Margaret McSweeney's Blog, page 23

Passion in Sports and Worship

Football season is beginning to pick up, which means most of us will have our televisions on at some point on Sunday afternoons. Some people become involved at the game, screaming at the top of their lungs . . . rejoicing when their team scores a touchdown . . . throwing food at the television because of a bad call the referee made.

Imagine if we were to take the passion that football fans have and apply it in our lives and during corporate worship on Sunday mornings. We seem to have no problem praising a sports team, yet the Creator of the universe only warrants the occasional head bob or clap during the music.

Doesn’t God deserve our utmost, our entire being?

It is time for Christ-followers to praise and worship the Savior with every breath in them. Some worship with shouts of joy, others with dancing, still others sitting quietly with their eyes closed. No matter how you worship, do it with all your heart. Don’t worry…you’ll still have energy for that afternoon football game.

Doesn’t God deserve our utmost, our entire being? @MargaretMcSweeney @ReMixHer
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Beautiful Reminders

There are truly few things as beautiful as autumn in Minnesota. The crisp air, the deep blue sky, and the foliage. The trees are spectacularly dressed in red, orange, yellow, and every shade in between. The psalmist writes, “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands” (Psalm 19:1). The earth does as well, especially right now.

The accompanying photo was shot last week as I drove to my friends’ home with dinner, a mum, and a copy of Heaven is for Real for Kids for their little boy. My heart was aching as they had just lost their baby. Questions were bouncing around in my head, including the typical “Why?” These were faithful parents who pledged their lives to God personally and professionally. And yet their baby lived short two days. While my heart ached, the depth of their pain is unimaginable.

As I drove, I was taken first with the deep blue sky. When I turned a corner, this sight was waiting for me. It was if the Lord whispered, “I am HERE, in control. I love this family deeply. The baby is safe in My arms and her family will see her again. I will continue to hold them close, so trust Me.” It was a calming and comforting reminder of God’s sovereignty and compassion as the soft breeze made the leaves come alive and reflect the sunlight. God is here. He has been. He is. He always will be. And that is enough.

He gives and He takes away. He gave my friends their baby for two days when she wasn’t expected to survive at all. He gives us one another to comfort, as we have been comforted. He provides autumn afternoons to proclaim His glory and His love. I thank God for a love so great, a hope so magnificent…and two special days for a beautiful family.

For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth,

visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities;

all things have been created through him and for him. 

He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.

Colossians 1:16-17

God is here. He has been. He always will be. That's enough. @MargaretMcSweeney @BeckyDanielson1
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You Are Beautiful

They called me piglet. When you grow up with four brothers and no sisters, life can be interesting. A few years ago, I was lamenting that to my dad.

Dad said, “Why, they thought of you as that cute little Piglet—you know, Winnie-the-Pooh’s friend.”

I chuckled. It had never occurred to me that I was the petite and endearing Piglet. I had always thought I was fat when I was a kid. I can almost guarantee my brothers were more interested in taunting me than in telling me I was cute. Gotta love those guys!

Now that I’m older and a bit wiser, I realize I wasn’t alone in my perceptions. It’s a common malady for young girls and grown-up girls to think they’re fat or ugly or worthless. In fact, Dove (the soap company) is on a mission to help women and girls recognize and appreciate their natural beauty. “You are more beautiful than you think,” says one of their ads.

In a study, they found that 6 out of 10 girls stop doing what they love—ballet, swimming, gymnastics because they don’t feel good about themselves or how they look. I recently watched one of Dove’s thought-provoking videos.

A former forensic artist for the San Jose police department sketched several women based on their own descriptions. Separated by a curtain, he never saw their faces. He drew amazing likenesses simply by asking them questions about their facial features. He did a second sketch by interviewing another person who had gotten to know this woman earlier in the day. There’s a dramatic difference in those two sketches. How others see you compared to your own perception of yourself is remarkable.

What if we could see ourselves not only through another person’s eyes—but through our Creator’s eyes? Growing up, if I had an inkling that I was “fearfully and wonderfully made” as Psalm 139 tells us, or that true beauty comes from “the inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in God’s sight,” as 1 Peter 3 instructs, then I might have been able to see beyond my imperfections. It’s taken me a lifetime to realize I am beautiful in God’s eyes—and to celebrate being myself.

Bucking a culture which values physical beauty is never easy. I’m committed to encouraging every girl and boy who is part of my life. They have infinite value—and they don’t have to wait until they’re adults to figure that out.

Are You Your Own Worst Beauty Critic? @MargaretMcSweeney @DebKalmbach
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Bless Those Who Curse You

I came across an amazing story on Public Radio the other day about a little boy with more wisdom than most of us.

Terrance, who at the age of 11, was being bullied at school. A slight boy, only about 4′ tall, was the object of ridicule at his school. You can hear in his voice how badly it hurts; his voice is quiet, and when he says “yes” or “no”, it’s barely a whisper.

But what is startling to hear is what Terrance did when the kids ganged up on him. Terrance said that he would go to the bathroom to cry. And pray.

The interviewer asked Terrance whether he has a particular prayer that he says. “Yes,” Terrance whispered.

“What is it?”

“I say,” Terrance answered, “’Lord, bless those who persecute me. Let them not hurt me too badly. Thank You that I am fearfully and wonderfully made’.”

Wait. What? How does an 11-year old boy know how to bless those who curse you?

There’s a happy ending to this story. At 15, Terrance has gained much more confidence. His mother described how changed Terrance is, how children have come up to her and thanked her for Terrance because he’s such an extraordinary child. And here’s what she’s said: “God has taken care of the situation and Terrance will be okay wherever he goes… God made Terrance for a reason.”

What a mom. What a boy!

If you want to listen to the story, it’s archived here: Wounded Warriors and Art

Do you #pray for those who #persecute you? @MargaretMcSweeney @SuzanneWFisher
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I Shall Wear Purple!

“She makes her own bedspreads.

She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.”

~Proverbs 31:22

We are all familiar with the expression, “When I am old, I shall wear purple!” It’s a declaration of independence, of coming of age, of boldly stepping out, of no longer being held back by “What will others think of me or say about me?”

It’s no wonder that purple has earned a place of honor on the color wheel. Purple is associated with royalty. In ancient times, purple was the most precious of dyes. It required 250,000 mollusks to make one ounce. That doesn’t paint a very pretty picture of this precious color, but it does account for its great price back in the day! It was highly valued in Israel; so much so that God specified purple in His design of the tabernacle and temple. Royal robes and garments of the wealthy were purple. Purple set people and places apart from the ordinary.

But the woman of Proverbs 31 did not just wear purple. She also wore linen. Linen is a special fabric. It allows circulation: the perfect choice for a hot day in the middle east! Linen was worn by the wealthy, by kings, queens. It was worn by priests and used in places of worship. Ordinary linen. Fine linen. There was a difference…and this woman wore fine linen!

So, what will we think of her, this woman stepping out in her purple and linen?

Does it make you want to just dismiss her?

Or does it make you want to know her better?

Your answer may reflect more about you than it does about her. Maybe she exposes deep insecurities, jealousy, envy, our own striving for the finer things in life, our own battle with identity, our self-esteem. We’re missing the point. 1 Peter 3:3-4 has something to say about this:

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

It’s hard to imagine that a man would tell us not to take care of our outer appearance! But, the emphasis here is not to follow some sort of dress code or self-denial. Peter is saying that we women need to get our priorities right. We need to spend as much or even more time caring for our inner beauty as we do on our outward beauty, because our true source of beauty is the beauty of our heart.

Ladies, when we make this inner beauty our priority, we overcome our insecurities. We’re no longer striving for the prize in the beauty contest. The battle is over because we know we are loved by God Himself. And we are loving, Loving, LOVING each other as Christ loves us! And, nothing compares to living in the loving support of our sisters in Christ.

THAT is what this woman is about! She is not afraid to wear fine linen and purple because she is a Daughter of the King and she knows it from the inside out. Everything she does flows from that deep place within.

If you have *accepted Jesus Christ into your heart and life, YOU are a daughter of the King too! Don’t wait until you’re old to wear purple! Step out with confidence in the person God has created you to be, set free to love the women He has placed around you!

*Steps to peace with God

Cindy Stiverson talks the importance of #purple. @MargaretMcSweeney
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Grief leaves a hole

To read more about Aftermath and to purchase your copy, visit the bookstore.

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Why I Want the Church to Quit Telling Girls They’re Beautiful

I’m tired of church people telling women that they’re beautiful and that God loves them.

As a woman who grew up in the church, I’ve been hearing that message my whole life. Some of my earliest memories include my dad telling me those very words. Not feeling loved was not something I struggled to understand.

Are there other girls out there who feel like I do?

Allow  me to explain: I’m all for women knowing that they’re loved and beautiful; I just can’t stand the kumbaya that usually follows suit. Yes, I know there are girls who grew up abandoned and abused and who felt unwanted, but for every one of those, there is another one who grew up believing she was and is good enough, brave enough, and smart enough to do the hard work of loving the unloved and showing grace to the undeserving.

At some point, ladies, we need to be able to move beyond feeling love and actually figure out how to do love. It has to move us toward meaningful action, or what’s the point? As American women we enjoy a way of life unavailable to the majority of females around the world.

In this country, parents cherish their daughters just as much as they do their sons. Mothers and fathers rejoice and have parties and celebrate like crazy when a daughter is born. We raise our girls to be strong and courageous, and we teach them that they can be anything they want to be. But often, if they’re part of the church, we tell them that their highest calling is to be a wife and mother, thereby crushing so many of the dreams these women had when they were younger.

What did you want to be when you were a child?

What were your passions and talents?

Who were your role models?

I am a wife and mother, and yet I do not think these things define me. They have shaped me, yes, but God made me ME before he gave my husband permission to call me “Honey.” Before my children made me “Mom,” I was Chantel.

In Carolyn Custis James’ book, Half the Church, she posits the question, “Are we putting little girls and young women on hold until they marry and have children? What if they don’t marry or can’t bear children? Is it possible that at any moment some unexpected tragedy or misstep can downshift our lives from significance to the margins of meaninglessness? Are God’s purposes for women that fragile?”

I don’t think they are.

I think that God created us to serve his purpose, and I think it’s way bigger than just adding people to the world. Even Christian people. When he said, “Be fruitful and multiply,” what if he was talking about more than just our ability to reproduce ourselves physically? I didn’t become a wife until I was 21 years old.  And I lived a quarter of a century before I ever became a mother. I don’t think God intended for whatever I was doing before that time to die when my baby was born. I want to actually be fruitful. I want to do the work God called me to do. May I never be afraid to pick up the phone when God calls me to do his work.

In another dozen years or so, my last child will be off to college. What then?

Please don’t hug me and tell me I’m beautiful.

Tell me to go and do something beautiful instead.

Encourage women and men everywhere to embrace the fullness of themselves.

Right now. Right where they are.

What is that you want to do with your life that you have felt unable or unsupported in doing so far?

#Church, quit telling girls they're beautiful! @MargaretMcSweeney @chanlynnadams
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A Convicting Prayer

Oh LORD God of Heaven,

The great and awesome God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love Him and keep His commandments, let Your ear be attentive and Your eyes open, to hear the prayer of Your servant that I now pray before You day and night for my husband.

Grant him continual patience and forbearance to live with me, a wicked wife. For I have sinned against You; I have acted very corruptly against You by forsaking my duty to help my husband lead our home in righteousness and the fear of You; I have not kept Your commandments, Your statutes, or the rules that You commanded Your servant Moses. Give him boldness and wisdom to rebuke and exhort me when I am unfaithful to Your Word, when I neglect prayer, fail to redeem the time, speak carelessly, walk foolishly, fail to hope in You, seek great things for myself, become anxious about tomorrow.

Do not let him cease praying for me when I am beset with the fear of man, the cares of the world, or the love of money. May he never lose confidence that, in spite of my many iniquities and shortcomings, I am Your servant whom You have redeemed by Your great power and by Your strong hand. O Lord, let Your ear be attentive to the prayer of Your servant, and to the prayers of my husband who delights to fear Your name, and give success to him today, and grant him mercy (Nehemiah 1).

Case, Andrew (2011-02-04). Prayers of an Excellent Wife

Pearl Girl Brittney Melton shares a convicting prayer. @MargaretMcSweeney
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Emptiness

There is nothing worse than feeling empty. Nothing worse that having desire unfulfilled. When we’re empty, we’re unsatisfied. And we are placed at risk because we seek to be filled. (I’ve struggled with that!)

Too often we try to fill ourselves up with the wrong things. In the end, after much pain and heartache, we discover our desire was misplaced. And we still feel empty.

Proverbs 13:12 says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick.”

What do you hope in? If you hope in relationships, you’re often disappointed. If you hope in stuff, you’ll discover “things” don’t bring you the happiness you hoped for.

Do you hope in friends? As a generation, we have never been so in touch with people, yet so empty, too. All the friends we have via the web (even as wonderful as they are) can fill us. People we know and love often don’t see us when we’re in our room, crying into our pillow.

If you’re empty, I have good news. The tomb was empty, too. And because of the emptiness there, your emptiness can be filled. If you turn to Jesus, He will fill you with His love.

“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, not things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39, NKJV

Feeling empty inside? I know Someone desiring to fill the empty space. He loves you so much. In fact, there’s an empty tomb to prove it.

Are you feeling empty inside? @MargaretMcSweeney @TriciaGoyer
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Walk a Mile

Perhaps you, like I, have missed the opportunity to show compassion or love to someone simply because they have special needs and didn’t know and don’t seek a way to connect with them. Perhaps we have no idea how to engage in conversation with them or their caregivers – no idea how to, well, walk a mile in their shoes!

When our son was a few years old, my husband was finally able to express his fear and disappointments regarding the handicaps and challenges that were a part of our every day existence and of concern to us and our sons’ care. It wasn’t easy for him to share his heart, but did so through tears, only to hear the cutting words of the listener, “I thought you were tougher than that.” That was the last time he shared anything about our son with that person, and for that matter, with few others for many years.

If we truly walked a mile in other peoples’ shoes, we’d quickly understand what they have to deal with. We’d become aware of the hot button issues that tick them off, and we’d become sensitive to what makes them tick. We wouldn’t have all the answers.

We wished we could have had people to talk to when our son was small. The people we reached out to were probably not equipped to mentor or help us. For that reason, we desire to mentor couples with young children, to listen to their challenges, to cry with them, and to encourage them. Sometimes listening to their struggles is difficult because we relive in our minds the complexities of our early years; however, the positive outcome is that with the help of the Lord in our lives, we make it; and in turn we can give the help and encouragement to make it too.

Every time we feel as if we want to quit, we remember that we are called to this purpose and that God did not make a mistake. Maybe we can help others who have a similar life situation as we do but who are a few steps behind us in their journey, or perhaps we can simply be one who’ll provide a listening ear if we are not in the same life situation. We just need to be willing. Willing to extend the love and compassion that person needs for the moment.

Ask yourself:

• Am I willing to be a listener to someone who has a challenge different than my own?

• What would it take for me to approach someone with special needs (and/or their caregiver) and ask how I might help or pray for them this day?

• Might I offer to assist in a “caring” capacity at church by watching a child with special needs (thus allowing the parents a time of uninterrupted time to sit in church together?)

• Take a moment to observe what you see. What must their lives be like? Sit quietly and contemplate how you would “do” your life, given what you are observing. Then take a moment to contemplate the things you aren’t seeing (meal times, bath routines, temper tantrums, sleepless night, medical issues, etc.)

Remember that their work is not 9-5 but 24/7. We might just provide them with the love and compassion they need to keep them going…all because we took some time to WALK A MILE IN THEIR SHOES.

Have you missed an opportunity to show love? @MargaretMcSweeney @CindiFerrini
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