Andrew Moore's Blog, page 63

There Are Two Audiences And Here's How You Appeal To Them

1) "We have to go to the demon world!"
2) "We have to go to the demon world, which is made up of seven layers. Each layer is divided into four distrcts, and each district is controlled by a lord who has under him one general and his two captains, a chancellor, and five tribunes."

Addendum

I'm not saying Wild Scradzer finishes every fight with a Scradzer Slash, but surely some of them end that way.

The Basis of Preference

I'd be more interested in a lot of books if the main character had a name more like Wild Scradzer. Rand and Locke just don't do it for me.

Addendum

Parakeets? Paralyzekeets.

Consider Pets

Your fantasy world has cats? No. It has magicats.

Quick Language Clarification

Could the language everyone understands without being taught it be . . . love? No. That isn't a language.

The Fairy Cottage

Once there was a lovely little cottage in which nobody lived. A prince took up there for a short time, but he left after finding the secret of the wardrobe. A second prince came later, but he left after he discovered the secret of the attic. A third prince moved after unearthing the secret of the cellar.
"I think we have to give up on this idea of dumping the place on a prince, sir. They have money and not much sense, true, but they aren't stable renters."
"Nonsense," declared Realty Sorcerer Garvaskem. "The secrets you planted there simply were insufficiently fell, my apprentice. Try again."
The cottage is still available.
Finis

Merchandising Opportunity

People need special gloves to read books. Nobody realizes it so far, and it's your job to convince them, sell them the gloves, and pay me for the idea. Get on it.

Addendum

"Five-Circuit Seal"
"Neo Jericho"
"Celestial Motte"
"Integument Unassailable"
"V.F.S."

Juicing Up Your Terminology

You were about to write "barrier," weren't you? Don't try to pretend. Try this instead: "Hell Palisade." This fits science fiction better, of course.