Thom S. Rainer's Blog, page 286

Five Reasons I Am Thankful for My Critics

I had a neat outline planned. It was a list of those things for which I am very thankful. For certain, it would be appropriate for this week.

Then the email came.

It was a scathing criticism against me. The writer spared no words or emotions. He was really mad at me.

I paused. Though I did not hear an audible voice, I was convicted of my attitude. Am I really a thankful person, or do I just give a nod to God when things go my way? Do I rejoice in the Lord always, or do I rejoice in the Lord when things don’t go so well?

Like this email.

Like this critic.

Can I even be thankful for critics and criticisms? After a time of prayer and reflection, my attitude improved a bit. Indeed, I could name at least five reasons I am thankful for critics.

So, why I am thankful for critics? I am glad you asked.

Because I am wrong sometimes, perhaps often. Just because I received a criticism does not mean he’s wrong and I am right. I need to consider prayerfully the nature of the criticism to see if I can learn something.
Because I need an extra dose of humility. If I can move to a greater level of humility, I can become more like Christ. I need greater humility. I need to be more like Christ.
Because I tend to pray more. It’s really an indictment against me and my spiritual maturity. But I do tend to pray with greater frequency and greater fervency when I am criticized.
Because I need to be a greater encourager. I don’t like criticisms. They are painful. I need to remember to keep my own criticisms of others to a minimum, and to offer more encouragements. Criticisms remind me to encourage others.
Because I need to improve and grow. The criticisms remind me of my inadequacies and my lack of growth in many areas. I can either have a pity party, a fit of anger, or I can seek to be better. The critics push me closer to God who is my strength for any and all improvements.

If you are a leader, you will have criticisms. If you don’t have any criticisms, you’re probably not leading.

Look at the critics and the criticisms through the lens of thanksgiving. You might just become a person closer to God if you do. And you might serve Him more faithfully.

Thank you, critics. I am thankful for you.

And to the rest of you, thank you as well. Have a great and joyous Thanksgiving week.

photo credit: derekGavey via photopin cc

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10 Concerns of Young Church Leaders

By Chuck Lawless

I have previously posted here about what we older leaders need to hear from young church leaders, but I continue to learn from them and about them. They are passionate, energetic, globally minded, committed . . . and concerned. Here are some of their concerns we must consider:

They do not want to do ministry alone. Not only do they recognize the value of together facing struggles, but they also understand the strength of collective wisdom. Indeed, many argue that leading a church without a plurality of leaders is unbiblical. Whether in a local church or on the mission field, they want to work as a team.
They still want heroes. Many have been raised in broken homes and/or struggling churches. They want heroes, but they have often found them primarily via the Internet and social media. When they cannot find the integrity of lifestyle or depth of teaching they want in their home or home church, they have found it via podcasts, blogs, and streamed worship services.
They would prefer to learn from another church leader before leading on their own. If they could choose between (a) an associate position at the feet of a strong leader or (b) a position that immediately places them in top-level leadership, many young leaders would choose the former. They are willing to learn awhile and to earn their stripes under the right leader.
They want mentors who ask hard questions. This conclusion, of course, echoes others in this list. Young leaders are surprisingly open to older leaders who not only teach them to do ministry, but who also “drill down” into their lives. They want someone to hold them accountable to spiritual disciplines, holy living, and Great Commission obedience. They view vulnerability as necessary more than frightening.
They have little patience with bureaucracy. They are young, but nevertheless live with a Great Commission urgency. Thus, they have little room for organization that seemingly produces only delay and stagnation. Loyalty ends when structures and processes get in the way of the greater task.
They are apprehensive about leading the established church. They have heard too many stories about power groups, rigid leadership, inward focus, and untrained members. Some have experienced their own pain when leading an established church. Planting a church sounds much more inviting than trying to change a plateaued congregation.
They welcome financial guidance. Many carry significant college and consumer debt that handcuffs them. Most have received little or no training in church finances. Some wrestle annually with clergy tax laws, and they think too little about retirement savings. Even those who realize their need do not know where to turn for guidance.
They are concerned that “being Christian” is often equated with “being American.” They are not unpatriotic, but they understand that Christianity is much bigger than America. The banner under which they serve is first and foremost the banner of Christianity.
They want help with balance. This generation has wisely recognized the importance of prioritizing family – at least in word if not in deed. They know that husbands are to lead their homes. They do not want to become statistics among the next generation of broken marriages. What they have not always learned is how to balance family with church positions that often require 40+ hours, evening events, and emergency calls.
They admit their struggles with spiritual disciplines. Push young leaders, and many will speak of continual battles in their own spiritual walk. They are often especially aware of their need to pray more. They want prayer to be relational and potent, but seldom have they seen it modeled as such.

I am by no means suggesting young leaders are without room for growth. In their passion, they sometimes miss the lessons of history. Their youthfulness is at times evident in their lack of a long-term perspective. At the same time, though, their generation is quickly stepping into leadership. We are wise to walk beside them, love them, pray for them, guide them as needed, and rejoice if/when God does even greater things through them than through us.

Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary. You can connect with Dr. Lawless on both Twitter and Facebook.

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Three Trends in Local Churches That Are Accelerating

If you are a regular reader of this blog, you are aware that I share major trends in local churches in America on an annual basis. I write about these trends the first week in January, and I plan to do so again in 2015.

I watch the trends throughout the year. I am curious to see how accurate my predications are; and I desire to see if there are any major shifts taking place.

Among the trends I noted, I see three of them that are growing at an accelerated pace. To use the words of Jim Collins, they are in the midst of the flywheel effect. Indeed, it looks like they may shape the way churches function for years to come.

Please note that I provide these trends as observations without offering qualitative assessments. Indeed, I confess that I am not fully certain about the impact of these trends in our churches in the years ahead.

More multi-site and multi-venue churches. It does not seem that long ago that a multi-site church in America was a rare exception. Indeed, many viewed this approach with suspicion because they were uncertain about its efficacy or theological foundations. Today, the multi-site church seems commonplace and normative. The acceleration of the multi-site church is taking place as smaller churches begin to adopt the approach. This strategy was largely adopted by megachurches just a few years ago. Today, churches of 300 in attendance and even smaller have joined the multi-site strategy.
More multi-preacher/teacher churches. As a multi-site churches have increased in number, so have the number of churches with more than one regular preacher or teacher. But the multi-site movement alone cannot explain the accelerated growth of this phenomenon. Again, its adoption by smaller churches has increased the growth rate more than any one factor. I can think of dozens of congregations under 200 in attendance that have more than one preacher or teacher.
The rapid increase in large churches functioning as quasi-denominations. The functions of denominations have historically included missions funding; funding of theological education; providing of Bible study and other resources; and guidance in both polity and ethical issues. Today, many large churches carry out, to some degree, all of these functions. The acceleration of this development seems to have three sources. First, many churches are generally dissatisfied with the direction of the denomination of which they are a part. Second, most denominations have fewer funding dollars to carry out their functions. Third, many struggling churches have elected to become acquired by another church, essentially making the acquiring church act as an oversight body of other churches.

These trends are not big surprises. Indeed, I have noted them on this site a few times. The surprise is the accelerated growth of these trends. In just a few years, these approaches have become more commonplace than most of us would have ever predicted.

I would love to hear your thoughts on these accelerated trends. What are the implications of these developments? Are there other rapid trends I did not note? Let me hear from you.

photo credit: Loïc Lagarde via photopin cc

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Pray for Fountain of Grace Church

Location: Medina, Ohio

Pastor: Mark Rice

Weekly Worship: Sundays at 10:00 AM Eastern

Fast Facts: Though Fountain of Grace Church has been in existence since 2005, they are actually a completely new church plant with a new pastor. They are trying to establish the church as a solid Bible church in Medina that faithfully teaches God’s Word expositionally to God’s people so that they grow to be more like our Lord and Savior. Please pray for the Lord’s provision of financial stability through a combination of increases in the church and in church planting ministry supporters as well as suitable part-time employment for Pastor Rice. Please pray for them to energetically and boldly proclaim the Gospel as God grants them opportunities.

Website: TheFountainOfGrace.org

“Pray for . . .” is the Sunday blog series at ThomRainer.com. We encourage you to pray for these churches noted every Sunday. Please feel free to comment that you are praying as well.

If you would like to have your church featured in the “Pray for…” series, download this information form and return it to the address on the form.

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Eight Very Difficult Ministry Situations for Pastors

In a recent post, I shared the results of an informal Twitter poll that pointed out the greatest sources of discouragement of pastors and staff. In this post, I share the challenges of difficult ministry situations. Specifically I asked: “What are some of the most difficult situations you have had in pastoral ministry?”

This time, I am simply reporting anecdotal information in my conversations with pastors. Eight consistent themes have arisen.

Moral failure of a church staff member. “When our associate pastor confessed to his affairs and left his family, our entire church was devastated. It was over a year before we began to recover; I have really been involved in grief ministry with his failure and departure.”
Funeral of a child or teenager. “I have done a few funerals of young people, and it’s the most difficult thing I’ve done in ministry. There is a grief among the survivors that is not comparable to other situations.”
Declining financial situation in the church. “We had no choice. The church was running out of money. We had to make some hard choices. A lot of church members left as a result. That made our financial problems even greater.”
Dismissing a friend on church staff. “It was my dream to see him join our church staff. But it just didn’t work out. Letting him go was one of the most painful things I’ve done in ministry.”
Funeral of an unbeliever. “I’ve probably done more than a dozen funerals of unbelievers. To this day, I still struggle with how to speak at those funerals. I focus most of my words on comforting the family, but I really don’t know how to offer hope to them.”
Confronting a church member. “She was bitter and gossiped all the time. No one else had the courage to confront her, so I had to do the dirty work. It was not a pretty situation, and I’m still suffering from the confrontation today.”
Moral failure of a key lay leader. “When we found out he had been stealing money from the church, we were absolutely floored. He was a key leader. Church members felt like they had been betrayed.”
Bringing order to a contentious church business meeting. “It was a church fight like I have never seen. I never learned at seminary how to deal with such a situation. I felt totally inept.”

I could add several more difficult ministry situations pastors shared with me, but these eight were the most mentioned themes. What do you think of the eight situations I highlighted? What would you add?

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Be the Message with Pastor Kerry Shook – Rainer on Leadership #081

Podcast Episode #081

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Pastor and author Kerry Shook joins us on the podcast this week. On the show, we discuss Kerry’s new book, multisite ministry, megachurches, and much more.

Some highlights from the episode:

Sermons are only half over when you hear them. You need to live them out as well.
“It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts.” – John Wooden
We have to keep learning as pastors.
In those early days of our church plant, we got a lot more negativity from Christians than non-Christians.
Leadership tension is needed because it draws us closer to the Lord.
Dream big, pray hard, build people, and leave the results to God.

About Kerry Shook:

Kerry and his wife, Chris, founded Fellowship of The Woodlands, now Woodlands Church in 1993. Kerry believes that church should be engaging and fun, calling it “The Best Hour of Your Week.” He strives to eliminate the barriers of boredom, unfriendliness and fear that keep people from experiencing not just religion but a relationship with Jesus Christ. His messages are relevant, and his illustrations memorable.

Kerry Shook Ministries is a worldwide television ministry that broadcasts to a local, national and international audience. Pastor Kerry and Chris can now be seen by millions in 50 states and over 200 countries worldwide. Kerry and Chris have been married twenty-five years and have four children.

Episode Sponsor

This week’s podcast is brought to you by Pastors Today. This weekly newsletter provides pastors with resources and information from around the web written specifically for pastors. For more information and to subscribe, visit lifeway.com/pastorstoday.

Feedback

If you have a question you would like answered on the show, fill out the form on the podcast page here at ThomRainer.com. If we use your question, you’ll receive a free copy of Autopsy of a Deceased Church.

Resources

BeTheMessage.org
14 Questions Church Leaders Should Ask about Church Finances
Firsthand Faith

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Notable Voices: November 20, 2014

Blind Spots — James Emery White

Every church has blind spots. And the recent post on what drives guests away from churches exposed a few for several churches. James writes about the blind spot he discovered at Mecklenburg Community Church and how he corrected it.

 

The First 11 Minutes at Your Church — Eric Geiger

Eric shares a checklist for churches to use to tell how the first few moments of a church visit goes for a guest. This is a helpful tool in light of the recent discussion here at the blog.

 

7 Ways to Improve Your Church’s Twitter Profile Right Now — Darrel Girardier

If a church is going to be on social media (and it should), then it needs to do things correctly. Darrel’s tips will help your church be more effective on Twitter.

 

Your Church Is Without a Senior Pastor: Now What? — Gavin Ortlund

I hear from churches looking for pastors nearly every week. If your church is fits that description, start here.

 

8 Elements of a Healthy Small Church — Karl Vaters

Not all small churches are unhealthy. And not all large churches are healthy. Each can be measured differently. So if you attend or pastor a small church, see how you rank on this list instead of as compared to large churches.

 

Healthy Leader, Healthy Church — Derwin Gray

Derwin shares five reflections on emotionally unhealthy spirituality and how the health of a leader reflects in the health of a church.

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Eight Trends about Church Bulletins

It is amazing to look at the total resources of time and money expended on church bulletins. Because bulletins seem to be such a trivial issue, we often fail to consider their impact or lack of impact. In reality, the impact is greater than we might imagine. Not only do we expend significant resources on bulletins, both guests and members tend to have pretty strong feelings about them.

Our team has been observing some major trends regarding bulletins. Here is what we found thus far.

Most churches today still use church bulletins. They are important, if not necessary, according to most church leaders today. Churches under 100 in attendance are more likely not to use bulletins.
Church bulletins go by many different names today. Smaller churches tend to still call them bulletins. For churches 200 attendance and higher, there is great variety in the names: worship folder, worship guide, information guide, and many more.
There is an obvious level of frustration among some leaders and members about the contents of church bulletins. The most common frustration is about what content is included and excluded. The second most common frustration is content that is old and dated.
There are three common usages of church bulletins. The three most common usages are: order of worship; church metrics or statistics; and sermon notes.
Most churches use greeters to hand out bulletins. These persons are also called ushers in some churches. The distribution of the bulletin is considered an act of hospitality or greeting in many churches.
Most guests expect to be handed something when they walk in the worship center. So church leaders should realize that the bulletin is an opportunity to connect with those guests.
The digital revolution and the green movement have not significantly impacted the use of bulletins. Most churches still provide paper bulletins.
Another frustration among some church members is a sloppy bulletin, particularly one that has grammatical errors. An entire genre of funny things written in church bulletins has been an offshoot of these error-prone publications.

Certainly in the context of important facets of corporate worship, church bulletins likely will not rise to the top. But because they are so pervasive, and because they do impact so many people, they should not be ignored either.

What has been your experience with church bulletins? What would you like to see changed? I look forward to hearing from you.

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10 Common Worship Distractions

By Chuck Lawless

Worship is frequently a controversial topic, and it’s not my goal with this post to add to those debates. I also realize that the focus of worship is God. Any attention we give to the human component of worship might send us in the wrong direction, but that’s not my intent, either. I simply want us to think about aspects of worship over which we have some control – and that we might improve for God’s glory.

Based on my work as a church consultant, reports from our consultation “secret shoppers,” interviews with church members, and my own experiences, here are ten far-too-common distractions during worship services.

Starting late. Our secret shoppers know to be present in the worship center prior to the publicized starting time and to record what time the service actually begins. A late start may be unavoidable, but too often the tardiness is seemingly due to disorganization and apathy. A late start seldom strengthens an attitude of worship.
Poor sound and/or video quality. Occasionally this problem unexpectedly happens when the system malfunctions. At other times, it seems clear that either (a) rehearsal never occurred to detect and correct any problems or (b) leaders chose to ignore problems. Either one is unacceptable.
Excessively loud music. I suspect my age is apparent here, but even some of our young secret shoppers have commented negatively on this issue. Increased volume may be appropriate in some settings, but it does not automatically strengthen worship. Sometimes, worship occurs best in the quiet.
Incomprehensible choir or praise team words. The lyrics are probably great, but we cannot tell. The sound system may be poor, the singers may not enunciate well, or the music may drown out the words – but we miss the message while straining to understand the words. Simply including the lyrics on a Powerpoint would help.
Grammatical and/or spelling errors on the screen. Granted, this error should perhaps not be a distraction. Surely, we can overlook an omitted apostrophe or misspelled homonym. On the other hand, God – and worshipers who are often well educated – deserve our best in presentation.
Poor synchronization of presentation slides. The operator gets caught up in the worship and fails to progress to the next slide. Or, activity in the sound booth becomes itself a distraction for the operator. Nevertheless, it’s difficult to worship in song when the lyrics on the screen are measures behind the worship leader.
Unclear directions. Worshippers – especially guests or unchurched attenders – do not readily follow everything that takes place in a worship service. Even our best secret shoppers sometimes feel awkward over such questions as: Who is the person speaking (no one introduced him)? Will they recognize guests (and will I be put on the spot)? Am I permitted to partake of the Lord’s Supper (no one explained it)? If the church does not take an offering, how do I give (again, no one guided us)?
Poor lighting. The problem may simply be weak lighting; that is, uneven lighting in the worship center creates dim sections where reading the Bible is difficult. In some cases, delayed maintenance results in burned out bulbs. In others, a darkened room intentionally creates worship ambience – but also reflects a wrong assumption that all worshipers will be reading the Bible only on the screen.
Bad preaching. This conclusion is subjective, but nonetheless truthful: worship is challenging when the preaching is boring or disorganized. It’s even more taxing when the sermon covers everything but the Bible.
Crowd movement. To be fair, I admit that worship should so focus on God that crowd movement is not distracting. In addition, many folks we interview sit toward the back of a worship center, where the movement is likely more noticeable. Nevertheless, folks coming and going from the worship center – especially during times of prayer, reflection, preaching, and response – can be disruptive.

What other worship distractions have you noticed?

Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary. You can connect with Dr. Lawless on both Twitter and Facebook.

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Seven Ways to Deal with CAVE Dwellers in Your Church

They are in every church. They are critics. They are naysayers. If your church has regular business meetings, they will be the negatively outspoken people.

They often begin sentences with “I love you pastor, but . . .” And the moment you hear “but,” you cringe. You wait for the verbal assault.

Critics and naysayers are in every church. They are CAVE (Consistently Against Virtually Everything) Dwellers (This phrase originated with Curt Coffman in his work on disengaged employees.). They can make your life miserable . . . unless you learn to deal with them.

I am not the best role model for dealing with CAVE dwellers. When I was a pastor, I struggled with critics and naysayers. I still do. So I asked some church leaders who, in my opinion, have a very healthy approach to these people. Here are seven things I learned from them.

Accept the reality that every church and organization will have CAVE dwellers. You will deal with them in a more healthy fashion if you are not blindsided by them. And you will realize than the green grass of other churches may be a bit brown.
Pray for your own attitude. I am glad Jesus did not hold my sins against me through his death on the cross. My attitude should be like His, and I should seek prayerfully to have the right attitude toward CAVE dwellers.
Pray for the CAVE dwellers. Even if you consider them your enemy, we are supposed to pray for our enemies. Sometimes I have to ask God to give me the grace to pray for these people because they have hurt me so much.
Stay above reproach. Don’t stoop to the negative, gossiping, bickering, and deceitful level of CAVE dwellers. Pray that God will give you the strength, wisdom, and grace to live above such attitudes and actions.
Spend more time with positive church members. CAVE dwellers can be the squeaky wheels that demand constant oiling. If you spend too much time with these members, you will become emotionally and spiritually drained. Be intentional about spending time with church members who energize and encourage you.
Spend more time with church leaders in other churches. You will develop invaluable friendships and camaraderie. And you will soon discover you are not alone with these issues.
Ask other members to help you deal with CAVE dwellers. I recently heard from a pastor who did just that. He was shocked to find more than one encouraging church leader willing and ready to help him deal with these people. The comment from one of these positive members hit home: “Pastor, we did not know you were having to deal with these issues. We wish you had told us sooner.”

Yes, you will always have people in your church who seem to be consistently against virtually everything. They are emotionally draining. They are discouraging. And they never really go away.

Our challenge, in God’s power, is to deal with CAVE dwellers in the most positive and God-honoring way we can. So, how do you deal with CAVE dwellers? What would you add to the seven ways I noted above? Let me hear from you.

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