Evil Editor's Blog, page 372

Cartoon 549

Caption: Angie

Your caption on the next cartoon! Link in sidebar.

Face-Lift 715

Guess the Plot

Daughter of the Ocean

1. Moira's always wondered who her biological parents were. She finally meets her mom, but when she asks about meeting her father, Mom just says, "Head for the coast; you can't miss him."

2. She claims to be a mermaid and although most people would be skeptical because she uses a submarine instead of swimming, crewman Digby believes it and lets her aboard the Sea Guppy. Hilarity ensues.

3. Just as Octavius the shepherd perfects the art of walking on water, the...

Book Chat Reminder

We'll discuss the December book, Black Hole, on Tuesday, January 5th, 6 PM eastern. If you can't make it, but have comments, send them on and I'll see they get into the discussion.








The January book is The Gentling Box, winner of last year's Bram Stoker Award for best first novel in the horror genre.
The author hopes to join us.


There's a link in the sidebar to the full chat schedule.

Cartoon 548

Caption: John

Your caption on the next cartoon! Link in sidebar.

Success Story

Dear Evil Editor,

I wanted to begin 2010 by offering my sincere thanks for your advice. I submitted my query letter to you in April of 2007 (Face-Lift 320). As a result of your suggestions (and those made by your minions) I received offers of representation from three agents. I have now sold four young adult novels! The first book, Tagged, will be published on March 1, 2010 by Harlequin Teen. The second, Past Midnight, will be published on September 1, 2010, and books three and four...

Writing Exercise Results . . .

. . . are in the posts below. The task was to write a scene that results in your making a New Year's resolution.

New Year's Resolution 7

I crawled from the pod, electrodes knotted round my seared naked flesh like string on a flashy bottle of sherry. Pain like I'd never known consumed me — pain I didn't want, never wanted. Pain that nobody would ever want, and if they did, wouldn't like when they got it.

Flames licked at my heels, fumes swam in the smoke, and my inflatable Evil Editor mobile popped overhead as if the man himself had been lanced by an overeager knight transported from Camelot by a time machine while battling a fe...

New Year's Resolution 6

Wood realizes her mistake too late. She stares at the screen in disbelief.

"I did NOT just hit send to submit!"

A blond avatar, beautiful in party gear of tie dye wrap with various accessories that cost big Linden loot, puts her hands to her hips. "You so did. BTW I'm not enjoying this party in SL. Send me someplace warm."

Wood ignores Ms. Perfect on the screen. "Two days left before school and I can't even read the whole frigging prompt! I'm as lame as my students on test days." She holds the b...

New Year's Resolution 5

It's my mother's fault. She won't move with the times - refuses to go digital at all, in any way. She's keen on photography, but won't touch a digital camera.

I'm not good with them myself, really - I've got a camera in my mobile phone; who hasn't? (Besides my mother, that is.) I can take basic pictures - nothing special, but they turn out OK.

Trouble is, my mother wants to see them. I can't email them to her - I can show her them on my laptop, but she always moans about not having a hard copy....

New Year's Resolution 4

New Year's Creepiest Resolution

"You did good. That college kid believed everything." Max held a big dog on a leash. His eyes gleamed with evil.

"Bastard, give me my son." Sullivan stepped toward Max who yanked the leash hard. The dog whined.

"Me oh my, cursing like that. I'm so offended. I might just sell this dog. There's this city slicker that wants a pet but I'd have to neuter him. Now you wouldn't want me to do that? He's such a good doggie with big balls." Max concentrated hate-filled thou...