Jane Jago's Blog, page 4
October 17, 2025
Granny’s Pearls of Wisdom – Odd Socks
Pearls of wisdom from an octogenarian who’s seen it all…
Why do I have a drawerful of odd socks? I don’t buy odd socks. I don’t make a habit of taking off one sock and leaving it somewhere random. I don’t make a hole in one sock of every pair.
So where do the single socks come from?
Some of them aren’t even from pairs I have ever owned.
Does the washing machine eat socks?
Is there a sock fairy stealing them?
I have no bloody idea.
But what I do know is that there’s only one...
October 16, 2025
Darkling Drabble 7
A darkling drabble offers a shiver of horror in a hundred words…
She picked up the little ghost in the hospital mortuary. It was barely more than a toddler and had been so severely brutalised in life that it couldn’t find any way forward.
When she beckoned, it came, with loneliness furrowing its insubstantial brow.
“There’s room for a small one,” she smiled and it hopped on board quickly as if afraid she might change her mind.
When they touched, the little creature’s loneliness broug...
October 15, 2025
Word of the Day – Egocentric
In an effort to educate the nominally literate and inform those with sufficient humility to understand their own lack of comprehension, Esme offers the correct definition of misunderstood words…
Egocentric (adjective – pronunciation note: ego centre ic) Describes a person who seeks to place themselves at the centre of any situation. Example: Being egocentric, Chloe Chatterton managed to get herself indicted for a murder that happened when she was in a completely different country.(no...October 14, 2025
Dai and Julia – The Interrogation
In a modern-day Britain where the Roman Empire never left, Dai and Julia solve murder mysteries, whilst still having to manage family, friendship and domestic crises…
The Vigiles House occupied the back corner of the Basilica Viriconia so it was not too long a waddle for Julia to get there. She and Edbert were shown into Bryn’s office as he was just setting up a monitor screen on one wall. He looked over as the door opened and addressed the Vigiles officer escorting them in. “Fetch the Domina...
October 13, 2025
How To Be Old – A Beginner’s Guide! (15)
Advice on growing old disgracefully from an elderly delinquent with many years of expertise in the art – plus free optional snark…
I am old, and I don’t give a shit
About gravity’s work on my bits
I’m not some humble dame
Who can be ‘body shamed’
By a halfwit with silicone tits
October 12, 2025
Strange Place Between
After the equinox, before Halloween
October falls in that strange place between
And has become a time that means much to me
After the equinox, before Halloween.
The last month of long days before the clocks change
The last month for sunshine afore colder ways
The high month of autumn and her golden sheen
After the equinox, before Halloween.
But for me October holds some special glow
For of all the people I have come to know
October is when the birthdays seem to be
Of those friends I most cherish, w...
October 11, 2025
Aeva’s Challenge – III
A tale of angels, demons and dragons…
After he spoke, the silence in the chamber was such that it scraped against the nerve endings. Aeva broke that silence, although she could hear the strain in her own voice she said that which needed saying.“The female to whom my father gifted my wings.” In an instant she found herself surrounded by a ring of steel and corded muscle.“Abomination.”Voice after voice around the Chamber of Guardians took up the refrain and The Guardians hissed as Lucifer e...October 10, 2025
Granny’s Pearls of Wisdom – Excessive Gentility
Pearls of wisdom from an octogenarian who’s seen it all…
Ladies of a certain age/type get right on my norks. You know the ones I mean, those whose sneezes sound like a tiny cricket chirping, and who would die of embarrassment if they farted alone in an empty room.
I know I scare the snot out of these mimsy little ladies and doing so is a source of constant delight.
If you don’t believe what fun it can be, sneak up behind a maiden lady in a queue and announce that your arse itches.
Cr...
October 9, 2025
Darkling Drabble 6
A darkling drabble offers a shiver of horror in a hundred words…
He sometimes wondered if they knew what their fate was, but then again he couldn’t believe them intelligent enough to understand the nuances. And anyway he gave them a good life, didn’t he? They had food, warm beds and plenty of outdoor space to run around in.
His life mate rather thought the strange noises they made were some sort of rudimentary speech, but as a female she was prone to odd notions and improbable fancies.
...October 8, 2025
Word of the Day – Bratwurst
In an effort to educate the nominally literate and inform those with sufficient humility to understand their own lack of comprehension, Esme offers the correct definition of misunderstood words…
Bratwurst(noun – pronunciation note: brat first) Child-centric lifestyle wherein the offspring are consulted on every aspect of life. Example: Simon and Niobe’s bratwurst extended to family decisions about where to shop and who slept in which bed on any night. (noun – pronunciation note: boug...
