Lian Dolan's Blog, page 29

Academic Steroids! Sex, Lies & Shopping! Beware Bag Build-up! The New Chaos Chronicles podcast #516

Sorry, Ryan , you'll have to wait. I have to read this article on kids taking Good Grade Pills.

Like a lot of people, I started yesterday off with a cup of coffee, the French Open and the New York Times. My plan was to focus on my man Rafa while flipping through the style section which featured a nice spread on my man Ryan Lochte. But when I  saw the Page One, Above the Fold headline Risky Rise of the Good Grade Pill: Taking Stimulants not for a High, but for a Higher SAT Score, my intentions went out the window. Raf and Ryan could wait.  I was riveted by the story of high school juniors and seniors using stimulants prescribed for ADHD to stay on top academically while under tremendous pressure to perform at the highest levels all the time. Drugs like Adderall have become “Academic Steroids” with  he results being good grades and acceptances to top-notch colleges.

Maybe I was the last parent to know that kids did this, but I doubt it. I was stunned and shocked at the duplicity of the pill sellers and the matter-of-fact attitude of the pill takers. I was also incredibly saddened that  a small slice of this generation will grow up emotionally -dependent upon a magic pill to get them through a job interview or big presentation at work.

 

Read the article here and listen to the Chaos Chronicles. Then let’s discuss below. Is this prevalent in your community? Have you talked to your kids about this  kind of drug abuse? Is the pressure on high school kids real ( genuinely parent-driven) or is some of the drug-taking typical teen behavior?

Also on the show this week:

Academic Steroids! Sex, Lies & Money! Bag Build-up! The Chaos Chronicles Podcast #516


On the show this week:Teens on Academic Steroids: Students taking stimulants for Good Grades and High SAT scores. From the New York Times article.

Sex, Lies and Shopping: Self Magazine’s shocking survey on how we deal with money and spending in relationships

Bag build-up: The impending Plastic Bag Ban has Lian hoarding grocery bags

Plus, The Panini Generation: More on Aging Parents

Direct download: Chaos_516.mp3

Category:2012 — posted at: 9:02 PM

Embracing my Chaos, Lian

Happy Birthday, Baby!

My son Brookes is 17 today. That make me 17 years into my journey as a mom. Normally, I’m not a big fan of the word “journey”– to new age-y for me– but motherhood definitely qualifies a trip. No doubt it’s an  ongoing series of stops and starts, detours, flat tires, questionable food, questionable directions, forks in the road, curves and twists and lots of  great stretches of open highway. Thanks for the ride, Brookesy.

Embracing my Chaos,

Lian

Operation Chicken Pox: A Classic Chaos Chronicles about Balancing Work & Motherhood

Last night, I had the pleasure of speaking at the Altadena Public library to a wonderful group of volunteers ( and others.) During the question and answer period, a woman asked me about balancing work and motherhood. It’s a question I get almost every time I speak in some form or another, but last night I felt like I gave an inadequate answer. Or, I had a case of Maternal Amnesia. But the truth is,  because my boys are older now and able to get to and from school and practices or to be left home to fend for themselves for dinner, the stress of trying to balance work and motherhood has dimmed. It’s still there when one goes down with an illness or has a dreaded group project due, but it’s not as acute as in once was.

So, to remind myself of The Chaos That Once was, I dug into the Chaos Chronicles archives for this classic from June 2004. Ah, it’s all coming back to me now– the feeling o abject terror when the babysitter called in sick!

 

Monday

6:47 AM

The phone rings and my heart stops. Nobody calls this early in the morning but sick babysitters and my mother. And I just spoke to my mother yesterday. How much more information could she have on micro- waving sponges to rid them of bacteria?

“Huh-low,” I say cautiously, praying for a wrong number. But, alas, the number is right and the news is bad.

“It’s Francie. I have chicken pox.”

And just like that, the bubble bursts. It’s the Law of Inevitability for Working Families. Just when your work/childcare/life system is running the most efficiently is exactly when it implodes, sucking deadlines, appointments, sports practices into the void.

“How long?” I managed to sputter out.

“A week, at least.”

“Don’t itch,” I sign off.

 

7:07 AM

I pour another cup of coffee and line up the various daytimers, calendars, and scraps of paper with notes that constitute our master schedule.  Operation Chickenpox is underway. The key is not to panic. A few well-spent hours now will spare me a week of scrambling. I’ve been through this before and hysterical phone calls to my husband serve no purpose.  Satisfying in a high-drama sort of way, but ultimately pointless, because he says things like, “Just call my mother and ask her to watch them.”

Right, like I’m going to call my mother-in-law and grovel.

 7:24 AM

My week at a glance:

Brookes and Colin:

First week summer vacation

Doctors’ appointments/Tues. Impossible to re-schedule.

Swim team Mon/Wed/Fri evening.

Lian:

Accountant/hair today. Cancel?

2 early morning conference calls Tues/Fri.

Radio show production Tues/Thurs/Fri. Do from home.

Marketing meeting all day Weds. Can’t cancel.

Weds. night speaking engagement. Must do.

Berick:

Traveling Weds.

Usual long hours other days

7:49 AM

 

I call to apprise Berick him of our situation. We strategize about split shifts.  He agrees to go to the office mid-morning so I can work from 5 AM to 10AM at home.  I’ll cover dinner/bath/bed. If I go to the accountant alone, he’ll take the kids to their annual check-ups. All non-essential activities will be jettisoned.

That gets us about half way there. Wednesday is a problem.

As we hang up, he asks, “Where is the pediatrician’s office anyway?”

Busted.

 

8:01 AM

I am working the phones at the earliest possible moment allowed by etiquette. My first call is to Katherine. She’s got a mini-van and a generous bail-out policy.

“I’ll do swim team, no problem,” she says. “Why don’t you call Camp Run-a-muck?  They might have some spots this week.”

I tell her she is both brilliant and generous.

9:07 AM

How can every camp in a 25 miles radius be booked solid? Astro Camp, Chess Camp, Camp Cowboy. Full, full, full. Who would enroll their child in Opera Camp? Well, apparently somebody has, because that’s full, too!

 9:27 AM

I throw some Poptarts on the table and announce to the boys with feigned enthusiasm that they will be attending Math Camp on Thursday and Friday.

“Oh, not where Caitlyn goes. That’s not fun, that’s torture,” whines Brookes.

Yes! Little Miss Long Division who lives down the street!

 9:29 AM

“Muriel? It’s Lian. Guess what? Brookes and Colin are signed up for Multiplication Madness just like Caitlyn!”

Before she knows what’s hit her, Muriel agrees to drop-off if I do pick-up.

Victory. A conference call and two production meetings covered.

 10:32 AM

I’ve tried every back-up sitter. Struck out with every neighbor. Called in every playdate chit to no avail.  Wednesday is still a problem. I have no where left to turn.

I call my mother-in-law and grovel.

“I’ll take them overnight,” she offers graciously.

Salvation.

 10: 41AM

Operation Chickenpox complete. I am Jonas Salk and I have conquered the virus. Pass the Poptarts.

 

Embracing my Chaos, Lian

Related posts:

Classic Chaos Chronicles: The Oral Surgeon of my Dreams

Classic Chaos Chronicles: The Kids go to Summer Camp and the Parents make S’Mores

 

 

 

 

Chaos Chronicles 515: Panini Generation Update; Olympic Fever; Parenting Average Children

How awesome are these Lego Olympians? Alas, available only in the UK. I hope you Brits appreciate the Legos more than you seem to be appreciating London 2012.

On the show this week:


Chaos Chronicles Podcast 515: Panini Generation Update; Olympic Fever; and Parenting Average Children

 

The Panini Generation: Living with Alzheimers

From the Los Angeles Times: Patty Davis on the chains that break, the link that forms in Alzheimer’s

Olympic Fever: I want Dara Torres’ Flat Belly

Parents of Average Children Unite

Plus, To Do List

Embrace your Chaos, Lian

Want more audio entertainment this weekend? Lian and Liz interview writers Claire Cook and Jennifer Egan.

Author Interviews Redux: Claire Cook and Jennifer Egan

Two of my author friends are in the news this week. Good for them!

Claire Cook is publishing her next novel, Wallflower in Bloom in a  few days.  It arrives on June 5th in hardback and Kindle.

Jennifer Egan, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author of A Visit from the Goon Squad  is publishing a new short story via Twitter  at 140 characters at a time.

Both women were kind enough to sit down with my Satellite Sister Liz and I a few years ago as part of our Word Write Festival. In anticipation of the publication of Helen of Pasadena, we recorded a series of interview with authors. It was an exciting time for me. Today, I had  fun to listening back to the interviews as I anticipate the release of my own book. Jennifer Egan and Claire Cook are very different writers but with a similar quality: generosity of spirit. Full of advice, wisdom and humor.

I thought I’d re- post the interviews in case you missed them the first time around.  You can find them either at iTunes or at Stitcher Radio. Enjoy!

 

Claire Cook's new book comes out June 5. Click here to be taken to Clairecook.com

Claire Cook
Chaos Chronicles Interview with Author Claire Cook about Writing and Re-Invention

In honor of the release of Claire Cook’s new novel Wallflower in Bloom ( June 5, 2012), I’m reposting an interview with this fun, funny writer/mom/sister/inspiration. My Satellite Sister Liz and I talk to Claire about her book Seven Year Itch, how she made the leap into writing and what’s next on her agenda of re-einvention. Claire Cook’s latest book Wallflower in Bloom will be released this week in hardback and Kindle.

Direct download: Chaos_Claire_Cook.m4a

Category:2012 — posted at: 6:49 PM

 

 

We spoke to Jennifer before her book won every award known for Fiction Writing! You'll be fascinated to hear her writing process. Click here to be taken to jenniferegan.com

 

Chaos Chronicles Interview with Jennifer Egan, author of A Visit from the Goon Squad

Jennifer Egan is the Pulitzer Prize- winning author of a Visit from the Goon Squad and she’s making news this week by publishing her short story Black Box via Twitter. (Don’t worry, if you’re not on Twitter, you can find it in this week’s The New Yorker magazine or at jenniferegan.com )  In honor of that literary milestone, I’m reposting an interview with Jennifer Egan that I did several years ago with my Satellite Sister Liz. Jennifer Egan is warm, smart and super-articulate. A joy to talk to …

Direct download: Chaos_Jennifer_Egan.m4a

Category:2012 — posted at: 7:21 PM

Home Improvement Tip: Call it Oyster, not Taupe

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the future of The Chaos Chronicles, in the sense that soon, with one son in college and only one son at home, my life would not actually be that Chaotic. Maybe I should transition now to The Calm Chronicles or The Now What Chronicles? Then, last week happened and I was reminded that a little Chaos is energizing. A Lot of Chaos is exhausting!

At home, we were hosting a Golden Anniversary Party for my in-laws, so my husband decided to repaint the kitchen. Then, my son contracted another mystery virus, missing his 20th day  of school during his junior year.  I had to fulfill a long-standing volunteer commitment on Friday night, plating and serving food at a reception  for 300 people. My father, who is in the late stages of Alzheimer’s, needs 24 hours care immediately so we hastily set up some visits to care facilities, did the tours and then put together a family conference call to discuss next steps. And, in the middle of this, we decided to revamp satellitesisters.com this weekend.

That was a relaxing Holiday Weekend.

In the middle of all the chaos, I got a very funny text from my friend Chris who had listened to last week’s Satellite Sisters podcast when I mentioned that the kitchen would be Taupe and Dusty Blue. Chris, a Decider of All Things Tasteful, texted to say: Call it Oyster, Not Taupe, More Modern.  It made me laugh– which I needed this weekend!

 

As requested, a few photos of our Oyster and Dusty Blue Kitchen/TV Room/ Dining Area. I’m not sure my photography skills do my husband’s paint job justice. It looks great. AND he finished a full hour before I started cooking for the party!

The TV room: World's comfiest couch, cozy wall color and a vintage travel poster painted by my husband's great uncle Adolph Treidler.

 

More posters on the "Lake Placid" Blue throughout the rest of the kitchen. The colors work really well together. I wish I could capture them properly.

 

Believe me, it works. Even if my photos don’t capture the rich mix!

 

To see some photos from the Golden Anniversary Party, head on over to Facebook. 

 

Off to do some writing. A little Calm before the Chaos. New podcast tomorrow.

Embracing my Chaos

Red, White and Blueberry Muffins for Memorial Day

My schedule got a little chaotic this week. Thanks for  your patience. In return,  how about:

MY MOTHER’S UNBELIEVABLE BLUEBERRY MUFFINS

3 ½ c. sifted all-purpose flour

2 T. baking powder

¾ c. sugar

Pinch of salt

5 eggs, slightly beaten

½ c. milk

5 oz. unsalted butter, melted and cooled

4 or 5 cups blueberries (My mother always uses fresh, but you can use frozen if you live in Moscow or someplace where fresh blueberries are unavailable.)

Additional sugar for topping

 

Heat oven to 425 degrees. Mix all dry ingredients together. Stir in eggs, milk and butter; do not overmix. Carefully stir in berries. Grease the top of a large muffin tin (yup, the top for overflow). Insert paper baking cups and spoon batter to the top of the paper cups. Sprinkle generously with sugar. Reduce oven heat to 400 degrees (that’s right, you haven’t even put the muffins in yet!). Place muffin tins on middle shelf of oven. Bake about 25 minutes until the muffins are golden brown. Remove from muffin tins and cool. Yield: 15 to 16 large muffins.

 

Enjoy!

Embracing my chaos, Lian

Related links:

Recipes for Summer: Berick’s Sangria Recipe

Recipes for Summer: Girls Only Grilling

 

Readers! Book Lovers! What Book would you like to read again for the first time?

Sunday night at 9pm, my high school Junior announced the he needed to start The Catcher in the Rye on Monday. Did we have a copy, he asked. 

Thanks for the head’s up! Fortunately, we have a bookshelf filled with Classics We Read in High School and College. Moneysaver ! I pulled the classic edition with the maroon cover off the shelf, along with Nine Stories by Salinger. As I handed him the books, I told him, “I wish I could read The Catcher in the Rye again for the first time.” 

That got me thinking, of course. And posting on my Facebook Page about that very thought.   What book would you like to read again for the first time? The responses poured in:

Anne of Green Gables

To Kill a Mockingbird ( My 8th grader is reading this one now and loves it.)

Lots of props for Gone with the Wind

Slaughter House Five

John Irving fans weighed in with A Prayer for Owen Meany and Ciderhouse Rules

The Grapes of Wrath made a lot of lists

The Good Earth

Lonesome Dove ( Nice choice!)

A Confederacy of Dunces ( On my list, along with The Moviegoer)

Pride & Prejuduce

The list goes one and on. What’s interesting to me is that most of these books are assigned classics in college and high school. It makes me wonder if our reading experience is the book or the age or the circumstance. Most likely, a magical mystery of all three.

Let’s talk a little more about books this week on the podcast. Haven’t answered yet? Put your picks in the comment section.

BTW, Brookes loves A Catcher in the Rye. Loves it. A first…

Embracing my Chaos, Lian

Related posts:

 Ten things to Read, Watch or Listen to this Tuesday: Books

Ten Books to read this Summer 2011 Link

 

Facebook IPO! Donna Summer Celebration! Battleship! Chaos Chronicles Podcast514

On the podcast this week:

The Chaos Chronicles: Goodbye and Thank you for all the dishes, Donna Summer

News Round-Up: Coffee makes you live longer; Facebook IPO; John Edwards Trial

Advice for Getting through Graduations, from Pre-school to College

To Do List: Battleship & Barefoot Contessa

 

Related Links:

Want to see/hear a few pages from my next book? Click here to see the video on my Facebook page.

 

Embracing my Chaos, Lian

 

Do The Work Wednesday #10: In the Zone

When I’m writing, I know I’m in the zone when I start to picture scenes in my head in the middle of the night.  I have very clear visions of action unfolding, complete with dialogue and jokes. That’s a good thing and a bad thing, of course.

Bad thing: I’m lying awake and not getting  sleep.

Good: I can’t stop thinking about the project and I’m in the zone.

That happened last night. I completely re-imagined two scenes I’d worked on earlier in the day. Now that the kids are off to school, the dog has been walked and I’ve had my third cup of joe, it’s time to Do The Work.

How do you know you’re in the zone? How do you push through even if you’re not in the zone but still need to get the work done?

off to write..

Embracing my chaos, Lian

 

Want to Hear/See a Sneak Peak of Book #2? Check out the video on my Facebook Page! Scroll down to find the video. Thanks, Susan for shooting and posting this.

Related Posts:

Do the Work #9: It All Counts