Rae Roy's Blog, page 39

Symphonic Saturday – Jung on Music

[image error]Rather than spending a large amount of time writing my own piece, I thought I’d share this one I stumbled onto about Carl Jung and Margaret Tilly.

It’s also Cinco de Mayo today, so whatever you do, remember to avoid drinking and driving. It may also be Revenge of the Fifth if you celebrated Star Wars Day yesterday. If you just continued partying, you’ll get your hangover this evening or tomorrow.

And it’s the season opener of the newly formed Ottawa Valley Roller Derby tonight at 5:30 PM at Brewer Arena! I’m excited about this as I no longer have to choose which games to go see

Thoughtful Thursday – Jung on Gratitude

[image error]Carl Jung said a few things about gratitude when he was alive that really speak to me. One of the more poignant in my life right now is, “Be grateful for your difficulties and challenges, for they hold blessings. In fact… Man needs difficulties; they are necessary for health personal growth, individuation and self-actualisation.”

It has been feeling difficult lately and it has partly been because I’ve been a bit disorganized. That’s not usually me. A few months back, I decided to separate my home task list from my writing and work task list. I thought it was a fantastic idea to be MORE organized. It turns out, I prefer to see everything in one list. It’s easier for me to deal with it all in one convenient place. Not that it was inconvenient as I use KanbanFlow and it’s easy enough to switch between lists, but I can prioritize it all better in one rather than flipping between them.

Anyway, hopefully this period of challenge is leading to something amazing. Right now, I feel rather like I’m in the same place I was before I went back to school only I am more equipped to write the pieces I want to write. But I’m not any further ahead in learning French. I have Fridays blocked off partly for self-study in that area, so hopefully I’ll improve enough, so I won’t be completely useless for a job that needs it.

Jung also said, “If our religion is based on salvation, our chief emotions will be fear and trembling. If our religion is based on wonder, our chief emotion will be gratitude.”

What if we replaced the word religion with something else? Let’s put life there instead. If our life is based on salvation, if we wait for others to save us, it will be full of fear. If we look at the world in wonder, it will be full of gratitude. I like that much better.

And it can be hard to be grateful sometimes. When you’re unemployed and you’re behind on your chores and your neck is acting up so much you want to refer to it as several other parts of the human anatomy, it’s easy to forget about the things you do have.

I have a really good emotional support system. People who care about me. And that means more to me than money ever will.

I’ll leave you with this other thing he said, “The word ‘happiness’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced and contrasted and compared to sadness. In comparing how an experience could have been worse we develop gratitude and happiness, while if we compare it how it could have been better we develop bitterness and sadness.”

R~

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Theatrical Tuesday – The Persona

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Sorry, I’m late on this post because my neck was super sore yesterday and I mostly got movies watched because of it.

Anyway, Jung totally relates to theatre. Carl Jung came up with four archetypes. One of these is The Persona.

Basically, the persona is the masks we all wear around different people.

Now, some people act exactly the same around everyone they know, but most don’t.

I know people that can’t sneeze around people they don’t know well. I know tons of women that have shy bladders in public restrooms. I know I used to pretend I didn’t like horror as much as I do.

I totally act different with my five year old buddy than I do with someone on a date than I do around my martial arts pals than I do with my brothers, etc.

That’s normal and mostly reasonable. This picture describes this a little better.

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Actually, this one is even better.

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So we’re all actors most of the days of our lives.

It’s part of the reason coming home from work is such a relief. You can be unapologetically you.

Ideally, you want to get to that place with some of your social groups because they form your support network. I’m almost totally me around my dojo buds and the people that have known me since I was a child. For some, it’s been awhile since they last saw me really inebriated because our parties changed when they had babies, but that’s life. But I know if I really needed help, they’d be there.

Now, I don’t think it’s incredibly beneficial to hide large chunks of who you are from people you want to be closer to. If you have romantic feelings for someone and you spend a bunch of time pretending to be someone you aren’t because you think they’d be more impressed rather than letting them get to know the real you, well, that’s probably going to blow up eventually. More to the point, why would you want to? Why would you want them to think you are what you think is cooler than you are? I mean, they might actually think the real you is cooler than that person you want to pretend to be.

But sometimes we need to act, like when the boss expects the moon and you can only deliver a picture of the moon because you’re not in possession of some moon capturing device and even if you were, that would probably destroy the Earth if you actually tried to give it to them. But you tell them, sure thing and deliver as close as possible. Actually, I usually tell them I can’t destroy the world for you, but I’ll get as close as possible.

Wait, that got weird. See why I don’t usually let all of myself out to everyone? I can be quite ridiculous.

Anyway, there are some other Jungian archetypes and they’re all quite fascinating. You can read more about them here. I’ve talked about a couple in this post.

R~

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Make-It Monday – What’s Next?

[image error]Today is the start of the first week after school has ended.

For myself, I was already living a freelance writer lifestyle before school, so it’s partly a return to that only actually getting paid for it. For many of my classmates though, it might be overwhelming thinking about where to start.

I’ve started by applying to jobs and filing my taxes. I plan on having someone else do my taxes next year as it is getting too complicated for me. Next, I will be developing my schedule. We had an assignment on this in school and it’s mostly putting that into my Google calendar where it will pop up and remind me what I should be doing and when I should do it.

Matthew McConaughey has an inspirational video that talks about eliminating all the things that aren’t you as a starting place.

We did so much this year. Some of the workshops were about things I thought I’d want to do, but in learning more about them I realized they weren’t for me. Lifting is a problem for me due to an old neck injury, so I avoid positions that require a lot of it. At first glance this seems like a negative thing for my future, but it has helped me narrow down the list of options. Script Supervision might be a place for me eventually because I used to manage projects, but I don’t want to start in an area that has so much responsibility when there’s still so much for me to learn about working in film. One can really mess up a film in this position because they’re like the funnel everything must go through. Also, after nearly a decade as a project manager, I’d prefer something slightly more relaxed for a bit.

I know some are drawn to jobs because of the pay scale. I’m not. I don’t need a lot of money to be happy. If my expenses are paid, I can afford some martial arts seminars, and go on the odd vacation, I’m happy. It turns out that I don’t need a lot of money for that. I’ve also learned that it’s the people I care about and the memories we make together that matter most to me. Money enables us to do more together, but so many fun things are free or almost free. Last year, some of my most enjoyable times involved Pokémon Go and seeing a little boy get super excited about each catch.

This week’s theme is Jung. There are quite a few things Carl Jung said about success. One I particularly like is:

“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” — Carl Jung

Like the video above says, figure out who you are and who you want to be, then you’ll have a clue of what the next steps are for you. And it’s not a race. Some people arrive sooner and others later, neither determines who will be more successful. Success is what you decide it is. You’ll make mistakes along the way. Everyone does.

What’s next for me?

Working a flexible part-time transcription gig. It’s low paying, but better than nothing.
Meeting with someone who may give me a job.
Editing my urban fantasy romance, The Page & The Magician.
Entering my registered screenplay in contests.
Sending my screenplay’s one-pager to a contact we made in Toronto.
Feedback on my screenplay by a friend who loves the genre, so I can improve it.
Extending my 10-minute play to a one-act length.
Playing video games. Oh, how I’ve missed these.
Painting my condo.
Applying to more jobs.
Dating.
Learning to skateboard.
Starting another screenplay.
Reactivating my EI.

There is a lot of work ahead for me and I’m excited about it. I’m so excited that I had to sit down and tell myself to relax. I’m eager to get all these projects out into the world and it was stressing me out because there is so much to do.

I took a little breather after the hectic pace of the last couple of months and organized my thoughts. I realized I shouldn’t rush anything and just calmly work through the list.

R~

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Symphonic Saturday – Cold Music

[image error]So I got distracted by friends and Poutine Fest yesterday. Sorry! In my defense, there was a gluten free truck!

There is an organ in Moscow. It’s debatable how musical it is, but this video is pretty cool.

But this is the one I was actually looking for. Here’s another.

There is an entire festival in Norway on ice music.

The tones that ice instruments make are different than cold instruments. They’re also different than almost anything else. To me, they sound almost otherworldly.

But I can’t imagine that it is comfortable to play most of them with the need for the instrument to stay cold and your hands needing to be warm.

They’re beautiful though and I could see there being a certain level of honour involved in playing them.

R~

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Frisky Friday – Cold Sex

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Image created using Bitmoji

It’s been about a month since I felt like writing this type of post and it’s about time I got back to it.

Everyone knows women need time to warm up, but there’s a perception that men are always ready for sex. While many are easier to get excited, quite a few men enjoy and need foreplay too. This isn’t often thought about.

Many aren’t really a fan of the hand unless you use a little lubrication. And it’s not about going for that zone right away either.

Kiss him.

Everywhere.

Run your fingers down his spine.

Get creative.

Be careful though. Some are particular about where you let your fingers wander to and you might want to talk about some things first.

Above all, have fun with each other

Thankful Thursday – Cold Gratitude

[image error]Sometimes one can become hyper-focused on something bad. The thing begins to consume from within until one has difficulty doing the most basic things such as eating and sleeping.

It’s at times like that when I find it helpful to freeze.

Then I switch my thinking to what is wonderful in my life. Close friends who support me and my writing. A delightful little boy who makes me remember my purpose of helping others. Clients who love my work. New friends. Acquaintances who might be becoming more. Realizing I may not be as far from becoming bilingual as I thought. New hobbies.

My life is full of so much potentially awesome things right now.

It can be hard to realize one is spiraling downward though. Hard to get to that point where one knows they need to put the brakes on. Hard to stop the negative momentum from carrying one further down.

The only way I’ve found that works is to breathe. When everything around me seems to be exploding, I stop and take a breath. I talk to loved ones. I take a walk and contemplate where I’m at and where I want to be. I think about whether or not the path I’m on is leading me in a different direction than my goals.

Being thankful for what I have helps me get through the bad times and find my way back.

Today is the last day of my graduate studies and I’m thankful for all the people I’ve met this year. Even the bad ones taught me lessons that will surely benefit me in some way in the future if only to make me properly cautious of everything I do and who I do it with.

It’s been quite the ride. At the start, I was scared I wouldn’t make any friends because I’m a little older than most in the program and a lot older than others. The bus also terrified me as I had nothing but terrible experiences with it before. And I was so scared I wouldn’t be able to keep up on the workload.

But I got used to the bus. I made friends. And I not only handed nearly everything in on time or early, but I received a letter from the dean telling me I had made the Honour’s list.

I’ve even come to embrace that I’m part of the millennial generation, which is something I wasn’t particularly grateful for before. Being born in 1981 makes me an odd millennial as my life began more like a Gen Xer’s rather than always having the Internet and computers around. Yesterday, I actually had a conversation about remembering when CDs became a thing and how awesome it was when anti-skip technology came out after.

All this to say that a year that started off cold and full of fear has ended so differently than it began. It wasn’t easy. That whole strike thing was an extra bit of stress that no one needed, but I made it and I’m ready to tackle whatever comes next.

My plan for the summer includes getting a job and refreshing my French because I’m getting closer to being able to at least speak it. I feel like that will open a lot of doors for me and I’m excited to continue working on my writing. And I definitely want to make time for loved ones too because they make all the challenges worth pushing through.

R~

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Warrior Wednesday – Cold War

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Image created using Bitmoji

As today’s post needs to include both martial arts and cold, I wondered about martial arts that may have been used during the cold war. Well, an Internet search got me to the website of Impact Martial Arts who have a tournament called Cold War. That wasn’t at all what I was seeking, but it could have been much worse.

That’s how research goes sometimes.

Of course, it doesn’t help me that I don’t know enough about the actual Cold War in order to figure out where to search for martial arts that may have been in use during it. Now, technically one could say all fighting done by a military is martial, but I think you know I’m trying to find out about arts such as karate, taekwondo, tai chi, BJJ, and more.

It also doesn’t help that I’m very much a person who lives in the present day.

Eventually, I found a bit on an art called Systema. Systema sounds more like the original way people learned to fight. What do I mean by that? Today, it’s really common to learn an art that focuses on a specific skill. For example, Jiu-Jitsu is a lot of grappling and ground work whereas Iaido has a large focus on drawing a sword and cutting immediately. As my Sensei has told me, originally there was no need for so many arts because warriors studied all of them and just used whatever technique fit whichever situation they found themselves in. If they were fighting in close proximity, they’d probably do karate or jiu-jitsu style moves. If further away, a sword or staff was likely to be useful.

Systema combines grappling, firearms, knives, and hand-to-hand combat with pressure points. It seems to be more comprehensive than many other arts today.

As you might have guessed given the connection to The Cold War, Systema hails from Russia.

Here’s a little video showing some Systema moves.

R~

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Theatrical Tuesday – Cold Reading

[image error]In theatre, it’s quite common to have to read something aloud that one has never laid eyes on before. This is called Cold Reading. The most common times it happens is the first time one gets a script or at an audition.

It’s can be a bit uncomfortable. Often, I’ve felt as if I’m being scrutinized on how well I step into a role I’ve never seen before. I might not know anything about the character.

This happened a lot during my 9:00AM Monday class that is now complete. We would be given a play to read and I often didn’t know anything about it or its characters. I’d get barely a moment to skim and try to get a sense of what the character was about.

Professional actors probably have to do this regularly. It’s almost like presenting something you haven’t researched. In my limited experience, it’s common to do some parts of the read through well and some completely wrong. A good director will help one get the tone right.

I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I didn’t get too uncomfortable about it, but that may have been because the stakes weren’t overly high. It wasn’t as if I was trying to impress anyone or ensure my bills were going to be paid. No, I was just trying to get the marks I needed for the course and to stave off boredom while others read. It also let me recapture some of my old acting days.

I’m not sure if I will act in the future or not. It’s possible. My main focus is writing and I don’t see that changing in the immediate future. Stranger things have happened though.

Speaking of my writing, I’ve made many of the changes I’ve been wanting to on this site. Many items have been moved under a new portfolio section. I will be filling that out more in the coming months.

School is optional today and I’m thinking about staying home to work on my condo now that my homework is done. I can also use some time to look over notes for my Thursday class that has a quiz. I want to work on my accent wall today and do some painting on the weekend. Plus, it’s too gorgeous outside, I need groceries, and my skateboard is available for pickup after 1:00 PM.

R~

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Make-It Monday – Cold Success

[image error]Well, my week of holding back ended with a seminar that was coincidentally about a martial art that has holding back as an integral point. On Saturday, I did an entire afternoon of Yagyu Shinkage Ryu, which is the study of the life-giving sword. It’s goal is to leave your opponent with a warning blow rather than killing them. It was such a fascinating change from the usual and fit with where I am in my life and career.

Sorry, I got too busy to post with all the homework I’ve had.  It’s the last week of school and after today, all I’ll have left is one assignment and a couple of quizzes. We still have a couple of lessons, but mostly they’re about what we should do to be successful as new screenwriters.

This week’s theme is cold. That’s what came out of the bag randomly.

In terms of success, I think it’s common to feel like one is getting colder as they draw nearer to a major breakthrough. At least, I keep reading that successful people have found that they made it after they thought they should give up. And I feel that. It wears on one to keep fighting to get some basic level of income going, especially in a town that wants everyone to be bilingual. I’m working on that, but it isn’t something that changes overnight. Many of my skills mean nothing to a lot of places simply because I don’t speak French well enough.

Right now, there’s a ton of potential in my life, but nothing yet that will pay my mortgage. It’s rather scary, but it is what it is. I’ve been applying for jobs and networking. Hopefully something will happen soon.

Goals wise, I have to fix up my website and do some quizzes then all my school work is done. After that, I’d like a little trip to see my family since I haven’t seen them since Christmas. Oh, I guess I better get my summer tires on too. After a breather that includes some video gaming and condo painting, it’ll be back at the writing and more job searching until I get enough going on to pay my bills while I search for a producer for my feature film and fix up one of my plays. One movie, one play, and one novel are what I want to focus on for personal writing projects. Doing somewhere around eight things at once was a little bit much during the school year.

I guess cold hard cash is really what I’m aiming for at this time.

Anyway, that’s my general plan. I have it laid out more specifically than that in my career plan that I gave my teacher.

Oh, I plan to date too