Bayou Moon Quotes

“The judge's massive eyebrows crept up. "Kaldar. Are you the one speaking for the plaintiff today?"
"Yes, Your Honor."
"Well, shit," Dobe said. "I guess you're familiar with the law. You hit it over the head, set its house on fire, and got its sister pregnant.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“William leaned forward and pointed at the river. “I don’t know why you rolled in spaghetti sauce,” he said in a confidential voice. “I don’t really care. But that water over there won’t hurt you. Try washing it off.”
She stuck her tongue out.
“Maybe after you’re clean,” he said.
Her eyes widened. She stared at him for a long moment. A little crazy spark lit up in her dark irises.
She raised her finger, licked it, and rubbed some dirt off her forehead.
Now what?
The girl showed him her stained finger and reached toward him slowly, aiming for his face.
“No,” William said. “Bad hobo.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Cerise ran through the course in her mind. “Three miles, stream on the right, Mozer Lake, Tinybear, Bigbear, Miller’s Path.” She paused, not sure if she’d said it correctly. “Three miles, stream on the right, Mozer Lake, Tinybear, Bigbear, Miller’s Path.”
“Thank you, Dora. Put the sword back into Backpack and we’ll go.” He nodded at the river.
“Who is Dora?”
“You are. Dora the Explorer. Vamanos. Put the sword away or I will take it from you.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“That had to be the craziest thing he'd heard. At some point they must've looked around and said, "Hey, what do we have a shitload of?"
"Mud! It's cold and wet. I know, let's burn it!"
"Well, it ain't good for nothing else."
What the hell? He supposed if fish could have legs, then mud could burn. Spider or nor spider, if their cats started flying, he would be out of here like a rocket.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Fuck easy, Ceri. If you love him, fight for him. Nothing worth keeping is free in this world.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“My youngest brother killed a lynx yesterday,” Rose said.
“Apparently it came into his territory and left some spray marks. He skinned it, smeared himself in its blood, and put its pelt on his shoulders like a cape. And that’s how he came dressed for breakfast.”
Cerise drank some beer. “My sister kills small animals and hangs their
corpses on a tree, because she thinks she is a monster and she’s convinced
we’ll eventually banish her from the house. They’re her rations. Just in case.”
Rose blinked. “I see. I think we’re going to get along just fine, don’t you?”
“I think so, yes.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Is there anything else you need to tell me?”
Every time I look at you, I have to put a leash on myself. “No.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Why couldn't she have gotten another Edger or some dimwit from the Broken for a passenger? No, she got Lord Leather Pants here.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Cough clenched, and vomited something chunky into the grass.
Terrific.
The big dog sat on his haunches and looked at William with a perplexed expression on his face.
"Well, eat it back up," William hissed. "Don't waste it."
Cough gave a tiny whine.
"I'm not eating your puke."
Cough panted at him.
"No.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“How is it different?"
He rolled his head back, sable hair falling down on his shoulders. "With Rose I knew what to say. I could take a step back and talk to her. I remembered all the crap from the magaznies. It was easy."
"And with me, it's hard?" Why? Because she was a swamp girl? And how did the magazines fit into it?
William looked away from her. "I don't like it when you're away. If I don't see you, I can't settle down. If I see you talking with another man, I want to claw his throat out. And none of the things you're supposed to say fit."
Oh, this had to be good. "What sort of things?"
He sighed. "The lines. Like, 'You're my everything,' or 'Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“You call that evening the odds? You demolished them."
Demolished. He liked that. "I left you one."
"I noticed."
"I promised to share," he told her. "Manners are very important in the Weird. Lying would be quite impolite.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“It could be worse," he said finally. "Efrenia married an arsonist. Jake's wife is a kleptomaniac. I suppose, a psychopathic spree killer isn't that odd of a choice, considering.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Oh, Gods."
His eyes shone with want and predatory satisfaction. "The name's William. It's a common mistake.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Some women waited for a night in shining armor. She, apparently, had ended up with a knight in black jeans and leather, who wanted to chase her down and have his evil way with her.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“It depends. If I don't let you in, will you huff and puff and blow my house down?"
She had no idea. "I'm more of a kick the door open and cut everyone inside to ribbons kind of wolf.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Every handsome man had a flaw. It was just her luck that in William's case that flaw was lunacy.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“He isn’t so much flirting,” Cerise murmured. “Either he doesn’t like me or he doesn’t know how.”

“Of course he likes you. You’re lovely. He probably just doesn’t get it. Some men have to be hit over the head with it. Her aunt rolled her eyes. “I thought I’d have to draw your uncle Jean a giant sign. That or kidnap him and have my evil way with him, until he got the message.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“You said he was a soldier. You don't suppose...?"
"Oh, Gods." Ignata blinked. "You think something could be wrong down there?"
All of them looked at William, who chose this precise moment to slide the wet shirt back on his back, which required him to flex, raising his arms.
"That would be a shame," Cerise murmured.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“William strode to her. That’s how it’s done. Drink it in.
She surveyed the carnage behind him. “Did you have fun?”
He showed her his teeth. “Yes. Now they won’t take you anywhere.”
Cerise stepped closer to him, so close he only needed to lean in and dip his head and he would kiss her. Since he saved her, maybe he could just grab her and—
“That was the stupidest thing you have done since I’ve met you,” she ground out through her teeth.
Belay the grabbing.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“How did the hearing go?” she asked.
“We won, sort of,” Kaldar said. “We die at dawn.”
“The court gave the Sheeriles twenty-four hours,” William corrected.
“Yes, but ‘we die at dawn the day after tomorrow’ doesn’t sound nearly
as dramatic.”
“Does it have to be dramatic all the time?” Catherine murmured.
“Of course. Everyone has a talent. Yours is crocheting and mine is
making melodramatic statements.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“He had the prettiest hair she had ever seen on a man: dark brown, almost black, and soft like sable, it fell down to his shoulders. She wondered what he'd do if she threw some mud in it. Probably kill her.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“He was going to take a dive into this lake. He just didn’t know it. Cerise rose, finding footing in the soft mud. The water came up to just below her breasts and her wet shirt stuck to her body. William’s gaze snagged on her chest. Yep, keep looking, Lord Bill. Keeeeeep looking.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“She could've stared into those eyes for a thousand years and never noticed the time passing by.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“He’d spent the night in the boat. Next to the spaghetti queen.

William glanced at the hobo girl. She sat across from him, huddled in a clump. Her stench had gotten worse overnight, probably from the dampness. Another night like the last one, and he might snap and dunk her into that river just to clear the air.

She saw him looking. Dark eyes regarded him with slight scorn.

William leaned forward and pointed at the river. “I don’t know why you rolled in spaghetti sauce,” he said in a confidential voice. “I don’t really care. But that water over there won’t hurt you. Try washing it off.”

She stuck her tongue out.

“Maybe after you’re clean,” he said.

Her eyes widened. She stared at him for a long moment. A little crazy spark lit up in her dark irises. She raised her finger, licked it, and rubbed some dirt off her forehead.

Now what?

The girl showed him her stained finger and reached toward him slowly, aiming for his face.

“No,” William said. “Bad hobo.”

The finger kept coming closer.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“They hold a grudge like it was their family treasure.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“You said your cousin was a necromancer. You know how the natural necromancers operate?"

They twisted the head off your favorite doll, stuffed a dead bird into it, and made it walk around. And then they were puzzled why you got upset.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Failure happened. The trick was to accept the risk and try anyway.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“You say the sweetest things. And that spaghetti perfume you're wearing is to die for. No hobo could resist."
She snarled. Heh.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“I realized that I'm a child."
William looked point-blank at her chest. "No.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon

“Slowly the reality of the situation sank in. He got his ass kicked, learned nothing, and got saved by a dumb dog and an old lady. If he lived long enough to report to Nancy back in Adrianglia, he would have to gloss over this part.”
― Ilona Andrews, Bayou Moon