Thom S. Rainer's Blog, page 80

Seven Sentences We Never Expected to Hear in Churches in 2020

I can only imagine how we would have responded in 2019 if someone had told us we needed to be prepared not to gather in-person in worship services for several months in 2020. Indeed, if we had been given a glimpse of this crazy year ahead of time, we would have thought the world had gone crazy.

It probably has. 

Look at these seven sentences we hear in churches today. We could have never predicted them. 

“We need to decide if we are going to require masks in church.” If I had heard this sentence would be common in churches, I probably would have wondered if we are having mandatory costume parties in 2020. With the different masks used today, maybe we are.
“We can’t take the offering anymore.” Really? I think many leaders would have freaked out if they heard financial support would become dependent on digital giving. Probably many more would have been surprised how many members were willing to move to digital giving.
“We can no longer have the stand and greet time.” This issue was contentious in many churches before 2020. While many churches held tenaciously to this tradition, it was fading overall. But, imagine if we outright banned it in churches. That has happened for the most part. In case you’re wondering, I’m really okay with this development.
“We need to measure our streaming views over 30 seconds.” For sure, a few churches were doing live streaming services prior to 2020, but they were a distinct minority in number. I don’t think any of us anticipated that streaming views would become a common church metric.
“We need to arrange our worship center seating to accommodate social distancing.” Prior to 2020, I would have thought social distancing was only something we introverts practiced. Now it is something church leaders plan on a regular basis. 
“We need to move all of our small groups to meet on Zoom.” If most church members had heard this statement in 2019, they may have wondered if small groups would be in some drug-induced state. Zoom? What is that?
“We will no longer visit church members in the hospital.” This development in 2020 is painful both to those confined to the hospital and to those in the church who really want to care for these members. It is indeed one of the tragedies of the pandemic.

Who would have predicted the articulation of these sentences in churches prior to 2020? It has been a strange year. It has been a painful year. 

What unexpected sentences would you add?

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Do You Know Your Leader?

Each leader has their own tendencies, idiosyncrasies, and expectations. One of my leaders hated popcorn, so, of course, at Christmas I gave him a metal bin of popcorn. Thom Rainer finds the word “interesting” obligatory, so I often find myself trying to find another word. 

When you are not the leader, you must know your leader. In many ways it is like marriage. The more you communicate and seek to understand, the stronger the relationship will become. As your leader feels heard, he or she will be more open to feedback. When your leader sees action, you are increasing the trust between the two of you. 

Here are four easy questions you can ask yourself about your leader. In most cases these are questions you can ask your leader directly (just add “Is my leader a” to the beginning of every prompt below).

Introvert or Extrovert? People often mistake this question with someone’s ability to interact with people. Both Thom and I are introverts, and both of us can interact with people. But people drain us, and we work more effectively on tasks alone. Leaders who are extroverts are energized by conversation and enjoy a collaborative process to get work done. One way this impacts work is that I try to schedule short meetings. My emails to him are task-oriented and clear.

Micro-manager or Macro-manager? Micro-managers need to know the details and need to know tasks 1 to 100 have been completed in any given project. Macro leaders want to guide the process and delegate the details to their team. I am a macro-manager, but I have to know the details. As I translate them to Thom, I have to simplify information so he can quickly understand and make decisions. I am expected to know the details if he wants to ask further questions.

Visionary or Executive? Visionary leaders see a preferred future based on problems they discern or felt needs. Executives see problems based on a previously stated vision. An executive seeks to connect new methods and make mission statements relevant. Thom is a visionary leader wanting to provide a way forward. He gets excited about new opportunities. My role is more of an executive. 

Teacher or Coach? Leaders who are teachers have proven methods they want to pass along. A coach’s role is to place you in the right spot on the team and give feedback on performance. 

While every leader has a bent or default, it is important to note that every leader must be able to recognize and adapt to the needs of their team and the situation. Your effectiveness will increase as you get to know who is leading you better. It is vital to the health of your church or organization to know your leader when you aren’t the leader.

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When Volunteers Aren’t Ready to Return

Volunteer recruitment is always a challenge, but the difficulty has increased as we come out of a pandemic. In most churches, about 50% of attenders are returning. Many who return are still not ready to serve in ways that put them in close proximity to others, especially children. Many are weary from changes in their professional and personal lives. Many have simply gotten out of the habit of commitments following a time when many obligations were paused. 

Yet our churches and ministries are reopening, as they need to. How do we handle reopening when so many people aren’t ready to volunteer?

Pray. This is not just a Sunday School answer. We are dealing with spiritual issues and our number one go-to has to be to ask God for His help and His wisdom. Pray for those who are hurting or fearful. Pray for those who are willing. Pray for God to show you His path in equipping the church to serve.
Be gracious and understanding. Due to the reasons mentioned above and a thousand possible others, you and your team will be told “no” a lot. When church members aren’t ready to serve, respond with much grace. Support their decision and refrain from judgment. How you respond now can greatly impact their willingness to serve in the future.  

 

Reopen in stages. If only 50% of your congregation has returned, be cautious about trying to reopen 100% of your ministries right away. Consider what is most essential to open first. Some churches reopened elementary ministry first because they are easier to social distance and can function with fewer numbers of volunteers. Some churches open nursery first because the little ones have a harder time attending service with their families. Determine a step-by-step approach for your reopening rather than try to do everything at once.


Restructure. We are all tired of hearing about our “new normal.” However, your ministry is going to look differently in this season. View this as an opportunity to get creative and do something different. In our church, we have always had an hour of kids’ Sunday School and an hour of kids’ worship. In this season, we are only doing kids’ small groups for elementary. Kids are encouraged to attend worship with their parents and we have adapted our services to include them. What can you do differently so that you can still provide effective ministry, yet adapt to having fewer volunteers?


Rotate volunteers. I have always been an advocate of having consistency in your volunteer base as much as possible. Having the same volunteers serve in the same capacity each week provides the most stability. However, in this season I have had to learn to compromise here. People aren’t ready to “all in” commit. However, try offering lower commitment levels such as once or twice a month. Work your way back to consistency. 


Make the hard asks. Sometimes we feel bad asking people to serve, especially when we know that everyone’s life situation is a bit tumultuous right now. We may feel like we are bothering people or guilting them into serving. Don’t lose sight of the fact that you are truly asking them to participate in kingdom work. 

 

Stay in contact with those who aren’t coming back yet. Your former volunteers who weren’t ready to come back, probably won’t stay in that space forever. Maintain relationships. Check in with them. Consider finding no-contact ways they could still serve such as writing cards or making phone calls. Keep them in the loop with communication. Most of all, check in and care for them.  

 

Communicate with your leadership. Keep other church leadership informed of the challenges you face and how you are working to address them. Don’t whine and complain, rather share facts and concerns. Work together to establish reopening timelines and determine what is realistic for your congregation at this time. The more you strategically communicate with your senior leadership, the better understanding they can have of what is happening in your ministry and the better they can support you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. 

 

As with everything else in ministry these days, we are figuring this out as we go. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with your congregation. More than anything else, trust God that He has a beautiful plan for your ministry. 

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Pastor, Your Church Needs You to Take a Vacation

There are two types of sleep: BC and AD. Before Children and After Death.

God does not take naps, but you might need one. Far too many pastors do not get a proper cycle of rest. In the fourth commandment, God set up a pattern of work and rest. This pattern goes back to the creation account in which God rested on the seventh day. 

Notice the connection between rest and salvation in Psalm 62: “I am at rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.” True rest is found only in God’s salvation. In the Old Testament, we have the promise of rest from God. In the New Testament, we learn how to enter this rest—only through Jesus. You cannot properly point people to eternal rest in Christ if you are not rested spiritually and physically. 

Generally, Americans are restless. In the 1940s, the average American got right at eight hours of sleep per night. Today, the average is under seven hours. We are burnt out, worn out, tired, sleepy, and cooked. Our first two movements in the morning are to stop the alarm clock and look at the cell phone. 

Everyone needs rest. Taking a sabbath is important. Taking a vacation is important. 

Pastors should model proper behavior. Part of leadership is showing the way. It is hypocritical to teach about spiritual health if you’re not accounting for your own physical health. A fat slob of a preacher will never effectively communicate spiritual disciplines. A workaholic pastor cannot possibly communicate moderation honestly. 

Pastors are not the heroes of their churches. You need this reminder. Your church needs this reminder. If you lead well, then you will equip enough people to serve while you take a quick breather. Entire ministries are built around the charisma of a talented leader. Clearly, this model is wrong and completely unsustainable. However, it’s just as wrong to believe your church cannot possibly operate for a Sunday or two in your absence. Both models—the charismatic hero and the worker bee hero—are misguided. 

Your family needs more of your time. Rare is the pastor who is dedicating too much time to family. Most pastors have created idols of their churches at the expense of their families. Idol worship is always destructive and never beneficial. Take a vacation and kill your idols. 

Creativity needs to be recharged. Like a battery, creative energy often needs a recharge. You can operate on low power for quite some time. You can lead through weariness, but creativity almost always suffers. Take a vacation and come back a more energized and creative leader. 

God created fun. Neglecting fun is neglecting a part of God. Go and have fun with your family. We don’t need any more curmudgeon pastors. 

Physical rest is good for the soul. There are those who believe the answer to their unrest is simply working harder, doing more, and justifying themselves. The harder you work to find rest apart from God, the more restless you become. True rest comes when you trust in Christ’s work, not your own. That’s the point of the atonement—Christ’s work on our behalf. If you’re not resting regularly, then you’re relying on your own efforts, not those of Jesus.

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Six Reasons Your Pastor Is About to Quit

About one-third of you readers are laypersons. This article is for you. Of course, I know pastors and other vocational ministry leaders will be reading as well. Perhaps, more than my article, they will be reading your comments. They will be searching eagerly to see if anyone has a word of encouragement. They may be anticipating the responses will be a barrage of negativity they have become accustomed to receiving.

Please hear me clearly. The vast majority of pastors with whom our team communicates are saying they are considering quitting their churches. It’s a trend I have not seen in my lifetime. Some are just weeks away from making an announcement. They are looking for work in the secular world. Some will move to bivocational ministry. Some will move to marketplace ministry.

But many will move. 

Why has this period of great discouragement ensued? Of course, it is connected to COVID-19, but the pandemic really just exacerbated trends already in place. We would have likely gotten to this point in the next three to five years regardless. 

I also want you to know that these pastors do not think they will be leaving ministry. They just believe the current state of negativity and apathy in many local churches is not the most effective way they can be doing ministry. 

So, they are leaving or getting ready to leave. There are many reasons why, but allow me to share the top six reasons, understanding that they are not mutually exclusive. 

Pastors are weary from the pandemic, just like everyone else. Pastors are not super humans. They miss their routines. They miss seeing people as they used to do so. They would like the world to return to normal, but they realize the old normal will not return.


Pastors are greatly discouraged about the fighting taking place among church members about the post-quarantine church. Gather in person or wait? Masks or no masks? Social distancing or not? Too many church members have adopted the mindset of culture and made these issues political fights. Pastors deal daily with complaints about the decisions the church makes. 


Pastors are discouraged about losing members and attendance. For sure, it’s not all about the numbers. But imagine your own mindset if one-half or more of your friends stopped engaging with you. And pastors have already heard directly or indirectly from around one-fourth of the members that they do not plan to return at all. 


Pastors don’t know if their churches will be able to support ministries financially in the future. In the early stages of the pandemic, giving was largely healthy. Church members stepped up. Government infusion of funds for businesses and consumers helped as well. Now, the financial future is cloudy. Can the church continue to support the ministries they need to do? Will the church need to eliminate positions? These issues weigh heavily on pastors. 


Criticisms against pastors have increased significantly. One pastor recently shared with me the number of criticisms he receives are five times greater than the pre-pandemic era. Church members are worried. Church members are weary. And the most convenient target for their angst is their pastor.


The workload for pastors has increased greatly. Almost every pastor with whom we communicate expresses surprise at their level of work since the pandemic began. It really makes sense. They are trying to serve the congregation the way they have in the past, but now they have the added responsibilities that have come with the digital world. And as expected, pastoral care needs among members have increased during the pandemic as well.

Pastors are burned out, beaten up, and downtrodden. 

Many are about to quit. 

You may be surprised to discover your pastor is among them.

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Six Reasons Your Pastor Is about to Quit

About one-third of you readers are laypersons. This article is for you. Of course, I know pastors and other vocational ministry leaders will be reading as well. Perhaps, more than my article, they will be reading your comments. They will be searching eagerly to see if anyone has a word of encouragement. They may be anticipating the responses will be a barrage of negativity they have become accustomed to receiving.

Please hear me clearly. The vast majority of pastors with whom our team communicates are saying they are considering quitting their churches. It’s a trend I have not seen in my lifetime. Some are just weeks away from making an announcement. They are looking for work in the secular world. Some will move to bivocational ministry. Some will move to marketplace ministry.

But many will move. 

Why has this period of great discouragement ensued? Of course, it is connected to COVID-19, but the pandemic really just exacerbated trends already in place. We would have likely gotten to this point in the next three to five years regardless. 

I also want you to know that these pastors do not think they will be leaving ministry. They just believe the current state of negativity and apathy in many local churches is not the most effective way they can be doing ministry. 

So, they are leaving or getting ready to leave. There are many reasons why, but allow me to share the top six reasons, understanding that they are not mutually exclusive. 

Pastors are weary from the pandemic, just like everyone else. Pastors are not super humans. They miss their routines. They miss seeing people as they used to do so. They would like the world to return to normal, but they realize the old normal will not return.


Pastors are greatly discouraged about the fighting taking place among church members about the post-quarantine church. Gather in person or wait? Masks or no masks? Social distancing or not? Too many church members have adopted the mindset of culture and made these issues political fights. Pastors deal daily with complaints about the decisions the church makes. 


Pastors are discouraged about losing members and attendance. For sure, it’s not all about the numbers. But imagine your own mindset if one-half or more of your friends stopped engaging with you. And pastors have already heard directly or indirectly from around one-fourth of the members that they do not plan to return at all. 


Pastors don’t know if their churches will be able to support ministries financially in the future. In the early stages of the pandemic, giving was largely healthy. Church members stepped up. Government infusion of funds for businesses and consumers helped as well. Now, the financial future is cloudy. Can the church continue to support the ministries they need to do? Will the church need to eliminate positions? These issues weigh heavily on pastors. 


Criticisms against pastors have increased significantly. One pastor recently shared with me the number of criticisms he receives are five times greater than the pre-pandemic era. Church members are worried. Church members are weary. And the most convenient target for their angst is their pastor.


The workload for pastors has increased greatly. Almost every pastor with whom we communicate expresses surprise at their level of work since the pandemic began. It really makes sense. They are trying to serve the congregation the way they have in the past, but now they have the added responsibilities that have come with the digital world. And as expected, pastoral care needs among members have increased during the pandemic as well.

Pastors are burned out, beaten up, and downtrodden. 

Many are about to quit. 

You may be surprised to discover your pastor is among them.

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3 Insights COVID-19 Has Revealed about Online Church

If you’re like most churches during this pandemic, you’ve been thrust in the world of Online Church. Now “Online Church” has many different names, flavors, and forms. For some it means just streaming the worship service to Facebook, for others, it means Zoom small groups or new ways to give online. Either way, this pandemic has forced most churches to figure out how they can exist in an online-only environment. 

However, now that we’re about five months into this pandemic, there are online patterns that we can see are starting to emerge. These patterns were not self-evident at first, but with each passing day, it’s more apparent that Online Church is here to stay and we need to grapple with some it’s consequences. 

Today, I’m going to walk you through key insights that these patterns reveal and how the church should respond. 

 

Online Church Should Represent the Whole Church

 

We’ve all heard the phrase “A church is more than just a building.” The same logic applies to Online Church. Online Church is more than just streaming a worship service. 

We all agree that our worship services serve as a vital component in the ministry of our churches, and we would also say the same thing about small groups, missions, and congregational care. This means that churches need to present the full expression of who they are and not just one aspect. We need to find ways to foster online small groups, digital evangelism, and caring for others who are quarantined. While it is true that we cannot make every aspect of church life happen online, nor should we try to, we need to at least have a digital presence for those ministries when possible. 

 

It’s Now Easy to Switch Churches with a Click

 

We know that when a church member is actively engaged in a small group, the church as a whole becomes a vital part of their life. Small groups have a way of making church “sticky” so that it’s difficult for someone to leave because of the relationships they’ve built.

When the church is only online, the church can lose some of that stickiness. Since we are no longer in person on Sundays we’re not bumping into friends in the church hallways or finding ways to eat lunch together after the service is over. Sunday routines are being transformed. 

So now the church is at a place where someone could easily switch churches by starting to watch another church online. Location and time do not matter. If they live in San Diego but want to “attend” a church in Atlanta, they can do so with the click of a button. Since we’re no longer physically present with each other, the only way most churches would know when people like this leave is when they stop giving online. 

The key to making churches become “sticky” online is to maintain those key one on one relationships. This does not have to be “high tech” but instead “high touch.” It can be a phone call, a FaceTime chat, or a simple handwritten note. This can be done through the work of your deacons, small group leaders, and staff. These relationship touchpoints are vital to keeping people engaged with your church.

 

We Have to Equip Our People for Online Ministry

 

One of the mistakes that churches made early on during the pandemic was to feel the need to control all aspects of online ministry. Every social media post, video, podcast, or email had to be vetted and approved. However, after a while, it became too much for most churches to handle. 

If we assume that Online Church is not going to go away anytime soon, then we’re going to need to learn to scale online ministry in such a way that it doesn’t fall solely on the church staff’s shoulders. 

This will require us to set up guidelines and then let go of ministry so that we can maintain a long term view of what needs to be done. If this sounds overwhelming, this is not different than how you would train your small group leaders, student ministry volunteers, etc. The difference is that you’re not training them for a brick and mortar environment, but an online one. 

For some churches, there’s a hope that COVID-19 goes away and we can return to normal. However, we need to prepare ourselves for the possibility that for some people Online Church will be the new normal and we have to find new ways to reach and disciple those people. 

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How Churches Are Failing Guests

Many church leaders plan the weekend with an eye toward those on the inside: the music we sing, the language we use, and the next steps we provide are often designed for those who are already part of the family. The problem is, we inadvertently overlook those who desperately want to fit in. We fail to give even small cues to help an outsider become an insider. 

Our weekends often bring comfort to the comfortable, but they can heap discomfort on those who already feel out of place. As believers on the inside, we have a choice: we can continue to set up our sanctum of solitude, or we can throw open the doors, set aside our preferences, and welcome outsiders into our circle.

Planning the weekend through the lens of hospitality

In an earlier post, I said that hospitality is the new apologetic. In our increasingly-divided society, the kindness of hospitality sets us apart, begs a question, and demands an answer. 

When we plan the weekend with an eye toward the outsider, we follow the model of Jesus as a “friend of sinners.” We want them to see the grace of God, feel the love of a family, and be welcomed in rather than elbowed out.

That means we follow the old adage and keep the main thing the main thing. Our main thing must always be the gospel. We dare not substitute any other thing in its place. The good news of Jesus will always draw others in. It will challenge us to put others first. And it will remind us that we were once on the outside, but God’s grace turns strangers and aliens into sons and daughters.

Only the gospel can sustain the weight of our guests’ expectations

When people visit our churches, they walk in with certain hopes, assumptions, and fears. They want a place to belong, a place to find help for their families, and a place to find stability for their lives. 

We can point our guests to any number of programs, ministries, small groups, and next steps, but if we fail to point them to Jesus, we have utterly failed. We dare not connect them to the ministries of the church without first pointing them to the shepherd of the church. 

Early next week, one of your weekend guests will tell the story of their visit to your church. Will it be the story you want them to tell?

In September and October I’ll be offering a series of free webinars to equip you and your team on guest services, volunteer culture, and connecting fringe attendees to the mission of your church. To find out more, click HERE .

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10 Reasons Churches Stop Growing at the 200 Barrier

It’s common for churches to hover around 200 in attendance, bouncing slightly below and slightly above that number recurrently, but not moving beyond that level. Here are some reasons that plateau happens:

Pastoral leadership style – Pastors who must be involved in every member’s life and who don’t delegate ministry usually cannot shepherd a congregation larger than 200. Many pastors simply don’t know how to change this leadership style.
Building space – Many churches build first or second buildings that will hold about 200 worshippers. If space is unavailable for future growth, that growth won’t happen.
Church expectations – Some congregations simply don’t want to be larger than about 200. They don’t want so many members they can’t know everybody, so outreach slows as the church approaches the 200 barrier.
Church history – In many cases, a church has a history of hitting 200, bouncing backward for a while, and then growing again up to 200. That’s been their history, so 200 has become the height of “the good old days.” 
Man-sized vision – That is, the church leaders have no vision beyond the 200 barrier. They know they can get to this point, and that becomes their target. Nobody’s thinking about God’s doing something larger than that point.
Poor preparation – Some leaders don’t think about addressing the 200 barrier until the church is at that level – which means they’ve made no preparation to push through the barrier. Their reactive leadership halts the church’s growth. 
Ecclesiological choice – For those pastors who believe they must know every member of their congregation well, maxing attendance at about 200 is intentional. Others are church planting pastors who’ve determined that anything beyond 200 is a call to send out laborers to start another congregation. In the latter case, growth is still occurring—it just looks different.
Burdening bureaucracy – Churches that have numerous meetings, multiple committees, and slow processes often get stuck around 200. They’re not prepared structurally to cross that barrier. 
Pastoral tenure – If pastors don’t stay at their church beyond 3-4 years, it’s hard for the church to move past 200. Pastoral transitions tend to slow down church growth for a while.
Poor discipleship – Moving beyond 200 requires a church to have trained lay leaders to carry on the work of ministry. Churches that don’t intentionally make disciples don’t often have these workers. 

 What obstacles have you seen? Let us hear your thoughts.

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Five Reasons Why Church Adoption and Church Fostering Are Such Important Movements

When Sam Rainer coined the word “adoption” two years ago as a descriptor of one church acquiring another, I knew he was on to something. Instead of using corporate words like “acquisition” or unclear words like “replanting,” he used a powerful familial word. Adoption is one family bringing another family member into the household of faith.

 I followed Sam’s example a year later by using the word, “fostering” to refer to a healthier church helping a less healthy church for a season. In the case of adoption, the arrangement is permanent. For fostering, the relationship is temporary.

Both are important and powerful words because they describe two distinct but closely related movements that are important and powerful. Why are these terms so important? Even more, why are the movements behind them so important? Here are five reasons: 

When a church is adopted or fostered, closure is prevented or, at the very least, less likely. There is therefore still a congregational presence in the community. The physical resources intended for God’s work remain for God’s work.


The pandemic has increased the need for church adoption and fostering. More churches are struggling. More churches are at risk of closure. More pastors are leaving under pressure and frustration. The need is great. And the resources are there. 


The church adoption and church fostering movements are reminders that churches should work together to reach a community. These movements are a form of “horizontal growth” rather than the typical “vertical growth.” The latter is focused on getting as many people as possible to one place on Sunday morning. The former is focused on reaching the community. 


Churches that foster and/or adopt get healthier themselves. Both church adoption and church fostering are outwardly focused ministries. They take the focus off the unholy trinity of me, myself, and I, and move the focus to reaching others with the gospel. Outwardly focused churches don’t have time to be grumbling churches.


These movements are grassroots and local. Those involved know the community. They typically love the community. This movement is not a movement where a denominational authority or some other distant entity tries to impose its will on a community. Fostering and adopting churches take place because those who lead them know healthier churches will lead to healthier communities.

 We will be spending quite a bit of time discussing, researching, and following these movements. They may prove to be some of the greatest opportunities coming out of the pandemic. 

Is your church involved in either of these movements? What comments or questions do you have? We would love to hear from you.

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