Rae Roy's Blog, page 41

Symphonic Saturday – Super Music

[image error]So I’ve realized I really can’t sing well in the slightest. But I’m not worried about it. As a petite human with food allergies, I’m kind of used to working within my limitations. I can still learn to play an instrument and either have someone else sing a song I write or I could do spoken word to music, maybe even rap.

I’m not super gifted in anything. Everything I’ve achieved lately is part of about a decade worth of work learning things like how to write better. In the case of my play, it’s also partly taking an old interest and redirecting it into the writing side of things instead of the acting/technical side, but all of those roles are helpful in writing.

As the last post on superheros this week, I wanted to list some superhero related songs and albums that I’m aware of:

Songs

Kryptonite – 3 Doors Down

Something Just Like This – The Chainsmokers & Coldplay

Superheroes – The Script

Superhero (feat. Chris Linton) – Unknown Brain

Fake Geek Guy – Kari Maaren (https://karimaaren.bandcamp.com/album/everybody-hates-elves)

Albums

Feminum – Kool Krys (https://koolkrys.bandcamp.com/)

Videos

Epic Rap Battles of History:

– Wonder Woman vs Stevie Wonder

– Deadpool vs Boba Fett

– Goku vs Superman

– Jim Henson vs Stan Lee

– Batman vs. Sherlock Holmes

– Zeus vs. Thor

– Bruce Banner vs Bruce Jenner

– Super Mario Bros. vs. Wright Bros.

– Moses vs. Santa Claus

What other superhero related music do you know? Comment below!

And Happy Easter to those celebrating

Frisky Friday – Super Sex

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I hear there are debates that go on about how sex might be with a superhero.

Superman – Faster than a speeding bullet. Sperm like a bullet. You’ll probably die on impact.

Harley Quinn – If you’re not the Joker, her heart won’t be in it, so expect to be disappointed.

Bruce Banner – Don’t make him angry.

Jean Grey – Either tender or death.

The Joker – Really wild, but you probably won’t arrive because it was all a joke to him.

Catwoman – She’s probably flexible, but she’ll just use you.

Ironman – Tony is all about himself so you’ll probably be disappointed.

Wonder Woman – Prepare to be submissive.

Wolverine – He’ll probably ghost you unless your name is Jean Grey.

Poison Ivy – Itchy or a lot of bondage. Maybe both.

Cyclops – You might die. Things happen and it would only take a second for his glasses to come off unexpectedly. Also, who does it with their glasses on anyway?

R~

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Thoughtful Thursday – Super Grateful

[image error]I’ve had a pretty amazing week.

Also a very emotional one per my other posts this week.

It has also been the kind where I discovered things about my relationships with certain people. I’m sad to say I lost someone I thought was a friend, but several other friendships have been strengthened and I’m immensely grateful for them.

Two have been helping me try to get a job at a company I’ve been wanting to work at for several years now. The first time, I applied to a job that I wasn’t qualified for. The second, the position was canceled. I’m truly hoping that the third time is a match.

To the super friends that have listened to me rant this week about the one that turned out to be different than I thought, thanks for listening.

I have a lot of wonderful people in my life that I’m super thankful for.

And I’m sorry to anyone who was looking for this post yesterday. Thank you for your patience with me as I near the completion of a year of school that was heavier than I thought it would be. You’ve been super too.

R~

Warrior Wednesday – The Bullied Become Super

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Gotham tells a different aspect of the Batman story.

Not having an in depth knowledge of Batman lore, I can’t say whether or not there’s been a story before that covers Bruce’s years from the time his parents were killed to when he becomes Batman other than the actual moment with the bats.

His story has always felt rather like Jesus’s to me in that way.

But it is also vastly different. Bruce wanted to never feel weak again.

Everything he does that leads to him becoming Batman is because of that moment of powerlessness he experienced while he was unable to prevent his parents’s deaths.

One of the things he decides is to learn to fight. He has a strong desire to stop bad things from happening ever again. What his specific qualifications are in terms of deciding right from wrong are unknown. He’s a boy who is bullied briefly and seeks revenge.

He has a lot of hurt inside him.

In martial arts, we often talk about things like the 8 samurai virtues. They provide guide posts for being a good person and for how to be as a student of martial arts.

The thing is that many are fueled by much darker things like revenge, hatred, or greed. And some of the best warriors weren’t honourable. One need only look at the story of Musashi and the oar to see that.

Musashi probably seemed to have supernatural powers to some people. He was undefeated and remains one of the most legendary swordsmen to have lived. But he, by all accounts, was just a man. A man whose career started out with those around him underestimating his abilities.

Gotham also shows us a young Penguin who was also bullied and underestimated. We see his early penchant for killing others. We see him rising into power.

Being a petite woman from a small town blue-collar family, I understand what it’s like to be underestimated. I was also bullied as a child, but I learned to forgive those who did so. Most were young and it was the late 80s and early 90s when divorce was becoming frequent, but no one really knew how to handle it or make it easier on their kids.

Perhaps one day, I’ll achieve some sort of greatness too. I felt super when I passed my Nidan grading in December. And I felt super last night until I stabbed myself slightly with my sword. Sometimes we have to learn the hard way.

And that’s how life’s river flows today.

R~

Theatrical Tuesday – Responsibility

[image error]Last night, my play was one of the ones that was read in front of an audience.

When I wrote it, I hoped at least one person would get something from it. I thought there would be one question about my friend, since I wrote it in memory of her.

As I watched it performed, I felt like I was giving a presentation only the actors were speaking my words and I was unable to have any control over how things went.

What I never expected was an audience that had many people that wanted to talk about it.

I was both happy about and absolutely mortified by this. There is nothing that feels more vulnerable than talking about your art. Inside, I was pretty much wanting to run away. For weeks before this, I’d think about what to say to any questions and I’d cry. I was worried about that.

I kept it together though. Somehow. I think that may have been because stage lights were blinding me and perhaps I went into the automatic mode from my old acting days? My friend who came said I didn’t look nervous at all. I felt like Wonder Woman, but also like a bug that could be squished at any moment.

What I’ve come away with because of this experience is a realization that I have a great responsibility in what I create. And yes, that realization came to me in Stan Lee’s voice, which is soooo geeky, but also awesome!

The words we write matter and that’s why it’s even more disgusting that journalism has gone the way it has.

So what’s next? Well, I got amazing feedback from the audience and the director. I’m going to extend the play and also make another based off this one that is in a different format that will work better for the ten minute window. Then I’ll enter it in contests and see what happens.

Whatever comes of that will inform what will happen with it after that.

And that’s how life’s river flows today.

R~

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Make-It Monday – A Super Week

[image error]Why are we obsessed with Superheroes and the idea of being super human?

I think that part of it is because we think we could do all the things we currently can’t.

There are goals that are often out of my reach simply because my quads aren’t strong enough yet or there isn’t enough time in the day. If I was fast like The Flash, I could achieve all my goals faster.

That doesn’t mean it would be better though.

Some things would be.

I could travel much more quickly than the stinky and undependable bus.

Part of this condo thing for me is a chance to go through everything I own and decide what needs to stay in my life. That’s the kind of thing that being super fast physically can’t help me with. I’d like having my condo all painted. It would certainly be better to be done, but painting too fast sends drops of paint places that I don’t want them to be as I’ve learned the hard way.

If I was super like a vampire, I wouldn’t have to worry about food as much, which would let me spend my money on other things, but I might have a whole bunch of other problems like only night hours to do anything in. Also, people start to notice if you never age and stay in the same place forever. Then someone’s trying to kill you because your lifestyle is different than theirs… Seems like a whole lot of things I’d rather avoid.

Super hearing or some kind of mind reading ability might let me find out how others feel about me, like a crush, but I might just hear that most people dislike me or think I’m a pathetic human. Unless my goal is to become the best gossiper ever, it’s probably not great.

If I could fly like Superman, I could travel all over. That would be pretty sweet as long as there’s no kryptonite nearby. Also, who has time to see the world if you’re always busy saving it?

I think the only real options available to me are to put blood, sweat, and tears into my work and to be smart about knowing when to outsource pieces during the process. The best writers don’t self-edit, for example. Also, some of the greatest artists had help like Michelangelo with his sculpture of David.

And there are so many people without superhero abilities that are wonderful! My friend is always making these cute bento box lunches for her son with heart-shaped cheese and little train-shaped sandwiches and such. I’m sure she seems like a superhero to him.

So how is this regular human doing on her goals this week?

Reno: Well, I’ve rearranged my living room and am going through the junk. My aim is to pitch or put away as much as possible, so I can paint when things are calmer.

School: This is a little hectic lately, but should calm down in a couple of weeks. I made the Dean’s honour list with my 3.89 GPA and that feels great!

Music: I made a breakthrough on the weekend with my guitar that I’m happy about.

Finances: I haven’t secured a job yet, but I have an opportunity and I’ve received some bursary money to help me survive for a couple more months.

Career: One of my plays is being read by actors tonight! It’s one I wrote to pay respects to a friend I lost in October. I’m a little nervous about it, but I’m also looking forward to seeing how it is received.

I’m off to bake some cookies for the bake sale that is also tonight at the reading. I hope you have a super week!

R~

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Symphonic Saturday – Unlocked

[image error]I made, what I think, is some real progress this week with my guitar. For whatever reason, I was able to push passed where I’ve been plateaued for awhile now.

It was like I could ignore the fact that I couldn’t keep up fully with the speed of the song and instead of that upsetting me, I just tried harder.

I’m learning Green Day’s Good Riddance (The Time of Your Life). We learned it in guitar class in high school, but I doubt we were playing it at full speed because it was pretty fast to play along with the YouTube video.

Even though I kept messing up and it probably sucked, I had fun and felt like I’m on the way to improving.

And that’s how life’s river flows today.

R~

Psst… If you’re in Ottawa and looking for something to do this Monday, March 26, 2018, one of my plays is being read by actors for a fund raiser. Some of my classmate’s plays will be read too. It’s all happening at 6pm at Algonquin College in room N112. The cost is $5. There will also be some baked goods available for purchase.

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Frisky Friday – 20+ Things to Expect After Legalization

[image error]As cannabis legalization slowly inches forward, I thought you could use a post that highlights some things to expect once it’s here.

Disclaimer: I’m not an expert, nor am I giving medical advice.

1. Home Design: You may experience sudden urges to rearrange your living space.

2. Food Innovation: An inherited skill where you make the most amazing and unexpected fusions.

3. Dinner Parties: A unique multi-course dining experience.

4. Increased Libido: It’s the closest thing to a woman’s Viagra.

5. The Munchies: Sometimes you might not even be hungry, but you want to feel something crunch against your teeth.

6. Reduced Inflammation: It’s a natural anti-inflammatory.

7. Higher Patience: You’ll be able to stay calm when an asshole is talking to you.

8. Time Distortion: You may have periods where you ran through whole scenarios in your head and thought you must’ve been gone for an hour when it’s only been 5 minutes.

9. Focus! Oooo, shiny…: You’ll either have great focus or be Dory. Some strains are better than others.

10. Temporary Paralysis: Also known as couch lock. As stress relieving as massage.

11. Healed Trauma: It’s the best thing for managing PTSD.

12. Dry/Cotton Mouth: Even worse when drinking too.

13. Forgetfulness: Some people forget their wallets more often.

14. Highs and Lows: Some strains lift you up and others bring you down.

15. Government Greed: Are they monopolizing the market where you are?

16. Reduced Fear: You might push through whatever plateau you’ve been stuck on.

17. Giving Less Fucks : If you’ve ever been told you have a stick in an unusual place, weed may help you lose it.

18. Music Taste: You might find yourself experimenting with Bob Marley.

19. Intolerant People: Remember that not everyone likes what you like and they might be asses about it.

20. Weird Sensations: Are your teeth floating in your mouth?

21. Paranoia: You *might* become convinced your friends are cannibals and you’re dinner. For more on how that might turn out, check out my short story The Third Wheel.

Happy Friday!

R~

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Thoughtful Thursday – The Lost One

[image error]This week, Erik Karlsson of the Ottawa Senators and his wife Melinda are going through the pain of miscarriage.

Miscarriage isn’t something people often speak of. It’s unpleasant..

Its most common recommended course of action is to try again as if you lost Roll Up the Rim.

This pain is something I know first hand.

In 2011, it happened to me. I wasn’t as far along as some, but we were nearly out of the danger period where miscarriage has a higher likelihood. We were almost ready to tell everyone the good news.

For me, the physical pain was not unlike menstrual cramping.

It was the emotional pain that I couldn’t deal with. I think we stopped by a Pizza Hut on the way home from the hospital for food? I only remember the bathroom stall.

It’s been nearly six and a half years and I am only finding the words now to talk about it.

Sometimes in pregnancy, a mom won’t know she’s pregnant. Sometimes they know right away. Sometimes it’s very gradual. For me, it was gradual. Maybe it was all the extra vitamins, or maybe it was the hormones, but I felt the best I’ve ever felt.

Because a pregnancy is very much like the connection a parasite and its host has, other feelings can happen.

Imagine, the baby growing within is like a plant whose roots are spreading out in the dirt. Only, we don’t have dirt within us. We have organs and such. When I miscarried, it was as if the plant was ripped out of me and my insides were torn to shreds. I didn’t know even how I was feeling. It was all so confusing. So I couldn’t talk about it.

Not even with my then husband.

Because I was so wrapped up in my own pain and confusion, I couldn’t even consider how he felt about it. He seemed to be trying to make me feel better without being able to understand what I was going through and I didn’t understand it, so I couldn’t help him understand it.

Ultimately, given that we are such different people, I think it’s a good thing that we didn’t have children together. I often feel guilty for feeling this way.

It was one of the most painful things I’ve experienced.

I wish I didn’t know what they are going through right now. I wish they didn’t know the pain of it either.

The only advice I can offer is to be kind and loving to each other. You both feel it differently, but you’re both going through it.

Also it’s important to know that it’s no one’s fault. Most times, it happens because there is something seriously wrong with the baby that even our modern neonatal specialists wouldn’t be able to fix.

This is one of the reasons I haven’t been in a rush to get serious with anyone despite wanting to be with someone and wanting to have a family.

But I think even something as awful as this is easier to endure with the right person.

R~

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Warrior Wednesday – Striking Out

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It’s a tough week for me.

A week filled with nerve-wracking things like pitching my TV show and my film, while also having actors read through my play for the fund-raiser.

Yesterday, we pitched our TV shows. Mine went well and the panel really liked the idea of it.

Last night, my 10-minute play was read by actors. I noticed some problems with it that I’ll need to fix before I submit it to any contests, but what an experience! The woman casted as my hockey mom character was bang on! And it was just a cold read through, which means she hadn’t ever seen the script before. I can’t wait to see what she does between now and rehearsal and then the reading on Monday! The others were great too, but I really felt that she brought it off the page the most. Oh, my teacher’s husband was awesome too. He’s a professional voice actor and has one of those voices that could make just about anything sound good.

But that meant I was at the college a little passed 9 pm last night. I didn’t get home until slightly after 10 pm and hadn’t had supper yet. It was around 11 pm by the time I had eaten.

Today, I’m fighting one hell of a headache. It’s one of those ones where I can’t tell if it’s actually my neck hurting, lack of sleep, lack of food, an allergic reaction, or something else like the stress of pitching my feature film earlier today.

Speaking about the feature film pitch, it didn’t go great. I realized it should be longer, but tried to add things in after the part I had memorized and that made it seem like my story arc is a mess when it’s not a mess in the script. We’ve been told by some people not to compare our films to other films and to do so by others. It’s falling out of favour supposedly, but I think I need to for mine to help set the mood for my pitch properly and reduce confusion.

Anyway, I came into this day much like a warrior would, having poor sleep and other really not ideal things going on. That’s life though.

In the end, it doesn’t matter so much that it didn’t go well because I’ll have more opportunities to fix it and I learned key things that will help me do so. Were it a sword though, I would be dead. Instead, I learned a lot that will hopefully help me do well in the future.

With only a couple of weeks until the big pitch trip in Toronto, I’ll be rewriting my pitch and testing it on friends before I go.

And that’s how life’s river flows today.

R~

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