Fakers Quotes

“Brooks, do you need me to explain how printers work? ’Cause twerking isn’t usually required”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“There are moments in our lives that define us. Moments where we have to make a choice that will change the path of our future. They come upon us suddenly, don’t they?” I thought about my decision to move with Ava or stay in California. “Yes, sir,” I said weakly. “How do you know when you’re making the right decision?” “Well, son, I should probably tell you to follow your heart. But in my case, I followed my dick, and it hasn’t steered me wrong yet.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“Wait, so now she turns the gay ones straight?” Amos Nutter demanded wonderingly. “Well, I’ll be damned.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“And now, by failing to give your boyfriend the love he so desperately craved,” my mother continued, undeterred, “you’ve driven him into Ava’s arms!” “Yeah!” Mal agreed. He paused and frowned, then shrugged like facts had ceased to be important. “What your mom said!” I scowled down at him. “What the hell are you talking about? You know better!” I waved a hand in Paul’s direction. “Tell them, Paul!” “I mean, it’s true that Brooks was never very emotionally available to me,” Paul said sadly.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“He’s my best friend, and he came here to provide moral support. But Mal’s… gay.” “Gay! Oh, dear Lord, she done turned another one.” Amos Nutter shook his head and made a tsking noise.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“How do you know when you’re making the right decision?” “Well, son, I should probably tell you to follow your heart. But in my case, I followed my dick, and it hasn’t steered me wrong yet.” I stared at him in shock for a few beats until the corner of his mouth curved up the tiniest bit. “Malachi, if you weren’t expecting a dick joke from a man named Red Johnson…” His eyes twinkled in the moonlight. “Then maybe you don’t belong here in Licking Thicket after all.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“No, Daddy!” Ava said. “Mal’s not the father.” “Wait, he’s not?” Mrs. Ivey demanded. “No.” Ava exhaled sharply. “He’s my best friend, and he came here to provide moral support. But Mal’s… gay.” “Gay! Oh, dear Lord, she done turned another one.” Amos Nutter shook his head and made a tsking noise.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“It was a sign of the seriousness of this that she ignored my language. “You know your daddy’s Head Licker on the Lickin’ Committee, and has been since Pop-pop stepped down thirty years ago. A Johnson’s been Head Licker for as long as there’s been a Johnson in the Thicket.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“And it’s not just any Lickin’, Brooks. This is the Great Centennial Lickin’.”
― Lucy Lennox, Fakers

“It’s time for the Great Lickin’ Festival,” she said unnecessarily, “to celebrate our glorious agricultural heritage.” She sighed again. “And I don’t need to tell you how excited your daddy and the other men in the Thicket get at Lickin’ time.”
― Lucy lennox, Fakers