Josh Hilden's Blog, page 19

Favorite New Thing 1: “Zombie Royal Wedding”

This is the first installment of a new series. Every day we see things online and in the real world that blows our minds, turns us on, or makes us giggle. I want to share a few of these with you and explain what I love about them. I hope to do one of these a week but let’s be honest, I am a mercurial essayist so I might do 3 in a week and then not touch it for months.

We’ll see how it goes.



I saw this picture for the first time on Thursday September 11, 2014.





The artist, Tess Fowler Gutierrez (http://www.tessfowler.com), is one of my all time favorites and I am shocked I never came across this one until now. She posted it as a “Throwback Thursday” picture on her Facebook account and I was blown away by it and immediately made it the wallpaper on my phone.

So why is this piece my new favorite thing?

You all know I am a freak when it comes to zombies. I broke into the writing world based on my love and knowledge of the genre. Love my work or hate it you have to admit it is my raison d’être. So of course I am a sucker for good original zombie art.

(I'm not smart enough to put the image in here so Google Tess Fowler and Zombie Royal Wedding.)

But why did I choose this one?

Something not many people know about me, at least before the publication of this essay, is that I am a Royal Junkie. I mean I seriously Jones on the British Royal family like some people obsess on the fucking Kardashians.

I blame my mom, and not in a bad way.

When Charles and Dianna were married I was just a few days shy of five years old. It was a warm summer in south eastern Michigan and I remember all of the windows in the house were open. Mom had the television tuned into the wedding and at first I was less than pleased.

This was my gods damned cartoon time!

In order to placate me mom let me have an entire bottle of ice cold Pepsi, her drink of choice, and with that I settled in and prepared to be bored. But oh boy I was far from bored. From the costumes, to the pageantry, to the amazing buildings (this is the first images of London I can remember observing) I was hooked.

I’m not saying I fell in love with Diana Spencer that day… but I’m not NOT saying it either.

In the years following the Royal wedding I learned everything I could about the British Royals past and present. The more I learned the more I wanted to know. It was damn near a perpetual motion machine of interest. Even in the years when it appeared the family was falling apart I was always rooting for them.

I could go on and on but suffice it to say I am a royal Fanboy.

Now that the back story has been told on to the crux of my new favorite thing.

I like Prince William and Prince Harry. I truly and honestly hope they are the people they appear to be. Despite any and all youthful indiscretions, and let’s be honest we’ve all fucked up when we were young, they seem like admirable men.

I watched the progress of William’s relationship with Kate Middleton for years and eventually became, if it’s possible, even more enchanted with them than with his parents. They fascinated me and warmed the cold bitter cockles of my heart. When it was announced they were to be married I was as giddy as a school girl.

Hey, I’m Bi, I’m allowed to be a little gay about it!

Unfortunately when William and Kate were married I was working. I managed to catch bits and pieces of the wedding on my phone and on televisions at my day job (at night). Eventually I was able to watch it online and it was a beautiful and marvelous ceremony.

William was dashing.

Kate was beautiful.

Pipa was hot, I’m married not dead and she was hot.

Harry… meow.

I am stating right now for the entire world to read, and I don’t give a shit what you think about it, Prince Harry is a devastatingly handsome and dapper young man. I crushed hard on his mother in 1981 and I swooned for him thirty years later.

In the years since the wedding I’ve waited for the day the William takes the throne. I’m of the opinion that when Elizabeth either passes of steps down it will be William and not Charles who becomes king. With young Prince George fat and happy and Kate once more with child the future of the monarchy looks bright.

And Harry?

Well Captain Wales of the Royal Army is kind of a bad ass. I see him going far in this world despite some of the dumber things he’s done. He strikes me as a straight shooter who with some age will be a important man on the world stage.

Or I could be full of shit. I mean it wouldn’t be the first time.

Now I want to you take a good look at the picture, really study it. That piece is so exact and so detailed that it feels like the people might jump off of my screen!

Not to mention the young royals are kicking major ass.

Seriously, they are surrounded by the reanimated corpses of their family members and wedding guest but do they look like they feel defeated? Fuck no, they are have a look on their faces which screams they are just getting started and that the dead are in deep shit.

I hope I will be able to one day write something as awesome as this picture looks.

That is why this picture in my new favorite thing.



Just a final note before I bid you adieu.

Since I have a passing acquaintance with Tess online I felt the need to garner her permission before writing and posting this. I didn’t actually fear she’d say no, Tess is awesome and gracious, but I wanted to show the respect she deserved. I asked her if it was okay and I asked when the piece was created.

This is her response to my request.



“Lol of course you can.

It was created right after the wedding at the suggestion of my friend James Ray. And it was meticulously researched.

I had been watching it live and FBing about it. So as we talked online while it was happening and we were all joking around about the event James threw the idea out there and I ran with it

Took me a few days to gather enough high res photos and then we were off to the races.

It’s all accurate. Right down to the tall nun and small nun in the back.”



My follow up question was simply, “Did you make prints available for purchase?” To which Tess responded with the following.





“I did originally yes. They were an SDCC exclusive.

Most people understood the political tongue in cheek joke behind the piece but a couple ladies hated it.”



I love this piece and I love Tess as an artist… just wish I had one of the prints.



- Josh

(2 of 2) Essay #43 You’re The Inspiration 11 “Shoot For The Head Part 4”

Shaun of the Dead (2004)

What am I supposed to say about Shaun of the Dead?
This movie is one of the best Zombie movies ever made. For that matter it is one of the best comedies ever made AND maybe one of the best movies ever.
If you’ve never seen it shame on you.

Synopsis

Shaun (Simon Pegg) is an electronics shop employee with no direction in life. His younger colleagues show him no respect, he has a difficult relationship with his stepfather, Phillip (Bill Nighy), and a tense one with his housemate, Pete (Peter Serafinowicz), because of Ed (Nick Frost), Shaun's other housemate and crude, unemployed best friend. Furthermore, Shaun's girlfriend, Liz (Kate Ashfield), dislikes their social life, as they primarily spend every evening at the Winchester, Shaun and Ed's favorite pub; they never do anything alone together; Shaun always brings Ed, causing Liz to always bring her flatmates, David (Dylan Moran) and Dianne (Lucy Davis).
After a miserable day at work, Shaun meets an old friend, Yvonne (Jessica Hynes), who asks what he and Liz are doing for their anniversary; having forgotten to book a table at Liz's favorite restaurant, Shaun suggests the Winchester, leading Liz to break up with him. Shaun drowns his sorrows with Ed at the Winchester. They return home late and spin electro records, only to be interrupted by an enraged Pete, who is suffering a headache after being attacked and bitten by "some crackheads." Pete confronts Shaun on his flaws, telling him to sort his life out.

The next morning, an overnight zombie apocalypse has overwhelmed the town, but Shaun is too busy dealing with his problems and hangover to notice. He and Ed discover a zombie woman in their back yard, but assume she is just drunk, until she survives being impaled on a pipe. A fat zombie man also makes his way into the garden. Shaun and Ed flee inside, and learn from a news report the only way to kill a zombie is "by removing the head or destroying the brain". First fighting back with random objects and Shaun's records, Shaun and Ed arm themselves with a cricket bat and a shovel after breaking into their own locked shed. They kill the two zombies in the yard and by a process of elimination decide the safest place to wait out the crisis is the Winchester.

Shaun discovers a now zombified Pete in the shower, so he and Ed escape in Pete's car. They find Shaun's mother, Barbara (Penelope Wilton) and Phillip - who has been bitten - and switch cars after Ed deliberately crashes Pete's car in order to drive Phillip's Jaguar. They head over to Liz, Dianne, and David's flat and collect them. Before they make it to the Winchester, Phillip dies of his bite, after making peace with Shaun. Abandoning the car as Phillip zombifies, they set off on foot, bumping into Yvonne and her group of survivors. Imitating the zombies, they sneak over to the pub; however, Ed and Shaun get into an argument that alerts the zombies. David smashes the window while Shaun leads the zombies away. The five take refuge in the pub, and Shaun joins them after losing the zombies.

Several hours later, zombies converge on the pub. Shaun discovers the Winchester rifle above the bar is functional and they use it to fend off the zombies. Barbara reveals she was bitten along the way and dies, becomes a zombie, and after David antagonizes the situation, resulting in a Mexican standoff, the heart broken Shaun is forced to shoot Barbara. David is disemboweled and dismembered by the zombies after he attempts to shoot Shaun with the empty rifle; causing a frantic Dianne to unbolt the door to rescue him, disappearing into the crowd of zombies. Ed prepares a Molotov cocktail to fend them off, but Pete arrives and bites him. He manages to get over the bar and Shaun uses the cocktail to set fire to the bar, accidentally setting off the remaining rifle ammunition. They escape into the cellar, in which they contemplate suicide, but discover a service hatch to ground level. Shaun and Liz escape through the hatch as Ed stays behind with the rifle. Back on the street, as Shaun and Liz prepare to fight the zombies, the British Army arrives and guns down the remaining zombies, rescuing them. Yvonne, who has also survived, shows up and tells Shaun and Liz to follow her. They approach the safety of the trucks, reconciled.

Six months after the outbreak, the uninfected have returned to daily life, while the leftover zombies, retaining their instincts, are used as cheap labor and entertainment. Liz has moved in with Shaun, and Shaun is keeping Ed, now a zombie, tethered in the shed while playing video games.

Zombi 2 (1979)

Another Italian entry to the zombie genre this one is an unofficial companion movie to Dawn of the Dead (1979). In Europe Dawn is known as Zombi. I have a love/hate relationship with this one.
On one hand it has some seriously iconic zombie moments. The zombie vs. shark battle, which for what it’s worth I still think the shark should have won, the army of zombies marching down the George Washington Bridge, and of course the infamous eye impalement scene.
Considering my phobias that last one bothers me.
But that is all outweighed by some of the dumbest people in the history of zombie films. Seriously our ‘heroes’ all deserve to die.
But it’s a fun movie and every zombie fan, especially those of you who love the gore, should see it.

Synopsis

What appears to be an abandoned yacht drifts into New York Harbor. As two Harbor Patrol officers investigate, a huge, decomposing, flesh-hungry ghoul attacks the officers, biting one in the neck. The remaining officer shoots the hulking zombie and it topples overboard. The body of the deceased officer is deposited in the morgue.

Anne Bowles (Tisa Farrow) is questioned by the police because the boat belonged to her father (Ugo Bologna). All she knows is that her father left for a tropical island to work on some research. Reporter Peter West (Ian McCulloch) is assigned by his news editor (director Lucio Fulci in a cameo) to report on the mysterious boat and there he meets Anne. While on the boat, Anne and Peter discover a note from her father explaining he is on the island of Matool (Saint Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands) suffering from a strange disease. They decide to continue to investigate together. Upon their arrival in the tropics, they enlist the aid of a seafaring couple, Bryan Curt (Al Cliver aka Pier Luigi Conti) and Susan Barrett (Auretta Gay), to assist them in finding the island.

Matool is a cursed place where the dead have risen to attack the living. Dr. David Menard (Richard Johnson), a resident on the island and physician at the local mission, is investigating its secrets. His contemptuous, high-strung wife Paola (Olga Karlatos) wants to leave the island in fear of the increasing zombie attacks, but Dr. Menard insists on continuing his research.

The group is nearing the island when Susan decides to go for a dive. Anne and Peter look on as she brazenly goes into the water topless. While in the water, Susan encounters a shark, which tries to attack her, but she manages to hide among the coral reefs. She immediately surfaces and begs for help as the shark prepares to attack her. Bryan gets a gun and shoots the shark, but the shark hits the boat, causing them to lose control. Susan dives under again and tries to escape, and the shark narrowly misses her in its attack. As she is hiding in a coral reef, however, a zombie attacks her, but she manages to avoid the creature by slashing its water-bloated face with a piece of coral. The shark then turns and attacks the zombie, which proceeds to tear a chunk out of the shark; the two creatures battle until the shark mangles and severs the zombie's arm, after which the shark swims away, while the zombie seemingly gives up and heads in the opposite direction.

Susan manages to get on the boat as Anne, Peter and Bryan help her. She explains what she saw to them. Meanwhile, Dr. Menard and his nurse (Stefania D'Amario) continue to study the zombies. Some of them are newly bitten, some are in the zombiefication stage and some are already decomposing. Menard's local assistant Lucas (Dakar) appears at the door, says that the zombies are attacking everyone on the island, and asks how to kill the zombies.

Night falls and Menard's wife, Paola, takes a shower. The camera shows a zombie spying on her from outside the house. Paola gets out of the shower and sees the zombie. The zombie comes in and tries to open the door just as Paola is trying to close it. She manages to close the door and holds it shut with her body. The zombie's hands break through the door and grab her hair. In possibly the most famous scene from the movie, Paola's eye is pierced by a large splintered piece of wood and she is then killed off-camera.
The boat finally arrives at the dock. Back at the hospital the nurse wakes Dr. Menard from a deep sleep. She tells him that Matthias (Franco Fantasia) has died because of the infection. Dr. Menard waits for his friend's body to reanimate, then shoots him in the head. As Lucas is digging the graves of Matthias and the others that have died from the contagion, he sees a flare gun fire. He follows it and discovers the crew from the boat. Dr. Menard tells Anne about her father and when the contagion started. As they arrive, Lucas says that something happened to Fritz (Leo Gavero). He tells the group to go to his mansion, where Paola is located. He approaches Fritz and he says that he has been bitten.

The group arrive at the mansion where they discover the horribly mutilated corpse of Paola being hungrily devoured by zombies. A swarm of zombies attack them but they escape. They get in the jeep but lose control and drive off the road. Peter's knee is badly hurt. The group traverse through the jungle. Peter takes a rest and Anne examines his wound. Susan and Bryan explore their surroundings, and Bryan finds an old helmet. It appears that the group have stumbled onto a Spanish cemetery. Anne and Peter are lying on the ground and proceed to have an ill-timed love session when a zombie grabs her hair and another zombie grabs Peter's foot. Bryan hears Anne's scream; he leaves Susan to follow it. In another famous scene, a petrified Susan watches in horror as an ominous, worm-infested zombie conquistador rises through the earth, lunges at her, and tears out her throat. Bryan saves Anne and Peter but fails to save Susan. He shoots the rotting zombie in the back twice but it still stands, until Peter grabs a nearby wooden cross and smashes the zombie's head, destroying it. The group then head back to the hospital.

More and more zombies rise from their graves. The group finally arrive at the hospital and barricade themselves inside. Dr. Menard asks what happened to Paola and is told that she is dead. Dr. Menard explains to them that a voodoo curse has made the dead rise. He says he is still searching for a way to stop the curse. The zombies then begin their assault on the hospital. Dr. Menard goes to look for bullets, but is attacked and killed by a reanimated Fritz. Bryan sees the attack and shoots the rabid Fritz in the head as he ravenously gnaws on the doctor's cheek. The people who have been infected in the hospital begin to reanimate. A frothing black zombie bites a huge chunk of flesh and muscle out of Lucas' forearm. Lucas lets out a blood curdling scream, then silently dies of his horrific injury while the zombies start attacking the nurse. Peter hears her scream and tries to help her but a zombie breaks out the window. Peter shoots the zombie. He helps the nurse and continues his defense against the undead. The nurse goes to get some supplies but a reanimated Lucas grabs and bites her.

The zombies finally destroy the main door and break in. Peter and Bryan shoot at the zombies while Anne throws Molotov cocktails at them. They manage to stop some of the zombies and escape the hospital, which is now burning down. The last of the group are on the road heading to the boat and destroying more zombies, but a reanimated, blood-caked Susan appears in front of Bryan and bites his arm. Peter shoots the reanimated Susan in the head. They reach the boat and sail away. Now out at sea, Bryan is showing bad signs of contagion. He dies and they lock him in one of the rooms on the boat, taking the reanimated Bryan with them as evidence. When they reach the open ocean, however, they receive a radio report that a plague of zombies has attacked New York City. As the credits roll, the zombies are walking on the Brooklyn Bridge, leaving Peter and Anne to an unknown fate.

Zombieland (2009)

In his forward to the reissue of The Danse Macabre, Stephen King was cautiously optimistic about the upcoming movie Zombieland. But ultimately he feared it would be a stupid film. I hope he was pleasantly surprised by the end product.
Zombieland is the American Shaun of the Dead and I mean that in all of the best ways. The movie is funny, scary, touching, and thoughtful all in one package. I’ve seen it at least 20 times and it never feels old to me.
Now nut up or shut up!

Synopsis

Two months have passed since a mutated strain of mad cow disease mutated into "mad person disease" that became "mad zombie disease" which overran the entire United States population, turning American people into vicious zombies. Unaffected college student "Columbus" (Jesse Eisenberg) is making his way from his college dorm in Austin, Texas to Columbus, Ohio to see whether his parents are still alive. He encounters "Tallahassee" (Woody Harrelson), another survivor who is particularly violent in killing zombies. Though he does not appear to be sociable, Tallahassee reluctantly allows Columbus to travel with him. Tallahassee mentions he misses his "puppy" that was killed by zombies, as well as his affinity for Twinkies, which he actively tries to find. Survivors of the zombie epidemic have learned that it is best not to grow attached to other survivors, because they could die at any moment, so many have taken to using their city of origin as nicknames, i.e. "Columbus" is from Columbus, Ohio.

The pair meet "Wichita" (Emma Stone) and her younger sister "Little Rock" (Abigail Breslin) in a grocery store. The sisters are con artists, and trick Tallahassee and Columbus into handing over their weapons by pretending that Little Rock was infected by the disease, then steal their Escalade. The two men find a yellow Hummer H2 loaded with weapons and go after the sisters. However, the girls spring another trap for them and take them hostage. Tallahassee steals his gun back and has a stand-off with Wichita, until Columbus lashes out in anger that they have bigger problems to worry about, resulting in an uneasy truce between them. The sisters reveal that they are going to the "Pacific Playland" amusement park in Los Angeles, an area supposedly free of zombies. After learning his home town has been destroyed, and his parents likely killed, Columbus decides to accompany the others to California. Along the trip, Columbus persists in trying to impress and woo Wichita.

When the group reaches Hollywood, Tallahassee directs them to Bill Murray's mansion. Tallahassee and Wichita meet Murray himself, uninfected but disguised as a zombie so he can walk safely around town (and play golf). Murray is killed when Columbus shoots him, mistaking him for a real zombie during a practical joke while watching Ghostbusters with Little Rock. Columbus realizes during a game of Monopoly that Tallahassee has not been grieving for his dog, but rather for his young son. Wichita becomes increasingly attracted to Columbus, and Tallahassee bonds with Little Rock, with whom he was previously at odds. Despite Wichita's attraction to Columbus, she fears attachment and leaves with Little Rock for Pacific Playland the next morning. Columbus decides to go after Wichita, and convinces Tallahassee to join him.

At Pacific Playland, the sisters activate all the rides and lights, attracting nearby zombies. A chase ensues, and just as the sisters are trapped on a drop tower ride called Blast Off, Tallahassee and Columbus arrive. Tallahassee lures the zombies away from the tower, creating a distraction for Columbus to get to the tower ride; both use the attractions to their advantage. Tallahassee eventually locks himself in a game booth, shooting zombies left and right. Columbus successfully evades and shoots through several zombies to reach the tower, but not before conquering some of his phobias and even changing one of his rules of survival. In thanks, Wichita kisses Columbus and reveals her real name, Krista; Little Rock gives Tallahassee a Twinkie. Columbus realizes he now has what he's always wanted: a family.

Honorable Mentions

There are also zombie movies I love to watch but I just don’t consider them as influences on me. They include but are by no means limited to these films and series. Every one of these movies, good and bad, are worth watching.
• Brain Dead
• CHUD (The first and NOT the second)
• Evil Dead Series
• Horror Express
• I, Am Legend
• Night of the Comet
• Night of the Creeps
• Quarantine 2
• Reanimator Series
• Resident Evil Series
• Return of the Living Dead Series
• The Crazies (2010)
• The Omega Man
• Warm Bodies
• Zombie Diaries Series

What about World War Z?

I was just about to finish this one when I realized I never mentioned the highest grossing zombie film of all time. This would of course be the 2013 adaptation of the Max Brook classic World War Z.
Well I’m not gonna talk about it, at least not yet.
I started to write about WWZ when I realized that after George Romero no other creator has contributed more to the genre than Max Brooks. With that being a bona fide fact I’ve decided Mr. Brooks needs his own installment in which I will cover his entire spectrum of work.


And that’s it for part 3 boils and ghouls. Next time we’ll delve into zombies in the print world, excluding Max Brooks stuff. So until next time keep your back to the wall and your ammo dry.




-Josh

(1 of 2) Essay #43 You’re The Inspiration 11 “Shoot For The Head Part 4”

I know, I know it’s been a while since the last installment of this series. I have been itching to get to this but the real world and the paying gigs have been taking precedence. Yes I know I’ve written a few essays since the last SFTH installment but those were pieces inspired by my then current feelings and not of my autobiographical narrative and therefore more driven by emotion than information.
But that is the past… and now moving forward.




The Non George Romero Zombie Flicks

Last time we waded through the entirety of George A. Romero’s cannon of films. It was fun and even I learned a few things about my creative foundations. Today we dive into the rest of the zombie film universe.
Where are you going?
Don’t run!
Look I promise we will not be delving into the entire catalog. There are hundreds of zombie movies out there and I have neither the time nor the inclination to talk about more than a fraction of them. There are so many of them that entire book could be written doing nothing more than giving a synopsis of the movies.
It’s enough to make my head hurt.
No in this part I will be concentrating on a small list of films, both good and bad, that I am particularly fond of for one reason or another. I will also only be covering English speaking movies. There are plenty of non English movies that are worthy of consideration on any best, or worst, list of zombie movies. But to tell the truth and shame the devil I have watched very few of these movies.
Go ahead and make your clucks of disappointment, I can wait.
Are you finished?
Good, now allow me to explain. The reason I can’t handle foreign zombie films no matter how awesome, Dead Snow and Zombie 108 I’m looking at you, is very simple. I can’t deal with dubbing and subtitles, say sorry but it’s the truth.
Now what can you expect as you read this seemingly gigantic essay?
Much like my Star Trek Series, shameless plug go check it out, I will be giving my thoughts on each of the films and a short rundown on what about why I love them so much.

FAIR WARNING!

Each movie will have the Wikipedia synopsis included for reader ease. I’m in no way trying to inflate word count by doing this, seriously look at my output too little word count is far from a problem. I just want you (the reader) to have the movie rundowns at your fingertips without having to search it. If you want to read the entire Wiki entries on the movies I have included the proper hyperlink in the headings. Due to my OCD the movies are presented in alphabetical and not chronological order.
Now let’s get to it.


The Movies

The foundations of the modern zombie genre lie firmly in the works of Mr. George A, Romero. But as much as I love George’s works, even the mediocre ones, he is far from the only writer/director to do the genre right. This is a list of the non Romero movies that have served as my creative inspiration in one way or another.



28 Days Later (2002)

Danny Boyle’s gut churning opus would deserve to be on the top of this list even if I wasn’t presenting these in alphabetical order. Now before you start screaming about how 28 Days is not a zombie movie may I ask you to do one little thing?
Shut the fuck up.
Seriously I have been arguing this point for 12 years now and I am tired of it. No I admit the infected of 28 Days are not zombies, but they are more faithful to the zombie genre than many of the so called zombie movies of the 21st century, and if you don’t agree you know what you can do.
Okay then, moving on.
I know in my liver that if there’d been no 28 Days Later I never would have been able to accept and even love the remake of my beloved Dawn of the Dead. The infected running through the streets of post apocalyptic London scared the ever loving piss out of me. Upon my first viewing of the film, on DVD the very day it was released, I ended up on my feet cheering for Jim as he was chased by the horde of infected.
It was intense to say the least.
In case I’ve failed to state my case clearly I love this movie, in is without a doubt my favorite non Romero zombie film. 28 Days Later is as close to a perfect movie as I’ve ever seen. Also it was my first exposure to one Mr. Christopher Eccleston… years before he was the Doctor.

Synopsis

In Cambridge, animal liberation activists break into a medical research laboratory with the intent of freeing captive chimpanzees. They are interrupted by a scientist (David Schneider) who desperately warns that the chimps are infected with "Rage," a highly contagious virus that is spread through blood and saliva. Ignoring the scientist, the activists release the chimpanzees. One of the chimps attacks an activist and immediately infects her, leading her to infect everyone else present.

Twenty-eight days later, in London, Jim (Cillian Murphy), a bicycle courier, awakens from a coma in St Thomas' Hospital. He finds the hospital—and the city—completely deserted with signs of catastrophe everywhere. Jim wanders into a church, where he is spotted and pursued by people infected by Rage. He is rescued by Selena (Naomie Harris) and Mark (Noah Huntley), who throw cocktails at the "Infected", resulting in the explosion of a petrol station. At their hideout in the London Underground, Selena and Mark explain that a blood-borne, rage-inducing virus spread uncontrollably among the populace, resulting in societal collapse. They claim that infection has been reported in Paris and New York, indicating that the situation is worldwide.

The next morning, Selena and Mark accompany Jim to his parents' house in Deptford, where he discovers that they have committed suicide. That night, two Infected see a candle Jim lights in the kitchen and attack. Mark is badly bitten and covered in blood from the infected; Selena quickly kills him, later explaining to Jim that the virus overwhelms its victims in no more than thirty seconds. This necessitates the immediate killing of people who may have been infected. She also assures him that, should he become infected, she would kill him "in a heartbeat." After leaving, at Balfron Tower, they discover two more survivors, Frank (Brendan Gleeson), a cab driver, and his teenage daughter, Hannah (Megan Burns), and are invited to spend the rest of the night with them.

Frank informs them the next day that their supplies, particularly water, are dwindling; and he plays them a pre-recorded radio broadcast, apparently transmitted by a military blockade near Manchester. The broadcast claims the soldiers have "the answer to infection" and invite any survivor to attempt reaching their safe haven. The survivors board Frank's cab in search of the signal source and, throughout the trip, bond with one another in various situations. When the four reach the deserted blockade, Frank is infected when a drop of blood from a dead body falls into his eye. As he succumbs, he is killed by the arriving soldiers, who then take the remaining group to a fortified mansion under the command of Major Henry West (Christopher Eccleston).

West shows the group that he keeps an infected soldier, Jim Mailer, chained in a back yard, demonstrating that his "answer to infection" entails waiting for the infected to starve to death while recruiting survivors to rebuild society, also revealing that Mailer was infected two days earlier. However, Jim discovers that part of the "answer" also includes luring female survivors into sexual slavery to rebuild the population with West's platoon. Jim attempts to escape with Selena and Hannah, but he's captured by the soldiers, along with the dissenting Sergeant Farrell (Stuart McQuarrie). During their imprisonment, Farrell theorizes that only Great Britain has been infected and is now quarantined; his theory is confirmed when Jim spies NATO aircraft conducting aerial reconnaissance, revealing that the virus has only spread through the UK, and has not reached mainland Europe.

The next day, Selena and Hannah are dressed in bouffant gowns, in preparation for being gang-raped, as two soldiers lead Jim and Farrell to be executed. When his escorts quarrel after killing Farrell, Jim escapes. After luring West and Davis to the blockade, Jim bludgeons Davis in the head with a crowbar. Jim runs back to the mansion where he releases Mailer. As Mailer attacks most of the platoon, Private Jones attempts to escape but is impaled by Jim's bayonet. Jim then finds Selena being taunted by Corporal Mitchell (Ricci Harnett). Jim then bursts into the room and brutally beats Mitchell, smashing his head against a wall and gouging his eyes out. Selena believes Jim is infected, because of his aggressive behavior; but Jim calms her by telling her, "That was longer than a Heartbeat". The two reunite with Hannah and run to Frank's cab, only for Jim to be shot by an infuriated West. After releasing West to Mailer and fleeing the mansion, Selena and Hannah rush Jim to a hospital. Jim is saved by Selena, but he is once again comatose. The group leaves Manchester.

Another 28 days later, around 61 days after the infection initially spreading, Jim is shown to be recovering at a remote cottage. Downstairs, he finds Selena sewing large swaths of fabric when Hannah appears. The three rush outside and unfurl a huge cloth banner, adding the final letter to the word "HELLO" laid out on the meadow. A lone Hawker Hunter T7fighter jet flies over the landscape. The infected are shown lying on roads dying of starvation. The jet flies over the three survivors waving and their distress sign while the pilot, speaking in Finnish, calls in a rescue helicopter. As it flies away, Selena says with a smile, "Do you think they saw us this time?"

28 Weeks Later (2007)

The follow up to the amazing 28 Days Later is a really good zombie flick. I will go so far as to say that the first 10 and last 20 minutes of the movie are comparable in terms of tension and terror to any parts of the first movie.
And as for the rest of the movie?
It’s really good. The visuals of post infection Britain are haunting. The scenes with kids and their father are touching and believable. Robert Carlyle is at the top of his game and shows that the man is a master o emoting years before he was Mr. Gold. Jeremy Renner and Harold Perrineau are solid in their roles. The action and movement of the storyline is spot on, really I should hold this movie somewhere in my horror top ten but I can’t.
Because for all of that being said the movie sticks in my craw.
At the end of the movie when the kids, Renner, and the hot female doctor are escaping a freshly infected London the car they seek shelter in needs to be push started, have the clutch popped for all you youngsters. As this is happening the US Airforce is in the process of dropping nerve gas all over central London.
Sigh…
I can suspend disbelief, I really can. I can accept a rage virus wiping out the whole of the UK. I can accept the United States being the good guys who attempt to rebuild. I can even accept that a kid with two different colored eyes would be a non symptomatic carrier of the virus. These things, no matter how out there, are firmly within the rules of this movie universe.
Do you know what I can’t accept?
JEREMY RENNER PULLING HIS TURTLENECK OVER HIS MOUTH AND NOSE WILL NEVER PROTECT HIM FROM FUCKING NERVE GAS!!!
Okay, that’s it, I’m done with this one.

Synopsis

During the original outbreak of the Rage Virus, Don, his wife Alice, and four other survivors are hiding in a barricaded cottage on the outskirts of London. They hear a terrified boy pounding at their door, and they let him in. A few minutes later, they find that the Infected have followed the boy to them. The Infected attack and kill most of the survivors, while Don, Alice, and the boy are chased upstairs. Don is separated from Alice and the boy by the Infected and jumps out of a window, abandoning them. Don, closely pursued, desperately sprints to a nearby motorboat and narrowly escapes.

After five weeks, all the Infected have died of starvation. After eleven weeks, NATO forces headed by the United States take control of Great Britain. After eighteen weeks, the island is declared relatively safe, although still under quarantine. Twenty-eight weeks after the outbreak, an American-led force, under the command of Brigadier General Stone, bring in settlers to re-populate the area. Among the new arrivals are Tammy and Andy, Don and Alice's children, who were in Spain on a school trip during the initial outbreak. They are subsequently admitted to District One, a safe zone guarded by the U.S. Army, on the Isle of Dogs. As they are examined by Major Scarlet Levy, the District's Chief Medical Officer, she notes Andy's differently colored eyes, a trait inherited from his mother. Sergeant Doyle, a Delta sniper and his friend, Chief Flynn, a helicopter pilot, are amongst the military presence charged with guarding the District. Tammy and Andy are reunited with their father, who had survived the original infection, was found by the U.S. army, and has become the District's caretaker. In their new flat, Don explains what happened to him and their mother and that after escaping, he arrived in a military camp and survived by waiting for the Infected to die of starvation.

That night, Andy has a dream about forgetting his mother's face, so Tammy and Andy decide to visit their home to get a picture of her. The next day, they sneak out of the safe zone and proceed on a scooter through the depopulated London wasteland to their former home. To their shock, they find their mother at home, in a semi-conscious state. Doyle had seen Tammy and Andy leave the safe zone; they and their mother are quickly picked up by soldiers and returned to the district. Alice is taken to a quarantine room where she is tested and found to be an asymptomatic carrier of the Rage virus. While she does not show the uncontrollable rage, she is extremely infectious and the virus causes her eyes to discolor red. Don sneaks through the Security and makes an unauthorized visit to Alice in her isolation cell and asks forgiveness for abandoning her at the cottage. When they kiss, however, the Rage Virus in her saliva immediately infects Don, who savagely kills her before going on a rampage, killing and infecting several soldiers in the building.

General Stone orders the building to be quarantined and District One to be put into Code Red Lock-down, and civilians are herded into safe rooms. Despite the precautions, Don breaks into a room containing a large crowd and begins killing and infecting them, quickly causing a domino effect of attackers. Scarlet rescues Tammy and Andy from containment as the soldiers in District One are ordered to shoot indiscriminately after being unable to differentiate between infected and uninfected persons during the panic. Doyle, unable to bring himself to comply with the order, abandons his post and escapes with Scarlet, Tammy, Andy, and others through the Greenwich foot tunnel. General Stone then orders that District One be firebombed; but large numbers of the Infected, including Don, escape the bombardment. Scarlet informs Doyle that the children might hold the key to a cure and must be protected at all costs. Flynn arrives by helicopter to pick up Doyle, but he refuses to take anyone else as they would be shot down if carrying possibly infected people.

Flynn contacts Doyle by radio and tells him to head to Wembley Stadium, but to leave the civilians. Doyle ignores his instructions and begins escorting the civilians to Wembley, breaking into an abandoned car to escape nerve gas released to kill the Infected. He is burned alive by soldiers as he tries to push start the car. Scarlet drives the car away; an Apache gunship tries to destroy the car with Tammy and Andy, but all three manage to escape the chopper. She drives them into the London Underground where, as the trio continue on foot, she is ambushed and killed by Don who then attacks and bites Andy. Tammy shoots Don before he can kill Andy who remains symptom-free, but with his eyes discolored red like those of his mother, signifying that he is now an unknowing carrier of the Rage virus. They continue to the Stadium and are picked up by a reluctant Flynn, who flies them across the English Channel to France, as previously instructed by Doyle.

Twenty-eight days later, a French-accented voice requesting help is heard from the radio in Flynn's abandoned helicopter. A group of the Infected are seen running through a tunnel which, as they emerge into the open, is revealed to be the exit of the Paris Métro Trocadéro station with a view of the nearby Eiffel Tower.

The Dead (2010)

This movie is just fun!
There is nothing deep or layered about it. The Dead is a buddy road movie set during the zombie apocalypse and I couldn’t be happier with it. I picked this movie up on DVD on impulse, this was before I had Netflix and I wanted something new to watch.
It was an excellent choice.
The Dead is a zombie popcorn movie and that is a good thing.

Synopsis

Lieutenant Brian Murphy (Freeman), a United States Air Force engineer, is the sole survivor of the final evacuative plane out of Africa, which crashes somewhere off the coast of West Africa. The previous night, a zombie horde attacked many villages throughout that area. Brian gathers supplies from the plane crash and travels by foot until he finds and fixes a broken-down truck in a village he reaches. While driving, the truck gets stuck in a pothole as zombies close in. Daniel Dembele (Osei), a local African soldier gone AWOL in search of his son, rescues Brian from certain death. Daniel's wife had been killed in a zombie attack the previous night and a local military unit, heading north to a military base, had rescued his son. Daniel agrees to lead Brian to the nearest airport, a day's drive away, in exchange for his truck upon arrival for Daniel to use to find his son. At the airport, Brian attempts radioing for help using the air traffic tower's radio, but he receives no response. Daniel gathers fuel for the truck and the two agree it would be best to stick together and attempt travel to the military base, with Daniel hoping his son is there and Brian hoping they have a plane he can repair to fly back to the United States.

They rest for a night at a village that has been converted to a survival colony safeguarded by a group of local soldiers. They leave the following morning. While driving through the African plains, the truck hits a tree, breaking the axle and disabling the vehicle. Brian and Daniel continue on foot and sleep around a fire that night. A zombie horde attacks the group in their sleep, leaving Daniel bitten and badly wounded. They manage to shoot their way out of the attack and continue moving forward. Daniel tells Brian of a necklace he wears and that he planned to pass down to his son. Daniel succumbs to his wounds soon thereafter. Brian continues the trek alone to the northern military base. After an arduous journey through dangerous and rough terrain, Brian reaches the base, which has become a survival colony. He repairs an old radio unit in the base and broadcasts his name, managing to reach fellow American military officer Frank Greaves at a U.S. military base in Henderson, Nevada. It is revealed that the epidemic has reached the United States, which is rapidly failing to hold out. When Brian asks about his family, Frank informs him that "they're gone." Zombies invade the U.S. military base, ending the radio transmission. Brian goes back outside as zombies overwhelm the gates around the colony and begin killing all the survivors. At the last moment, Daniel's son approaches Brian, seeing his father's necklace in his hand. They hold hands and turn to face the overwhelming horde that approaches them.

Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane (2007)

I need to make a confession, I like bad movies. I’m sure that doesn’t come as a surprise to any of you but it needed to be said before we talk about Flight of the Living Dead. Because this movie is the text book example of the movie so bad it’s awesome.
The plot… wait, there’s a plot?
The characters… I only remember the sexy black bald guy and the girl with the most exposed cleavage.
The zombies… okay the zombies were well done. They weren’t the best zombies in modern movies but they were far from the worst. Also when they were coming through the floor of the plane like a whack-a-mole game in hell they were pretty cool.
I will say one truly good thing about this movie, other than it being a fun watch. The production values are excellent, if they’d had a better script this could have been a great movie.
I still love it though.

Synopsis

On a routine flight from Los Angeles to Paris, a renegade group of scientists has smuggled aboard a secret container holding a fellow scientist infected with a deadly genetically engineered virus which reanimates the dead. The virus is a variant of the malaria virus created by three scientists. They discovered and manufactured the virus with the intent of turning it into a biological weapon. Their goal was to produce soldiers who could continue fighting, even while mortally wounded. The virus is transmitted through bodily fluids. The infected have superhuman abilities, sprinting and leaping beyond human capabilities. The zombies become very durable, and one particular zombie survives despite being thrown into a plane's engine.

The 747 jumbo jet encounters massive thunderstorms, and the turbulence releases one of the scientists from the cargo hold. Two of the scientists go below to ascertain if the container has been damaged by the turbulence, and are also killed, starting a zombie outbreak. The uninfected passengers must fight for survival aboard the flight. No government will allow the infected airliner to land, leaving the survivors stranded in the sky with their ravenous tormentors. Billy, his wife Anna, Burrows, Frank, Paul, and Megan, a stewardess aboard the plane, are all that are left of the uninfected people. They must make their way to the cockpit and signal a fighter jet behind them that there are still living people aboard the 747 or the fighter will destroy them. After managing to get the MP5K from the dead guard, Burrows, Frank and Billy make their way from the tail of the plane to the cockpit, while the couple stay behind. Billy is bitten but manages to kill some of the undead passengers, while Anna comes to help Billy she gets bitten but kills the Undead by thrusting an umbrella into its mouth. After that they both get surrounded, Billy opens the emergency exit and most of the infected get sucked out.

Frank and Burrows make it to the cockpit where Frank kills the zombie copilot and pilot, and the two of them try to get the plane off autopilot and signal the fighter which fires at them. They are ultimately successful and waggle the plane's wings, alerting the fighter. The fighter pilot hits the abort key and the missile explodes away from the 747, but close enough to the plane to open a hole in the side. All the zombies are apparently sucked out. Frank and Burrows try to control the plane, but hit a mountain and crash land near Vegas, Nevada. The movie ends with Megan, Burrows, Paul, and Frank moving toward the city. The final scenes shows that some of the zombies also survive the crash and lurch toward the city.

The Last Man on Earth (1964)

The first adaptation of Richard Matheson’s classic novella I Am Legend and made in Italy Last Man on Earth stars the amazing Vincent Price at the height of his awesomeness. This is a good movie, it has always boggled my mind that this flick wasn’t better known until Will Smith’s adaptation of the original source material.
There have been claims that Romero was inspired by the Matheson story as well but I have never read or heard a definitive opinion on it. Regardless this is one you should consider looking at if you’ve never seen it.

Synopsis

In the year 1968, every day is the same for Dr. Robert Morgan (Price): he wakes up, gathers his weapons and then goes hunting for vampires. Morgan lives in a world where everyone else has been infected by a plague that has turned them into undead, vampiric creatures that cannot stand sunlight, fear mirrors, and are repelled by garlic. They would kill Morgan if they could, but fortunately, they are weak and unintelligent. At night, Morgan locks himself inside his house; during the day, he kills as many vampires as he can, burning the bodies.

A flashback sequence explains that, three years before, Morgan's wife and daughter had succumbed to the plague, before it was widely known by the public that the dead would return to life. Instead of taking his wife to the same public burn pit used to dispose of his daughter's corpse, Morgan buried her without the knowledge of the authorities. When his wife returned to his home and attacked him, Morgan became aware of the need to kill the plague victims with a wooden stake. Morgan hypothesizes that he is immune to the bacteria because he was bitten by an infected vampire bat when he was stationed in Panama, which introduced a diluted form of the plague into his blood.

One day, a dog appears in the neighborhood. Desperate for companionship, Morgan chases after the dog but does not catch it. Sometime later, the dog appears, wounded, at Morgan's doorstep. He takes the dog into his home and treats its wounds, looking forward to having company for the first time in three years. He quickly discovers, however, that it too has become infected with the plague. Morgan is later seen burying the dog, which he has impaled with a wooden stake.

After burying the dog Morgan spots a woman in the distance. The woman, Ruth, is terrified of Morgan at first sight, and runs from him. Morgan convinces her to return to his home, but is suspicious of her true nature. Ruth becomes ill when Morgan waves garlic in her face, but claims that she has a weak stomach.

Morgan's suspicion that Ruth is infected is confirmed when he discovers her attempting to inject herself with a combination of blood and vaccine that holds the disease at bay. Ruth initially draws a gun on Morgan, but surrenders it to him. Ruth then tells him that she is part of a group of people like her — infected but under treatment — and was sent to spy on Morgan. The vaccine allows the people to function normally with the drug in the bloodstream, but once it wears off, the infection takes over the body again. Ruth explains that her people are planning to rebuild society as they destroy the remaining vampires, and that many of the vampires Morgan killed were technically still alive.

While Ruth is asleep, Morgan transfuses his own blood into her. She is immediately cured, and Morgan sees hope that, together, they can cure the rest of her people. Moments later, however, Ruth's people attack. Morgan takes the gun and flees his home while the attackers kill the vampires gathered around Morgan's home.

Ruth's people spot Morgan and chase him. He exchanges gunfire with them, and picks up tear gas grenades from a police station armory along the way. While the tear gas delays his pursuers somewhat, Morgan is wounded by gunfire and retreats into a church. Despite Ruth's protests to let Morgan live, his pursuers finally impale him on the altar with a spear. With his dying breaths, Morgan denounces his pursuers as "freaks," and declares that he is the last true man on earth.

Quarantine (2008)

I saw this movie with my oldest son at the dollar theater, although the tickets cost more than a dollar now. Frankly I think that’s fraud and I am considering burning the building down.
Forget you read that.
I think the only reason we wanted to see it was because we had some weird attraction to Jennifer Carpenter. I’m not saying a I watched the Dexter porn parody because the actress playing Deb looked a lot like Jennifer Carpenter but I’m not saying a I didn’t either.
I left the theater pissed off.
I hate nihilistic endings. I have no problem with a massive body count in a zombie movie but for the love of Tesla leave the door cracked for a potential positive conclusion. That final scene left you with no doubt that she was a dead woman. Even Dawn of the Dead (2004), the worst offender in this trend of nihilistic endings, left a sliver of hope.
I didn’t watch it again for a year.
When I saw Quarantine again, honestly because I had nothing better to do, I went in with a new perspective. I watched the movie not as a zombie apocalypse movie but instead as the initial point of outbreak, I know that sound like a technical bit of nonsense but it made a difference. Looking at it that way I really liked it.
The acting is good, the scares are plentiful, and the pacing is fast. Also Jennifer Carpenter in a wife beater… yeah.

Synopsis

A television reporter named Angela Vidal (Jennifer Carpenter) and her cameraman Scott Percival (Steve Harris) are assigned to follow firefighters Jake (Jay Hernandez) and Fletcher (Johnathon Schaech) on their night shift. The crew responds to an emergency call from an apartment building. The apartment manager Yuri (Rade Sherbedgia) says that he and other residents heard screams from the room of an old woman named Mrs. Espinoza (Jeannie Epper), who has locked herself in her apartment. Jake, Fletcher, Yuri, police officers Danny (Columbus Short) and James (Andrew Fiscella), and the camera crew go to the apartment, where they find Mrs. Espinoza in serious condition. She is bleeding severely and foaming at the mouth. Moments later, they are attacked by Espinoza who bites James in the neck. They take him downstairs for medical assistance, while Fletcher stays with a now sedated Mrs. Espinoza upstairs. However, when they get downstairs, they find the apartment doors have been locked from the outside, leaving everyone, including several residents, trapped inside. Upstairs, Fletcher is attacked by Mrs. Espinoza and thrown from the railing to the ground, leaving him in serious condition. Lawrence (Greg Germann), a veterinarian, starts tending to the injured as best as possible.

Angela and Scott return to Espinoza's apartment where they witness the cleaning woman die. Jake and Danny show up and find Espinoza, with blood on her mouth and dress and her eyes bleeding. She charges at them, but Danny shoots and seemingly kills her. Jake, Scott, and Angela head room to room to bring down anymore guests; they bring down Randy (Denis O'Hare), Jwahir (Sharon Ferguson) and Nadif (Jermaine Jackson) (an African couple who don't speak English), and Elise (Stacy Chbosky), a woman who has many similar symptoms as Mrs. Espinoza.

The residents begin to panic as the CDC quarantines the building. Meanwhile, Angela interviews the tenants. A little girl named Briana (Joey King) is sick with bronchitis and says that her dog Max is at the vet because he's sick as well. After the interviews, Lawrence explains more about the conditions of Fletcher, Elise, and James as they all have symptoms similar to those of rabies, however, presenting themselves at an alarming rate.

Angela and Scott follow residents Bernard (Bernard White) and Sadie (Dania Ramirez) back to their apartment to check the TV news. On the way, they witness Randy being killed by a dog who corners him in the elevator. Once inside the room, they watch the televised report where the Chief of Police (Michael Potter) states to a news reporter (Jane Park Smith) that everyone has been evacuated from the building, then the power goes out. Elise appears, turns violent and starts attacking the others, but Scott bashes her head in repeatedly with his camera, killing her.

While going over the status of the tenants, Danny learns that Randy and the cleaning lady are dead, Jwahir has a paralytic father living with her and Nadif in their apartment, and a man from Boston that rented the attic apartment hasn't been seen for days. Two CDC Agents (Craig Susser and Bert Jernigan) wearing hazmat suits arrive and attempt to treat Fletcher and the policeman by taking a brain sample. Suddenly, Fletcher attacks and bites one of the inspectors. While evacuating, Lawrence is trapped with the infected and is bitten.

The surviving health inspector reveals that the previous day, a dog was taken to a local veterinarian. The dog became violent and killed or infected the other pets at the clinic, causing them to be euthanized. The CDC traced the dog back to the apartment building. The CDC Agent tells the residents that this unknown but highly virulent disease turns people into bloodthirsty savages. Angela discovers that the infected dog was Briana's dog, Max. The remaining survivors become skeptical that Briana's illness is actually bronchitis. Suddenly, Briana becomes savage as well and bites her mother Kathy (Marin Hinkle) before escaping upstairs. Kathy is handcuffed to the stair railing to stop her from trying to protect Briana.

Angela, Scott, Jake and Danny find Briana in Mrs. Espinoza's apartment. When Danny attempts to sedate the girl, Briana bites him. Mrs. Espinoza, who survived the earlier shooting, then attacks. She is finally killed by Jake with a sledgehammer. They rush downstairs only to find everyone else running upstairs in fear, for they find the infected have broken through the shutter. Jake tries to close the shutter, as Angela tries to free Kathy. When they can't find the key, Jake drags Angela upstairs leaving Kathy to die by the infected. As everyone runs upstairs, Jwahir and Nadif are both separated and bitten.

Angela, Jake, Scott, Sadie, Bernard, Yuri, his wife Wanda (Elaine Kagan), and the CDC Agent lock themselves in an empty apartment. The CDC Agent locks himself in an adjacent room when he realizes he has been bitten. They also realize Sadie has been bitten when they notice she is eating her own fingers and soon after coughs up blood on herself. Bernard pleads with them not to kill Sadie, and out of desperation, attempts to break through the apartment window to call for help, but he is killed by a sniper positioned in a building across the street from the apartment. Yuri remembers another way out in the basement, where there is a large drain that is connected to the sewers, but the keys are in his apartment. Suddenly, the health inspector and Sadie succumb to the infection and bite Yuri and Wanda. As they try to escape, they must fight off the infected as they work toward Yuri's apartment as Jake uses the sledgehammer on the dog in the elevator. After Jake and Scott break Sadie's neck, the group reaches Yuri's apartment and find his key ring. Jake is bitten by Yuri, leaving Angela and Scott as the only survivors. Rather than making their way to the basement, they are forced upstairs to the attic apartment by Danny and the remaining infected.

They search the apartment and discover that its former tenant was a member of a doomsday cult who broke into a chemical weapons lab and stole a mutated rabies virus. As Angela and Scott continue through the apartment, a door opens from the attic and Scott uses the light on the camera to investigate. An infected boy (Benjamin Stockham) swats at the camera, breaking the light. Scott turns on the camera's night vision. Scott and Angela hear loud banging noises inside the apartment. When Scott looks around, he sees a ghoulishly emaciated man (Doug Jones) searching the kitchen area unaware of Angela and Scott's presence. Scott tries to escape but trips and is viciously attacked, dropping the camera. Angela retrieves it and sees the man eating Scott. Unable to control herself, she cries out and is subsequently attacked, dropping the camera in the process. Strangely unharmed, as the attack deflected off the camera, she crawls slowly through the darkness for almost ten seconds, in a vain attempt to escape. Suddenly, she is dragged backwards by her legs into the dark, screaming as the camera continues recording.

Two Years On

Okay I know you were expecting the next installment of the Shoot for the Head series of essays but that will have to wait until next time. This is an important time for me and I need to share it with you. But it wouldn’t be a Josh essay without some serious bitching and whining, as my middle bother he’ll invite you to join his organization and subscribe to his newsletter.

Alright that was catty but it doesn’t make it unfunny.

Anyway read what comes next if you want to. Or don’t I don’t make a dime off of these (as you’ll read below) so if you’d rather get high and laid more power to you.



Yesterday I was looking through some of my reviews on Amazon. This is something I do maybe once every two weeks. Not because I’m afraid of reviews but because I’ve reached the point where I just don’t give a shit about the bad reviews and I like to be surprised by the good ones. But regardless of what I normally do I had a wild hair up my butt and decided to read some of the bad ones.

Shoot me I’m as human and masochistic as the next writer.

The bad reviews, yes there were more than one by the same jackhole, were on my essays. Not just my essays but on the old Cautious Descent essays. These works are clearly not fiction and I am up front on all of them that they are rough and raw. The reader, I won’t say customer because the opinionated son of a bitch got them for free, didn’t like them and gave me one star on each.

That’s fine. I mean seriously, who the fuck am I to judge someone else’s taste? But that being said I want to address a few things before moving on to the main thrust of this essay.

The first is my charging for my essays. If I could make them free all of the time I would. As it is I keep them at $0.99 and make them free for 5 days out of every 90 which is the best Amazon allows us to do. The essays are written for two reasons. First they keep me honest, if I put the truth of my views out there I can always point at the essays when people accuse me of flip flopping and say “Fuck you check the record!” or some other bullshit. The other is business motivated, the more work I have out there the easier my name pops up in searches.

Yep, I’m a whore… big fucking shock.

The second thing I want to address is a charge the jackass made in his “Review” of the free work. He made the claim that I state I’m a great writer and then proceeds to “Prove” I’m not. I actually went back to the files and read the essays to see what the hell the mother fucker was talking about. I read them three times and still can’t figure it out. Apparently he sees secret patterns and hidden meanings in other peoples writing.

I wonder if his neighbor’s dog talks to him at night.

The final thing he bitched about was my favorite old chestnut. He had a problem with my potty mouth. HE also had a problem with my disgusting sexual past. I’m not sure if he means me being bisexual, me having been raped as a child, or both. It doesn’t matter because I won’t be addressing that, frankly he sounds too much like some members of my family.

As to my foul language… he can go fuck himself.

I’m almost ashamed to admit I let this asshole get under my skin. I like to think I’m tougher than that. I almost started second guessing the way I do things. Then I looked at his review history and it became crystal clear. He hasn’t found a written work he doesn’t love to hate.

I do the things I do the way I do them because it’s the right way for ME. If you don’t like it or me you are free to never read a piece of my work again and return them to Amazon for a full refund… oh wait you didn’t pay for a gods damned thing you fucking leech.

Ugh, can’t believe a wasted half an hour of my time on him.

Okay I’m done with that, now on to the real reason for this essay.

It has been two years since I shit canned any desire I used to have to be traditionally published and instead set out n my own path. In July of 2012 I founded Gorillas With Scissor Press and took the biggest chance of my adult life, I self published. I was scared shitless, I know I talk a big game and act like I have the giant writers ego but the reality is I am terrified every time I hit that publish button.

My first steps in those early months were tentative and almost childlike. I had no idea what I was doing and instead of reading the instructions or looking towards the people I knew who’d already made the leap I dove in head first and prayed I didn’t smash my head in the shallow end of the pool. What can I say? It’s just the way I am. That’s probably why my Lego’s never looked like the pictures on the box when I was finished building them.

My first publications were rough to say the least.

I will NOT apologize for this. Yes the editing and formatting was poor but if I’d have waited until it was perfect I never would have published in the first place. In the end you learn by doing and the mistakes I made in the first year to 18 months of publishing were worth more to me than all of the classes and tutorials in the world.

As I did I learned… it’s that simple.

I stumbled and made mistakes like everyone does. I spent money I shouldn’t, I worked with people it might have been best to avoid, and I jumped at a few opportunities that turned out not to be so great. Each misstep could have derailed me and made me toss in the towel but instead they prodded me to try harder and do better.

My production rate and quality of work increased with each finished project. The number of projects doubled and tripled as the months went by but it never felt like I have too much to do without enough time to do them. Good, bad, or mediocre each finished project ramped up my confidence. Quantity has a quality all its own. Of course just because you can write a lot doesn’t mean its good… but if you don’t write you’ll never get better.

Yeah it confuses the shit out of me as well.

What was I talking about again?

Oh right, my “self publishing journey” or some such bullshit.

In January of this year I bit the bullet. During the first year and a half of my Indie Writing career I didn’t employ a full time professional editor. I relied on Beta Readers and the help of talented amateurs. I just couldn’t make myself pay the money needed to polish the books when I was barely making a profit as it was.

We all have to take a chance at some point and this was my time.

I tested several editors and editing companies and was less than thrilled with the results. There are some excellent established Indie Editors out there but they aren’t cheap and they usually have a long backlog of projects they are working on. Thus I was reduced to sampling editors just getting their start.

There was a lot of pain in that search.

Like most things it turns out my answer was near at hand all along.

Jennifer had been a book buddy of mine for awhile and when she expressed an interest in getting an editing company off the ground I was intrigued. I gave her a sample piece, she shredded and reassembled it, and the resulting product was the most professional looking product I’d ever produced.

I signed a one year exclusive contract with her company, Gypsy Heart Editing (www.gypsyheartediting.com), then and there. Since then we’ve been like the Wonder Twins without the implied incest or retarded space monkey. Since that day my work’s quality, both volume and entertainment value, has skyrocketed.

Thank you Blue Falcon!

On August 14th I am making my debut on the convention circuit. I will be sitting behind a table at Gen Con in Indianapolis Indiana. I’m excited and I am terrified. I feel like I did when I hit publish on that fist novella in 2012. I’m sure it will be fun, hell Gen Con is always fun, but I have this feeling that I ‘m on the cusp of the next step of the career ladder.

Epicness is bound to ensue.



Alright that’s it. I’ve bitched and crowed in equal measure. I just want all of you to know I wouldn’t be here if not for all of you. Whether you love me or hate me your readership and spurred me forward. I love all of you, even those of you I’d love to throat punch.





-Josh

You’re The Inspiration 9 “Shoot for the Head 3- Dawn vs. Dawn”

My Thoughts on Remakes



I know I said in the next installment we’d be pushing beyond the works of George Romero but as the writer I reserve the right to change my mind at the drop of a hat. As I am writing this it’s the 4th of July and I am enjoying the traditional Hilden Horror Movie Marathon. But to be fair I’ll take every opportunity to enjoy some horror. So today I decided to watch both versions of Dawn of the Dead back to back.

I’m surprised I’d never done that before.

I’ve been vociferous on the point that the 1978 version of Dawn is my all time favorite movie. I’ve talked about my Uncle Jerry showing me the movie many times so I won’t restate it here. It is fair to say that I’ve watched Dawn 1978 more than any other movie with the exception of the Original Night of the Living Dead.

When they announced the remake of my beloved Dawn of the Dead I wanted to cut a bitch and when I learned George Romero was having nothing to do with it I wanted to start punching the homeless!

I’d been worried when the 1990 version of Night of the Living Dead was announced. I’d been so worried that when it came to the theaters I waited a week to hear the reviews. Yes I know now all I need to do is watch Twitter to see if I should avoid a flick, I’m looking at you After Earth, but this was in 1990 and the internet was a thing for University Nerds and DARPA scientists. The movie turned out to be good so in the end I was happy it’s been remade.

Do you know what happened between Night 1990 and Dawn 2004?

What happened was Star Wars Episode 1 The Phantom Menace.

Now before you roll your eyes and dismiss me as another anti prequels nut job just wait. I do have a point and it’s not based in irrational hate. I actually like the Star Wars Prequels, I don’t think they’re as good as the originals but I’ve enjoyed each of them. My problem is with Episode 1. It’s not with Jar-Jar, it’s not with Jake Lloyd, and it’s not with CGI Yoda either. My problem is that it half a movie at best. Interesting threads were abandoned or not focused on enough and dumb shit was pushed to drive movie product tie-ins.

But the pod racer scene was really cool.

So what’s my point?

I was waiting with baited breath as the release of Episode 1 drew close. I recorded the premiere of the John Williams music video on a VCR (yep I’m old) and watched it a hundred times. I bought all of the prerelease toys. And I scoured the archaic and clunky 1999 internet for rumors and information. I saw it opening night and left the theater feeling like I’d been ruffied.

I don’t mean I felt like George Lucas raped me, tool my kidney, and left me in a bathtub filled with ice and note telling me to head to the hospital. I’m not one of those overreacting uber-fans. What I mean is that I went into that theater with my hopes ratcheted so high that it was probably impossible for me not to feel disappointed. In subsequent viewings I came to appreciate the flick and actually enjoy a few things in it quite a bit.

While Episode 1 was not a remake it did leave me gun shy when it came to movies and television I loved being tampered with. I know that’s a pretentious position to take and I should just be glad things are being made… but in the end I’m a cantankerous bastard.

But in the end I am a zombie zealot and despite those feelings I bought a ticket for opening day and with my oldest daughter and my mother. Karen had the flu and I didn’t want to go by myself, I love zombies but half of the reason I love them is because they terrify me. Grumbling and ready to start throwing things at the screen in a moment’s notice I sat down to watch Dawn of the Dead 2004.

I really wanted to hate that movie. I swear I entered that theater prepared to storm out in righteous indignation screaming my hate at the poor stupid kids who worked the concessions stand and making sure they never trusted a bald fat man again. I would have marched up to the screen and pissed on it my dongle wagging in the open as an army of flashlight wielding ushers dragged me out of the theater.

That didn’t happen though.

I fucking loved it.

Not only was it a rocking zombie flick It also scared the shit out of me. My wife, still sick but feeling a little better, watched amused as I was unable to sleep until sometime around dawn. Fuck me that was a damn good movie. When I bought it on DVD it was added to my zombie collection with all the reverence of a Romero film.





The Movies



Before I compare and contrast Dawn 1978 and Dawn 2004 I want to provide you with a refresher. At heart I am a lazy man, my writing is punctuated by sprints of massive word counts separated by hour of cat videos and porn. With that being said I think I will leave it to a creature wiser than I, Wikipedia, to give you the run downs on both of the movies. I’ve provided the appropriate link for people reading this in digital format and copy/pasted the text for those of you either reading the print version or too lazy to click the link.

I’ll get back to you after the summaries.





Dawn of the Dead 1978 (Wikipedia)

Dawn of the Dead (also known internationally as Zombi) is a 1978 American horror film written and directed by George A. Romero. It was the second film made in Romero's Living Dead series, but contains no characters or settings from Night of the Living Dead, and shows in a larger scale the zombie plague's apocalyptic effects on society. In the film, a plague of unknown origin has caused the reanimation of the dead, who prey on human flesh, which subsequently causes mass hysteria. The cast features David, Ken Foree, Scott Reiniger and Gaylen Ross as survivors of the outbreak who barricade themselves inside a suburban shopping.[3]

Dawn of the Dead was filmed over approximately four months, from late 1977 to early 1978, in the Pennsylvania cities of Pittsburgh and Monroeville. Its primary filming location was the Monroeville Mall. The film was made on a relatively modest budget estimated at $650,000, and was a significant box office success for its time, grossing approximately $55 million worldwide. Since opening in theaters in 1978, and despite heavy gore content, reviews for the film have been nearly unanimously positive.

In addition to four official sequels, the film has spawned numerous parodies and pop culture references. A movie premiered in the United States on March 19, 2004. It was labeled a "re-imagining" of the original film's concept. In 2008, Dawn of the Dead was chosen by Empire magazine as one of The 500 Greatest Movies of All Time, along with Night of the Living Dead.[8]



Plot

The United States is devastated by an unknown phenomenon which reanimates recently deceased human beings as flesh-eating zombies. Despite the best efforts by the U.S. government and local authorities to control the situation, society is beginning to collapse and the remaining survivors are given to chaos. Some rural communities and the military have been effective in fighting the zombies in open country, but cities are helpless and largely overrun. Confusion reigns at the WGON television studio in Philadelphia by the plague's third week, where staff member Stephen Andrews and Francine Parker are planning to steal the station's traffic helicopter to escape the zombies. Meanwhile, police SWAT officer Roger DiMarco and his team raid an apartment building where the residents are defying the martial law of delivering their dead to National Guardsmen. Some residents fight back with handguns and rifles, and are slaughtered by both the overzealous SWAT team and their own reanimated dead. During the raid, Roger meets Peter Washington, part of another SWAT team, and they become friends. Roger tells Peter that his friend Stephen intends to take his network's helicopter, and suggests that Peter come with them. The matter is decided when they are informed of a group of zombies sheltered in the basement, which they execute with grim determination.



That night, Roger and Peter escape Philadelphia with Francine and Stephen in the helicopter. Following some close calls while stopping for fuel, the group comes across a shopping mall, which becomes their sanctuary. To make the mall safe for habitation, they block the entrances with trucks to keep the undead masses outside from building up enough cumulative force to break through; they also craft a wooden "false wall" to hide the access to their living space. During the cleanup operation, Roger becomes reckless and is bitten, dooming himself to the infection. After clearing the mall of zombies, the four enjoy a hedonistic lifestyle with all the resources available to them. As time goes by, however, they come to perceive themselves as imprisoned by the zombies, especially since Francine is four months pregnant. Peter offers to abort the child, but this is rejected. The men begin to consider leaving; Stephen, now seeing the mall as a kind of kingdom, opposes the plan, but teaches Francine how to operate the helicopter in case of emergency. Roger eventually succumbs to his wounds, reanimates, and is shot by Peter. All emergency broadcast transmissions eventually cease, suggesting that civilization as they know it has completely collapsed.



Their ironic salvation occurs when a gang of motorcyclists, having seen the helicopter during one of Francine's flying lessons, break into and start looting the mall, which allows hundreds of zombies inside. Stephen forces a gun battle with the bikers and is shot in the arm; he tries to escape through an elevator shaft, but is cornered by the undead and bitten several times. As some of the bikers, shot by Peter, were consumed by the zombies, the rest retreat with their stolen goods. A reanimated Stephen (apparently knowing enough to remember the false wall) breaks through it and leads the undead to Francine and Peter. As Stephen enters their hideout, Peter kills him while Francine escapes to the roof. Peter then locks himself in a room and contemplates suicide. When zombies burst into the room, he has a change of heart and fights his way up to the roof, where he joins Francine. The two then fly away in the partially fueled helicopter to an uncertain future.

ALTERNATE ENDING

According to the original screenplay, Peter and Francine were to kill themselves, Peter by shooting himself and Fran by driving her head into the spinning helicopter blades. The ending credits would run over a shot of the helicopter blades turning until the engine winds down, implying that Peter and Fran would not have gotten far if they had chosen to escape. During production it was decided to change the ending of the film.



Much of the lead-in to the two suicides remains in the film, as Francine leans out of the helicopter upon seeing the zombies approach and Peter puts a gun to his head, ready to shoot himself. An additional scene, showing a zombie having the top of its head cut off by the helicopter blades (thus foreshadowing Francine's suicide) was included early in the film. Romero has stated that the original ending was scrapped before being shot, although behind the scenes photos show the original version was at least tested. The head appliance made for Fran's suicide was instead used in the opening SWAT raid, made-up to resemble an African-American male and blown apart by a shotgun blast.

Done with the George version of Dawn?

Good deal, now take in the modern awesomeness that is the Zach Snyder iteration. Then we get to talk about what I like, love, and hate about the flicks.







Dawn of the Dead 2004 (Wikipedia)

Dawn of the Dead is a 2004 American horror film directed by Zack Snyder in his feature film directorial debut. A remake of George A. Romero's 1978 film of the same name, it is written by James Gunn and stars Sarah Polley, Ving Rhames, and Jake Weber. The film depicts a handful of human survivors living in a Milwaukee, Wisconsin shopping mall surrounded by swarms of zombies. The movie was produced by Strike Entertainment in association with New Amsterdam Entertainment, released by Universal Pictures and includes cameos by original cast members Ken Foree, Scott Reiniger, and Tom Savini.



Plot

After finishing a long shift as a nurse, Ana (Sarah Polley), returns to her suburban neighborhood and her husband, Luis. Caught up in a scheduled date night, they miss an emergency news bulletin. The next morning, a neighborhood child enters their bedroom and kills Luis who immediately reanimates as a zombie and attacks Ana. She flees in her car, but eventually crashes and passes out.



Upon waking, Ana joins with Police Sergeant Kenneth Hall (Ving Rhames), jack-of-all-trades Michael (Jake Weber), petty criminal Andre (Mekhi Phifer) and his pregnant wife, Luda (Inna Korobkina). They break into a nearby mall and kill a zombified security guard, who bites Luda. They are also confronted by three living guards—C.J. (Michael Kelly), Bart (Michael Barry) and Terry (Kevin Zegers)—who make them surrender their weapons in exchange for refuge. They split into groups to secure the mall and then go to the roof where they see another survivor, Andy (Bruce Bohne), who is stranded alone in his gun store across the zombie-infested parking lot.



The next day, a delivery truck carrying more survivors enters the lot, with zombies in close pursuit. C.J. and Bart wish to turn them away but are overruled and disarmed. The newcomers include Norma (Jayne Eastwood), Steve Marcus (Ty Burrell), Tucker (Boyd Banks), Monica (Kim Poirier), Glen (R.D. Reid), Frank (Matt Frewer) and his daughter, Nicole (Lindy Booth). Another woman (Ermes Blarasin) is too ill to walk; she is wheeled inside via wheelbarrow only to die and reanimate. After she is killed, the group determines that the disease is passed by bites. Andre leaves to see Luda, who has kept her bite hidden from the group. They realize that Frank has been bitten and is a potential threat. After some debate, Frank elects to be isolated. When he dies and turns, Kenneth shoots him.



Another montage shows the survivors passing time in the mall. Kenneth and Andy start a friendship by way of messages written on a whiteboard. When the power goes out, C.J., Bart, Michael and Kenneth go to the parking garage to activate the emergency generator. They find a friendly dog but are attacked by zombies, who kill Bart. The remaining men douse the zombies with gasoline and set them ablaze.



Meanwhile, Luda—in the advanced stages of infection and tied up by Andre—goes into labor and dies. She reanimates and the baby is born. Norma checks on the couple and kills the zombified Luda. Andre snaps; they exchange gunfire and both are killed. The rest of the group arrives to find a zombie baby whom they kill immediately. The remaining survivors decide to fight their way to the local marina, and travel on Steve's yacht to an island on Lake Michigan. They begin reinforcing two shuttle buses from the parking garage for their escape.



Andy is dying of starvation, so the group straps a food and a walkie-talkie onto the dog, Chips, and lower him into the parking lot. Andy calls for Chips, who is of no interest to the zombies. One zombie gets in the store before Andy can close the door. Nicole, worried about Chips, takes the delivery truck and crashes into the gun store, where she is trapped by a zombified Andy. Kenneth, Michael, Tucker, Terry and C.J. go through the sewers to mount a rescue. They reach the gun store, saving Nicole by killing Andy. They grab supplies and go back to the mall; along the way, Tucker is killed. Once inside they are unable to lock the door, forcing an evacuation.



Everyone gets into the buses and they navigate through the city. Glen loses control of a chainsaw, accidentally killing himself and Monica; blood splatters on the windshield causing Kenneth to crash the bus. A zombie attacks Steve as he tries to escape. C.J. exits the first van to look for crash survivors with Kenneth and Terry. They encounter the undead Steve but Ana kills him. She retrieves his boat keys, and they take the remaining bus to the marina. C.J sacrifices himself so the rest of the group can escape. Michael reveals he was bitten and Ana watches him kill himself, leaving Ana, Kenneth, Nicole, Terry and Chips as the only survivors.



A montage of footage from a camcorder found on the boat begins with Steve's escapades before the outbreak, and concludes with the group running out of supplies before finally arriving at an island, where they are attacked by another swarm of zombies. The camcorder drops, recording dozens of zombies chasing them, leaving their fate unknown.

Dawn vs. Dawn… Dead Not Red



Reading those rundowns doesn’t do either film justice. They are remarkable films in the their own ways and while it’s clear Snyder took great pains to pay homage to the original, listen to the filmmaker commentary on the DVD he’s an uber fan, he also crafted his own vision into something amazing and vibrant. But when comparing the films one is often better than the other although there are a few ties between them.

So here we go, I’m going to compare and contrast the aspects of the films where I believe there is a clear winner. I won’t be delving into the setting, storyline, or effects in truth I feel I’m too close to the material to do it properly. We will be looking at three criteria the heroes, the villains, and the endings.



The Hero’s:



In Dawn 1978 there are four heroes (Frannie, Peter, Roger, and Stephen). It’s a tighter and more intimate cast of speaking parts when compared to Dawn 2004 which has a main cast of nearly a dozen.

In 78 the group is tight knit and emotionally independent. They need one another and despite some initial friction, Stephen feeling like the SWAT officers think he’s an idiot and Frannie demanding her right to be treated as an equal and not as the “Den Mother”, they come together. The love and trust between them is clear.

In 2004 the cast in ensemble in nature and provide a surprising depth. There are several points of engaging conflict, between Kenneth and Andre and between CJ and the initial survivors being the most intense and complex, which gives us something more amazing than one would expect in a horror movie.

I can’t complain about either cast. They both work on different levels trying compare and contrast them is unfair. I could run down the characters and never be able to decide which one to which has the better casting. For example Peter and Kenneth are the Supermen of the movies. They are strong, black, disciplined, and kick more ass than any five other characters. They are THE heroes if I am forced to put that label on one character in each movie.



(Side Note: I met Ken Foree, Peter in 1978, a few years ago at a convention. He is without a doubt one of the coolest people I’ve ever met).



That being said I can break this tie in one way.

In the final analysis it comes down to the women.

Gaylen Ross plays Frannie in 1978 and Sarah Polly plays Anna in 2004. Gaylen was a rookie actor who didn’t have a long career in front of the camera and Sarah has been acting her entire life. Both of them are excellent in their roles.

Frannie is a single pregnant woman demanding respect from these men in a world gone mad. She demands that she never be left unarmed, that she be part of every planning session, that she be taught to fly the helicopter, and she refuses to marry Stephen because it wouldn’t be right. Gaylen pulls it all off without looking or sounding fake. She plays terror when the Hare-Krishna zombie who invaded their refuge above the mall. And she plays sexy in a single scene in front of a makeup mirror while holding a revolver.

Anna is a woman from a clearly different time. There is no need for her demand her place amongst the survivors. Far from it the Milwaukee nurse is the only person all of the varied personalities in mall trust and will listen too. She handles the initial terror of her husband being murdered in their bedroom by the neighbor girl and then rising again and trying to eat her. She is brave, bold, strong, and beautiful.

Both bands of heroes are admirable but in the end I give the edge to Dawn 1978. The tie breaker is Fran. She is a complex and relatable character. Terrified for herself, her unborn child, and her friends she doesn’t knuckle under and allow the men to take the lead. It’s a damn shame Gaylen didn’t continue her acting career I think we would have been better for it.



Winner: Dawn of the Dead (1978)





The Villains:



Let’s talk about which movie had the best Villains, and by villains I do not mean the zombies. To me the zombies are the setting there is nothing inherently evil or malicious about them, they just wish to feed. No when I say the villains I mean the human antagonists. If a movie was just zombies and zero human antagonism it would quickly become old and lose my attention. Neither of these movies do this, both have sufficient human conflict to add flavor and suspense.

But one does it better than the other.

In Dawn 1978 the main antagonists are a group of bikers who’ve been surviving the holocaust on the road. They introduced in the final third of the movie and make the final sequences an action packed thrill ride. The scenes between the bikers and the survivors are intense and filled with laughs and gore. The conflict is fun and it’s not great.

Sorry George.

In the Dawn 2004 the main human vs. human conflict takes place between the initial survivors (Kenneth, Anna, André, Luda, and Michael) and the leader of the three surviving Mall security guards CJ. CJ’s deputies (Bart and Terry) are more or less involved in the conflict but in the end the friction is all about CJ.

Let me stick this out there… CJ is the best character in either movie.

Now before you start hurling things at me allow me to explain. When we first meet CJ he’s the stereotypical American good old boy. He claims he’s willing to kill the survivors if they don’t obey him, he has faith in America’s ability to handle the situation, and he does his best to mask his terror with a grating bravado.

It’s all a smokescreen.

You can see the relief on CJ’s face when his gun is taken from him. He never wanted to be in charge and had only stepped into the roll because he was afraid to follow anyone else. He’s actually a decent man in a bad place and once he’s released from the Mall’s security holding cell he’s more than happy to follow orders. In the end CJ is the hero of the piece, the smartassed Midwest redneck asshole willingly sacrifices himself so his friends could get away.



Winner: Dawn of the Dead (2004)





The Endings:



It had to come down to the endings of the movies to decide this war of preferences. I could have bitched about how stupid the zombie baby was in Dawn 2004 and I could have lamented the drag in the middle of Dawn 1978. I could have talked about special effects and debated the merits of fast vs. slow zombies. (I’m considering a whole part of this series just on that sticky wicket) But really what matters most is how I feel about the final moments of each movie.

In Dawn 1978 we end with Peter and Frannie flying away into the rising sun of the dawn. It’s the perfect ending for the movie. After all of the terror and loss we are left on a positive note. If you read the synopsis above you know that originally Peter and Fran were to both commit suicide at the end but George changed it at the last minute.

A change which was for the better in my opinion.

Dawn 2004 ends with our survivors (Kenneth, Anna, Nicole, and Terry) heading off into the sunset on a boat after CJ and Michael sacrifice themselves for the greater good. I have to tell you that if the movie ended on that last shot I would call this one a draw, But it didn’t. Instead during the credits we get snippets of found footage showing the survivors crossing Lake Michigan and reaching an island which turns out to be overrun by the dead. The movies ends with the fates of the people we’d rooted for as a complete unknown.

I fucking hated that.



Winner: Dawn of the Dead 1978





The Verdict



So in the end I’d have to say that Dawn of the Dead 1978 edges out its newer iteration but it’s not a homerun. Both movies are awesome and I’m happy to watch either of them if they are on. I firmly believe that if it wasn’t for Dawn 2004 the current zombie renaissance never would have happened. But in the end Dawn 1978 was and is the better film.

Though 2004 had Andy the Sniper so… yeah, it has that going for it.





- Josh







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Can’t Well All Just Get Along… Or At Least Shut The Hell Up?

No zombies in this one. It’s been a pisser of a week so far so I need to vent. If you’re not interested in my personal life I hereby give you permission to stop reading and do something else. Maybe you get a tasty beverage and find a sexy lady or fella to spend some time with.

I don’t judge.

If you are interested then by all mean feel free to read on.



It’s been a chaotic few days both personally for me and in general for the world. For me as an individual it hasn’t been anything horrible or tragic just a lot of irritants and a few minor depressive, though normal, things.

Mainly it’s been a problem with transportation.

Karen’s car, the Cobalt, is almost fixed. Stephen (my middle son) is 90% finished rebuilding and reinstalling the engine. Weather and a serious bout of the stomach flu have been kicking him in the ass. It wouldn’t be a major problem but the car my friend and former boss Kelly gave us, and she is a fucking saint for giving it to us, burned out its fuel pump. Aging this wasn’t a big deal because we’ve had unfettered access to our oldest son Josh’s car due to his lack of desire to get a license and the money we put in to fixing it.

That was until last night.

Karen was on her way to pick me up last night when the fuel pump in my son’s car went. We were forced to push the hunk of steel and plastic into the rear parking lot of my work where it’ll remain until tomorrow when we can get cheap tow for it. It’s not supposed to be there so it’s a damn good thing the support staff at my job takes care of one another. If the management knew about it they would be threatening to have it towed… because apparently that’s what Jesus would do.

So this series of unfortunate events lead to us have to ask Stephen and his wife for rides to and from work today while Stephen replaces the fuel pump in our car. We settled that out last night and everything was solid.

That was until this morning.

Apparently while they were driving Karen to work this morning my son and daughter-in-law’s car blew a brake line and they barely made it home. That rendered all of the automobiles readily available crippled and out of commission.

Seriously, I can’t fucking write this stuff.

So that sums up the bulk of what’s been bothering me in my personal life. If you add a summer cold that I can’t seem to fucking shake, seriously I’m starting to wonder if I have the Super Flu or something, and an ungodly amount of heat and humidity then you have the trifecta of irritation.

Now to the Interwebs…

Oh internet how I love and hate you with such intensity. For me the internet id like football field filled with angry raccoons fighting over the last can of garbage. It doesn’t matter if the can is destroyed they are all determined to get their paws on it because damnit they can. In the end though the surviving raccoons only find a half devoured bowl of potato salad and some moldy bread.

Sad really.

What does this have to do with me or with the interwebs?

I wrote the following thing on my Facebook today

Just a note for all of you, if you can read this you are on my friends list. I either know you and like you, I find you interesting, I want to get to know you, or all of the above. You are all along different points on the political and religious spectrum and I respect it, I don't mind debate and it doesn't bother me if we disagree, some of you I consider really close friends even though we disagree on some serious issues. I ask only two things, the first is to respect my beliefs and opinions and second don't take it too seriously online with me, I'll discuss things but I have no wish to make it personal or be mean. We are intelligent human beings let's agree to disagree if we can't come to some common ground.

That being said if you spout hateful bullshit at me or my friends I will boot and block your ass.

Right now you are probably thinking I am either too damn sensitive or I have some real assholes for friends. To paraphrase Grandpa Simpson the answer is probably a little from column A and a little from column B. I do tend to get a bit sensitive, I’m good with it, and some of my friends can be real assholes. They know who they are and they know I love them for it, they make life interesting.

But to be fair I’m a real asshole too.

Look I just want to clarify something. I have some strong opinions and if you’ve been reading these essay’s for any length of time you know I have zero problem sharing them. But I think I need to state this very clearly so there can be no confusion.

Ready?



“I will accept your beliefs and views as your own and as valid as mine even if I strongly disagree with you because nobody has all of the answers. But in the words of Wil Wheaton, don’t be a dick. To which I will also add don’t be a piece of shit and hurt people.”



I’m not wussing out and trying to care some middle ground. There are views which hurt no one that I find reprehensible but I can live and let live as long as people are not being hurt.

You hate the gays, the blacks, the brown people, and the women? Fine, you’re a jerk and I won’t try and change your mind but if you start trying to hurt people I’ll be on your ass… and not in the fun way either.

Life is too short for me to do more than express my opinion and move on. I’m not your parent, your spouse, your teacher, or your clergy. If you can’t find your own way out of your ass it’s not my problem.

This doesn’t apply to civilized discussion.

If you want to have mature discourse, and my idea of mature involves a lot of curse words and friendly name calling, that’s great. But if you’re gonna be a jackass don’t waste my time. In fact unfriend me online and please go away. If you are reading this it’s probably safe to assume this doesn’t apply to you.





-Josh

You’re The Inspiration 9 “Shoot For The Head Part 2”

The Films Of George Romero

I’m back!

I know you’re shocked that you’re getting the next installment of the zombie inspiration essays as opposed to some bitchy emo tirade. So am I, I fully expected have something stuck in my craw by this point that I had to get out or I’d start randomly punching people smaller than myself. But no I’m feeling relatively centered and all I can think about right now is the living dead.

With being said I give you my personal rundown of George Romero’s Zombie and Zombieesque library. These aren’t reviews. I’m going to be talking about what I liked and didn’t like about them but as with most things in the zombie genre I feel a little too close to the source material to be objective.

One other thing, while the theme of this series is the Zombie I am treating the term in the broadest possible way. I consider the Infected in the 28 Days series and the monsters in The Omega Man and I Am Legend to be in the same vein as zombies.

So please bear that in mind as you read these and enjoy!





Zombies are fictional creatures, typically depicted as mindless, reanimated corpses with a hunger for human flesh, regularly encountered in horror and fantasy themed works. Some depictions are inspired by Haitian folklore, while others, like the ones in George A. Romero's film Night of the Living Dead, do not have that same direct connection. Zombies have a complex literary heritage, with antecedents ranging from Richard Matheson and H. P. Lovecraft to Mary Shelley's Frankenstein drawing on European folklore of the undead. The popularity of zombies in movies has led to them sometimes having been taken out of their usual element of horror and thrown into other genres, for example the comedy film Shaun of the Dead. The "zombie apocalypse" concept, in which the civilized world is brought low by a global zombie infestation, has become a staple of modern popular art.



-Wikipedia



George A. Romero didn’t invent zombies.

Yes I know that may be heresy to my fellow zombie fanatics but unfortunately it’s the stone cold truth. There were zombies in many forms before the release of 1968’s immortal and unkillable Night of the Living Dead. In we want to be completely honest Night was inspired by an earlier work of fiction, the novella I Am Legend by Richard Matheson. I will be talking about Legend when I get to the “Zombies In Literature” part of this series.



(Not the firm title and I reserve the right to change it and anything else I feel like in my work whenever the fuck I feel like it)



There were also zombie type movies before Night such as White Zombie, Revolt of the Zombies, and Last Man on Earth (the first film version of I Am Legend but not the last). But none of these were the Romero Type Zombies we’ve all come to know and love. For me and the vast majority of zombie fans George is where our Fandom begins and even if we’ve moved in other directions he is the first prophet of our future flesh eating overlords.

So without further adieu we get on with the movies.





Night of the Living Dead 1968 (NIGHT)



I talked about my experiences with NIGHT in the first part of this series but there are few more things I want to touch on before moving forward into Georges later work. We’ll make this short.

It has often said NIGHT is at its core a cold war movie with Ben representing and Mr. Cooper representing the left and right forces pulling at the fabric of the United States at the time. Of course the dead represent the communist menace but by the time I became a fan none of that was really relevant.

Night also addressed racism in a very real and direct way. Ben was black and the ostensible hero of the piece while Mr. Cooper, the villain, was white. The great tragedy being the inability of the cultural enemies to work together thus ensuring their mutual destruction. That both of them had half of the answers to the problem always leaves me screaming at the screen as the dead are smashing at the boarded window but Ben and Cooper can’t stop fighting each other.

In the post 9-11 world the issues poked t in the movie once more became relevant. The issues of self reliance, self defense, and fear of “Those Other People” have been thrust back into the forefront of the American experience. If anything its more significant in this day and age where the monolithic Soviet Union has been replaced by an entire religion as the thing American’s fear.

NIGHT gives a complex story wrapped in the skin of a rocking horror movie. There is a reason it shattered the paradigm and changed the genre forever. NIGHT did it right and it holds up to this very day.





Dawn of the Dead 1978 (DAWN)



DAWN is my number on single favorite movie of all time. The first time I saw it was at my great uncle Jerry’s house. We were visiting and he slipped a tape in the VCR. Uncle Jerry was the cool uncle. He always had the best electronics and toys. He taught me how to drive a speedboat and it may have been at his house where I first saw a girl naked.

May!

If you’ve seen the original DAWN you know it opens not with the dead or with unsuspecting people but in a Philadelphia news studio in the midst of the fall of civilization. To this day those initial scenes as the structure of American life falls apart still have he ability to rattle me.

Of course the heart of DAWN, other than some truly awesome zombie scenes, is the lampooning of the consumer culture of the late 1970’s. This might actually be more on the nose now than it was when the movie was first made. The survivors clear and fortify a mall in which they spend months surviving.

And surviving is the key word.

Sure Peter, Steven, and Fran are safe inside of the mall (Poor Roger bough the farm during the clearing of the mall) but they aren’t living. You’d think they’d be happy because they’re safe and sound. They have plenty to eat and drink. And for some damn reason power never shuts. Yes there is some vague reference to being on a nuclear grid in the novelization but in the movie everyone just accepts that the power stays on.

While the humans are trapped like rats in a cage the dead have the freedom of the out of doors. Yet the dead only wat what the living have and the living only want what the dead have.

In the end two of the heroes, Fran and Peter because poor stupid Steven couldn’t keep his anger in check, escape the mall in their fuel deficient helicopter Fran had insisted she learn to fly following an invasion by a roaming biker gang. The side effect of the actions of these agents of chaos is to give both the living and the dead exactly what they really wanted all along.

Plus we have a pie fight with the dead… SCORE!!!

DAWN made me want to write zombie fiction. It was DAWN that inspired my first zombie fan fictions in which the heroes won the battle for the mall and weren’t forced to abandon their fortress. It wasn’t until years later that I realized they HAD to get out of the mall or it would be the end of them as surely if the zombies had gotten them in Philadelphia.





Day of the Dead 1985 (DAY)



DAY showed us for the first time in a Romero flick a modern American city overrun by the living dead. That the city is Fort Meijer’s Florida which at the time had one of the largest communities of retired people in the country is so filled with delicious irony that I may explode from eating all of it. Okay, I don’t eat irony but when this was pointed out to me it blew my mind.

George, I love you, you magnificent bastard!

Where NIGHT was about the red menace and DAWN was about consumer society DAY is all about the growing power of the government in the lives of Americans. I rewatched DAY about a month ago and t scared the shit out of me. It wasn’t the zombies this time, although when the land in the town looking for survivors the horde still makes my heart skip a few beats. No it was the structure, it was the way freedoms were curbed and the non-military people were relegated to the near level of serfs.

Almost thirty years later this movie is eerily prescient.

DAY is about a group of scientists and soldiers living in an underground base on an island off of the coast of Florida. The situation on the island is extreme. The scientists are fighting a losing battle trying to breakdown the cause of the outbreak while the most senior and brilliant of them has completely lost his mind and has decided instead of fighting the dead they need to be domesticated. Moral amongst the soldiers is almost nonexistent and upon the death of their commanding officer, his death is never really explained and there is a suggestion he was killed by the man who replaces him.

Captain Barnes if the biggest son of a bitch in any Romero movie, yeah I said it and I’m going to stand by it. The man is a vile human being. He threatens murder and rape. He uses his power to get exactly what he wants from the terrified people in the bunker. To him the barrels of his guns are al of the authority he needs.

The star of the movie is Bub.

Bub is a zombie trained by the insane head scientist. Over the course of the movie the doctor actually manages to domesticate the zombie who develops a nearly dog like level of affection and attachment to the crazy old man/ It’s no wonder I cheer every time Bub hunts down and kills Barnes after Barnes murders the scientist.

In the end, much like in DAWN, a few of the living escape in their helicopter. This time it’s the chopper pilot, the radio operator, and the lone female scientist. Unlike in DAWN however we get a final scene of the chopper and the survivor’s safe on an isolated tropical island.

While not my favorite of the Romero movies DAY may very well be the best made. The story is unique for its time, the production values are high the acting and effects are top notch, and the dark feel and atmosphere of the movie is down right chilling.





Night of the Living Dead 1990 (NIGHT 1990)



I am NOT a fan of remakes, especially when it’s a movie I love. For every Rob Zombie’s Halloween you get a hundred Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes. When I heard that they were remaking Night of the Living Dead I was 14 years old and in the first real stages of becoming a solid writer. On one hand I was excited, in the years between Day of the Dead and the Night remake we lived in a universe bereft of serious zombie movies. The best we had were the Return of the Living Dead films. These were ostensibly horror comedies and while they are really good they just never filled the hole in my zombie heart.

But I loved the second Return movie a lot!



(I’ll be touching on the Return movies, specifically the first two, in a future installment)



NIGHT 1990 was produced by George Romero and directed by the king of gore Tom Savini. While the story is essentially the same as the original Savini’s take brings new freshness. Where NIGHT 1968 was a dark terrifying tale of survival horror NIGHT 1990 was fun.

And that is a good thing.

If the remake had been the zombie equivalent of Gus Van Zant’s Psycho I would have demanded my money back even though technically the theater shouldn’t have sold me the ticket in the first place. But NIGHT 1990 is and was a rocking horror action movie.

The cast didn’t hurt either.

Tony Todd is a genre god. Cast as Ben in NIGHT 1990 he is best known for being The Candy Man. Not to mention the dozens, maybe hundreds, of other supporting and starring roles to which he’s brought a strength and gravitas most actors wish they could must once much less over and over again. Pair him Patricia Tallman, who would later go on to star in Babylon 5, as Barbara and the board was set for something special.

In the end NIGHT 1990 was a love letter to the fans, and we were lucky to get it.





Land of the Dead 2005 (LAND)



We had to go 20 years between Romero zombie movies. Just thinking about that is making my head spin. I had to go 20 years without a zombie movie from the master. Oh there were good movies such as Shaun of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead 2004, and 28 Days Later and we will talk about them. But in the end what I wanted was to hear Georges voice again.

I was not disappointed.

There are diehard fans of George’s work who hate Land of the Dead. I am not one of them. So many people flooded the internet with hate toward the movie that a lot of people still think the movie is bad even though they’ve never seen it.

LAND is about the world a decade after the rise of the dead and the fall of human civilization. Dennis Hopper plays Kaufman the ruler of a walled city holding out against the hordes of the hungry dead. In this world human like is cheap and the gulf between the common people living on the streets and tenements of the city and the rich upper class who live in the ivory tower of Fiddlers Green is massive.

In the build up for the movie George talked about how it was about the homeless problem in America. The people in the city venture forth every night to scavenge for supplies from the dead town and cities. In these excursions they treat the zombies not as a threat but an irritant and in many cases as sport. But the depredations of the rich versus the poor, especially between Hoppers character and John Leguizamo’s character Chollo, are a serious smack in the face.

LAND get’s panned by the “True” zombie fan because of its high production values and an emphasis on character development as opposed to gore. But you know what the movie holds up. Forget it’s a Romero movie and just look at it as a zombie movie… it’s good, period.

Final word, it’s best if you don’t look at LAND as the fourth in the dead series. It’s actually the final film of a new trilogy even though it’s the first one made. I will explain this after I finish my breakdown of the flicks.





Diary of the Dead 2007 (DIARY)



I need to say this right up on Front Street. I like the “Found Footage” genre of movies. I liked The Blair Witch Project and I loved Cloverfield. So it’s impossible for me to be unbiased when it come to the way this movie was shot. For the record I think it’s the best of the genre.

Okay, moving on.

DIARY is the reboot to the series. It moves us back to the first day of the rising of the dead with a focus on how the government controls the traditional media and outlets such as YouTube serve as the main conduit for information. In the movie a group of college film students are on a shoot in the wilderness when the dead rise and they have to find family, friends, and safety.

Sigh… I like DIARY but in the end I think it’s the weakest of the Romero films. There are too many things going on and too many characters for me to connect with them. I like it, I’ve watched it several times, and I will continue to watch it. It’s not a bad zombie movie it’s just not the best in the genre.

Although Samuel the deaf Amish farmer is hardcore!





Survival of the Dead 2009 (SURVIVAL)



SURVIVAL is the latest, but I hope not the last, Romero zombie film. In this one George goes back to a small story based around a few central characters. In the movie a small island off the east coast of the United States has survived the rise of the dead and is split into two factions. One side wants to eliminate the dead and cleanse the island of their presence. The other side thinks the dead can be rehabilitated and once more made into useful residents.

Of course this does not end well.

In the end the island collapses under the weight of the dead. Everyone who doesn’t escape the spit of land settle back into continuing their feud but now as the very dead they were fighting over.

I like SURVIVAL. It’s a rocking little movie and worthy addition to the cannon of Romero films. It’s not a great movie and the lack of a real budget rears its ugly head in a few scenes can be a little jarring but it’s a fun watch.





Two Trilogies



And now we need to talk about the idea that there are two distinct Romero trilogies at play here. Obviously NIGHT, DAWN, and DAY are a complete body of work and I don’t feel like they are missing anything. The three movie move from point to point b to point c without missing a step. That final on the tropical island is the perfect ending. It leaves us with a sense of hope for these people.

The newest three movies are an out of sequence trilogy linked by a single character played by Alan Van Sprang. Follow me on this for a second. In DIARY he plays the renegade commander of a National Guard Unit that robs the kids in the RV of all their supplies but is decent enough not to take their vehicle of hurt them. In SURVIVAL he commands a much smaller group of soldiers living on the road and off the remnants of the fallen civilization. He is one of the only people who make it through the holocaust on the Island. Finally in LAND he is one of the commanders in the Army of the Green and dies when the dead overrun the humans beachhead on the other side of the river.

If you question that these movies are not worthy of the name Romero watch them in that order. I promise you it’s a whole new experience. You might not love them but they are a much better watch.





Conclusions & Final Thoughts



I wouldn’t love the zombie genre if not for George Romero and I’m pretty that goes for a lot of you. For that matter I think it’s safe to say that there wouldn’t be a modern zombie genre without him. He is the godfather of all that came after. George took several tangentially related threads and wove them into a rope of mythology an entire movement has been able to hang from.

I don’t want to meet George. Like Stephen King and Kevin Smith I consider him one of my creative inspirations. There was another man I had on that list from the age of 7 or so but I actually met him and it didn’t end well. In the end I think it’s best to keep your heroes at arm’s length.





Next time we’ll talk about the non Romero zombie movies. Until then stock up on canned goods, bottled water, ammunition, and remember if they come scratching at your doors and windows shot for the head!

Unless they are Girls Scouts or Jehovah’s Witnesses… well unless they are Girl Scouts at least.





-Josh

You’re The Inspiration 8 “Shoot For The Head Part 1”

The Overview



Alright deep breathe. This is the one we’ve all been waiting for. This is the only thing which could top Star Trek as a creative influence in my life. This is the one that has changed every aspect of my life and the way I look at the world. This is the one I can’t stop dreaming about and this is the one that won’t give up space in my head.

They aren’t renting space… they’ve moved in and built a home.

Let’s talk about Zombies!

I know if you’ve been a fan of my work or have known me for any length of time then you know I’m a zombie freak. I live, breathe, eat, drink, and sleep the living dead. I really thought that once I’d told my zombie tale that I might be able to move to other things and be done with them.

I was wrong.

After my first zombie trilogy was told, The Shores of the Dead, I moved on to new things but the dead still called to me. Since then I have worked on short zombie tales and a young adult zombie serial called Summer Camp of the Dead. I have recently accepted that the zombie genre will never leave me, the best I will be able to do is set it aside so I can work on other things.

This string of essays are, the nature of the subject, going to be long. I will be covering all the aspects of zombie’s in the media that have influenced me. But before we get to that we need an origin story, a brief rundown of how this all started.

But wait a second.

There is no way I will be able to cover everything. Doing that would be the work of a lifetime and I have too many irons in the fire to even consider that undertaking. I will do my best to cover all of the zombie centric things that were or are important to me. I will also be relying on some short bits from Wikipedia to give background information. These quotes will be placed in boxes in order to signify they are NOT my work.



In this first essay we will concentrate on the beginning of my obsession with the living dead. There are two incidents which made me a zombie fan. One of them will be obvious and the other might surprise you. So sit back and get ready… things are gonna get weird. Now with that out of the way let’s get down to the gory bits. It won’t be pretty but it will be awesome!





The Genesis 1



From Wikipedia

Night of the Living Dead is a 1968 American independent horror film directed by George A. Romero, starring Duane Jones, Judith O'Dea and Karl Hardman. It premiered on October 1, 1968, and was completed on a US$114,000 budget. The film became a financial success, grossing $12 million domestically and $18 million internationally. It has been a cult classic ever since. Night of the Living Dead was heavily criticized at its release owing to explicit content, but eventually garnered critical acclaim and has been selected by the Library of Congress for preservation in the National Film Registry as a film deemed "culturally, historically or aesthetically significant." The film has entered the public domain due to an error by the distributor.

The story follows characters Ben (Duane Jones), Barbra (Judith O'Dea), and five others trapped in a rural farmhouse in Pennsylvania which is attacked by unnamed "living dead" monsters, drawing on earlier depictions in popular culture of zombies. Night of the Living Dead was the basis of five subsequent Living Dead films (1978–2010) also directed by Romero, and has inspired remakes.



When I was 10 years old my father let me watch a movie. It was Halloween night and everyone was exhausted from trick or treating and gorged on candy. It was about ten at night and I was just about ready to doze off for the evening when my dad and my step brother came in and changed the channel. I think it was channel 20 (one of the 2 independent Detroit UHF stations) because back then they would do “Shocktober” hosted by Count Shockula.

“You going to love this,” my father said as he set down on the couch next to me.

As the black and white movie began to play on the small screen I quickly became bored with it. That all changed when I heard something emanating from the TV.



“They’re coming to get you Barbara!”



Immediately my attention was captured and for the next 2 hours, although it felt simultaneously like 2 minutes and 20 hours, I was a prisoner. I didn’t sleep a wink that night. Every shadow, every sound out in the windy Michigan night, and every creek in the house was one of the living dead coming to get me.

I was terrified.

I was an addict.

It is safe to say Night of the Living Dead changed my life more than any other movie, book, or television show in my life. That simple, low budget, black and white horror show has buried itself deep in my gray matter and I don’t think it can ever be dislodged.

I have watched Night of the Living Dead more than 100 times. I’ve owned it on multiple platforms and have even watched the horrible colorized version from the 1980’s.

Let’s bite the bullet, the movie looks like shit and it drags in a few spots. The acting is spotty, but Judith O’Dea (Barbara) and Duane Jones (Ben) are phenomenal. Despite, or maybe because of, the movies flaws it has a dark grittiness that embeds it under the viewers skin and changes their perceptions forever.

This film inspired more short stories, some good some so bad I will have them burned when I die, than anything else. It has also lead to more sleepless nights than any other movie I’ve ever watched. I can’t tell you how many times a tree moving outside a bedroom window lead to near bed wetting and sleeping with a baseball bats. To this day the first thing I do when entering a new place is scope out the defensive options and escape routes always with an eye to zombies.

When I was a kid family members got really tire of my zombie obsession real quick. There were days when all I could think of were the dead and what the world around me would be like if the dead rose up and tried to eat all of us. It’s stayed with me all of these years.

Now for the other, perhaps surprising, beginning of my zombie fixation. You can laugh as much as you want about this one but if you are my age or a little older this might resonate with you just a little bit.





The Genesis 2



From Wikipedia

Michael Jackson's Thriller is an American 13-minute music video for the song of the same name released on December 2, 1983. It was directed by John Landis, who also co-wrote the screenplay with Michael Jackson.

It was MTV's first world premiere video. Voted as the most influential pop music video of all time, Thriller proved to have a profound effect on popular culture, and was named "a watershed moment for the [music] industry" for its unprecedented merging of filmmaking and music. Guinness World Records listed it in 2006 as the "most successful music video", selling over nine million copies. In 2009, the video was inducted into the National Film Registry by the Library of Congress, the first music video to ever receive this honor, for being “culturally, historically or aesthetically” significant. The track was also listed at number one on "The Top 10 Halloween Songs" by Billboard.

Costarring with Jackson was former Playboy centerfold Ola Ray. The video was choreographed by Michael Peters (who had worked with the singer on his prior hit "Beat It"), and Michael Jackson. The video also contains incidental music by film music composer Elmer Bernstein, who had previously worked with Landis on An American Werewolf in London. The video (like the song) contains a spoken word performance by horror film veteran Vincent Price. Rick Baker assisted in prosthetics and makeup for the production. "Thriller" was the third and final video for the Thriller album. The red jacket that Jackson wore was designed by John Landis' wife Deborah Landis to make him appear more "virile".

To qualify for an Academy Award as a short subject, the film was shown in a theatrical screening along with the 1940 Disney animated feature Fantasia, in December 1983; the video however failed to earn an Academy Award nomination.





The first time I saw Michael Jacksons Thriller video I hid behind a chair. I cowered behind a battered and beat up recliner while Michael Jackson danced and sang his way across the small screen.

Yeah I know that sounds crazy but I was in second grade and when it got to the zombie scene I nearly wet myself. Over the months whenever I was in a home where they had MTV, hey we still had rabbit ears and a 25 inch black and white TV in my house, I would watch and wait for that fucking video to come on.

The makeup was amazing, the zombies were terrifying, and Vincent Price made me want to hide and whimper for my mommy when he started speaking. The video has earned its reputation as one of the best ever made.

It wasn’t until I was in the seventh grade that I saw the john Landis’s amazing making of featurette. It gave us a look at the complicated vision behind the video and the effort needed to put out a project of that quality.

It also made me never want to be a film maker.

There was brief time in my childhood when the idea of being a movie maker seemed like the direction my life was taking. I researched it and played around with the primitive video cameras of the day. I was within inches of dropping my writing in preference of film making when I saw the making of video for Thriller. My 7th grade ELC (it was my schools smart kids class) teacher showed it to us. When I was done viewing it I knew I would have been a shitty film maker, better than Uwe Boll but not as good as Michael Bay. So really in the end John Landis (An excellent film maker) made me a writer… without dropping a helicopter on me and some Asian child actors.

And that’s the end of the beginning.



And that’s the end of part 1. Next time we will be talking about the Romero zombie films, not just a few but the entire catalog and what I gleaned from each of them. This isn’t going to be a sprint more of a marathon so sit back and enjoy the ride Boils and Ghouls… I know I will.





-Josh

“Getting Unstuck from the Middle”

Before you read the title of this essay and think this is going to be yet another emo bitch session let me assure you that while this another emo bitch session it’s one made while I am actually feeling pretty good about my life. So yes while I am going to be whining and complaining about so facets of my life, call it what it is I’ll be throwing a pity party yet again, it’s all done with an eye towards things actually being better despite the doom and gloom.

Alright let’s do this thing!



It took me a long time to realize in order to feel happy you need to occasionally feel bad. I don’t mean you should feel miserable. Unless you are some kiddy touching puppy kicking asshole I don’t think you deserve to feel miserable. If you are one of those monsters please throw yourself off the nearest bridge while holding a bowling ball. But those fuckers aside everyone needs to feel a little bad in order appreciate when things are good. I mean how else do you determine good and bad?



NOTE: I am not speaking of people struggling to live with depression and other chronic mental difficulties. Please if you are one of those people (I count myself in your numbers) seek professional help. I know it can be scary to admit you are not in charge of your own thoughts and emotions but it is almost impossible to conquer it on your own. It’s not a sign of weakness to admit you need help it’s a sign of courage.



So I guess you are wondering what has brought these feelings on aren’t you. Well even if you’re not I’m going to tell you anyway so if you’re not interested just close this page and go look for your favorite wank site. I promise I won’t be mad, fuck I’d rather be pulling it myself.

Are you still here?

Good, glad you picked me over YouPorn and Grindr.

So the first thing on my mind is my job. No not how much I hate my job and want to gnaw my foot off in order to escape the monotony. What id bothering me is the real job, the writing job.

Sit down I haven’t lost my mind, just listen.

I have been kicking out the wordage like a fucking champion lately. I’m not claiming to be a dynamo or anything but I’ve never produced like this in my entire life. It feels amazing. It’s like being stoned without the cotton mouth and constant desire for Taco Bell.

Not that I know what that feels like…

I have felt more like a real writer in the last ten day than I have in the last two years. I am not complaining about this at all. What I am sitting here bitching and complaining about is the financial reality. I’m not losing money, in fact my income increases steadily every month. I am expanding into new outlets and platforms as fast as I can and upping my game every day, and that’s the problem. I am outstripping my ability to generate revenue. I know the income channels will catch up and in the long run this is a excellent situation to be stuck in… but damnit it’s frustrating.

And now for the other issue taking up space in my skull.

I miss my best friend and I am ashamed to admit I’ve been allowing myself to feel bad about it. I don’t mean bad in the sense that I’m a little depressed and feeling sorry for myself. I mean I have spent a few weeks feeling like I’ve been abandoned by the people I love and that I am without friends. Before you start yelling at me allow me to head off the remarks.

Deep Breath…

I am well aware that I am being a whiny little bitch reveling in self pity and allowing myself to be the selfish child I was before I started taking control of my life. I get it and I accept it, but the only way I am going to be able to deal with it is to share it.

My best friends are currently on vacation with some of their other friends. It’s a vacation my wife and I went on with them in 2010. That vacation was the last good time I had before spiraling into the worst depression of my life and nearly ending my marriage. My friends go on this trip every year and I am always a little bit jealous. This is one hundred percent my own issue, my friends are real friends who’ve had my back even when I thought I was alone. But still every year I feel bad when they go on the trip.

This year I had an epiphany.

I am a really bad friend.

My best friend in this entire world has been there for me in every facet of my life. It didn’t matter how hard his life was and how miserable he might have been he was there, in my corner, giving me nothing but love and friendship without ever asking for anything.

I have had the unmitigated gall to be jealous and feel hurt.

Sometimes I just need my fucking ass kicked.

I am actually happy and I have a really good life. Yeah there are problems with family members. Yes there are issues with finances, automobiles, and future places to live. But my life is pretty god damn good. I have my family, I have my career, and I have this man in my life who is more my brother than my friend. He is more my brother than one who shares my blood. I love him more than almost any other human being on the face of this earth and I have had the nerve to feel ignored.



I AM HAPPY MY BROTHER HAS A LIFE THAT MAKES HIM HAPPY!



There I said it. Eventually you have to grow up and it doesn’t happen all at once. This week I took another step toward being a better person. I will never be a perfect persona and I will probably never be as great as my brother… but I hope one day I’ll be a good person.





-Josh

“Father of Mine”

Have you ever had the feeling there was something you needed to remember yet were unable to put your finger on it? I woke up this morning feeling like I’d been dreaming something important but once my eyes were open I couldn’t recall it. I have been on a foul mood all day and it took me quite a while to realize what was causing it.

As of this writing and posting tomorrow will be Fathers Day 2014.

First and foremost I am a father. My children are the most important things in my life. It doesn’t matter to me if I physically created them or not all six of my children occupy the top shelf in my heart. In that regard tomorrow will be fun. My kids are taking me out to dinner for father’s day and I am anticipating the normal awesome time we have when we all get together. There is nothing I love more than having all of my children around me.

I am also a son.

I love my dad. I don’t care if people who have been keeping up with my Journal in all of its many and varied forms think I’ve been a bad son because in a way I have been. But I’ve been no worse a son than he has been a father. We have both fucked up the family dynamic and I am not sure if we will ever be able to repair it.

Let me say one more time before any of you start judging me, I LOVE MY DAD.

Two years ago I did my A Cautious Descent Into Respectability series of essays. These essays were written on the advice of my Doctor who said if I was going to have any hope in my battle with depression I needed to start talking about my life and the trauma I’d experienced. For me it was wonderful, unburdening my mind in conjunction with medication has made all of the difference and I am now celebrating two years with no serious suicidal thoughts and feelings.

Of course some people were less than happy.

Let me put this out there right now before I start hearing the usual behind the scenes family bullshit. I fucked up. I should have warned people of what I was going to be doing. I never should have used my brothers real name in that ONE essay. But I will NEVER be sorry for having done it and if you can’t accept that then just go your own way.

There is a reason I never mention my father’s family by name. By this I mean my dad, stepmother, middle brother, and my sister in law. It’s not because I am afraid of the threatened lawsuit or their bullshit condemnation of me and mine. It’s not because I am secretly hoping everything will go back t the way it was, I know my family all I would have to do is grovel for a little bit and all would be forgiven. No the reason is because I know I am somewhat culpable for the current situation and only wish to minimize any further damage.

But no, other than with my Dad, I have zero desire to fix anything.

Since the falling out my father and I have spoken maybe a dozen times and never once about why he’s mad and hurt. Oh I have my theories as to why he’s turtled the fuck up. He’s mad about my beef with his wife, he thinks I disrespected her and so he chose her over me. I don’t even blame him for that, she’s his wife and they love each other I get it and I won’t condemn him or say he should have chosen her over me despite the reasons for our issues. I won’t go into it but suffice it to say I don’t give a flying fuck what she thinks or feels. He’s mad that I aired family business in a public forum because that’s a massive no-no in my family. But mostly he’s mad because as far as I’m concerned my brother doesn’t exist anymore. Dad took his side without ever even speaking with me.

Yes I know how small and petty I sound.

Yes I know how juvenile it looks.

Yes I am aware sibling rivalry is as old as the human race… maybe older.

I don’t care. I know these are very likely the main reasons my father has cut ties but there is one other reason I feel bears mentioning. My father has never been very comfortable with me. I’m not saying he doesn’t love/like me I mean there aspects of Josh Hilden he has never been able to deal with head on. My father and my brother are both highly skilled when it comes to manly things they enjoy (auto mechanics, home repair, fishing). I am compete rubbish when it comes to those things and I do not enjoy them. They are both sports fans, Josh not so much. But there is one thing which drove a spike when I was 16.

I tried to kill myself the summer between junior and senior years of high school. I am not rehashing that story again if you are really interest I refer you back to my older essays. During my stay in a mental health facility I told my dad I was Bisexual, he was the first family member I ever told and his response was to pretend like it never happened. So suffice it to say when I came out he was not happy. He never said anything but I got a fucking earful from his wife. Some people need to learn once they say something the damage is done.

To this day dad has NEVER talked to me about it. I want to say I don’t blame him and I understand that he is from an older time and that it’s not fair to expect him to accept it. I really want to but the fact is I am his son and I think if our places were reversed I’d handle it better.

So tomorrow is father’s day and I am at a crossroads, in the two years since all of this shit started my father has not called me once. Every phone call has been initiated by me and I am really fucking sick of it. I’m not calling him tomorrow. I am done being the one who makes the efforts no matter how small. I’m just fucking done.

I am sure my dad, his wife, and my brother dip into my journal just to see what’s going on in my life. I couldn’t care less. I make none of it restricted and I block none of them from anything they can read anything I write and feel any way they damn please. I am sure as this is read there will be cursing and gnashing of teeth and other such bitching.

Good.

If you, and let me make this crystal by you I mean dad I don’t ever want to hear from the rest of you, are reading this don’t call me. If you read this and really want to talk wait until my birthday or at least a few weeks. I’m pissed and I’m hurt and I have no time for bullshit.

This is the last essay I ever plan on making about my father’s family of my middle brother unless something unforeseen happens. I’m going to be 38 in two months. I’ve been with my wife for 18 ½ years and I have 6 children. I have my own family, my own career, and if I’m not worth making an effort for that’s fine.





-Josh