Kay Wall's Blog, page 5

Golf Photos

It seems that no matter what golf tournament organisers do, they will never stop fans from taking photos of the pros while they're mid-swing. It's even more of a problem now that just about everyone has a phone which doubles as a camera.
If they're photographing Kevin Na, this isn't a problem, as his mid-swing lasts a long time. They'll have ample time to get an action shot without disrupting his final pass at the ball.
However, if it's Phil Mickelson, they'll need to come up with some sort of subterfuge to get away with it.
I have the perfect answer and am waiting to hear back from the top-selling cell phone manufacturer who, I'm sure, will want to patent my idea. However, as I know my readers can keep a secret, I'll let you in on it.
I have recorded 567 different bird calls from all over the world. When a fan wants to take a picture of a pro, he selects a bird from the local area. When he takes his photo, instead of a 'click', everyone around will hear a bird call.
If only this had been available when Steve Williams used to caddy for Tiger.

Vasodilation and Golf

In the interests of golf research, I've been conducting studies of the best method of vasodilation for playing golf in cold weather. (vasodilation - expanding arteries and veins to promote warmth)I've used the strictest scientific approach, i.e. it sleeted this morning so I went to the neighbour's empty section and practiced my wedges, imbibing a different vasodilator after every 25 shots.The first vasodilator I tried was brandy, followed by whiskey, rum, gin, and vodka (all alcohol was taken double-shot and straight, so as to rule out the effect of mixers). I measured vasodilation by the rosiness of my cheeks and accuracy of my shots. And whether or not the club stayed in my hands.Conclusions:1. If you're prone to shanking, don't imbibe anything because there's nothing like a frozen body to prevent shanking. 2. Brandy works pretty well. Cheeks had a wee tinge of red. Managed to hit 25 pretty good shots, with a high degree of accuracy, without shivering too much.3. Whiskey works pretty well. Cheeks definitely rosy. Managed to hit some good shots, never shivered.4. As expected, rum works brilliantly. Cheeks rosy red, only managed to hit half the balls but that was okay because suddenly I had double the targets I'd started with.5. Gin, yep, can see how the Brits managed to conquer so much of the world with it. There won't be any more unrestrained dogs around this neighbourhood again, no sirree. Not too many restrained ones, either, if those skinny shots over the fence are anything to go by. Cheeks glowing, nose glowing, ears glowing ... not sure what I'm hitting any more but they looked a bit like golf balls.5. Vodka!! Yep, this one's the best. Should've known the Russians would provide the answer. Yep, no doubt about it ... What was the question?

Core Rotation

After shooting 90 twice in a row, on two separate courses, I'm now desperate enough to book another lesson. Now I'll worry for the next three days because I know that Geoff will look at his notes from my last 27 lessons and every single one of them will say 'No core rotation'.
So I'll feel like a complete idiot because I just keep repeating the same fault over and over again. I can rotate my core fine when I'm having a lesson but as soon as I step on to a golf course, the only core that gets rotated is my apple.
See, even my core rotation jokes are weak!
What happened to those carefree distant days when everything tilted and rotated without my thinking about it?
Loss of confidence - that's what happened. Instead of merely stepping up to the ball and thinking about my target, I think about all sorts of technical stuff. And then my tempo goes as well.
For goodness sake, I tell myseft, it's just a game! World peace will not be threatened if I hit this shot poorly; I will not lose my life's savings if I pull this iron; a poor bunker shot will not result in debilitating injury.
Actually, a poor bunker shot could result in that. A couple of weeks back a friend hit the side of the bunker and it rebounded on to her eye.
I need to find some way to get back that carefree feeling. Some way that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol.
Hmm, maybe, if I could play that bunker shot so that it hit a little higher up...

Novel Cover and Blurb, Version 2

Here's version two of the novel cover.
Name changed from Out of Bounds to Mountain Mayhem.


The blurb now reads:
Mt Ruapehu erupts, providing Jane Walters with excuses for her golf and Elwood Thomas, an American vulcanologist, with clues to solving the question - are we alone? Elwood must persuade a reluctant Jane to help solve the enigma on unstable Ruapehu before the CIA catches up with them.

What sort of novel does the blurb indicate?
Does the cover grab your attention?
Does the title work?
Any other points?

Thanks for your help.

Best Beer Bar in Wellington

Fork and Brewer barNew Zealand must be one of the top beer countries in the world, when it comes to variety and excellence.
If you're a beer connoisseur, go to the Fork and Brewer in Bond street in Wellington. It must have the greatest range of beer in the city.
After attending Brew NZ 10 years ago, I discovered dark beers. I also discovered a number of NZ boutique breweries, many of which have grown and prospered over that time.
That was in the days when the Brew NZ festival was a lot more fun. Bars and restaurants would 'adopt' brewers and feature their beers, often matching them with food. You'd take your map and make your way around as many establishments as suited. (Being Wellington, you could walk around most of them so there were no worries about drinking and driving.)
We found the people behind the bars as passionate about the beer as the brewers, and would often spend more time at the places where the staff took the time to discuss the brewing process and the ingredients.
You'd have a couple of free tasters and then buy a glass of whichever one took your fancy.
At one bar we talked with a couple of Aussie brewers and ended up going to several bars with them. It was a great evening's fun and walking around the various venues helped you sober up between drinks.

Fork and Brewer tapsNow the Brew NZ is held at one large venue and I've stopped going because it's just not fun any more. You have to pay to get in, then you have to pay for samples and some of the brewers are in a hurry to move you on so they can get the money from the next punter.
And they've changed the name to the ridiculous 'Beervana'.
That says it all.
But I digress. This is supposed to be about the Fork and Brewer, who have 40 different beers on tap. And very original taps they are, too. A whisk, a flute, a roller skate. Several that I couldn't name, and it looked like every one was different. All placed on what looks like a very large wooden barrel.
My personal favourites include Tuatara Porter and Yeastie Boys 'Pot Kettle Black'.
Most of the beers are made in NZ but I did notice one Aussie beer, and it's a good one. Fat Yak pale ale. Having despaired of ever finding a decent Aussie beer in Queensland, last year we found Fat Yak. We've even bought it here in NZ - it's a great drink on a hot day after a round of golf.
We asked the barperson's opinion on the best beer and she pointed to a blackboard that listed all the staff picks. One of them was the Epicurean 750ml bottle of Coffee & Fig Imperial Oatmeal Stout. It sounded wonderful but when she told us it cost $35, we decided to wait for a special occasion.

And these days, with brewers producing such flavoursome beers, why wouldn't you celebrate with a special beer, rather than champagne?

Rest room gets 10/10 for originality Very apt toilet sign for a beer bar

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Buckley Golf Course, Shannon

7th teeNow for a course at the opposite end of the scale to Cape Kidnappers - Buckley Golf Course at Shannon, 20 minutes south of Palmerston North.
It'll cost you $239 less than your game at Cape Kidnappers. In fact, it'll cost you less than lunch at Cape Kidnappers!
Yes, the green fees at this little gem of a layout are a mere $10.Okay, the greens here aren't as good as the fairways at Cape K but ... obviously when you see the huge difference in fees, your expectations are different.Personally, I love this course and think it represents amazing value for money. It's 18 holes, but you play the first three holes twice - they're holes 1-3 and then 16-18, with different tees on one of them, second time around. They are regularly mown and when you play the middle 12 holes, you're sharing them with sheep.
8th teeI would recommend playing Buckley in summer or after at least a week of fine weather if it's winter. If it's been a wet winter, the par 5 7th hole at the bottom of the course can get too boggy. And if the sheep haven't been on the course in a while, you may lose your ball in the middle of the fairway.However, play it in fine weather and you will get both an interesting and challenging game of golf. I find the middle 12 holes way more interesting than the others.
I particularly like the 8th hole, a 309 metre par 4. You make your way up through the bush to an elevated tee which is beautifully framed by trees. Your drive goes on to an uphill slope, nice wide fairway, but you can't see the green for your second shot. I now decide on a club and then take one extra, because I haven't managed to ever hit this green.
The par 3's on this course are deceiving. They look straightforward but can really bite you on the bum if you don't give them the respect they deserve.
The 6th is a 121 metre drop hole ... such a considerable drop that there's a railing to hold on to on your way down the path to the green.
Miss this green long and you'll have a tricky chip back up to the green. If in doubt over club selection, I'd advise going for the short one. Especially if it's been a dry summer, because you can get spectacular bounces here.
There are two par 3's in a row, the 14th and 15th, which are the last holes on the sheep course before going back to the sheepless area again. The 14th is 142 metres long, with a bunker at the front right of the green and a  pond further right.
You can actually play this one well left because the lie of the land means the ball will bounce around on to the green, as long as you're up far enough. If you're a bit short, you're liable to end up in the drink or, if you're lucky, the bunker.

14th greenThe 15th is 128 ms and one of the more straightforward par 3's, unless you're a hooker.
The greens are electric fenced - easily stepped over or, if you want to fix your short putting (or too tight grip), easily grabbed.
The sheep fairways do get mown and, with 15cm placing, you're generally hitting off a reasonable lie.
They say "you get what you pay for" but at Buckley, I reckon you get more than you pay for.

Cape Kidnappers Golf Course

12th green

I'll start our 'best courses for tales at the 19th - you'll never have to buy another drink' list with what many golfers believe is New Zealand's top golf course.
Cape Kidnappers, (www.capekidnappers.com) in the Hawke's Bay, is currently ranked #33 on Golf Magazine's Top 100 Courses in the World.
The combination of the unique setting and Tom Doak's design make a round of golf unforgettable.
Cape Kidnappers is 500 feet above the water and the elevation gives you views of Hawke's Bay from every hole. Combine that with ravines you have to hit over and you’ve got a dramatic setting for a golf course. We played Cape Kidnappers four months ago, at the end of January. As there are a heck of a lot of great golf courses in New Zealand which only charge $35 for green fees, it had to be a special occasion to fork out $249 for a round of golf. We had a bit of a windfall and decided to spend some of it on what would probably be our one and only round at Cape Kidnappers. Teeing off just after 8.00, we had perfect weather and conditions. Even though I knew the course was owned by American billionaire, Julian Robertson, I found it a little ... strange ... that everyone we dealt with was American, from the person who buzzed us through the electronic gate to the entire staff at the clubhouse. Having said that, I'd give all the Cape Kidnappers' staff 10/10 for their welcome and helpfulness. We were obviously just one-off-visit kiwis, when their main market is an international clientele - golfers who have played the top courses in the world. Golfers who probably don't play many $35 green fee courses.
13th tee
The course has been set up to suit both walking and carting golfers so we chose to walk. There are no huge distances between greens and tees and the hills are reasonably gentle so it wasn't tiring. Okay, we have electric trundlers (which means I no longer struggle up Titahi's eighth hole, my benchmark for breathlessness), but I'd be happy to play Cape Kidnappers with a non-electric trundler.I've played a lot of courses in New Zealand and Cape Kidnappers is definitely the best manicured one I've come across. I had to fight the impulse to fix what looked like pitchmarks, because they were on the fairways, not the greens.The greens were fast, but not scary fast. Very challenging because of the undulations and size (most 30m or more). I had some awfully long putts because I was at the front of the green and the pin was at the back.
As long as the golfer matches their game to the appropriate tee (there are five sets), they will enjoy the course's challenges. The front tees (yellow) have you teeing off past most of the trouble, so will suit the long handicappers and those who hate losing golf balls.
We played off the red tees, which are the second set and probably suitable for those who are under a 19 handicap. If you top your tee shots, stick with the yellows (or take a couple of dozen extra balls in your bag).
One of the things I loved about the course was that you seldom saw another golfer, especially on the back nine. The ones we saw were either well in the distance or searching in the long rough ... generally both. 16th teeThe fairways are a very generous width.
After the first couple of holes, I came to the conclusion that 'if I have an average round, each shot will have cost me about $2.90' was not a good swing thought.
I played badly, but thought the course deserved all the accolades it receives.
The only thing I'd fault it on was lunch, which was very expensive. We had two sandwiches and two beers (both of which were nice) for $51.
High season green fees for NZ residents are $215, low season $170, GST exclusive. Non residents pay $285 and $385, GST exclusive respectively.
I suspect we may be going back again, because we're both sure we could score much better. Funny how I always think that, after I've played a course the first time. Funny how it so seldom proves true.

Most Difficult Hole

What’s the most difficult hole on your course? Par 3 over water? Par 4 with out of bounds on the right?No.It’s the 19th.The 19th is where it really counts, where you have your best opportunity to impress because you don’t even have to touch a golf club. It’s your chance to recount all those magnificent shots that carved the centre of the fairway and then took a horrific bounce into the rough. All those holes where you hit the ball superbly but bad luck dogged your score. If you can’t handle the 19th, you’re doomed. Doomed to smile and nod sympathetically while festering inside because no one cares about your game, your hard-luck stories.Because … other golfers have heard it all before. Their eyes glaze over, as they switch off and contemplate their own ill-fated bounces.I have great news for all golfers who struggle at the 19th.New Zealand.New Zealand, with its readily accessible, infinite variety of golf courses, is the excuse-makers’ paradise. It will provide you with score vindication which no one will question and you can back up your claims with convincing photographic evidence. Your golfing buddies will be so riveted they’ll forget it’s your turn to buy the drinks.We have a 9-hole golf course on an active volcano, Mt Ruapehu. There are golf courses around Rotorua and Taupo which incorporate thermal activity (boiling mud pools, fumeroles). Some courses use sheep as fairway mowers and they provide heaps of excellent 19th stories. Many other courses have spectacular scenery which will take the listeners' focus off your score and on to your story. Queenstown's Kelvin Heights would be near the top of that list.Over the following days, I'll cover some of New Zealand's most satisfying courses.Satisfying not only for golf, but also for the 19th.I did a similar article for an Aussie golf magazine a few years ago, but this series of blogs will update that.

Garden Golfing

I have developed a cunning plan to improve my scores at our club, and I'm sure it could work for you too.
I've volunteered to look after one of the gardens at our course. All it requires is a little weeding every month, and suggesting the occasional planting.
As I now have a reason to go to the course for something other than a game, I find I'm practicing more. It's easy to throw in the practice balls and a few clubs with the rake and gumboots.
Aha, I hear you say, that's how she's improving her game.
Well, actually no.
What I've discovered, while gardening, is how easy it is to ring bark trees without anyone noticing.



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Another Simple Golf Tip

Being basically a lazy golfer, I love simple golf tips which don't require swing changes. One of the best I received was way, way back in my interprovincial rep days. You don't have to change your grip, your alignment or any part of your swing what so ever.
Here it is: Whenever you pass by a green you haven't played yet, take note of where the pin is. Front, middle, or back? Then when you come to play the green, if you're dithering over a club to use, you'll know to take the bigger club if it's at the back or go with the shorter one for the front.
Some of the greens at our course can differ by as much as 3 clubs, depending on whether the pin's front or back.
This tip is also good for those of us getting on in years and desperate to exercise our memories, as the most diificult thing is remembering to do it. It's so ingrained in me now that I even check out the pins when driving past a golf course.

Agonising Golf and More Agonising Golf ebooks available
from smashwords.com