Petrina Binney's Blog, page 10
December 15, 2021
Book Review – Horrorshow by Nathan Allen
Book Review – Horrorshow by Nathan Allen
First published, 2021
The story follows Riley Haig, a man going back to his long-despised and thoroughly-avoided hometown, for his sister’s wedding. Stepping back from a job he hates and a boss he abhors, Riley works for an insurance company with a difference: anyone can take out life insurance on anybody at all, in the hopes that, with some accident or dread disease, they’ll receive a massive, ordinarily-unexpected windfall.
At a wedding reception ripe with disasters and multiple deaths, Riley must identify the killer or make his escape, and, with a cast of incompetent police and disbelieving small-town residents, Riley’s only hope may come in the form of Langdon Pryce, pulp horror author and the person writing Riley’s story. Let’s all take a moment to let that sink in.
A darker form of something like the Will Ferrell/Emma Thompson film, Stranger Than Fiction, this novel is filled with witty observations, clever full-circle moments, humour and gore. I didn’t know what to expect from this story, but it gave me everything. There were lots of little insights into the business of writing as well as publishing and film-making, which I enjoyed. I especially loved this speech about creative substance abuse:
“‘Where do I start? There’s Lewis Carroll – he gobbled down ’shrooms like they were breath mints when he wrote Alice In Wonderland. Philip K. Dick did the same with amphetamines for most of his career. Stephen King hoovered up so much coke in the eighties that, to this day, he has no recollection of writing some of his most famous works. And I have it on good authority that [author name redacted on legal advice] was out of her mind on a month-long peyote binge when she wrote that first [series name redacted on legal advice] book. So keep that in mind the next time you read those sparkly vampire and sexy werewolf novels you love so much.’”
53% in, Interlude III, Horrorshow by Nathan Lane
Divine. Even from the copyright notice in the front matter, I was hooked…
“This novel is mostly a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s psychosis. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely regrettable.”
Very strange, I loved it.
December 8, 2021
Book Review – Fat Boy by Joseph Cobb
First published, 2019
“I never knew my grandfather; he died years before my father’s sperm were even stretching out for the big race, and therefore I never had a male role model or father figure in my life… I mean, I did have my father, but he was an absolute bastard of a man. So maybe that’s why I turned out to be such a bad egg, or maybe it was due to my mother booming all 36 chambers of the Wu-Tang Clan as she attempted the housework, while I sat in my highchair inhaling R-rated hip-hop…”
1% in, #1 Tokyo Burning (Goof Troop), Fat Boy by Joseph Cobb
The story follows multiple characters from the crime-filled, seedy underbelly of south Somerset; from the childish hijinks of a pair of young brothers to a young woman taking over her father’s bike shop, and all manner of people in between. These disparate people are, however, linked and the story culminates in an explosive and satisfying finish.
Told in exquisite and clever prose, as well as poetic interludes, it takes a bit of following due to the large cast but it’s well worth a read.
There was a point where, as a woman, I almost lost all hope:
“Truth be told she had her eye on José but was doing that odd thing that most women do when they pretend they’re not interested in you and shrug off your friendly demeanour dismissively and abruptly as if you were a meaningless tool.”
42% in, #8 José Romario Cobos de la Bell (Latino Heat), Stay In Your Lane, Fat Boy by Joseph Cobb.
I mean, spare me. Why we teach boys that if a girl isn’t interested, keep trying, persistence pays, I may never know. If she’s not interested, move on, find someone who is. But then:
“‘But you know, just like a man, he believed my disinterest to be a sure sign of unequivocal lust. Wanker.'”
69% in, #11 Spank (Stick and Move), Castaway, Fat Boy by Joseph Cobb
Ah, there’s nothing like redemption. The relief is real.
An excellent novel.
November 25, 2021
Book Review – Because Of You by Dawn French
Book Review – Because Of You by Dawn French
First published, 2020
On the night the new millennium begins, two women enter a maternity unit in the throes of labour. But only one of the women will go home with a longed-for baby, while both will face devastation and heartbreak that can barely be described.
In response to the question of whether it’s nature or nurture that goes to form the people we become, this story had me in tears before the end of the first chapter. Actual tears. That doesn’t happen very often. I’ve had to set a book aside and just stare at a plain wall for a bit many a time. I’ve welled up and had to have a bit of a word with myself about the word ‘fiction’ more times than I can count. But actual blubbering tears is a rarity and this book got me more than once.
I’ve loved Dawn French for as long as I can remember, although this is the first of her books that I’ve read; a fact that I am soon to remedy. There were a few moments of comedy in the narrative, mostly in the form of insults to the madly-preening, mostly oblivious husband/philanderer, Julius, and it’s always nice to read a bit of Cornish propaganda about the appropriate order of jam and cream on a scone:
“… ‘I’m a loyal man…’
“‘Yes, Isaac, you are, and that’s why I love you.’ Hope affirmed it. She spoke the truth. And there’s nothing like a truth, even a half-truth, to underpin a whole lie, however big. Somehow a lie settles better on a righteous foundation. It’s like the clotted cream on top of the jam on the top of the scone.
“It sits well.
“It’s easier to eat.”
p 142, Isaac’s Second Decision, Because Of You by Dawn French
For the most part, this was a deeply emotional, respectfully-written tale of loss and redemption. And now I’m off in search of the rest of Dawn French’s books. Thankfully, Christmas is coming (hint, hint).
November 18, 2021
Book Review – The Roanoke Girls by Amy Engel
Book Review – The Roanoke Girls by Amy Engel
First published, 2017
The story follows Lane, a teenage girl, later a grown woman, as she deals with her fractured childhood, family secrets and the disappearance of her cousin.
Told by the present adult Lane, and with a healthy load of flashbacks, the subject matter is difficult and hard to explain without giving away the whole story. If we consider that the story is focussed on teenage girls, in rural middle-America, with a lot of family secrets, maybe you can get an idea of the difficult points without my having to spell it out.
The characters are provocative, often they speak without thinking or purposely do what they can to shock or injure with their words. I found this bracing, although often uncomfortable.
The trouble for me was that although there’s a big revelation at the 79% mark, because we’ve been told all about it (just with less graphic imagery) throughout the experiences and flashbacks of the rest of the story, it lacks punch and almost feels like repetition – as it’s first, not so much alluded to as said outright around the 12% point.
As such, this is something we’ve known about for some time. So, is that the point? We’ve read on with this knowledge for an extra 60% of the book, are we somehow complicit? Are we involved in the undoubted crimes, or are we, the readers, hanging about waiting for revenge?
As a thriller, I found it somewhat lacking, but the characters were fascinating and the setting was well-described.
“‘Lane? Lane, is that you?’
“I hold the phone away from my face, squint at it like they do in the movies, before returning it to my ear. ‘Who is this?’ I ask, although I already know, my stomach bottoming out at the sound of his deep voice.
“‘It’s your granddad, Lane. We need you to come home. Back to Roanoke.’
“Hearing the word sends an electric shock up my spine, waking me instantly. I shove myself upright, playing hair off my face. ‘How did you get my number?’
“My granddad sighs. I hear the scrape of a chair. ‘You need to come home, Lane,’ he repeats.
“‘Why?’
“‘Because Allegra is missing.’
“At the sound of her name, Allegra’s words from all those years ago take flight, flittering around my skull and bouncing off the bone… Roanoke girls… gone… dead… dead… gone. ‘I don’t… what happened?’”
6% in, Now, Chapter Two, The Roanoke Girls by Amy Engel
Did I download it because I assumed it would be about the lost colony of Roanoke that I’ve only really heard about from American Horror Story? Of course, I did. What I found instead was dark, compelling, unsettling and fraught with emotion. The fact that the novel had its own spoilers early on made me feel short-changed to begin with but the story is sure to stay with me for a very long time.
November 16, 2021
Book Review – The Sunday Times – A Life In The Day
The Sunday Times – A Life In The Day
First published, 2021
Taken from the long-running interview snapshot, A Life In The Day from the Sunday Times, this collection of 100 interviews of the famous, infamous and venerable takes the reader through the daily routines and pottering-about activities of some of our biggest names.
Including Muhammad Ali, Michael Caine, the Dalai Lama and Kim Kardashian, there are fascinating little humanising insights and some very profound life advice. I especially liked reading about Lee Child’s work ethic, tampered by coffee and cigarettes, and former Dr. Who, Tom Baker, having a nightmare and spending the day drinking.
What surprised me was how many of these people get up ludicrously early – middle-of-the-night early in the case of Dolly Parton – and how many of the great and the good spending a couple of hours in the early morning just mooching around, getting bits and bobs done.
All very ordinary and completely compelling. I knocked a star off because Little Richard’s interview from 1999 stated he was 63 and that when he died in 2020, he was 87. I don’t pretend to be a mathematician but that doesn’t work. Also, the picture (for indeed, there are pictures) of champ jockey, Frankie Dettori is, I’m pretty sure, of his father. In any case, there’s no way it’s him.
November 9, 2021
Book Review – Read Between The Lines by Rachel Lacey
Book Review – Read Between The Lines by Rachel Lacey
Expected publication date, 1st December 2021 (I know, get me)
Bookshop owner, Rosie’s favourite author is the elusive, single-named, lesbian romance writer, Brie. Having struck up an online friendship, without benefit of photos or personal information, Rosie finds herself increasingly infatuated with Brie. But, at almost thirty years old, she has other, more pressing matters to deal with. First and foremost, the fact that she and manager, Lia, are being evicted from their storefront. The shop holds a special place in Rosie’s heart as she grew up within its walls, and developed her love of reading before inheriting the business from her mother.
So, when corporate property developer in beautiful shoes, Jane, steps through the doors so begins a rollercoaster of deep emotion, hormones and hurt feelings.
But will Rosie save her shop? Will Lia have to come back to Blighty? Is there any hope that an online hatbox could turn into real-life romance? And will Jane ever be able to follow her dreams without disappointing her family?
A really sweet story. Read Between The Lines is very well-told, the relationships were striking and believable; an excellent example of lesbian fiction: cute, romantic and no quasi-scientific talk for anatomical lady-business.
Although not a challenging read – there were moments when I thought it was too sugary to take seriously, cynic that I am – when I finished reading, I found, quite suddenly, that I missed the characters.
Just lovely.
November 2, 2021
Book Review – Dracula by Bram Stoker
Dracula by Bram Stoker
First published, 1897
Well, I’m a bit of a horror nut, so I’ve seen countless adaptations of Dracula over the years and was pretty familiar with the story before I started reading. That said, I’m going to be forty next year and I’ve made it my mission (note: not New Year’s Resolution because (a) it’s November, and (b) I don’t believe in them) to read a whole load of classics over the next few years so as to ensure if anyone makes an oblique reference or an obscure quote before I’m fifty, I’ll recognise the sucker.
Hence, Dracula. Written in the form of notes, journals and diaries, the story follows Jonathan Harker – an English estate agent, finalising the sale of a house to a reclusive Transylvanian Count. Up in the Carpathian Mountains, young Harker finds himself ensconced and then trapped with the sharp-toothed, gaunt and lanky Count and his harem of undead lovelies, hoping and praying to return to his beloved Mina, unadulterated and in one piece.
But as fate and real estate would have it, the Count is bound for an England unaccustomed to his bloody, somewhat carnal desires (I’ll remind readers that this was published in 1897 and the world has altered rather), and only Harker, his intended, the other men who wanted to marry her, and a Dutch doctor, Van Helsing, have any hope of stopping the monster.
A rip-roaring tale, highly gothic and suspenseful despite the multitudinous film and TV adaptations on the box at this time of year. I did struggle a fair bit with the phonetic-writing in parts of the book. Some of the minor characters speak with various broad accents which are written as said. Although an aid to local flavour, this, coupled with Dr. Van Helsing’s rather broken English left me occasionally bewildered.
That said, it’s a classic and everyone should read it.
Writing Tip #32: How Fast Can You Write?
So, in order to be profitable, you surely need to knock out as many books as possible in the shortest time imaginable, right? So how do you learn to write quickly, quickly enough to make money, without succumbing to a dip in quality? Is it even possible, without writing a self-publishing handbook?
Book Review – Writing A Book A Week: How To Profit With Self-Publishing by Alex Foster
First published, 2013
“Writing, in general, can be a passion, but digging deeper and writing about what you are passionate about is magical.”
77% in, Plenty of Ideas, Writing A Book A Week by Alex Foster
So, is it a gimmick, or can it be done? As with so many things, it depends on what you mean by ‘book’.
There’s good advice on the types of software you might need to write a book at all, where to keep notes, the perils of certain writing packages when it comes to formatting, and the obvious bonuses of cloud-storage – all important things to know.
But the question is this: Can you write a book in a week? Taking a day for research, as recommended in this guide, and then writing the thing in the following six days… doesn’t really tell the whole story. If you’re planning on writing a standard novel (40,000-75,000 words total), you’re looking at writing approximately 10,000 words a day and, ultimately, not editing out very much, if anything at all. And an unedited book is often disappointing – due to too much fluff and extraneous detail, or misspellings. And heaven help the author who messes about with apostrophes.
If you’re looking at something closer to a short story or novelette (7,500-17,000 words total), it probably is possible to write a book in a week. But it’s worth bearing in mind that there will be extra time required for editing, beta-reading and proofreading. These are steps you really can’t afford to avoid.
However, whether you can, or indeed should, write a book a week, the author is correct when he says it’s about commitment and making yourself accountable (more on that later). Ultimately, the writer needs to work both sides of the street: as the creator and the manager. It might feel like it’s enough that you have a talent for making something beautiful with words, but you still need the chutzpah and the skills to sell it.
My advice is this: if the stress of finding five hours a day just for writing is choking up your creativity, look at the longer term. If you can find an hour, it might not seem like much, but in an hour of writing, you’ll have more on the page today than you did yesterday, so count it as a win.
I like that, at the very end, the author throws in that he hasn’t actually written a book a week for a whole year, for the sake of his health. For my money, quality takes time, and accountability is not the same as picking yourself apart. Be kind to yourself. The book will take as long as it takes.
October 31, 2021
Book Review – The Black Dahlia by James Ellroy
Book Review – The Black Dahlia by James Ellmore
First published, 1987
“The stench got to me, so I walked over and opened the window. Looking out, I saw a group of uniformed cops and men in civilian clothes standing on the sidewalk on Norton, about halfway down the block on 29th Street. All of them were staring at something in the weeds of a vacant lot; two black-and-whites and an unmarked cruiser were marked at the curb. I said, ‘Lee, come here.’
“Lee stuck his head out the window and squinted. ‘I think I see Millard and Sears. They were supposed to be catching squeals today, so maybe—’
“I ran out of the pad, down the steps and around the corner to Norton, Lee at my heels. Seeing a coroner’s wagon and a photo car screech to a halt, I sprinted. Harry Sears was knocking back a drink in full view of a half dozen officers; I glimpsed horror in his eyes. The photo men had moved into the lot and were fanning out, pointing their cameras at the ground. I elbowed my way past a pair of patrolmen and saw what it was all about.”
20% in, Chapter Seven, The Black Dahlia by James Ellroy
Based on the real-life grisly torture-murder of Elizabeth Short, the Black Dahlia, whose body was discovered, mutilated and dissected in the undergrowth of a mostly-deserted industrial estate in Los Angeles in 1947.
The story follows ex-boxers, now police officers, Bucky Bleichert and Lee Blanchard, and the woman they both love, Kay Lake. As Bucky and Lee look into the murder of the Black Dahlia, their investigation leads Bucky to a grand mansion, a series of lesbian bars, and right across the country to Boston. Meanwhile Lee, keen to exact justice on a newly-released bank robber, heads to Mexico and a strange fortune. But will the team find the killer? Will Betty Short ever get justice? And when will Bucky stop seeing her face when he looks at his wife?
An awesome story, visceral and bloody, I had to look away from the page from time to time because the writing is thorough and unflinching. The characters were really well captured and frankly leapt off the page, and the author’s voice feels authentic to 1940s police-speak.
There were a fair few instances of extraneous apostrophes (for example: “DA’s” meaning multiple DAs, “straight A’s” – no apostrophe needed, “B&E’s” for “B&Es”, etc.) and a strange absence of the second E from the word ‘heroes’. Having not read Ellroy before, I have no idea if this is a stylistic choice of his (which I could respect) or something missed in editing (which I wouldn’t).
That said, it’s a powerful, shocking and atmospheric read and I’d give it a big old thumbs up.
Side note: the 2006 Brian De Palma film with Mia Kirshner, Josh Hartnett and my favourite, Fiona Shaw, is pretty dang faithful to the book. Look out for kd lang’s cameo as the tuxed-up lounge singer at the nightclub.
kd lang in The Black Dahlia (2006)
October 30, 2021
Book Review – The Day That Never Comes (The Dublin Trilogy Deluxe Part One, Book Four) by Caimh McDonnell
The Day That Never Comes (The Dublin Trilogy Deluxe Part One, Book Four) by Caimh McDonnell
When an incompetent, unlicensed private investigator loses the guy he’s trailing with alarming regularity, and the bodies start piling up, it surely won’t be long before the possible philanderer becomes a suspected murderer…
But with Paul Mulchrone learning how to be a PI from books, and his new business partners, Brigit Conroy (no longer speaking to him), Bunny McGarry (missing, possibly permanently) and Maggie (ex-police dog, example of the now debunked dominance theory, and quaffer of pints of Guinness) of little to no use, how will Paul solve the problems of the woman in red? And what does it have to do with the destruction of the Celtic Tiger?
An absolute rollercoaster, this. More emotionally charged than the previous books but every bit as funny and engaging. I particularly loved the character of Detective Superintendent Burns: a woman at the high point of her career, suddenly lumbered with a massive, migraine-inducing case while the Boys’ Club tries to push her aside. From the introduction of her character, where Donnacha Wilson has just been sick in front of her, I knew I was going to like her best.
“’Superintendent, sir, er… ma’am, have you got a second?’
“’The news of the murder has just hit the media, so if this is about my shoes, then you’ve already apologised.’
“Wilson glanced down, and noticed the footwear in question sitting in the bin.
“’No it’s not. I mean… although, can I just say again… if you’d allow me to replace them…’
“‘Yes, you can buy me shoes, and then the other detectives can take turns taking me to dinner and getting me sexy lingerie. Forget it. Now, I’ve got a high profile corpse to deal with so unless there’s anything else, or you’d like to pee in my handbag…’”
68% in, Chapter Twelve, The Day That Never Comes (The Dublin Trilogy Deluxe Part One, Book Four) by Caimh McDonnell
I highlighted so many turns of phrase in this collection, but this one struck a big old chord with me:
“When you rise fast, those you passed will take particular delight in the fall.”
85% in, Chapter Thirty-Four, The Day That Never Comes (The Dublin Trilogy Deluxe Part One, Book Four) by Caimh McDonnell.
Words to live by.
I’ll say this: I wanted to take a star off for all there junk food the dog was fed through the book – multiple packets of pork scratchings from the pub, a full cooked breakfast and a few pints of Guinness, but I reminded myself that it’s fiction and funny stuff at that. You should read this for entertainment, not for dog-feeding tips.
For the second novel, follow this link: https://amzn.to/3b9N71o
Or, to get right into the craziness and get the whole first part of the eight part ‘trilogy’, head over this way: https://amzn.to/3mcu4tK
