Debra Beck's Blog, page 35
June 17, 2014
Five Tips to Encourage Healthy Eating in Teens
Healthy Eating for Teens Eating right is difficult for […]
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June 15, 2014
How Important Are Fathers To Their Daughters
How important are Dads to their daughters? VERY! Girls […]
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June 10, 2014
Three Tips for Dealing with a Lazy Teenager
Dealing with Teen Laziness Laziness is a part of life f […]
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June 3, 2014
Teen Pregnacy in the Modern World: A Declining yet Still-Serious Problem
Teen Pregnancy These days, it’s great to hear som […]
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May 28, 2014
Tips to Get Your Teen to Stop Lying to You
About Teen Lying Most teens, no matter how goodhearted, […]
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May 19, 2014
The World of Online Porn: Does it Have a Negative Effect on Teens?
Online Porn on Teen Sexuality Last year, Internet provi […]
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May 7, 2014
Tattoos and Body Piercings: Should Teens be Allowed?
Tattoos and Piercings on Teen Body Image In this day an […]
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May 2, 2014
Is Facebook Destroying Your Daughter’s Self-Esteem?
Social Media Effects on Teen Self-Esteem If you have a […]
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April 15, 2014
Talking to Your Teens: How to Counter The Messages Sent by an Oversexualized Celebrity Culture
It’s a shame that teenagers don’t idolize the doctors, scientists and teachers of the world as much as they do the pop celebrities. When I saw Beyonce’s latest video, “Partition,” I felt like I was watching pornography, and I wish I could say I was shocked. It’s clear that sex sells, and most celebrities have no problem selling out. They could use their fame as a platform to promote a much more empowering message, but as independent adults, what they do is their own choice. It’s up to you to provide a better influence for your young children.
Studies Show That Celebrities Have a Strong Influence
The trouble is, it can be very difficult to keep your children from the world of media and entertainment. All of their friends listen to Miley Cyrus, Rhianna and Beyonce, so why shouldn’t they? To them, it seems innocent and normal, but many experts agree that celebrities have a huge influence on young people. A lot of the pop stars who are in their twenties or thirties have a fan base of girls who are younger than 10 years old. Being exposed to such highly provocative content can set children up to become sexual far too early in life. Without the wisdom and maturity that comes with age, entering into the world of sex and dating could result in a life-ruining mistake. Celebrities influence young people in other ways as well. Not only do our kids have to see them dancing around in minimal clothing and singing about getting wasted, but they also witness the many different relationships, marriages and breakups in the entertainment world. This sends a message that relationships are meant to be short lived and superficial. A study by USA Weekend done in 2006 found that nearly half of all teenagers agree that seeing a celebrity smoke or drink makes them more likely to try it themselves. As many as 60 percent say that they would copy their favorite celebrity’s body piercings or tattoos.
What You Can Do as a Parent
Celebrities are going to do whatever they can to make a buck, and aside from not buying their albums or doing anything else to support them financially, the only thing you can do is educate them around sex, and feeling good about themselves through healthy communication. If you see your daughter obsessing about Beyonce, ask her what it is about Beyonce that she likes. If she says it’s her beauty, talk to her about the importance of being smart, driven and well educated. These things that last far beyond the point when looks fade. Understand that this won’t be a one-time conversation. Our daughters are being bombarded by sexual images in the media every day, which means you have to work twice as hard to get the right message across. Talk to your daughter often, and do everything you can to make sure she understands her true worth.
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April 8, 2014
Allowing Teen Partner Sleepovers: Should You or Shouldn’t You?
If your teenager is in his or her first serious relationship, you probably have a lot of mixed emotions. On the one hand, you’re probably happy to see your child in love and feeling great, but on the other, you now have the worry that he or she could start requesting that the boyfriend or girlfriend spend the night.
Depending on your world view, you may or may not consider teenage sleepovers to be appropriate.
In countries like the Netherlands, as many as two thirds of parents allow their teenage kids to have sleepovers with boyfriends or girlfriends. Dutch parents tend to be much more relaxed on these matters than most American parents, but is their practice of encouraging kids to make their own choices with sex really a good one?
Does a Liberal Attitude Toward Sex Actually Promote Responsibility?
Despite the laid-back attitude about sex in the Netherlands, Dutch teens have been shown to have fewer sexual partners and wait longer before having sex. They also have much lower rates of both pregnancy and abortion, most likely due to the fact that birth control is very easy to acquire in this country. Unlike American parents, who tend to be very skeptical about their teenagers’ ability to make smart choices in love, the Dutch believe that their kids are capable of making responsible decisions, and it appears they are right. What Should American Parents Do? The Netherlands is a different country with a different culture, so American parents shouldn’t expect to do things exactly the same. However, there are some lessons that all of us can learn from Dutch parents, one of which is that sex education is highly important. The Dutch educational system provides clear and age-appropriate education when it comes to sex, birth control, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.
Most school systems in the states teach these things as well, but some states are still struggling against the push for abstinence-only sex education, which isn’t realistic. If your child’s school doesn’t provide proper sex education, it’s your job to sit him or her down and talk about the hard stuff on your own. This is especially true if you’re considering allowing your teen to have a sleepover with a boyfriend or girlfriend. The choice is really your own, and there is no right or wrong answer in this situation. However, it’s important to be aware than refusing to fathom the thought of your teen having sex can easily backfire. It’s much better to be realistic about the possibilities and educate your kids instead of creating a situation in which they are forced to sneak around, hide their activities and possibly make uninformed choices that could have lasting consequences.
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Debra Beck's Blog
