Margaret McSweeney's Blog, page 60

Be Filled

I didn’t think I was guilty of spoiling my children. Then I cleaned out the closets. I have definitely participated in overindulgence.

Why do we have so much stuff?

I filled at least five big garbage bags of old stuffed animals, unopened crafts, half done word puzzles, clothes(some still with price tags), and shoes. After doing my mission of closet reduction, I organized the things to be kept and returned each to its appropriate space.

I was feeling pretty good about completing my project. I love having things in a nice order. Then it hit me! The orderly closets weren’t as trim as I had expected- they were still full.

How could it be?

It’s the sickness of too much stuff. Affluenza.

How can parents inoculate themselves and their kids from this disease?

Here are a few ideas:

Organize. Take an inventory of things already purchased. Keep like items together so they are easily located. When something is needed shop at home first.

Say, “No.” Resist impulse purchases. Shop for what is only on the list. Any other items wanted can go on the “gift wish list”.

Pray. Ask God for abundance in terms of love, grace, peace, and mercy. These are the most beautiful things to possess.

The desire for more stuff just feeds on itself, don’t you think? But…we can never get or give too much love, grace, peace, and mercy. This is ultimately what satisfies. I pray the chambers of my heart and my kids’ hearts will be filled to an abundant overflowing with these qualities.

“Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance.” Jude 2

What ideas can you share that prevent overindulgence?

What’s in Your Heart?

What makes your heart skip a beat? Is there anything that gets you so riled up, it actually keeps you up at night?

For me, it’s the odd old man who lives down the street. Sounds a little strange, doesn’t it?

If you could see what I see, you might think so, too. Every morning, as I walk my dog, I see this man digging in his front yard. He’s been doing it for weeks, and he’s so focused on his work that he doesn’t even look up as I step next to a bush across the street and allow my dog to do his business.

The shovel goes in. The dirt flies up.

This is the thing that originally started my blood boiling. I became fixated on how I could get this man to notice me. I shouted “hello”. I waved. I called “Good morning.” But nothing worked.

And then one day, just as I opened my door to let my little Yorkie out for his morning run, I saw the guy approaching me. Only he wasn’t approaching me. He wasn’t even looking at me. He was fixated on the ground and the lone, smashed can that was lying there. And then he did something—something so unexpected and yet so utterly perplexing that I paused to take note—he reached down and picked up a discarded can. Then, without missing a beat, he continued walking until he came upon a trash can waiting by the road and tossed it in.

Unassuming. Not a big deal. Just a guy picking up some trash and putting it in—of all things—an actual trash can.

On other days, I saw him step across neatly manicured lawns to retrieve stray papers or water bottles that had found their way out of someone’s careless hands or the whims of the wind on recycling day. Unfailingly, he would find the nearest receptacle and toss it in.

The old man is somewhat of an enigma. Not much of a talker. We haven’t been formally introduced. And I still have no idea why he is digging that hole in his front yard.

But nowadays, I find myself embarking on a morning treasure hunt of my own. I’m competing in an unofficial contest to seek and destroy neighborhood debris with this man I don’t even know. I must beat him at his own game, a game he doesn’t even know we’re playing!

If this stranger who lives right down the street from me, who can’t even say hello or wave to me from his front yard can find room in his heart to make the world a better place, then surely I can find a way to do the same. Because you see—what was in his heart spilled over and filled up mine. Without a formal introduction or even a cursory glance, this man influenced my life in a very positive way.

Now, I’m picking up trash, too. Maybe one day, we’ll both see the same discarded bottle, rush to pick it up, bump heads, and say, “Excuse me. Have we met? I was tidying up the ‘hood a bit. It’s a great morning to be alive, isn’t it?”

“Why yes, yes, it is. Have you seen the amazing hole I’m digging in my front yard?”

We’ll have a nice little chuckle and continue on our merry way.

That’s my dream, anyway. Remember, this is the very thing that keeps me up at night!

What’s in your heart? Is it overflowing with compassion? Gratitude? Love? Responsibility? When you allow what fills you to overflow, you give others the opportunity to lap up a little bit of your gift. And the amazing thing about the goodness that comes from Christ, is that he’s pretty good at multiplying gifts.

All this time, I thought the old man was the one toting a heart full of garbage. But maybe it was me. I’m the one who was so focused on figuring out why that guy wouldn’t talk to me, so much so that I almost missed the fact that he’s a guy who cares deeply about the street we call home. Without ever uttering a single word, the old guy from down the street taught me a valuable lesson about what’s really in his heart. He inspired me, not only to join him in his crusade for cleanliness, but also to figure out how I, too, can share with others what’s in my heart.

“As water reflects the face, so a man’s heart reflects the man.” (Proverbs 27:19, NIV)

Meet the Pearl Girls: Sarah Wauterlek

Meet Pearl Girl, Sarah Wauterlek! Sarah is a travel enthusiast, photographer, runner, foodie, writer, teacher, adventure-seeker, lover of laughter, lover of people, and lover of life. In the last five years, she has found that life is full of great adventure and satisfaction when you say “yes” to the opportunities that you are given and in return you give back to those in need. She is the founder of Sarah Wauterlek Photography (www.sarahwauterlekphotography.com) and author of the book, Young Widow: A Memoir. You can connect with Sarah on her blog or Facebook.

 [image error]Share a little about how you became a writer.

Since childhood, I have kept a journal and spent time writing stories and poetry. Any written assignments in school were the easiest for me as I have always enjoyed writing and done quite well at it. It wasn’t until the last couple of years or so that I had anything published. I had written a few articles here and there but I published my first book, Young Widow: A Memoir, after feeling led by God to do so. It was one of the scariest things I have ever done as worried about making my private life public. I now consider it one of the best things that I have ever done.

Favorite Scripture or Life Verse.

Nahum 1:7 “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him.”

It was the only verse that was underlined in my late husband’s Bible.

What motivates you to write for charity?

I feel passionately that we are called to use our gifts to serve the Lord. He has presented me with opportunities to write for charity and so I am honored to do so. Also, as co-founder of a travel business that combines luxury travel and charity work, it is easy for me to do so!

Favorite Food.

Figs, cheese, and ice cream

If you were stuck on a deserted island, what are 5 things that you’d have to have with you?

Runnning shoes, music, Bible, journal and camera.

 

Wisdom From A Battlefield

Wisdom from a Battlefield

Are the pages on your calendar turning as quickly as mine appear to be? It seems like just a short time ago we welcomed summer and now here it is—October. I wish time would move a bit slower because I like this month. Cooler temperatures are replacing summer’s heat and we have a bit of time, if we’ll take advantage of it, to slow down and enjoy nature’s gifts in the richness of autumn before the busyness of the holiday season kicks in.

I’ll celebrate my older son’s birthday this month. And I’ll also take time to honor friends and family members who are pausing to celebrate the gift of life. They are breast cancer survivors and the families and friends who love them.

Women (and men, too) are treasuring the gift of life each day as they battle cancer. I have neighbors, friends, business associates, family members, and fellow church members who are learning how to survive its havoc and cherish each day as they move on with their lives. It’s likely this disease has touched your circle of family and friends as well. Perhaps it has become a part of your own life journey.

There are some whose fight with this disease is well known to us while others face cancer’s challenges quietly, and we are unaware. Yet in many ways, it touches us all.

God has given me opportunities to walk alongside some courageous women as they battle breast cancer. On this journey, they’re the teacher and I’m the student. Their strength, wisdom, courage, and honesty have influenced me in countless ways. So, in their honor, I’ll share a few of the life lessons I’m learning—pearls of wisdom to reflect on as we move through October’s National Breast Cancer Awareness.

* Cancer is no respecter of persons. It invades the lives of men and women from all walks of life, regardless of age, background, financial status, or spiritual journey.

* Life is not always fair.

* You may not have a choice about what comes into your life but you do have a choice about how you will respond and the attitude you will choose to have as you move through the experience. Will you see yourself as a victim or a survivor?

* Battling cancer is hard work.

* It’s important to take charge of your life and your health. Understand how your body functions and then make healthy lifestyle choices. When in doubt, ask, and keep on asking until you understand.

* Some of the most beautiful women I know are bald.

* Planning for the future is important, but the reality is this: you have the certainty of only this present moment. How will you make it count?

* Don’t take anything for granted.

* The journey of life takes unexpected twists and turns. While we’re each responsible for how we travel along that path, we don’t have to make the trip alone. Friends and family are waiting to come alongside with assistance and companionship.

* Laughter is great medicine.

* Encouragement is a priceless gift.

* Prayer is powerful, not just for the one with the need being voiced, but also for the one offering the prayer. God’s mercy and grace are sufficient for each day as we draw close to him. As we pour out our hearts and as we experience the peace that only he can give.

* Don’t save the good china just for company.

* When you think you can’t take another step, stop and rest. Then take a deep breath and dig into the center of your soul where you’ll find God’s strength and courage for the next step.

* We all have much to teach each other, and much to learn. Take time to share those life lessons with those around you, and listen.

* Never give up. Never.

* Take time, each day, to celebrate the gift of life, and to thank God for the blessings He gives, even in the midst of the battle.

To those of you who are cancer survivors yourselves or perhaps friends or family members of someone who has been battling this disease, I offer my respect, love, encouragement, and prayers. I also give my commitment to make the lessons of your life count in my life, and to share those pearls of wisdom with others.

God bless you.

Take a Second Look

Take a Second Look

When we see a beautiful woman, we try not to stare. And yet, there is just something within us that wants to take a second look, to identify that special something that makes her so attractive. That’s how I am feeling as I read about this beautiful Woman of Virtue in Proverbs 31 this morning. I feel compelled to take a second look at the opening lines of this poem before moving on. I especially love the King James Version:

“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10KJV

I love the wording of it. It’s so lovely and stately and, well, beautiful! It’s worth taking a second look at, because just as the subject matter, the words are stunning! They stop you in your tracks when you read them because you know that if a woman like this should come along, she would stop you in your tracks as well. She would command your attention. She would not be your average Walmart shopper!

But there is something else here that I appreciate. King James uses the word woman instead of wife. Most popular versions of the text address her as wife. The Message is a bit more aimed at the Walmart shopper, losing the loveliness with, “a good woman is hard to find”. Sounds a bit rugged for describing someone, as it continues, who is “worth more than diamonds”. I guess this good woman in The Message is a diamond in the rough!

Lest I digress, the point I am reaching is that singleness does not exclude us from being a virtuous, valuable, desirable, beautiful woman! So, I don’t want our single female friends to check out and think this passage is not for you. Ladies, this is for all of us because, in truth, the King’s momma is describing a woman who is already totally at peace within herself before she ever finds a mate. How else would she logically be able to recommend this woman to her son as his bride? She would have to be SINGLE!

What makes this woman so beautiful?

It’s what is radiating from within, it’s the condition of her “inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” I Peter 3:4

But it’s so much more than that! This woman is not needy for a man to fill the hole in her heart. She walks with confidence and inner peace because she is already IN a love relationship!

The love that shaped her in her mother’s womb.

The love that called out to Israel.

The love that died for us and cries for us.

This woman is loved by the Creator of the universe, and she knows it in the very innermost part of her being. It is woven into the fiber of her heart and soul. And, because of that, SHE loves! She LoVeS! She LOVES because she knows she is loved. She loves because she has discovered the truth of God’s love:

“God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God and God in them.”IJohn 4:16

And because she has fully embraced God’s love, she is empowered by the very LOVE that is required to follow the command of Christ:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength…Love your neighbor as yourself.”Mark12:30-31

Are you feeling very single? Alone? Unloving? Unloved?

When I found myself feeling very alone, betrayed, and deserted after my husband’s suicide, the words of Isaiah 54 brought healing to my heart. Below is a portion, but take some time to read the entire passage.

“For your Maker is your husband—

the LORD Almighty is his name—

the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;

he is called the God of all the earth.”

Isaiah 54:5

MY PRAYER FOR YOU TODAY:

“For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” ~Ephesians 3:14-21

The Way to Live a Life of Abundance

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. ~John 10:10 (ESV)

Recently while reading through the book of John I came across John 10:10 and wondered what it means to live a life abundantly. While researching what it means to live an abundant life I found many self-help messages. Is remembering 7 Steps to Living a Life of Abundance really what it means?

Lately I have struggled with the thief who tries to steal, kill and destroy instead of feeling like I am living an abundant life. Opportunities were met with closed doors; kids try your patience; and husbands who are always on the go. Friends who have cancer, others who are adjusting to a life they did not plan, and family members who are struggling with loss. Father how do I live a life of abundance in the midst of all this pain?

The Greek word that we translate as ‘full’ or ‘abundantly’ is perissos (per-is-sos’) – which means ‘more than sufficient’ or ‘over & above what is required’.

There is a scene in the movie Wall-E where the Captain says, “I don’t want to survive, I want to live.” That quote made me realize we often lose sight of the fact that God does not want us to just survive life; he wants the very best for us.

There is pain in this life, yet he provides the perfect peace. (Isa. 26:3)

When you lose your patience, God provides us with the strength to persevere. (Nehemiah 8:10)

When life does not go as planned, God is not caught off guard. (Jeremiah 29:11)

The world defines abundance by WHAT we have, but God’s definition of abundance is WHO we have. God sent Jesus to this earth so we may live a life of abundance in the midst of our imperfections and pain. He does not want us to only survive the trials; he wants us to depend on Jesus and live life to its fullest as we live in dependence up on Him.

Meet the Pearl Girls: Cindi Ferrini

Say hello to Pearl Girl, Cindi Ferrini! Cindi is the co-author of “Unexpected Journey: When Special Needs Change Our Course,” with her husband Joe and has written other materials as well. She’s been interviewed on FOCUS ON THE FAMILY and FAMILYLIFE radio programs. She is a popular key note conference speaker, mother of three (including a son with special needs, Joey, 31 of whom she writes), and grandmother of two. You can learn more and connect her by visiting her website: www.cindiferrini.com.

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Please share a little about how you became a writer.

I became a writer because it was “the next step” in what I was doing. First, I put together some materials for a time management seminar I was doing…then, having the privilege of writing for a prayer spot on the radio got me writing little 2 minute spots…..then, while speaking for FAMILYLIFE we had couples asking if we’d ever written about our son with special needs, and then…………..it started!

Favorite Scripture or Life Verse?

So many favorite verses, but one that rings true for me at all times is Ps. 138:8, “The Lord will accomplish what concerns me.”

What motivates you to write for charity?

I have always desired to say “yes” to the Lord’s direction. When I was asked, I sensed His direction and said “yes”!

4. Favorite Food: This is one area where I am actually adventurous! Even though I was a picky eater as a kid, today that is not the case. I like most everything!

If you were stuck on a deserted island, what are 5 things that you’d have to have with you?

The five things I’d have to have with me on a deserted island would be the Bible, my whole family (is that cheating?), someone who could find food and cook for us, someone who could build shelter for us or teach us how, and DUH, why didn’t I think of this first: a BOAT!

Blessing Your Grandchildren | Mary Lee Moon

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Elsie and Yia Yia

As a new grandmother I wanted to do something that would bless my granddaughter when she turned 18. Not just bless her, but really bless her in a spiritual way. I have found that grandparents have this special thing going with their grandkids. They just do. Maybe it’s because when we spend time with them, it is undivided-all-about-you time. Maybe it’s because, as grandparents, we do not have that sole responsibility of child training, and disciplining, and God directing, and clothes washing, and feeding, and room cleaning, and that continuous cycle of routine and structure that is so important in the physical and spiritual development of every child. Maybe it’s because we just get to love them. We get to enjoy their delight. And when we are tired, we can go home. Oh the pleasure.

In this new season of life, I desired to be called “grandmother”. I loved my sweet grandmother and wanted to be called the same. Even though my sweet grandmother was sweet and OLD, it didn’t stop this young grandmother in wanting the same honor. Grandmother. It suited me nicely; I thought. I worked and worked with Elsie in learning to say this new special word. Actually, I had been practicing it with her, this word that just rolls around your tongue, from the time she was born. Then that day came, and she called me “Yia-Yia”. What? Yea. Yia Yia. Well, it IS Greek for grandmother. Does that count? I tried and tried to change it until the day that cherished baby girl had walked out of my sight behind her house. And I heard, “Yia, Yiaaaaaa”. “Yesssssss,” I answered. And then that precious little voice yelled, “I loooooove you!”

So it is…I’m a Yia Yia. Oh, I wanted to do something so special for this little one. And that’s when I got the idea to start a spiritual journey with Elsie. Not taking over the roll or responsibility of her mom and dad, but adding to it. Kind of like adding marshmallows to hot chocolate every once in a while to make it special. And so the journey began in a journal.

It is a journal that records those moments when a spiritual lessons or principle is learned. An ink handprint or a photograph of us will grace the pages. A journal that records scripture and reminders of encouragement and spiritual growth as this baby girl becomes a big girl and then a woman. A journal that will have my heart felt prayers being lifted up for this precious soul. Years of spiritual advice and love will be handed to her on her 18th birthday. And so I leave you with my very first journal entry. It always starts and ends the same.

Dear Elsie,

I was watching you play in your backyard running around with your arms up in the air and just yelling “Awwwhhhhhh” across the back yard when I thought how precious you are! The joy you have- no cares, lovin’ the outdoors, your smile, your tiny little two year old self-It all reminds me of how special God made you, and I am enjoying EVERY BIT of you! I have already started praying for your salvation and that you will walk closely to the Lord. Someday, we will rejoice when you totally belong to the Maker who desires your devotion and fellowship and purity. God loves you always and forever.

Love you,

Yia Yia

***

Mary Lee Moon lives in Arkansas with her pastor-husband, David.  She loves the simply things in life like fall weather, Friday night family nights,  flower gardens that grow by themselves, and  children. She has four amazing grown children that she homeschooled, two pretty awesome son-in-laws, and two adorable grandchildren. At the present, she gives piano lessons and teaches at an enrichment school. One of her greatest desires is to impart a love for our heavenly Father through prayer, example and encouragement.

More Balancing Life with Kids

As I mentioned last month, it is very hard to balance being a mom and an attorney. I’ve been very blessed that I never worked for a large firm where the rules are harder to modify. Still when I graduated from law school with an eight-month-old, I planned to go from my clerkship to an honors position at the DOJ. It seemed like the perfect plan for a mom trying to balance family life with career.

God had different plans.

The month my clerkship ended and I was supposed to start at the Department of Justice, God moved us from Washington, D.C. to Lafayette, Indiana. Check a map, you’ll find it partway between Chicago and Indianapolis on I-65. My husband had accepted a job at a Big Ten University – the perfect job for him – and it put us closer to family – definitely a goal. But where did it leave me? I didn’t know two people in this new town. I had to take the dreaded bar exam again…ugh! Not exactly the journey I’d signed up for.

Yet I knew without a shadow of a doubt that because this was the perfect move for my husband, then somehow it would be the perfect move for me. We were one, and God wouldn’t have perfection for one with ugliness for the other.

I can’t tell you how many times I told myself that.

With hindsight the reasons are so clear:

1) I wouldn’t be writing. I met my mentor Colleen Coble three years after we moved to Indiana. She threw open the doors on my writing dream. I am so grateful!

2) I probably wouldn’t have found a legal situation that allows me to develop my skills while primarily being a momma.

3) My kids have a great relationship with my husband’s family – less than an hour down the road rather than the ten it used to be.

God knew we’d end up with a family of four kids. He knew our heart would be to homeschool our kids. And He knew that wouldn’t be easy in the D.C. area – at least not then.

How does the beauty of hindsight show you God’s hand in your life? Do you stop to look for it?

Choosing to be Thankful

Do you CHOOSE to be thankful for your abundance in good times and bad?

Throughout the years I have been fortunate enough to receive valuable advice from many sage individuals. Definitely near the top of the list, was the advice to keep a gratitude journal through times of abundance and also times of need. This was especially helpful during my time of grief and although difficult to do many days, I could always find something to be grateful for, even something as simple as food to eat, shelter, or health. These “simple” things that we take for granted are not guaranteed to us and many of us have learned it the hard way. When you are sick, you would do most anything to feel better. Yet, most days, as we walk around healthy, we don’t feel or express gratitude for that. How quickly we forget to thank God.

Unfortunately, it is often through times of trial that we learn to truly appreciate the gifts in life. There are seasons to life and we are wise if we learn how to transition gracefully through them. There are times of poverty, sickness, death, and despair. There are times of abundance, health, and happiness. I have lived through the despair of losing my husband, broken bones, tight finances, loneliness, and sickness. If it weren’t for these times, would the gifts of health, wealth, and relationships taste as sweet? Unfortunately, I think not.

I am grateful today because today I am living in a state of abundance and it tastes so sweet! This past weekend I spent time with five of my closest girlfriends. It was gift to be able to be with them as we live in different states and with demanding families, tight finances, and careers; we often don’t see each other. We rented a beautiful home for the weekend and we spent days laughing, talking, and praying. We ended the trip with a shared breakfast and time in prayer. We prayed for our friends who were unable to be with us due to difficulties. My friends then prayed for God’s blessing on my upcoming marriage and collectively many tears fell, as these were the friends who were with me when I buried my late husband, who was also their friend. Knowing how far away we were in that moment from the day of the funeral, I felt such an abundance of friendship, blessing and wealth. That moment of sweetness will be forever etched in my mind. I carry it close and know it is there for me to access when the times get rough, and they will. Life always seems to swing its pendulum whether we are ready or not.

A certain conversation that I had with a wise and wealthy man years ago has stuck with me. He had grown up poor but through the years he had built a company and made millions along the way. I asked him if he ever imagined he would have so much. He responded by saying he wasn’t surprised, but that he holds very loosely to his riches. He said it was God’s to give and God’s to take away.

The Bible talks about God’s abundant gifts to us and as I reviewed some of the verses having the word “abundance” in them, I was struck by how it often referred to his abundant provision of grace to us. We all love to be given abundantly in terms of riches and favor. However, God’s gift of abundant grace is perhaps the most valuable, is it not?

Every day I will do my best to CHOOSE gratitude for God’s abundant gifts and even if I am in a time of poverty or despair, I will CHOOSE to be grateful for his abundant gift of grace and his gifts of even the “simple” things in my life. This evening, as I head out to have dinner with friends, I will think about this and as I do, our laughter, conversation and shared meal will taste all the sweeter.