Leslie Glass's Blog, page 286

Link Between Alcohol Marketing And Increased Consumption In Young People

From Science Daily:

Young people’s awareness of alcohol marketing — and their ownership of alcohol-branded merchandise — is associated with increased and higher-risk consumption, a landmark study has found.

Published in BMJ Open, the research — led by the University of Stirling and the Cancer Policy Research Centre at Cancer Research UK — revealed that 11 to 19-year-old current drinkers, who report high alcohol marketing awareness, are one-and-a-half-times more likely to be higher risk drinkers, compared to those who have low or medium awareness.

In young people who have never consumed alcohol, those who own alcohol-branded merchandise are twice as likely to be susceptible to drink in the next year, the research found.

Significantly, the paper reports that 82 per cent of young people recalled seeing at least one form of alcohol marketing in the month preceding the survey, with at least half estimated to have seen 32 or more instances — equating to one per day. Meanwhile, one fifth reported owning alcohol-branded merchandise.

The study — led by Dr Nathan Critchlow, of the University’s Institute of Social Marketing (ISM) — is the first to examine awareness of alcohol marketing and ownership of branded merchandise in a demographically representative sample of young people across the UK, including those both above and below the legal purchase age for alcohol.

Dr Critchlow said: “Alcohol marketing is more than advertising; it exists in many different forms — more commonly known as the marketing mix — and we found this was reflected in what young people recalled. More than a third of young people recalled seeing alcohol advertising through television, celebrity endorsement, and special offers in the week before they participated in the survey, while more than a fifth recalled seeing outdoors adverts or adverts on social media.

“Although alcohol consumption can be influenced by a variety of factors, we found that the association between alcohol marketing and increased consumption and higher-risk drinking in current drinkers, remained even after controlling for a range of demographic and confounders, such as parental and peer drinking. This was also true for the association between owning branded merchandise and susceptibility in never-drinkers.”

The study used data from the 2017 Youth Alcohol Policy Survey — a cross-sectional, YouGov-conducted survey with 11 to 19-year-olds across the UK. The weighted sample — of 3,399 young people — had an average age of 15.18 years old, an even distribution for gender, and 76 per cent were below the legal purchasing age. Of the weighted sample, 1,590 were current drinkers — with 44 per cent of those classified as being at higher risk — and 1,623 were never drinkers, with half of those classified as susceptible to drink in the next year.

The team measured how frequently young people recalled seeing nine different forms of alcohol marketing in the month preceding the study, ranging from traditional advertising — for example, in the press and on television; alternative marketing — such as sponsorship and competitions; and retail marketing — including price promotions.

Awareness was also estimated across the past month, and young people were categorised as reporting either low awareness (approximately every other day or less), medium awareness (approximately every day), and high awareness (almost twice a day or more).

Dr. Critchlow said: “The new study provides insight into the forms of alcohol marketing that young people are aware of, how frequently they recall seeing alcohol marketing, and what factors are associated with higher awareness of alcohol marketing and ownership of alcohol-branded merchandise.

“The influence that alcohol marketing has on young people, and how it is self-regulated in the UK, continues to be a topic of debate. The Scottish Government’s latest alcohol strategy includes plans to consult on alternative controls for alcohol marketing, and Ireland have recently passed legislation to this effect. Our findings lend support to these steps to examine further feasible, appropriate, and effective ways of reducing exposure in young people.”

Dr Jyotsna Vohra, Cancer Research UK’s head of cancer policy research, said: “Alcohol can cause seven different types of cancer: mouth, breast, bowel, liver, pharyngeal, esophageal, and laryngeal. It’s responsible for almost 12,000 cancer cases annually in the UK, and worryingly only 1 in 10 people know its link to cancer.

“The more you drink the greater the risk and this is why the Chief Medical Officers’ guidelines recommend no more than 14 units per week as a safer level of drinking. We know that not everyone who drinks will develop cancer but it doesn’t hurt to cut down.”

The post Link Between Alcohol Marketing And Increased Consumption In Young People appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

How Does Smoking Marijuana Affect Sperm?

From Medical News Today:

With the increased legalization of cannabis, especially medical marijuana, researchers are interested in finding out more about its effects on health. One area that is currently under exploration is that of marijuana’s effect on fertility.

As recent research shows, men in Western countries are facing a fertility crisis. Sperm count in males of reproductive age more than halved between 1973 and 2011.

According to the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, approximately 9 percent of men in the United States have faced infertility.

For this reason, researchers have been looking at how different modifiable factors, such as lifestyle choices, might affect male fertility.

In a new study, a team of investigators from the Harvard T. H. Chan School of Public Health in Boston, MA, has focused on the effects that smoking marijuana has on markers of male fertility.

The researchers’ findings, which they report in a study paper that features in the journal Human Reproduction, ran counter to the hypothesis that they established at the beginning of the study.

“[The] unexpected findings highlight how little we know about the reproductive health effects of marijuana and, in fact, of the health effects of marijuana in general,” notes study author Jorge Chavarro.

“Our results need to be interpreted with caution, and they highlight the need to further study the health effects of marijuana use,” he emphasizes.
Higher sperm concentration among users
To begin with, the research team speculated that men who either smoked or had smoked marijuana would have poor sperm quality. However, that is not the conclusion that this study reached.

In their research, the investigators recruited 662 men who attended the Fertility Clinic at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston between 2000 and 2017. The average participant was 36 years old, white, and had a college degree.

To assess sperm quality, the researchers collected and analyzed 1,143 semen samples from the study participants. They also took blood samples from 317 of the men. The team used the blood samples to test for reproductive hormones.

Additionally, the researchers asked the men to fill in questionnaires asking them about their use of marijuana, including whether they had ever smoked more than two joints and whether they still used marijuana.

The team found that 365 (or 55 percent) of the participants had smoked marijuana at some point in their lives. Of these people, 44 percent no longer used this substance, while 11 percent self-identified as current smokers.

In looking at the semen samples, the researchers noticed that men who had used marijuana had higher average sperm concentrations than nonsmokers.

More specifically, marijuana users had an average sperm concentration of 62.7 million sperm per milliliter of ejaculate, whereas their peers who had never smoked marijuana had 45.4 million sperm per milliliter of ejaculate.

The investigators also observed that among marijuana smokers, only 5 percent had sperm concentrations below 15 million sperm per milliliter of ejaculate — the threshold for “normal” sperm concentration levels — while 12 percent of never-smokers had sperm concentrations below this level.

Findings consistent with interpretations

Another finding reported in the study indicates that marijuana smokers who used the substance more frequently also tended to have higher blood testosterone levels.

Still, the researchers warn that their results may not apply to the general male population since the study focused specifically on men seeking treatment at a fertility clinic.

Even though they were unexpected, the authors suggest that their findings do make logical sense in the context of marijuana’s effect on the human endocannabinoid system, which responds to the active compounds present in this substance.

“Our findings were contrary to what we initially hypothesized. However, they are consistent with two different interpretations, the first being that low levels of marijuana use could benefit sperm production because of its effect on the endocannabinoid system, which is known to play a role in fertility, but those benefits are lost with higher levels of marijuana consumption.”

Lead author Feiby Nassan

“An equally plausible interpretation is that our findings could reflect the fact that men with higher testosterone levels are more likely to engage in risk-seeking behaviors, including smoking marijuana,” Nassan adds.

The post How Does Smoking Marijuana Affect Sperm? appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

God In A Box VS. A God Box

Religion taught me to put God in a box. Recovery teaches me to put my problems in a God Box. Everything I knew about religion I learned in Church, but everything I know about God, I learned in recovery.

God In A Box

My relationship for God goes way back to Bible school and lacy socks, felt boards and red kool-aid, but back then, I was terrified of God. I thought he was as big as the jolly Green giant, but He wasn’t green or jolly.

As I grew up, my relationship with God mirrored all of my other codependent relationships. I was very afraid of Him. I felt I had to be perfect to avoid His wrath. In my mind, He had all of the Wizard of Oz’s powers, but He was just as stingy. If I wanted help from God, I was sure He wouldn’t grant it. I felt like I had to do all of the work for Him. Then I prayed for Him to have mercy on me and bless my well-crafted solution.

My Mistrust Grew

In my college years, my dear friend Jason was diagnosed with cancer. I knew God could and should cure Jason. Every day and night, I prayed and I asked all of my friends to pray. I had enough faith to move mountains, and yet Jason died. This affirmed my view of a cold, uncaring God, and it was only the first of many major disappointments.

With my codependency came extreme anxiety. I never slept. I spent years of sleepless nights praying over and over for my loved ones’ safety and sobriety. Praying never brought me the peace it was supposed to, nor did it bring sobriety for my loved ones. My faith weakened and my resentments grew. By the time I finally sought recovery, I was merely living until I died, and I didn’t believe God loved me.

Slowly God Outgrows The Box

In recovery, I learned I was codependent in all of my relationships, especially with God. I tried to control and manipulate God the same way I tried to control and manipulate everyone else. I had no serenity because I refused to accept life on life’s terms. Letting go of my problems was out of the question. I trusted no one.

A few days after my first meeting, my sponsor asked me to trust God with a decision. I waited for a week and finally settled on something small and insignificant.

Believe it or not, He came through for me. From there, I have slowly, slowly, slowly been learning to trust God more and more. The more I learn about my codependency and poor mental health, the more I learn about how wrong I was about God.

Once I learned to let other people pray their own prayers, I had more peace. This is an example of my codependency; I was enmeshed with everyone: siblings, spouse, parents, child, friends, cousins, neighbors, cashiers, and bank tellers. Not only did I let go of praying for them, but I also learned to let them run their own lives. What a novel idea. Then, I slowly learned to let my Higher Power run mine.

A God Box And The Serenity Prayer

Early on, I fell in love with the Serenity Prayer. Over and over I wrote out my worries:

God, grant me the serenity to accept: ____________. Please God, give me the courage to change: _______________. Above all, please give me the wisdom to know what to do.

I still regularly use this tool, and most days I sleep well at night free from obsessive thoughts.

Some days, however, I have a particularly difficult time accepting reality. More often, I don’t want to have the courage to set hard boundaries. On those days, I write my problems on post-it notes and place them in my God box. My God box is a small decorative tin. Yours can be anything. I keep mine by my bed. One of my favorite “old timers” keeps his in the freezer. Then he can tell the newcomers he keeps his mom on ice. (A little recovery humor.)

When I start obsessing over the problem, I remind myself that the problem is in the God box. God, I’m sure, doesn’t give it a priority. It’s simply a trick to keep my mind from racing so fast. It helps me let go when I’m being stubborn.

Sure, I could put all of my problems in the God box right away and enjoy much more serenity, but I’m slow to let go. I think I’ll be in recovery forever.

The post God In A Box VS. A God Box appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

Bachelorette’s Craig Robinson Quits Cocaine

From Maria Pasquini @ People: Bachelorette alum Craig Robinson is opening up about his struggle with drugs and how the depth of his addiction led him to attempt to take his own life last year.

Even before Robinson competed for the heart of Ali Fedotowsky during the sixth season of The Bachelorette in 2010, he had begun using cocaine on a regular basis.

In an interview on the Reality Steve podcastthis link opens in a new tab, the former reality star shared that he was 18 when he tried the drug for the first time.

“There’s drug addicts that enjoy opiates or enjoy smoking pot or things of that nature where they enjoy to be mellow, to be brought down a bit. I always liked to be up in the sky. To feel the rush that cocaine gave me,” he explained.

After first experimenting with cocaine, Robinson says he “started to do it if not every weekend, at least twice a month throughout college,” although he still continued to do well in school — and eventually law school.

The former reality star went on to share that following his time on The Bachelorette, his drug use “ramped up” because he was suddenly getting “paid to go to parties and just go drink and be offered drugs.”

Robinson’s cocaine use steadily progressed over the years, until it became a daily habit about three years ago, during which time he became “miserable” about the frequency of his usage.

“Most of my days consisted of first of all trying to tell myself and pep talk myself into saying this is the last time,” he shared, adding that during this period of his life, he would stay up for “several days straight” using the drug.

Robinson had also been greatly affected by the death of Bachelor contestant Gia Allemand in 2014, after which began working with the Philadelphia Chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

Although his involvement with the foundation stemmed from a desire to help others, there was also a personal factor at play. “I was getting to a place in my own mind where I was starting to get those same kind of thoughts,” he explained. “In an ironic way, it was really a way to kind of treat myself and help myself for my own depression and suicidal thoughts.”

Robinson says he hit a low point towards the end of 2017.

“I just knew in my own head that with how deep the situation had gotten, even though I was still functioning at work and being where I needed to be…I really started to realize at that point in time that I wasn’t physically or mentally capable of continuing to work under the addiction that I was under,” he explained.

Robinson left his job in 2018 and for the next four months, until June of that year, he “was in almost pure isolation from the world” and would rarely leave his apartment in Philadelphia.

During that point, Robison says he began “thinking pretty deeply” about suicide. That month, Robinson did try to take his life, but was unable to go through with it.

One day that summer, on the way to the train station, Robinson opened up to his father about what was going on in his life.

“I felt like I was taking a train to my own death,” he remarked.

Robinson checked into a rehab facility in Pennsylvania, and after spending 30 days there, he was transferred to another rehab facility in Florida. Since getting out of rehab in November, he has stayed sober and moved down to Florida.

“I decided to move down here because I developed a really strong group of people down here, friends that are sober and know the lay of the land and how to stay sober and have fun in sobriety,” Robinson explained.

“That’s really what I needed,” he continued. “Just to hear that things were gonna be okay. There was hope out there.”

The post Bachelorette’s Craig Robinson Quits Cocaine appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

How to Fight Suicide: One Parent’s Plan

From David Brooks @ The New York Times: Agnes McKeen, who lost her son to suicide, is working to help those who have suffered heal. Agnes McKeen lives in Klamath Falls, Ore. About three years ago, at 16, Agnes’s son Harrison took his own life.

“In losing Harrison I lost all direction for every ounce of love that a mother has for her child; I lost any idea of where to direct that love. Just because Harrison’s gone doesn’t mean my love for him went away,” she says.

“And I had to learn to love that which is not physically here. And now my son’s energy is woven into the fabric of the universe, and that’s where I directed my love. … So now my love goes to the community.”

She expresses it by trying to help people prevent suicide and deal with the grief that comes in its wake.

You’ve probably seen the recent statistics about the suicide epidemic — that suicide rates over all have risen by over 30 percent this century; that teenage suicides are rising at roughly twice that rate; that every year 45,000 Americans kill themselves.

And yet we don’t talk about it much. It’s uncomfortable. Some people believe the falsehood that if we talk about suicide, it will plant the idea in the minds of vulnerable people. Many of us don’t know what to say or do.

A person may be at risk of committing suicide when he or she expresses hopelessness or self-loathing, when he or she starts joking about “after I’m gone,” starts giving away prized possessions, seems preoccupied with death, suddenly withdraws or suddenly appears calm after a period of depression, as if some decision has been made.

When you’re around somebody like that, don’t try to argue with her or him. Don’t say, “You have so much to live for!” Or, “Do you realize how much this will devastate the people around you?” If you gasp or act shocked you’ll burden the person with even more shame and guilt, pushing that person even harder to withdraw.

Sufferers will often lie about their plans. According to one study, 80 percent of suicide victims deny suicidal thoughts before killing themselves. The first thing to do, Agnes advises, is validate their feelings: “I can only imagine what you’re feeling right now.” Then ask directly: “Are you thinking about ending your life?” Remember, the person in front of you is only contemplating suicide because he thinks it is the only way to get out of the pain.

Your next job is to help them cope. People contemplating suicide are often in the grips of a temporary mood catastrophe, to which they unfortunately see a permanent solution.

The pain is real but not forever. Most people who attempt suicide and fail are later glad they failed. Get them to talk about the pain, so they can understand its contours. Ask them to journal their thoughts. Over time most of them will see that there is a compulsive voice in their head telling them that they are worthless and that there is no hope, and that this voice is a lying voice.

The voice may be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. Ask them to write down a life plan for those moments when the lying voice gets loudest: Who will they call? Where will they go? Hang the contact information right on the wall. Don’t let such a person swear you to secrecy. You’re going to find more help. Try anti-suicide apps, like Tec-Tec, available through Apple or Amazon.

We also need to go broader. Suicide is a societal problem. It’s strongly associated with social isolation. Men die at higher rates than women, single people more than married people, rural people more than urban people, Native Americans and whites more than blacks or Latinos.

It’s also a values problem. Our individualistic culture means there are vast empty gaps in our social fabric where people suffer alone and invisible. It’s also a guns problem. A lot of people die simply because at their lowest moment, there happened to be a gun around.

Agnes wrote to me that if you meet someone who has lost someone to suicide, there are better ways to begin a conversation. “SAY THEIR LOVED ONE’S NAME!” Share a memory. When you ask how the survivor is doing, don’t let her say, “It’s not about me.” Because it is, and about her recovery.

Agnes believes in professional help but says what’s really necessary is belonging and peer counseling, “people pouring their heart out, and it creates the mentality that, ‘if they can do it, I can do it.’ … Give folks a feeling of hope that we can rise out of this and we can do it together.”

Her life has been messy, like a lot of lives, but Agnes has a hard-earned wisdom. “I woke back up after losing Harrison on Dec. 28, 2015. I was sitting on my front porch talking to Harrison like I still do. I said, ‘Gosh darn it, Harrison, didn’t you know how much I loved you!’ I felt him move through me. I could feel the warmth, like you get when you wrap your hands around a cup of coffee. And I heard him say, ‘Of course I know, Ma.’ I felt him.”

The post How to Fight Suicide: One Parent’s Plan appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

Do You Say Sorry Too Much?

From Daniella Balarezo @ TED: When we needlessly apologize, we end up making ourselves small and diminishing what we’re trying to express, says sociologist Maja Jovanovic.

Think about all the times you use the word “sorry” in a typical day. There are the necessary “sorry”s — when you bump into someone, when you need to cancel plans with a friend. But what about the unnecessary “sorry”s? The “sorry, this may be an obvious idea” at a meeting, the “sorry to cause trouble” when rescheduling a haircut, the “sorry, there’s a spill in the dairy aisle” at the supermarket.

Canadian sociologist Maja Jovanovic believes the “sorry”s we sprinkle through our days hurt us. They make us appear smaller and more timid than we really are, and they can undercut our confidence.

Jovanovic, who teaches at McMaster University and Mohawk College in Hamilton, Ontario, became interested in this topic when she attended a conference four years ago. The four women on a panel were, she says, “experts in their chosen fields. Among them, they had published hundreds of academic articles, dozens of books. All they had to do was introduce themselves. The first woman takes a microphone and she goes, ‘I don’t know what I could possibly add to this discussion’ … The second woman takes the microphone and says, ‘Oh my gosh, I thought they sent the email to the wrong person. I’m just so humbled to be here.’” The third and fourth women did the same thing.

During the 25 panels at that week-long conference, recalls Jovanovic, “not once did I hear a man take that microphone and discount his accomplishments or minimize his experience. Yet every single time a woman took a microphone, an apologetic tone was sure to follow.” She adds, “I found it enraging; I also found it heartbreaking.”

Jovanovic found the outside world not so different: “Apologies have become our habitual way of communicating,” she says. Since then, she’s collected needless apologies from her colleagues and students. One stand-out? “My research assistant said ‘Sorry’ to the pizza delivery guy for his being late to her house,” says Jovanovic. “She said, ‘Oh my gosh, we live in a new subdevelopment. I’m so sorry. Did you have trouble finding this place?’”

We can eliminate the “sorry”s from our sentences — and still be considerate. “The next time you bump into someone,” Jovanovic says, “you could say, ‘Go ahead,’ ‘After you’ or ‘Pardon me.’” Similarly, during a meeting, Jovanovic says, “instead of saying, ‘Sorry to interrupt you,’ why not try ‘How about,’ ‘I have an idea,’ ‘I’d like to add’ or ‘Why don’t we try this.’” The idea is to be polite while not minimizing yourself.

The “sorry”s that fill our written interactions also need to be noticed — and banished. For emails, Jovanovic says, “There’s a Google Chrome plug-in called ‘just not sorry’ that will alert you to all the needless apologies.” With texts, she points out, “Every single one of us has responded to a text you got when you weren’t able to respond right away. What did you say? ‘Sorry.’” She says, “Don’t apologize — say, ‘I was working,’ ‘I was reading,’ ‘I was driving, ‘I was trying to put on Spanx.’ Whatever it is, it’s all good. You don’t have to apologize.”

And, in some of the instances when we’d typically throw in a “sorry,” we could just use the two magic words: “thank you.”

Jovanovic tells of the moment when she realized the effectiveness of gratitude. She says, “Four of us were at a restaurant for a work meeting, and we’re waiting for number five to arrive … I put my sociological cap on, and I thought, ‘What would he say? How many apologies will he give?’ I could barely stand the anticipation. He arrives at the restaurant, and you know what he says? ‘Hey, thanks for waiting.’ … The rest of us said, “Yeah, you’re welcome,” and we all just opened our menus and ordered. Life went on, and everything was fine.”

Another time when “thank you” can work better than “sorry”? When you’re with a friend and you realize you’ve been doing all the talking. Jovanovic says, “instead of saying, ‘Sorry for complaining’ or ‘Sorry for venting,’ you could just say, ‘Thank you for listening,’ ‘Thank you for being there’ or ‘Thank you for being my friend.’”

Besides removing them from our own communications, we should tell other people when they’re overdoing their “sorry”s, suggests Jovanovic. You can start with your family and friends — and if you’d like, go beyond them. She says, “I have been interrupting these apologies for three years now. I’ll do it everywhere. I’ll do it in the parking lot, I’ll do it to total strangers at the grocery store, in line somewhere. One hundred percent of the time when I interrupt another woman and I say, ‘Why did you just say sorry for that?’ she’ll say to me, ‘I don’t know.’”

The post Do You Say Sorry Too Much? appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

Are Social Media & Anxiety Making NBA Players Miserable?

From Lisa Redmond @ NBC News: Is social media hurting the mental health of NBA players and making them miserable?

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver sparked the debate when he voiced his concerns about the mental health of players in the league and what he sees as a direct corelation to social media is becoming of extreme importance.

“I think we live a bit in the age of anxiety,” Silver said speaking at the MIT Sloan Sports Analytics Conference last week.

“I’ve read studies on this. I think part of it is a direct product of social media. I think those players we’re talking about, when I meet with them, what strikes me is that they are truly unhappy. This is not some like, you know, show they’re putting on for the media. When you have relations with a lot of players, when I’m one-on-one with a lot of these guys, I think to the outside world they see the fame, the money, all the trappings that go with it. They’re the best in the world at what they do. They say, ‘how is it possible, like, they can even be complaining?’ I hear this on television all the time. A lot of these young men are genuinely unhappy.”

Retired NBA player turned TNT analyst Charles Barley said Silver’s comments were “the stupidest thing” he’s ever heard the Commissioner say. “These guys are making 20, 30, 40 million dollars a year. They work six, seven months a year,” he said this week. “They stay in the best hotels in the world — they ain’t got no problems. That’s total bogus.”

But on the latest episode of the Wizards Talk podcast, NBC Sports Washington analyst and former NBA player Tony Massenburg agreed with Silver’s thoughts on the effects social media is having on mental health – but thinks it’s not just limited to the league.

“There’s no question in my mind,” Massenburg said.

“I agree with him that some players are not happy. Not all, but there are some players that are not happy. And it has less to do with the NBA than I think people may try to put on it. To me it has more to do with society. We have a lot of unhappy people in society today because of social media, and social media rules the NBA at this point. It’s all about your Instagram and your Twitter and your Facebook and whatever.

… Guys I think right now are struggling. Some are struggling with mental health because there’s more attention and more focus paid to that from a societal prospective. We are more conscious of mental health. It’s not about the mental health of NBA players in my mind. Everything that happens in society mirrors every league…and so when we see culture shifts or societal shifts, meaning I heard Adam Silver say you know guys isolate themselves, they’re sitting in their locker with their headphones on. They’re on the plane or the bus with their headphones on. Well that’s what people are doing in society.

“So for NBA players, yeah they probably are a little bit more reclusive now because there’s so much attention put on them that they literally can’t get out of the spotlight,” he continued. “And for some guys who really value their family time and their private time or just having a moment where they’re not under the spotlight, that can be a real mental hurdle.”

The post Are Social Media & Anxiety Making NBA Players Miserable? appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

What’s In Your Recovery First Aid Kit?

Addiction is actually the very opposite of taking care of your needs, so we need many tools in our recovery first aid kit. Self care both for people struggling with addictions, and for their loved ones simply doesn’t exist. There is a kind of destructive conditioning that takes place that has to be replaced with loving self care in every area. Here’s what recovery healing looks like.

For those new to recovery, not using is the first victory. means you’re in recovery. The next recovery victory is healing and balancing each of these five areas.

Physical Healing

We list physical health at the top of the list because it sets the basis for all healing. Following the basics of physical health is an essential foundation for the other four areas of recovery healing. Physical health entails seven basics. If you didn’t learn them as children, now’s the time.

Eat healthy. Living on junk food, snack bars, Starbucks sugary/caffeine drinks, chips, and candy alone can sabotage your success. Have real food at breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Give your brain and body the nourishment it needs to heal from neglect. This includes: good protein, fruits, vegetables, healthy fat and carbs.
Get enough rest. Don’t over-do-it as you have done in the past. Either too much caring for others or too much partying makes you sleep deprived. Stop. Rest more. Take some time to just relax and let go. But most of all, sleep, sleep, sleep.
Exercise 5 times per week. All right, this may seem excessive, but exercise can be a half an hour walk. It can mean taking the stairs instead of the elevator. It can mean yoga, or dance or any number of activities that get you moving. Just move is the operative exercise word.
Seek medical help as needed. Don’t wait when you have symptoms.
Take medications as prescribed. This is critical if you need meds for your addiction recovery or other mental illness.
Maintain basic hygiene. Take showers, wash your hair, hands and face, brush your teeth. Keep your clothes clean. Change your clothes. Do all the self care necessary to look and feel good.
Stay clean and sober. You may be taking meds to stay off your drug of choice or a medication for depression. For our purposes, you are clean and sober if you’re doing what your doctor or addiction plan tells you to do.

Emotional Healing

Our emotional lives are also often neglected when dealing with addiction. Neglected emotions can cause problems such as denial, anger outbursts, unresolved grief, and depression. There are many ways to focus on feelings. It means allowing yourself to feel but not allow your feelings to rule your life.

Feel your feelings, but don’t get stuck in them. Feelings aren’t good or bad, they just are. You can feel mad as long as you don’t act out your anger on others, or have anger rule your emotional state.
Journal about you thoughts and feelings. Writing helps to get it out. When you write about it, you are letting it go.
Talk to family and friends, or a therapist. Talking is another way to loosen your feelings and help overcome the negative ones.
Be Creative. Find a way to express yourself. Personal expression includes: color in a coloring book, bake, paint pictures, learn to cook, sing in a choir, or plant a garden.
Get out in nature. Just look at what’s around you, get your feet planted on the ground. Experience the seasons.
Play with children. Enjoy play and show the children in your life you have time and emotional space for them.
Cry over a sad or happy movie. Some people are so hurt by their experiences, it’s hard to cry or laugh. Movies can help access those feelings, and the tears from relating to stories on the screen can bring some relief.
Attend support groups such as AA, NA, Al-Anon, Codependency Anonymous, or Emotions Anonymous, or a grief support group or a spiritual group.
Find a therapist or do family therapy. It helps. It really helps to have a professional in your life to guide you through the healing process.

Intellectual Healing

This doesn’t have to be a scary word. Throughout our lives, we have to keep our brains active for many reasons. Whatever schooling we had, it’s not enough to help our coping skills now. We need to keep learning new things, or we’ll be stuck in old destructive habits.  We have to continue to engage with new ideas and activities.

Think on positive things in your life and community. Keep up on positive recovery and health news.
Stay connected and interested in others around you. What are they doing and thinking? What tools do they use to keep positive?
Learn something new, maybe a language or a recipe. Take up a sport you haven’t tried.
Listen to books on tape or read.
Attend classes or return to school.
Write about your life, also called journaling.
Do puzzles and Sudoku. We also love Scrabble.
Explore ideas about your job, how can you do it better, or enjoy it more.

Relational Healing

While many focus on this aspect as being in relationship with others, we believe that it is a 2-part-process. Step one is relationships with others and step two is a relationship with ourselves.

Engage in activities with friends and family such as going to movies, out to dinner, and spending time talking about thoughts and feelings.
Attend support groups. These can be religious/spiritual groups/book groups.
Exercise with others. This includes playing sports, walking with a friend, doing yoga, or anything that involves movement.
Volunteer to help others. Service is an important component of healing. Anything you do for others counts to help you heal from whatever trauma you have experienced.
Get love and give love and support. Giving is important, getting love and support is important, too.
Nurture non family relationships with neighbors, your kids’ teachers, co-workers and others. This is part of staying connected.
Enjoy alone time. Occasionally, take a time out from everything and everybody else. It’s good to take a nap, read a book, watch your favorite show alone, soak in the tub if you enjoy baths.

Spiritual Healing

Spirituality is what makes our spirits soar. Here we connect to life and the living. Here we also connect to a sense of well-being, of peace, compassion, and acceptance. We may connect to a Higher Power – or not. But we feel a connection that is beyond our self. Everything that we do that is about healing is about the spiritual, for spirituality encompasses us in our entirety.

Breathe in for five counts, hold for five counts and breathe out for five counts. Yoga breathing slows your heart and helps to calm your spirit. When you are counting your breath, you’re not focused on what makes you mad, sad, or afraid.
Play with your pet. Enough said. This activity is known to lift your spirits.
Meditate. This is a catch word everyone is using these days. Meditation works for those who can still still and concentrate long enough to do it. Not everyone can. Listen to a meditation tape and see it if can work for you.
Pray means reaching above the everyday for positive energy. You don’t have to pray to any particular God for prayer to ease your spirit.
Attend religious and/or spiritual services. Research shows that people who attends services live longer. But organized religion is not for everyone.
Teach compassion and tolerance to your children. This is for everyone.
Feel joy and sorrow, and accept all. This is not as touchy feely as it sounds. There are many parts of life. Rarely does a human experience only the good, warm and supportive. Acceptance of what is and can’t be controlled is a very important part of recovery healing.

When we break down each of these 5 areas of recovery healing, we can see things we already do and perhaps, new things to do. We understand that these 5 areas weave in and out of one another.  For example, going jogging helps us physically, increases our endorphins which make us feel good emotionally, gives us time to be alone or with others, and may help us to get into a sense of connection to life as we take in the beauty that surrounds us. These are the ways to live a fulfilling, healthy life.

If you need help with addiction or mental health, check out Recovery Guidance for a free resource to locate professionals near you.

The post What’s In Your Recovery First Aid Kit? appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

Is Addiction An Opportunity?

Years ago, I studied “The Hero’s Journey” because I wanted to write the hero’s story. Back in the day, we girls didn’t think of ourselves as taking that hero’s journey ourselves. We weren’t brave. We were just girls. But I thought if I ever had the opportunity, I could write about it. I could write a column for a newspaper, or a bestselling novel, maybe win an academy award, if I ever wrote a movie.

But it was just a dream to keep me going. In those days, I had no way of knowing that girls would be soldiers, would win Nobel prizes, and not just work at high level jobs, they would run companies, even countries. It was unthinkable. But it happened in one generation.

Recovery Begins As A Way To Survive

Addiction recovery is a little like the evolution of the female in the 20th Century. And it might be helpful to think about it that way. Recovery begins as just a way to survive, like my dream to write. But the empowerment recovery brings often takes people beyond any goal they could possible set for themselves. Recovery can relieve the pain of family traumas and bring peace. That’s a positive feature of addiction that hasn’t been examined or talked about much. Even if we lose the battle for someone we love, recovery and a new desire to help others restores us.

Advantage Over Other Diseases: The Doc is Not In Control of the Treatment

Surprisingly, there is an upside to having addiction as opposed to some other deadly disease. Addiction is not the only progressive disease that can kill you if you don’t get treatment for it, but it is the only disease for which only the patient can decide the outcome. The doctor is not in charge. The patient is in charge. The patient can say, yes. Or no. When the patient says yes, and begins to let go, a real change occurs.

Change Happens Because Of Personal Choice

This change can’t be court- or parent- ordered. It can’t be therapied away. Or rehab mandated. The change comes about almost entirely by embracing the illness. A totally weird concept so counter-intuitive not everyone can do it. It’s very scary. Imagine embracing cancer, and then getting well. Imagine embracing depression and getting well. It’s a different kind of embrace, of course, from the “I love you embrace” that originally feeds the addiction. It’s more like “yeah, that was me. I did it. It worked for a while, but now I’m done.” And that idea has to take root and be embraced every day. Just think for a minute how hard that is to do.

Care-givers have a specially difficult journey that’s also not talked about enough. To give up what you love the most, whether it’s a drug, or a loved one, is the bravest thing a person can do and it makes heroes of us all. Can you think of the addiction in your life as an opportunity?

The post Is Addiction An Opportunity? appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.

10 Rules For Healthly Relationships

From the University of Minnesota Rochester: Healthy relationships have been shown to increase our happiness, improve health and reduce stress. Studies show that people with healthy relationships have more happiness and less stress. There are basic ways to make relationships healthy, even though each relationship is different. These tips apply to all kinds of relationships: friendships, work and family relationships, and romantic partnerships.

1. Keep Expectations Realistic

No one can be everything we might want them to be. Healthy relationships mean accepting people as they are and not trying to change them.

2. Talk With Each Other

It can’t be said enough: communication is essential to healthy relationships.

Take the time. Really be there.
Genuinely listen. Do not interrupt or plan what you’re going to say next. Try to fully understand their perspective.
Ask questions. Show you are interested. Ask about their experiences, feelings, opinions, and interests.
Share information. Studies show that sharing information helps relationships begin. Let people know who you are, but don’t overwhelm with too much personal information too soon.

3. Be Flexible

It is natural to feel uneasy about changes. Healthy relationships allow for change and growth.

4. Take Care Of Yourself, Too

Healthy relationships are mutual, with room for both people’s needs.

5. Be Dependable

If you make plans with someone, follow through. If you take on a responsibility, complete it. Healthy relationships are trustworthy.

6. Fight Fair

Most relationships have some conflict. It only means you disagree about something; it does not have to mean you don’t like each other.

Cool down before talking. The conversation will be more productive if you have it when your emotions have cooled off a little, so you don’t say something you may regret later.
Use “I statements.” Share how you feel and what you want without assigning blame or motives. E.g. “When you don’t call me, I start to feel like you don’t care about me” vs. “You never call me when you’re away. I guess I’m the only one who cares about this relationship.”
Keep your language clear and specific. Try to factually describe behavior that you are upset with, avoiding criticism and judgment. Attack the problem, not the person.
Focus on the current issue. The conversation is likely to get bogged down if you pile on everything that bothers you. Avoid using “always” and “never” language and address one issue at a time.
Take responsibility for mistakes. Apologize if you have done something wrong; it goes a long way toward setting things right again.
Recognize some problems are not easily solved. Not all differences or difficulties can be resolved. You are different people, and your values, beliefs, habits, and personality may not always be in alignment. Communication goes a long way toward helping you understand each other and address concerns, but some things are deeply rooted and may not change significantly. It is important to figure out for yourself what you can accept, or when a relationship is no longer healthy for you.

7. Be Affirming

According to relationship researcher John Gottman, happy couples have a ratio of 5 positive interactions or feelings for every 1 negative interaction or feeling. Express warmth and affection!

8. Keep Your Life Balanced

Other people help make our lives satisfying but they cannot meet every need. Find what interests you and become involved. Healthy relationships have room for outside activities.

9. It’s A Process

It might look like everyone on campus is confident and connected, but most people share concerns about fitting in and getting along with others. It takes time to meet people and get to know them. Healthy relationships can be learned and practiced, and keep getting better.

10. Be Yourself!

It’s much easier and more fun to be authentic than to pretend to be something or someone else. Healthy relationships are made of real people.

Adapted from Kansas State University (2006) and the Peer Advocates of Sexual Respect at UMR College (2007).

The post 10 Rules For Healthly Relationships appeared first on Reach Out Recovery.