Emily Conrad's Blog, page 16

Thanksgiving in Good Times

A handful of red and orange leaves are still blowing around the neighborhood. I collected a few on my last walk and set them in the crook at the base of the big maple out front, finding in the process that it had some lovely green moss to add to the picture.

The display of color made me wonder: Has frost deepened the colors of these leaves? Or were there entire trees full of reds and oranges like these just a month ago? Did I miss just how marvelously the burgundy and orange red glowed because they were everywhere?

Lifting my eyes even now proves that there's still stunning color on a few trees, suggesting that I'm only just now, as I lose it, coming to better appreciate something nature's been gifting me with for an entire season.
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I've seen this principle at work in other areas of life, too.

So often, it takes something negative to remind us of how good we have it. We don't know what we have until something we love has a close call, is at risk, fading, or gone. Near misses and scares remind us of how much we have to lose, how nothing is truly in our control, how very much we've taken for granted. In those times, we cling to gratitude to the One who's given us everything.

Thank you, God, for sparing us. for this amazing life on earth, for the wonderful promises You've made for eternity.

That depth of gratitude is hard to keep in the long term. We move on into better times and forget how fragile life is and how much we depend on God.

This ungratefulness and forgetfulness were a danger to the Israelites, too.


When you eat your fill, when you build and occupy good houses,
Eat your fill? How many of us will do that today? How many of us are occupying good houses? Have savings? Have abundance?

Thank God for Thanksgiving! Because in good times like these, we cannot let our expressions of gratitude wane. The practice of thankfulness points us back to the One who gave us the blessings in the first place. Thankfulness helps keep us from becoming self-important, self-reliant, or reliant on the blessings themselves.

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This is vital because our true life source for now and eternity is God. We must rely on Him and Him alone. We must remember that even if we haven't seen our lives flash before our eyes recently, dangers still surround us, and our every breath relies on God's protection and sustaining grace.

God's provision is the only reason I'm able to sit at this laptop and type this post.

I owe Him for everything. The laptop. The Internet (even if Blogger, for whatever reason, keeps glitching when I add photos to this post). The freedom to write. The ability to order words. The table I'm preparing for today's feast. The fact that I need someone to bring extra chairs because I have more family than seats.

In this good time, I'm pausing to remember just how good it is.

Empty seats at the table are far too easy to come by. Health to cook is a blessing not all experience. Serving not just one but four desserts would be, for many around the world and even in this community, untouchable luxury. Many, many obstacles keep families apart this time of year, yet mine will mostly gather. And I owe it all to God.

I don't want the richness of this season to blind me to my need and dependence on Jesus. I don't want to wait until something in my life fades or falls like autumn leaves before I pause to say, Thank you, Father, for these good, good gifts.

If you're in a good season, I hope you'll join me in remembering that these blessings are gifts from God to be enjoyed while they're here--but never at the cost of putting them before the Giver.

If you're in a hard season now, I pray that the God of peace will reveal Himself to you and comfort you with His love. Though other blessings may come and go from our lives, that gift, God's love for His children, is a constant which will see us through it all.

Happy Thanksgiving,











Don't forget in good times just how much we have to be #thankful for - via @novelwritergirl

The Discipline of Standing in Winter (and a Recipe for Creative Writing)

Feeling a little short on inspiration recently, I made a jar of word salsa. The idea stemmed from the Five Minute Friday Community as well as October's 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes, during which writers are challenged to free write based on one-word prompts. Since the prompts can usually get me writing if I sit down with them, I decided to create my own, steady supply of what I hope will turn out to be rich words.

Word Salsa Ingredients
- Slips of paper (from scrapbook paper or pages of a fancy coloring book that are mostly blank on one side)
- Jar
- Pen
- Words

How To
To come up with enough words, it helped to sit and think through the alphabet, naming all the A words I thought of that would be inspiring before moving on to B, etc. Then, I put the words in an old salsa jar. Another option is to enlist friends to write words for you. Write one word per slip, fold 'em up, and fill up the jar. Draw a word to use as a prompt when you're short on ideas.

Without further ado, here's what I wrote when I drew the word 'bud.'



The Discipline of Standing in Winter

When I drew the word 'bud,' I was disappointed at how short it was. How much inspiration could be in three little letters, in such a simple word? But the truth is, this morning is a bud of its own. The desire I felt to finally draw a word from the jar and write, a bud.

Creativity and inspiration, like trees, die back sometimes. They wave bare arms to the sky in surrender. The words, like leaves, blow away, and though the tree grew them, it is powerless to force it to happen anew.

Instead, trees are left to the discipline of standing tall in the cold. Of holding up flakes of snow until the sun melts them into life-prompting water.


The water trickles down, beneath the surface where we can see. Slow words like seep and absorb describe the mystery, taking place in darkness, the most important transactions happening where we might suspect them (or not) but where we will never witness them.

And then, the budding begins.

Sometimes, all at once, but often, battling fits of snow and cold until late spring brings with it hints of a summer that will last for months, at least.

Those months of warm opportunity, we must seize. We must grow and savor the sun, we must bend with winds and shade our yards and throw seeds to carry us from one year to the next. Because fall will come again, with its overcast skies and trees the color of sun, its friend winter chasing after it.

Rest assured in times of winter, whether your winter is related to creativity or something else, or short or long, even trees that appear dead and frozen carry the secret ingredients of life, mixable only by the hand of the Creator. At the appointed time, these trees break open hope, fresh and green, waving life in the sun, proving again and again that winter cannot steal the propensity to bud.








Even trees that appear frozen carry the secret ingredients of life #inspiration via @novelwritergirl

People-Pleasing and Galatians Part 2

This discussion about what we can learn from the book of Galatians in regards to people-pleasing started on Tuesday. You can read that post here.


The theme of that first post is nicely summed up by Galatians 1:10, which reads: Am I now trying to gain the approval of people, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a slave of Christ! (NET)

Why did Paul write this to the Galatians? He was encouraging them to resist (and not please) the people who were pressuring them to submit to the old law of circumcision. It sounds to me as though Paul wrote with urgency because the Galatians were starting to give in.

He writes, You foolish Galatians! Who has cast a spell on you? Before your eyes Jesus Christ was vividly portrayed as crucified! The only thing I want to learn from you is this: Did you receive the Spirit by doing the works of the law or by believing what you heard? Are you so foolish? Although you began with the Spirit, are you now trying to finish by human effort? Galatians 3:1-3, NET

Did you catch that? Paul moved from people-pleasing to another closely-related area: perfectionism.


I know I, for one, can tend toward perfectionism all on my own, but we're also often encouraged that direction by the fact that people see and judge our actions (rather than our hearts). When we're stuck in this trap, we run ourselves ragged trying to live up to some imagined ideal that God never called us to because other people expect it of us.

These people are easier to see with human eyes than the risen Jesus. The criticisms of how we live are easier to hear than the still small voice of our Savior—especially when we haven’t been spending adequate time with him. So, we set about pleasing the people by saying yes to everything at church. We take failure hard. We vow to try harder or do better next time.

This is foolish because no matter how hard we try, we’re always wanting. Sure, maybe we do manage to please a few people some of the time, but that was never supposed to be the point of our lives. We were created by God and for God, but we’ll never satisfy Him by our efforts.

The only way to peace with God is through faith, as Paul writes in 2:16: yet we know that no one is justified by the works of the law but by the faithfulness of Jesus Christ. And we have come to believe in Christ Jesus, so that we may be justified by the faithfulness of Christ and not by the works of the law, because by the works of the law no one will be justified. (NET)

I often fail to look at perfectionism and people-pleasing as the traps they are, so it hits me when Paul writes: For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not be subject again to the yoke of slavery.

People-pleasing and perfectionism are slavery, and recognizing them as such will help us to choose better in the future. Christ died so we could be free.


Instead of slavery, we're invited into a relationship with the Creator. Knowing Him and being known by Him is so vital. It’s the only way we can live led by the Spirit, reaping “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” (Galatians 5:22, NET)

Life and faith are not about making “a good showing of external matters.” (from 6:12, NET)

Life and faith are about our hearts, which must be loyal to Christ above all else.

So forget about everyone else and all their opinions. Embrace Jesus.








Life and faith aren't about putting on a good show. Forget others' opinions. Embrace Jesus. via @novelwritergirl
PS Want more reading on people-pleasing, perfectionism, and how our relationship with Jesus can save us? Check out the Chosen and Approved series that just wrapped up earlier this month! For links to all the posts, click here.

PPS Since all the lovely photos in the main body of this post (but not the Chosen and Approved graphic) were from the same photographer, I wanted to let you know. You can check out Kortni Williams' work here.

People-Pleasing and Galatians Part 1

I read the book of Galatians in one sitting. I didn’t start off meaning to go through the entire thing, but verse 1:10 sunk a hook deep in my people-pleasing heart that pulled me all the way through:

Am I now trying to gain the approval of people, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a slave of Christ! (1:10, NET)

When was the last time I took people pleasing that seriously? How about you?

I do recognize people-pleasing as a problem, but I wouldn't normally admit that tendency has the power to pull me away from Christ. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what pleasing people does.

When people say something God hasn’t said, and I start striving after that, my allegiances have shifted.



Perhaps this is why, when Paul encounters Jesus, he didn’t go to any people for advice or acceptance.

Paul writes, But when the one who set me apart from birth and called me by his grace was pleased to reveal his Son in me so that I could preach him among the Gentiles, I did not go to ask advice from any human being, nor did I go up to Jerusalem to see those who were apostles before me, but right away I departed to Arabia, and then returned to Damascus.

Then after three years I went up to Jerusalem to visit Cephas and get information from him, and I stayed with him fifteen days. (1:15-18, NET)

I don’t know about you, but my first inclination would’ve been to run to the other believers and ask, “Am I doing this right? Can you help me? Is this okay? What do I need to do?”

And there is a place for godly counsel. But Paul warns us by example and in no uncertain terms why relying first on people is a recipe for disaster: They court you eagerly, but for no good purpose; they want to exclude you, so that you would seek them eagerly. (Galatians 4:17, NET)

It's human nature to be wanted and to feel important, so some people will seek to control us. They’ll say it’s for our own good, but their real motivations might be much darker. And if we’re set on pleasing people, we’ll fall victim to it.

So, first and foremost, like Paul, our counsel needs to be Jesus himself.

How can we do this? It comes back to the basics: prayer and study. If we're not reading the Bible regularly, we'll lose sight of what it says and become distracted by what the people around us are saying. When we listen to the One who died for us, we won't seek the approval of men.


The book of Galatians has a lot more to say about people-pleasing. If this was an encouragement to you, consider sitting down with the book and perhaps stopping back on Thursday for the second part of this post.

In the meantime, realizing how much Galatians has to say about such a recurring theme in my life has me wondering: which book of the Bible has met you where you are in an extra-special way recently?









When we’re listening to the one who died for us, we’re not seeking the approval of men via @novelwritergirl

Toppling Pedestals

The intention is never to raise something on a pedestal, but working toward or loving something for years tends to prop it up a little higher and a little higher.

Take a desire to write novels, for example. That can be a wonderful calling, but it takes a long time to accomplish. And over that time, a dream like that can slowly, gradually, gain unhealthy status in a writer’s heart. I would know.

Whether for you it’s writing or something else, often we don’t realize we’ve been standing in this thing’s shadow until that pedestal starts to wobble. Or worse, the whole thing tumbles down.

And then, we grieve and struggle. Without that shadow covering us, we squint and try to adjust. What do we do now? What went wrong? How do we move forward?

The transition is difficult because when we put earthly things on pedestals, we focus on them and lose Jesus’ perspective. We block the fullness of his light in our lives.

Knowing this from experience, I’ll ask you: What might be on a pedestal in your life? What if it fell apart today? What if it took a painful turn?

No, really. What if it did?



Step out from that shadow, friend.

We do this by recognizing our lives are about the everlasting God and his glory, and that it’s possible such a God has something entirely different for us than what we envision. It is possible that our earthly dreams will be deferred, as Hebrews 11:13-16 emphasizes:

These all died in faith without receiving the things promised, but they saw them in the distance and welcomed them and acknowledged that they were strangers and foreigners on the earth. For those who speak in such a way make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. In fact, if they had been thinking of the land that they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they aspire to a better land, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore, God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them. (NET)

Yes, God has given us our dreams and talents to use them. He has a glorious plan for each life, and we are each uniquely gifted to fulfill our purpose. He will ensure that we have what we need to serve him. But he is to be lifted up, not the gifts he gives. When we focus on Jesus, he gives us not a single little pedestal but an entire city, a homeland.



And next to this beautiful eternity with him and the relationship he invites us to, pedestal-toppers are nothing. When earthly hopes topple, we have eternal hope. In times of discouragement, we are called to draw close once again to Jesus in all of his marvelous splendor and light, to hope not in what will happen in this life, but in the next. Joy is set before us.







When earthly hopes topple, we have eternal #hope - via @novelwritergirl

Chosen and Approved: Whatever She's Having, Please

My aunt and uncle took us into the toy store in the mall and made an amazing promise: my sister and I could each pick one item—ANY item in the store—and they would get it for us.

Talk about eight-year-old heaven. Looking back as an adult, I wonder how big of a risk my aunt and uncle took that day. What was the most expensive toy in the store? How big was it?

Well, my sister and I took stock of the inventory, and my sister made her choice: a mechanical dog about ten inches tall with soft white fur. It walked on a leash, barked, and did back flips.

When I declared that I wanted the same thing, my aunt tried to gently talk me out of it. Wouldn’t I prefer a horse? Because, after all, I loved everything to do with horses. I read books about them, collected Breyer horses, drew them, used them in imaginary play. Everything was about horses.

But I passed up all the pretty horses in that store to get what my sister was getting.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t something as cute as trying to be like my older sister. I’m the older one. The one who should have a mind of her own.

But this wasn’t the first time (or last, unfortunately) I’d wanted something just because someone else was getting it.

And then once I had it? We played with our dogs some. But then the novelty wore off, and I returned to my horse obsession. Who knows? Maybe any toy would’ve been forgotten pretty quickly. In fact, maybe it would’ve been less memorable if my sister and I didn’t both have barking, flipping dogs with which to annoy the household.

Yet I look back and suspect my choice was rooted in insecurity, a problem which, in some ways, has grown with me into adulthood.

Recently faced with a decision where there was no one else who could make the choice for me and no moral right or wrong, I went round and round with what I should do. Insecurity told me I couldn’t trust my own judgement, just like I felt like I couldn’t trust it that day in the store with my aunt and uncle.

It tells me all kinds of other things, too: if someone else wants something, I should want it to; what I have isn’t enough, and I should to surrender my tastes to envy of others; what I have is okayish, but what others have is amazing.


Insecurity doesn’t value my own preferences enough to honor them. Insecurity would prefer I spend my life mirroring others.

This propensity to follow the crowd is most obviously a problem if we choose to give in to sin because we see others getting away with it. And, there is the issue of envy that naturally grows from this kind of insecurity.

But copycat behavior can also steal something more subtle than that: the beautiful gift of our uniqueness.


Giving that up goes against our faith. We’ve been fearfully and wonderfully made by our Creator, so in the areas that aren’t a matter of right and wrong, we honor God by expressing our one-of-a-kind personality in the option we take.

Where insecurity says we must envy and copy others, faith says God has a wonderful, unique plan for each life. Our individual personality and tastes and opinions further that plan.

So put down the toy dog and back away. Choose something uniquely you.








Where #insecurity says we must copy others, faith says God has a unique plan for each life via @novelwritergirl

Following the Holy Spirit

The brightly colored note cards had been sitting next to my stamps for so long the glue on some of the envelopes was starting to come undone. They still looked nice, but I suspect they wouldn't have much longer.

On a hunch that I hoped was from God, I took the cards to this fall's ACFW conference in Nashville. On each, I wrote a verse and, on some of them, a little encouragement to go along with it. I then handed them out to random attendees, some of whom I knew and some I didn’t.

It was uncomfortable for me. Who was I to be trying to encourage others like this? How could I be sure it was God who'd given me the idea? Had I even picked “good” verses? And if they were good ones, would they resonate with the particular women who got them, or would they be discarded as soon as I walked away?



Truth be told, I can't say for sure in most cases if the verses did relate to the situations of the women to whom I handed them. However, two of the women opened the cards right in front of me. One told me the verse was something of a life theme for her. The other said she had the same verse on her mantle at home.

I don’t know the stories of all the verses I handed out, but I am glad I acted when I heard what I suspected was the Holy Spirit.

Are you considering following promptings you feel are from Jesus? Then know he doesn't prompt us and then leave us on our own to complete the mission. He prompts us and walks us through every step.

He prompted me to write the cards. He prompted me to pick the verses I did. He led women to pick just the right card. Without God, not even two of those would've ever made it to the right hands.

So, I believe God was in the process. But how do we tell? Does that nagging little idea of yours line up with your Bible? What happens when you pray about it or mention it to believing friends?

Don't discount ideas just because they aren't that much of a stretch. Sometimes they do stretch us, but sometimes it's as non-threatening as handing out Bible verses at a Christian conference.

Simplicity doesn't make the mission any less important, the call any less divine.



Being used to encourage others to the glory of God isn’t some mysterious process. Often, it’s following that little prompting that starts with “Wouldn’t it be cool to…”

Jesus gives us our godly passions and callings because he wants us to follow them.

And when we follow in those smaller steps, I believe it helps to train us to follow in the bigger ones, too. It shows us what God's voice sounds like once so we'll recognize it again next time and hear it that much louder and more clearly.

Sometimes, I build up the idea of hearing God or following the Holy Spirit to be some complicated, out-of-reach chore. That's not the truth.

Following God isn't rocket science. It's relationship. And not only that, but relationship of the most fulfilling variety.


How about stepping out in faith to do that little something He's calling you to today?









Following God isn't rocket science. It's relationship. via @novelwritergirl

Chosen and Approved: You Are, Identity in Christ

I can't believe there's only one more week of the Chosen and Approved series left! What I'm loving from this week's post?

This line: The world paints lies with just enough detail to resemble your outline.

That's what makes the lies we hear about ourselves so convincing. They start with a seed of reality and skew to the negative. And then, as Mary Geisen writes in this week's post, The world shouts you are not enough. The voices fill your head with: unworthy, unloved, and unable. 

But of course, the story doesn't end there. There's a competing Voice, One that's true through and through and has a lot to say about who you really are. Check it out here in Mary's post on Passage Through Grace.








You can listen to the world say who you are, or you can listen to I AM #chosenandapproved @MaryGeisen @novelwritergirl

Free Write Day 28: Eat

I get embarrassed when I eat something I’m not supposed to eat.

As one with several allergies and sensitivities, it comes up from time to time, most recently because I was brought regular fries after I specified I needed gluten-free. By the time the waiter told me the fries hadn’t been gluten free, it was too late. I’d already been snacking on them, and could now expect the side-effects I experience when I eat gluten. Yet I didn’t make a fuss.

I kept quiet because I was embarrassed. I felt I should’ve known better, since my fries are never seasoned at that restaurant, but those were. I should’ve known to question them.

When I explained how embarrassing I find that kind of situation to my husband, I realized not everyone feels that way. So why does eating something I shouldn’t embarrass me?

I don’t like to be wrong. I hate to make mistakes that can’t be undone. Once I eat something, that’s it. No going back. I’m fully committed, even if it turns out to have been a mistake.

I think of Eve, her mouth full of forbidden fruit, and I think of Adam, following suit.

Though it doesn’t necessarily involve the physical act of eating, each of us follow after their example, fully committed to the ripe sins we pick and devour. We should’ve known. We vow to do better next time. But we commit fully, time and time again, filling our spiritual bellies with that which kills.

There’s no going back. We can’t undo our unfaithfulness to our Creator. We and our fallen world will experience consequences.

But, in our shame and despair, Jesus comes to offer us a radically different meal.

Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life. The one who comes to me will never go hungry, and the one who believes in me will never be thirsty.” (John 6:35, NET)

This whole sin mess started with food. With eating what we were not to eat. And now, despite all the bad meals we’ve swallowed, in Jesus, we’re offered the Bread of Life and Living Water.

He took our need for this so seriously that he died to satisfy my hunger and yours. After turning to Christ, will we never choose sin again? I’m sorry to say that I know we will. Yet in Christ, our sins are forgiven, washed clean, and we need not be embarrassed or ashamed. We need only to come to him and to believe in him, the Bread of Life, the Living Water.











PS There are just a few days left in the 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Write challenge and link up going on over at Creativeandfree.com. Check it out here or all of my related posts here. My disclaimer for today is that this post used the prompt for the day (eat) but took a lot more than 5 minutes.

Jesus took our need so seriously that he died to satisfy my hunger and yours via @novelwritergirl #Write31Days

Free Write: When Poetry Leaves

When Poetry Leaves

Poetry up and left
just when I needed her most.
Doesn’t she know she’s a ladder
or at least a guide in the dark?
Her feet, retreating, so quiet
ears don’t notice her go
until the crippled remains
pound the drums of language,
meaning lost in the noise.
Mute, and mostly deaf,
I borrow your Words
     I burrow in,
     I memorize,
     I call them mine.
You are the Poetry,
the only Word I must speak,
the only Ladder I need,
the only Guide who redeems.

Though this post doesn't follow one of the assigned prompts, I drafted it in 5 minutes (with a little editing after), and am including it as part of the 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes challenge. Find out more about the challenge here, or read all of my responses to the challenge here.








You are the Poetry, the only Word I must speak via #novelwritergirl #5MFW #write31days