Sheritta Bitikofer's Blog, page 22

How do you say “Natchitoches”?

First, don’t try to pronounce it like it’s spelt, because that’s wrong. It’s like “Nack-a-tish”. I first learned about the city when I was reading the Cane River Romance series by Mary Jane Hathaway. All the while I was reading it, I was pronouncing it just the way it was spelt. When I was talking with a fellow coworker who was also born in Louisiana as I was, she corrected me. It took days to get myself out of the habit of saying “Natch-it-oe-chess”. So embarrassing, seeing as I was born in Louisiana too.

The town is rich in history and character. It was the original French colony in Louisiana, the oldest permanent settlement in the state, when it served as a major port city for Louisiana. It was founded in 1714 to promote trade with the local Indians and the Spanish in Mexico. From there, it flourished and boomed after the Louisiana purchase when the population more than quadrupled. From there, the cotton industry spurred the buildings of many beautiful plantation homes that still stand today like Oakland Plantation and Melrose Plantation. In the 1830s, however, the river shifted its course by 5 miles and left Natchitoches without a direct outlet to the sea except at times of high water. So, what exists today is a picturesque Cane River Lake bordered by plantations and old shops along Front Street.

What brought on this visit was a few different things. My husband was commissioned to build a chair for another member of the SCA and she happened to live in Texas. I reasoned that instead of paying an arm and leg for shipping and worrying about that, we imply drive over there one weekend. Because it’d still be a long drive for us, I knew we’d want to spend the night somewhere. Natchitoches was the first thing to pop in my head when thinking of a place to stay. I had mentioned Mary Jane Hathway before in another blog. She is a phenomenal romance author and in her Cane River Romance series, the stories take place in Natchitoches. If you haven’t read anything of Mary Jane Hathways, I highly recommend you do so.The town sounded like a place I definitely wanted to visit. I’m a history buff, especially for southern history and just the fact they have plantations makes me want to move there.

But I never imagined it would be this wonderful.

We arrived around 4pm to our bed and breakfast, the Judge Porter House on 2nd street in Natchitoches. I have never stayed in a bed and breakfast before, so I wasn’t totally sure what to expect. I’ve always wanted to stay in one because they often are old renovated homes from the civil war era or beyond. This house was built in 1912 (same year of Titanic’s maiden – and last – voyage) by Judge Thomas Porter and his wife, Wilhelmina (such a pretty name). It passed down through a few families until it fell into the hands of the current owner who opened it for business as a bed and breakfast in 1994. Pretty much all of the furniture in the home is antique and belonged to local families who either sold the furniture to the house or donated it.

The house, simply approaching it, is breathtaking in itself. With a spacious wrap-around porch that I’ve always wanted and rocking chairs, it’s hard not to be instantly charmed. But, stepping through the doorway was a whole new level of “wow”. Crystal chandeliers hang in EVERY room. I’m not kidding. Foyer, lounge rooms, second floor landing, dining room, everywhere. Only place they are not is in the bedrooms and those have ceiling fans. By the way, if you visit Natchitoches at all, pick a time during the fall or spring when it’s not too hot. It’s July. It’s HOT. Not a smart choice on my part, but the house has AC, so I can’t complain too much.

Everything is antique from the chairs, the side tables, the paintings, everything. The house is outfitted with electric lights and modern plumbing, of course, but otherwise, I feel as if I’ve stepped back in time and I feel right at home. I tease Jared that this is the kind of home I’d always wanted, but it’s true. The ceilings are high, giving a very homey and spacious feel to the rooms throughout the house. The dining room is immaculate! Honestly, when I was deciding on which bed and breakfast to stay at (because there’s only a hundred in Natchitoches), I picked the Judge Porter House because of their spectacular dining hall. I knew I couldn’t pass up eating breakfast in a place like that. I do not regret my decision and was not disappointed at all.

When we got settled in, the owners of the establishment were not in and I think we are sharing the house with another couple across the hall, but that’s it.

We rested for a while and decided to walk down to the river. As I said before, it’s HOT. But, there is practically no parking on Front Street anyway, so it ended up being a good decision. Walking down the strip was so fun for me. I got to look in the old, antique shop windows and sit by the river. It smelt rank for a while, but I got used to it. I imagine most rivers don’t smell very pleasant.

As we walked, I couldn’t help but imagine Mary Jane Hathaway’s characters walking the same path that I was. I could easily see Alice Augustine’s store By The Book amongst the many little shops along the river with it’s two apartments on top where she lives in the story “The Pepper in the Gumbo”. I could also see Gideon from “These Sheltering Walls” sitting on one of the rod iron benches late into the night, watching the store and Henry’s (a girl, her middle name is Henry and prefers to go by that) apartment above it to ensure she’s safe. Hence, the picture I took of the benches. I’m such a book nerd.

Looks like Gideon forgot his drink this morning (tee hee)

We sat down to a wonderful dinner at The Landing, one of the many places to eat in Natchitoches on Front Street. When you visit, get the crab and artichoke dip for an appetizer. It’s delicious! As is everything else on their menu. I seriously thought I’d go into a food coma, it was all amazing. From reading Mary Jane Hathaway’s novels, my interest was piqued to try a meat pie. So, I made a special request for a mini one because I knew I wouldn’t be able to eat a whole one. If you haven’t had a meat pie before, you need to try one. They’re so tastey.

I enjoyed the conversation with my husband while there. We came up with yet another story idea for me to write. You’ll probably learn about it later. It seems like every time we go out and have a pleasant evening together, he always comes up with some new story plot for me to roll with. We developed half of the plot already before the main entrees came. However, I did NOT enjoy the walk home. I was far too bloated.

The next morning, we attended breakfast at the B&B. Again, this was my first time at a B&B and I hardly knew what to expect when breakfast came. I was hoping this would not be the thing that ruined the trip for me. And I’m happy to say that it didn’t. We dined with a couple from Arkansas who were there vacationing for their 10th wedding anniversary that weekend. The company was great and the breakfast was phenomenal! Patricia, the innkeeper, started us off with peach cobbler as a first course. I didn’t care for the nuts, but I loved the touch of desert in the morning. The second course consisted of a slice of quiche, hashbrown casserole, a few slices of tomato and an English muffin. Ya’ll, I was about ready to tell my husband to bring the wheel barrow around to cart me out. The food was so flavorful I couldn’t stop myself from eating EVERYTHING on my plate. I was full all the way until 6pm that evening.

When we returned to our rooms, they had already been freshened with new towels and bath supplies. The hospitality was impeccable.

Saturday was spent delivering that chair to our friend in Canton Texas and then visiting with family in south Louisiana. Truth be told, this was the highlight of my trip. I try to make a point of always visiting them when we are even remotely near the area. Four hours may not classify as “near” but close enough.

After arriving back into Natchitoches around midnight, I slept soundly until the next morning. Breakfast with the Arkansas couple again, as well as another couple that had arrived the evening before while we were gone. They were from Texas and attending a wedding in town. Lovely people too. Patricia hooked us up with apple crisp for a first course, which I wish we could have gotten the recipe for) and sour cream grits (drool!) and omelette for second course. I could NOT pass up one ounce of this food, so once again I was full well into the afternoon.

One thing I had been dying to do is take a tour on one of the plantations in Natchitoches. Melrose plantation was open on Sunday, so we went over and took a guided tour from a man that was very enthusiastic about the history of the estate. You’ll see some pictures from the plantation (what I was allowed to take) below.

The Melrose plantation was founded and built by a freed slave, Louis Metoyer, a child with a white slave-owning father, Claude Thomas Pierre Metoyer and a slave mother, Marie Theresa CoinCoin. His father purchased his freedom, along with his mother’s and sibling’s. When he came of age, he was deeded 911 acres where he built the estate and stayed in the Yucca house that still stands on the property. Later this was used for the tenant farmers that served on the property. The estate had many outbuildings, including what they called the African House, which was primarily used for storing crops just behind the big house, and a barn that still stands today.

African House

The big house’s construction finished construction in the 1830s after the death of Louis Metoyer. It passed down through many hands in the family until 1847 when it was purchased by the Hertzog family. The plantation, amazingly survived the Red River campaign of the Civil War and remained as a working farm until 1881. For a time, it even became a school for freed slaves so they may earn an education.

In 1884, Joseph Henry bought the estate. It later passed to John Hampton Henry and Cammie Garrett Henry, spurring an era of the plantation that was quite remarkable and made me love the place even more.

When Cammie became a widow, she grew lonely for society and bored out of her mind. However, she was miles away from town, so instead of going to society, she decided to bring society with her. She set up the plantation as an artist’s retreat for writers and painters. They could stay on the property as long as they liked at her expense, but they had to be busy working on some project. Many renown authors visited there. They even had a copy of John Steinback’s “Of Mice and Men” on display, autographed by Steinback himself and addressed to Cammie. I looked around and same many of the inside covers were written “To Aunt Cammie”. What I wouldn’t give to have been an author back then and live on the estate like that! It sounds like a dream. Cammie also spent much of her time weaving and sewing. She built a building on the estate specially for it. We got to see a few pieces of her handwork displayed in the big house. By the way, if you’re wondering why there are no pictures of the inside of the house, it’s because they wouldn’t let us. I would have been snapping pictures all over the place of the antique books and furniture. It was gorgeous inside.

Something that Melrose is famous for is one of its former employees, Clementine Hunter, a world-renown painter who used to work for Cammie on the plantation. We got to see some of her original works inside the big house, as well as a quilt she had made. She discovered her talent one day while cleaning out a room that an artist had recently vacated after completing a project. The artist left behind paint tubes that were mostly empty, so Clemetine took what little the tubes would give and began painting her depictions of plantation life. Her work has been displayed in museums across the country and even in the Louvre in Paris, France.

If you are in Natchitoches and want to visit a truly inspiring historical site, Melrose should certainly be on your list. However, upon arriving home and beginning to read “These Sheltering Walls” again by Mary Jane Hathaway, I discovered I should have visited Oakland Planation, where the character Henry Byrd primarily worked during the story. I promptly texted my husband and told him we had to go back. I don’t care if I have to go on a weekend without him, I want to right the wrong I have committed and go to Oakland Planation. When, I have no idea. If it were up to me, I’d go this next weekend.

One thing I was bummed about was that the Bayou Folk Museum, which was also the house where Kate Chopin (author of “The Awakening”, one of the first feminist novels of the 19th century) lived for a few years had been burned down in 2008 and I couldn’t go see it. I read her novel in high school and was so eager to visit the home. I personally think they should rebuild the house to the exact specs of the original. It broke my heart, though, to learn that so much local history went up in flames that day. I read in an article that they did find a copy of Chopin’s “Bayou Folk” amongst the remains, still in tact. We saw this sign behind one of the outbuildings at Melrose Planation.

Overall, I truly enjoyed our stay in Natchitoches. It was not near long enough and I hope to return someday soon. Perhaps going for a week next time instead of just a weekend. There’s so much to do there and I know I barely scratched the surface.

“Clouds” NOW AVAILABLE FOR PRE-ORDER ON AMAZON KINDLE!!!!

It has been a LONG two months since I started working on “Clouds” again, but it’s finally available for Pre-Order with a set release date for August 20th. Check it out on Amazon Kindle at the link below and visit the “Clouds” page here on my blog for a sneak peak and little “behind the scenes” details about the story.

I have great hopes for this novel. I began writing it in my junior year of high school and when I set to the task of editing, I had to do a total overhaul on it (as I’m having to do with a lot of my old stories anyway).  I’m satisfied with the direction I took with it and I hope my readers will enjoy it.

Above all, I hope it makes them think. Think about our world and all that we tolerate. It may offend some and it may open the eyes of others, but my main goal with this story is to entertain readers with a story full of suspense, danger and a genuine love forged from the fires of adversity.

What’s next from me, you might ask? Well, I can say this, I’m glad to be moving on to a more contemporary romance. Yep, this one is set in today’s world as we know it. No medieval jousting, alternate universes or futuristic Holocaust stories this time. But, I can’t say that there won’t be a twinge of science fiction to it. I’m really excited for this next novel because it was the first one I wrote all the way through and I finished it in my sophomore year of high school. I’ve noticed that I’m kind of working backwards. “The Princess and Her Rogue” was the last one I finished, then “Escape”, then “Clouds” and now “The Rose”. I’ve got a LOT of editing and revising to do, so it may not be until sometime in October before I can announce a release date, but I’ll be sure to blog my progress with any sneak peaks.

In the meantime though, enjoy any of my other already released novels on Amazon. You can find their links in their corresponding pages on this blog.

Happy reading!

Another Sneak Peak Into My Upcoming Novel “Clouds”

So, I completed “Clouds” a few weeks ago and turned it in with my two handy editing friends. I got one copy back last night, but I’m still waiting on the other. Once I do, I’ll make the necessary changes and while I’m editing through it one time, I’ll have it up and available for pre-order on Amazon Kindle. Stay tuned for that as well as the release of the book trailer that I’ll be posting here, on my Facebook and Youtube.

In the meantime though, here’s another sneak peak into one of the scenes between Luke and Tabitha.

Luke ordered their meal, more muffled noises were heard and the car pulled forward. A more clear voice not too far from the car window repeated Luke’s total price of the food and Tabitha made sure to not even breathe too heavily, fearing that the inquisitive worker might see her moving.

He paid the amount, and then pulled forward one more time. Tabitha could aroma the food floating out from the windows and her gut roared against her, begging for nutrition.

She heard the crinkling of paper as the scent grew stronger and Luke drove away speedily. Tabitha waited patiently, sniffing her dinner and then she wondered something.

“Where are we going now?” she asked.

“You’ll see.”

After a long while, the road became progressively bumpier, her joints knocking against the hard floor of the car.

Suddenly, the car stopped. All was quiet. Tabitha couldn’t hear any cars, any honking, nothing. No noise at all.

“Where are we?”

Luke cut off the engine and the chirping of birds graced her ears. “Outside of town out in the woods somewhere. I found this old path while I was driving one day and I thought it’d be the perfect hiding spot.”

He opened his door, stepped out and then opened the back door, giving Tabitha the cue that it was perfectly safe here.

She threw off the blanket, leaving it in the back seat and crawled out of the car. Tabitha found herself surrounded by luscious greenery of trees, flowers and all sorts of plants she had never seen before. Tabitha had never even ventured outside of Shiloh and had only ever seen such colorful things in her wild fantasies and dreams. They seemed miles away from any form of civilization.

Her senses were filled with pleasant melodies of the songbirds and fresh air coated the heady scent of flora. But what Tabitha marveled at the most, was how bright it was. High above, streams of sunlight broke through the thick canopy leaves, orangey beams of pure sunlight, unfiltered by clouds or rain that inundated her life.

While Tabitha admired the wilderness around them, Luke pulled out the blanket she had been hiding under, along with their meal and drinks.

“It’s so beautiful. I’ve never seen something so untouched,” Tabitha commented, turning in place to take in the panoramic view of the forest.

“You’ve never been to one of the parks?” Luke asked as he handed Tabitha her drink while holding everything else between in his arms.

“No. Christians aren’t allowed in public places like parks. And I don’t pass one on my way to work.”

Tabitha’s face beamed with unbridled wonder as she looked to Luke. He was staring at her, eyes soft and limpid above a gentle smile that rolled across his perfect mouth.

“What is it?” she asked laughingly, taking her drink from him.

“Nothing… It’s just nice to see you smile. You have a great smile, you know that?” Luke motioned them towards a narrow path through between two trees. Tabitha followed.

Tabitha’s gaze couldn’t stay still as they carefully stepped their way through the underbrush. Luke pushed back low-lying branches so she could pass unhindered and occasionally pressed back a dense cluster of weeds that blocked her path. She was flattered by his gallantry, but another idea came to mind.

They were literally out in the middle of no where, outside of the city limits and she was far from help if she needed it. The natural cautionary side of her felt a twinge of worry, but even though she hadn’t known Luke for long, she felt he could be trusted. If he wasn’t, then at least she had a few happy memories to take with her to the work camp.

They soon emerged from the path and into a wide meadow. A breath caught in her throat as Tabitha’s eyes burned with tears at the beauty that lay before her. It was just like the meadow in the dreams she so often had. Sunlight washed over her and the warmth it gave was more than she ever imagined it to be. Her hand fled to her mouth and nose, trying vainly to smother the sobs that sent her body into mild convulsions.

Off to the side, Luke was preparing their picnic, spreading out the blanket and setting out their meal. He looked up and noticed the rising hysteria in her.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, fleeing to her side. He let his hand rest between her shoulder blades as she gained control of herself.

“It’s just…” she sniffled, “I’ve been here before.”

His eyes narrowed with confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Tabitha began, gesturing her hands pathetically as she continued to sputter a bit, “I haven’t exactly been right here in this very spot before, but I’ve had dreams about a place like this before. I’m sorry I’m getting so emotional. It’s just even more beautiful in person.”

Luke exhaled with relief and smiled. “It’s alright. Do you want to eat further out in the middle? It’s not like we’re going to be seen out here anyway.”

Tabitha nodded and watched as he went to slide their picnic farther away from the tree line and into the grassy field. He had to beat back the high stalks, but eventually he cleared a very cozy patch for them to sit in.

Having regained her composure, she joined him on the blanket. The sharp scent of the grass overpowered the smell of the food, but she relished in it. Luke unwrapped the food and handed her burger to her as he began devouring his own.

“So, why did you bring me out here?” Tabitha finally asked as she settled into her surroundings. She hadn’t even bitten into her food yet, but Luke was already halfway through his meal.

He swallowed a mouthful before looking up with striking blue eyes. The sunlight made them even more captivating. “I wanted to share a meal with you.”

Tabitha shook her head. “No, I mean, what’s the point of the meal?”

“To be fed of course.”

She gave him a look that told him to get serious and he chuckled.

“Ok, ok,” he said as she reclined back on his elbows, crackling the grass beneath him. Tabitha’s eyes roamed over his chiseled torso before returning to his face. She hoped that he would take the color in her cheeks as an effect of the sun and not the blush that it really was.

“Over the past month I have seen you nearly everyday at work and not once have we had a meaningful conversation or gotten to know each other. It’s been bothering me.” Luke laughed a bit and looked away. “I hope you won’t find this awkward, but I’ve been thinking about you a lot and I can’t seem to stop.”

Tabitha bowed her head in an attempt to conceal the radiant smile that she couldn’t contain. Now she knew they felt the same way for each other. Luke haunted her night and day, everywhere she went and no amount of work or scripture reading could block him out of her thoughts.

Luke’s gaze fell back to her. “So, I wanted to get you some place where we could talk and get to know each other. My original idea was to get a secluded table in a corner at a restaurant where we wouldn’t be stared at or noticed too much, but I think this actually worked out a lot better.”

“Yes, it did.” Tabitha ogled at the greasy burger and took a apprehensive bite. Her taste buds were overwhelmed by the riot of flavors. Tabitha’s eyes widened with shock. She had never tasted anything so delicious. The restaurant had fine food, but it was often cold and stale from being left out for too long. And the foods at home were no better. It was like a whole new world had opened up for her.

“You ok?” Luke asked.

Tabitha, her mouth still full, savoring the first bite, nodded her head and looked to him, eyes filled with excitement. “Yes,” she mumbled. “This is amazing.”

Luke fell onto his back, writhing with laughter.

Tabitha ignored him and took bite after bite, loving her first experience with fast food.       When Luke’s laugh died down, he watched her finish off the meal at a ravenous speed.

“You were hungry,” he commented, his voice laced with amusement.

Tabitha stuffed a few fries in her mouth and nodded.

“Have you even tried the soda yet?”

She had almost completely forgotten about it. She sipped it up through the straw and thought her mouth would explode with the shock of the carbonation. She wasn’t expecting it, but found it a refreshing chaser.

Luke let her finish the meal in silence and when she crumbled up the wrapper and dropped it to the blanket.

“Ok. Well, how should we start off then?” Tabitha asked, feeling the buzz of caffeine suddenly hit her system.

“How about… hobbies. What do you like to do in your free time?” There was a perkiness to Luke’s face as if he had been looking forward to this all week.

Tabitha’s lips tightened into a thin line, knowing full well what the answer was. She had no hobbies. There was nothing appealing about her home life. She wasn’t quite ready to tell him about her mother yet, but what else was there to tell? She didn’t want him to lose interest in her because she was boring, but she didn’t want to lie and puff herself up with images of going to parties that didn’t happen or talents that she didn’t possess.

“I don’t really have the convenience for hobbies. I get home from work and usually I’m so tired I just go straight to bed if I don’t have anything else to do like laundry, shopping or cleaning.”

Luke didn’t seem disappointed. The sun accentuated the blonde streaks in his hair, making his skin look even tanner than in the city, especially against the white glare of his button up shirt. “Then we have something in common. I don’t have any hobbies either.”

“Really?” Tabitha didn’t want to believe him. A Gadrian man had many priveleges. He could do anything he wanted, go anywhere, buy anything and no one had the right to tell him that he couldn’t. Why not use such a blessing?

“Yeah, really. I don’t have a lot of stuff and I’ve given up a lot of things I used to do in my hometown so there’s not much left for me.”

“What things did you give up?”

Luke’s face went sour as if reliving a painful memory and she instantly regretted asking.       “It’s things I can live without. I used to smoke and drink a lot. I was on the party scene a lot, but as I got older it became less enticing. It just wasn’t fun anymore.”

Although Tabitha couldn’t relate, she was thankful he was a changed man.

“I still drink on occasion with my dad, but not nearly as much as I used to.”

“You don’t look much older than I am,” Tabitha observed.

Luke seemed intrigued. “How old are you exactly?”

“Twenty-two.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “No way. You seem so much more mature than twenty-two.”

“Well, how old are you?”

“Twenty-seven.”

“You don’t look it,” Tabitha said with a smile. “You look much younger.”

“I guess we’re even then.”

Tabitha coiled her feet behind her and leaned against one hand, tilting her head against her shoulder, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. “But you must do something after work?” she asked, getting back to their original conversation.

Luke shrugged, lacing his fingers over his stomach. “Not really. My dad and brother are usually busy with their own things so I sit on the couch with them, but my mind is miles away when they’re talking to me.”

She wondered if his mind was on her in those moments like her mind was on him, but didn’t push that question. “Tell me about them?”

“Who? My dad and brother? There’s not too much to tell. My dad, as I’ve told you is the chief of police. He’s always been in the police force as long as I can remember. And I don’t think he’s part of the Gyad like you thought before. I think he’s just regular police. At least, that’s what I gather when he comes home and talks about work.”

“And your brother is a lawyer?” Tabitha recalled.

“Yep. He’s got his own law firm opening in Shiloh. He’s the brainiac of the family and has a lot more common with my dad than I do.”

“Then you must be close with your mother?”

Another shot of pain flashed in Luke and Tabitha wished she would stop hitting raw nerves. “My mom hasn’t been in the picture since I was little. Everyone gives me different stories. Dad said she committed suicide, my brother said she was killed, my family said she just ran out on us. I don’t know what is true and what isn’t. All I know is she’s not around.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Tabitha said softly, genuinely heartbroken for Luke. She knew what it was like to lose a family member. She knew all too well.

“What was your family like?” Luke asked, propping himself up onto his elbow.

She sighed and steeled herself for the story that would unfold.

“My dad worked for a construction company, as did my brother. They were good, honorable men. My father led us in bible studies every evening. My brother would help me with my academic studies and chores all the time and take care of me when our parents were working.

“My mom used to work for a seamstress in the city, helping make wedding dresses. She loved her work and made the loveliest dresses for me when I was little. Even if she had to make them out of flour or potatoes sacks, she always had a knack for making it pretty…”  Tabitha’s mind drifted off to the wonderful memories she shared with her family. She would have given anything to have them back with her now. “I can still remember they day that the police took them away… I miss them a lot.”

A single tear escaped down her cheek, a mournful sentiment to her late family. “But,” she continued, “I know I will see them again.” She felt herself smiling at the very thought of seeing her brother and father in heaven, standing with Jesus and all the angels. It would be a glorious day, indeed. No more crying, no more suffering. Just love and joy would reign in God’s majestic heavenly kingdom.

“You’ll see them again? Are they still alive?”

The look on Luke’s face was a mix of confusion and compassion.

Tabitha shook her head. “No, they’ve passed away, but when I pass away someday, I’ll see them in heaven.”

His eyes lit up with interest at the mention of heaven. Tabitha quickly added, “But I won’t go on about such things. It’s illegal to talk about and I’m sure you weren’t looking for preaching when you planned this meal.”

Luke couldn’t help but laugh. “No, I didn’t, but I wouldn’t mind hearing about it later if you’re willing to tell me.”

She grinned and nodded, eager to share her faith if he was open to it. “That sounds like a plan.”

A beat of silence passed between them before she continued their discussion.

“So, if you and your brother are old enough, why don’t you move out of your father’s home?” Tabitha knew that many Christian families stayed together in one home for as long as possible if they could help it. They needed each other for support and fellowship, but she knew Gadrians to not be that way at all.

“We’ve all gotten used to each other, I guess. We get along fine and it’s cheaper to live together. We’re just three bachelors, so it’s not complicated. My dad never dated anyone after mom. My brother hasn’t found the right girl that could put up with his busy lifestyle.    He’s a bit of a workaholic. And I…” Luke paused to think of the correct wording. “I guess I’m just waiting.”

“Waiting for what?” Tabitha had to ask before taking another sip of her soda. She wanted him to say something pertaining to her, but that would have been too perfect.

“For… that right motivation to take that leap of faith again, I guess.”

There was a far away glimmer in his eye as his gaze fell past her. She could see the brokenness, the scars that he tried to hide. Tabitha esteemed herself in being highly intuitive when it came to people. It was a gift she had since she was little. No matter how hard someone tried to hide a hurt, she could still see it in their mannerisms and especially in the eyes. The eyes always betrayed the person behind them.

Tabitha also picked up on the word again. Had he loved and lost so tragically to make him guard his heart? Even from her? She knew it was time to change the subject.

“I remember you said that you owned your own restaurant in Trezville. Have you always been interested in the food industry?”

Luke turned back to her, the shadow of apathy gone from his eyes. “I’m more interested in the management aspect of running a business. I seem to be good at it, so I’ve stuck with it all these years.”

“Do you get along well with Mark and Jack?” Tabitha asked, unsure of what spurred that question forward.

Luke snorted. “Are you kidding? I hate those guys. I barely tolerate Jack and do my best to stay on Mark’s good side, but they both just aggravate me in the end.”

Tabitha gave a soft laugh and tiled her head back. “I remember when you almost beat Jack up in the kitchen. Do you remember that day?”

“All too well,” Luke replied with a nod.

Tabitha sat up, incited by the heat of the memory. “I remember the room being so thick with tension that I was practically swimming in it. And the look in Jack’s eyes when you threatened him! I only wish I could inspire that kind of respect.”

Luke shook his head. “That wasn’t respect, it was fear.”

“Still, I wish I could stand up for myself like that so you didn’t have to.” Tabitha had the courage to do it. There were countless times when she wanted to give Mark a piece of her mind, but she kept herself on a leash to avoid trouble. If she only had the power, the authority that Luke had, things may have been easier for her. Is she weren’t a Christian life would all be easier.

“Well, anytime you want me to rough them up a bit, just let me know.” Luke pounded his fists together for emphasis and she giggled.

They smiled as a moment of silence fell between them. Tabitha tried her best to look at anything but Luke, while all he did was gaze at her with a longing that she was sure bordered upon an emotion forbidden to both of them.

Tabitha blushed a deep red and bit her lip. “So, what is this exactly?”

“What do you mean?” Luke’s expression never waivered.

“Is this a…” she could hardly bring herself to say it, “a date?” She had heard talks about these things at the restaurant. Inside the ghetto, it was known as courting, but she knew them to be the same.

Luke seemed a little surprised, but his smirk didn’t fade at the question. “I believe it would be,” Luke said coolly.

“You know this is wrong. We’re not even supposed to be here together,” she said meekly.

“Oh, come on now. You were just opening up and being yourself and you have to bring that up again?” Luke’s eyes rolled and he fell onto his back, disturbing the bed of grass again.

Tabitha leaned forward a little. “But you still know it’s wrong and yet we’re here anyway!”

Tabitha knew this fact could not be ignored or covered up by appetizing food and pleasant conversation. It was a real problem.

Luke turned his head and looked to her with pleading eyes.

“I know it’s wrong. I know this is illegal. I know we shouldn’t be here, doing this. But, aren’t you at least enjoying yourself? You must get lonely sometimes, too, late at night, staring out the window, wondering if you’ll ever have someone you can rely on for friendship? Aren’t you tired of not having anyone who understands? Someone to hold you at night when it gets cold or when you have a nightmare. Someone to be there when you’re crying and broken hearted that can mend that pain deep down where you won’t allow anyone else. Don’t you want someone like that in your life who is faithful enough not to run away?”

His words cut Tabitha deep. It was the very musings of her own soul, spoken aloud for the first time. Just the night before, she was gazing out the window at the darkened clouds, thinking about the one person that could chase away her loneliness. The one person she knew she would want in her life as a companion. The one person she knew she could trust above anyone else outside of the ghetto. And that person was sitting right in front of her. And glancing up into his eyes, she could see that the one person he wanted was in front of him as well. A million different emotions warred just beneath the surface for both of them and she could see it just as plainly as the sunshine around them.

She didn’t know how to answer his question. She only knew what she felt. But, what she felt was wrong. It was a sin. It was illegal. But he looked so broken, yearning for some response of agreement or sympathy. He longed for someone just as much as she did.

It made no sense, none of it made any sense. The sensible girl would not fall so hard and so quickly for someone she barely knew. But beyond everything, there was something about it that just felt right. But could it be possible that he had fallen so hard too? Or was he that desperate for companionship? He had his pick of women. Why her?

While she was deep in thought, she scarcely noticed that Luke was stirring from his resting place.

He sat up completely and leaned forward onto his hands and knees, coming so unnervingly close to Tabitha that she had no time to react.

His hand reached around the back of her neck to pull her closer to him, but she was quick enough to see where this was going. Tabitha reflexively pushed her hand against his muscular shoulder, stopping his progress. Her body trembled with anticipation and her stomach tightened. She couldn’t breathe as chills crept over her skin.

Their noses were almost touching and she could feel his hot breath on her face. Their gazes were locked, full of emotion. Fear, passion, longing and brokenness coursed between them.

Tabitha wanted so badly to drop her hand and let him do what he intended. Her fingers quivered on his chest, barely having the strength at all to keep it raised like that.

The only thing she could whisper was, “No.”

She felt like an imbecile for saying such a thing, but she had to say it. Her flesh wanted to say yes, but her spirit said no. She had to go with the one that she trusted more.

“What?” Luke whispered, sitting back slightly, looking even more puzzled and hurt.

“I can’t. I’m sorry. Please, don’t.”

Tabitha let her hand drop, hoping he wouldn’t make another advance. Luke only let his head hang as he sat back onto his heels. A sigh escaped him and she wished she could take it all back. Whatever pain he had deep inside, she didn’t want to make it worse.

“I’m sorry, I’m just not ready for that sort of thing.” She bit her lip and let her gaze fall down to the vacant space between them.

This was the moment where she could truly judge his character. Was this whole month a farce? A plot to get her alone and take advantage of her? Or was he sincere in his intentions towards her and respect her wishes? She wondered if he would still care for her, even if she didn’t give him the pleasure he wanted.

“I’m sorry for pushing like that. I didn’t mean to offend you. I just couldn’t help myself.”

Tabitha met his gaze and smiled. That was the answer she was looking for.

Luke ran his fingers through his hair, appearing to be in deep thought, struggling in a battle with his own conscious. Tabitha wanted to test him further.

“If you really can’t control yourself, you know that Alisha is always open for a relationship. I think she likes you,” Tabitha mumbled. She would never forget the way  Luke seemed to brush her off that first day at the restaurant. She’d see the way Alisha flirted with him over the last month too. Luke would have had to be blind not to notice.

A flash of anger came across his face. “I don’t give a rip about Alisha. She’s a slut and I wouldn’t go on a date with her even if she paid me.”

Tabitha had to bit her lips together to keep from giggling. She hated to admit it, but she agreed with him. Seeing her lightened mood, Luke softened as well.

“Then why can’t you help yourself?” Tabitha knew she was prodding at Pandora’s box, but she didn’t care. She was too curious.

Luke grinned. “Because, you’re beautiful, inside and out. It’s hard not to want to.”

Tabitha never heard anyone say those words to her. They were like a balm to her shattered self esteem. “Thank you. But, can we get to know each other a little better before that?”

He nodded in agreement and they settled back into the flow of conversation.

It was then that she realized that she was talking about kissing and romantic notions as casually as if it were something that was inevitable to happen between them. Who was to say that this was going to work out at all? For all she knew, tomorrow would be her last day in Shiloh before being dragged to a work camp for some silly reason. Or Luke could decide to find another job.

The idea of never seeing each other again constricted her lungs, but she tried to push the thoughts away. She didn’t know what the future held and neither did Luke. But, she took comfort in the idea that they would face it together, no matter what it was.

For more insights and the “Story Behind the Story” of Clouds, check out its Book Page. And stay tuned for the pre-order notice!

What Makes a Character?

So, this is something I was really struggling with on my last book (yes, I have three stories published and I’m still working on the craft). While writing “Clouds”, I was also reading “These Sheltering Walls” by Mary Jane Hathaway (which you totally need to read, by the way. It’s amazing!). But, while I was reading, I started noticing something about the way the characters are and compared them to Luke and Tabitha. The characters of Henry and Gideon were so believable, so deep and complex that I couldn’t help but be sucked into the story. I turn and look at my characters and I was like “Uhh.. something’s wrong”.

After that, I started doing some research about character development. Early in my writing career, I made what I called “Character Bios” for each of my main characters. This was something I carried over from my days of role playing on chat forums. It included the basics like name, hair color, eye color, ambitions, etc. I stopped doing that after a while because I thought I had a clear idea in my mind of who my characters were. But, I’m discovering that I need to return to this habit and develop it a little more.

There are many, MANY ways to develop a character and flesh them out. Below, I’m providing my comprehensive character bio sheet with explanation for each one.

Name: Duh, right? I know it may seem simple, but sometimes finding the right name can be challenging. Most of the time, I try to find a name that fits well with the character and the story, especially if it’s the protagonist. Since I deal with romances, I try to find a name that has a bit of a flair to it. If it’s a girl, the name must sound pretty and lilting off the tongue. I’m not going to name my heroine “Betty” or “Marge” (no offense to anyone with that name). Instead, her name could be “Annabelle”, “Katey” or “Samantha”. Also be careful that if you’re writing a historical novel to get the name right for the time period and location. A great tool I’ve use for the SCA persona creation and for names is “www.s-gabriel.org“.

Nickname: For example, in my novel “Clouds”, Tabitha is affectionately called “Tabby” by her mother and a few times by Luke. It can be an endearment nickname or something shorter. I gave the example “Samantha” earlier, but in the story she is more often called “Sam”. 

Age:

Parents: Only include this if it’s a predominate factor in the story. And if they aren’t, don’t develop names or their whole life history because it’s not important. The story is about your protagonist and their journey, not their parents’.

Siblings: The same goes for siblings ^^

Other Relatives: If your protagonist was raised by their grandparents or uncle, this is important. Or, if your protagonist had an inspirational aunt. Otherwise, just leave this category alone. 

Birthdate: Whether this is mentioned or not, this is important because of what follows below…

Time of birth: 

Western Astrological Symbol: This is why! Yes, it may be a bit extreme to delve into the astrological aspects of a person, but it will help you understand the character better, trust me. And you can do this backwards. If you want your character to be a Saggitarius, pick a birth date that falls in that time. A few times I’ve used this bio for a character, I picked the birth date and then when I’m doing the research for their signs, the traits have lined up with exactly how I imagined the character. Funny, huh? It can also give you a little help into how your character behaves in general if you’re having issues with that. 

Traits associated with:

Chinese Astrological Symbol:

Traits associated with:

Eyes: Don’t be afraid to get too specific with this. The more specific, the better the reader can envision your character.

Hair: Don’t just say “black” or “blonde”. Describe the length. Is it straight? Is it curly? Does it have a mind of it’s own? How does the character wear their hair? Do they treat it with anything? How might it look in the morning? These are all things to consider. 

Height: Yeah, this can get tricky. I’m liable to say “tall” or “short”, but it can be more complex than that. When you’re writing, you aren’t going to say your heroine is exactly 5 foot 5 inches. Instead, look for something to compare their height to. Can they reach the top cabinet easily or do they need a step stool? 

Physique: Skinny? Fat? Average? Buff? Big hips? No butt?

Ethnicity: White? Black? Native American? Asian? You’ve got a lot to pick from.

Family Descent: A person’s family descent can say a lot about their facial structure and temperament. I often just try to find a picture of someone my character resembles, but this can be a helpful tool still.

Righty or Lefty: Yes, this might be important. It can say a lot about a character. And if they are a lefty, imagine all the different things they have to do from where the sit at a table to how their desk is arranged. 

Distinguishing Marks: This can be tattoos, scars, piercings, anything that makes them stand out in a crowd. 

Sexual History: This might be a sensitive subject. Are they a virgin waiting for the right guy? Or a promiscuous brothel-hopper?

General Health: Are they well most of the time or do they have some aches and pains? 

Medical History: Did they break a leg falling out of a tree or have a dangerous fever once?

Allergies: Food or pollen?

Chronic Illnesses: Do they get a cold twice a year like clockwork?

Handicaps: When someone gets a bad injury as a child or young adult, it can affect their later years. Did they throw their shoulder out during a baseball game and it gets sore every once and a while?

Face Specs: This is where you can get specific about their facial features. 

Eyes: Narrow? Wide set? Deep set? Hooded? Google “Eye Shapes” and take a look at some examples. 

Face: Round face, square face, diamond face, triangle? Again, you can Google for help on this one. 

Lips: Full? Thin? Pale?

Voice: Does your heroine have a silvery, soft voice and your hero a husky deep voice? Specify that here.

Relationship status: Single? If so, are they looking or not? Or is it complicated? Think of this as like a Facebook relationship status update. 

Pets: Past or present. 

Friends: Everyone’s got friends, right? 

Enemies: Doesn’t have to be an arch nemesis like the Batman and Joker deal. Maybe they have that one cranky neighbor that steals their newspaper.

Beliefs: A character’s beliefs shape how they react to people and circumstances. Do NOT ignore this. 

Religion: This neither. Even if they don’t have a religion or they are atheist, this can give you a better idea of your character’s attitude. 

Superstitions: This kind of falls under the same category as “Beliefs”, but this takes it a step further. Do they believe in karma? How about angels and demons? Will they have a heart attack if a black cat appears? 

Diction/Accent: Where they are from and where they are now may dictate what you put here. If she’s from Alabama, she’s going to have a southern accent. If he’s from England or Australia, but has been living in the USA since he was a teenager, his accent may be a bit diluted. 

Highest Education: Did they go to college or drop out of high school?

Degrees: If it applies. 

Occupation: What’s their job or are they employed at all? 

Employment history: Did they have a job while going to school or is this their first job?

Salary: You can get technical with this and do some research for what a bookstore clerk would make on average in Arizona so you can get an idea what kind of restaurants they will eat out at. Obviously someone who gets paid minimum wage is not going to go out to eat at a fancy steakhouse every week. This can help shape what the daily life of your character is like. 

Status and Money: Lower class or high class? Do they blow their money as soon as they get it or do they have a methodical savings plan? 

Own or Rent: Self-explanitory, but you can give a little more detail as to where they are renting or what kind of neighborhood they live in. 

Living space: Are they a slob or neat-freak?

Work Space: Do they work in a comfortable office, a cramped cubicle or outside? 

Mode of Transportation: Do they walk to help the environment or drive a luxury sports car? 

Fears: What makes them quiver in their boots and their foreheads damp with sweat? 

Secrets: What are they hiding from the other characters in your story? 

IQ: No need to get specific with numbers. Are they pretty smart or are they missing a few marbles? 

Eating Habits: Do they eat like a bird or gorge themselves? Does your character have any eating disorders like anorexia? Do they only eat at certain times of the day? Or are they one of those weird people that don’t like their foods to touch on the plate? 

Favorite Food: What’s their guilty pleasure when it comes to cuisine? Do they treat themselves with chili cheese fries after a long day at work? 

Sleeping Habits: Insomniac or do they get a full eight hours? Plagued by nightmares or pleasant dreams about ponies and rainbows? 

Book Preference: If your character was in a bookstore, what section would they flee to? What kind of a book would they pull down from the shelves and read the back cover? 

Favorite type of music: Would they turn to a different station when country music comes through the speakers and keep it set to classical, or the other way around? 

Handwriting: Is it neat? Can you barely read it? Cursive or not? 

Preferred Style: Do they keep up with the latest fashions or do they create their own style? 

Groups or Alone:

Leader or Follower:

Planner or Spontaneous:

Journal Entry?: Do they keep a journal? If so, do they keep up with it pretty regularly? What would a normal entry look like? 

Hobbies/Recreation: What do they do in their spare time when they aren’t catering to the whims of the author? 

How do they relax?: Bubble bath? Candles? Long walks in the moonlight? Music? 

What excites them?: What gets their heart racing and makes them happy to be alive? 

Pet Peeve: What is their equivalent to nails on a chalkboard? Be creative here. 

Attitudes: How do they act most of the time? Are they placid or bubbly? Grumpy or mellow? 

Stressors: Almost the same as pet peeves, but this is a little deeper. Finances can stress people out. Their job, relationships, or inner conflicts that no one sees on the surface. 

Obsessions: Is there anything your character just can’t live without? A better word for this part may be “Passions”. 

Addictions: Love sugar a bit too much? Need to light up one more cigarette? 

Ambitions: What do they strive for in life? Most people do not live day to day just to survive. They’re working towards a goal. Do they climb the social ladder or the corporate one? Do they dream of owning their own restaurant? Maybe they want to start an organization to help kids in Africa get cleaner water? Or are they simply working towards a comfortable living? Everyone has dreams. What is your character’s?

As seen by others: How do the other characters in the world you created see your protagonist? 

As seen by self: When your character looks in the mirror, do they see someone they are happy with or do they harbor a deep self loathing? Why? 

Objects Kept In: This is fun! Go down this list and think about everything you just listed for this character in the bio. Based off of that and what you interrpret about your character, what would they keep in the following places. This can really say a lot about the character. 

Purse:

Wallet:

Fridge:

Medicine Cabinet:

Glove Compartment:

Junk Drawer:

Kitchen Cabinets:

Closets:

Backpack:

Locker:

Desk:

Clothes Pockets:

Halloween Costumes: Did they even celebrate Halloween growing up? If they did, what did they dress as? What was their favorite costume? 

Tricks: Can they balance a switchblade on their finger? Can their mount a horse while it’s at full gallop?

Talents: What can they do that is special and makes them stand out in a crowd? Can they cook an amazing apple pie or design a workable electric engine in their head? 

Politics: Conservative or Liberal? You can get a detailed as you want with this if it’s important to your story line. 

Drugs/Alcohol: Do they like a little merlot every once and a while or do they take shots of whiskey? Did they ever experiment with drugs in college? 

Passwords: As you probably well know, a password often reflects your own personal interests because it has to be something that you’ll remember easily. You don’t have to get specific with this. 

Email address: Just as for passwords, the same goes for email addresses. 

Prized Possessions: Do they covet a crinkled and dogeared family photo or a tattered stuffed doll from childhood? 

Special Places: Where does your character go to escape from the real world? It can be a physical place or one inside their own minds. 

Special memories: Does your character pull up this memory when they need something to smile about? 

Strengths: What is their strong suit? This is different from “Talents”. Someone may have a strength in logistics and numbers. Someone may be strong with the ability to face social confrontations. 

Weakness: What makes them crumble and become utterly useless? Seeing a child cry? Hearing their name sullied by someone they care about? 

Tragic Quality: I don’t know about you, but I can’t get emotionally attached to a character unless they have some sort of tragic flaw in them. Do they have amnesia? Are they the bastard child of a famous actress and no one knows it? Have they been in prison for fifteen years for a crime they didn’t commit? 

Motivation: Your character is not going to stay the same throughout the story. They will change. If they don’t, you wrote a crappy story. I like to distinguish it as what their motivation in life is in three parts; beginning, middle and end. 

At Beginning of Story:

           – At the beginning of the story, what is going on with them? Are they battling depression? Is everything going right? 

– Wants: At this point, what do they want from life? Peace? Happiness? Escape? Love? 

In Middle of Story:

            – After your character has had time to interact with others and deal with the conflicts you’ve thrown at them, what’s going on now? If they were battling depression before, is it still there? Are they finding a way of coping with it? Are they worse off than they were before or better? This point takes place close to the climax, but not just yet. 

– Wants:

Towards the End of Story:

            – Right at the climax or just before, what’s going on with them? Are they totally confused by what’s going on around them? Are they finding closure to a part of their life that they rejected? 

– Wants:

20 Things:

Once you have established everything above, think about what else there is about this character that makes them special or develops them. These twenty things can be simple details like how they like their coffee to complex life events that have shaped their behavior. Sometimes these things don’t even have to be mentioned in the story itself. They simply exist to give you a better understanding of who your character is. 

I hope this guide gives you a little better of an idea on how to develop your character. If you have any suggestions or other ideas, feel free to comment below. I’m always open to hearing how other writers flesh out their characters.

My drives…

Others drown their sorrows in drinks

I ditch mind on the blacktop

I’ve got gas and rubber to burn

And miles to shred beneath me

I pick 85, north or south

Or 90, east or west

And I ride until the pain goes away

I drive faster than my racing thoughts

Just to try and clear my head

I let passion and emotion pour from my soul

Spilling from my mouth and over the steering wheel

Singing louder than the voices

Of fear and doubt that ride shotgun

They like to backseat drive

But I don’t push those limits

And I keep it between the lines

AC’s up on full blast

To freeze the tears streaming down my cheeks

The headlights blaze the trail before me

They shine into the dark fog of my future

I may not know where I’m going

But I know what I’m leaving behind

When I feel half way sane again

I make that sharp U-turn to head back

Slinging my troubles off the hood

Like a box of rotting trash

I lose so much on that ride

But when I pull back into home

I know I’ve found much more

This is love…

Have you ever had your soul touched by bliss, kissed my another soul with peace?

It’s such a subtle and inexplicable sensation that you don’t even know it happened until you’re painfully aware of their absence.

It leaves you bare and empty, as if a numbness has consumed you and it’s impossible to feel anything else by the aching that remains.

You look around and wonder what happened.

The world stays stagnant, but you see it through different eyes that aren’t your own.

Colors are bland, taste seems like a fading memory, and everything sounds distant and out of reach.

You feel disconnected, detached from the world and the joy that it could bring.

No, joy is a fleeting thing now that they aren’t there by your side.

But, oh, when you hear their voice from across the room, your heart beats again.

Their face comes into view and its as if the world is alive again.

You’re alive again.

And things are as they should be.

Your lips twitch into a smile for the first time in what seems like an eternity, like it’s something you’ve never done before and can’t stop no matter how hard you try.

And your soul is whole again.

With one word they can shine light into the darkened corners of your being.

One touch pours kerosene into your blood.

One long gaze, one kiss, can strike the match and set you ablaze.

Their nearness kindles the fire inside, burning hot beneath your skin.

It’s a pleasant burn, one you wouldn’t trade for all the riches of the world.

To feel their arms around you, holding you close, you can feel their own fire raging inside.

You feel their heart thump in time with yours.

And for a moment, the world is still and quiet.

Nothing exists but the two of you and the storm of passion you stand in.

It engulfs you both, wanting to blow you away.

But they are your rock, your gravity, your reason for breathing.

This is love.

“The Neustrian Chronicles: Volume 1” Now Available On Amazon Kindle!

A novella that follows the life of two young people born in the 8th century Frankish Kingdom. Baldmund Martel, the son of a wealthy merchant family from Cologne finds himself the sole survivor of a family feud and hiding from his relatives in the city of Reims as an armorer’s apprentice. Adallinda is the privileged daughter of a count, but her childhood is torn apart by the sudden death of her beloved mother and must learn how to grow into a proper lady amongst her five older brothers. Fate brought them together, but war and duty tore them apart. Now reunited five years later, can their love survive?

For more insight and “The Story Behind the Story”, check out its page at “The Nuestrian Chronicles” Page

Available on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited!

“The Neustrian Chronicles: Volume 1″ Now Available On Amazon Kindle!

A novella that follows the life of two young people born in the 8th century Frankish Kingdom. Baldmund Martel, the son of a wealthy merchant family from Cologne finds himself the sole survivor of a family feud and hiding from his relatives in the city of Reims as an armorer’s apprentice. Adallinda is the privileged daughter of a count, but her childhood is torn apart by the sudden death of her beloved mother and must learn how to grow into a proper lady amongst her five older brothers. Fate brought them together, but war and duty tore them apart. Now reunited five years later, can their love survive?

For more insight and “The Story Behind the Story”, check out its page at “The Nuestrian Chronicles” Page

Available on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited!

Don’t you hate when you’re a writer and….

These are just some musings of mine as an writer and avid reader that perhaps someone out there can relate to.

Don’t you hate when you’re a writer and…

1.) … you feel like writing, but you’re totally drained.

I often try to set a goal for myself with writing. Just as a self-employed person has to set themselves on a daily schedule, I think that writers should do the same. I’ve heard different options from setting a word count goal or page goal, but I like to set a chapter goal. Especially if I’m going through and editing a previous work like I am right now with “Clouds”. I did the same thing with “Escape”, setting a goal for one chapter a day getting fully revised and edited. However, I didn’t factor into the fact that “Clouds” was written a year before “Escape” and is exponentially worse. I’ve had to do an overhaul on every chapter so far. Anyway, but because of that, the chapter isn’t taking me only a few hours to go through. It’s taking me several hours (if not days) instead and I haven’t met my chapter goal once in this entire process. It’s frustrating, but it means I’ve gotten a lot of writing done. This happened a lot in my early years too.

What happens when I write too much and sort of binge on it, is that I get weary. Mentally, I’m all there to write and I have the motivation to, but the words are just not coming out the right way or I get burned out very quickly. As a result, a chapter will go from being so eloquently worded that it’s like gold, to sentences that don’t make sense or descriptions that don’t evoke the right emotion for the scene.

What I do to help this is to just take a step back and take a break for a day or two, or however long it takes to get those juicy words oozing out again. It can be hard, especially if writing is how you stay sane (like me) but don’t go burning down the world. If you get to that point, sit your butt down and write (for everyone’s sake!).

2.) … you’re reading someone else’s work and see flaws. 

This is not to say that you don’t like what you’re reading. I just got done reading “The Pepper in the Gumbo” by Mary Jane Hathaway and I adored it! She is a professional and successful author with many books published and years of experience to back her up, along with editors to catch mistakes. But, I guess I caught what they couldn’t. More specifically, I saw words missing. I still understood the sentence from the context, but it was like nails on a chalkboard at times. There’s really no way to fix this except to be forgiving. No author will be perfect. I know I’m not. Reading “The Princess and Her Rogue” made me embarrassed because I’m going through another editing round with it and I’m finding little mistakes that I can’t believe I missed before.

3.) … you’re reading someone else’s work and see ways for YOU to improve. 

And of course, the flip side to #2 is that you can be reading and learn a new way to describe something. Just the simple way the author writes a character’s smile or an action, or even an emotion they have and you have that moment of “OMG! I totally see it and relate!”. When this happens, I want to remember it for when I’m writing next and look for a chance to use it. I don’t see that as plagiarism. You’re learning through another author’s style and there’s nothing wrong with that. Plus, all the good writers say that you have to be an avid reader first before you can even be expected to write something halfway decent.

I’m discovering that fact to be painfully true. When I wrote my first three novels, I didn’t read that much. I was so dedicated to writing that I didn’t have time to read between that, work and school. I took 3 years off from writing and during that time, I must have read over 50 books total and all of them were amazing. Then, when I came back to writing I was editing through “Enigma” (not the be confused with “Escape”. This one isn’t published yet.) and I could not believe how horrible my writing style was. It didn’t make any sense, there was little to no emotion, inconsistencies all over the place and character interactions were artificial, very shallow. I was appalled and irritated with myself. But, now I know better and so my 3 year hiatus was a blessing instead of a trial. It gave me time to learn what real writing was.

4.) … you’re in the middle of planning a novel and get an idea for another. 

I’ve lost count of the number of times I have been in the middle of planning out a novel and I see or hear something that inspires an entirely new story. Just to name a few without giving away too many spoilers (because you’ll have no idea what I’m talking about): For “Moonstruck”, it was inspired by a song by Leanne Rimes called “Something’s Gotta Give” and driving through a small town in Alabama. “Caged” of my Vigilante series was inspired by watching the trailer for Mad Max when he’s got a muzzle over his mouth. “Moon Lullabies” was inspired by the song “Lullabies” by Nickleback. “Commitments” was inspired by seeing a couple walking down the sidewalk with a baby in a stroller. “Ghosts of the Moon” was inspired by watching a documentary about the British estate where they filmed the TV show Downton Abbey. Anything and I mean anything can inspire a story if you let your imagination have free reign in your life.

It can get frustrating though. I have over 60 novels planned and ready to write because of all these little seeds of inspiration, but I’m still working on quite a few more that I’m stumped on and I’ve got pre-writers block. I’m at a part in the plot that I just don’t know where to go from there. Or I’ve got a beginning and an ending, but no middle. One story I totally trashed because I heard a country song that inspired a story, but it was so short and shallow that after months of having it sit on my hard drive, still in the planning stage, I discovered that my heart just wasn’t in it anymore. So far, that’s only happened once. I don’t regret it, but I hope I don’t have to do it again. I hate dead ends.

And then on the other hand, it can be a blessing because if you’re stumped on a plot and get that little spark of imagination from something else, if you work really hard, you can integrate it into your current story and fill in a lot of gaps. I’ve done this several times and it takes a huge weight off my shoulders when I can finally mark that story as finished for the planning stage and go on to the next.

5.) … people ask if you had anything published yet. 

I am mostly speaking from my experiences before publishing. If you’re a writer and haven’t published yet, maybe you can relate. While in a conversation with a person, you bring up the fact that you’re a writer and have a book published, or a few books, or just a lot of ideas, and then the person asks the predictable question “Do you have anything published yet?” And you sheepishly reply “Well, no, but I’m getting there.” This is how I gained the courage to step up and get something published.

We were out to lunch with a few friends and the lady I was with knew I was a writer and that I had 4 novels and a short story sitting at home collecting dust. She asked me (for what seemed the millionth time I’ve heard it) if I had published. I told her I hadn’t and it really made me think about if I ever would be published. I always put it off because I didn’t want the rejection letters. With low self esteem already, I couldn’t emotionally handle it. But she mentioned self-publishing and I was curious. After doing a little research, I realized it was easy, free and the only part was that I had to do my own footwork, which I was pretty ok with. That night I went on Amazon Kindle and published “The Princess and Her Rogue”. It was scary, but I did it. The question, however embarrassing, spurred me to action.

But for those who it does not instill a sense that they need to get off their rears and take a risk, it can be difficult to hear. It’s a reminder to them that they haven’t really done anything great. Sure, they wrote a book, but they don’t know if it’s any good if they haven’t shared it with the world. If they’re anything like I used to be, they want to keep their novels to themselves for them to enjoy alone. It’s safer that way and you’re the only critic or fan. That’s not the purpose of writing a book. If it’s a fiction novel, you wrote it to entertain. If it’s non-fiction, you wrote it to edify or enlighten. If these motives were for yourself to enjoy or be edified with, then you’re being selfish. Want to avoid the awkwardness of this question? Get published and be proud that you accomplished something. That way when someone asks that question of you again, you can give them a credible answer.

Sneak Peak into my upcoming Christian romance novel, “Clouds”

Here is an excerpt from my Christian romance novel, “Clouds”. For more information on the background of the story, see “Clouds” book page. This is the unedited cut, so if there are any typos, please forgive them.

Later, just when the lunch rush began to dwindle down, Tabitha was in the kitchen and about to head back out to the dining area to check if any tables needed cleaning when suddenly she tripped. She had been so immersed in her own thoughts that she hardly noticed the leg that extended out in her path at the last minute.

Tabitha fell forward and whimpered as her elbow broke her fall against the ceramic tile. She rolled over and saw that the foot belonged to one of her coworkers who was coolly cleaning some dishes at the sink. He turned and laughed at her with no remorse or sympathy.

She sighed and tried to get back up. But, as she did, another foot came flying up and hit her in her stomach from out of nowhere, knocking the wind clean out of her. She grunted and fell back to the floor.

When she turned her eyes up to look at her new attacker, she saw it was Jack, one of the servers. Jack may not have been as bad as Mark, but he was a close second. Apart from minor scrapes and bruises that she received at her job, Jack was the one that caused the most bodily harm to her. And he always got away with it.

Jack was tall and lanky, with hardly any muscle to speak of but he could move fast and dish out a blow harder than Mark did. Tabitha was convinced that pure hatred and malice was behind every kick, every punch she got from him and that’s what made it hurt so much more. His cold eyes never looked upon her with favor, only a malevolent scorn that made her blood turn to ice in her veins.

He was the best server the restaurant had, always clean cut and professional with his brown hair cropped short. He was the hero of all the guys and the favorite amongst ladies – so he claimed anyway.

Jack and the coworker that tripped her were both laughing now, barking out insults that Tabitha had learned to tune out long ago. What she couldn’t ignore was Jack’s spit in her eye.

She rubbed away the saliva and tried to get up again, but Jack’s foot swung again and hit her in the spine. Tabitha cried out in pain and stayed on the floor a little longer, enduring more of their slurs. She caught the words “whore”, “scum”, “fool” and “vermin” amongst their abuses. By now a small crowd had formed in the kitchen, congesting the flow of traffic for the servers and cooks. But no one wanted to miss the chance to watch the Christian be ridiculed.

Tears breached her eyelids and flowed freely down her face. She wanted to fight back, yell at them, but she knew she couldn’t. A work camp wasn’t worth a reprisal. She simply had to suffer through it.

Tabitha bit her lip and pushed herself up onto her knees, even though both her elbow and her back ached badly. Her heart may have gotten used to the beatings, but her body couldn’t.

Jack wasn’t done with her. He slammed his boot into her lower back and pinned her down onto her stomach, digging his heal into the tiny bones of her spine. She wailed softly at the excruciating pain. If he applied more pressure, she was sure he would break something.

“Jack, let me go, please?” she pleaded breathlessly, her voice shrill from the pain.

“Oh, no. Not until you say something,” Jack mocked as he crouched down over her, putting even more pressure on her back. “Say I’m a sinner.”

Tabitha knew better than to call a Gadrian by any name, especially that one.

“Jack, please let me go?” she repeated urgently, feeling something snap.

“Say I’m a sinner and I’ll let you up.”

Tabitha squeezed her eyes shut and prayed for a rescue. Jack’s body shifted a little and she felt more snapping in her back. She winced and whimpered, but she refused to open her mouth. She knew he wouldn’t let her up, it was just a trick to give him more reason to hurt her.

Just then, the kitchen door from behind them opened.

“Jack! Get off of her!” a strong voice boomed, the whole kitchen trembled at the sound of it and rang in her ears sharply. She knew exactly who the voice belonged to.

Jack immediately hopped off of Tabitha. She was relieved to have his heavy boot off of her, but she wondered if she could even move to safety. Every motion shot pain through her hips and back, but she pushed through until she was on her hands and knees.

“Jack, if I see you pull a stunt like that again, I’ll report you to Mark for assault against a fellow employee. The same goes for you, Ken.”

“She’s just a Christian,” Jack argued with a shrug of his shoulders.

Tabitha looked up to see the angry fire that blazed in Luke’s eyes and the smug grin on Jack’s face.

He grabbed Jack by the collar of his uniform and slammed him against a tall cabinet with such force that even Tabitha jumped a little. Jack’s feet dangled inches above the ground with only Luke’s tight grip on his shirt to keep him from falling.

She hated to admit it, but the fearful glint in Jack’s eyes was gratifying.

“She’s not a rag doll to be thrown around. She’s indispensible to this company and if she isn’t able to work because you broke her back, then you are held liable. I repeat, if I see you harassing her again, I’ll see to it personally that you’re fired and you won’t work in any restaurant in this town again. Am I understood?” Luke growled, a fervor that exuded from him that commanded respect, even from Jack.

Jack made a sour face and nodded.

Luke pushed Jack against the cabinet once more and dropped him. “Now, get back to work, all of you!” he addressed the audience that were watching his slightly unethical disciplinary tactic.

They all quickly turned and went back to whatever it was they were doing before the fight broke out. Tabitha stared wide-eyed at her defender. No one had ever stood up for her like that. No one had ever told Jack off either. Luke was certainly a gentleman, untouched by the cruel society that surrounded him. It was just unimaginable that he could be so perfect.

He stood still for a moment, making sure that everyone had moved on from the scene before turning to Tabitha. He bent down and gingerly helped her to her feet. “Are you alright?” he asked in a tender whisper.

Tabitha nodded, half dazed as he escorted her out of the kitchen and down a corridor that led to the manager offices. He led her into his private office. In the middle of the small room sat a tidy wooden desk with a chair pushed up underneath it and a few cabinets that were lined up against the far wall. Some inspirational posters were tapped up onto the wall, but other than that, the office was pretty bland and colorless.

He loosened his grip upon her arm and guided her into his chair. The effort to sit down was agonizing, but she managed to do it without anymore crying. She didn’t like the idea of crying in front of Luke, or anyone else. She may have been weak, but she didn’t want anyone to know it so plainly.

Luke opened his drawer and pulled out a water bottle for her. “Here,” he said, “take a break for a while. Are you sure you’re ok?”

Tabitha took the bottle and cracked it open to take a sip. “Yeah, I’ll be alright. I’m more shaken than anything.”

“Has he done this before?” Luke’s eyes drew down over his eyes, shadowing them in the bright florescent light.

“Not this exactly.”

“But he’s hurt you before?”

As much as Tabitha wanted Luke to exact revenge on Jack for her sake, she knew it wasn’t right. “Only a few times,” she fibbed.

Luke sighed heavily and folded his arms over his chest as if to keep in the rage.

After taking a long swig of the water, Tabitha looked up to him. “You know you could get arrested for helping me like.”

“Yeah, so?” Luke replied with a roll of his powerful shoulders.

“Don’t you care that you could get in trouble for standing up for me?”

“Not really. I know I did the right thing.”

“No, it wasn’t the right thing. It was a foolish thing to do. Why did you do it?” Tabitha knew she was speaking out of turn again, but her and Luke now had the kind of connection that made it only a little acceptable.

“Because I refuse to put up with that kind of rude behavior in this restaurant. I don’t care how Mark runs this place, but I want all my employees to feel safe while they work.”

“Everyone else is safe, besides me.” A shadow passed over Tabitha’s face at those words. They both knew it was the truth.

“Well, then I’m going to work to keep it safe for you.”

Luke seemed so calm, so collected and at ease that she wanted to scream at him. She didn’t care if she was arrested, but she cared if he was. Tabitha could never live with herself if she knew that it was all her fault that Luke was behind bars for simply helping her.

“Take all the time you need,” Luke said as he sauntered towards the office door. “There’s a bottle of pain pills in the top right drawer if you think you’ll need them.” He turned to face with his hand on the doorknob.

Tabitha’s gaze swept over him and she felt her stomach tighten once more. Luke was the whole package; kind, compassionate, strong and handsome. If only it were the eyes of a Christian that gazed back at her with such feeling and warmth.

“If I were in charge, I’d have you sent home to recover, but that’s not my call. I wish it were. Just take all the time you need and I’ll cover for you.”

Without another word, he opened the door and disappeared back into the hall.