L.T. Marshall's Blog, page 36

Ten things you did not know about me.

I have a phobia called Thalassophobia – which can include fear of being in large bodies of water, fear of the vast emptiness of the sea, of sea waves, and fear of distance from land. I am in short – afraid of water.
I worked in a mental health center to assist adult day patients when I was 16 years old. I left after being physically abused several times daily by patients and was unable to cope with the constant care demands placed on me.
I trained as a Beautician, nail tech, masseuse, relaxation therapist and make up artist when I was in my early 20’s and ran a mobile business for years.
I owned an exotic animal charity which was legally registered and we operated a learning center from a theme park in Ayr. We ran for 6 years taking in hundreds of exotics and giving talks 7 days a week until we almost went bankrupt with the crippling costs. We resigned and handed over all animals we had left to volunteers before returning to normal jobs and family life.
My family history is more dramatic and unbelievable than a plot from Eastenders. It also all happened in one street where some of my family still live.
I have 14 siblings – half, step and real. I only have relationships with half of them.
I wrote my first book aged 6 and won a school competition. It was about the friendship between a dog and  cat who lived next door to one another.
I suffer from severe social anxiety and periods of my life I have been unable to leave my own house for months on end. I am now self managed and force myself to big events several times a year to combat this. I get sick with nerves before each trip.
My birth surname is Ukrainian. (not one I use). My grandfather was a German army POW who came to the UK when he was a young teen and could not go back for fear of being shot.
I am allergic to stings. Wasps and Bee’s have different effects. I have been stung 5 times by wasps and once by a bee in my lifetime. Each required medical attention quickly.

This was a bizarre get to know me post. I hope you learned something about me today and I hope you take the chance to do the same on your own blog x
Leanne xx

UK versus USA spelling when it comes to reviews!!

Disclaimer – I am sure this blog has genuine flaws LOL.

This is a quick blog , merely because it is something I come across all the time and it shouldn’t bother me by now but it does. It grates. I commonly see the ‘spelling’ issue on reviews across the board and by now I would have hoped that reviewers realised the difference between genuine typos – and intended spelling use.

This blog for example – UK English. I am British.

You see a long time ago I never had an editor and the books were put out after seeing very few proof readers, so when I saw error notes on reviews I knew it was genuine. I have dyslexia, among other difficulties and I generally call myself ‘grammar blind’ in mockery because it is one area I have always struggled. Since then I have been working with a professional editor, and a formatter to release the paperbacks as we go through my back list of books. Each one polished to perfection by someone from the industry who has an amazing reputation and is freelance to big publishers.

Therefore, I know. The first two paperbacks and E books are now as near flawless as I can ever hope for (even big publishers allow the odd typo if you ever find any) yet I still keep seeing complaints on the spelling and grammar in these books.

That is when it dawned on me.

The complaints were coming from certain countries.

Now you may not be aware of this, especially if you come from anywhere that writes in the English language and lives outside of USA and Canada, but we have different spelling and grammar rules on the same language in these countries and NEITHER are wrong.

UK, seems to be in sync with most other countries in how we spell many things, common spellings, use of grammar etc and rules in how things are written on paper, while USA and Canada have their own rules around it all and this may often seem like a book is riddled with flaws.

My books are set in the language of the main protagonist. Therefore books 1-6 are USA edited. Meaning they contain USA spelling and grammar, even though I am a British writer. This is deliberate and my editor is very efficient at editing both.

Book 7 however, she’s an English protagonist and is therefore set in UK English. Just Rose is Scottish, set in UK English but also with some Scot’s English as it is based in Scotland (that book was edited by my ex publishing company and still needs to be redone. They left many errors.)

You may not think that matters, but the countless reviews who feel it necessary to point out flaws in editing and grammar give a flawed view of the book to other readers (don’t start me on reviews that focus on this – it’s another rant lol). My editor and I are of the unanimous feeling that reviewers should never touch on this area unless it’s shockingly bad, or they are trained editors themselves. You simply do not know how many editors they have paid to see the books and can only go on trust that it has been done well. Writers are usually not the best with grammar and spelling, a lot of us have underlying learning issues or are on the spectrum and writers become blind to the flaws when trying to edit themselves. More common than you know in writers. Editors are not always as brilliant as they claim to be and in the self published industry, it can be very hit or miss. It has no bearing on the story itself, which is what you are reviewing.

Reviewers should focus on the plot, the story and whether it was enjoyable. After all most of the reviews I have seen, slating spelling and grammar, are riddled with genuine mistakes. It’s not actually something professional reviewers do, as they understand editing issues usually lie at the feet of the many small publishing companies, editors or proof readers and have no bearing on the writers talent to write.

Reviewers – review the story. Nothing else.

I picked an editor based on her recommendations and seeing her work among peers I respected and admired. She is amazing.

I have linked some examples of the huge difference in the two sets of spelling and grammar below, but here’s an image for a quick example.

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Helpful websites – reviewers may want to brush up and take note if they review books set that are often in either language. These are good to know and quite often helps you determine if a book has real flaws, or just set in something you are not used to seeing.

https://www.spreeder.com/important-american-and-british-spelling-differences-you-should-know-2/

http://www.tysto.com/uk-us-spelling-list.html

 

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An open letter….

Disclaimer – Take this in anyway you wish, it may or may not be applied to real persons. It may or may not be applied to persons in relation to me. It may just be creative writing and all completely made up. Only those who know me, will know for sure.

I have been through the mill as a mother these past months with two kids in great need of special attention and care and we are getting through. I have been very reflective of parenthood as a whole and I finally feel this is a topic I can brooch, without feeling anymore on the subject.

 

Dear Sperm donor.

You were there at my conception, possibly my birth. I have not bothered asking my mother about that detail as it’s so very unimportant to me.

You see you were ‘there’ for the first few years of my life, but not really in a very active parental role. You worked away, you had your evening pursuits, selfish ones that never included us, and my memories are profoundly mother and sibling orientated. Hell, I had more time with the neighbours than you. So much so, I can remember more vividly the times in my elderly friends back garden than any one happy time with you.

What I do remember is your indifference, sometimes your cruelty. Your violent temper and nasty tongue. Your methods of exacting punishments. That even when you were around, as a girl, I was ignored for the most part as though you had no clue what to do. Well… for the most part.

I remember the other things, when you were making your presence very known in our little quaking house and the reverberations of those memories that shook my foundations for many years. My anger issues and years of healing are a nod to your parenting expertise.

Well done for such a great job. NOT

There was a whole mess of things – separation, custody battles, accusations, child protection, new marriages and such …. and then you were just gone.

Sort of.

See the  drama, rumours, nasty messages through family and such… they continued for a long time after, even though my mum tried to hide it all from us. I have ears and eyes you see.  I just wished you would crawl back under your stone. And the showing up to things you had no right to come to in the past years of my adulthood. Inviting yourself to things you could gain something from. Not because of us, no way. Hell would have to freeze over first before your actual children became a priority.

It’s not that you died, although I may actually care more now if that had been the case and could excuse all your sins because you had. It’s just. I feel we lost our usefulness as a weapon to hurt my mother, when she got us back. When the children were the ones who told people we didn’t want to be with you.

I feel that you had your focus on new wives, new kids and you severed a loose end. Four of them. We only had a use when we chased you like little puppy dogs and adored you from afar. When we could do something for you.

Well not me… I always had more sense.

You tell people you tried… I was old enough to remember – The whole one time you took us for access. Then you never came back. Not that we were missing much. You dumped us outside to play in the street I grew up in and we were told we couldn’t come in the house as your new baby was sleeping. The neighbour kept us until dinner and then you took us back home. I only remember seeing you in the two car journeys that day and you never spoke to us the whole time. You never even made sure we ate food through the day.

What you don’t know is that every week we got ready, and sat outside and waited, well my baby brother lasted a lot longer than I did. Bless his little sad soul. A full six Saturdays in a row. I know because I counted the weeks. I told my diary what a tosser you were even though I knew my mum would give me a row for using such language.

My eldest two brothers didn’t even want to see you by then, and called him dumb for keeping on waiting. I sat beside him and waited too, for him though, not for me.

He was three years younger, and in the days of darkness within your walls I had become his protector and mother figure. So I sat with him when he cried and asked ‘Will he be here soon?’ And even at Nine years old I knew, but I couldn’t say it to him. I would say ‘Maybe if we play for a while, he might just be late.’

I coaxed him from that step by noon most weeks, but only to find he would not stray away from where he could see it.

He cannot even remember that now. He has forgotten all of those things. Thankfully, he has no memories of being in your house.

You never came, you never called, you offered no excuses.

Even bastard fathers are missed by broken little kids.

In all these years I have been told over and over how you blame my mother for your absence. How she made it hard. How she poisoned our minds against you and I want to say this loud and clear.

I was mature in the mind at the age of five, normal for children who live in dysfunctional families – I listened, I watched and absorbed everything. I witnessed and received.

I lived the life you like to deny.

I. Forgot. NOTHING!

Just because I was the silent one, doesn’t mean I was unconscious for nine years.

Not once did my mother ever say a word against you, even though she had plenty she could have said, when it came to us. In fact, even now, 30 odd years on, she still tries to encourage us to have some sort of relationship with you. She is old school and believes a sperm donor should have some connection to their offspring, despite how awful he truly is, and I continually teach her that is not true.

You were never the victim in that situation. EVER.

I get no benefit what so ever of having a connection to you. You would only mar my children’s lives and leave them feeling a fraction of what you made us feel. That’s a fraction too much in my eyes.

She told us nothing. Not one thing. She never needed to. She had the sense to know we could remember it all. Something you do not seem to comprehend in anyway. You act as though we were asleep all those years. We all have our own memories, and the court documents on the divorce she kept all these years, as her only voice in this situation, because she never wanted to jade us.

Even though she had no reason to protect you.

Yet four children on their own, made the choice by themselves! What does that tell you?  – You WERE and ARE a waste of our time.

No one knows what goes on behind closed doors and the half side of a story you tell people is pathetic.

You still sing the victim card about how we were ripped from you , we moved house, you could not find us, we cut you off, she stands in your way – woe, woe, woe,  is me.

You know, like how you were the victim the night you took a kitchen knife to my step dad, and threw me over a fence into a rose bush full of thorns, after attacking my heavily pregnant mother in front of us!! She had to go to hospital that night.

You never change.

Still.

Here’s the facts.

We lived in that same house for 3 whole years in which you did not come for your court approved access. You never paid one payment of Child maintenance for any of us, I know because a lawyer asked me If I wanted to pursue back payments of all those years after you got your pay off. I don’t want anything from you.

We did not change phone numbers in the house you never called. My mother never intervened in anyway, yet dutifully got us ready when we asked with no words of ‘you know he wont come’. My brother held on at six years old for six whole weeks, before he realised toy cars held more interest and playing in muddy puddles than sitting on a doorstep watching an empty road.

We all got over it. On the surface anyway.

We lived with you when she was fighting for us. YEARS of our lives. Yet you stopped giving a crap the second we were not your problem. Stop lying about what you did.

I never bonded to you, even as a child. My mother and brothers were my world and you did so many bad things to the people I loved in front of me. I had to rely on you for survival for three years while she was gone, and that is as far as it went. It’s probably why I have been the least affected by your absence and I can write this now; because you stir no feelings in me anymore.

I gave up caring over 25 years ago. I have no emotional response to a person who doesn’t deserve it.

I watch the effects on my brothers though, and the small scars, from neglect, abuse, from having a father walk away after being a part of their existence for many years; and for that I will never forgive you. Before my brother died he told me how he wasted years of his life trying to build a bridge and how he regretted ever trying. He was done with you. Wanted no more from a man who is incapable of being what he wanted. Then he died and you use it as a reason to play broken father of the century. I removed you from OUR memorial group because your posts made me sick to my stomach. You have no clue what conversation went on between us leading to his death. NO CLUE.

I removed you from my Facebook after being coaxed to accept you, because all you did within the first twelve hours was attack my sister and cause drama. Threatened her with violence. What a shock!

YOU DID. Not her!!!

I forgive nothing.

Not for the bruises, the cruel words or the other memories ingrained in all of us.

You were a shitty person.

A worse father.

I got free.

I thank the stars for the day I got to leave your hell hole with my baby brother by the hand. My older brothers ran away from you long before. What does that say?

You may not be the same person for your new family that you were for us, so they say, and for that I am happy for them. Truly. I harbor no ill will to them at all. I am grateful for your new wife, for trying to make the best of a situation when she came into it. I am grateful to the step siblings who tried to also navigate an awful situation although they too have been led to believe we are the enemy. We are not. We were all innocent children caught up in adult affairs that touched all of us.

One thing you should know though.

When you showed up for financial gain over my brothers death, I was livid. I’m over it. Just know it will never happen in terms of me – it’s in my will you see.

Or at the funerals where you blanked me and offered my brothers around me a drink and acted like I wasn’t there.

No matter what way I go or what happens – only my actual Dad (the step father who raised me all my life. The man who clothed us, fed us, hugged us, took us to many parks and happy memories. Who stepped up where you failed. The man who no matter what, travels hundreds of miles to help us in need at the drop of a hat. The man you poison people against as ruining your life – Don’t make me laugh.) He gets the title and the pay out should I ever leave this world. You cannot fake a relationship that was never there when it comes to me. You won’t get a penny.

You see – the fiercly protective, family orientated trait in all my Carrero men – was taught to me by my step dad.

My real family – the ones who bothered to stay with us through all the years, no matter the distance, the situations or the fall outs. The ones who time and again will overcome all hurdles to be a part of our lives. THOSE are who you should take note of and aspire to be.

Yeah I know, you became a good dad to your new family and your new baby. So I keep being told. That does not excuse anything when it comes to us.

A real parent let’s NOTHING stand in their way. And when they fail, the do not blame others, but only themselves.

So sperm donor, I sometimes refer to you as the Bio one too. Take note before you think of your ‘every few years’ attempt at looking me up. It’s pointless. Too little far too late.

I never needed you anyway. I never will.

My kids have a Granddad. Actually they have two really great ones who show them everyday what real men do for children they love.

They don’t even know you exist.

I am better off without you.

Yours sincerely

The girl you forgot about.

 

 

 

The Carrero Magazine Is Coming!!

We have something brewing in the works for my fan base that I hope you are going to love!!!

An exciting quarterly online magazine that will be free to all. You can join the mailing list to make sure you never miss the new issues and we are aiming to have the first one out in October, to coincide with another very awesome event – Carrero Week!! (more info on that in the near future.)

Join My Mailing list 

We have been brainstorming on what to give you that would just add value to the series as a whole in between books, and I can give you a sneak peek of what we have coming.

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You will be able to access the 14 page magazine on an online site and it is shareable for anyone who has friends who might want it. We will keep you updated on release, and to give you an idea of contents – here is the intro page sneak peak to wet your appetite.

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The magazines will then live in an archive, so you can catch up with all editions, save them to your device and even print them off. ( We will possibly move to print copies on demand) That’s four Magazines a year, of exclusive content for the ever loyal Carrero Fans !!!  Insight into Carreroland!

#ClubCarrero

To send in Fan Letters, Agony Aunt letters, Ask The Author, or other suggestions for the magazine – you can use our online form , which has an ANON option .

CLICK HERE FOR FORM 
Or you can email us at Enquiries@ltmarshall.blog

Coffee Break Companion S.L.Grigg

To celebrate the six month anniversary of the release of Coffee Break Companion S.L.Grigg is hosting a blog tour, and you can pick up a copy of Coffee Break Companion for just 99p for the week of 28th August to 3rd September 2018.

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Blurb: Grab that cup of coffee (or tea if you prefer), maybe add a splash of something stronger, settle down and enjoy your break with this gripping collection of flash fiction and poetry that will send shivers down your spine. With an added bonus of a longer story at the end that will fill your lunch break. What are you waiting for? Dive in!

Author Bio: This is the first published book by S.L. Grigg having previously written a popular blog on mental health, and having articles published by Mind, the mental health charity, and NHS England. Working for NHS England from a home in Bromsgrove, England, S.L Grigg lives with a partner and two adult children. S.L Grigg has studied everything from Science and Law, to Journalism and Pilates but writing has always been the greatest passion in S.L.Grigg’s life.

Sharon Grigg, who writes under the pen name S.L Grigg, made it her new year’s resolution to publish her book ‘Coffee Break Companion’ during 2018.

“For me publishing was never about, money or fame. I just wanted to be able to hold a copy of my book and say, ‘I wrote this’ and now I can.”

Links: http://www.facebook.com/SLGRIGG76 http://www.slgrigg76.wordpress.com

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Wherever you are in the #World this link will take you to your local #Amazon site so you can pick up a copy of my #firstbook #selfpub #newauthor #indieauthors #free on #Kindleunlimited – https://t.co/3AYfZ79zLl

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The Carrero Contract – Free for 5 days!!!

Why sharing a PDF is not the same as sharing a paperback…..

We have this topic come up often within the book clubs I am in, and just today on a post a fellow reader asked the question… ‘What is the difference?’

I feel that it’s not unreasonable to assume the two things are the same and that one is no more harm than the other. So I will explain  it to you in much the same way I explained it to her. In simple terms. What sharing an illegal PDF means to an author, over sharing a paperback.

Passing on a paperback – When you pass a friend a book you have purchased, this is not the same as passing on a digital copy. In fact some authors encourage this. You have paid for the physical copy, and to pass something which belongs to you on is fine. You are able to regulate who borrows your book and it will be returned to you. Most people who share paperbacks, do so with very few people, and the amount of times it’s shared is usually nothing in the large scheme of things.

You do not own the intellectual content though, so copying from this book and making a duplicate would be where you would be infringing on copyright. At any one time, only one of your friends or family can borrow this book, and as most people take a fair bit of time to read a  book – it makes little impact on sales.

The ability to pass on your physical copy is made legal by ‘the right of first sale‘ a passing in court made when publishers tried to ban sharing of physical books. It was deemed that unless a ‘copy’ was made, then this does not physically break copyright.

Libraries are allowed to lend books under these rules. They pay for the originals and can therefore lend the physical book out, while the author still receives an original royalty. The lending is also reported on, so has an impact on rankings in terms of best selling books. Some libraries have arrangements with publishing houses and authors to lend E books, but this is always with permission and not in any breach to copyright.

Passing on a PDF – Now when you forward a PDF to someone on your email list, you are not merely passing on a  physical copy. You duplicate this item, it’s the only way to pass on digital media, and therefore, you are in fact committing piracy. This item becomes a shareable file, which then your friends and family can share on and duplicate for themselves; meaning – you cannot regulate how many copies are formed from the one file you shared. That one share may be passed on to several people per email address and end up with hundreds of shares within days. Imagine if every book out there was passed around this way. No one would buy originals and authors would cease to write. Every file share impacts the living an author makes , as authors are paid on a commission basis from sales. There is no way to keep track of the number of illegal files being shared daily. Anyone who shares or receives a PDF this way is committing a crime.

E book ownership – when you purchase an E book, you do not actually own the copy. What you pay for is a license to read the content. Licenses vary and some authors allow lending through a regulated means, such as Amazon lending. It’s available on some books for 14 days after purchase. The fact is the actual intellectual property of the eBook never physically belongs to you. Just the permission to read it. And amazon take measures to make sure this function is not abused.

More info – https://www.theguardian.com/money/2012/sep/03/do-you-own-your-digital-content

So to recap ….

Paperback – Physical item – to copy you would have to photocopy.
PDF – Every time you share you create a new copy automatically.
Paperback – Can only be used by one person at one time.
PDF – Can be duplicated indefinitely and shared multiple times without regulation.

Sharing an illegal PDF is a breach of the author or publishers Intellectual property rights. Not only does it affect sales (people are always going to jump for free when they can – it’s human nature) it does not support the book industry in anyway and is a huge problem. Revenue lost to piracy has a knock on effect where sales are concerned, and it is always the author who suffers. Commission based contracts are the norm in publishing and Indie authors are fully royalty based. You are taking money from the very people whose work you enjoy. Not all authors have a lot of income and even some bigger names have to have a day job to support themselves.

We do not have the backing of big studios and a set wage like movie stars and films. We remain royalty based, no matter how well we do.

Another fact – when you purchase a paperback, you are paying for the original item. So the author receives the royalty and therefore that is a ‘paid’ book (like libraries). When you receive and share a PDF you can guarantee that not even the original was bought, it was illegally pirated or passed on by someone who had access to an early copy without permission. This sadly happens sometimes and book reviewers caught doing so become permanently blacklisted.

Here’s another tale of piracy from Maggie Stiefvater- https://www.theguardian.com/books/2017/nov/06/pirated-ebooks-threaten-future-of-serial-novels-warn-authors-maggie-stiefvater

She wrote a series which became a mega hit and began selling well. Sadly her sales became so poor on the release of a new book, she truly thought her series was beginning to fail. That was until it was found on hundreds of pirate sites. She took action and  it was reported that in the following weeks her sales sky rocketed once more as ‘free book’ takers had to then purchase, instead of steal. This should highlight that YES  – piracy does impact your author.

If you have any respect then you would not want the person who writes for your enjoyment to suffer. You want to enable the creation of more books and to be fair, most people are willing to spend more money on other items…. greeting cards, take out coffee, confectioneries, cosmetics – Luxury items… these items are around the same price, or less, than most Ebook’s, so there is never any excuse.

Want to know more? –  PDF about Intellectual Property rights

 

Want to support us in asking Facebook to clamp down of the illegal sharing of books on its platform ? Click here – 

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Human strength…

I know this is a really weird topic to blog about, but this week in my life it is a topic which has been paramount. I have not been having the best time of it this past few months. Family, health issues, major stress and stuff going on in my personal life that have added up to an exhausting daily routine. I have reached breaking point many times. So no one knows more than me about the human spirit and it’s ability to be strong. My determination to always carry on and try to hold it all together.

I didn’t have the best start in life but I have always been a tough person who never stays down for long, so it really got me thinking when a few groups I am in started discussing the topic of strong women – weirdly, I have never seen the same topic in regards to men, but that would be an entirely different post. The basis of these discussions was very negative and really, as someone with strong feelings on human emotion… I had to have my say in a healthy way. Rather than a social media argument over whether Brenda was strong for staying with a bipolar husband for ten years, I felt a more rounded opinion was necessary to express.

To add to that, a couple of reviews on my earlier Carrero books, hinted that Emma from Books 1-3 of Carrero was weak, and I have had same said of Rose on the Just Rose book. I also noted on reviews from various readers on Goodreads, the topic of ‘strength’ seems to be common in what they look for in certain characters – usually the women. And the perception of what makes a person strong, varies greatly. It always seems to be used in a negative light.

Through my life I have known women labelled ‘weak’ by other women and it got me to thinking about it in a more generalised way. Why people are so judgmental on something that is as subjective as the very books we write.

According to google – the definition of being strong is as follows….

‘In some cases, being strong is simply about being able to persevere through extreme adversity. It can be something horrific like the tragic loss of a loved one, or something difficult and trying like getting laid off. It can also be emotional trauma, like recovering from a divorce or a tough break up.’

And being emotionally strong ….

‘To be emotionally strong is firstly, to know and recognize your emotions when you feel them and secondly, to not let it get the better of you. … And as time passes by, as you gain experience of thinking practically in an emotionally overwhelming situation, you keep growing as an emotionally strong/ stable person.’

Then we have mentally strong …

‘Most successful people have one trait in common: they are strong–minded. Someone with a strong mind is mentally tough and resolute about their ideals, but they aren’t too stubborn to grow and adapt to new situations, either.’

Now to me, being strong is not as easy as writing a list or setting out examples of strength. It’s different for every situation and soul and I have pondered the harsh critic on the lady Emma, and her girl Rose a few times. About exactly what it is about those characters that was identified as weak. I myself did not write them that way, both are fiercely independent and self sufficient in their own ways and yet despite whatever reasoning within their plot, they were brave enough to give fully to another human. They had the strength to trust, change their lives and earn themselves a Happy Ever After.

What I discovered about peoples opinion was more of a ‘they don’t act how I would act’ mentality or ‘she didn’t do it alone’. This weird idea that women are only strong if they never let a man act as support, or if they never show vulnerability.

It seems there is some unwritten rule among the more ‘single minded’ of today that unless you are a singleton with a successful career, mortgage,  perfect life and bitchy attitude towards everyone – you are merely not strong! That you cannot value traditions such as happy marriage, the role of housewife or mother, or anything another judgy person deems to be ‘society brainwashing’ and yet have value as a person who is mentally, emotionally capable.  That if you stay with someone who needs patience and support… you are a weak woman.

Ridiculous!!!!

I would say self absorbed and selfish sounds more apt for the women accusing compassion and love, of weakness, but I’m not one to judge LOL.

You can be a stay at home mum, who loves to bake and please her husband, happily married with no major ambition outside of seeing your kids thrive … and still be strong. In fact you can be completely content and fulfilled too. Only a real woman could find that sense of happiness and commit to it wholeheartedly.

 

What do I deem strong ?

 

Learning to trust another human after living through horrendous heartbreak.

Getting up and drying your eyes after falling apart and taking another step.

Forgiving those who wronged you because you don’t want to carry that burden, while still cutting them out of your life.

Putting yourself out there, even when sick with fear.

Following your dreams no matter what.

Putting others first in times when you yourself need someone.

Admitting when you need help and asking for it.

Overcoming all that should hold you down and never letting it.

Allowing your heart to feel, no matter how many times it’s been broken.

Building others up even when your own self esteem is gone.

Putting yourself first. Saving yourself.

The list is endless……

 

According to Psychology today , these are the basic traits of strength.

Emotionally strong people….

are less discouraged by setbacks and disappointments.
are more adaptable to change.
are able to recognize and express their needs.
focus on getting around a hurdle rather than on the hurdle itself.
can learn from mistakes and criticism.
tend to see the larger perspective in a challenging situation.
are able to recover more quickly from emotional wounds such as failure or rejection.’

 

We have our own levels and ladders to navigate. No mention of you know – leaving men , going it alone, or never crying your eyes out.

That child who cried and overcame abuse, to then fall in love within a healthy relationship and become a loving mother – she wasn’t saved… she was strong.

That bruised woman who overcame her insecurity formed by bullies, who then came to succeed at a dream no one believed in – that is strong.

That mother whose sick child drains her to exhaustion every day and yet gets up and with tenderness continues to care indefinitely – that is strong.

That little voice who speaks out for others, even when hit with backlash and ridicule – that is strong.

What I do know for certain is one thing. Deciding if someone else is strong or weak, is not your business. Until you walk their path, feel what they feel, know how many times they have bounced back since birth… then keep your opinions to yourself. We all have our own battles and demons, we all fight in our own ways. Who gave you the right to determine someones strength based on the very little you may know about them?

You know what is not strong ? Tearing down another human who does not meet your ideal and shaming them for it. Making judgement on half-assed facts and no comprehension that there is no ‘one way’ to do things in life. Thinking your decisions are superior to the person whose life it is you are judging. Feeling like you have a right to publicly air and label people because it’s not to your standard.

Ironically – That’s the weakest thing I have ever seen!

 

 

 

 

Book Piracy Petition.

If you remember, I wrote a blog post on Book piracy not that long ago, that went into detail on why I dislike it so much.

In light of that week, a fellow writer, Wendy Clarke, owner of the wonderful Fiction Cafe Book Club on Facebook, and I, decided to start a petition following unsuccessful reports of various pirate book groups.

Facebook rejected almost a dozen separate author reports for one specific group, simply because we cannot report copyright if it is not ‘OUR’ intellectual property. They also claimed these groups did not breach the community guidelines known as Facebook law!

Despite these groups having multiple illegal files from well known authors and shamelessly distributing them.

 

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Being that we are very stubborn women, we decided to start a movement to have Facebook revise this policy and crack down on illegal book sharing on it’s platform.

#stopbookpiracy

We ask that they not only take responsibility for the content being passed around on their platform, but they allow third party reports for copyright theft , in case the owner of the property is not able to find their own content. That means groups full of pirated books could be reported by anyone, not just specific authors for their own books only, and Facebook would have to act.

If you want to report a Facebook group for piracy to be added to the list we are compiling, you can send a link with the details to my own team……..

We are working with other authors to crack down on this draining practice.

Enquiries@ltmarshall.blog

 

You can support us by clicking here – Sign the petition!!!

 

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Confessions of an author on her newest book…..

As the reviews for book 7 start to roll in and the feedback from fans and readers come back at me, I can heave a massive sigh of relief and admit something to you all.

Book 7 had me terrified!

Nerves are normal with every new book release, I mean it is only human. We put a little piece of ourselves in each book and it’s like then putting yourself out there to nakedly stand in public. It can be both the worst moments and the best, and I have really never got used to it. We all know, no matter what – you will get negative reviews. No matter how good your books are; in fact we prepare for them among the good. Books are subjective and not all readers will instantly like what we write. So it’s perfectly sane to be a little apprehensive when you do put a book out. I too have my fair share of ‘didn’t like’s’ on Goodreads and amazon. I see them as a right of passage to being a real writer…. I mean look at any big best seller and you will find they have hundreds of 1 star reviews.

Now this book however…those feelings, much more magnified and intense, well they started with the construction of the very first sentence. In the very tiny, little, unimportant, first few words I ever put on the page. That shiver and tingle of apprehension and morbid fear, running up my spine and I knew this book was going to be different from the rest.

I knew I was taking Carrero on a darker path, breaking the mould of what makes the Carrero men something you adore… I was pretty much tainting the name itself in a way. And that for me, with a loyal following , was the most stressful moment of my life. I had so many self doubts. It was a move I was not sure would pay off and I could ruin my fan base in one fell swoop.

The fear and stress followed me through the writing process, editing and beta reads. Despite the glowing feedback and reassurances from my team and their undying patience as I unraveled a little every day. Then when they pre-order release loomed close… I physically fell to pieces.

I spent a full day pacing, wringing my hands, obsessively checking my kindle and driving my team insane with constant PM’s and meltdowns. Diva at her best because Diva was having an emotional break and could see this book being an end to Carrero…..Yeah I can be a tad dramatic. Sophie did not just come from nowhere, you know!

My ‘dudes’ – they were great, and distracted me by posting countdown timers at me and reminders my book may kill me – thanks guys!!! Such support and understanding!

I was beyond terrified of the book going down like a lead weight and yet….this one is soaring more than the rest.

Even after release, as reviews began to trickle in, that feeling of severe anxiety stayed. I know now looking back that I had nothing to be afraid of, but I think once we become complacent that our books will do well, we stop giving our best in what we write.If that happens then we need to stop writing because we are no longer giving our readers the books they deserve. I am not a half-assed player… if I cannot give my ALL, then I wont bother doing it anymore.

I strive to always do better…my competition is not out there in the indie world. It’s sat right here at my desk everyday. I am my own bar to be measured against and that makes each book even more challenging as I set the goal posts higher with every release.

Book 7 is not tanking – I can relax…. Yes I am genuinely surprised. I am also crazily proud and cannot thank you all enough for the beautiful support.

I just felt that maybe if you are a writer out there and you are suffering from crippling self doubt about your new endeavor – you should know.

You.Are.Not.Alone!

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