Andrew Moore's Blog, page 68

Lesson of the Wizard-Saint

An exclusive interview with Rodelon the Wizard-Saint! Mr. Wizard-Saint, how did you attain that exalted position of both wizard and saint?
"The wizard part was just the same as for anyone. Study, more study, expeditions to strange realms, and more study after that. I wasn't very ambitious. Just the one title was enough for me. After I achieved it though, I had so much free time. I wasn't used to that, I can tell you. I decided to try a bit of gardening.
"I can't do anything by half-measures. I spent more and more of my time and attention on my garden. Yes, soon I put all my soul into it."
That's fascinating! Can we see your garden?
"Certainly. It's known as the Blackdread Mire today. That was when I realized my soul needed as much work as my wizard skills, and here we are."
Wow! Any advice for our readers?
"Few of you will become wizards, but look to your soul even so."
Finis

Rules of Drama

"If a sphinx is presented in the first act, it must activate its death laser by the third." - Antoine Checksum

Name Change Suggestion

"Space Elevator" is both prosaic and misleading. Let's switch over to "Cosmic Ribbon."

Addendum

The super-gigantic apples of the future will of course be called hyper apples.

Science Fiction Terminology Issue

In the future, when we've made ponies even littler, what do we call them? Double ponies? Micro-ponies? Horse minus minus? Xonies?

Addendum

But they're so portable! All right, lyres are back.

The Danger of the Classics

I know the old stories are full of lyres, but nobody likes them. We have to give up on lyres.

The Fifty Floors

Favard paused on the stairs, convinced it was the right move but berating himself for taking it. "You made so many boasts when you went off to challenge the Autumn Tower, didn't you, idiot? Fifty floors of ferocious battles were nothing to you, even though a man able to beat a single one can pick up a captaincy in any country. So strong, so skilled, and you're taking a break after five floors."
The floor challenges justified the tower's reputation. The first was nothing much, just eight expert fighters all at once. The second floor, that one was serious; Tevarin the Hawk had won fights before. Blast Guzo not only won but rarely lost, Baugon the Spiral was enviable in his physique and his record, and then the fifth floor. Diphon Tuesday and his immaculate technique. Favard broke it, but could he really climb higher?
He slapped himself, and the mere fact that he remained conscious proved the weakness of his limbs. Nevertheless, he finished the climb and searched for the next challenge. He saw nobody, smelled nothing, and sensed no fighting spirit at all. He perceived only a sign. A riddle, then? Or some intellectual challenge? He read it.

Now HIring
Expert fighters needed to populate tower. Wait for challengers and take them on. Bonuses for higher floors.
You DO Have To Fight!! You DO NOT Have To Win!!!

After the commute Favard had in reaching the top and going back to the bottom, he understood the labor shortage.
Finis

Addendum

By the way, I'm in favor of technical stagnation so I don't gotta upgrade so much. Back in the day, you needed a new computer every time Origin released a new game.

Ten-Year Anniversary

It's been awhile since the last Crysis game, hasn't it? I never played any of them, but think of the symbolic representation of technical stagnation in videogames.