost Sheep vs. The Found Sheep
As I was about to leave my apartment to head to work this morning, my heart was heavy with this issue. I'm reflecting a ministry call from last night and my brother (Prophet Norman Quarles) brought up a passage that made me think about this blog that I've been sitting on since the spring of this year. He mentioned Acts 4-5 (one of my favorite sections in the book of Acts) where the disciples were being persecuted and were going to Jerusalem to get refilled with the Holy Spirit. But Jesus had to force them out of their comfort zone so that the great commission can be fulfilled. To get people in church nowadays to go outside their comfort zone and preach the gospel is like pulling teeth. I guess it's easier to invite someone to come to church than it is to minister the gospel. As a result, we tend to stay within the found sheep where it's comfortable, and then what happens is that complacency sets in.
Luke 15:1-7 Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, "This man receives sinners and eats with them." So he told them this parable:"What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost.' Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.
In today's society, we focus more on church growth than we do seeing people getting saved or healed right where they are. We don't meet people where they are from a salvation perspective, but more from a church growth perspective. Sure, they can come to church, but if they don't get saved, it's pointless. Something said from the pulpit and our attitude towards those who are lost (note they will not have a sign on their head saying "Non-Christian"), should cause their hearts to stir and consider who Jesus really is.
In 2011, while writing my novel DDBS, God have me an acronym "AMCC," and it stands for American Middle Class Church. If you look at the job market and the attitudes of people who are considered "middle class," you'll find the mentality is "all about me, my family, and my clique" and everyone else can fall by the wayside. Sadly, we carry that mentality into the church world, where special prayers are for the elite group. If you're outside the group, you have to pray for yourself (and I got that from many people writing that novel - refer to my blog earlier this month When I Wanted To Die and from July of this year How Suicides Can Be Prevented). One principle of the AMCC is that the found sheep are more important than the lost sheep. It's been said, "the found sheep are to be like puppies in a box looking after each other."
I've taken a lot of flak from people within the body of Christ and to include my local church for that acronym (I did a series on the AMCC back in March/April 2013). Now for clarity, there is no church called that. It's a mentality (regardless of your skin color). In fact, it's hard to tell who's worse. But let me talk about my race for a moment and how we act with that mentality. In this mentality, we easily forget about the lost sheep unless it boosts their reputation among their clique. Another thing that happens is we look for other found sheep with titles - sadly some give themselves titles and then get big headed. And that's one thing God does NOT need. While I'm on that, a serious tragedy that can happen as a result is that we focus on our OWN agenda and start using people (or entertain impostors who say they are part of the five-fold) and the minute you see a flaw, you cut them off unless they itch your ear and/or they have a title next to their name.
Here's another attitude that comes up when you're focused on the found sheep (living with the AMCC mentality), someone asks you for prayer, but you won't because you have so much hatred, envy, or jealousy towards them and because they're not part of your clique. In fact, they (leaders and his/her members) envy your anointing because they see how your heart is in sync with the Father's heart. In short: you're a poster child of ridicule to them! Leaders with an AMCC mentality ensure that those seeking the lost sheep and not on the church's agenda are targeted, and will inform their members who are the outcasts to ensure their circle remains tight.
A warning that needs to ring out loud and clear: the AMCC mentality is not of God, people of God. People are dying under our watch. And just because they're not part of your clique does not mean they're not worthy of love. We need to stop focusing on the found sheep and start fulfilling the great commission. I look at my novel DDBS and a lot of people criticized me (and some have cut me off) for dealing with two depressing topics that need to be addressed in the world and the church (sexual abuse & suicide). I have read testimonies from people inside and outside the US of how it's saved their life or they're now considering Christianity, that says a lot; but I simply say glory to God.
Yes, we do need a covering of a church (and some need to stay under it), but everybody has a part in fulfilling the great commission in Matthew 28:18-20. Now there are many who are commissioned to go outside the four walls (which I believe I am as well), because God knows their heart is in sync with God (seeking and saving the lost - Jude 20-23 - and not solely seeking them to attend your particular church). Now inviting people to church is NOT a bad thing, but if it becomes the focus, churches can easily get big headed. If you look at Acts 8, Philip was not focused on getting the eunuch to come to church, his focus was for the eunuch to understand the gospel. God is an unconventional God (and as my brother would say, His character does not change). I believe our priorities are out of place. Now I'm used to people having a problem with what I say or taking things I say out of context; my thought is to just let the gainsayers be who they are and pray for them (after I clarify my statements). When people speak out on this, persecution is inevitable because this definitely won't itch the ear.
Earlier in the blog, I referenced Luke 15. If you were to read the rest of the chapter, you'll find people going after their lost coin or their lost son. We all have that great commission. If you're relying on the church leaders to do all of the work in teaching the lost, we have a problem. If you're not even thinking about the lost (unless it's part of your AMCC clique), you have a problem. Thinking outside the AMCC box will bring ridicule, shame or possibly excommunication from your respective clique or church.
Here's a freebie, if we could show more love and compassion to everyone, then there would be no need for one person (typically the pastor) to take up the slack of what the congregation should be doing already.
Ok, now that my heart & spirit is emptied, I'm going to stop here. I pray that this moves you to have a heart for the lost and to see the chains fall off of people who are hurting.
Blessings.
The Mayne Man
Luke 15:1-7 Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, "This man receives sinners and eats with them." So he told them this parable:"What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost.' Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.
In today's society, we focus more on church growth than we do seeing people getting saved or healed right where they are. We don't meet people where they are from a salvation perspective, but more from a church growth perspective. Sure, they can come to church, but if they don't get saved, it's pointless. Something said from the pulpit and our attitude towards those who are lost (note they will not have a sign on their head saying "Non-Christian"), should cause their hearts to stir and consider who Jesus really is.
In 2011, while writing my novel DDBS, God have me an acronym "AMCC," and it stands for American Middle Class Church. If you look at the job market and the attitudes of people who are considered "middle class," you'll find the mentality is "all about me, my family, and my clique" and everyone else can fall by the wayside. Sadly, we carry that mentality into the church world, where special prayers are for the elite group. If you're outside the group, you have to pray for yourself (and I got that from many people writing that novel - refer to my blog earlier this month When I Wanted To Die and from July of this year How Suicides Can Be Prevented). One principle of the AMCC is that the found sheep are more important than the lost sheep. It's been said, "the found sheep are to be like puppies in a box looking after each other."
I've taken a lot of flak from people within the body of Christ and to include my local church for that acronym (I did a series on the AMCC back in March/April 2013). Now for clarity, there is no church called that. It's a mentality (regardless of your skin color). In fact, it's hard to tell who's worse. But let me talk about my race for a moment and how we act with that mentality. In this mentality, we easily forget about the lost sheep unless it boosts their reputation among their clique. Another thing that happens is we look for other found sheep with titles - sadly some give themselves titles and then get big headed. And that's one thing God does NOT need. While I'm on that, a serious tragedy that can happen as a result is that we focus on our OWN agenda and start using people (or entertain impostors who say they are part of the five-fold) and the minute you see a flaw, you cut them off unless they itch your ear and/or they have a title next to their name.
Here's another attitude that comes up when you're focused on the found sheep (living with the AMCC mentality), someone asks you for prayer, but you won't because you have so much hatred, envy, or jealousy towards them and because they're not part of your clique. In fact, they (leaders and his/her members) envy your anointing because they see how your heart is in sync with the Father's heart. In short: you're a poster child of ridicule to them! Leaders with an AMCC mentality ensure that those seeking the lost sheep and not on the church's agenda are targeted, and will inform their members who are the outcasts to ensure their circle remains tight.
A warning that needs to ring out loud and clear: the AMCC mentality is not of God, people of God. People are dying under our watch. And just because they're not part of your clique does not mean they're not worthy of love. We need to stop focusing on the found sheep and start fulfilling the great commission. I look at my novel DDBS and a lot of people criticized me (and some have cut me off) for dealing with two depressing topics that need to be addressed in the world and the church (sexual abuse & suicide). I have read testimonies from people inside and outside the US of how it's saved their life or they're now considering Christianity, that says a lot; but I simply say glory to God.
Yes, we do need a covering of a church (and some need to stay under it), but everybody has a part in fulfilling the great commission in Matthew 28:18-20. Now there are many who are commissioned to go outside the four walls (which I believe I am as well), because God knows their heart is in sync with God (seeking and saving the lost - Jude 20-23 - and not solely seeking them to attend your particular church). Now inviting people to church is NOT a bad thing, but if it becomes the focus, churches can easily get big headed. If you look at Acts 8, Philip was not focused on getting the eunuch to come to church, his focus was for the eunuch to understand the gospel. God is an unconventional God (and as my brother would say, His character does not change). I believe our priorities are out of place. Now I'm used to people having a problem with what I say or taking things I say out of context; my thought is to just let the gainsayers be who they are and pray for them (after I clarify my statements). When people speak out on this, persecution is inevitable because this definitely won't itch the ear.
Earlier in the blog, I referenced Luke 15. If you were to read the rest of the chapter, you'll find people going after their lost coin or their lost son. We all have that great commission. If you're relying on the church leaders to do all of the work in teaching the lost, we have a problem. If you're not even thinking about the lost (unless it's part of your AMCC clique), you have a problem. Thinking outside the AMCC box will bring ridicule, shame or possibly excommunication from your respective clique or church.
Here's a freebie, if we could show more love and compassion to everyone, then there would be no need for one person (typically the pastor) to take up the slack of what the congregation should be doing already.
Ok, now that my heart & spirit is emptied, I'm going to stop here. I pray that this moves you to have a heart for the lost and to see the chains fall off of people who are hurting.
Blessings.
The Mayne Man
September 10, 2014
When I Wanted To Die (World Suicide Prevention Day)
Today is World Suicide Awareness Day. Before I share my story of when I wanted to die, I want to give those who don’t have an understanding of how real suicide is. According to http://www.iasp.info/wspd/, “suicide is a major public health problem. The psychological pain that leads each of these individuals to take their lives is unimaginable. Their deaths leave families and friends bereft, and often have a major ripple effect on communities. Every year, over 800,000 almost people die from suicide; this roughly corresponds to one death every 40 seconds. The number of lives lost each year through suicide exceeds the number of deaths due to homicide and war combined. Suicide is the fifth leading causes of death among those aged 30-49 years in 2012 globally, and is the second leading cause of death in the 15-29 years age group in 2012 globally. Overall, it is estimated that during 2012 for each adult who died of suicide there were over 20 others who made suicide attempts. In 2012, suicide accounted for 1.4% of all deaths worldwide, making it the 15th leading cause of death. Mental disorders (particularly depression and alcohol use disorders) are a major risk factor for suicide in Europe and North America; however, in Asian countries impulsiveness plays an important role. Suicide is complex with psychological, social, biological, cultural and environmental factors involved.”
That says a lot, and while I was writing my novel Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid (DDBS for short) between 2010 and 2012 (addressing child sexual abuse – based on my real-life story of abuse – and teenage suicide), I went through a suicide spell in December of 2011. Part of the note is in DDBS, but I want to share it with you in its raw form (not to glorify suicide, but to let you know how real it is and that we must have a heart for those who are struggling with life).
December 3, 2011 (an e-mail to a few people close to my heart):My life is a constant fight, considering I have mental problems through the neglect of my parents during the course of my abuse - which I am not trying to claim the victim role - it's hard. People are saying I should be married. If I'm not then I'm a homosexual. I am tired of fighting. My life has been constant suffering - over my life - for the concern of others. When it’s all said and done, everything is my fault! It's my fault if I'm not married, if people turn their backs on me. I am trying to keep things in perspective here. I want to grieve over what God grieves.
One thing about my family, they are so nosy and paranoid of what I do (considering I'm the oldest). This is partly why I'm writing this novel about my childhood abuse and the main character is going to lose his life (maybe this suffering is for the novel).
Moving along, here's what I really want to say. I'm like this when everyone acts as if I don't exist in their world. Everyone is important to me. I understand about the concept of letting go (that's not so bad). I'm trying hard and want to. Everything is my fault. People are saying to me, "you need to be married, you need to be married; if you're not, you're a punk!" And sure I'm trying to look for love. But when I get this kind of treatment from women (for the past 25 years of my life, you want to give up and say love isn't meant for me, and I've had enough of trying to find a marriage partner). Women are typically saying, "you did this, you're not my type, I only see you as a friend - from Christian and non-Christian women. Why am I on a quest for love when I'm just taking up people's space? Sure, I play a role in other people's lives, but I guess that's it! And again, it's my fault and no one cares of what I do. I wanted to give this an example, because this is the pain I feel in my life. If I had a weapon to my head, people would simply say, "I'm sorry, or I'll pray for you." What? I am about to take my life and that's all you're going to say? That's painful (from Christians & non-Christians). Again, I'm not going to do anything rash, but this is what I feel. Yes, it's a casting down imaginations case, and I know God loves me (though I don't understand when my life is so full of suffering). Sure, I have my life, but my brief moments of smiles are turned to deep sadness. Everybody's saying, enjoy everyday life (how, when everything is crashing - unless I'm supposed to wear a plastic smile). Other than God, there is no happiness in my life. Of course, I can't wait to be with Him when my life is over; meanwhile, I'm miserable and don't know how much more I take. Everyday, it's a constant battle in my mind and I'm already in the looney bin! I just want to be free.
I'm not trying to say I'm a victim by any means. I just want someone to say it's going to be alright!
When I look back at the note, you would be surprised as to how many responses I got. They ranged from “you should be thankful for the pain you went through,” to “you need to just get over it (in short, I don’t want to hear it).” A month later, I called the suicide hotline here in Tallahassee. I told them what was going on and that I didn't want to live. Their response wasn't what's going on, but it went like this, "try to think of something positive." I thought to myself, that's not the wisest thing to say when a teen or an adult has a gun to their head. It made me think long and hard as to why the suicide rates are so high.
I remember a woman posted on social media stating that she was going to take her own life. It was baffling to see how many people were telling her to get over it and talking down to her. I just inboxed her and said this: “if you happen to get this message, give me a call and here’s my number.” About 4 hours later, she called me and all I said was this: “you have my undivided attention, talk to me.” She shared what was on her heart and all I did was listen to her heart. Just a simple ear to a hurting soul can help prevent suicide.
In closing: Many people who are on the verge of suicide really do care about the hearts of others, and many of us probably overlook what they’re going through by saying they are oversensitive or melodramatic. When they realize they are not heard, they will do something rash. If we would stop and understand the hearts of others instead of being so judgmental, we could speak life and encouragement to broken and hurting people.
Many suicides are linked to past abuse, and here’s my take on that: We are on the brink of losing the next generation. And it’s sad that the only remedy for an abused child is drugs or illicit sex. This is part of the reason some kids and even adults commit suicide. It’s a tragedy that shouldn’t happen this way, considering we “so holy people” are re-victimizing the abused, while the abuser gets away with a crime they should be charged with. If we don’t care for those who are abused, they will either take their own lives, or they will become sadistic and take somebody else’s life.
People who are considering or attempting suicide REALLY don’t want to die, they want to live. We must be willing to help them live.
Because today is suicide prevention awareness, I want to do something special. If you were intrigued by this, I encourage you get the book that addresses suicide prevention. It’s entitled Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid: Michael Anderson’s Fight for Life. I will personally autograph it and send you a special gift along with the book. Attached is the link: http://maynetre.com/mm/books/deaf-dumb-blind-stupid-michael-andersons-fight-for-life/
I am totally committed to sounding the alarm on how real suicide is and what we can do to prevent it. Here’s a blog I did a few months back entitled How Suicides Can Be Prevented. http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/07/how-suicides-can-be-prevented.html
And a bonus: Why People Are Oblivious to Abuse & Suicide: http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/08/why-people-are-oblivious-to-abuse.html
Blessings:The Mayne Man
That says a lot, and while I was writing my novel Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid (DDBS for short) between 2010 and 2012 (addressing child sexual abuse – based on my real-life story of abuse – and teenage suicide), I went through a suicide spell in December of 2011. Part of the note is in DDBS, but I want to share it with you in its raw form (not to glorify suicide, but to let you know how real it is and that we must have a heart for those who are struggling with life).
December 3, 2011 (an e-mail to a few people close to my heart):My life is a constant fight, considering I have mental problems through the neglect of my parents during the course of my abuse - which I am not trying to claim the victim role - it's hard. People are saying I should be married. If I'm not then I'm a homosexual. I am tired of fighting. My life has been constant suffering - over my life - for the concern of others. When it’s all said and done, everything is my fault! It's my fault if I'm not married, if people turn their backs on me. I am trying to keep things in perspective here. I want to grieve over what God grieves.
One thing about my family, they are so nosy and paranoid of what I do (considering I'm the oldest). This is partly why I'm writing this novel about my childhood abuse and the main character is going to lose his life (maybe this suffering is for the novel).
Moving along, here's what I really want to say. I'm like this when everyone acts as if I don't exist in their world. Everyone is important to me. I understand about the concept of letting go (that's not so bad). I'm trying hard and want to. Everything is my fault. People are saying to me, "you need to be married, you need to be married; if you're not, you're a punk!" And sure I'm trying to look for love. But when I get this kind of treatment from women (for the past 25 years of my life, you want to give up and say love isn't meant for me, and I've had enough of trying to find a marriage partner). Women are typically saying, "you did this, you're not my type, I only see you as a friend - from Christian and non-Christian women. Why am I on a quest for love when I'm just taking up people's space? Sure, I play a role in other people's lives, but I guess that's it! And again, it's my fault and no one cares of what I do. I wanted to give this an example, because this is the pain I feel in my life. If I had a weapon to my head, people would simply say, "I'm sorry, or I'll pray for you." What? I am about to take my life and that's all you're going to say? That's painful (from Christians & non-Christians). Again, I'm not going to do anything rash, but this is what I feel. Yes, it's a casting down imaginations case, and I know God loves me (though I don't understand when my life is so full of suffering). Sure, I have my life, but my brief moments of smiles are turned to deep sadness. Everybody's saying, enjoy everyday life (how, when everything is crashing - unless I'm supposed to wear a plastic smile). Other than God, there is no happiness in my life. Of course, I can't wait to be with Him when my life is over; meanwhile, I'm miserable and don't know how much more I take. Everyday, it's a constant battle in my mind and I'm already in the looney bin! I just want to be free.
I'm not trying to say I'm a victim by any means. I just want someone to say it's going to be alright!
When I look back at the note, you would be surprised as to how many responses I got. They ranged from “you should be thankful for the pain you went through,” to “you need to just get over it (in short, I don’t want to hear it).” A month later, I called the suicide hotline here in Tallahassee. I told them what was going on and that I didn't want to live. Their response wasn't what's going on, but it went like this, "try to think of something positive." I thought to myself, that's not the wisest thing to say when a teen or an adult has a gun to their head. It made me think long and hard as to why the suicide rates are so high.
I remember a woman posted on social media stating that she was going to take her own life. It was baffling to see how many people were telling her to get over it and talking down to her. I just inboxed her and said this: “if you happen to get this message, give me a call and here’s my number.” About 4 hours later, she called me and all I said was this: “you have my undivided attention, talk to me.” She shared what was on her heart and all I did was listen to her heart. Just a simple ear to a hurting soul can help prevent suicide.
In closing: Many people who are on the verge of suicide really do care about the hearts of others, and many of us probably overlook what they’re going through by saying they are oversensitive or melodramatic. When they realize they are not heard, they will do something rash. If we would stop and understand the hearts of others instead of being so judgmental, we could speak life and encouragement to broken and hurting people.
Many suicides are linked to past abuse, and here’s my take on that: We are on the brink of losing the next generation. And it’s sad that the only remedy for an abused child is drugs or illicit sex. This is part of the reason some kids and even adults commit suicide. It’s a tragedy that shouldn’t happen this way, considering we “so holy people” are re-victimizing the abused, while the abuser gets away with a crime they should be charged with. If we don’t care for those who are abused, they will either take their own lives, or they will become sadistic and take somebody else’s life.
People who are considering or attempting suicide REALLY don’t want to die, they want to live. We must be willing to help them live.
Because today is suicide prevention awareness, I want to do something special. If you were intrigued by this, I encourage you get the book that addresses suicide prevention. It’s entitled Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid: Michael Anderson’s Fight for Life. I will personally autograph it and send you a special gift along with the book. Attached is the link: http://maynetre.com/mm/books/deaf-dumb-blind-stupid-michael-andersons-fight-for-life/
I am totally committed to sounding the alarm on how real suicide is and what we can do to prevent it. Here’s a blog I did a few months back entitled How Suicides Can Be Prevented. http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/07/how-suicides-can-be-prevented.html
And a bonus: Why People Are Oblivious to Abuse & Suicide: http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/08/why-people-are-oblivious-to-abuse.html
Blessings:The Mayne Man
September 9, 2014
Jabez Vs. Solomon
Colossians 2:8 says this: See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.
Philosophy according to the Greek dictionary means the love and pursuit of wisdom. When we think of philosophy today, it's considered the study of men and women and their ideologies. The passage above warns to not to be taken captive to it especially if it takes you away from Christ. I love reading bios of people but I also have to keep in mind, they are flawed, human and sinful, just like me. God is the ultimate Philosopher, which we will see as this blog progresses.
Some of you might be wondering now, what does that have to do with Jabez & Solomon. A lot. In fact, we emphasize the prayer of Jabez over Solomon's prayer (1 Kings 4) & the prayer of Jesus (in John 17). Now I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it should give you something to think about. Let's look into the prayers of Jabez & Solomon.
Jabez was a man of God according to 1 Chronicles 4:9-10. What I found interesting through all of this was that Jabez is only mentioned in 2 verses within the entire Bible. His prayer is one of those 2 verses: Jabez called upon the God of Israel, saying, "Oh that you would bless me and enlarge my border, and that your hand might be with me, and that you would keep me from harm so that it might not bring me pain!" And God granted what he asked.
Now many of you can quote that verse back & forth and sing the song by Donald Lawrence back and forth. I have my thoughts & opinions on that, but I will say this: I'm not saying that monetary blessing should not be your desire (just don't let that be your idol), but I ask that you be careful and to not throw your fist at God because He chooses to bless you differently than you expected. Remember, His ways are not our ways; in fact, His ways are better than ours. One more thing: many people are praying for increase and are expecting God to drop it out of the sky. That creates a mentality of entitlement if not a spirit of laziness and/or complacency. Many times God is requiring us to do something in order to reap the increase, but I don't want to minimize what He can do supernaturally!
I found that my greatest blessing from God has not been monetary. My greatest blessing has been meeting people and communicating with people. Many people have blessed me in many capacities and I have been blessed to bless others in many capacities. No money in my opinion can compare to that. My prayer is probably more along the lines of Solomon.
Solomon prayed in 1 Kings 3:5-9: At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon in a dream by night, and God said, "Ask what I shall give you." And Solomon said, "You have shown great and steadfast love to your servant David my father, because he walked before you in faithfulness, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart toward you. And you have kept for him this great and steadfast love and have given him a son to sit on his throne this day. And now, O LORD my God, you have made your servant king in place of David my father, although I am but a little child. I do not know how to go out or come in. And your servant is in the midst of your people whom you have chosen, a great people, too many to be numbered or counted for multitude. Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, that I may discern between good and evil, for who is able to govern this your great people?"
And Solomon's prayer pleased The Lord (actually, Jabez's prayer pleased The Lord as well, just wanted to clarify that - smile)
Now look at what God did for Solomon (and this blessed my spirit): verses 11-14: And God said to him, "Because you have asked this, and have not asked for yourself long life or riches or the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern what is right, behold, I now do according to your word. Behold, I give you a wise and discerning mind, so that none like you has been before you and none like you shall arise after you.
Verses 13-14 are crucial: I give you also what you have not asked, both riches and honor, so that no other king shall compare with you, all your days. And if you will walk in my ways, keeping my statutes and my commandments, as your father David walked, then I will lengthen your days."
The wisdom that God gave Solomon was amazing. Sadly, Solomon ceased to use the wisdom that God gave him once you reach chapter 11. Anyway, on your own, look at verses 16-28 within chapter 3.
In chapter 4, it's recorded that Solomon spoke 3,000 proverbs, and his songs were 1,005. Many of us read Proverbs every day (a chapter per month - and I do it too). I don't know about you, but Ecclesiastes & Song of Solomon are powerful books in itself.
But I just wanted to share my thoughts on these two prayers by two powerful men of God (Jabez & Solomon).
By the way, this wasn't a planned blog :)
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
Philosophy according to the Greek dictionary means the love and pursuit of wisdom. When we think of philosophy today, it's considered the study of men and women and their ideologies. The passage above warns to not to be taken captive to it especially if it takes you away from Christ. I love reading bios of people but I also have to keep in mind, they are flawed, human and sinful, just like me. God is the ultimate Philosopher, which we will see as this blog progresses.
Some of you might be wondering now, what does that have to do with Jabez & Solomon. A lot. In fact, we emphasize the prayer of Jabez over Solomon's prayer (1 Kings 4) & the prayer of Jesus (in John 17). Now I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it should give you something to think about. Let's look into the prayers of Jabez & Solomon.
Jabez was a man of God according to 1 Chronicles 4:9-10. What I found interesting through all of this was that Jabez is only mentioned in 2 verses within the entire Bible. His prayer is one of those 2 verses: Jabez called upon the God of Israel, saying, "Oh that you would bless me and enlarge my border, and that your hand might be with me, and that you would keep me from harm so that it might not bring me pain!" And God granted what he asked.
Now many of you can quote that verse back & forth and sing the song by Donald Lawrence back and forth. I have my thoughts & opinions on that, but I will say this: I'm not saying that monetary blessing should not be your desire (just don't let that be your idol), but I ask that you be careful and to not throw your fist at God because He chooses to bless you differently than you expected. Remember, His ways are not our ways; in fact, His ways are better than ours. One more thing: many people are praying for increase and are expecting God to drop it out of the sky. That creates a mentality of entitlement if not a spirit of laziness and/or complacency. Many times God is requiring us to do something in order to reap the increase, but I don't want to minimize what He can do supernaturally!
I found that my greatest blessing from God has not been monetary. My greatest blessing has been meeting people and communicating with people. Many people have blessed me in many capacities and I have been blessed to bless others in many capacities. No money in my opinion can compare to that. My prayer is probably more along the lines of Solomon.
Solomon prayed in 1 Kings 3:5-9: At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon in a dream by night, and God said, "Ask what I shall give you." And Solomon said, "You have shown great and steadfast love to your servant David my father, because he walked before you in faithfulness, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart toward you. And you have kept for him this great and steadfast love and have given him a son to sit on his throne this day. And now, O LORD my God, you have made your servant king in place of David my father, although I am but a little child. I do not know how to go out or come in. And your servant is in the midst of your people whom you have chosen, a great people, too many to be numbered or counted for multitude. Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, that I may discern between good and evil, for who is able to govern this your great people?"
And Solomon's prayer pleased The Lord (actually, Jabez's prayer pleased The Lord as well, just wanted to clarify that - smile)
Now look at what God did for Solomon (and this blessed my spirit): verses 11-14: And God said to him, "Because you have asked this, and have not asked for yourself long life or riches or the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern what is right, behold, I now do according to your word. Behold, I give you a wise and discerning mind, so that none like you has been before you and none like you shall arise after you.
Verses 13-14 are crucial: I give you also what you have not asked, both riches and honor, so that no other king shall compare with you, all your days. And if you will walk in my ways, keeping my statutes and my commandments, as your father David walked, then I will lengthen your days."
The wisdom that God gave Solomon was amazing. Sadly, Solomon ceased to use the wisdom that God gave him once you reach chapter 11. Anyway, on your own, look at verses 16-28 within chapter 3.
In chapter 4, it's recorded that Solomon spoke 3,000 proverbs, and his songs were 1,005. Many of us read Proverbs every day (a chapter per month - and I do it too). I don't know about you, but Ecclesiastes & Song of Solomon are powerful books in itself.
But I just wanted to share my thoughts on these two prayers by two powerful men of God (Jabez & Solomon).
By the way, this wasn't a planned blog :)
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
September 3, 2014
So It's Rape Only If A Woman Remembers?
It has been brought to my attention that my fellow rape survivors have been offended. When one is offended, all are offended. So according to Cee-Lo Green, it's only rape if you remember it? Well, on behalf of us sexual abuse & rape survivors, so if we were drugged up by you and forced to have sexual intercourse with you, that's consensual? And another question (on behalf of the countless women who have been raped and ended up pregnant): do you expect a woman not to remember if she was raped when she finds out a few months from the moment you raped her that she is pregnant?
It sounds like to me that Cee-Lo Green has never met anyone who has experienced rape. Oh wait, he is the one who raped someone. And to make matters worse, he tried to define in his own way of what rape and sexual assault is. That's just as bad as having a pedophile define what is child abuse and what's not.
Now let's add insult to injury, our wonderful judicial system (controlled by the White House - yes, I said it) sentences him to three years of (get this) PROBATION after slipping a woman ecstasy without her consent in 2012. So while he was a judge in The Voice, he was raping women.
On behalf of us who have been raped (including those who were date raped) and sexually abused, what justice is there when the abuser and rapists gets a slap on the wrist and is free to walk the streets and harm more people and/or possibly kill them? I guess until it hits their home, they could care less.
Now I understand that the world loves its own, but how can we continue to put people like this on a pedestal when they're not worthy of such honor (believe me, no human is worth it). And why should a man who earnestly believes that women who have been raped (regardless of the type) will remember their assault.
Before I forget, here's the full-link to the article.
http://globalgrind.com/2014/09/02/cee...
Now let's take this rape issue further. If you're living in the U.S. and you're reading this, don't think it's not happening elsewhere. Check this out: Sharia law is creeping in and in Islam it is a woman's fault if she is raped and she can be killed. It is only the man's fault if he admits it. Now one can only wonder why so many sick men are joining Islam?
So I ask everybody around the world, who is protecting the women and the children?
My editor Shantae Charles believes that we need more men stepping to the forefront and condemning rape culture. And you know what, it's an honor to condemn the rape culture. As I am a sexual abuse survivor, I have no problems using my voice to sound the alarm about this.
In closing: I have a few parting words. First of all, Cee-Lo Green owes every woman (especially those who were date raped) an apology. There are countless women who have been raped and abused. As a result, they feel like they have no hope and some are cutting to ease the pain. Now don't be alarmed if his apology is not sincere, but if it is, glory to God.
Second of all, Cee-Lo needs to understand that the woman he raped is someone's daughter, sister, or mother. He needs to go through a class where he sits and listens to stories of women who survived their rape (even at the point of their lives threatened).
Thirdly, Cee-Lo is no different than many of the Hip Hop artists who feel that women are nothing more than objects of pleasure. They will never be able to appreciate the beauty of what God placed in front of them.
As a man, I boldly declare this: we as men are going to be held accountable for the way we treat you ladies. You are special, you are loved and you are a helpmate (and most definitely not a playmate)! A judicial system who neglects women and children will bring judgment among a city (if not a country). It's time for us ordinary people to get our heads out of the sand and raise our voices for those who are too weak to fight.
I'll stop here. Enjoy your day or evening where you are.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
It sounds like to me that Cee-Lo Green has never met anyone who has experienced rape. Oh wait, he is the one who raped someone. And to make matters worse, he tried to define in his own way of what rape and sexual assault is. That's just as bad as having a pedophile define what is child abuse and what's not.
Now let's add insult to injury, our wonderful judicial system (controlled by the White House - yes, I said it) sentences him to three years of (get this) PROBATION after slipping a woman ecstasy without her consent in 2012. So while he was a judge in The Voice, he was raping women.
On behalf of us who have been raped (including those who were date raped) and sexually abused, what justice is there when the abuser and rapists gets a slap on the wrist and is free to walk the streets and harm more people and/or possibly kill them? I guess until it hits their home, they could care less.
Now I understand that the world loves its own, but how can we continue to put people like this on a pedestal when they're not worthy of such honor (believe me, no human is worth it). And why should a man who earnestly believes that women who have been raped (regardless of the type) will remember their assault.
Before I forget, here's the full-link to the article.
http://globalgrind.com/2014/09/02/cee...
Now let's take this rape issue further. If you're living in the U.S. and you're reading this, don't think it's not happening elsewhere. Check this out: Sharia law is creeping in and in Islam it is a woman's fault if she is raped and she can be killed. It is only the man's fault if he admits it. Now one can only wonder why so many sick men are joining Islam?
So I ask everybody around the world, who is protecting the women and the children?
My editor Shantae Charles believes that we need more men stepping to the forefront and condemning rape culture. And you know what, it's an honor to condemn the rape culture. As I am a sexual abuse survivor, I have no problems using my voice to sound the alarm about this.
In closing: I have a few parting words. First of all, Cee-Lo Green owes every woman (especially those who were date raped) an apology. There are countless women who have been raped and abused. As a result, they feel like they have no hope and some are cutting to ease the pain. Now don't be alarmed if his apology is not sincere, but if it is, glory to God.
Second of all, Cee-Lo needs to understand that the woman he raped is someone's daughter, sister, or mother. He needs to go through a class where he sits and listens to stories of women who survived their rape (even at the point of their lives threatened).
Thirdly, Cee-Lo is no different than many of the Hip Hop artists who feel that women are nothing more than objects of pleasure. They will never be able to appreciate the beauty of what God placed in front of them.
As a man, I boldly declare this: we as men are going to be held accountable for the way we treat you ladies. You are special, you are loved and you are a helpmate (and most definitely not a playmate)! A judicial system who neglects women and children will bring judgment among a city (if not a country). It's time for us ordinary people to get our heads out of the sand and raise our voices for those who are too weak to fight.
I'll stop here. Enjoy your day or evening where you are.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
August 27, 2014
When People Feel They're A Burden
This post has been on my spirit ever since I did the post last month entitled How Suicides Can Be Prevented. I didn't plan to type this today, but I believe someone will receive this.
Let's defined what a burden is: a load being carried, a worrying responsibility. It also means giving a task that's difficult to deal with.
So when I think about burdens and how it rates to when people feel they're a burden, I take it to mean that there are some people who feel they are a load to other people. And this can stem from many things: abuse (physical, sexual), marital or relationship issues, illness (physical or mental), and the list can go on. Looking back at the definition of burden, I can't help but think about children who are given the task of being an adult when they're still a child.
Now many people are probably thinking about a Bible verse, particularly Matthew 11:28 that says Come into Me, you that are burdened and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Now let me give you a Scripture to think on (it's probably one you intentionally put on the shelf; Galatians 6:2. The Apostle Paul is telling us to bear one another's burdens. No one, and I mean no one, should ever feel they're a burden to anyone especially if they're going through (or are in the process of healing). Now if you're just trying to be a pest (meaning you know what to do, but you just want to bother them to make yourself feel important), that's a whole different lesson there. I want to focus this on those who are suffering (whether publicly or privately).
There are 3 things we typically do with burdens:1. We carry our burdens because we don't want to get rid of them.2. We don't want to share our burdens with others because of how people may act (more to be said on that in a moment).3. We don't want to cast our burdens over to The Lord or share with others in order to maintain some stability in our lives (because we never received security in our childhood).
When it comes to bullet point #1, this is really just a pride issue and/or wanting drama in your life. The next two bullet points is where I want to focus on.
In relation to bullet point #2, it's sad that we can't share our burdens with others (and part of it is due to fear and the feeling of being vulnerable - I get it). Yes, there are many who can't handle what another person is going through. If you run into someone who's burdened and can't handle it, could you just pray and/or intercede for them? Even if it's for 5 minutes, it's time well spent (you could actually save their life). To cast them down as a problem, they will feel they're a burden and they won't share. And then comes the infamous finger pointing. Now you could say at this point it's their fault. But I would beg to differ. Why? Because you assisted in them feeling they are a burden by you cutting them off and not listening to their heart - when really, that's what they want). James 5:16 says confess your faults to one another. If they can't confess, they can't be free. Anyway, if you can't help (or don't want to help), just pray or lead them to someone who can (and that's not a bad thing), sometimes people just need a sounding board.
In relation to bullet point #3, this is a painful one to address, but it needs to be addressed - for this is detrimental to the health of someone who is struggling with this one. Now excuse me for being a little personal as well. Many people who have been hurt (via abuse, neglect, or something else that's traumatic) will be able to identify with this. I can speak on this because I've been neglected and abused - you can view my story via the YouTube video on the right hand side of this page. Anyway, when you grow up in a home where there's no stability, a child will feel that they have no control. If it's not addressed when they become an adult, they will stomach everything and feel they're a burden (carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders). In fact, they will end up with anxiety issues? How do I know? I am in therapy for this very thing (even as I type this). Now just don't tell someone to just "stop it," or "you're in sin and the cause of all of this." Get to the core of what brought this on (not to be nosy or gossip, but seriously be able to pray for them more effectively and meet them right where they are). As I stated above, if you're not equipped to minister in this capacity (and that's ok by the way), intercede for them and direct them to someone who can. Because this particular group has gone through something traumatic, they will more & likely feel they're a burden to society anyway. Those who are in this group is a great concern to me. I can understand their need for control or some form of stability, so intense prayer and counseling (which I recommend - and not just one session) is in order.
There are many people who feel they are a burden, and it's not intentional on their part. The truth is, they want to be free: physically, mentally, spiritually & emotionally. So everything we say to them (good intended or not) matters.
Now I can't wrap up a blog post without saying something like this: if Christ is the burden lifter, and if we are to do the works of Christ, why aren't we bearing each other's burdens? My take on that question: many churches have become social clubs (or dare I say social cliques). We cast down those who are burdened and would say something like this: "they're disturbing my anointing and my chances for prosperity. They're too negative for me." Now my question would be this: "who do you talk to when you're down?" They would probably say: "I talk to Jesus." I would say, "OK, so you don't talk to any other human being?" They would say: "well yes." I would then say: "so what harm is it to help someone else be free from their chains since you're free from your chains - especially if you believe there is power in the name of Jesus - which there is by the way? And I don't mean just give them cliches which some of them aren't scriptural anyway." From there, they have to deal with God.
The main reason why this blog post was dropped in my spirit is because sadly, when people feel they're a burden, there's a strong chance that suicide is right around the corner for many. From experience, feeling that way is no fun. We don't need to make anybody feel they're a burden by our conduct. We will be held accountable by how we treat our brother and our sister (regardless of where they are in their lives).
Blessings!
The Mayne Man
Let's defined what a burden is: a load being carried, a worrying responsibility. It also means giving a task that's difficult to deal with.
So when I think about burdens and how it rates to when people feel they're a burden, I take it to mean that there are some people who feel they are a load to other people. And this can stem from many things: abuse (physical, sexual), marital or relationship issues, illness (physical or mental), and the list can go on. Looking back at the definition of burden, I can't help but think about children who are given the task of being an adult when they're still a child.
Now many people are probably thinking about a Bible verse, particularly Matthew 11:28 that says Come into Me, you that are burdened and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Now let me give you a Scripture to think on (it's probably one you intentionally put on the shelf; Galatians 6:2. The Apostle Paul is telling us to bear one another's burdens. No one, and I mean no one, should ever feel they're a burden to anyone especially if they're going through (or are in the process of healing). Now if you're just trying to be a pest (meaning you know what to do, but you just want to bother them to make yourself feel important), that's a whole different lesson there. I want to focus this on those who are suffering (whether publicly or privately).
There are 3 things we typically do with burdens:1. We carry our burdens because we don't want to get rid of them.2. We don't want to share our burdens with others because of how people may act (more to be said on that in a moment).3. We don't want to cast our burdens over to The Lord or share with others in order to maintain some stability in our lives (because we never received security in our childhood).
When it comes to bullet point #1, this is really just a pride issue and/or wanting drama in your life. The next two bullet points is where I want to focus on.
In relation to bullet point #2, it's sad that we can't share our burdens with others (and part of it is due to fear and the feeling of being vulnerable - I get it). Yes, there are many who can't handle what another person is going through. If you run into someone who's burdened and can't handle it, could you just pray and/or intercede for them? Even if it's for 5 minutes, it's time well spent (you could actually save their life). To cast them down as a problem, they will feel they're a burden and they won't share. And then comes the infamous finger pointing. Now you could say at this point it's their fault. But I would beg to differ. Why? Because you assisted in them feeling they are a burden by you cutting them off and not listening to their heart - when really, that's what they want). James 5:16 says confess your faults to one another. If they can't confess, they can't be free. Anyway, if you can't help (or don't want to help), just pray or lead them to someone who can (and that's not a bad thing), sometimes people just need a sounding board.
In relation to bullet point #3, this is a painful one to address, but it needs to be addressed - for this is detrimental to the health of someone who is struggling with this one. Now excuse me for being a little personal as well. Many people who have been hurt (via abuse, neglect, or something else that's traumatic) will be able to identify with this. I can speak on this because I've been neglected and abused - you can view my story via the YouTube video on the right hand side of this page. Anyway, when you grow up in a home where there's no stability, a child will feel that they have no control. If it's not addressed when they become an adult, they will stomach everything and feel they're a burden (carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders). In fact, they will end up with anxiety issues? How do I know? I am in therapy for this very thing (even as I type this). Now just don't tell someone to just "stop it," or "you're in sin and the cause of all of this." Get to the core of what brought this on (not to be nosy or gossip, but seriously be able to pray for them more effectively and meet them right where they are). As I stated above, if you're not equipped to minister in this capacity (and that's ok by the way), intercede for them and direct them to someone who can. Because this particular group has gone through something traumatic, they will more & likely feel they're a burden to society anyway. Those who are in this group is a great concern to me. I can understand their need for control or some form of stability, so intense prayer and counseling (which I recommend - and not just one session) is in order.
There are many people who feel they are a burden, and it's not intentional on their part. The truth is, they want to be free: physically, mentally, spiritually & emotionally. So everything we say to them (good intended or not) matters.
Now I can't wrap up a blog post without saying something like this: if Christ is the burden lifter, and if we are to do the works of Christ, why aren't we bearing each other's burdens? My take on that question: many churches have become social clubs (or dare I say social cliques). We cast down those who are burdened and would say something like this: "they're disturbing my anointing and my chances for prosperity. They're too negative for me." Now my question would be this: "who do you talk to when you're down?" They would probably say: "I talk to Jesus." I would say, "OK, so you don't talk to any other human being?" They would say: "well yes." I would then say: "so what harm is it to help someone else be free from their chains since you're free from your chains - especially if you believe there is power in the name of Jesus - which there is by the way? And I don't mean just give them cliches which some of them aren't scriptural anyway." From there, they have to deal with God.
The main reason why this blog post was dropped in my spirit is because sadly, when people feel they're a burden, there's a strong chance that suicide is right around the corner for many. From experience, feeling that way is no fun. We don't need to make anybody feel they're a burden by our conduct. We will be held accountable by how we treat our brother and our sister (regardless of where they are in their lives).
Blessings!
The Mayne Man
August 26, 2014
Relationship 101 (A Woman's Response)
Earlier today, I posted the 3rd Revelation of Relationship 101. Now as I promised, here's a response from a woman's perspective to the same 3 questions.
I asked Pastor Shantae Charles & Evangelist Marva Johnson to weigh in on these questions. So, without further delay, let's get into it.
Question 1:In the realm of relationships (marriage), would you say that for a man, a protector is who he is or are there things he can learn to be better equipped as a protector of his wife and kids?
Pastor Charles: There are always things a man can learn to be a better protector. Practically, he can receive mentorship or take classes in his weak areas. Spiritually, he can read the Word of God which is laced with much wisdom throughout in nearly every area of life.
Evangelist Johnson: The way that God created men, that's one of Adam'a responsibilities. At the same time, a woman has to know God first as her husband. It's important that a woman knows that it's God first, especially if a woman has been in a toxic relationship (abuse, abandonment, etc.). Those relationships leave holes in a woman an if she doesn't know God as a protector first, she will put undue pressure on the next man to ensure what happened before doesn't happen again. A man is supposed to protect and provide, but there's a lot that a woman needs to be and to do for a relationship to be balanced.
Question 2: There are some men who can claim to be protectors, but are impostors. What can women do in this case?
Pastor Charles: Women can pray and seek God first of all. They can ask for God's discernment to expose impostors. They can also introduce the person of interest to men they trust who can give an honest assessment of the person. A man's night out with some of your male friends can expose what he may keep hidden from your view as woman (like a wandering eye, for instance).
Evangelist Johnson: Sadly, this is a time where the very elect will be deceived (in fact, Jesus said if it were possible, even the very elect will be deceived). There are many impostors, predators, vampires & pimps in the church.
If a woman is in the Word and spending time with God, she can protect herself. The only way a woman can be deceived is if she wants to be deceived. The Holy Spirit sends flags (and examples in the Word). Adam didn't have to eat that fruit, he CHOSE to. The same holds true for women (and men too). Women need to go slow and not get caught up in emotions. Slow & steady wins the race. If you're caught up in emotions, you'll miss the signs (and the devil will come as an angel of light). Look at relationships like layers. You have to peel and peel till you get to the core. In fact, the further you peel, the more it burns your eyes. Chef's will tell you to put an onion in the freezer for 15 minutes. If a woman keeps herself cool (and under control), you can read the signs. In fact, 6-9 months you'll start to see who he is. If a woman is connected to God, impostors will eventually be exposed.
Question 3: There may be men who may feel like they are not prepared (or they are but the enemy is attempting with every fiber to get in his mind to say "you're not prepared, she can see through you, or you're trying to win her over)," what can the men & women do?
Pastor Charles: There is a level of preparation that has to occur, but I also see preparation used as a stall method for being indecisive. If you are not ready, get ready. If you are not ready, give yourself a time frame that you will seek to be in preparation mode (6 months to a year), focusing on things you see that may need to change in you. Don't let it be an open-ended phrase, because you will not prepare.
Evangelist Johnson: Prayer and fasting is it right there. When you can't do it, God can. He will give you insight on what to do and not to do. The key is to stay open before The Lord for that's going to help protect your wife and kids. Know what your call is and what battles you have to fight. Once you get out of the emotional realm, it's easier to get into the spiritual realm for that person God called you to. Men need to govern themselves according to Scripture. A man needs to lead himself before he can lead his family. There is a difference between single and being married. When he gets married, things will shift because your wife and kids now is your ministry; but he must maintain his relationship with The Lord. When he's single, he could just focus on The Lord, marriage requires a shift. One more thing a man needs to do is to cast down every thought that comes against God and against your mate. A book I recommend is by John Eckhardt entitled Prayers That Rout Demons.
I pray this has blessed someone.
As you have read both of their responses, don't be surprised if you see Shantae's responses again in Volume 2 of Robert & Shantae's marriage series. If you want to get volume 1, here's the link (and it's only available as an e-book). http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00IH5H...
In closing, Shantae did a lesson on Broken Ribs. I encourage you all to check this out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOEUy...
I asked Pastor Shantae Charles & Evangelist Marva Johnson to weigh in on these questions. So, without further delay, let's get into it.
Question 1:In the realm of relationships (marriage), would you say that for a man, a protector is who he is or are there things he can learn to be better equipped as a protector of his wife and kids?
Pastor Charles: There are always things a man can learn to be a better protector. Practically, he can receive mentorship or take classes in his weak areas. Spiritually, he can read the Word of God which is laced with much wisdom throughout in nearly every area of life.
Evangelist Johnson: The way that God created men, that's one of Adam'a responsibilities. At the same time, a woman has to know God first as her husband. It's important that a woman knows that it's God first, especially if a woman has been in a toxic relationship (abuse, abandonment, etc.). Those relationships leave holes in a woman an if she doesn't know God as a protector first, she will put undue pressure on the next man to ensure what happened before doesn't happen again. A man is supposed to protect and provide, but there's a lot that a woman needs to be and to do for a relationship to be balanced.
Question 2: There are some men who can claim to be protectors, but are impostors. What can women do in this case?
Pastor Charles: Women can pray and seek God first of all. They can ask for God's discernment to expose impostors. They can also introduce the person of interest to men they trust who can give an honest assessment of the person. A man's night out with some of your male friends can expose what he may keep hidden from your view as woman (like a wandering eye, for instance).
Evangelist Johnson: Sadly, this is a time where the very elect will be deceived (in fact, Jesus said if it were possible, even the very elect will be deceived). There are many impostors, predators, vampires & pimps in the church.
If a woman is in the Word and spending time with God, she can protect herself. The only way a woman can be deceived is if she wants to be deceived. The Holy Spirit sends flags (and examples in the Word). Adam didn't have to eat that fruit, he CHOSE to. The same holds true for women (and men too). Women need to go slow and not get caught up in emotions. Slow & steady wins the race. If you're caught up in emotions, you'll miss the signs (and the devil will come as an angel of light). Look at relationships like layers. You have to peel and peel till you get to the core. In fact, the further you peel, the more it burns your eyes. Chef's will tell you to put an onion in the freezer for 15 minutes. If a woman keeps herself cool (and under control), you can read the signs. In fact, 6-9 months you'll start to see who he is. If a woman is connected to God, impostors will eventually be exposed.
Question 3: There may be men who may feel like they are not prepared (or they are but the enemy is attempting with every fiber to get in his mind to say "you're not prepared, she can see through you, or you're trying to win her over)," what can the men & women do?
Pastor Charles: There is a level of preparation that has to occur, but I also see preparation used as a stall method for being indecisive. If you are not ready, get ready. If you are not ready, give yourself a time frame that you will seek to be in preparation mode (6 months to a year), focusing on things you see that may need to change in you. Don't let it be an open-ended phrase, because you will not prepare.
Evangelist Johnson: Prayer and fasting is it right there. When you can't do it, God can. He will give you insight on what to do and not to do. The key is to stay open before The Lord for that's going to help protect your wife and kids. Know what your call is and what battles you have to fight. Once you get out of the emotional realm, it's easier to get into the spiritual realm for that person God called you to. Men need to govern themselves according to Scripture. A man needs to lead himself before he can lead his family. There is a difference between single and being married. When he gets married, things will shift because your wife and kids now is your ministry; but he must maintain his relationship with The Lord. When he's single, he could just focus on The Lord, marriage requires a shift. One more thing a man needs to do is to cast down every thought that comes against God and against your mate. A book I recommend is by John Eckhardt entitled Prayers That Rout Demons.
I pray this has blessed someone.
As you have read both of their responses, don't be surprised if you see Shantae's responses again in Volume 2 of Robert & Shantae's marriage series. If you want to get volume 1, here's the link (and it's only available as an e-book). http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00IH5H...
In closing, Shantae did a lesson on Broken Ribs. I encourage you all to check this out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOEUy...
Relationship 101 (Third Revelation)
This post was birthed out of a conversation with a friend of mine and we were discussing about the role of a husband. Three questions came out and I asked a dear brother (and a minister of the Gospel) to shed light on this. Hope you enjoy (and yes. It's unedited just for you).
Question 1: Is a husband a protector by design or is it something he learns? A protector is who he is, it's not something you pick up along the way. Genesis 2, Adam was to guard & keep the garden. That is a man's role as husband & father. Anything that enters the home needs to go through the head. The Bible made it clear when the serpent was talking to Eve. If you look at the Scriptures closely, you'll find that Adam was with her and he didn't protect her. If you look even closer, Eve was deceived, but not Adam. Their eyes weren't opened until Adam ate. Sin occurred when Adam ate. The responsibility is on the man because he's the head. Ephesians 5:21-33 is very clear about the role of the husband (and wife).
If men aren't ready for that kind of a role (considering that's a responsibility), they should not get married because the Bible likens marriage of a husband and wife as to Christ and the church.
I feel led to just flow off of what my brother said: a lot of men get married without understanding what it all entails (that's what I see as a hubby-in-training). Can the husbands (and wives) agree on that marriage is work just like our salvation is work? And it requires a deep commitment. I'm about to flow for real: a husband should be able to pray and cover his wife when she's hurting - that's what Christ does for us when we're hurting! Wives get beat up by society and the devil and we men need to pray and protect them with no ulterior motive. Christ knows that His bride gets attacked daily, and He's praying and interceding for us daily. Ok. I'll stop :)
Prelude to Question 2: How do we address men who step into the role of husband but have no clue about protecting their wife and kids? First, the Bible says that my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Sadly, a lot of men spend more time studying the car they intend to purchase than they do the marriage they intend to enter.
Question 2: What can women do to protect themselves from impostors (knowing they are the weaker vessel)? In a normal marriage, the father gives the daughter to her now husband. A woman should stay under some kind of authority. It could be a father or pastor (that can speak into her life and give godly counsel), but the wife has to be under the covering of her husband.
For the single ladies: A single woman needs a covering by a father figure or pastor to be protected from impostors.
Now when speaking about "weaker vessel," we're talking physically and not intellectually. God's order is that the man be the covering and protection for the wife. If she's not getting the counsel from a pastor, it's like a woman trying to raise a boy to be a man (it's not impossible, but there are some things she can't teach him). She needs that pastor or her father for guidance because he can give honest counsel (and not the man she loves because she's enamored).
Question 3: How should a man who's ready to enter a covenant marriage deal with the devil's darts of doubt?
First, we men must have viable standards or concrete criteria that aligns itself with Scripture. Why? Because we're never going to be 100% and everything requires a measure of faith to it.Go through a scriptural checklist: 1. Do I love this woman? 2. Am I prepared to die for her? 3. Am I prepared to commit myself to her?4. Am I willing to forsake all of my lady friends for her?5. If I marry her, am I capable of taking care of her?
Flowing off of my brother for a moment: if he can unequivocally say yes to the above questions, then he's ready. Christ being the groom is committed to His bride. You see, the devil is only committed to self and manipulation. If we men are to be like Christ, we need to step our game up. We need to take the role of protecting seriously because marriages are a representation of Christ and His church. Just like women who are being deceived by fake men perpetrating to be grooms, the bride of Christ needs to be careful and not follow after a false Christ!
And let me add two additional questions to that checklist:6. Am I praying for her with no ulterior motive? 7. Will I continue to pray for her even if God has not joined us together?
Ok. Back to what my brother was saying :)
After we pray, there has to be a peace in our heart - and this crucial: differentiate between your head and heart because your head is going to question why the T's aren't crossed and the I's aren't dotted.
We men must ask this one question: when I think about marriage with her, deep down inside, what's happening? Is there peace in my heart and my spirit?
Like Joshua said, why be halted between two opinions? If you're still deciding between other women, you're not ready! If your heart says yes, then check your head and trust God. Do your due diligence (reference the spiritual checklist above).
In regards to this question within the checklist: If I marry her, am I capable of taking care of her? I also need to ask if I'm in position. Now, there's still going to be some uncertainty and it will require faith. The Bible says whatsoever is not of faith is sin.
Some time this week, I will share responses to those questions from two powerful Sisters in Christ. They are Pastor Shantae Charles & Evangelist Marva Johnson. It will be entitled Relationship 101 (A Woman's Response).
Question 1: Is a husband a protector by design or is it something he learns? A protector is who he is, it's not something you pick up along the way. Genesis 2, Adam was to guard & keep the garden. That is a man's role as husband & father. Anything that enters the home needs to go through the head. The Bible made it clear when the serpent was talking to Eve. If you look at the Scriptures closely, you'll find that Adam was with her and he didn't protect her. If you look even closer, Eve was deceived, but not Adam. Their eyes weren't opened until Adam ate. Sin occurred when Adam ate. The responsibility is on the man because he's the head. Ephesians 5:21-33 is very clear about the role of the husband (and wife).
If men aren't ready for that kind of a role (considering that's a responsibility), they should not get married because the Bible likens marriage of a husband and wife as to Christ and the church.
I feel led to just flow off of what my brother said: a lot of men get married without understanding what it all entails (that's what I see as a hubby-in-training). Can the husbands (and wives) agree on that marriage is work just like our salvation is work? And it requires a deep commitment. I'm about to flow for real: a husband should be able to pray and cover his wife when she's hurting - that's what Christ does for us when we're hurting! Wives get beat up by society and the devil and we men need to pray and protect them with no ulterior motive. Christ knows that His bride gets attacked daily, and He's praying and interceding for us daily. Ok. I'll stop :)
Prelude to Question 2: How do we address men who step into the role of husband but have no clue about protecting their wife and kids? First, the Bible says that my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Sadly, a lot of men spend more time studying the car they intend to purchase than they do the marriage they intend to enter.
Question 2: What can women do to protect themselves from impostors (knowing they are the weaker vessel)? In a normal marriage, the father gives the daughter to her now husband. A woman should stay under some kind of authority. It could be a father or pastor (that can speak into her life and give godly counsel), but the wife has to be under the covering of her husband.
For the single ladies: A single woman needs a covering by a father figure or pastor to be protected from impostors.
Now when speaking about "weaker vessel," we're talking physically and not intellectually. God's order is that the man be the covering and protection for the wife. If she's not getting the counsel from a pastor, it's like a woman trying to raise a boy to be a man (it's not impossible, but there are some things she can't teach him). She needs that pastor or her father for guidance because he can give honest counsel (and not the man she loves because she's enamored).
Question 3: How should a man who's ready to enter a covenant marriage deal with the devil's darts of doubt?
First, we men must have viable standards or concrete criteria that aligns itself with Scripture. Why? Because we're never going to be 100% and everything requires a measure of faith to it.Go through a scriptural checklist: 1. Do I love this woman? 2. Am I prepared to die for her? 3. Am I prepared to commit myself to her?4. Am I willing to forsake all of my lady friends for her?5. If I marry her, am I capable of taking care of her?
Flowing off of my brother for a moment: if he can unequivocally say yes to the above questions, then he's ready. Christ being the groom is committed to His bride. You see, the devil is only committed to self and manipulation. If we men are to be like Christ, we need to step our game up. We need to take the role of protecting seriously because marriages are a representation of Christ and His church. Just like women who are being deceived by fake men perpetrating to be grooms, the bride of Christ needs to be careful and not follow after a false Christ!
And let me add two additional questions to that checklist:6. Am I praying for her with no ulterior motive? 7. Will I continue to pray for her even if God has not joined us together?
Ok. Back to what my brother was saying :)
After we pray, there has to be a peace in our heart - and this crucial: differentiate between your head and heart because your head is going to question why the T's aren't crossed and the I's aren't dotted.
We men must ask this one question: when I think about marriage with her, deep down inside, what's happening? Is there peace in my heart and my spirit?
Like Joshua said, why be halted between two opinions? If you're still deciding between other women, you're not ready! If your heart says yes, then check your head and trust God. Do your due diligence (reference the spiritual checklist above).
In regards to this question within the checklist: If I marry her, am I capable of taking care of her? I also need to ask if I'm in position. Now, there's still going to be some uncertainty and it will require faith. The Bible says whatsoever is not of faith is sin.
Some time this week, I will share responses to those questions from two powerful Sisters in Christ. They are Pastor Shantae Charles & Evangelist Marva Johnson. It will be entitled Relationship 101 (A Woman's Response).
August 18, 2014
Is Something Wrong (Or Am I Just Losing It? (Round 2)
Are you finding that many employees are working long hours with little pay while the money we pay out in taxes goes to Washington and they take long vacations with that money?
Do you suppose that if any of us became President that we could actually take up golf? :)
Are you noticing more people are without jobs while the politicians are partying like it's 1999 with Jay-Z & Beyonce?
Are you noticing also that corrupt politicians are spying on it's own citizens and on political opponents?
Do you agree that if innocent people are being murdered like sheep, that we either kill the wolf or watch the sheep die?
Is something wrong when political leaders take expensive vacations at the expense of taxpayers (who can't even afford a ticket to the ballet due to a horrific economy)?
And why do people work so hard to get a job when they don't even want to do the job?
Ok. I'll leave you all alone for now :)
The Mayne Man
Do you suppose that if any of us became President that we could actually take up golf? :)
Are you noticing more people are without jobs while the politicians are partying like it's 1999 with Jay-Z & Beyonce?
Are you noticing also that corrupt politicians are spying on it's own citizens and on political opponents?
Do you agree that if innocent people are being murdered like sheep, that we either kill the wolf or watch the sheep die?
Is something wrong when political leaders take expensive vacations at the expense of taxpayers (who can't even afford a ticket to the ballet due to a horrific economy)?
And why do people work so hard to get a job when they don't even want to do the job?
Ok. I'll leave you all alone for now :)
The Mayne Man
Relationship 101 (Second Revelation)
Back in March of 2014, I did a series on my blog called Relationship 101 (if you missed it, here's the link). http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/03/relationship-101-unedited.html?m=1
Between April & May of 2014, I posted the second revelation on FB. So, here it is, compiled & unedited.
This revelation focuses on PFTT in relationships. It's about patience, it's about faith, it's about trust (some of you are thinking about Sade's Nothing Can Come Between Us now - smile) and it's about time.
All four of those are critical in a relationship. Both a man and a woman (especially if they love each other) must allow those 4 things to grow and mature until they can come to a place where a man can say to his wife, I have full confidence in you (and vice versa).
If the issues of the past have not been resolved & brought out in the open, there will be a weight. The test of how strong a couple really is, is how they handle the circumstances in life and in each other.
Hebrews 12:1 says to lay aside every weight. Unresolved past issues or past relationships are weights that must be addressed so you can walk in liberty. Where the spirit of The Lord is, there is liberty. Another indicator of a weight is when an issue occurs (in or out of a relationship) and your heart rate goes up. Address that before the situation weighs you down. When the weights are laid aside and you’re at liberty, you still have to trust God.
Most of the time we know when something within us is hindering us; we should never override it or ignore it. It must be dealt with in order to receive God's best in your life & relationship.
There will be times where we will have to ask ourselves, "how comfortable am I in my own skin with my past and can I view my past as being in the past and not bring it into my present or my future?"
What are reasons past issues/past relationships may come up in your life? Here’s one thought:We haven’t sufficiently dealt with it, put it away, slayed that giant as it were.
Patience is good in a relationships, but the key in relationships is to move past the past to be able to give yourself totally and unhindered - and that requires faith.
Communication is vital in a relationship - both parties need to be honest and transparent with each other. Questions such as this need to come out, "how would you feel if this were to happen?"
Sometimes it’s real easy to give a theoretical answer to a question when the real response should be “I don’t know how I’ll react to this situation if it comes up.” The reason is because the situation is not there yet, and/or you’re not husband & wife yet.
Never be pressured (or move too quickly) into a relationship because of XYZ & neither party should pressure each other as well. An Ishmael can be created as a result - the focus here is patience, faith, trust & God’s timing when a man & woman join together (or when a married couple gives birth to a child).
The Bible says in your patience you possess your soul (Luke 21:19). If two people know they're to be together, time is not to be the driver of what they do. Yes, time is to be enjoyed and time is important, but it's not to be behind the wheel of their lives.
Our timetable will always take us sooner than we should go, it can make us pay more than we thought we would pay and we will not be ready to deal with what we face at our destination.
In the fullness of time God sent His Son (Galatians 4:4). Just like Jesus, who was sent in the fullness of time, relationships are like fruit and must be plucked in the fullness of time. Sure, we can pluck fruit at anytime, but when it’s plucked at the right time, it tastes best and it’s most delicious.
Relationships should never be rushed because of our timetable. Ecclesiastes 3 says to everything there is a season, and a time to every matter under heaven.
Discerning of the time is very important. Gehazi made a mistake in not discerning the time (2 Kings 5:15-27). Don’t allow time to discern you and put pressure on you. In your patience you possess your soul.
In a relationship, there’s never 100% surety. If we wait till everything is perfect, that time will never seem to come.
Do you believe this scripture to also apply in relationships (from Ecclesiastes 11:4): He who observes the wind [and waits for all conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap?
The bigger the endeavor, whether it be marriage or another endeavor that’s big, requires a great degree of faith.
Many times in relationships, people wait till the T's are crossed and the I's are dotted, but Proverbs 14:12 says There is a way which seems right to a man and appears straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death.
A man is supposed to take care of his family, but at the same time he must have faith that God will provide (if he knows he’s not where he wants to be financially), discern the time to commit to the relationship or jump the broom, and know that God is a progressive God. #PreachingToMe :)
In a relationship, both parties should not seek to go to third base or home plate without having gone through first or second plate.
Relationships typically fail because people look at it naturally when God looks at it spiritually.
Do you believe that some (if not all) relationships require the same amount of faith & trust in God that Abraham had when he was told to leave his country and go wherever God led him?
And in closing: If a man has found a woman who he believes is the one, he must pray, discern the time, be patient and know that every step he takes from that point forward is a step of faith.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
Between April & May of 2014, I posted the second revelation on FB. So, here it is, compiled & unedited.
This revelation focuses on PFTT in relationships. It's about patience, it's about faith, it's about trust (some of you are thinking about Sade's Nothing Can Come Between Us now - smile) and it's about time.
All four of those are critical in a relationship. Both a man and a woman (especially if they love each other) must allow those 4 things to grow and mature until they can come to a place where a man can say to his wife, I have full confidence in you (and vice versa).
If the issues of the past have not been resolved & brought out in the open, there will be a weight. The test of how strong a couple really is, is how they handle the circumstances in life and in each other.
Hebrews 12:1 says to lay aside every weight. Unresolved past issues or past relationships are weights that must be addressed so you can walk in liberty. Where the spirit of The Lord is, there is liberty. Another indicator of a weight is when an issue occurs (in or out of a relationship) and your heart rate goes up. Address that before the situation weighs you down. When the weights are laid aside and you’re at liberty, you still have to trust God.
Most of the time we know when something within us is hindering us; we should never override it or ignore it. It must be dealt with in order to receive God's best in your life & relationship.
There will be times where we will have to ask ourselves, "how comfortable am I in my own skin with my past and can I view my past as being in the past and not bring it into my present or my future?"
What are reasons past issues/past relationships may come up in your life? Here’s one thought:We haven’t sufficiently dealt with it, put it away, slayed that giant as it were.
Patience is good in a relationships, but the key in relationships is to move past the past to be able to give yourself totally and unhindered - and that requires faith.
Communication is vital in a relationship - both parties need to be honest and transparent with each other. Questions such as this need to come out, "how would you feel if this were to happen?"
Sometimes it’s real easy to give a theoretical answer to a question when the real response should be “I don’t know how I’ll react to this situation if it comes up.” The reason is because the situation is not there yet, and/or you’re not husband & wife yet.
Never be pressured (or move too quickly) into a relationship because of XYZ & neither party should pressure each other as well. An Ishmael can be created as a result - the focus here is patience, faith, trust & God’s timing when a man & woman join together (or when a married couple gives birth to a child).
The Bible says in your patience you possess your soul (Luke 21:19). If two people know they're to be together, time is not to be the driver of what they do. Yes, time is to be enjoyed and time is important, but it's not to be behind the wheel of their lives.
Our timetable will always take us sooner than we should go, it can make us pay more than we thought we would pay and we will not be ready to deal with what we face at our destination.
In the fullness of time God sent His Son (Galatians 4:4). Just like Jesus, who was sent in the fullness of time, relationships are like fruit and must be plucked in the fullness of time. Sure, we can pluck fruit at anytime, but when it’s plucked at the right time, it tastes best and it’s most delicious.
Relationships should never be rushed because of our timetable. Ecclesiastes 3 says to everything there is a season, and a time to every matter under heaven.
Discerning of the time is very important. Gehazi made a mistake in not discerning the time (2 Kings 5:15-27). Don’t allow time to discern you and put pressure on you. In your patience you possess your soul.
In a relationship, there’s never 100% surety. If we wait till everything is perfect, that time will never seem to come.
Do you believe this scripture to also apply in relationships (from Ecclesiastes 11:4): He who observes the wind [and waits for all conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap?
The bigger the endeavor, whether it be marriage or another endeavor that’s big, requires a great degree of faith.
Many times in relationships, people wait till the T's are crossed and the I's are dotted, but Proverbs 14:12 says There is a way which seems right to a man and appears straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death.
A man is supposed to take care of his family, but at the same time he must have faith that God will provide (if he knows he’s not where he wants to be financially), discern the time to commit to the relationship or jump the broom, and know that God is a progressive God. #PreachingToMe :)
In a relationship, both parties should not seek to go to third base or home plate without having gone through first or second plate.
Relationships typically fail because people look at it naturally when God looks at it spiritually.
Do you believe that some (if not all) relationships require the same amount of faith & trust in God that Abraham had when he was told to leave his country and go wherever God led him?
And in closing: If a man has found a woman who he believes is the one, he must pray, discern the time, be patient and know that every step he takes from that point forward is a step of faith.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
Relationship 101 (2nd Revelation)
Back in March of 2014, I did a series on my blog called Relationship 101 (if you missed it, here's the link). http://mayneman.blogspot.com/2014/03/...
Between April & May of 2014, I posted the second revelation on FB. So, here it is, compiled & unedited.
This revelation focuses on PFTT in relationships. It's about patience, it's about faith, it's about trust (some of you are thinking about Sade's Nothing Can Come Between Us now - smile) and it's about time.
All four of those are critical in a relationship. Both a man and a woman (especially if they love each other) must allow those 4 things to grow and mature until they can come to a place where a man can say to his wife, I have full confidence in you (and vice versa).
If the issues of the past have not been resolved & brought out in the open, there will be a weight. The test of how strong a couple really is, is how they handle the circumstances in life and in each other.
Hebrews 12:1 says to lay aside every weight. Unresolved past issues or past relationships are weights that must be addressed so you can walk in liberty. Where the spirit of The Lord is, there is liberty. Another indicator of a weight is when an issue occurs (in or out of a relationship) and your heart rate goes up. Address that before the situation weighs you down. When the weights are laid aside and you’re at liberty, you still have to trust God.
Most of the time we know when something within us is hindering us; we should never override it or ignore it. It must be dealt with in order to receive God's best in your life & relationship.
There will be times where we will have to ask ourselves, "how comfortable am I in my own skin with my past and can I view my past as being in the past and not bring it into my present or my future?"
What are reasons past issues/past relationships may come up in your life? Here’s one thought:We haven’t sufficiently dealt with it, put it away, slayed that giant as it were.
Patience is good in a relationships, but the key in relationships is to move past the past to be able to give yourself totally and unhindered - and that requires faith.
Communication is vital in a relationship - both parties need to be honest and transparent with each other. Questions such as this need to come out, "how would you feel if this were to happen?"
Sometimes it’s real easy to give a theoretical answer to a question when the real response should be “I don’t know how I’ll react to this situation if it comes up.” The reason is because the situation is not there yet, and/or you’re not husband & wife yet.
Never be pressured (or move too quickly) into a relationship because of XYZ & neither party should pressure each other as well. An Ishmael can be created as a result - the focus here is patience, faith, trust & God’s timing when a man & woman join together (or when a married couple gives birth to a child).
The Bible says in your patience you possess your soul (Luke 21:19). If two people know they're to be together, time is not to be the driver of what they do. Yes, time is to be enjoyed and time is important, but it's not to be behind the wheel of their lives.
Our timetable will always take us sooner than we should go, it can make us pay more than we thought we would pay and we will not be ready to deal with what we face at our destination.
In the fullness of time God sent His Son (Galatians 4:4). Just like Jesus, who was sent in the fullness of time, relationships are like fruit and must be plucked in the fullness of time. Sure, we can pluck fruit at anytime, but when it’s plucked at the right time, it tastes best and it’s most delicious.
Relationships should never be rushed because of our timetable. Ecclesiastes 3 says to everything there is a season, and a time to every matter under heaven.
Discerning of the time is very important. Gehazi made a mistake in not discerning the time (2 Kings 5:15-27). Don’t allow time to discern you and put pressure on you. In your patience you possess your soul.
In a relationship, there’s never 100% surety. If we wait till everything is perfect, that time will never seem to come.
Do you believe this scripture to also apply in relationships (from Ecclesiastes 11:4): He who observes the wind [and waits for all conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap?
The bigger the endeavor, whether it be marriage or another endeavor that’s big, requires a great degree of faith.
Many times in relationships, people wait till the T's are crossed and the I's are dotted, but Proverbs 14:12 says There is a way which seems right to a man and appears straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death.
A man is supposed to take care of his family, but at the same time he must have faith that God will provide (if he knows he’s not where he wants to be financially), discern the time to commit to the relationship or jump the broom, and know that God is a progressive God. #PreachingToMe :)
In a relationship, both parties should not seek to go to third base or home plate without having gone through first or second plate.
Relationships typically fail because people look at it naturally when God looks at it spiritually.
Do you believe that some (if not all) relationships require the same amount of faith & trust in God that Abraham had when he was told to leave his country and go wherever God led him?
And in closing: If a man has found a woman who he believes is the one, he must pray, discern the time, be patient and know that every step he takes from that point forward is a step of faith.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
Between April & May of 2014, I posted the second revelation on FB. So, here it is, compiled & unedited.
This revelation focuses on PFTT in relationships. It's about patience, it's about faith, it's about trust (some of you are thinking about Sade's Nothing Can Come Between Us now - smile) and it's about time.
All four of those are critical in a relationship. Both a man and a woman (especially if they love each other) must allow those 4 things to grow and mature until they can come to a place where a man can say to his wife, I have full confidence in you (and vice versa).
If the issues of the past have not been resolved & brought out in the open, there will be a weight. The test of how strong a couple really is, is how they handle the circumstances in life and in each other.
Hebrews 12:1 says to lay aside every weight. Unresolved past issues or past relationships are weights that must be addressed so you can walk in liberty. Where the spirit of The Lord is, there is liberty. Another indicator of a weight is when an issue occurs (in or out of a relationship) and your heart rate goes up. Address that before the situation weighs you down. When the weights are laid aside and you’re at liberty, you still have to trust God.
Most of the time we know when something within us is hindering us; we should never override it or ignore it. It must be dealt with in order to receive God's best in your life & relationship.
There will be times where we will have to ask ourselves, "how comfortable am I in my own skin with my past and can I view my past as being in the past and not bring it into my present or my future?"
What are reasons past issues/past relationships may come up in your life? Here’s one thought:We haven’t sufficiently dealt with it, put it away, slayed that giant as it were.
Patience is good in a relationships, but the key in relationships is to move past the past to be able to give yourself totally and unhindered - and that requires faith.
Communication is vital in a relationship - both parties need to be honest and transparent with each other. Questions such as this need to come out, "how would you feel if this were to happen?"
Sometimes it’s real easy to give a theoretical answer to a question when the real response should be “I don’t know how I’ll react to this situation if it comes up.” The reason is because the situation is not there yet, and/or you’re not husband & wife yet.
Never be pressured (or move too quickly) into a relationship because of XYZ & neither party should pressure each other as well. An Ishmael can be created as a result - the focus here is patience, faith, trust & God’s timing when a man & woman join together (or when a married couple gives birth to a child).
The Bible says in your patience you possess your soul (Luke 21:19). If two people know they're to be together, time is not to be the driver of what they do. Yes, time is to be enjoyed and time is important, but it's not to be behind the wheel of their lives.
Our timetable will always take us sooner than we should go, it can make us pay more than we thought we would pay and we will not be ready to deal with what we face at our destination.
In the fullness of time God sent His Son (Galatians 4:4). Just like Jesus, who was sent in the fullness of time, relationships are like fruit and must be plucked in the fullness of time. Sure, we can pluck fruit at anytime, but when it’s plucked at the right time, it tastes best and it’s most delicious.
Relationships should never be rushed because of our timetable. Ecclesiastes 3 says to everything there is a season, and a time to every matter under heaven.
Discerning of the time is very important. Gehazi made a mistake in not discerning the time (2 Kings 5:15-27). Don’t allow time to discern you and put pressure on you. In your patience you possess your soul.
In a relationship, there’s never 100% surety. If we wait till everything is perfect, that time will never seem to come.
Do you believe this scripture to also apply in relationships (from Ecclesiastes 11:4): He who observes the wind [and waits for all conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap?
The bigger the endeavor, whether it be marriage or another endeavor that’s big, requires a great degree of faith.
Many times in relationships, people wait till the T's are crossed and the I's are dotted, but Proverbs 14:12 says There is a way which seems right to a man and appears straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death.
A man is supposed to take care of his family, but at the same time he must have faith that God will provide (if he knows he’s not where he wants to be financially), discern the time to commit to the relationship or jump the broom, and know that God is a progressive God. #PreachingToMe :)
In a relationship, both parties should not seek to go to third base or home plate without having gone through first or second plate.
Relationships typically fail because people look at it naturally when God looks at it spiritually.
Do you believe that some (if not all) relationships require the same amount of faith & trust in God that Abraham had when he was told to leave his country and go wherever God led him?
And in closing: If a man has found a woman who he believes is the one, he must pray, discern the time, be patient and know that every step he takes from that point forward is a step of faith.
Blessings:
The Mayne Man
