Roger K. Allen's Blog, page 21

Creating a Safe Place

I love and recommend a little book by Shakti Gawain entitled, Creative Visualization.  She is someone I read years ago as I started my journey of personal development. In particular, she teaches some powerful techniques for learning to use visualization for healing and health. Here is a passage about creating your own safe place or inner sanctuary where you can go again and again to feel safe, find your power, and create your future.

“One of the first things you can do when you start using c...

How to Find Greater Fulfillment and Meaning

Last week I talked about the difference between success and fulfillment. I define success as achieving a predetermined outcome (usually external, observable, and measurable). I think of fulfillment as internal and subjective, a sense that life is rich, full, and meaningful.

Both matter. Yet, success can feel hallow and empty if our lives are not balanced, filled with love, grounded in the present, and a deeper sense of personal purpose. In fact, chasing success (wealth, beautiful home, build...

Fulfillment versus Success–Which is More Important?

Fulfillment versus success–which is more important? I have thought about and studied these two concepts for many years. Although interrelated, they are distinct. Each is important and understanding the difference can help us find balance in the journey of life.

So I want to share with you the following passage from my book, The Hero’s Choice: Leading from the Inside Out, which makes the distinction between these two ideas:

Hal laid back on the rock, pulled his backpack under his head, and ga...

Fulfillment versus Success

Hal laid back on the rock, pulled his backpack under his head, and gazed at the blue sky. “Sounds like my high-school buddy, Duane. He was the most popular guy in my class. Voted Most Likely to Succeed. The whole thing. He went to a prestigious college, then Harvard Law School. Boy, did I envy the guy. It seemed like he got whatever he set his sights on. He even stole my high-school sweetheart.” Hal laughed. “He graduated at the top of his class and was hired by a red-hot law firm and shot s...

How to Stop Procrastinating

Most of us procrastinate, be it putting off doing the dishes, cleaning the house, paying bills, getting a report done at work, having a sensitive conversation, getting started on that book I’ve always wanted to write, going to the gym, and so on.

Procrastination is not complex. It comes down to this—we trade doing what is hard or unpleasant for something that is easier or more pleasant in the present moment. In other words, we get a BIG immediate reward out of our procrastination but at a lo...

Stop Procrastinating

Most of us procrastinate, be it putting off doing the dishes, cleaning the house, paying bills, getting a report done at work, having a sensitive conversation, getting started on that book I’ve always wanted to write, going to the gym, and so on.

Procrastination is not complex. It comes down to this—we trade doing what is hard or unpleasant for something that is easier or more pleasant in the present moment. In other words, we get a BIG immediate reward out of our procrastination but at a lo...

Turning a Disruptive Student into an Ally

 

As a young man I taught a class of twenty 16-and 17-year-old students. I thoroughly enjoyed the students and we got along great. They were lively and active and had a great sense of humor, making the class a lot of fun. However, one student by the name of Mark did not know when to be serious. The self-proclaimed “Steve Martin” of the group, he was always having fun and making jokes, sometimes to the disruption of the group. As a good-looking and popular kid, he got away with a lot.

One day...

Which Wolf are You Feeding?

Last week I wrote about how to overcome negative self-talk. It reminds me of the fable in which an old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life.

“A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil–he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence...

How to Overcome Negative Self-Talk

Talking to yourself has a bad connotation. Have you ever watched someone walking down the street muttering to him/herself? We associate it with isolation and low self-esteem. But even if we don’t mutter aloud, the truth is that each one of us talks to ourselves much of the time. And not only do these inner monologues determine our moods and behavior, they literally become self-fulfilling prophecies and eventually define our reality.

As expressed by Elinor MacDonald, “The things that you keep...

Confronting Poor Performance

Do you manage people? If so then I want to let you know that I just launched a new, state-of-the-art video training course entitled: Performance Management: Confronting Poor Performing Employees.

Many business owners, leaders, managers, and supervisors do a poor job of confronting problem behavior. They ignore or side-step sensitive issues hoping they’ll go away (they don’t) or they come across in an angry and blaming way which creates a negative, adversarial work environment. Learning to ta...